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Jenny
08-30-2008, 09:24 PM
Hey , Jenny... I've got to give an answer to this agenda question. I can't say enough how my only agenda 'If it could be called that' is no more then kisses and hugs. It's the best in my book. As far as picking a fight I'd never want that....as far as more money ???? One part of me wants to BUT another part of me says lets just give it up..... Kind of like when I stopped smoking and fully realized as much as I like ciggies I can't hve Just-One. So I don't have any... NOTE: The One part of me versus another part of me thing.... They are BOTH way above the waist.
I've got to locate another fine lady (or several) and enjoy them for what they are entertainment...... Thanks, Jenny !
Well... what do you expect to happen when you "explain the error of her ways"? Like - if you have no intention of "reconciling" what is the point of that if not to argue? Why not just forget about her and find another (or several other) ladies? Why do you need one last confrontation?

cadencetyme
08-30-2008, 09:29 PM
I hope you can find another ATF. This one is doing you wrong and the dishonesty is not warranted at all.

phairestofthemall
08-30-2008, 09:30 PM
She's not gonna show up for coffee or whatever OTC anyway, you'll only lose more face by trying to make that happen. If you still really feel the need to tell her off you just need to txt or leave a vm and be done with her, and spend your time instead on a better ATF. I'd go with a txt myself, something like 'Thx 4 teachin me beauty's only skin deep. Lose my number'

VegasM
08-30-2008, 10:10 PM
$10K!!!???

Do what I did with my Ferrari after my $9,985.00 tune up: Dump her. Good money after bad doesn't make sense even if you have Bill Gate's bankroll.

grindonme
08-31-2008, 11:46 AM
Hey , Jenny... I've got to give an answer to this agenda question. I can't say enough how my only agenda 'If it could be called that' is no more then kisses and hugs. It's the best in my book. As far as picking a fight I'd never want that....as far as more money ???? One part of me wants to BUT another part of me says lets just give it up..... Kind of like when I stopped smoking and fully realized as much as I like ciggies I can't hve Just-One. So I don't have any... NOTE: The One part of me versus another part of me thing.... They are BOTH way above the waist.
I've got to locate several fine ladies and enjoy them for what they are entertainment...... Thanks, Jenny !

This is the best advice you can give yourself. Its the same advice i gave to a guy on the blueside. Your first downfall was seeing her as something other than entertainment inside the club. When you leave you leave the entertainment behind. Your second downfall and one that i see as the biggest downfall is having a ATF, i always said when i start going to the stripclub to see ONE person then i know its time for me to stop going because then i know she's become more than entertainment to me. Your first goal of putting them back in the entertainment category is to forget about meeting and explaining anything to the entertainment. Everything you tell her she is gonna already know she did

Sveta
08-31-2008, 11:56 AM
Maybe you don't seem as agenda free to her as you do to us.

That would be my first guess. There are two sides to every story.

soslow2
08-31-2008, 08:36 PM
Man, this is better, more honest and cheaper then going to any shrink. all of you have given me spot on advise and I appreciate it. Honestly it helps to be taken out of the woods I've been lost in. Seriously, I know this isn't life or death here but my fun time's sort of been fucked with so I guess that's why I bugged. BUT no more the advise and opinons of all have been most helpful and without any doubt I have moved on tonight. Variety is the spice of life and that is the realistic reason for going to the clubs anyway. If I want to meet a special lady I'll try the grocery store............I've heard that's a good place to meet. Thanks Ladies & Gents... Gotta go now I need to list my Ferrari on eBay

satoo
09-02-2008, 07:23 PM
Well $10,000 would've been better to spend at a shrink, tbh. Don't mean that as an insult.

Maybe a female shrink if you just want to pay to talk to a woman.

Pretty_Penny
09-02-2008, 07:28 PM
you know, i -am- taking a psychology class. :P

latingod
09-02-2008, 07:59 PM
Sorry for the edit, but maybe I'm not answering the OP question....

soslow2
09-03-2008, 02:02 AM
latingod, that's quite the story and much of the drama I can relate to. One thing that I found was / is a big hook are kisses. We've had many hours of just kissing while she's just on top of me in the VIP room. One night after several PATRONES and beers she threw a shot into her mouth, kisses me and then gave me the Patrone from her mouth to mine. Now that was sexy...Anyway that's how hot-n-heavy it was all the time. BUT..............that's done now, I've moved on thanks to many of you people here. I will be back to the club in a couple of weeks and I will be nice to her but she's not getting any more of my $$$. I just think some of the girls like the DRAMA.

Jenny
09-03-2008, 06:18 AM
latingod, that's quite the story Really? I actually thought that was an excellent warning on the dangers of mixing porn and acid.

Ladies and gentlemen - this is why masturbation and drugs don't mix.

loveandluxury
09-03-2008, 07:16 AM
why do the fucked up game playing girls get all the good regulars?

nevermind. i know the answer. i just don't want to know. sometimes i feel like i lose out for being honest and upfront.

a lot of the times, actually.

+1 :yes:

latingod
09-03-2008, 09:34 AM
We know we're in a game, and we like to play it, but I would say there are some limits to it. Did my girl really likes me, does she really wants to be with me?? I don't know nor intent to find out...I like her, she provides a service for me and I'm happy with that. My only recommendation, don't get personal... if something develops let it be outside the club, then you'll know...

grindonme
09-03-2008, 09:56 AM
Really? I actually thought that was an excellent warning on the dangers of mixing porn and acid.

Ladies and gentlemen - this is why masturbation and drugs don't mix.

lol..i couldn't even comment on it

SassyPants
09-05-2008, 12:49 PM
So if you KNOW it's all a game, why allow yourself to be put into such sticky situations? Because you can't control your dick? Hardly (Pun really wasn't intended, I swear). So you have the joy of rubbing it in her face when she does pull the hustling card? "HA HA BITCH I GOT YOU!" type shit? that's a bit sadistic, huh.

Phd-BA-BS
09-05-2008, 10:53 PM
I have been down this road once and that’s all it took. You need to be honest with yourself about having an agenda. Even if it’s as simple as her companionship or company. She obviously fills a need for you and she knows it. She also knows it won’t last forever and she is getting all she can till it runs dry. Always remember when you spend like that you’re in the driver’s seat. I say keep your weekly visit to an hour, spend a hundred and be off. During this hour and when you’re not spending large and she goes off to give another dance, cut the money off then for the night and start over the next week, She will get the message. If her attention dwindles spend a few hundred on someone else. It drives them crazy and frustrates them. If you continue you will eventually get so disappointed and end up resenting her. Keep it in the club, cut the money back and play it smart. After all it is supposed to be fun. Keep it fun. It just gets complicated after time. You’re in control as long as you don’t fall for her. Dancers are a dime a dozen but customers who spend like you are not.

soslow2
09-06-2008, 02:05 AM
My god budzoe and I are going to the club next Friday. I'll be very happy to sit and chat with her but have no plan on buying any dances with her. I want to enjoy my time there by sampling the other fruit on the vine. If this upsets her so be it. But always be nice is my style. There is little we have total control over but I do think we have total control over the way we treat others. I will report back how the evening went if you'd like to know.

grindonme
09-06-2008, 09:00 AM
My god budzoe and I are going to the club next Friday. I'll be very happy to sit and chat with her but have no plan on buying any dances with her. I want to enjoy my time there by sampling the other fruit on the vine. If this upsets her so be it. But always be nice is my style. There is little we have total control over but I do think we have total control over the way we treat others. I will report back how the evening went if you'd like to know.

Just say to yourself that whatever "thing" you two had is over. When you go into the club act like she isn't even there, if she approaches chat with her then but don't sit in the club rejecting other dancers so you'll be free and try to make eye contact with her in the hopes she'll come over so just so you can chat with her.

latingod
09-06-2008, 08:42 PM
I think you're right Jenny...thanks for the advice...

Jenny
09-06-2008, 08:48 PM
latingod - you might consider Trip Reports on Strip Club Junkie as a more welcoming audience for this sort of post. The guys there are waiting patiently and absolutely dying to hear all about what you did at the strip club. Although they will appreciate a more judicious use of sentences and paragraphs, I'm sure. This forum is a little more about guys asking (appropriate and well thought out) questions of the dancers here.

http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showthread.php?t=39030
You'll love it.

whitelight97402
09-07-2008, 08:13 PM
Lord man, please grow a 'pair' already, stop being so nice, she hasn't earned it. How do you expect some hot piece of ass to respect you when you don't respect yourself?

Why is she flaking on you? Because of exactly what you said in your original post because you are 'weak'. It is never just about the money, it is also about a power trip and she played you like a fiddle. She is never going to give you closure or any satisfactory explaination because she doesn't need to, don't waste your time.

Find another club, because your story has gone around the dressing room a few times, 10g is serious cash and every other girl at the club is going to try and out-do her. Find another club for 6 months atleast.

Stop bullshitting yourself about your agenda, you would love to fuck her. Nice guys trying to prove how 'nice' they are is a turn off and is simply indulging in yet more fantasy. You spent 10g to have her grind on your johnson, how does that transform into an OTC relationship?

Sorry to be so harsh, we've all been there and I just hate seeing guys getting walked on. Btw, you should be asking your guy buddies for advice not other dancers or woman and don't pussy-foot around, if you want to take a dancer home or you want to take her on a date, just tell her, it is really f'n simple, in my opinion, one of the coolest things about dancers is when you lay it out clean and simple and get it on your terms instead of hers you find out really fast which way it is going to go. good luck dude.

rockie
09-08-2008, 08:58 AM
Soslow: I'd establish your own boundaries to include that it all stays in the strip club for a specific length of time. Any suggestion of outside activities is declined by you for your established time frame. Occasionally, you need to break from your established boundaries - I recommend Dunkin Donuts with a 15 minute " make or break" window. As for your recent ATF, I wouldn't bother with a real conversation as she seems unsuited to a real conversation. My view is that it's all a game, but nobody has to get burned! The new Soslow determines what he gets for what he spends, because his brain still gets some of the blood flow. I might even consider including the recent ATF in your activities when it suits you. I know you can say "thank you", "no thank you", or "not today, thank you". You can still be respectful without being victimized. Soslow: You already know what you like, now use your experience and humor to prevent a repeat negative experience. Funny, you don't get from your neighborhood to your clubbing neighborhood without bypassing other options. You've already refined your choice in club. Continue to improve your gamein the club, and extend yourself a little, not a lot! Have fun!

soslow2
09-12-2008, 05:40 PM
Once again great input. One thing I really correct is I DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH THIS GIRL. For christs sake it's really not what every guy thinks about # 1 and at my tender age of 59 I should be hauled away for having sex with any woman / girl under the age of 38. That's all I've got to say about that except None of us are know-it-alls so please let that go. Now for my trip to fantasies today (from 2:30 pm to 6:30 pm). She came over to me the minute I got there all smiles (beautiful smile by the way) and to make a long story short proceeded to do all in her womanly power to get a private dance but with no success I'm afraid. I was nice although some how she seems to think she was the vic but 'Whatever'..
I was nothing but nice but just couldn't buy her a drink so she walked away in a huff. I did have a dance from another young lady who informed me she was told I was 'TAKEN'. I assured I was not taken and lets go for that dance. While the young lady was doing a great job the 'Other' one came buy and was all pissed off my friend told me. When we were finished with 2 dances I was the accused of doing it to hurt her (the OTHER one). My only comment to that remark was at 59 years old I'm not going to play games but I do want to have a good time. I also said I thank you for making me realize the ways and rules that are part of this whole process. I pay for some time and I'm made to feel special...........That Is Good and there's No Mre to it then that. Well after 30 minutes or so she comes back and say comon lets have a dance I'll make it very special. I am polite and decline her offer saying it's really not a smart place for me to go. She grabs my hand and starts off to a room...............again I say seriously I really can't do this .... to that she lets go and quickly walks away..............10 seconds later she blasts around the corner as I'm leaving............gives me a 'choke hold' around my throat with her hand a kiss and runs off. That's my night and all n all wentr well

whitelight97402
09-17-2008, 03:39 PM
^^^^

I'm lovin it man, lol, nothing like some entertaining ITC drama, just know she gave you that kiss 'cause she knows you are going to be thinking about it, just realize she is thinking about it as a game, it is a challenge to see if she can get you spending again....

Beeeee
09-17-2008, 04:54 PM
She is just stringing you along and that is probably part of her regular MO. I would find another girl to spend my money on. She sounds like too much BS.

latingod
09-17-2008, 09:17 PM
And of course you can keep playing just do not give in...she will get tired and that should be the end of that...

wild slash
09-20-2008, 05:06 PM
gees this thread has been great reading}:D

soslow2
09-20-2008, 09:22 PM
Ya it is kind of interesting to read and follow. Well I for one should actually thank her for assistance with my major attitude adjustment. I finally get it and won't get lost in it any more. I will just enjoy the time but with others and not her. Funny thing I heard from her close friend (not sure I believe that part). I guess there was much talk after I left the club the last time I was there. Talk about how I gave nothing to her and how pissed she was. How dare I have another girl dance for me. Well the really funny thing is the other girls appear to be very happy with what I did. Come to find out (not sure this is true but) she's not the most popular dancer there. She thinks she's the queen and makes fun of many of the girls. Man turns out she is one nasty bitch so I'm more then happy to screw with her now. But all in all..............I think a nice hello followed by lots of ignore will work just fine. Once again I truly thank you all for listening and I appreciate all of the opinions. If any of you are ever getting to dance at Fantasies please drop me a line........it would be quite interesting and what the hell..... You can make some money too!

wild slash
09-21-2008, 01:18 AM
well so slow
what she did to you was inexcusable not to turn up once well u can understand but she seriously fucked you around three times
and now you go to the club and dont spend any money on her

good onya buddy
i think thats the best pay back you could of done!!!!!!!!

please kep us updated as how this goes
i can feel theres more of this story to come yet!!!!!

wild slash
11-15-2008, 01:55 AM
hey so slow 2
whats the latest on this story????????????????

NaughtyBebe
11-15-2008, 02:25 AM
I have a customer that is really cheap with me and sends me cheap gifts and still thinks I'm coming out to see him. I have led him on just because he is so ridiculously cheap, but I wouldn't do that to someone that is spending that much money on me. I don't understand her, really.

soslow2
11-21-2008, 10:27 PM
Wow it's been a while. Well the latest I guess would be, I now go there maybe once a month and see a very nice woman who was her friend at one time. Seems that she, (the sick one Paula) has really been screwing with the girls too. I was told some nasty stories about other girls being set up and followed by (the sick ones man friend). Could be her husband as I was told she’s actually married and he, her husband most of the time is the person sending text messages to the guys she’s screwing with. They or he was given info as far as if they'd had a good night and where they lived. On 2 occasions I was told a couple of girls were stopped and their earnings were taken. It seems that 'Paula' (the sick one) has and does really pull some nasty shit on everyone. Following the chokehold she gave me out of frustration with my Not Spending a dime on her I've not spoken with her. She's reduced her hours over at Fantasies in Rhode Island and I was told she's working at another club. I know she worked at a place called the Cadillac Lounge but was fired for problems she had created. Things like taking drunken guys credit cards and getting cash at the club. Not very cool of her (but really stupid to get that drunk too). It funny that a woman I thought was so attractive when I've since taken a look is not at all attractive. I guess when you really step back a really look you can see what a person is. Funny thing.....I WAS so taken with her (Paula) that I actually spoke with my cousin about a possible photo-shoot for Paula. This was in the mid stages of my infatuation. My cousin is part of the Phantom of the Opera 'London' stage show. She was actually Minnie drivers singing voice in the movie. Cool I guess.....but anyway she knows some good people in the photo business which is why I called. When I think of what a dip shit I was I'm really embarrassed by the whole thing. I'll tell you one other story before I go. The night I thought she was coming to my hotel room with her friend I had some papers on the desk and a present I got her. The papers were for a house and land I had just sold in Scotland for 1.7m pounds and the present was a nice diamond bracelet. I swear to god even writing this I feel like such a dork. Anyway I think what pissed me off the most was what a moron she made me feel like. BUT I must thank her for that lesson, as it will never be repeated. So the bottom line is I am very cynical which reduces my enjoyment but I’m still very respectful of the woman and always tip them very very very well. As I said before it aint easy for you and I for one really appreciate what you bring to the party.
We all know one thing….what goes around comes around. Unfortunately it takes a while sometimes. The guys are taking me out for my 60th…..(holy shit) on December 5th so I see where we go. Fantasies or the Cadillac. ???????
I still love you guys and thank you for your service, advice and opinions.

wild slash
11-22-2008, 01:01 AM
well
ty for the update so slow 2
have a great night out on your birthday
go to both places!!!!lol

shadowfast
12-02-2008, 11:35 AM
WOW! this has been instructive at the very least. You were a sucker at 59, but now at 60 you have finally graduated a man. Have fun in your B-Day!

whitelight97402
12-02-2008, 03:39 PM
lol, hey soslow, glad to hear your still alive and that you kept your resolve and now see the situation. I think it is really cool that you aren't afraid to be open about this learning experience, I guess it kinda surprises me that you managed to get to age 60 before learning the lesson, but what the hell. happy b-day!