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MissMynxx
05-19-2009, 02:25 PM
How much of her support do you provide, do you cohabit and what is the age difference? Inquiring minds want to know.

I'm gonna chime in here, since I'm Almost Jaded's girlfriend. ;D I think I'm qualified to answer your questions...

As far as support goes, I'm assuming you mean financially. We're pretty much like any other couple where both parties have 'normal' jobs - we split the bills fairly. If you meant something else, feel free to ask. We takes turns paying for nights out on the town (though he NEVER lets me pay for dinner, lol), and I buy my own gas, cigarettes, etc; and pay for my own "luxury" expenses and work expenses like my hair and nails.

We do cohabit, we've lived together for a solid 4 months, though during the first 2 I was practically living there. The club I worked at was just down the street from his house, and my apartment was across town. Just made more sense, lol.

Our age difference is pretty substantial - about 13 years. He's the older one, though I'm sure you guessed that. It's easily the best and strongest relationship I've ever been in. I'm so grateful that I broke every stripper rule in the book and pursued him. ;D

seekr34
05-19-2009, 07:30 PM
From what I heard and read from strippers and former strippers is, boys are hard to keep, most brag during early stages and then they get possessive and jealous. I never understood that. The girl hasn't changed. Me, I thought about it before and I still have the same thoughts. If my girlfriend was a stripper, I'd be turned on all the time. ;)

Earl_the_Pearl
05-19-2009, 09:25 PM
From what I heard and read from strippers and former strippers is, boys are hard to keep, most brag during early stages and then they get possessive and jealous. I never understood that. The girl hasn't changed. Me, I thought about it before and I still have the same thoughts. If my girlfriend was a stripper, I'd be turned on all the time. ;)

The only man that doesn't care that his women is a dancer is one that is living off her or he can remain emotionally detached from not just her job but from her.

Almost Jaded
05-20-2009, 10:48 AM
The only man that doesn't care that his women is a dancer is one that is living off her or he can remain emotionally detached from not just her job but from her.

*resist urge to tear into you in a way you can't comprehend*

*take deep breaths*

*okay, now might be safe to type...*

Where do I start? Maybe with a question. Where exactly do you get the gumption to make such patently asinine and blanket statement like that? Seriously?

I hate to break it to you, but not all people share your views about (morality, relationships, security/insecurity, and on and on and on). Some people can date or even marry someone (man or woman) who works as an exotic dancer and not have a worry in the world related to their significant others profession. Some people marry women (or men) who work in brothels and have no problem with it. Just because you can't wrap your brain around that doesn't mean that your (moral convictions, insecurities, other preconceptions and OPINIONS) apply to every other man in a given situation.

So to re-answer what my darling girlfriend already did and extrapolate a little further in response to the obtuse comments following her response:

I make far more money than MissMynxx does. I ask that she contribute to the household expenses and cover a few of her own. I do not by any stretch of the imagination live off of her, unless you want to say that by her contributing I have a little more expendable income?

As for emotional detachment... FOFLMFAO I don't know if there's any point in trying to eplain something that is obviously a difference of fundmental base emotions and beliefs - Theres almost no chance of "convincing" you of aything. Suffice it to say that I am the diametric opposite of emotionally detached from her - or tha last dancer I dated, which lasted 5 years and fell apart for reasons having nothing whatsoever to do with stripping or anyhing related. Nor am I detached from her job - I actively help her pick outfits and music, work on her look, and whenI'm in the club I do everything in my ability to helpwith her hussle - pointing out guys that seem to like her, giving her tips on how she looked on stage or that she neglected one group or another who looked as though they held back on tips as a result; even bustng her chops whe she doesn't feel like going in and other girls text to tell her a regular is there lookig for her. Just like she tells me when she's met someone (at work or ANYWHERE) that's a potential business contact or fellow auto afficianado.

You are entitled to your opinions, beliefs, and thoughts. Please refrain from applying them to ME - whether by design or simple incidental inclusion. From my standpoint, you are wrong in ways you can't even fathom.

Earl_the_Pearl
05-20-2009, 10:59 AM
You are entitled to your opinions, beliefs, and thoughts. Please refrain from applying them to ME - whether by design or simple incidental inclusion. From my standpoint, you are wrong in ways you can't even fathom.
True, I will restate.
The vast majority of men will not be able to have a stable relationship with a dancer.

You have a dancer centric view and way of stating the situation.

Bluegrassgirl
05-20-2009, 11:18 AM
A-fucking-men Morgan :) That was an excellent thing you did.

My hub and I have learned genuine trust in each other through some rough and tumble times. He knew me pre-strip days...and frankly isn't surprised that I got involved.

As for dating, people still learning about each other, still learning to trust each other...I think education and understanding are KEY...

And remember however your partner reacts to your stripping career, they will react in similar ways in future stories you share together...decide if you can handle that or not.

Bluegrassgirl
05-20-2009, 11:26 AM
You are entitled to your opinions, beliefs, and thoughts. Please refrain from applying them to ME - whether by design or simple incidental inclusion. From my standpoint, you are wrong in ways you can't even fathom.[/quote]...

Agreed, Almost Jaded...very cool/supportive of you.

To further support your point:

Not everyone has the god-fearing monogamous rules laid down in stone for marriage that others do, especially Christians. I am not trying to bash Christians--it just seems that they have this nearly fantasy idea of what marriage is, and they expect to bend reality and their partner around their shortcomings with possessiveness, jealousy, neediness, etc.

There are as many marriages, customs, and ways of life as their are people.

There is no one right way to live.

jack0177057
05-20-2009, 11:44 AM
True, I will restate.
The vast majority of men will not be able to have a stable relationship with a dancer.

You have a dancer centric view and way of stating the situation.

I respect Almost Jaded and I could see myself being "cool" with the idea of a stripper GF like him, but I have to agree with Earl that most guys can't deal with it... The idea of having to "share" a girlfriend with strangers, albeit in a physical and not emotional way, must be somewhat emasculating to the average American male... Specially after hearing all the complaints on this forum... I would want to kill half of her custies... The problem is three-fold: (1) the insecurity that she might actually be enjoying herself with a custie (emotional cheating), (2) the insecurity that she might cheat on you for money (physical cheating), and (3) the indignation that custies might be disrespecting her (and you by extension). To some extent, you have these fears wherever your GF works, but it is magnified 100X in a SC.

I think, as a BF, you would almost have to develop a dancer's mindset and put money above everything else... Which is easier for a poor man to do...

On the other hand, I'm 36 and I've already lived through my most possessive, insecure and jealousy-filled years. Jealousy has never brought me anything but frustration... I think I could see a dancer GF as a savy business woman, and put everything else in that context... As I've said before though, she'd have to have ambition that involves something beyond stripping, like getting a college degree or advanced degree or starting a business...

DEE_K
05-20-2009, 01:11 PM
I think that it is impossible to predict what someone's reaction to being told you are a stripper would be, as everyone is different. Although it certainly seems to be much more acceptable these days, especially among the younger generations.

As an aside, the way this whole thing got turned around at some point in the thread (about whether dancers would date customers) struck me as so stupid. In order to clarify why it was stupid, I've decided to rewrite the situation using another profession where people can make lots of money, but also has stigma associated with it: lawyers.

So, lets suppose that there is a forum for lawyers to go to where they can anonymously complain about the stress they suffer, the hours they work, the stigma they face, whatever. And then one of them posts about "I'm a lawyer: turn on or turn off?" Then suppose that some PL lawyer junkie posted back about "turning the situation around" by asking them about how they refuse to date clients. It would make absolutely no sense, right? It's a personal relationship vs. a business relationship, and I doubt the topic would get much play. Since many of the customers on here obviously share some sort of obsession/fascination with strippers (spending hours daily on a forum for professionals in a business in which they are not involved) it makes sense the question got turned around that way. This does not change that it makes no sense.

Also, I would have no issue dating a male stipper, I would never date a customer. This does not make me a hypocrite, refusing to mix business with pleasure is acceptable in every other business.

Earl_the_Pearl
05-20-2009, 01:12 PM
I respect Almost Jaded and I could see myself being "cool" with the idea of a stripper GF like him, but I have to agree with Earl that most guys can't deal with it...

I think, as a BF, you would almost have to develop a dancer's mindset and put money above everything else... Which is easier for a poor man to do...


By poor man you mean one that lives off the earnings of a dancer.

It was said by one that knows.

Actually, these days, private dance area touching is expected in the vast majority of cities. What average man could let his women do that for a living?

Earl_the_Pearl
05-20-2009, 01:14 PM
.... I've decided to rewrite the situation using another profession where people can make lots of money, but also has stigma associated with it: lawyers.


Is that a lawyer joke? I love lawyer jokes. ;D

gradpsych
05-20-2009, 03:28 PM
The only man that doesn't care that his women is a dancer is one that is living off her or he can remain emotionally detached from not just her job but from her.



From reading this it got me thinking about my take on this subject.

If I were dating a dancer I would totally support her as a good, honest girlfriend/partner would. As long as she is happy, healthy and enjoys dancing I don't see what is wrong with it. But I will say I would not show up at her work. One I have no buissness there, that is her work place just like she wouldn't come waltsing into my work. Two I would feel a little uncomfortable with her FLIRTING, not the dancing but flirting.

I can totally see WHY you would say, "remain emotionally detached" but that is not so for everyone. Just because I could handle it, and you can't, means I trust her. I trust that she want's to be with me. It means I'm proud that she can get up there and "show off" where most men would love to have a girlfriend that agressive and beautifull. ;)

The only thing I don't like about you posting this was that your basically telling me, and others in my opinion, that we don't/wouldn't care about what our girlfriends are doing. We do care, but not in the way that would make me terminate the relationship.

Crow2
05-20-2009, 07:39 PM
What average man could let his women do that for a living?


This is said by one that knows .. "let" as in allow, permit, and so forth. And the typical male chauvinistic train of thought rears it's ugly head. You are allowed this..

I date a non average man. He is ordinary to everyone but me. Ordinary but not typical. He knows what I do and accepts it. He knew my chosen profession when we first met.

See above commentary for "average" thinking.

Any healthy relationship is built on give and take. Not dictatorship, or "letting" ones partner do something.

I don't broadcast what I do for a living because I do not feel the need to deal with other individuals baggage. Again, see above quote.
They can either accept it and be my friend, or not like it and go away.
My job does not define me. It is simply my job.



The only man that doesn't care that his women is a dancer is one that is living off her or he can remain emotionally detached from not just her job but from her.


Again, your commentary is simply offensive and for lack of a better term.. uninformed.
Yes, there are men that live off of their dancer SO's.. then again, not everyone works that way and your ignorant blanket statement lumps all of us in with a train of thought that is antiquated and belongs in the dark ages. Not every dancer is as dumb as the ones you are use to dealing with.

Almost Jaded
05-20-2009, 11:39 PM
Crow2 and others - :)

Earl... this is why I made the statements regarding there being no point in trying to convince you of anything. People have fundamental differences in core beliefs, and even more so in how the opinions they evelop through education and life experience affect those beliefs, and even MORE so how they apply those beliefs and opinions to their lives. I appreciate your amending your statement, and I believe (see above, lol) your amended version to be very accurate - though I think (see above statement) that you and I could debate for years on how and why we arrived at such an opinion and what it means. As for my views being "dancer-centric" - well, firstly - what did you expect?! LOL I'm in a wonderful and deeply fulfilling relationship with a dancer! And this isn't the first one, either! And no, I don't go looking to date dancers - just sorta turned out that way the first time, and MissMynxx and I connected because she flat refused to take no for an answer, lol.

Regarding comments that followed from many different posters - I think that upbringing and religious beliefs have far less to do with it than one might suspect. I will use myself as an example, only because I'm a good one and I'm fairly familiar with the details, lol.

Upper-middle class family and fairly wealthy extended family (but a BIG family, so it doesn't add up to much split that many ways, lol). Brought up in a deeply christian but comparatively open-minded household with many children, of which I am the eldest. I am very intelligent, well if not formally educated (no patience for college, tried a number of times and had a scholorship that regretfully went unused). Wasn't a SC regular at all until a few years back. Somewhere along teh line decided I liked the atmosphere and really enjoyed myself at these places, and started going regularly to several, with or without my GF at the time - who had previously danced before us dating, escorted breifly when we were first dating, and danced again off and on during our relationship. I'm an on and off regular still, whether or not I'm dating a dancer.

So how did I end up spending so much time in these dens of iniquity? Why do so many other "regular", "upstanding" guys I know also go fairly frequently? WHy aren't all people from "questionable" backgrounds hopeless SC and porn addicts? WHy are the generalizations about people who GO to the clubs - NEVERMIND THE DANCERS (!!!) - that make these questions necessary even in existance?!

Meh - I'm getting long winded, and have a LOT more to say, lol. Read some books. "Stripped" is a GREAT one. I'm an avid reader, mostly fiction - that book was read by my then GF who went on a kick reading all the lit out there about teh biz - I started picking them up. Might help put a dent in some preconceptions, those.

Any relatioship is based on trust and respect. A relationship with a dancer is no different than any other.

Whether you go to her club or not has nothing to do with anything other than your (plural, the two of you) personal comfort level with you observing her in that environment. Personlly - I love every second of it - watching other guys drool in fantasy aout what I KNOW I'm going to be doing with her later, lol. See - the same issues that make some people jealous actually work FOR others. ;)

Oh - and the dancer who said that guys posting on these boards are different than "other" guys. WTF? I'm sure ethe manner in which each of us discovered this forum is as varied as the resons for which we participate. Kinda like the why some girls look down on the biz that others find empowering, and so forth. Stereotype not, oh ye Pot - lest the Kettle call YOU black! ;)

bumrubber
05-21-2009, 05:03 PM
Turn on or turn off? Neither. But it would be a big yellow warning light as far as a relationship goes.

I've dated two strippers. One was a bartender in a restaurant I worked in, the other a classmate in graduate school. Both "had their shit together," at least outwardly - good students, financially responsible, no boozing or drugs, etc. The second one I had a lot in common with, education and career wise, interest and lifestyle wise. We both knew it and tried hard to make it work. But she was too closed off emotionally, and could never get close enough. The first one was hard to get close to as well.

A couple of my friends had stripper girlfriends too - smart, ambitious girls, charming and fun to be around, good students, good other jobs, but were partiers and drama queens with all kinds of personal problems.

So would I date a stripper again? Sure, why not.

worldfamoustoddyepthatguy
05-21-2009, 11:14 PM
If you don't mind I would like to turn this question a little on its head. This might sound like an a-hole type question but it is not intended to be so.

How about if you are a stripper and you encounter a really wealthy customer who enjoys your company and starts to involve you in his life and brings you into his circle of friends. I am referring to the type with a net worth of say more than 50 million and if the question is more effective say more than 200 million whose circle of friends and neighbors are international business magnates, holders of large amounts of real estate, heirs to family fortunes, owners of many restaurants, owners of casinos, famous models, pop singers, you kinda get the picture.

How would you feel socializing with this type of crowd with this guy? Would you feel like you needed to change your profession or would you feel comfortable around super rich people being a stripper?

Crow2
05-21-2009, 11:16 PM
If you don't mind I would like to turn this question a little on its head. This might sound like an a-hole type question but it is not intended to be so.

How about if you are a stripper and you encounter a really wealthy customer who enjoys your company and starts to involve you in his life and brings you into his circle of friends. I am referring to the type with a net worth of say more than 50 million and if the question is more effective say more than 200 million whose circle of friends and neighbors are international business magnates, holders of large amounts of real estate, heirs to family fortunes, owners of many restaurants, owners of casinos, famous models, pop singers, you kinda get the picture.

How would you feel socializing with this type of crowd with this guy? Would you feel like you needed to change your profession or would you feel comfortable around super rich people being a stripper?


I have been - what's your point?

Otoki
05-22-2009, 08:03 AM
If you don't mind I would like to turn this question a little on its head. This might sound like an a-hole type question but it is not intended to be so.

How about if you are a stripper and you encounter a really wealthy customer who enjoys your company and starts to involve you in his life and brings you into his circle of friends. I am referring to the type with a net worth of say more than 50 million and if the question is more effective say more than 200 million whose circle of friends and neighbors are international business magnates, holders of large amounts of real estate, heirs to family fortunes, owners of many restaurants, owners of casinos, famous models, pop singers, you kinda get the picture.

How would you feel socializing with this type of crowd with this guy? Would you feel like you needed to change your profession or would you feel comfortable around super rich people being a stripper?
I don't get what wealthy friends would have to do with how I feel about my job. Perhaps you could articulate your point better.

Crow2
05-22-2009, 08:43 AM
I also don't see what anyone's net worth has to do with anything.

I've met very wealthy people that with one look at them you would never know that they could go to a car dealer, and point out a Bugatti - drop the money in cash and drive it home.

worldfamoustoddyepthatguy
05-22-2009, 09:17 AM
First of all, I was kind of turning the core question around in that it seems the original question was asking how a customer would feel when meeting a person who is a stripper by reversing the question and essentially asking how does the stripper feel introducing herself as a stripper when circulating with groups of people who have so called "regular" jobs.

I added a twist to the subject of the guy being wealthy more out of curiosity than anything else, but with the wonderment knowing that super wealthy people may carry a certain attitude towards the sort of work a person does who is in their midst. Knowing that, would that bother a girl who is a stripper representing herself to that type of people who might be more likely to have a negative opinion BECAUSE the girl is a stripper?
Also, I was reading the other post on how a guy picks up hot women and some people had criticized by saying a person who only wants smoking hot women is shallow then someone mocked a guy who made claims of a certain income below that of many good strippers who was ridiculed for sounding like a predator. Someone asserted that attraction for the girl presents itself in many fashions and a super wealthy person is in many cases credited with an appealing charisma whether resulting from fame, confidence, dominance, good looks, all around good personality and whatever else fall under the rules of attraction. People also choose their partners based on financial or professional success and many a stripper could be the type to believe herself uber financially successful putting herself in a category where she feels she needs a person who is equally successful.

Anyway, a super wealthy guy who uses his brand of charisma to only date really attractive women(possibly strippers) may have a lot to offer in return and for whatever reason in this case a stripper found a super wealthy guy to be the type of guy she feels comfortable with. Does that personal comfort level change when socializing with the people a guy of that caliber is likely to socialize with knowing the that the type of people he circulates with could very well have negative opinions of people associated with the sex industry?

Crow2
05-22-2009, 12:35 PM
First of all, I was kind of turning the core question around in that it seems the original question was asking how a customer would feel when meeting a person who is a stripper by reversing the question and essentially asking how does the stripper feel introducing herself as a stripper when circulating with groups of people who have so called "regular" jobs.

I added a twist to the subject of the guy being wealthy more out of curiosity than anything else, but with the wonderment knowing that super wealthy people may carry a certain attitude towards the sort of work a person does who is in their midst. Knowing that, would that bother a girl who is a stripper representing herself to that type of people who might be more likely to have a negative opinion BECAUSE the girl is a stripper?
Also, I was reading the other post on how a guy picks up hot women and some people had criticized by saying a person who only wants smoking hot women is shallow then someone mocked a guy who made claims of a certain income below that of many good strippers who was ridiculed for sounding like a predator. Someone asserted that attraction for the girl presents itself in many fashions and a super wealthy person is in many cases credited with an appealing charisma whether resulting from fame, confidence, dominance, good looks, all around good personality and whatever else fall under the rules of attraction. People also choose their partners based on financial or professional success and many a stripper could be the type to believe herself uber financially successful putting herself in a category where she feels she needs a person who is equally successful.

Anyway, a super wealthy guy who uses his brand of charisma to only date really attractive women(possibly strippers) may have a lot to offer in return and for whatever reason in this case a stripper found a super wealthy guy to be the type of guy she feels comfortable with. Does that personal comfort level change when socializing with the people a guy of that caliber is likely to socialize with knowing the that the type of people he circulates with could very well have negative opinions of people associated with the sex industry?



Most of the uber rich are assholes. Straight up. Well, let me amend that - the uber rich that are BORN into it. They grow up in a place like The Biltmore and have their entire lives insulated by so much money that nothing can touch them.

It's usually the self made individual, that worked for what he ( or she ) has that looks for the trophy wife or spouse. Shallow? Perhaps - It usually comes from a lifetime of not having, to going to be able to have anything.

I still don't see what wealthy men and strippers ( or sex industry workers ) have to do with anything.
What exactly is it that your trying to say - that strippers/porn stars/escorts are so inept in social settings that it would make them uncomfortable?

Frankly, that's what I'm getting

Otoki
05-23-2009, 07:27 AM
Most of the uber rich are assholes. Straight up. Well, let me amend that - the uber rich that are BORN into it. They grow up in a place like The Biltmore and have their entire lives insulated by so much money that nothing can touch them.

It's usually the self made individual, that worked for what he ( or she ) has that looks for the trophy wife or spouse. Shallow? Perhaps - It usually comes from a lifetime of not having, to going to be able to have anything.

I still don't see what wealthy men and strippers ( or sex industry workers ) have to do with anything.
What exactly is it that your trying to say - that strippers/porn stars/escorts are so inept in social settings that it would make them uncomfortable?

Frankly, that's what I'm getting

I'm getting the sense that this guy thinks strippers should feel inferior to other financially successful people because they get naked for money. He keeps saying that these wealthy people would probably look down in dancing but doesn't really explain how he drew this conclusion.

worldfamoustoddyepthatguy
05-23-2009, 10:35 AM
I pretty much said what I meant. In some groups, and in the point I made I was singling out the super wealthy, people judge people based on different factors. Some super wealthy people congregate with people that in their opinion have achieved great things or accomplished major feats in their jobs.

The last two posts put the blame on me that "I think" strippers should feel inferior and that is not really what I am saying. I have had some experience with some super wealthy people and my impression was that conversations centered around what you have accomplished and what you will accomplish in the near future and what exactly is your job title or maybe more appropriate, what do you own? Nor do I think the grouping that Crow listed is socially inept, but that is actually geting closer to what I was asking.

It is more of a combination of the two. Not necessarily socially inept, but rather uncomfortable in a setting where people might carry negative opinions based on what you do. I don't think this questions your ability to mingle in the crown, I think it questions your desire to hang through possibly an uncomfortably situation. Or if the socializing the super wealthy guy you were hanging out with repeatedly required that you mingle with people who might not like you based on what you did for a living, would that make you want to do something else for a living?

JayATee
05-23-2009, 12:36 PM
I pretty much said what I meant. In some groups, and in the point I made I was singling out the super wealthy, people judge people based on different factors. Some super wealthy people congregate with people that in their opinion have achieved great things or accomplished major feats in their jobs.

The last two posts put the blame on me that "I think" strippers should feel inferior and that is not really what I am saying. I have had some experience with some super wealthy people and my impression was that conversations centered around what you have accomplished and what you will accomplish in the near future and what exactly is your job title or maybe more appropriate, what do you own? Nor do I think the grouping that Crow listed is socially inept, but that is actually geting closer to what I was asking.

It is more of a combination of the two. Not necessarily socially inept, but rather uncomfortable in a setting where people might carry negative opinions based on what you do. I don't think this questions your ability to mingle in the crown, I think it questions your desire to hang through possibly an uncomfortably situation. Or if the socializing the super wealthy guy you were hanging out with repeatedly required that you mingle with people who might not like you based on what you did for a living, would that make you want to do something else for a living?

Nope. If they couldn't handle it, it would be their problem not mine. And if the guy that I was with was fine with it, than it really wouldn't be my problem (which he must be if I'm there in the first place).

The Boob
05-23-2009, 02:12 PM
Since other dongs have already bogged down this topic with the irksome truth that men and women think differently, that frees me up to simply answer the question!

Meeting someone in daylight and hearing that she pole dances is a blend of turn-on and worry and.... "eh, okey doke." Turn on because, in short, your adrenaline starts pumping more. So that's a plus. You've just been given reasonable certainty that the sexy part of the relationship will be in good hands. Worry, because now I have to start watching her more closely for signs of stripper cliches, to protect myself from the pitfalls and stereotypes that have been so well documented on internet sites like this for years. And the last part of my response would be "eh, whatever" because, remember, the vast majority of our lives are spent in the non-sex mode of daily life, so it's that person whom I have to learn to get along with, you know, the one who doesn't wear the 9" shoes and the makeup and the 'buttless' party dress. And like with everyone else, it'll be tougher to get along with her when she isn't hustling. So it's the compatibility thing that's going to define how good the relationship is anyway, and not the stripper thing. Hence, "eh." It's a job. I didn't make a big deal of it when the last woman told me she worked at a furniture store, so I'd try not to make a big deal out of the stripping.

Otoki
05-24-2009, 08:41 AM
I pretty much said what I meant. In some groups, and in the point I made I was singling out the super wealthy, people judge people based on different factors. Some super wealthy people congregate with people that in their opinion have achieved great things or accomplished major feats in their jobs.

The last two posts put the blame on me that "I think" strippers should feel inferior and that is not really what I am saying. I have had some experience with some super wealthy people and my impression was that conversations centered around what you have accomplished and what you will accomplish in the near future and what exactly is your job title or maybe more appropriate, what do you own? Nor do I think the grouping that Crow listed is socially inept, but that is actually geting closer to what I was asking.

It is more of a combination of the two. Not necessarily socially inept, but rather uncomfortable in a setting where people might carry negative opinions based on what you do. I don't think this questions your ability to mingle in the crown, I think it questions your desire to hang through possibly an uncomfortably situation. Or if the socializing the super wealthy guy you were hanging out with repeatedly required that you mingle with people who might not like you based on what you did for a living, would that make you want to do something else for a living?
I think it's strange that your question is whether or not we would be uncomfortable in a hypothetically uncomfortable setting, and yet you made it very specific::)

To answer your question, if I was hanging out with a friend and they constantly hung out with another group who was judgmental about my job, I would try to educate them ONCE, and then just write them off if they couldn't get over their preconceived notions. I don't like hanging out with stupid, close-minded people, and anyone who judged me based on the stereotypes of my job is exactly that.

Almost Jaded
05-25-2009, 11:56 AM
The Boob - Perfect. ;)

gameover
05-25-2009, 03:28 PM
Well, it would be a turn on, since you'd assume the sex would be good. But, I wouldn't want anything long term with one.

JayATee
05-25-2009, 06:55 PM
True, I will restate.
The vast majority of men will not be able to have a stable relationship with a dancer.

You have a dancer centric view and way of stating the situation.

And you have a PL view and PL way of stating the situation.

Sugarmama
05-26-2009, 12:29 AM
Well, it would be a turn on, since you'd assume the sex would be good. But, I wouldn't want anything long term with one.

Honey here is what I tell folks like u you are always paying for it when u have a girlfriend that won't give it up or just lays there like a bump on a log until u take her out more, buy her a new outfit or other goody, or do what she says you are paying for it.

Oh and don't get one that won't work so then u have to support the whole household lol

For all the damn headache you have to deal with right there, you might as well just come on down to the club and give a girl a C-note.

jack0177057
05-26-2009, 12:05 PM
Honey here is what I tell folks like u you are always paying for it when u have a girlfriend that won't give it up or just lays there like a bump on a log until u take her out more, buy her a new outfit or other goody, or do what she says you are paying for it.

Oh and don't get one that won't work so then u have to support the whole household lol

For all the damn headache you have to deal with right there, you might as well just come on down to the club and give a girl a C-note.

I agree with Sugermama... You always pay for it, and to top it all... when you get a divorce you receive a HUGE bill for something you've already paid for many times over.

gameover
05-26-2009, 04:23 PM
Honey here is what I tell folks like u you are always paying for it when u have a girlfriend that won't give it up or just lays there like a bump on a log until u take her out more, buy her a new outfit or other goody, or do what she says you are paying for it.

Oh and don't get one that won't work so then u have to support the whole household lol

For all the damn headache you have to deal with right there, you might as well just come on down to the club and give a girl a C-note.

Yeah, but she's my bump on a log :)

I don't have to worry about guys pawing her all day long. I'd be too jealous if I was dating a dancer in a serious relationship.

Cyril
05-26-2009, 08:12 PM
I think all women are whores except a select few. These select few give you nothing sexual in return. They expect you to buy them expensive necklaces just because they are your wives. As far as sex is concerned; here is what you get:
- I am not going to wear the garter; go get yourself a whore
- No dirty talking. I do not like running commentary
- Penis is for vagina not for ass
- No doggie style. That is uncivlized
- God did not create my mouth to suck penis
- And, blah, blah

Almost Jaded
05-26-2009, 11:47 PM
- I am not going to wear the garter; go get yourself a whore

Well at least she's open minded to that small extent; most wives would take issue with their husband getting a whore. :P

Try before you buy. Granted, this is through the lens of someone who likes watching men paw at his girl all night ("keep dreaming guys, she comes home to me and by the way your nastiest fantasies pale before the unbelievable reality that is her in the sack. By all means continue paying her for her time, she'll definitely keep those dreams going" lol), I not only don't get jealous of my women's pasts, I prefer they have a checkered one, lol. Unlikley to have those prudish hangups, knows what she does and does not like, and is very rarely willing to withold sex as a means of manipulation in a relationship - something guarenteed to get me cheating faster than all but one other thing (Accusing me of such when I have not. Gonna do the time, might as well do the crime - and I'll tell her that, too.) and it's unbelievably pathetic in a relationship.

Ack - I could go on and on about this one. Become comfortable with your sexuality before getting married - both parties - PLEASE. The most intimate and exciting part of a relationship shouldn't be a battle or a weapon. :mad:

Sugarmama
05-27-2009, 02:44 AM
Yeah, but she's my bump on a log :)

I don't have to worry about guys pawing her all day long. I'd be too jealous if I was dating a dancer in a serious relationship.


Honey I have just got to say I have seen those so called vanilla women out here doing more shit then any stripper. So don't put it pass your bump on a log u aren't her 24/7/365.

SteveSmith
05-27-2009, 06:27 AM
Our age difference is pretty substantial - about 13 years. He's the older one, though I'm sure you guessed that. It's easily the best and strongest relationship I've ever been in. I'm so grateful that I broke every stripper rule in the book and pursued him. ;D



I actively help her pick outfits and music, work on her look, and when I'm in the club I do everything in my ability to help with her hussle - pointing out guys that seem to like her, giving her tips on how she looked on stage or that she neglected one group or another who looked as though they held back on tips as a result; even bustng her chops whe she doesn't feel like going in and other girls text to tell her a regular is there lookig for her. Just like she tells me when she's met someone (at work or ANYWHERE) that's a potential business contact or fellow auto afficianado.



Try before you buy. Granted, this is through the lens of someone who likes watching men paw at his girl all night

MissMynxx and Almost Jaded sound like a couple of trolls (probably a couple of guys). Their writing is too cliched and contrived. Go back and read their posts on this thread.

OK. If you're not trolls, then I'd have to say that the normal response for the guy would be that he'd be more detached from the dancer's job and the guy wouldn't be thrilled about his SO being touched by other men. That's how normal men would react, although there are exceptions to the rule.

I get creeped out by guys like Almost Jaded, they act more like the dancer's pimp than a real boyfriend.

Earl_the_Pearl
05-27-2009, 04:22 PM
MissMynxx and Almost Jaded sound like a couple of trolls (probably a couple of guys).
I get creeped out by guys like Almost Jaded, they act more like the dancer's pimp than a real boyfriend.

I agree something is not right. If you can pick up on that you spend way too much time on the computer.:P

gameover
05-27-2009, 05:10 PM
Honey I have just got to say I have seen those so called vanilla women out here doing more shit then any stripper. So don't put it pass your bump on a log u aren't her 24/7/365.

I know anyone could possibly cheat. But, she isn't getting naked in front of hundreds of guys a day, and isn't exposed to as much opportunity to cheat as a dancer would be. I mean, how many threads are there on here from dancers talking about guys that want to sleep with them?

And she isn't grinding on other guys. Yeah, I know it is hypocritical. I like lap dances, but I wouldn't want my gf doing them to other guys. So, sure, the idea of sex with a stripper is a turn on, but a relationship with one would be too tough for me.

SteveSmith
05-27-2009, 05:38 PM
I agree something is not right. If you can pick up on that you spend way too much time on the computer.:P

I wonder if MissMynxx and Almost Jaded are actually a couple of dancers who are playing a prank on us guys. ;D

Earl_the_Pearl
05-27-2009, 05:47 PM
I wonder if MissMynxx and Almost Jaded are actually a couple of dancers who are playing a prank on us guys. ;D
Almost Jaded's posts have a dancer flavor to them. Maybe they are girl friends.

Almost Jaded
05-27-2009, 10:56 PM
Okay - I'll take the bait. What would satiate your pathetic curiosity about me/us? Make up some test. Anything you like. Hell - PM your phone number, I'll be happy to call, 24/7. Of course, you'd claim it was a guy freind of "ours" (we're both strippers, right?) doing us a favor in exchange for sex acts I'm sure, since all dancers are but thinly veiled whores in your eyes.

What are you doing in these boards anyway?

Next time any of you are in Vegas, drop me a PM. If we're for real, the lap dances are on you all night. :finger: After all, we MUST be fake; nobody could POSSIBLY be involved in a fulfilling relationship and think the way I and/or we describe - ESPECIALLY since EVERYONE is as obtuse and close minded as you. :rolleyes:

Tell you what - I'll raise the bar and tell you all kinds of personal relationship shit you have no right to know - just because damn near all of it will fry fuses in what you call a brain.

1. - She's into BDSM, and has introduced me into the lifestyle. After learning about whaat it means to her and why she's into it, I think it's one of the most healthy outlets I've ever come across. I'm sure you'll take issue with that, since it CAN'T be healthy to someone who uses the word "let" in reference to his SO's career choice. I love the irony there...

2. She's very bi, and I not only don't have a problem with her getting as much female action as she can handle, I encourage her pursuit of serious female love interests. It's like this: I'm straight - I know this because I'm not attracted to men, and I am to women, because women offer something men don't, a different connection. If she wants that, I can't offer it - so why would I have a problem with her getting it elsewhere? And no, my involvement isn't mandatory - in fact, I try to stay out of her way as much as possible. What say you two on this topic I wonder?

3. We actively involve other women in our relationship. She's very bi as stated before, and has very interesting views on the subject of me with other women. This took some serious getting used to, as I am not so comfortable with her having actual encounters with other men (see, inside the club doesn't count, 'cuz she doesn't do extras, and yes - despite meeting her in the club and ending up where we are, I trust her implicitly in the work environment) and I refuse to be a hypocrite. After MONTHS of talking about it, she has made clear to me why she is okay with - no, ENCOURAGES - my having encounters with women outside the relationship, with or without her involvement. She believes and has explained how and why that it brings us closer. I have not yet done so and still have some trepidation, but she's bringing me around. Setting me up with her hottest friends even, lol. I can't wait to hear your response to this one. I am pretty sure I already know it, but I'll wait for you to reply and maybe you'll surprise me.

4. We have a policy of COMPLETE honesty, period. I have never seen a "healthy" (by what I thus far percieve as your definition) relationship that can really manage that much less survive it. By all means, contradict me on that - give real world example, please.

5. She is the most understanding woman in the world when it comes to my exes, especially the most recent one. In her amazing way of putting it - "Of course I wish things were different, I AM human, bu 5 year relationships don't just go "poof" and I know that. If you get back together I hope that I helped you work out some issues in yourself that help you two make it. I would be sad, but I'd feel good knowing you were happy." Impossible? I thought so too. Of course, I've never dated a girl like her before. We started off in what might be considered a "rebound", so we've been very careful, knowing where such things end up. So far, it just keeps getting better.

There's a lot more, but your head probably exploded 1/2 way through #3 so I'll spare you. Seriously - your comments are beyond insulting. If you were to say some of those things to me in person, you'd be nursing a broken jaw.

Her comments probably sound like a dancer BECAUSE SHE'S A DANCER POSTING ON A FORUM FOR AND ABOUT DANCERS. Mine don't sound like a dancer, they sound like a guy who supports and respects both his woman and others in this line of work for the real - and very hard working - people they are. More succinctly - they just don't sound like a close minded asshole who puts dancers in a different class than other women.

Pricks.

Earl_the_Pearl
05-28-2009, 12:01 AM
3. We actively involve other women in our relationship. She's very bi as stated before, and has very interesting views on the subject of me with other women.

After MONTHS of talking about it, she has made clear to me why she is okay with - no, ENCOURAGES - my having encounters with women outside the relationship, with or without her involvement.
DUDE!! :highfive: Now we all understand. :thumbsup:

Almost Jaded
05-28-2009, 12:38 AM
No, that reaction clearly shows that you do not. Granted, a year or more ago I would've been thinking the same way. Believe me, this is very, very different, and while I suppose most men might think that as having teh cake and eating it too, it's very much not. Yep - first girl i've ever dated that encouraged me to sleep with other women - and I have a hard time wanting to. Only after we came to a mind on how and why it can make OUR bond stonger do I even consider it.

Earl_the_Pearl
05-28-2009, 12:55 AM
No, that reaction clearly shows that you do not. Dancers; such sweet sorrow. So do you see a life together?

Almost Jaded
05-28-2009, 02:11 AM
Dancers; such sweet sorrow.

Why the insistence that dancers are any different than any other women? Do you not see how patently narrow, shallow, close-minded, and just plain rude that is - not to mention WRONG?!

The ongoing implication is that there is something wrong with the girl who chooses to be a dancer when the real problem is with the guy who can't get over the stigma of a girl who chooses to be a dancer. That's it, that's all; as Dennis Leary says "end of fucking list".

Women in ANY OTHER JOB will have the same hangups. You'll find the shallow money-grubbing ones, the gold diggers. You'll find the insecure whack jobs and the totally together grounded types. You'll find addicts and to use the short terminology, whores - and you'll find refined ladies. You'll find pretty girls and not so pretty ones. Ones with work done and ones that are all natural. You'll find geniuses and mouth breathers. Total bitches and amazing sweethearts. In short, get a random group of strippers together and a random group of girls from any other job description, and you'll get the same ranges. The dancer group will probably have a higher average as far as looks go, and for the most part will be more secure with themselves and more outgoing. Basically, in my experience dancers have a higher average as far as finding a secure, good looking girl goes, and everything else levels out about the same percentage-wise.

So I ask instead of state: Where does the problem lie? With the strippers? Or with the men - dare I say LIKE YOU - who have hangups and issues that prevent them from considering dating a girl because of her profession - and as a result stigmatize these women in our society?

The original thread title now comes back - "Stripper: Turn on or turn off?" Only now we've reached a point - I hope - and maybe even take some credit for it - where the meaning behind the question isn't "are strippers relationship material" but "are you secure and open-minded enough as a man to realize that a girl who chooses this job is just as qualified to consider for a relationship as any other". ;)


So do you see a life together?

Proposed 3 months in, wanted to the 2nd time we hung out, lol. 3 months was as long as I could hold out against better judgement (again - the situation, NOTHING to do with her job). She has my ring on her finger. Is that clear enough?

Almost Jaded
05-28-2009, 02:20 AM
Ah - left out the SEX part. How dare I!

Add to the list of differences that with a few exceptions (especially in other adult industry areas) on both sides, you'll find that strippers are for the most part much more open about sex than other women. And that's a good thing - if you're a secure guy who understands how to make sex an important part of the relationship - in proper balance with his woman's wants and needs as well as his own. Again - this is the same as with any other girl - but with a dancer its usually a more immediate issue. Not because she's a problem - again, it;s the opposite. Becuase her job makes her a sex symbol, you have to be a guy who can handle her being objectified that way (as part of her job) without getting upset - while at the same time realizing that her job does't mean YOU get to objectify her that way outside of work. Most men can't handle one or the other; even fewer can truly grasp both.

So to re-answer the original question:

TURN ON. Strippers are generally the best possible pool of girls from which to date - provided you are a secure and evolved man who can handle picking a winner from any other group. Get that down, learn to TRULY respect a woman in every way, and the job description means only one thing: You get to see her naked before the first date. :)

johnnytwoshoes
05-28-2009, 06:16 PM
As a casual girlfriend I guess it would be OK. But if you wanted to meet my mom, well. You just have to imagine what mom would say. I guess the answer is fairly obvious.

I hope that answers this question.

hockeybobby
05-28-2009, 07:49 PM
My mommy can like it or lump it.

Cyril
05-28-2009, 09:29 PM
If I were single then one night stand would be OK. However, dating would be a bit too risky.

Golden_Rule
05-28-2009, 09:35 PM
I know this is for customers asking dancers questions but I have a question for the customers. When you meet some1 for the very 1st time & you find out the girl is a stripper, is that a turn on or turn off?

Let me answer a question with a question.

I'm a cop. Turn on or turn off?

The women who I notice become more attracted to me on a first encounter the moment I mention I carry a gun and a badge get the, "Yep, I've probably encountered another badge bunny whose probably just a bit shallow since all she seems to have taken note of is that I make a living as a cop." [that is before I retired and all :) ]

I doubt it works much different for women who find a gentleman's ears have perked up when hearing the words "dancer" or "stripper".

It may not mean she won't go out with you, maybe even have sex with you [I know I've dated and had sex with my share of badge bunnies in my day]. It just probably means they won't take you very seriously while doing either.