View Full Version : Meeting a SW girl at her club
Katrine
03-11-2008, 03:47 PM
Well. I think if you factor in the geographical inconvenience, my disinclination to top and her inevitable embarrassment when she would have to introduce me to her friends as an aging Canadian stripper... I think we could be similarly poorly situated. Anyway. This is about how guys here can spend money on stripperweb girls; not how to get me a date with Katrine. Way to threadjack, hb.
I will never judge you my sweet dove. Come, come to Texas, where I will smother you in barbeque sauce and love. }:D
Katrine
03-11-2008, 03:49 PM
Did any of you guys get extras from a SW girl?
I've fucked a couple, does that count?:-\
Katrine
03-11-2008, 03:49 PM
I'm sorry, you lose at The Internet. Ever heard of something called "boundaries"?
You are rad. I hope we can meet when I go to Portland sometime this summer.
doc-catfish
03-11-2008, 03:52 PM
Its more fun when you go with them to strip clubs they dont work at }:D
Show of hands...who's dones that? It sounds like a blast....
:wave: Oh, it is. It is.
Why should I care?
If our answer to your previous question was yes, why should we tell you?
Katrine
03-11-2008, 03:52 PM
Sorry this is the blue side, not the pink side
OTOH, safado is correct. He can say what he wants. Its a good opportunity for us to have a chuckle at his expense versus crying to the mods like everyone would upstairs.
Only boundary i care about is the one one made by trojan between my cock and nasty pinkies.
miabella
03-11-2008, 04:53 PM
i feel certain mrpunk has met more than a few SWers at their clubs, whether they knew it to be the case or not.
yoda57us
03-11-2008, 05:31 PM
Why should I care?
Honestly, It makes no difference to me if you care or not. You posted, I posted. Life goes on....
mr_punk
03-11-2008, 05:44 PM
i feel certain mrpunk has met more than a few SWers at their clubs, whether they knew it to be the case or not.LOL..i have no idea either, but you might be right. now, that would be funny.
Docido
03-11-2008, 05:49 PM
I doubt I'll ever meet any SW ladies. But if I did and there were extras, you know the old saying, "Loose Lips." :-X
If an SWer was turning tricks, would you narc on her?
All Good Things
03-17-2008, 10:14 PM
Acceptable etiquette has been described quite well here. At the very least, allow the dancer to invite you and never the other way around.
"Best practices," though, really dictate that you wait for the dancer to PM you. This eliminates even the hint of stalkerishness and allows you to have an enjoyable PM "relationship" with her that may or may not result in a meeting, either at her club or at a different location.
I've met about 25 - 30 SW dancers -- not sure of exactly how many -- which of course includes SFVegas I and my home club dancers as well as dancers who PM me directly. I will occasionally PM one to thank her for a comment posted on the boards, or for some other reason, and something grows from there. I've had the very same enjoyable experiences described by everybody else here.
Except, well, Kat was right. I wish she would have warned me about that before, though.
For a long time, Nina Daisy held the crown as the only SW dancer who didn't respond to a PM from me. Then once we met in Vegas, she decided I wasn't a complete monster after all. I think Scarlett then took over the title and may very well still have it, but I have to check. That probably won't stand, as she's asked me on the public board to consider meeting when she's down in D.C., which was a completely charming and disarming thing to do, which only makes me think even more highly of her. Generally, the dancers here couldn't have been more responsive, engaging, intelligent or generous.
There has been only one SW dancer who has outright refused to meet me at her club, even after I broke every rule I just described above like a complete moron by PM-ing her myself and inviting myself and another dancer together to visit her (actually, I was responding to a PM she had sent me on a closely-related topic, but I brought up the club visit, so it counts as a moron move). That's even after I talked to her on the phone (briefly). I think we all know who that is. ;D Not that I've ever stopped, not for one second, being entirely smitten and enchanted by her.
mr_punk
03-18-2008, 04:37 AM
"Best practices," though, really dictate that you wait for the dancer to PM you. This eliminates even the hint of stalkerishness and allows you to have an enjoyable PM "relationship" with her that may or may not result in a meeting, either at her club or at a different location.bwhahaha...as much as i've seen these girls shill. best practices, my ass.
Katrine
03-18-2008, 05:44 AM
That's even after I talked to her on the phone (briefly). I think we all know who that is. ;D Not that I've ever stopped, not for one second, being entirely smitten and enchanted by her.
Nope, no clue who that is.
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 05:57 AM
Acceptable etiquette has been described quite well here. At the very least, allow the dancer to invite you and never the other way around.
I think I'll just forget about it. It was just an idea that popped into my head. I like to get out and meet people, talk, and socialize (however, I have no plans on opening up that side of my life here, in fact, I've probably already said to much in some threads). Trying to figure out how to not look stalkerish or like a perv would just be too hard.
Joe
Katrine
03-18-2008, 06:19 AM
Just post a thread in Custy Convo, "I'll be in XYZ town, what are the best clubs?" Easy.
GenWar
03-18-2008, 10:50 AM
My only advice, as someone who has met a few of them, is, don't put any pressure on it. Last Friday, I went to a club where a male pinkie works. I had the waitress send him a note telling him I was around and would like to meet, if he was up for it. I put clearly, "No pressure..." He never came over and I don't think any less of him for it. Some people just aren't up for it.
If you build it up in your mind to the point where you will be disappointed if it doesn't happen, then you will ultimately put too much pressure on it and blow the whole deal. Just relax and let it happen. And if you are meeting a dancer, buy all the drinks, dammit. :)
-gen
GenWar
03-18-2008, 10:54 AM
I will never judge you my sweet dove. Come, come to Texas, where I will smother you in barbeque sauce and love. }:D
Whoa...Now THAT is a mental picture. *sigh* :)
-gen
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 12:15 PM
My only advice, as someone who has met a few of them, is, don't put any pressure on it. Last Friday, I went to a club where a male pinkie works. I had the waitress send him a note telling him I was around and would like to meet, if he was up for it. I put clearly, "No pressure..." He never came over and I don't think any less of him for it. Some people just aren't up for it.
If you build it up in your mind to the point where you will be disappointed if it doesn't happen, then you will ultimately put too much pressure on it and blow the whole deal. Just relax and let it happen. And if you are meeting a dancer, buy all the drinks, dammit. :)
-gen
Actually, its not a big deal. I thought it would be fun to meet one and say hello. However, as i've thought this through, I've now go two reasons not to. It exposes me to some risk I am just not willing to take.
My anonimity is crucial to me. I've shared more than I should have on this forum.
It also goes against my style and sets an expectation that I will not live upto. I'm very lowkey when I go to a club. I'm the hand up Mona Lisa's skirt. I do little to attract attention anymore. I don't make it rain. I like to go into a club and find who I want to. By talking with someone before hand, it sets an expectation that I'll spend some money on them. Its my money, I'll spend my money the way I want to.
Joe
Jenny
03-18-2008, 12:29 PM
It also goes against my style and sets and expectation that I will not live upto. I'm very lowkey when I go to a club. I'm the hand up Mona Lisa's skirt. I do little to attract attention anymore. I don't make it rain. I like to go into a club and find who I want to. By talking with someone before hand, it sets an expectation that I'll spend some money on them. Its my money, I'll spend my money the way I want to.
JoeWell that is a very good reason not to do it. Arranging to meet a stripper at a club, having her make herself available to you and then not spending money on her would be extremely impolite.
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 12:33 PM
Well that is a very good reason not to do it. Arranging to meet a stripper at a club, having her make herself available to you and then not spending money on her would be extremely impolite.
I would consider it extremely rude. I'm not willing to set an expectation that I would not follow through on.
Joe
Jenny
03-18-2008, 12:35 PM
Or... I mean you could send a message saying that you would like to meet up in her club and that you might not spend any money on her. That might be funny.
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 12:38 PM
Or... I mean you could send a message saying that you would like to meet up in her club and that you might not spend any money on her. That might be funny.
I don't think my young eyes could weather the F bombs that would in that PM.
Joe
Jenny
03-18-2008, 12:40 PM
^^^
Dude - I actually got one of those once.
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 12:47 PM
^^^
Dude - I actually got one of those once.
OMG! I feel for you. That's rather rude.
Jenny
03-18-2008, 12:50 PM
Well - I was more puzzled than offended (like "what? Why would I do that?"). And I moved on to amused pretty quick.
Katrine
03-18-2008, 01:17 PM
Last Friday, I went to a club where a male pinkie works. I had the waitress send him a note telling him I was around and would like to meet, if he was up for it. I put clearly, "No pressure..." He never came over and I don't think any less of him for it. Some people just aren't up for it.
-gen
Actually, gen, and I might be mistaken, you saw one of the pinkie DJ's, correct? No need to say who it was. Unlike dancers, DJ's are often tied to their booth most of the night. When they do get short breaks, they might want to go smoke or shit, or what have you.
Unless he quite obviously snubbed you, I wouldn't worry.
yoda57us
03-18-2008, 01:31 PM
Or... I mean you could send a message saying that you would like to meet up in her club and that you might not spend any money on her. That might be funny.
^^^
Dude - I actually got one of those once.
Oh Jenny, I'm sure he would have at least bought you a drink....who knows, you might have even become friends...
yoda57us
03-18-2008, 01:34 PM
I will never judge you my sweet dove. Come, come to Texas, where I will smother you in barbeque sauce and love. }:D
Whoa...Now THAT is a mental picture. *sigh* :)
-gen
Me likey barbecue...;D
hockeybobby
03-18-2008, 04:38 PM
I think I'll just forget about it. It was just an idea that popped into my head. I like to get out and meet people, talk, and socialize (however, I have no plans on opening up that side of my life here, in fact, I've probably already said to much in some threads). Trying to figure out how to not look stalkerish or like a perv would just be too hard.
Joe
Best way to not look stalkerish is to simply add a disclaimer at the bottom of your pm saying: P.S. Not Stalking
I've done this.
GenWar
03-18-2008, 04:47 PM
Actually, gen, and I might be mistaken, you saw one of the pinkie DJ's, correct? No need to say who it was. Unlike dancers, DJ's are often tied to their booth most of the night. When they do get short breaks, they might want to go smoke or shit, or what have you.
Unless he quite obviously snubbed you, I wouldn't worry.
Yeah, I wasn't worried about it at all. Be it busyness or just not wanting to abandon anonymity, it didn't happen. You know me...if there was any room at all to take it personal or worry about it ad infinitum, I'd be right there. But, it really wasn't a big deal.
-gen
Bob_Loblaw
03-18-2008, 06:32 PM
Well - I was more puzzled than offended (like "what? Why would I do that?"). And I moved on to amused pretty quick.
So THAT's why you never returned my PM
JoeUnCool
03-18-2008, 06:51 PM
Best way to not look stalkerish is to simply add a disclaimer at the bottom of your pm saying: P.S. Not Stalking
I've done this.
Actually, that sounds quite like the line "I'll respect you in the morning."
Best way to not look stalkerish is to simply add a disclaimer at the bottom of your pm saying: P.S. Not Stalking
I've done this.
hb, you only get away with that because you are a really nice guy and have an honest demeanor...and you are Canadian. The rest of us are damned before we get started. The ladies know we are pervs ;)
FBR
All Good Things
03-18-2008, 10:29 PM
bwhahaha...as much as i've seen these girls shill. best practices, my ass.
Best practices still dictate that you do not PM directly to one specific dancer independently and without previous contact on the topic of visiting her at her club. Posting a general inquiry about clubs in a particular city, as described by Kat and JZ, is harmless and if a dancer wants to respond to you privately, then that's her choice.
If you are getting hammered by PMs from dancers to come visit them in their individual clubs -- shilling, as it were -- well, join the crowd. I mean, seriously.
I confess that when I wrote the phrase "best practices" my focus was more on PMs that are unrelated to "meeting an SW girl at her club," which I thought was clear from the rest of my post, although I regret that I did not make that clear, particularly given the last paragraph in the post. I was focusing on PMs that are more, er, social in nature. Those involving no exchange of money at all. Those unrelated to meeting a dancer at her club at all. By their very nature, this eliminates "shilliing" as a primary drive. At least as it's commonly understood.
Nope, no clue who that is.
Well, I did not identify her for obvious reasons. She'll self-identify if she so chooses.
hockeybobby
03-19-2008, 08:06 AM
hb, you only get away with that because you are a really nice guy and have an honest demeanor...and you are Canadian. The rest of us are damned before we get started. The ladies know we are pervs ;)
FBR
Hey FBR, I've seen far too little of you lately on SW. You must be working your ass off, or playing real hard.
You know, a lot of the long time male contributors on SW are savvy SC goers who totally know the score about how to treat a dancer in the club. I would have thought that getting a pm from an SW dude that they'd like to come and see you at your club would be a welcome thing. Kind of like "score...I got a sure thing coming to see me...I'll be paid well, and treated likewise". The bonus being you get to meet a sort of pen-pal...provided the dude hasn't been posting garbage incessantly.
Am I being naive here?
JoeUnCool
03-19-2008, 09:32 AM
Hey FBR, I've seen far too little of you lately on SW. You must be working your ass off, or playing real hard.
You know, a lot of the long time male contributors on SW are savvy SC goers who totally know the score about how to treat a dancer in the club. I would have thought that getting a pm from an SW dude that they'd like to come and see you at your club would be a welcome thing. Kind of like "score...I got a sure thing coming to see me...I'll be paid well, and treated likewise". The bonus being you get to meet a sort of pen-pal...provided the dude hasn't been posting garbage incessantly.
Am I being naive here?
Personally, I think you are being naive on this issue. While it might sound like fun to go and hang out, it rarely is. I find the setting uncomfortable. I have gone to SCs with fellow speakers. The problem is that we don't really know each other, so EVERYONE is nervous about talking to the first girl. I have one friend that is a fellow speaker that he and SC veteran. He and I are the only ones that get along in that group and are mostly comfortable with handing out at an SC together. Even then, it can be uncomfortable.
FBR strikes me as a lone wolf, meaning that he goes out by himself and operates on his own. I doubt that anyone else would be welcome in that environment. BTW, thats not my being critical of him just my guess from reading his posts. Personally, I operate as a lone wolf for the most part. Rarely do I allow others to go along with me that are not serious SC veterans that understand how SCs operate with regards to customers. Groups of newbies are just not fun to go with.
Joe
hockeybobby
03-19-2008, 10:40 AM
Joe: I don't think I would likely pm a dude here and ask him if he wanted to go to a strip club with me. That just doesn't sit right with me. If there was a get together of a bunch of SWers, guys and gals...I'm in for that. But sort of making a date with a dude to go to a SC? ew.
I'd do that with a dancer...to go meet up with another dancer. That just seems like a funner scenario to me.
Jenny
03-19-2008, 10:49 AM
Well; it's socialization same as anything else. Some guys think well of other guy members and are interested in socializing. I suppose if strip clubbing is something you do like by yourself... like, I can't imagine some of the encounters described here as being particularly conducive to a punch on the shoulder afterwards.
However, my friend - you are being naive. I developed my antipathy to meeting with guys on stripperweb based on two very unenjoyable and superlatively awkward encounters (GenWar told me that I was kind of unfair because they were not active members so I obviously didn't have a good sense of what they were like) that involved actually arguing about mileage with (and I'm serious) quotations from my posts here that he thought placed me under some kind of positive covenant of service. It was embarrassing, unpleasant and a huge waste of time. But other girls have had more luck and are more open to it.
JoeUnCool
03-19-2008, 11:41 AM
Joe: I don't think I would likely pm a dude here and ask him if he wanted to go to a strip club with me. That just doesn't sit right with me. If there was a get together of a bunch of SWers, guys and gals...I'm in for that. But sort of making a date with a dude to go to a SC? ew.
Ok, you had me worried there. :)
I'd do that with a dancer...to go meet up with another dancer. That just seems like a funner scenario to me.
It would depend on the situation. For me, I could fall over drunk with Mother Teresa or Rachel and have $5,000 in my pocket and know that in the morning, I'd still have $5,000 and they took me in and put me on their couch at their home. I don't have that level of comfort with someone just because I talked to them in a forum online. Heck, I don't have that comfort level with #5 right now and she's been my current fave for 2.5 years. Its not a condemnation of #5 or anyone here, merely the fact that trust and respect are earned, not given.
Joe
hockeybobby
03-19-2008, 11:48 AM
Jenny, you are perfectly entitled to feel the way you do, and draw your conclusions, based on your past experience. It's not a stretch to assume that this kind of thing has happened to other dancers as well. And I suppose also that even a long time member with a good reputation could surprise someone with some douchey behaviour in a SC.
I still feel that it's reasonable to assert that an established SW member will not likely be worse as a customer, than a random dude walking in the door of your club any random evening. In your case though...once bitten, twice shy...dude will need to be doubly reassuring of non-doucheyness.
I mean..the mileage argument with you...that's just so bizarre. I can't relate to it. But every time I log in here, there's a least one "wtf? that shit didn't just happen did it?". It's hard being you Jenny :)
JoeUnCool
03-19-2008, 12:02 PM
I wish I had never started this thread.
Joe
hockeybobby
03-19-2008, 12:13 PM
I wish I had never started this thread.
Joe
Why Joe? It's a good thread...you did good. :D
cinammonkisses
03-19-2008, 12:56 PM
I've met a few SW women but it was always after exchanging several PM's. I tend to let them PM me first once they notice that I am located in their area.
FBR
Oh, you lie, you lie FBR. Everyone knows you've been stalking me for months now..:)
For me, I woudlnt' mind meeting customers from SW. As long as they realize (hopefully they have been well-trained ala pink side) that I am here to work and make money. I don't want anyone (male SW blue-side members included) to wasting my time talking, and not spending money on me when I could be getting it from someone else.
hockeybobby
03-19-2008, 01:15 PM
Oh, you lie, you lie FBR. Everyone knows you've been stalking me for months now..:)
For me, I woudlnt' mind meeting customers from SW. As long as they realize (hopefully they have been well-trained ala pink side) that I am here to work and make money. I don't want anyone (male SW blue-side members included) to wasting my time talking, and not spending money on me when I could be getting it from someone else.
haha...a guy thinking he's gonna get a free pass with a dancer because he signed up on a message board...especially a seasoned member...well he needs to be told off in no uncertain terms.
It would be interesting to hear some of the girls describe the ideal SW member encounter at their club...if nothing more than to hammer home how these things should go down.
JoeUnCool
03-19-2008, 01:42 PM
Why Joe? It's a good thread...you did good. :D
For me, I woudlnt' mind meeting customers from SW. As long as they realize (hopefully they have been well-trained ala pink side) that I am here to work and make money. I don't want anyone (male SW blue-side members included) to wasting my time talking, and not spending money on me when I could be getting it from someone else.
HB, I think that cinammonkisses brings up one of the issues. I want to go into a club and see what a girl looks like. Heck, if I'm not attracted to her, I'm not paying. I don't want to waste her time or mine in an awkward situation.
Another issue is my anonymity.
I had not thought through the entire process when I made my initial post. Now that I have, it just doesn't work.
Joe
JoeUnCool
03-19-2008, 01:48 PM
It would be interesting to hear some of the girls describe the ideal SW member encounter at their club...if nothing more than to hammer home how these things should go down.
It would sound something like "You horrible guy. Give me all your money NOW!" ;)
Joe
cinammonkisses
03-19-2008, 02:17 PM
haha...a guy thinking he's gonna get a free pass with a dancer because he signed up on a message board...
Well, hopefully "getting a free pass" woudln't be their intentions. I think alot of members (male and female) look at eachother as friends. And maybe, not knowingly want to "hang out" while we're at work. I think they lose sight that yes we are at work.
Oh, you lie, you lie FBR. Everyone knows you've been stalking me for months now..:)
Hahaha of course. But only because you are so damn attractive. It is all your fault, young lady :P
FBR
mr_punk
03-19-2008, 05:26 PM
Best practices still dictate that you do not PM directly to one specific dancer independently and without previous contact on the topic of visiting her at her club. Posting a general inquiry about clubs in a particular city, as described by Kat and JZ, is harmless and if a dancer wants to respond to you privately, then that's her choice.LOL..whatever. i'll defer to your considerable expertise on proper perv etiquette on a stripper's MB.
I confess that when I wrote the phrase "best practices" my focus was more on PMs that are unrelated to "meeting an SW girl at her club," which I thought was clear from the rest of my post, although I regret that I did not make that clear, particularly given the last paragraph in the post. I was focusing on PMs that are more, er, social in nature. Those involving no exchange of money at all. Those unrelated to meeting a dancer at her club at all. By their very nature, this eliminates "shilliing" as a primary drive. At least as it's commonly understood.oh, no worries about TMI, TOO. i usually tune out when PLs begin to ramble about the grandiose wonders of a relationship with a stripper replete with mental health and unresolved daddy issues.
HB, I think that cinammonkisses brings up one of the issues. I want to go into a club and see what a girl looks like. Heck, if I'm not attracted to her, I'm not paying. I don't want to waste her time or mine in an awkward situation.huh? you haven't PM these girls for pics yet? what kind of lazy perv are you? slacker.
Am I being naive here?<double-take> LOL..is this guy for real?