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View Full Version : The effect of frequenting SC on sex with SO?



bsteve
11-16-2008, 09:43 PM
Sorry if this has been discussed before; I searched but surprisingly I did not find anything on this topic.

I am wondering what effect going to SC has had on the sexual relationship with your GF or wife?

I am 44 yo, happily married for 15 years, and I have started to frequenting SC about 6 months ago. In my case there has not been many noticable effects on my sex life; most indicators, such as, frequency, duration, rate of fulfilment of sexual fantasies, have held pretty steady. My wife is wonderful.

However, I noticed that I like to play a role of the sub more frequently. Yes, I do enjoy tying her up and having my way with her occassionally, but more recently I love it when she does the same to me. My wife is not really into being on top, but I love it. Has anyone experienced anythign similar, or is it just a coincidence?

sixty
02-25-2009, 01:32 PM
It's complicated, for sure. /:O

I was unhappy with the lack of sex in my marriage (I'm divorced now), which is why years ago I began going to SCs (and also, on 2 or 3 occasions, a provider). I craved the visual/tactile stimulation, and I suppose somewhere along the line that I convinced myself that it would "inspire" me in bed with my wife. It didn't, and in fact it had the exact opposite effect. I came to avoid sex with my partner as much as she did, and I lost any remaining physical attraction to her when I began to realize what's out there.

But I do sort of identify with your discovery of liking it on the bottom more. Maybe it's purely coincidental and just related to the inclinations of the partners I happen to have been involved with over the last couple of years, but I do see myself getting most enjoyment out of her being on top (as opposed to when I was married when I recall it was mostly mish). Or maybe, as you seem to be suggesting, it is the lap dance posture that carries over into the bedroom. But who cares, cowgirl is a great position anyway...

As you can see, I am more interested in the effect of SCing on the frequency of sex rather than on the quality of it.

Jake39
08-03-2009, 09:26 PM
My wife just wants a business relationship; sex stopped about 12 yr ago I attribute it to female prob / change of life issues and my resentment of her abuse towards our sons and myself. Everything ends at some point in time. I have had sex sessions (both itc and otc) with 18 different gals (mostly strippers) in the last 5 years. The current one I have been doing a year I have chalked up 60 sessions w POP averaging $200. The sex is the best I have ever had - she is 27 and married, very easy going; she reaches climax about 3-4 times during the session....The record holder is a gal I achieved 75 sessions with - she was a 30 yr old dancer I met on 2 for 1 day. I have found I prefer strippers in their mid to late 20's as mistresses. My current gal has been the best performer starting with fantastic HJ foreplay (it turns her on), then does it with her on top, her leaning forward and thrusting. If you have never had one give it to you like this you don't know what your missing. I just lay back and let her come get me....she loves it and sees our sessions as tremendous stress relief not to mention exciting, rapturous sexual pleasure.

I am repulsed at the idea of sex with my wife both physically and emotionally. She has no desire to be touched coupled with her poison personality and I doubt I could train her to give it to me like I am getting it from my GF. I have been married to her 35 years. I probably will go on with a succession of mistresses until the day I die. I have never admitted to any cheating (although it is suspected) and have no intention. While I have no idea how many times I have done it with wife, I am getting a bit disturbed at the idea that my sessions with other women exceeding what I may have chalked up in the marriage. More remorse at marrying her than guilt.

xdamage
08-03-2009, 10:19 PM
I am repulsed at the idea of sex with my wife both physically and emotionally. She has no desire to be touched and I doubt I could train her to give it to me like I am getting it from my GF. I have been married to her 35 years. I probably will go on with a succession of mistresses until the day I die. I have never admitted to any cheating (although it is suspected) and have no intention. While I have no idea how many times I have done it with wife, I am getting a bit disturbed at the idea that my sessions with other women exceeding what I may have chalked up in the marriage. Guilty or overly analytical?

Marriage fail. But it is also the fault of our system which has the whole God blesses marriage thing going on, forever until end of time... etc. so no matter how bad the relationship it is so costly to get out, people like yourself just stay married.

I've taken the opposite approach though. Not touching yes, staying married cause divorce is painfully expensive on us guys, cheating no, so ya... guess I'll just cope. I sort of like my sense of right/wrong better then fucking random strangers, but honestly the divorce laws suck in multiple ways. But a question.. I assume you don't mind if the truth is your wife is banging other guys? What is good for goose and gander right? Like I wouldn't give a fuck who she sleeps with, but also it's very uncool to pass on random disease X to your wife/husband.

threlayer
08-07-2009, 06:19 AM
Here's an idea:

Lack of sex being a grounds for divorce, since that is the biological reason for marriage. Seems fair to me, whatever the fault if someone complains to that level.

Earl_the_Pearl
08-07-2009, 03:15 PM
Here's an idea:

Lack of sex being a grounds for divorce, since that is the biological reason for marriage. Seems fair to me, whatever the fault if someone complains to that level.
Most states are now no fault divorce; ether party can file for any/no reason.