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SportsWriter2
02-09-2008, 04:40 PM
the reason she left the club without telling you is because she probably had a money-making opportunity OTC. Or there was a badass party going on and that was more important to her than money. This is a great industry for a party girl to be in because you can do whatever you want.
Truth jt. Play for the impulse, not the commitment. :D

xoxoGracexoxo
02-09-2008, 08:23 PM
Well, I have some sympathy for you. You got bad customer service. Why? Who knows. Maybe a customer took her to VIP for the night and she told the manager to tell you she was gone. Maybe she passed out in the dressing room. Maybe she had an emergency and left the club. Whatever. If she consistently disappoints you, find another girl. Which is what you said you were going to do. Problem solved.

(I think James Bond is very astute saying that acting flaky can a way to keep a customer from getting too close. Admittedly, if I feel like a customer is getting obsessive or weird, I will leave his messages unanswered a few days, just to subltly make the point that I'm NOT his girlfriend.)

jt777
02-10-2008, 01:46 AM
Yea, thanks for the reality check everyone. i dont want to put up with this crap any longer XoXoGrace, and i thank you for your sympathy. Heck, i always go for VIP as the floor's chairs are uncomfy so it must have been an OTC or CR. i guess the night shift girls are much different than the daytime girls (thats what my previous 2 favorites work, mostly during daytime).

to VeraLynn:

Honestly goes a long way in keeping a regular. I dont mean like honestly in giving details about you that are personal, just dont say you are going to do one thing and then do a 180.

My past favorites would tell me what day they are working and they give me priority. It really makes me feel appreciated as a regular, knowing that when u get into the club, your favorite is ready to be with you, and not make you wait for hours, and i reciprocate that in getting alot of dances.

VeraLynn
02-10-2008, 10:34 AM
jt777:

Thanks for your thoughts. I'm not a shy person physically or mentally. I obviously take safety measures and I am not telling people my address or anything that could help them find me. Regulars always catch my attention when they arrive and I make eye contact with them so they see that I realize they are there for me. There have been times when they have told me "Go make some money, I'll wait for you" if they saw that I was busy with inquiries... which is awesome. It shows me that they understand me and why I am there. They realize I give them my all when I am dancing for them, and I mean all of myself, not some fake personality. In return, they have some patience, don't want me to be rushed.. and obviously help me out with some cash.

It makes a lot of sense to me in a lot of ways. I seem to attract different guys than the dancers who do put on a "work persona." This isn't necessarily bad.. something I've noticed in years of dancing is that it's nearly always good to be different. For example, everyone else is wearing black, trashy-style outfits? I try to wear red or white, full-length, classy.

Phil-W
02-10-2008, 01:13 PM
My past favorites would tell me what day they are working and they give me priority. It really makes me feel appreciated as a regular, knowing that when u get into the club, your favorite is ready to be with you, and not make you wait for hours, and i reciprocate that in getting alot of dances.

jt777,

I think you've got to be pragmatic about what your relationship is with a dancer when she's working - she'll see you as a customer first and foremost. However, as long as you make it clear you want to keep it ITC there's no reason why you can't have a friendly and affectionate relationship with her as well.

To end up on good terms with a dancer, you have to see things a little through her eyes as well - she wants a 'low maintenance' regular she can relax with. That means you have to respect her personal limits and avoid doing anything that makes her uncomfortable.

My personal rule of thumb has always been to treat a dancer exactly the same as any woman outside of the club - keep the conversation on safe topics, avoid talking about her job and treat what she does purely as an unconventional form of entertainment.

From my experience, do that and you'll find most dancers will be very pleased to see you while you're in the club. They're both earning *and* having a pleasant time - which makes you a customer they'll want to come back again and again.

Treat a dancer well - and in the great majority of cases, they'll treat you well right back.

Phil.

VeraLynn
02-10-2008, 01:23 PM
Phil: I could not agree with you more. Obviously, guys come in because we offer something they need.. or at least want. Us dancers obviously are working for tips. It's a give and take relationship... both parties getting something out of it.

I will go out of my way to do something extra for my regulars, especially if they have been known to do the same for me.

3-Legged Man
02-10-2008, 02:08 PM
jt777,
Some of what you describe sounds familiar to a situation I've been in. Being a "regular" is not an exclusive relationship, at least to the dancer. I'm sure your fave has other regulars, and one may have shown up at the time of your last visit. Sometimes we just have to wait our turn. The reward is usually worth the inconvenience. If you can't stand waiting for this dancer, then you are right to investigate other options. But it's not likely that ANY dancer will drop everything whenever you show up, unless you are the type to spend $10K per visit.

jt777
02-10-2008, 08:28 PM
i can't believe someone would be so heartless as her. i dont mean to say that she should give me dances after i did all these things for her:

- We had set up the time to meet at the club, i took the time to drive 45 mins to see her, then she wanted food and i took her to go eat as she doesn't have a car yet. Then after we got back to the club, she told me she would be ready in 10 mins to give me dances afte she finishes on stage. I felt like she used me to drive her to get food and then just forget about me.

but man, how about a little common courtesy for your regular (ex-regular now) and at least tell me what is going on so that i can wait for you or leave and come back another day.

I pretty much told her off and told her that if she wanted me to be her regular, then why act like this? if she doesnt want me to be her regular, thats fine too. and that she shouldn't dance for someone she doesnt like. I really liked her but it appears that she hates me. it seems she has a racial prejudice towards me too. she never answered me back. :-\

it really sucks that she did not even want to make eye contact with me while on stage the other night when she said that she had to go on stage first, then come over and dance for me, which she just disappeared right after.

i kinda want to go back to the club tomorrow as my other favorite usually works monday. i just hope this one doesnt show up too or it will be akward.

AznExtasy
02-10-2008, 09:10 PM
I've had regulars in the past that became a huge pain in the ass because they felt entitled to sit and chat FOREVER before spending any money, and then sit and chat FOREVER again. They became a leech on my time and emotions, since I have problems of my own and can't deal with talking about other people's life issues and deep stuff all the time.. for little or no money. At the club, I'm counting down the time and watching my money grow, it makes no sense to stick around and mingle with someone to make them feel good just because they are a "regular".

That's a problem I often face with regulars. If you don't do any of this and she still treats you badly, it's time to go back to your other favorite girl. Maybe she dissed you because she can't handle a mental attachment. I do that sometimes, when I feel like someone is trying to get a hold of me emotionally, I repel all their advances. Some dancers prefer not to be exclusive with any one customer. It seems like you are taking it way too personal that she "flaked" on you. Don't. You should just find a girl who will treat you better.

jt777
02-10-2008, 11:12 PM
i never ask her to sit and chat. i just want to come in and get dances from her and get the heck out of there. i have no reason to stay and chat after i get my dances because i got what i came there for: some hot and mindless fun.

my other favorite would start to come and sit on my lap and chat with me for a few songs (i never asked her to sit and chat with me, she just started doing it herself) before asking for a dance. i am not going to refuse that because even though it may be SS, it still feels nice to have a conversation to catch up on things before the fun begins. it feels like there is actually a friendly bond between the two of us so i like that too. personality counts too and i hope my other favorite is going to be there monday to totally take my mind away from all the crap i had to put up with the past few visits. :O

cameron_keys
02-11-2008, 12:49 PM
i never ask her to sit and chat. i just want to come in and get dances from her and get the heck out of there. i have no reason to stay and chat after i get my dances because i got what i came there for: some hot and mindless fun.



Maybe tell her you want dances now because you are short on time?

xdamage
02-11-2008, 09:42 PM
i can't believe someone would be so heartless as her. .... I pretty much told her off and told her that if she wanted me to be her regular, then why act like this? ...

I think a lot of us guys cannot even relate to the notion of being her regular like she is doing you some kind of favor. Let me be honest with you. A lot of what you have written sounds like you allow yourself to be walked on, and so people do, and maybe you even attract people that do, yes, even "heartless" people. You are the customer. Spend your money on whoever you want. If she doesn't want your money, spend it on someone else. You owe her nothing more, she owes you nothing more. And really, when you are treated badly by someone you are paying, common sense (i.e.., a pair of ball, a spine, some self respect) should be telling you, don't waste your time fretting over it. Move on, and spend money on someone who treats you fair and square. Simple.

blaze_n_hot
02-11-2008, 10:38 PM
i can't believe someone would be so heartless as her.

You sound like you're way too emotionally attached. Whenever I get that kind of vibe from a custie, I unconsciously do the same types of passive-aggressive stuff that your fave is doing to push them away. Emo custies really creep me out. :scared:

jt777
02-15-2008, 03:21 AM
so blaze_n_hot, what if the emo custies show up at the club again and want some dances from you?

does that mean that you would ignore their request and never dance for them ever again?

JoeUnCool
02-15-2008, 07:39 AM
I have been dancing for about 9 years now, and I must be really an odd duck. I find it VERY hard to lie to customers. My fiance has told me that he wouldn't mind if I claimed to be single. I don't wear either of my diamond rings (one of not my engagement ring, but a small diamond solitaire nonetheless) while orking because I don't want to turn anyone off with a peice of jewelry. I'm not exactly trying to walk around a club in a veil, but I also don't lie when someone asks if I have a man.

I've had some very loyal regulars because of my sheer honesty. Also, many of the guys coming to see dancers aren't single either. They could also be lying! It seems that I get fewer guys asking me how much I'd cost as a take-home girl when they realize that I'm a real person just as they are, I enjoy having naked fun while at the club, and that's where it ends.

I think that it might also drive home the point that I'm there to earn a living, not because I'm a single, wild, under-sexed chick looking to go home with the first guy who asks.


VeraLynn,

WOW! It is great to hear this amount of honesty! The level of honesty that you display is hopefully something that helps you out. You sound like the girl I refer to as "Mother Teresa." I hope it pays off well for you!!!!!!!!!!

That's Mr. UnCool to You

JoeUnCool
02-15-2008, 08:20 AM
A lot of customers are flaky liars.
just sayin'

I think that a high percentage of people are "flaky." It doesn't matter what the profession is. There are just a lot of bad people out there.

Personally, I don't lie to the girls. When the girls ask too many questions, I tend to clam up. I've had a girl tell me I ruined her life, I've had another girl hunt me down from DC when I used to go up there, I've had a girl tell me I sexually cheated on her (I never had sex with her btw), and other things. The girl that told me I ruined her life made me nervous because after that I did a background check and found out she had some type of conviction on drugs and guns. It wasn't surprising as I felt like she held back in talking to me. After that experience, I decided just to have canned answer of "I'm not comfortable with that" if the girl asks too much. As a result, I don't lie, but when the girl asks for my lastname or my business card, I tell them I'm not comfortable with them knowing too much about me. I'm very protective of my personal information now.

The UnCool One

PS. Now I come on an Internet Web Board and talk about, how stupid is that?

xxxblueeyesxxx
02-15-2008, 09:01 AM
i never ask her to sit and chat. i just want to come in and get dances from her and get the heck out of there. i have no reason to stay and chat after i get my dances because i got what i came there for: some hot and mindless fun.


It doesn't really sound like you're doing your part to keep it "hot and mindless", as you are on a stripper site talking about the "end" of your "relationship" with the girl.

Also, when you mentioned that a dancer should never dance for someone she doesn't like - doesn't a lawyer defend ax murderers? Does that mean he has to LIKE the ax murderer in order to defend him? Nope. (Obviously, I'm not comparing you to an ax murderer). Seriously though, people represent, work for and with clients and customers that they dislike every day. In the "real" world, doing so makes you a professional, in the SC, it makes you a bitchy flake... ::)

And while I don't think it was polite of her to never come back after you had driven her there, in all honesty, you DO come across rather needy, and a bit whiny.. I'm sure you're a nice guy, and the money you spend is money in her pocket if she keeps you smiling, but I personally have VERY VERY little patience for customers that need their egos stroked and pet constantly. You kinda get on my nerves, and I don't even know you.. Though, if you paypal me a tip, I'm POSITIVE I would think you were just the sweetest guy *bats eyes* ::)

Conclusion, if you want your SC experience to be "mindless fun", stop putting so much thought INTO the fun. You truly sound like you're discussing the end of a three year long, live in girlfriend. She's a STRIPPER. ;)

Daisa
02-24-2008, 03:06 PM
The weird part is that she asked you to be her regular!! Who does that?
Jaizaine, that is exactly what I was thinking as I read that post...after all, doesn't the regular thing just kinda happen? I couldn't even imagine sitting there with a customer after a visit or two and saying, "hmm..I really like you, could you maybe become my regular?"