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Kalligirl
09-12-2008, 07:27 AM
FUCK THEM. WTF, girls saying, expect to get your nipple bit if a guy is paying you? Hm. I wonder wtf they do when they are in a VIP.

I am about to PM you. Cause I think I know what house mom you are talking about, FUCK THAT BITCH.

Jenny
09-12-2008, 07:34 AM
ET. You are mistaken. If he thought it was on offer because it was a standard fixture of a dance he would not have waited until time up to do it. It suggests quite the opposite of your contention - that he thought something bad might happen if he did that and didn't want to "waste" the money his friend spent in VIP. If he was all "hey, I'm allowed to bite the girls back here, that's what VIP is for. She won't mind in the slightest and I'm sure it will be gratifying for all parties" he would not have likely waited until it was definitely concluded that the VIP was officially and absolutely over. He would have sat down and said "Alright. Biting time. Come on over here." She said he was handsy, but manageable. So if she were managing his handsiness some information was likely exchanged that he was not allowed to touch certain places; whether through the physical removal of his hands or the a verbal admonition. It seems unlikely that a reasonable person would conclude "Okay, no touching. But I'm sure biting is fine." So even if his expectations were the end all be all of her physical rights, I don't think there is much to support that he legitimately expected such behaviour to be acceptable.

Even if he did think it was okay, you certainly don't have information adequate to conclude that he was right, or would usually be right. Since, in our society we have a pretty strong principle that generally you need permission before touching someone and we don't work it on a principle that you can assume everyone is okay with being bitten until after they tell you not to, you need some pretty compelling information or counter principle to reverse that. "Well, guys have expectations" is not compelling information. Girls here are going to have a strong reaction to anyone who suggests that their physical integrity is waived because they are strippers. It is not only wrong (as in inaccurate) is inherently disrespectful and dehumanizing. Like there is no way to say "Unlike other human beings, your body is free for all unless you actively reject touching" without making strippers less than other human beings. It is not surprising, then, that people here will see "the customer has a right to touch you unless you say no" as a pretty violent attack.

We know what we do for a living. And we know that when we agree to a dance we are agreeing to some level of sexual contact. Note - that is some fixed level, not every and any possible level. Because I agree to let a guy touch my butt does not mean I have agreed to let him lick my nipples. And a strip club, unlike a date, in an environment where negotiation of these things is up front and very, very easy. The idea that the responsibility is mine to ensure that that he follows basic laws of courtesy and, well, Law in our country I think needs some support.

lazydaisy
09-12-2008, 07:51 AM
^^As usual, well said Jenny.

I'm so sorry this happened to you VS. :( >:( No one should ever be assaulted on the job or any other place.

Kalligirl
09-12-2008, 07:55 AM
Since, in our society we have a pretty strong principle that generally you need permission before touching someone and we don't work it on a principle that you can assume everyone is okay with being bitten until after they tell you not to, you need some pretty compelling information or counter principle to reverse that. "Well, guys have expectations" is not compelling information. Girls here are going to have a strong reaction to anyone who suggests that their physical integrity is waived because they are strippers. It is not only wrong (as in inaccurate) is inherently disrespectful and dehumanizing. Like there is no way to say "Unlike other human beings, your body is free for all unless you actively reject touching" without making strippers less than other human beings. It is not surprising, then, that people here will see "the customer has a right to touch you unless you say no" as a pretty violent attack.



I conquer. I got attacked last night for standing up for myself while a guy was sitting there, degrading me. It was NOT in a strip club or "harsh envoironment", and perhaps I should've prepared better (aka, security) but, did I deserve it? Is it something expected? Fuck no. I have been doing private parties/calls for 2 years and nothing ever happened like that. And I have seen this guy before, he works at a medical university, sophisticated, and WAS a gentleman. So if you are going out there, wearing slutty shit or whatever you said ET, and you do 'raise a peep' and some guy slams you up against a building and rapes you, what, were you asking for it cause you dressed provactively?

Ay yiyiyiyiyi........ :O

hot4ablackchick
09-12-2008, 08:05 AM
ET. You are mistaken. If he thought it was on offer because it was a standard fixture of a dance he would not have waited until time up to do it. It suggests quite the opposite of your contention - that he thought something bad might happen if he did that and didn't want to "waste" the money his friend spent in VIP. If he was all "hey, I'm allowed to bite the girls back here, that's what VIP is for. She won't mind in the slightest and I'm sure it will be gratifying for all parties" he would not have likely waited until it was definitely concluded that the VIP was officially and absolutely over. He would have sat down and said "Alright. Biting time. Come on over here." She said he was handsy, but manageable. So if she were managing his handsiness some information was likely exchanged that he was not allowed to touch certain places; whether through the physical removal of his hands or the a verbal admonition. It seems unlikely that a reasonable person would conclude "Okay, no touching. But I'm sure biting is fine." So even if his expectations were the end all be all of her physical rights, I don't think there is much to support that he legitimately expected such behaviour to be acceptable.

Even if he did think it was okay, you certainly don't have information adequate to conclude that he was right, or would usually be right. Since, in our society we have a pretty strong principle that generally you need permission before touching someone and we don't work it on a principle that you can assume everyone is okay with being bitten until after they tell you not to, you need some pretty compelling information or counter principle to reverse that. "Well, guys have expectations" is not compelling information. Girls here are going to have a strong reaction to anyone who suggests that their physical integrity is waived because they are strippers. It is not only wrong (as in inaccurate) is inherently disrespectful and dehumanizing. Like there is no way to say "Unlike other human beings, your body is free for all unless you actively reject touching" without making strippers less than other human beings. It is not surprising, then, that people here will see "the customer has a right to touch you unless you say no" as a pretty violent attack.

We know what we do for a living. And we know that when we agree to a dance we are agreeing to some level of sexual contact. Note - that is some fixed level, not every and any possible level. Because I agree to let a guy touch my butt does not mean I have agreed to let him lick my nipples. And a strip club, unlike a date, in an environment where negotiation of these things is up front and very, very easy. The idea that the responsibility is mine to ensure that that he follows basic laws of courtesy and, well, Law in our country I think needs some support.

:teacher: Yes Jenny teach the unwise ones.

Anywho, I guess I shouldn't get angry at my kids for swinging on the ceiling fan (they did NOT really) because I never did tell them that hanging from the ceiling fan was not OK. That wasn't an official rule so all bets are off. If I told a custy no licking it would be my fault if he bit me because I didn't say no biting.

Jenny
09-12-2008, 08:22 AM
:teacher: Yes Jenny teach the unwise ones.

Anywho, I guess I shouldn't get angry at my kids for swinging on the ceiling fan (they did NOT really) because I never did tell them that hanging from the ceiling fan was not OK. That wasn't an official rule so all bets are off. If I told a custy no licking it would be my fault if he bit me because I didn't say no biting.
Hey, I told a story in another thread about a customer burned me with his cigarette. My fault, I guess. I mean, I never actually said "no burning."

VegasPrincess
09-12-2008, 08:31 AM
Wow, Viola, I am REALLY sorry that happened to you.... that is absolutely rediculous on the part of management!! You could have been REALLY hurt! That guy is a sadistic fuck. And so is everyone in your club who doesnt give a damn what happened.

Sophia_Starina
09-12-2008, 08:46 AM
OMG! :hug: Viola, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. There is nothing worse than being violated and then a) told that it's not a big deal, b) told it's your fault, c) told all that illogical nonsense bullshit..... by outright MORONS!

Fuck them! They are ignorant money-grubbing scum. I won't even get started about the douchebag that bit you..... :mad:

You are so right to quit. Don't work at a club where you don't feel safe.


If it were me in that situation and the club staff were inviting me to quit, treating me and my well-being with egregious disrespect, and acting like all-around fucktards I would:


Call 9-1-1


I'd make a police report.... and assuming the guy was still in the VIP (unbelievable!) I would have him arrested for assault.

Nothing like going out with a bang!

:grouphug: Feel better sweetie. I hope you get a clean bill of health. Love ya lots!

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 08:48 AM
Seriously, everybody, THANK YOU.

My boyfriend is out of town, so I bitched about this to my roommate, and when I was done, I was like "I gotta tell Stripperweb".

I wish you all were the management of my club!

The shitty thing is, my mark wasn't totally visible until I left work - it took about 2 hours to develop. I don't know what people are talking about that you would have a mark IMMEDIATELY. Bruises take a while to surface. They told me if he had broken skin they would have called the police ::) yea, right. They also told me I should have beat him up. Once again, yea, right. I would have gotten arrested for assault and they would not have backed me. Even though the mark wasn't bad until later, I was telling the truth, I had a witness, and no one cared. I was even mocked and made to feel foolish for being really upset about it. There's definitely a ghetto-thug air about some of the weekend girls, like they're such tough chicks and would not be surprised, hurt, or offended by being bit. They'd just pull their glock ::) Even the stupid dude who sells fake purses and jewelry in the dressing room was trying to reason with me that I was over-reacting. Fuck you, purse dude.

You shouldn't actively worry about your safety at work (even if you are a stripper) and the management shouldn't think of you as a pain in the ass because you don't take well to being treated poorly.

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 08:50 AM
SS, my club is so famous for bullshit on weekends. The cops would have laughed at me unless he bit my nipple off. Then they would have been treated me the same as management "What were you doing with your nipple that close to his mouth?!"

Sophia_Starina
09-12-2008, 08:51 AM
Seriously, everybody, THANK YOU.

My boyfriend is out of town, so I bitched about this to my roommate, and when I was done, I was like "I gotta tell Stripperweb".

I wish you all were the management of my club!

The shitty thing is, my mark wasn't totally visible until I left work - it took about 2 hours to develop. I don't know what people are talking about that you would have a mark IMMEDIATELY. Bruises take a while to surface. They told me if he had broken skin they would have called the police ::) yea, right. They also told me I should have beat him up. Once again, yea, right. I would have gotten arrested for assault and they would not have backed me. Even though the mark wasn't bad until later, I was telling the truth, I had a witness, and no one cared. I was even mocked and made to feel foolish for being really upset about it.

Take photos of the mark! There must be some legal avenue to take in this matter.

Sophia_Starina
09-12-2008, 08:54 AM
SS, my club is so famous for bullshit on weekends. The cops would have laughed at me unless he bit my nipple off. Then they would have been treated me the same as management "What were you doing with your nipple that close to his mouth?!"

:( That's horrible! Even more reasons that this is probably a blessing in disguise.........

I'm sending good vibes :goodvibes: your way, woman!

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 08:54 AM
^ I am so discouraged, I just want to move on from this.

anomar
09-12-2008, 08:55 AM
I'm so sorry that this happened to you! Hugs!

Take a few days off before the new club to pamper yourself, both your stripper self & your real self... repair and let that bruise heal (arnica and lots of it), steel yourself for a new club... hugs...

Sophia_Starina
09-12-2008, 08:57 AM
^ I am so discouraged, I just want to move on from this.


Move on! To greener($) pastures and safer places.... we're all pullin' for ya!

Optimist
09-12-2008, 09:49 AM
Why is it that every time someone posts a thread about being assaulted, someone always wants to chime in and blame the victim? I just don't get it.

Because some people after being assaulted choose to pretend they had power and just weren't vigilant. Others stand up for themselves like Violastrings!
You did the right thing and your time in hell has run it's course so don't even look back at that club unless they dramatically change the management.

Passenger
09-12-2008, 10:02 AM
Wow....I love that by that logic, had you not clearly communicated that it wasn't ok to punch you in the face in vip then you would have been to blame for that too had he assumed it would be ok since "some girls" might allow it for xxxx number of dollars.

Or is being punched in the face not "assault" either in the strip club because it's a more unruly environment than most?

Honestly...folks like that are the reason I don't like to leave my house.

ETA: Oops...I got so distracted by the dumbassery earlier in the thread that I forgot to tell you I am so sorry that happened to you, and that you had to deal with the additional trauma of not being backed up by anyone in your club.

sparkleeyz
09-12-2008, 10:06 AM
^^^^ U mean erotictonic's logic

Passenger
09-12-2008, 10:08 AM
^^^^Yes!!! I edited to fix it....sorry!

cutey5032
09-12-2008, 10:16 AM
I couldn't even read the whole thread. Fuck those motherfuckers. Shit like this makes me wanna bring a fucken tazer to work. So sorry V :hug:

*Iris*
09-12-2008, 11:47 AM
:hug: I am disgusted by everyone at your club fucking dumb fucks. Is this the same club where you have been having problems at? Im glad you decided to quit.

StarryEyes
09-12-2008, 11:54 AM
Ummm, I believe I already said that would be the right thing to do....


Ummmm...just reiterating the point. ;) Because somehow it got lost in the mess of your twisted logic...

CKXXX
09-12-2008, 12:06 PM
I couldn't even read the whole thread. Fuck those motherfuckers. Shit like this makes me wanna bring a fucken tazer to work. So sorry V :hug:

Shit like this is WHY I bring my taser to work. If nobody will have my back..I"ll have my own. And if they call the cops I'll be happy to show them marks,security tape,etc..that would clearly show self defense.
Worked when a club in Portland was so bad I had to call the cops and they tried to turn it around on me by telling the cop I pulled a taser on them. But joke was on them...I knew the law AND the exact code(14A-030-60 if I remember correctly) that CLEARLY stated that I can have my taser as long as I'm over 18,have no felony criminal record and do not knowingly use it against a police officer.
So the cop told them to shove it and I was 100% in the right.(that reminds me..I need to call the attorney and get that lawsuit moving)

Nobody deserves to get assaulted at work and its BS that the staff who are supposed to be there to protect the girls didnt do their job.

But you've mentioned several times that people at that club hate you...maybe if you were nicer to them,they'd be more likely to have your back. Not that they shouldnt have anyway..since thats their job...but human nature is going to dictate that you arent as likely to come to the rescue of someone who you dont like. Maybe just keep that in mind at the next club.

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 12:16 PM
^ they (the crooked housemom who once hired 4 known traveling hookers and the drug addicted general manager) hate A LOT of girls, basically anyone who isn't in their well insulated tightly established clique or anyone who doesn't work alone, is never in the dressing room, never leaves early, never complains legitimately to the bouncers, etc. Basically you have to either be in tight with them, or you need to be invisible. It's seriously like high school. They basically just want you to take in the ass without lube and not complain, figuratively, of course.

The weekday house mom and staff are awesome. I would work with them again, but NOT the weekend people. Club #2 during the school year, MAYBE this club during the summers. MAYBE, and only if I'm working with the good staff.

These people seriously suck.

Laylalust
09-12-2008, 12:16 PM
That is appalling. I'm so sorry that happened to you, VS.

miabella
09-12-2008, 12:19 PM
I've heard from many that the new place is less money, but they do care a little more when stuff like this happens and are stricter on stuff like assault. Extras are becoming the norm at the ex-club. I went through my records for the year, and I average pretty high per night, overall. I'd rather make slightly less and not be in constant fear and anxiety at work, which I was because literally NO ONE cares about you as a worker at the club, much less a person. My old club is honestly downright dangerous on weekends, and I'm sick of being awake until 5 AM.

A rapper shoved an 18 year old dancer, threw him out for it, then when they found out who he was they let him back in immediately.

this is something i expected to see turn up in this thread, but it hasn't.

when i worked upscale and high-earnings potential, management blamed the dancers if they got groped walking from stage to the dressing room or second stage because they should have somehow magically put their outfit on in ten seconds and leaped onto the next stage or dressing room hallway. you also got blamed if a customer hurt/groped you and you hit back or even just asked for help. sometimes girls got sent home, but the customers always got to stay and got free future entry (and sometimes got their money back, bleh).

but when i worked in a dive with lower but still good earnings potential, a guy saying a rude word to a dancer was thrown out, even if he was flinging 50s everywhere. one night a girl got bitten on stage by a guy in a group of spenders. they were thrown out. they were like 'but we're spending $$$$', and management just was like 'we can do this the hard way, you know'.

i just wonder whether it's more or less common to have protection in divey places vs upscale ones. i was able to boost the earning potential of the divey place for myself partly because i knew that the staff were ready to whip ass at the least word of *any* dancer, clean or dirty, high earning or barely making tipout. they treated us all as deserving of respect and expected the customers to do so as well. and it helps when customers know they can't even be rude in turning girls down, much less trying to grope/bite anyone, when nobody's money can buy them the right to disrespect the girls.

i hope the staff is more respectful and proactive at the club you are switching to.

Lklucky
09-12-2008, 12:58 PM
Horrible and not your fault in anyway-I always put my top on after a dance so that I am never sitting topless because I learned custies will take it upon themselves to grope you and do other shitty things when they realize the time is over and they can't afford you anymore>:(

ss
09-12-2008, 01:02 PM
First let me start off by saying I too am very sorry that this happened to you. Since we cant all be there in person to help you battle a large group of idiots, I along with many others will be sending you :hug: and positive support.

The fact that this happened makes me sad but it is amplified by the fact viola came here to vent and to get support and is treated in the same way that upset her in the first place. We should all want to be here for positive reasons. turning it around on her is not positive. She was the victim not the dumb ass who thought he would push his luck.

It was stated earlier that we must accept this behavior because she wasn't clear about rules about biting and because its part of the job.... I dont know about you guys but I learned not to bite people when I was first getting teeth and in pre school they again gave us refresher course on acceptable behavior including dont bite people. now as far our job is concerned, I work as a dancer/entertainer not as a chew toy. This business has changed a lot and not for the good. It seems like people have decided that its okay to forget basic social rules because they see bare butt and boobs. The trashy dancers comment shows the common mentality that I see taking over.

Viola I wish you luck at the new club. And thank you for standing up for yourself instead of letting them convince you that your feelings dont matter.

Susan-Va
09-12-2008, 01:10 PM
when i worked upscale and high-earnings potential, management blamed the dancers if they got groped walking from stage to the dressing room or second stage because they should have somehow magically put their outfit on in ten seconds and leaped onto the next stage or dressing room hallway. you also got blamed if a customer hurt/groped you and you hit back or even just asked for help. sometimes girls got sent home, but the customers always got to stay and got free future entry (and sometimes got their money back, bleh).

but when i worked in a dive with lower but still good earnings potential, a guy saying a rude word to a dancer was thrown out, even if he was flinging 50s everywhere. one night a girl got bitten on stage by a guy in a group of spenders. they were thrown out. they were like 'but we're spending $$$$', and management just was like 'we can do this the hard way, you know'.

i just wonder whether it's more or less common to have protection in divey places vs upscale ones. i was able to boost the earning potential of the divey place for myself partly because i knew that the staff were ready to whip ass at the least word of *any* dancer, clean or dirty, high earning or barely making tipout. they treated us all as deserving of respect and expected the customers to do so as well. and it helps when customers know they can't even be rude in turning girls down, much less trying to grope/bite anyone, when nobody's money can buy them the right to disrespect the girls.


Come to think of it, security has been better in dive places I've worked too. Upscale clubs seem to cater more towards the customers and dive bars cater more to the dancers.

ss
09-12-2008, 01:13 PM
this is something i expected to see turn up in this thread, but it hasn't.

when i worked upscale and high-earnings potential, management blamed the dancers if they got groped walking from stage to the dressing room or second stage because they should have somehow magically put their outfit on in ten seconds and leaped onto the next stage or dressing room hallway. you also got blamed if a customer hurt/groped you and you hit back or even just asked for help. sometimes girls got sent home, but the customers always got to stay and got free future entry (and sometimes got their money back, bleh).

but when i worked in a dive with lower but still good earnings potential, a guy saying a rude word to a dancer was thrown out, even if he was flinging 50s everywhere. one night a girl got bitten on stage by a guy in a group of spenders. they were thrown out. they were like 'but we're spending $$$$', and management just was like 'we can do this the hard way, you know'.

i just wonder whether it's more or less common to have protection in divey places vs upscale ones. i was able to boost the earning potential of the divey place for myself partly because i knew that the staff were ready to whip ass at the least word of *any* dancer, clean or dirty, high earning or barely making tipout. they treated us all as deserving of respect and expected the customers to do so as well. and it helps when customers know they can't even be rude in turning girls down, much less trying to grope/bite anyone, when nobody's money can buy them the right to disrespect the girls.

i hope the staff is more respectful and proactive at the club you are switching to.

Ive worked at a variety of clubs and the divey places that dont have a ton of girls seem to try harder to make sure you are comfortable and safe. the upscale ones have plenty of girls so they dont care if some leave. If 2 leave there will be 4 more that are just barely legal waiting to start

Kabukicho
09-12-2008, 01:25 PM
Come to think of it, security has been better in dive places I've worked too. Upscale clubs seem to cater more towards the customers and dive bars cater more to the dancers.

Never really thought of that before but I think you and miabella have a good point.

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 01:31 PM
^ actually, for as much money as there is to be made there... it's a dive! The locker room is the size of a small bedroom for up to 70 dancers a night :-/

The other place is a "nice" club with amenities.

Sophia_Starina
09-12-2008, 01:42 PM
^ actually, for as much money as there is to be made there... it's a dive! The locker room is the size of a small bedroom for up to 70 dancers a night :-/

The other place is a "nice" club with amenities.


What's the BAD club so I never end up there....>:( ?

Victoryx0x0
09-12-2008, 02:30 PM
ET. You are mistaken. If he thought it was on offer because it was a standard fixture of a dance he would not have waited until time up to do it. It suggests quite the opposite of your contention - that he thought something bad might happen if he did that and didn't want to "waste" the money his friend spent in VIP. If he was all "hey, I'm allowed to bite the girls back here, that's what VIP is for. She won't mind in the slightest and I'm sure it will be gratifying for all parties" he would not have likely waited until it was definitely concluded that the VIP was officially and absolutely over. He would have sat down and said "Alright. Biting time. Come on over here." She said he was handsy, but manageable. So if she were managing his handsiness some information was likely exchanged that he was not allowed to touch certain places; whether through the physical removal of his hands or the a verbal admonition. It seems unlikely that a reasonable person would conclude "Okay, no touching. But I'm sure biting is fine." So even if his expectations were the end all be all of her physical rights, I don't think there is much to support that he legitimately expected such behaviour to be acceptable.

Even if he did think it was okay, you certainly don't have information adequate to conclude that he was right, or would usually be right. Since, in our society we have a pretty strong principle that generally you need permission before touching someone and we don't work it on a principle that you can assume everyone is okay with being bitten until after they tell you not to, you need some pretty compelling information or counter principle to reverse that. "Well, guys have expectations" is not compelling information. Girls here are going to have a strong reaction to anyone who suggests that their physical integrity is waived because they are strippers. It is not only wrong (as in inaccurate) is inherently disrespectful and dehumanizing. Like there is no way to say "Unlike other human beings, your body is free for all unless you actively reject touching" without making strippers less than other human beings. It is not surprising, then, that people here will see "the customer has a right to touch you unless you say no" as a pretty violent attack.

We know what we do for a living. And we know that when we agree to a dance we are agreeing to some level of sexual contact. Note - that is some fixed level, not every and any possible level. Because I agree to let a guy touch my butt does not mean I have agreed to let him lick my nipples. And a strip club, unlike a date, in an environment where negotiation of these things is up front and very, very easy. The idea that the responsibility is mine to ensure that that he follows basic laws of courtesy and, well, Law in our country I think needs some support.

very very well said! i concur

Victoryx0x0
09-12-2008, 02:31 PM
Come to think of it, security has been better in dive places I've worked too. Upscale clubs seem to cater more towards the customers and dive bars cater more to the dancers.

i agree, i notice this too>:(

LadyM
09-12-2008, 03:04 PM
Do you think we could just simply disagree without throwing insults? :)

Calling you stupid was the least of the things I called you after reading your response. Be glad you didn't say something that stupid in person. You would have heard a helluva lot worse.

CKXXX
09-12-2008, 04:08 PM
Come to think of it, security has been better in dive places I've worked too. Upscale clubs seem to cater more towards the customers and dive bars cater more to the dancers.

Yep..every "upscale" gown type club I ever worked at...security was a joke. Dive places would kick a guys ass for looking at you funny. ONE of the reasons I prefer dives!

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 04:42 PM
I think it can go either way, regardless of the level of "classiness" or lack thereof. I definitely think it is a good vs. bad management issue. At the end of the day, it comes down to the manager's decisions. Who is more valuable to the club - the dancers who make money for the club or the people who bring money into the club? There has to be a balance somewhere where you can keep the dancers safe and the customers you WANT to be there happy. Guys (especially when they're drunk) KNOW they're doing wrong when they do these things, but they're like children, sometimes they test their boundaries and they WANT to be told "No" sometimes. If you throw them out, it's not like they're not going to come back to your club or another club.

txchick008
09-12-2008, 05:22 PM
Yep..every "upscale" gown type club I ever worked at...security was a joke. Dive places would kick a guys ass for looking at you funny. ONE of the reasons I prefer dives!

I have heard the same thing. A girl I work with (who used to work at The Clubhouse, a more blue-collar place), said that over there, if a guy didn't pay, they'd BEAT HIS ASS, and then literally throw him out ON his ass.

Over here, it's like..."you girls have a better chance of getting the money out of them, you handle it". :O They don't wanna step on any customer's toes.....ridiculous.

needtodance
09-12-2008, 05:33 PM
Hmmm. I'ev worked at the wrong dives, i guess!

I just don't think its a dancers industry anymore. I haven't seen a strip club, dive bar OR gentlements club, in which i DID feel confident that management would have my back. In fact, most of them go out of their way to prove the otherwise. It's always pissed me off.... Particularly since they all have required tip outs. Wheres the incentive for htem to help me if they know they're "entitled" to my money either way?

I'm sorry that happened to you---what a club full of douches! I hope you'll be much better at the new place.

And yeah, wtf is up with the "blame the victim" thing?!

Kellydancer
09-12-2008, 06:42 PM
I would have punched that guy. That was wrong on so many levels. Sadly, managers will usually side against the dancers. I learned this the hard way when a customer slapped a dancer (in front of the manager) and the manager gave him a free drink because the customer claimed "she led him on". I wish I could say I'm surprised by other people who work at the club, but that doesn't surprise me either. Sorry this happened and it was the guy's fault (and the club for letting things like this happen).

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 06:47 PM
^ holy shit!

Guys watch out for other guys no matter what. I think a lot of the managers and bouncers secretly hate us and take pleasure in all this.

Sveta
09-12-2008, 07:04 PM
i just wonder whether it's more or less common to have protection in divey places vs upscale ones.


No. It just depends on the individual clubs. I've danced in several upscale clubs with great security, several other upscale clubs where no one gave a crap, and a few others where security was somewhere in the middle. :shrug:

venusace138
09-12-2008, 07:28 PM
Yep..every "upscale" gown type club I ever worked at...security was a joke. Dive places would kick a guys ass for looking at you funny. ONE of the reasons I prefer dives!

This has been my experience too. Shitholes attract dudes who like to live up to the seediness of it all. So they go out of their way to be tough guys! I've worked shitholes where bouncers would literally gang up on a customer, throw his ass in the back, and turn the guy inside out looking for $ if he refused to pay.

And not that it's an ideal set up, but I've also seen girls beat the shit out of customers, and get away with it. Naturally the dude did something to deserve it. :P

Meanwhile at the so-called upscale places, we're expected to act like 'ladies', yet theres too many trashy ho's, and the men don't act like gentlemen.

Optimist
09-12-2008, 07:37 PM
I couldn't even read the whole thread. Fuck those motherfuckers. Shit like this makes me wanna bring a fucken tazer to work. So sorry V :hug:

+1 on packing a tazer at work

Optimist
09-12-2008, 07:41 PM
This has been my experience too. Shitholes attract dudes who like to live up to the seediness of it all. So they go out of their way to be tough guys! I've worked shitholes where bouncers would literally gang up on a customer, throw his ass in the back, and turn the guy inside out looking for $ if he refused to pay.

And not that it's an ideal set up, but I've also seen girls beat the shit out of customers, and get away with it. Naturally the dude did something to deserve it. :P

Meanwhile at the so-called upscale places, we're expected to act like 'ladies', yet theres too many trashy ho's, and the men don't act like gentlemen.

YES, They want you to be a supermodel-ho-fucktoy! >:(

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 07:48 PM
I think what it comes down to is the game of who needs who the most.

At a "classy" club with high earnings potential, girls are knocking down the doors to work there. You are expendable, and they always like fresh new faces. At the dive bars, they value and protect girls who are assets to the club because they need them.

kittytheflamingo
09-12-2008, 07:52 PM
Maybe let the weekday staff know what happened? Sometimes a staff shake up happens, and the more info other employees have, the more likely it is. It won't happen just becouse of this incident, but you know they're doing it to other girls so the more crap whoever in power hears, the more likely something might be done.

Fuckheads like these are the main reason behavior in clubs has gone down hill. Don't ever "just get over it" ! If no one says no, it just gets worse. Congradulations for having the self respect to put your foot down, now if we could just get more of us to have your kind of courage!

ViolaStrings
09-12-2008, 08:05 PM
^ the weekend staff will never lose power. They're the crooked alpha staff of a crooked club.

Zia_Abq
09-12-2008, 09:55 PM
Things often happen for a reason. Your reason is that you deserve a better working environment. Go get hired at a better club and never look back. Fuck those asshole. Success is the greatest revenge anyway!