View Full Version : dumb and slutty vs smart and proper
UtahMike
07-11-2008, 11:51 PM
I prefer flirty and cuddly. And I just LOVE to be the next customer after the guy who insulted a dancer by assuming she was stupid.
threlayer
07-12-2008, 01:03 PM
I like smart and slutty. Dumb and/or proper doesn't do it for me. But I am always contra it seems. If she's dumb, it will work better if she doesn't talk much at all.
CinammonGirl
07-13-2008, 11:23 AM
Maybe the smart and pretty girl working as a stripper shocks them, so that's something they don't want to deal with..They probably expect strippers to be dumb and ditzy.
I prefer professional and proper strippers ,but I'm also a girl.
Maddie
07-15-2008, 01:39 AM
I despise when guys claim they want an intelligent woman but don't really mean it. From my experience, both inside and outside of the SC, when men say they want an intelligent woman (outside the club, non strippers), they mean they want a gal who knows a thing or two about SOMETHING, and can carry a decent convo. and not look completely vacant too often. INSIDE the club, when they say they want intelligence, they really mean that they want us to be coherent enough to look doe-eyed at their amazing business wiles, all the while adding in commentary including, but not limited to; "wow", "neat", "I would love to own/start a business too - maybe selling cookies/cakes from home, a strip club, real estate, a bar, etc."
These factors are REGARDLESS of the slutty/fun/boring/crazy/lame factors, which throw in an entire array of additional subcategories and customer reactions, wants, & needs.
What they are NOT looking for is a girl who uses words they don't understand, or seems to know too much about the business they are talking about. All too often (for them, not me), men discuss confidential business affairs amongst one another thinking we won't understand, remember, or pay attention. The second you chime in too much about it makes them feel uncomfortable in that (if sober enough) they may get themselves into trouble/and or does not make them look like "THE BIG MAN ON CAMPUS" to their buddies when a titty dancer knows the same stuff "BIG BOSS MAN" knows. That said, I personally LOVE it when guys talk shoppe. I'm like a sponge - I not only want their money, but their information to. Stock tips, info. on gas prices, businesses getting ready for their IPO, or even a local restaurant having a run through.
It's very true, that oftentimes when you seem "too smart" it's because you aren't "fun" enough, but it's also because it's off-putting. When a man expects X, Y, & Z and he's paying for it, he wants to get what he is looking for (and maybe a little more). To us, we think "Why wouldn't a guy want a MENSA girl from Yale with big titties and great grinding abilities combined with flexibility and a fun attitude?", but to them, it's THE most off-putting thing ever. You want to be unattainable, not "Oh my god you should be my wife/business partner/secretary/mistress".
On the other hand, if you want to go "Sugar Daddy Hunting" outside the club for a man to marry, then divorce for 50% of assets later, then perhaps the aforementioned "perfect girl" approach will work.
Otherwise, in the club, "perfect girl" means whatever the guy wants it to mean, NOT what women think it should mean.
(I think I also just explained Lesbian's... I know I'd marry a gal who had brains, a body, and a fun attitude! It's like, with no penis, there's no ego issues or inferiority issues!)
Robertjordan
07-15-2008, 06:58 AM
I like smart and slutty. Dumb and/or proper doesn't do it for me. But I am always contra it seems. If she's dumb, it will work better if she doesn't talk much at all.
I'm the same way. I really like intelligence, especially paired with sexiness. Maybe that's a better word than slutty. Someone who can combine smarts with being a slut in a subtle way gets me excited just thinking about it. I had a girlfriend like that once. Not a dancer, but high IQ and flirty in a sexual kind of way. Very hot.
UtahMike
07-15-2008, 10:46 AM
Actually, using an advanced big words that others in the conversation do not understand is rather poor manners. The only time that is appropriate is when a child is present and you want to say something without the child understanding. To do so with a peer would be indecorous and condescending, neither erudite nor felicitous, and to do so with an intellectually inferior individual would be condescending.
Lysondra
07-15-2008, 10:49 AM
Actually, using an advanced big words that others in the conversation do not understand is rather poor manners. The only time that is appropriate is when a child is present and you want to say something without the child understanding. To do so with a peer would be indecorous and condescending, neither erudite nor felicitous, and to do so with an intellectually inferior individual would be condescending.
*giggles* Your humour, I gots it.
Maddie
07-15-2008, 07:55 PM
wah-wah.
msonyxorb
07-16-2008, 02:59 AM
I despise when guys claim they want an intelligent woman but don't really mean it. From my experience, both inside and outside of the SC, when men say they want an intelligent woman (outside the club, non strippers), they mean they want a gal who knows a thing or two about SOMETHING, and can carry a decent convo. and not look completely vacant too often. INSIDE the club, when they say they want intelligence, they really mean that they want us to be coherent enough to look doe-eyed at their amazing business wiles, all the while adding in commentary including, but not limited to; "wow", "neat", "I would love to own/start a business too - maybe selling cookies/cakes from home, a strip club, real estate, a bar, etc."
These factors are REGARDLESS of the slutty/fun/boring/crazy/lame factors, which throw in an entire array of additional subcategories and customer reactions, wants, & needs.
What they are NOT looking for is a girl who uses words they don't understand, or seems to know too much about the business they are talking about. All too often (for them, not me), men discuss confidential business affairs amongst one another thinking we won't understand, remember, or pay attention. The second you chime in too much about it makes them feel uncomfortable in that (if sober enough) they may get themselves into trouble/and or does not make them look like "THE BIG MAN ON CAMPUS" to their buddies when a titty dancer knows the same stuff "BIG BOSS MAN" knows. That said, I personally LOVE it when guys talk shoppe. I'm like a sponge - I not only want their money, but their information to. Stock tips, info. on gas prices, businesses getting ready for their IPO, or even a local restaurant having a run through.
It's very true, that oftentimes when you seem "too smart" it's because you aren't "fun" enough, but it's also because it's off-putting. When a man expects X, Y, & Z and he's paying for it, he wants to get what he is looking for (and maybe a little more). To us, we think "Why wouldn't a guy want a MENSA girl from Yale with big titties and great grinding abilities combined with flexibility and a fun attitude?", but to them, it's THE most off-putting thing ever. You want to be unattainable, not "Oh my god you should be my wife/business partner/secretary/mistress".
On the other hand, if you want to go "Sugar Daddy Hunting" outside the club for a man to marry, then divorce for 50% of assets later, then perhaps the aforementioned "perfect girl" approach will work.
Otherwise, in the club, "perfect girl" means whatever the guy wants it to mean, NOT what women think it should mean.
(I think I also just explained Lesbian's... I know I'd marry a gal who had brains, a body, and a fun attitude! It's like, with no penis, there's no ego issues or inferiority issues!)
Eh...people who use big words are usually anything BUT intelligent. Same with people who brag about how much they read. If you have to constantly SHOW that you are intelligent, then chances are you probably aren't that smart.
Maddie
07-16-2008, 03:56 AM
*shrugs*, okay, how often do you hear a stripper say "Sorry, I gesticulate a lot" after spilling a drink? Or "Well, yes, I'm from New York, but it's UPSTATE NY, so the vernacular is a little different than people who were raised in the City" (when discussing my lack of a "New York" accent and the "strange" words that I tend to use).
It isn't me trying to prove anything, it's just how I speak naturally. They aren't terribly or uncommon words, and yet in both those situations, I had customers kind of awkwardly stare at me afterwards.
Once, I even said sarcastically, whilst rolling my eyes "Oh, yeah, THAT'S the kind of guy I'd like to procreate with!". For me that term was best suited because it sort of makes it sound mechanical. It wasn't making love to make babies, or fucking an accidentally getting pregnant, it was sort of this concept of planning to make babies with this asshat of a guy. It wasn't so much the "unusual" word choice for me as much as that, to me, it clearly conveyed that it would be some dry, boring thing to make babies with said lame person.
Maddie
07-16-2008, 03:57 AM
And p.s. I need to stop reading this stuff after work. As if being at work 6-12 hours each day isn't enough!
msonyxorb
07-17-2008, 03:27 AM
*shrugs*, okay, how often do you hear a stripper say "Sorry, I gesticulate a lot" after spilling a drink? Or "Well, yes, I'm from New York, but it's UPSTATE NY, so the vernacular is a little different than people who were raised in the City" (when discussing my lack of a "New York" accent and the "strange" words that I tend to use).
It isn't me trying to prove anything, it's just how I speak naturally. They aren't terribly or uncommon words, and yet in both those situations, I had customers kind of awkwardly stare at me afterwards.
Once, I even said sarcastically, whilst rolling my eyes "Oh, yeah, THAT'S the kind of guy I'd like to procreate with!". For me that term was best suited because it sort of makes it sound mechanical. It wasn't making love to make babies, or fucking an accidentally getting pregnant, it was sort of this concept of planning to make babies with this asshat of a guy. It wasn't so much the "unusual" word choice for me as much as that, to me, it clearly conveyed that it would be some dry, boring thing to make babies with said lame person.
If someone spoke to me like that, I would think they have problems and are desperately trying to prove themselves to be intelligent. The second sentence does not sound odd, vernacular is a pretty commonly used word, (it actually took me a while to figure out what was off about that sentence) but using the word "gesticulate" just sounds awkward and it kind of sounds like you are making fun of the person you are talking to. Like someone else said, smart people talk at the level of the person they are conversing with. If you are smart you probably know several synonyms for those words and therefore do not need to use the most impressive version of it.
Procreate also isn't a big word....
I could understand customers staring at gesticulate though
threlayer
07-17-2008, 06:30 AM
It is true to an extent that using a big vocabulary in an inappropriate setting is often a sign of pretentiouness, not of intelligence. I can visualize (stereotypically) a guy thinking of a dancer falling for his pretentiousness and going home with him after hours. But with all the exposure to strangeness that a dancer gets, I don't see that a vocabulary as useful in that crass way.
An intelligent person may talk about everyday things in a unique and creative way, or present an insightful alternative way of looking at something normally considered mundane, or have a quick mind (as in humorous), or in other ways that make her/him stand out. It's hard for me to define intelligence but I know it when I see it.
I've met some intelligent dancers, actually a lot of them, and dances with them usually are interesting and witty. It seems there is more to being with them than just the smile and the grinding. And not one of them has uttered the fake 'turn-on' sounds that are so off-putting to me.
Otoki
07-18-2008, 10:17 AM
I despise when guys claim they want an intelligent woman but don't really mean it. From my experience, both inside and outside of the SC, when men say they want an intelligent woman (outside the club, non strippers), they mean they want a gal who knows a thing or two about SOMETHING, and can carry a decent convo. and not look completely vacant too often. INSIDE the club, when they say they want intelligence, they really mean that they want us to be coherent enough to look doe-eyed at their amazing business wiles, all the while adding in commentary including, but not limited to; "wow", "neat", "I would love to own/start a business too - maybe selling cookies/cakes from home, a strip club, real estate, a bar, etc."
+a million
And the expected stripper responses were hilarious in their accuracy.
Otoki
07-18-2008, 10:25 AM
*shrugs*, okay, how often do you hear a stripper say "Sorry, I gesticulate a lot" after spilling a drink?
*raises hand* guilty.
I've only run into the vocab problem a few times. I always simplify my speech when speaking to people for whom English is not their native language. I always ask someone for a definition when they use a word I don't understand. I also don't use unusual vocab (in my opinion) when speaking because simpler words with fewer syllables do the job. When I write a paper I try to make my point in as concise a manner as possible. Sometimes that requires an unusual word that combines the meanings of many simpler words more accurately. Sometimes that requires a commonly used word with few syllables.
I definitely get my hackles up when people are using high-syllable words in conversation with a complete stranger when simple ones would do. However, there are definitely times where a more scientific/complex word (like "procreate") gets the idea across more accurately.
Otoki
07-18-2008, 10:26 AM
And not one of them has uttered the fake 'turn-on' sounds that are so off-putting to me.
I am so happy to have found one customer who doesn't like those sounds. I now feel much better about my dances.;D
bsteve
07-18-2008, 11:19 PM
I despise when guys claim they want an intelligent woman but don't really mean it. ...
I understand what you are saying, but if all that a guy wants a woman with big boobs, or pretty face, what do you think that he should claim? "I want a woman with big boobs!"? "All that I am interested in is her looks?" From the balance of your post, I can well imagine what you would say to say a guy.
So, of course that a guy is going to claim that he wants a woman that is intelligent. Even if intelligence is secondary.
CinammonGirl
07-20-2008, 01:52 AM
To do so with a peer would be indecorous and condescending, neither erudite nor felicitous, and to do so with an intellectually inferior individual would be condescending.
Your lexicon just gave me an orgasm.
PoleSiren
04-12-2009, 12:25 PM
I like to start with approachable and classy, let them know I"m intelligent and worth the money and then (based on how I read the customer, of course), I might throw in something a little surprising.
It's like playing with his nipple (or whatever..) at the opera, or a little under the table foot play at a family dinner. Mix in a little "naughty" with the classy. Keep 'em guessing.
PoleSiren
04-12-2009, 12:33 PM
Instead of "I'm so horny" try something simple like "do you want to take to the PD area?" Drop the "you turn me on" part and just go with "let's have some fun!". It's all about selling it to the guy even if you don't believe it yourself.
Totally. And if you still feel like you are lying to them, then just find someting sensual about them, something physical that you do like.
Something I would do:
(leans in close to his neck) mmmmm, you smell amazing...
-puts him in the right state of mind, and brings his attention to how good you smell.
or when the guy is wearing cashmere or something else soft I will make sure I touch his shirt sensually and say something like:
So soft...you would feel so good against my naked skin.
All true...all seductive...all work. Often. 8)
BoxOfPandora
04-12-2009, 12:58 PM
Turn smart into mysterious. Turn classy into teasing and seductive. Hell smart can also be seductive.
I try not to act too smart for most customers, unless I can sense they want an intelligent conversation partner, or a girl with personality. Otherwise I'll just keep my mouth shut beyond basic conversation.
An other trick I picked up is to try to learn a little bit about everything, and find out what the customer is into, so you can talk about it. Then admit you don't know too much but would like to; it makes the custy feel better to know something.
I also like to play on the "Blonds like to have fun, but brunettes do it better" idea.
trephany129
04-13-2009, 12:19 AM
For me, smart, confident, and uninhibited seems to work pretty well...I can hold a conversation on just about anything, and I hint that though I'm "reformed" form my former bad-girl ways, I still have a wild streak that I need to exercise (which is completely true)...I'm subtle about it. I show through words and body language that certain ideas are intriguing to me, but not not necessarily something I would act upon. Sultry, witty and seductive works much better for me than the "blatant sexpot" persona...
lol1337a
04-13-2009, 01:32 AM
I always go with smart and somewhat slutty. I have the vocab problem because I'm an English major and I have to read 8000 pretentious articles a day and talk to 8000 pretentious people. I can't even recognize pretentious words anymore because I'm constantly inundated with them (see!!). I try to work on it, but I've been called pretentious a few times and get some blank stares. Because of this, I compensate by seeming more slutty than I actually am. I don't grind, but I give very sensual dances and initiate legal dirty talk once in a while -- made up stories about what I like, my fantasies, crazy sexual experiences, etc. I ask about theirs too. Many guys love talking about their fantasies with a half naked girl in their lap! It seems to work pretty well for me in terms of money, but I've never tried anything different.
My pretentiousness has worked to my advantage at least once though. I have a reg who pays me very well to edit his business proposals :)
jack0177057
04-13-2009, 08:26 AM
I am just totally turned OFF by the dumb act. A few months ago, I went to the club with my co-workers and a "dumb" dancer came to our table. One of the guys did get a lap dance, but I could not stand the act... Obviously, this dancer was not dumb, but, she put on a little girl's voice and acted REALLY dumb... It was somewhat entertaining,... even amusing,... but definitely, not sexy,... at least not for me... I would not have accepted a free lap dance from her, even though she was very pretty, because, she was talking and acting like a 13-year old... I much prefer the "intellectual stripper" type or the "artist stripper" type...
firemaiden04
04-13-2009, 12:00 PM
From what I've seen at my club, the intelligent thing attracts the guys with a lot of money. The gross white trash guys with half their teeth are the ones that are put off by intelligence, and they're the ones who tip really, really shitty and whip out $5 after a private dance, acting like they're being sooo generous. All the guys who spend a lot of money on me usually do it just for sitting with them having a conversation (our club doesn't have a real champagne room)--and you kind of have to be intelligent to do that. The really stupid chicks at my club can't pull it off and can't get any money off the high rollers.