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View Full Version : Can't stop getting high



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LilyLove
05-13-2008, 09:47 PM
No, we do. A lot of us have anxiety problems. That's not an excuse for what you're doing, and you know this. That's why you started this thread and why you wan't us to flame you and why you keep throwing out hints about how truly fucked this situation is. You need to be told that what you're doing is completely over the line.

Binging on pills is not OK. Pills and alcohol is how people die. Relationship partners who provide us with narcotics are called enablers, and it is a shitty thing to be.

You want to hit bottom really hard. You want something so fucked and horrible to happen to you that the people around you will see how much trouble you're in and tell you it's OK to stop.

Listen. You CAN stop right now, if you want to. If you want the people around you to know how much you hurt, tell them, and it's OK to scream it as long as you don't hurt anybody and don't say anything you don't mean.

Because you think you'll wake up in a hospital bed with everybody around you telling you their sorry, but you might equally well wind up dead. And yeah, everybody will be sad for a while, but they'll also think you're a dumb-ass after a while they'll go out for pizza and you won't be able to go because you'll be fucking dead.

I say this out of love, and because I know what it's like.

Yup.

It makes me so sad to see you like this Joplin and I strongly encourage to keep looking until you find the help you need. Also, this boyfriend of yours is in denial. Enabling you does not equal love.

Finally, you and I both know that this isn't about the camera. The stolen camera was maybe something solid for you to focus on as fucked up in your life. So you're fixating on the camera. You have a lot going on inside of you that desperately needs to be addressed.

Jayde81
05-13-2008, 10:32 PM
babe is there ANYONE stable u can go stay with for a while it sounds to me your bf doesnt give a shit about your health and safety i think u need to get out of that situation, somewhere u can clear your head and feel safe again. xanax and alcohol=DANGER!!! i took a xanax in a nightclub (had no fucking idea how strong it was) i ended up blacking out and woke up in a guys bed i had only met that night. a few weeks later he was being charged for spiking girls drinks and raping them. i woke up with all my clothes on but i could easily have been raped without knowing it. its SO dangerous babe u NEED to get out of that situation NOW!!!

BalletBaby
05-14-2008, 01:06 AM
This thread makes me sad:( Please get help. Please.

Bella21
05-14-2008, 01:43 AM
I stopped reading around halfway of page four because it's bedtime. I'll finish it up tomorrow, but I just want to say:

Jop, if you don't think that you have a problem, then tell your doctor everything. If you're afraid to do that, then you have a problem... and it's going to continue to be a problem if you keep it a secret from the people who are meant to help you. I believe you know that this can't continue. You can't continue to do this for the rest of your life. Something will happen. I know it's hard. I KNOW. But you need to jump into the deep end and tell your doctor. Then, whatever needs to be done to help you will start to happen. It's not going to be easy, but it will save your life. I know it's scary, but be brave. Sure, it might be rehab. But, it might be something else... like a prescription that actually WORKS for you. The transition to that (if that is what your doc decides) won't be easy, but you will be happier and healthier in the long run. Think about all the things that you've thought about doing in your lifetime. You don't want to give up on that.

Bella21
05-14-2008, 01:55 AM
Okay, I just finished the thread actually...

Jop, no one on this site is going to really be able to help you. We can give you advice on where to get help and we can give you our own experiances and we can tell you that we care... but to get REAL help, you're going to have to reach out beyond SW. I think making this thread was your first step, but you're going to have to go further than that now, okay? For whatever the many reasons could be, this xanax is not working for you. You need to 'fess up to your doctor. Not only because of what I've already said above, but because if you stop taking that high of a dose cold turkey, you might go into seizures. Shoot, heavy alcholics go into seizures if they try to stop cold turkey. You need medical attention (I know that term is scary, but you need to take your health seriously). This is your LIFE.

I don't think that your bf is against you, but I do think he is... naive... for lack of a better word. He doesn't know how to handle this. You don't know how to handle this. This will not stop unless you 'fess up in your real and personal life to your doctor.

ellebelle
05-14-2008, 02:37 AM
As someone who just spent the last 5 days in Xanax withdrawel. Just stop. Please. This is not something you want to get hooked on, unless you plan on spending the rest of your life in a daze. Because getting off its a bitch.

This is a third time in 12 months I've ended up in withdrawel, and I don't take it all the time.. I'm quite careful about only taking it x number of days in a row. But sometimes I fuck up. And let me tell you it hurts. Not to mention the insomnia.. and the strain it puts on my relationships by being the crazy girl..

TigersMilk
05-14-2008, 02:48 AM
Joplin, I hope you get the help that you need and ultimately YOU are the only one who can actively do that. Of course, no one here wants to see you hurt yourself like this.

Thanks for your participation everyone.