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Mia M
01-14-2008, 10:00 PM
conversate

:banghead:

xdamage
01-15-2008, 08:12 AM
U remember George Carlin's hippy-dippy weatherman X?

Somehow the phrase "hippy-dippy guy" completely escaped my notice all these years.

I do love the phrase "The Director" I am trying to work it into conversations now ;)

Everyman
01-15-2008, 03:32 PM
I appreciate all the responses. I really do -- I'm not a flame-thrower or a troll. They especially remind me that even though I've seen a LOT of strippers in the last year, they have only been in one market (SL) and a handful of clubs. So my experience is in no way universal -- although I have tried to relate my experience honestly, as I see it. A couple of additional thoughts.

1) Almost everything I have written applies to the "regular" relationship, where you see one girl a lot, or even just a club regular. It has nothing to do with the occasional visit to the club for some anonymous naked fun. That is an entirely different animal.

2) I guess what you see coming through is that I think the "regular" relationship is fucked up. In my particular case, I'm not upset about it, because we turned it into a friendship. But I will never have another one -- without it becoming something "more" (a friendship or a sexual relationship or a full relationship), what a customer gets back IMO is never worth the outlay. The best leverage time for the customer, unless you're putting out GOBS of money, is when it is unknown how much you'll eventually give out....the scent of great money is much more powerful than the sight of just-OK money.

3) I am fully aware that regular=loser, at least in this way -- no one who has a happy full life on the outside, goes looking for it as a strip club regular. I am not exempting myself from this rule. This rule does not apply to the occasional just-for-fun visit....both losers and non-losers do that. (: In fact, I'm surprised at the number of dancers who say they got started when they got "pulled up on stage" while there as a customer.

4) The blue side? Blech. Poke needles in my eyes. "WOO HOO, guess how much mileage I got last night!!!!!!!" I like mileage as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to talk about it (or anything else) with other customers

Jenny
01-15-2008, 03:58 PM
^^^
But you feel like coming here to inform us that we are not worth the money that our customers spend on us? You might want to look around and think - whether needles land in your eyes or not - where you really belong.

Everyman
01-15-2008, 04:50 PM
Not worth the money? You misunderstand me again, Jenny. For the casual encounters, the nudity and hotness you give out, you're worth WAY more than the "going rate" at the clubs. That's why I always tip well for that stuff.

For a regular, where you act as fake-pseudo-girlfriend, in my opinion (and clearly others disagree, because they return and give the money), the return is not worth the customer's investment.

That opinion makes me a bad guy worthy of the blue side? I'm civil, articulate, have a basis for my opinions.....you don't want to just talk to people who agree with you, do you?

Jenny
01-15-2008, 04:58 PM
My friend - let us not start labeling our own attributes. I mean - after all, I may have a different idea on what constitutes "articulate" and "basis" than you do. And more than one guy on the blue side has civility and a level of articulateness that would deeply shame you.

And I knew what you meant. And that is what I was responding to.

Finally - no. Constant agreement is not necessary. Something that is necessary is a basic shared premise. Customers who visit to inform us that we are not worth the money are not welcome here. You have nothing worthwhile to offer us. You might say that you are not worth the bandwidth.

If you would like to discuss something that does not allude to strippers being a waste of money, you are welcome to. I would suggest that you don't toe the line. If you need to ask if it is appropriate - take it to the blue side. Jay and FBR like you guys. They do. They told me.

Everyman
01-15-2008, 05:16 PM
I assume you're aware that most men in America, likely far > 90%, aren't strip club regulars. They already show with their pocketbook that they don't think it's worth it.

The fact that such a mainstream concept shows up on this board, shouldn't be threatening to you. But if it is, hey, go ahead and insulate yourself from my radical ideas.

Jenny
01-15-2008, 05:33 PM
Everyman;
I think I've approached this wrong. What I'm trying to tell you is that conversation of why strippers "aren't worth it" aren't appropriate for here. I wasn't trying to say it was threatening or that all men disagree with you, nor was I trying to invite you to to make more such commentary or to make up statistics. Like I said - try to consider what you have to offer us before you decide that pink is the right side for you.

Katrine
01-15-2008, 05:49 PM
For a regular, where you act as fake-pseudo-girlfriend, in my opinion (and clearly others disagree, because they return and give the money), the return is not worth the customer's investment.


Nor are regulars worth the dancer's investment, in many cases. But who are you to judge? If both parties willingly enter into the arrangement, then the culpability lies with them alone.

I mean, please, most of these relationships involve men with women half their age, with little in common, and no physical attraction. Are men so deluded to think they have a chance by lavishing money upon these young girls? Obviously so, but you can't call the dancer cunning or sinister. She is simple an opportunist like most of us.

xdamage
01-15-2008, 08:24 PM
4) The blue side? Blech. Poke needles in my eyes. "WOO HOO, guess how much mileage I got last night!!!!!!!" I like mileage as much as the next guy, but I have no desire to talk about it (or anything else) with other customers

I've been reading blue for a long time. In fact very little of what is discussed is about customer mileage. On the other hand there is a quite a lot of discussion about customer/dancer dynamics. I think you would have found your posts fit better over there. Just saying.

Lapaholic
01-15-2008, 09:35 PM
<snip> most of these relationships involve men with women half their age, with little in common, and no physical attraction. Are men so deluded to think they have a chance by lavishing money upon these young girls?

Ur killing me with all your "reality" and stuff.... I mean a near 50 guy could have a lot in common and have serious mutual physical attraction with some 19 yo stripper... somewhere, in a far far off galaxy, in a not-so-parallel universe in a sort-of similar dimension. Right? :)

Brendita
01-15-2008, 09:43 PM
If you stop responding to this thread he will have nothing to feed off of. Just a thought.

UtahMike
01-15-2008, 10:30 PM
Your theories ( I wont call it your truth - that is a bit hippie man) that u have gleaned from 2 visits to a strip club (Or even 200 visits to a sc ), may be wrong.

Actually, he does not even have theories, just hypotheses. I have yet to see the evidence of research that would establish them as theories.

yoda57us
01-16-2008, 12:43 PM
So, it appears to me that after all of this time you are sorta kinda finally admitting that you fell for a stripper, spent a lot of money on her, and it didn't work out the way you thought it should...Why didn't you just say that in the first place?

Pretty_Penny
01-17-2008, 12:33 AM
i don't know what's more typical, telling us how smart you are or trying to "stir shit up" on an internet message board.

*yawn*

Everyman
01-22-2008, 09:05 AM
To Jenny and others -- I really wasn't trying to offend anyone, and if I did, I apologize. After more than a year of heavy visits, I have reached some conclusions of what this whole scene is about...and thought this was the place to share them. Since most of you are in "this scene" a lot more and a lot longer than I have been, I seem silly and presumptuous. Fair enough.

To "shit-stirrer" -- well, sort of. But I never set out to say anything intentionally provocative or anything I don't actually believe. I just spoke my mind. Besides, if no one stirs any shit, what would we all do? Just sing Kumbaya together?

To Yoda -- you're reading between the lines, but you haven't got it quite right. I will always defer to you for customer wisdom, though.

Phil-W
01-22-2008, 12:17 PM
^^^

Well, you've certainly found the secret of success on here - telling the ladies how to do their jobs.

If you want to go for the jackpot, try telling them how to price their dances to get maximum income. That *really* is a topic they like advice on.

Phil. }:D

xdamage
01-22-2008, 05:56 PM
To Yoda -- you're reading between the lines, but you haven't got it quite right.

I have to admit, a part of me also wonders if you fell for a stripper (it happens) and this was your way to cope, a lot of analysis.

hockeybobby
01-22-2008, 08:49 PM
So, it appears to me that after all of this time you are sorta kinda finally admitting that you fell for a stripper, spent a lot of money on her, and it didn't work out the way you thought it should...Why didn't you just say that in the first place?

The first step is to admit it. That's the hardest 'harder truth'. Don't worry dude, we're all with ya man. ;)
hb

Perry
01-22-2008, 08:57 PM
1. I just want my regular to live (see http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showthread.php?t=106932)

2. Coworkers date. It's the natural progression in the adult world from going to the prom with your lab partner in high school.

3. Stop trying to figure out strippers and start trying to figure out women. You're acting like we drink blood and you're trying to warn the world. Well, not really the world, just the strippers...::)

jaizaine
01-24-2008, 08:08 PM
How I have missed these sort of threads while I have been away.

I agree that the majority (I wont give a statistic because statistics are bullshit on the most part) of men are not regular strip club visitors and would not fall into the regular relationship with a dancer.
I also agree that something is missing in their life and they are trying to fill the void by entering into an artificial "relationship" in a strip club.
Not all dancers have regulars but they are a good source of income to many dancers.
For whatever reason these people are involving themselves in this situation why does it bother you so much?

I totally agree that it's not worth the monetary outlay for the customer because you are not going to ever get what you want out of the situation unless you truly only want the fantasy.

It's sounds like you have fallen for a stripper or many strippers and now you are bitter about it.

Phil-W
01-24-2008, 10:13 PM
I also agree that something is missing in their life and they are trying to fill the void by entering into an artificial "relationship" in a strip club.

There's also the 'availability' factor. In real life, a 40 something guy does not normally walk to to a 20 year old drop dead gorgeous girl and get her immediate attention. Nor will she flirt enthusiastically with him. In the artificial environment of a SC, both things happen.

Throw into the mix that the great majority of guys coming into a SC don't see a dancer outside of work and hence never see the difference between the 'work' and 'real life' parts of a dancers life, and you've got some persuasive reasons for regulars thinking they do have a chance in the future.


I totally agree that it's not worth the monetary outlay for the customer because you are not going to ever get what you want out of the situation unless you truly only want the fantasy.

True, if you're talking about moving from an ITC relationship to a genuine OTC one. However, I think there are a number of dancer/regular relationships that do move outside the club on a pay for play basis. Some are relatively innocent - paid for dinners, etc - and some essentially payment for sex.

But still monetary outlay for the regular in both cases.


It's sounds like you have fallen for a stripper or many strippers and now you are bitter about it.

And today's score: little brain - 1, common sense - 0.

Phil.

Deogol
01-26-2008, 07:48 AM
So, it appears to me that after all of this time you are sorta kinda finally admitting that you fell for a stripper, spent a lot of money on her, and it didn't work out the way you thought it should...Why didn't you just say that in the first place?


Some generalizations about everyman would be an interesting and entertaining turn of the thread. }:D

hockeybobby
01-26-2008, 09:53 AM
If you stop responding to this thread he will have nothing to feed off of. Just a thought.

But Brendita, then I will have nothing to feed off of too. We must continue this thread. It is good fun! ;)

Everyman: Have you learned any new truths in the last few days?
hb

hockeybobby
01-26-2008, 10:01 AM
Some generalizations about everyman would be an interesting and entertaining turn of the thread. }:D

Bingo!
hb

ViolaStrings
02-02-2008, 03:21 PM
Go to the blue side. Follow the light.

torchemily
02-02-2008, 04:15 PM
2) Most girls will never ever ever ever ever ever "date" (as in fall for emotionally, as opposed to "pretend date" for the money) a customer. But a lot of them fuck the bouncer, the door guy, the DJ, the owner...whatever male is in the club who's not a customer.
:laughing: It's funny how things work out sometimes...
I can say that the reason why dancers rarely if ever date a customer is b/c when you ask a dancer for a date or something more intimate than the club, remember that she has been asked the same thing about 50 times already that night by, well, customers. Ask yourself, what makes you so different from the last guy that just asked her the same question 5 min. ago? Dancers go to work for work, not usually for more than that. ::)

xoxoGracexoxo
02-04-2008, 10:33 AM
If you can only see her as a "stripper" why should she ever see you as anything more than a "customer"?


Dude, it's a business relationship. It's how these ladies pay their bills and get to eat. It doesn't get any more real than that.


Your observations are a bit limited in order for you to declare something as "true" when it concerns a population as large as stripperdom, dont u think?


The lady is not there for any other reason than to entertain you and get paid for it. With all of your observations, if you don't realize this then you have learned nothing...at least nothing that matters...


Dancers at work tend to have artificial personalities - they play the stereotypical stripper cos that's what earns them the money.

So you're constructing an entire theory on dancers motivations based on the act that they put on for you - the customer. And which is very different from them in real life.

It's a bit like drawing conclusions about the pyschology of actors after watching them perform one of Shakespeare's play. "That Lear - he's mental".

Can I just say? It might be lost on the OP, but I for one am speechless to see that every argument I would have advanced has already been taken up by the boys from the blue side. Fellas, your sophisticated understanding of the subtleties of stripper/customer dynamic, your firm grasp of ontological argument, the Shakespeare reference....I think I'm, um, aroused. Who can be at my place in 15minutes?

PrettyCurlieQ
02-04-2008, 10:38 AM
Why are you trying to discover the hidden meaning of things or unlock the mysteries of the strippers and strip clubs? Most guys go to the club to fantasize and to find companionship. Or maybe to have fun. Try that.

hockeybobby
02-04-2008, 05:49 PM
Can I just say? It might be lost on the OP, but I for one am speechless to see that every argument I would have advanced has already been taken up by the boys from the blue side. Fellas, your sophisticated understanding of the subtleties of stripper/customer dynamic, your firm grasp of ontological argument, the Shakespeare reference....I think I'm, um, aroused. Who can be at my place in 15minutes?

Fuck! What happened? What'd I miss????
hb

yoda57us
02-04-2008, 06:24 PM
Can I just say? It might be lost on the OP, but I for one am speechless to see that every argument I would have advanced has already been taken up by the boys from the blue side. Fellas, your sophisticated understanding of the subtleties of stripper/customer dynamic, your firm grasp of ontological argument, the Shakespeare reference....I think I'm, um, aroused. Who can be at my place in 15minutes?

Damn! I KNEW I should have checked SW when I got up this morning....

wittaya1978
02-10-2008, 04:22 AM
Actually - I'm analytical enough to be unthreatened by relativists and not have to refer to them as "hippy-dippy guys". Being analytical doesn't mean that you have to falsely conflate experience to develop a universal rule or even tendency where one doesn't exist; nor does it mean that one can't acknowledge a different approach or mode of analysis than one's own. Stop making us analytical people look bad.

What I'm saying is that there is no uniformity of experience in many of the things (including strippers) that you are seeking to have "findings" about and seeking to to jam them all into a category and try to understand the category rather than the people speaks to a narrowness of mind and an unwillingness to acknowledge variety - not a keen analysis.

Very thoughtful, intelligent and articulate post--but I disagree. It would be nice if all things in life, especialy people, could be judged on an individual basis. Such a way of life, however, would be impossible. While I am perfectly willing to acknowledge variety and try to understand the individual rather than the category, it is just plain more economical if one can identify certain characteristics generally applicable to a category in order to help with (especially initial) decisions.

For example, there are thousands of sidewalk grates in San Francisco. Most of these grates are perfectly safe, but at least one has been faulty and caused a person to fall through, injuring him/herself. You could stop and examine each one (or avoid them altogether) but, on a whole, most grates are perfectly safe and, thus, most people are benefited in the aggregate by assuming that every grate they encounter is safe.

Unfortunately, there are certain characteristics that, while not applicable to ALL dancers, they are applicable to a higher percentage of dancers than the non-dancer population. Some of these characteristics are useful to know when dealing with dancers b/c they can aid in decisions, give people things to look out for, etc.

For example, if you start to date a dancer and she is telling you that you are not just another customer, but she then proceeds to ask you to help her with her mortgage, etc., be wary. She might be different, and if you really like her you should stick around and find out if that is so. But you at least need to go in with more skepticism about her intentions than say the dental hygienist you met at starbucks.

In my experience, the following stereotypes of dancers are "true" in the sense that, not only are they more likely to be true of dancers than non-dancers, but you would be a fool not to consider them when considering, for e.g., to try and date one, be a regular, be a boyfriend, what have you:

1. Dancers are more likely to be drug abusers than the non-dancer population. (Note: This is also true of lots of other professions, including my own. That doesn't make it any less true.)

2. Dancers are good liars and are more likely to be lying to you about their personal life, their interest in you, etc. This may seem obvious (b/c it is), but then let's not pretend when counseling love-stuck guys on this board that it's not true.

3. Dancers are more likely to be motivated by money in their interactions with people. This is true regardles of whether you are INSIDE or OUTSIDE of the club. Unfortunately, they are also more likely to be prone to bad spending/saving habits.

4. Dancers are more likely to be "flaky" and disorganized (and in real life, not just as a cover as to why they missed that lunch date they scheduled with you in order to extract more money).

5. Dancers are more likely to be single mothers. This isn't a judgment, just a fact.

While these things do not preclude a dancer you meet from NOT being a drug user, or NOT flaky, etc., it would behoove the young men on this board to take these considerations into account when deciding to open up their wallet, give out their phone number, interpret why the dancer never called back, etc. In other words, it is more possible when dating a dancer that she lied and actually has a kid at home than if you were dealing with the dental hygienist from starbucks. It's also more possible that her erratic behavior is attributable to drugs and not simply PMS.

For the record, I am not claiming to be an expert on dancers. Nor do I claim to have performed a sufficiently large and random sampling do state these "truths" with scientific certainty. ButI have dated two dancers, the second of which I currently live with and am engaged to. And obviously I know (and hear all the stories about) a large number of her dancer friends. And yes, she fits or did fit at least some of these stereotypes. That doesn't make her a bad person or make me love her any less.