View Full Version : He didn't call
Optimist
02-13-2008, 12:03 PM
^^^^^No stalking! (you were joking, right Dottie?)
Date around and don't put heavy expectations on the guy. Since he's a good companion and fun in bed don't cut him off. He should be one of many dudes that you're seeing.
Dottie Rebel
02-13-2008, 04:39 PM
^^^Haha...I wish!
I was 20 and a lesbian (so I thought) but took one look at him and said, "I want that one!" I went on a campaign. He didn't really want me or anything other girl at the time. But I knew fromt he day I met him he was my husband. He just didn't know it yet. I figuratively steamrolled him into a relationship and now I wonder why I feel lonely and unappreciated sometimes... ::)
So when I jump all over the women here for going head over heels for a guy who is just lukewarm to you it's because I know from experience how that ends up.
kandie_kitten
02-13-2008, 04:43 PM
^I have the same thing.
My boyfriend was very reluctant to be with me (he was friends with an ex, and wa safraid of drama) and I basically didn't give him a choice. I was so persistant, eventually he caved.
It's a year later now, and I love him deeply, and I truly believe he does love me...but we still have fights about my nsecurity, and how I worry he doesn't want me now, because he didn't then.
He's wonderful, and I adore him...but I do sometimes wonder what would have happened if I had let him go, and had someone pursue ME for a chance...
sun child
02-13-2008, 06:31 PM
Thanks for being straight up with me Optimist. It's good to hear some honest constructive criticism. I wrote him a final text saying if he ever needed anything he could call me and I hope he's ok since I haven't heard from him. I'm going to just let this go now and date other guys. The thing is, and I know this might seem supercilious (I don't mean it that way), this has never happened to me before. I've completely blown guys off for little things, leaving them wondering what happened. But I've never, ever had a guy blow me off this way before. He turned the tables on me, leaving me wondering what happened and what I did wrong. In reality it's obvious to see that a) he really is busy b) he just doesn't care too much c) I did something to weird him out or d) there's another girl in the picture, someone that maybe he's going nuts over!
I do need to work on the issues that cause me to form co-dependent relationships, obsessions, insecurities, etc. — this is something that madmaxine pointed out to me a while back. I do feel like I'm making progress. When I hear about the way some guys treat their girlfriends or wives, it makes me really want to wait for a relationship like that. So DottieRebel, I do see your dilemma.
Thanks for all the advice. :)