View Full Version : "If Strippers Ruled the World"...

Pages : 1 [2]

05-24-2009, 06:32 PM
Engineers in New York, Chicago, Taipei, Kuala Lampur, Singapore, Dubai, Shanghi & Hong Kong would all be competing to build the world's tallest stripper pole.

05-24-2009, 06:33 PM
Daylight savings would get shifted about 5 hours instead of just 1.

05-24-2009, 06:35 PM
Zoning laws would be drastrically ammended allowing clubs to be in the best parts of town.

05-30-2009, 10:34 AM
My Car!


06-08-2009, 07:55 AM
Exotic Dancing experience would be a highlight on a resume.

06-11-2009, 07:04 AM
ESPN69 would provide coverage of every major pole dance competition.

06-11-2009, 07:13 AM
The 401SC plan would be created to allow pretax contributions from one's paycheck directly into a SC spending account.

06-11-2009, 07:22 AM
All street lights, traffic lights and road signs would be placed on top of poles no more than 2" in diameter.

06-11-2009, 03:32 PM
Blacklights and neon lights would become the norm in most buildings

Lapdances would become an acceptable form of currency

06-11-2009, 07:15 PM

I like the way verfolgung has single handledly kept this thread alive.

06-16-2009, 01:37 PM

06-16-2009, 01:44 PM
Every year all female workers would get ...

18 paid holidays
2 floating holidays
8 weeks of paid vacation
10 sick days
84 personal days ;)

06-16-2009, 01:50 PM
There would be a LONG line of extraterrestrials asking to be "taken to our leader".

06-24-2009, 05:42 AM
Home listings would include # of bedrooms, # of bathrooms and # of poles.

06-24-2009, 09:14 AM
The world would be a better (and prettier) place.

06-24-2009, 02:23 PM
I would finally get a tax credit for all the tuition i have been paying

06-24-2009, 04:27 PM
Since most people now have cell phones, obsolete phone booths in bars, restaurants, hotels and airports would get repurposed as public lapdance stalls.

07-02-2009, 10:42 AM
June 9th would be a national holiday dedicated to dancers.

07-02-2009, 10:49 AM
June 9th would be a national holiday dedicated to dancers.

:D---uh i wonder why----::)

07-07-2009, 06:47 AM
There would be a federal maturnity leave fund

07-14-2009, 01:40 PM
There would be a federal grant to research and develop a hygenic self cleaning pole.

07-16-2009, 06:32 AM
Any SC with a second floor would be required to have elevators or escalators, especially for going down.

07-17-2009, 04:43 AM
Only half of Congress would show up....and only then half would still arrive 2 hours after their scheduled arrival time.

Oh wait, that happens already.

Maybe it's coming true....ugly white men with stripper mentality.... MIND BLEACH NEEDED

08-12-2009, 03:17 PM
There would be no national debt, and the federal budget would be in balance as those in control are used to only paying for what they can afford in cash. Heh.

(Conversely, if there was a national debt, it would be tracked in the number of dances and champagne rooms needed to pay it off.)

Sadly I have not danced for years and I still handle my money like this LOL.

and "extras" girls will be sent of to reservation to live and work amongst thier own. To allow better standards and working enviroments for the rest of the women.

08-24-2009, 08:14 AM
The walls of the oval office would be mirrored.

08-26-2009, 07:16 AM
Parents all over the world would be disappointed when they learn tht their daughter was only telling them that she was dancer as a cover for her office job.

08-26-2009, 07:16 AM
On election night the polls would stay open until 2 AM.
(and the phrase would take on a whole new meaning.)

Su Su
05-14-2010, 06:04 AM
Dressing your sluttiest/skankiest.... & No one would give a flying F.

Oh and platforms would never go out of fashion...
Oh! and shopping in costume/stripper shoe stores would be a breeze, cos they would be inexpensive cos they would be everywhere!!

06-04-2010, 10:25 PM
Items like babywipes, makeup remover and tampons wouldn't be hidden away in a corner of wal-mart, they would be in the very front.

also, those little last minute items in the aisles? instead of candy bars, they would strictly have things like razors, body spray and 5 hour energy

Harleigh HellKat
06-04-2010, 11:23 PM
Women would be wearing 8 inch clear shoes on modeling runways... oh wait! ::)

06-24-2010, 10:30 AM
It would be acceptable to make large purchases in ones, fives, and tens.

Banks would have Stripper hours (1AM to 2PM)

Pageants would have a Pole dance competition, and Stripperwear would replace the Evening dress. Bonus points for original features worthy outfits.

The Stripper Union would rival the UAW.

Politicians (beside the French) would be competing to have the better Stripper on speed dial.

Strippers would be part of the State dept Protocol office.

Betty Paige would have her own Dollar coin.

06-29-2010, 07:04 PM
I thought strippers did rule the world...?? hmmm

06-29-2010, 07:06 PM
Lapdances would become an acceptable form of currency[/quote]

awesome... it'd be nice to pay for your groceries in lapdances...lmao

07-10-2010, 07:36 PM
the world would be a lot more fun!:)

07-29-2010, 11:26 AM
local mcdonads and starbuck doing delivery
banks open till 6-7pm
men getting a separate paypacket for lapdance expenses
research into cheap and painless laser hair removal
a broken nail enough to qualify for a medical certificate and mestruation as paid sick leave
free salon blowdries and fake tan booths
sweatpants boner man would be wanted by the fbi to be drawn quartered and pissed on
complementary limo service between salon, shopping mall and club trips
dancers receiving a good hourly wage plus commission from dances, all the tips minus tipouts and fees
stripping and pole dance would be a normal part of classical ballet and opera performances with wet tshirt contests in the intermission
stairs would be replaced by esculators
xanax in tictac boxes at the local servo
dancers boyfriends having special employer permission to do evening shifts to nurture relationships and spend daytime together
daytime tv would be far more interesting with exotic star, miss pole and makeup tutotial screenings.

all i can think of atm

08-06-2010, 02:41 PM
sweatpants boner man would be wanted by the fbi to be drawn quartered and pissed on

Omg, I'm laughing so hard right now! :rotfl::rotfl: