View Full Version : Why Lie About Age?
Everyman
04-17-2009, 05:51 PM
Perving on a 19 yo cheerleeder isn't the problem. (Hmmm, I was doing the same a few nights ago.) ;D
The only creepy part, was being turned-off when he found out she was actually a few years older. Gave it a real tone that made me think this could be an OTC pervy thing also, not just a hot fantasy.
Not "turned off". I still saw her and got dances from her until she left the club a few weeks later.
But let's say you like extra spicy hot sauce on your taco. Then you get a taco that just has mild salsa on it. You'll still eat it, and enjoy it, but it's not your optimal taco. That's all I'm saying.
I'm the king of psychoanalysis, but I think there's a little too much "reading into things" going on here.
verfolgung
04-17-2009, 05:58 PM
... What's the point? 22 is actually more attractive to me (if age makes a difference at all) than 25. Why lie about this?
... I'm the king of psychoanalysis, but I think there's a little too much "reading into things" going on here.
... Hrm, really? ::)
princessjas
04-17-2009, 06:00 PM
Not "turned off". I still saw her and got dances from her until she left the club a few weeks later.
But let's say you like extra spicy hot sauce on your taco. Then you get a taco that just has mild salsa on it. You'll still eat it, and enjoy it, but it's not your optimal taco. That's all I'm saying.
I'm the king of psychoanalysis, but I think there's a little too much "reading into things" going on here.
I'm a chick...One with 7yrs of higher ed, of course I read into things. All women with any kind of brain analyzes the hell out of everything you say (The communication centers of our brains are much larger and more active). Oh, and your description still didn't take it down to non-creepy. Still slightly creepy. If you said it just interfered with the fantasy because you have no imagination, well, that I would get. What you are describing is still mildly disturbing....but then I'm a girl who over-analyzes things. :P
Everyman
04-17-2009, 06:14 PM
I'm a chick...One with 7yrs of higher ed, of course I read into things. All women with any kind of brain analyzes the hell out of everything you say (The communication centers of our brains are much larger and more active). Oh, and your description still didn't take it down to non-creepy. Still slightly creepy. If you said it just interfered with the fantasy because you have no imagination, well, that I would get. What you are describing is still mildly disturbing....but then I'm a girl who over-analyzes things. :P
OK...so I'm thinking, what is the reason I would prefer 19 over 27 if they look identical? Call this creepy or pervy or whatever, but it does have to do with the (supposed) innocence. I find a stripper who is new, and maybe not quite sure why she is there, or if she really even likes it, far more appealing than a vet 27 y/o with 2 kids and a husband at home.
NOT so I can "take advantage" of her...that's insulting. in my experience it's the older dancers who are all too eager to go the extra mile for the extra dollar.
princessjas
04-17-2009, 06:33 PM
So it isn't about age and life experience...It's about stripping experience (and lifestyle....not having multiple kids by different dads at a young age, etc)? I get that completely. After 10 yrs I STILL have a mini panic attack damn near every night, new guys think I'm new and I bank because of it. Also, not having kids till nearly 30 really helped my dancing career.
In my experience tho, the ONLY reason a guy would prefer 19 over 27 is she is easily manipulatible. Don't be offended, it happens constantly. Older guy, is a perv, lands hot young chick he can jerk around and lie to and manipulate...much better for a shady guy than dealing with a mid-20's - mid 30's chick who is just as hot but more mature and able to take care of herself. She depends on him and he can get by with more. Disgusting, but I've seen it time and again.
BTW - If you have a preference for chicks with no kids or what have you. That seems completely normal...It was just the insistence on the age that creeped me out.
ETA - I've been into the wine now, so I aplogize if I'm babbling on at this point. lol
OK...so I'm thinking, what is the reason I would prefer 19 over 27 if they look identical? Call this creepy or pervy or whatever, but it does have to do with the (supposed) innocence. I find a stripper who is new, and maybe not quite sure why she is there, or if she really even likes it, far more appealing than a vet 27 y/o with 2 kids and a husband at home.
NOT so I can "take advantage" of her...that's insulting. in my experience it's the older dancers who are all too eager to go the extra mile for the extra dollar.
Crow2
04-18-2009, 12:27 AM
OK...so I'm thinking, what is the reason I would prefer 19 over 27 if they look identical? Call this creepy or pervy or whatever, but it does have to do with the (supposed) innocence. I find a stripper who is new, and maybe not quite sure why she is there, or if she really even likes it, far more appealing than a vet 27 y/o with 2 kids and a husband at home.
NOT so I can "take advantage" of her...that's insulting. in my experience it's the older dancers who are all too eager to go the extra mile for the extra dollar.
Your experience is limited from what I've seen - don't make blanket statements.
Everyman
04-18-2009, 05:30 AM
Your experience is limited from what I've seen - don't make blanket statements.
I'm not making a blanket statement that all 19 y/o are x and all 27 y/o are y. I'm thinking and trying to articulate why I would prefer one over the other. Which I am perfectly entitled to do, given that I am now assumed to be some kind of child-molester-in-waiting.
Crow2
04-18-2009, 10:32 AM
OK...so I'm thinking, what is the reason I would prefer 19 over 27 if they look identical? Call this creepy or pervy or whatever, but it does have to do with the (supposed) innocence. I find a stripper who is new, and maybe not quite sure why she is there, or if she really even likes it, far more appealing than a vet 27 y/o with 2 kids and a husband at home.
NOT so I can "take advantage" of her...that's insulting. in my experience it's the { older dancers who are all too eager to go the extra mile for the extra dollar. }
Annnnnnnnnnd once again you missed the point... derh?
in my experience it's the older dancers who are all too eager to go the extra mile for the extra dollar
LOL, She's moving right into my target stripper demographic FBR....}:D
Yoda, if you ever infiltrated my club I would not stand a chance. Keep you ass up in New England :P
FBR
Everyman
04-23-2009, 04:22 PM
Update, and the likely explanation for this particular white lie.
I'm getting to know this dancer better. Today, all of a sudden she's 22....I'm she doesn't remember our conversation where she's 25.
BUT, I learned she started dancing underage, at 16. And when she started she had a fake I'd that said 19. She didn't specifically say it, but I'm sure a +3 age difference just became standard for her at some point -- even now, it can still explain how long she's been dancing (legally).
Makes as much sense as anything else.
SerenaSin
04-23-2009, 05:52 PM
How do you even know that she lied? Maybe the other dancer lied, or maybe she was just mistaken.
thats what i was thinking...
lmiller22134
08-01-2009, 03:22 AM
Whoa whoa whoa....not surprised or offended in the least that dancers lie. I know why, and I know customers do, too.
My question was actually very narrow: what would be the rationale for lying from 22 to 25? That change seems very inconsequential and not worth lying about, to me.
Perhaps she is sick of hearing "omg you are so young I can't get a dance from you you're like my daughters age!" I know I sure as hell am. I don't get why so many girls lie to make themselves YOUNGER. I have missed out on so many lap dances because I'm under 25. I also get told I look 19 alot (and i work at a freaking 21 and over club!). I dont look 19, its just that so many girls take years off their age that as a result your idea of what a 22 year old looks like is completely effedup.
And I'm pretty grossed out that you say you prefer a 19 year old to a 27 year old. Liking innocence is all good and dandy if you're under 20...but how old are you? I personally cant look at a guy or girl under 21 and not think "baby" dating someone that young would make me sick, if only because they LOOK like children. i dont get how men in their 40s can find teenagers attractive.
audrey_k
08-01-2009, 05:53 AM
I change my age depending on the customer. I had a wide age range I can fit into (15-25). If I'm pretending to be cute and innocent, I'll say younger. If I'm trying to be more sophisticated and cultured, I'll say older.
Some older guys surprisingly get turned off if I say I'm young, or it sparks too many annoying questions (do your parents know you dance? do your friends? why are you dancing? do you still live with your parents what do you tell them your job is? ::))
Perry
08-01-2009, 04:35 PM
Why would you even ask that? Maybe I'm old fashioned, but age, weight and real hair color are not polite things to ask a lady.
Personally, I never answered the question. I'd do that infuriating, "How old do you think I am?" thing and turn the conversation back to the custy.
sananeko
08-01-2009, 04:46 PM
A dancer told me she was 25. I have since learned (reliable sources) she is actually 22.
What's the point? 22 is actually more attractive to me (if age makes a difference at all) than 25. Why lie about this?
A few reasons..
One. She might want to seem more mature.
Two. She might have added that to her persona
Three. She might have done that to make it harder for you to track her down, some people can track down a person with only looks and age. She says shes 25 then talks about school and your a creep. You will be looking for a 25 year old in school with what type of classes she has. It makes it harder for morons that can't take a hint.
I have lots more but I believe you got the picture.
bumrubber
08-01-2009, 06:26 PM
It's all a fantasy anyway.
If I were a dancer I'd probably not use my real age for the same reason I wouldn' t use my real name.
BTW in person I always tell the truth about my age but never online.
Think about it.
Gia2608
08-01-2009, 06:32 PM
Because she can....
Coming from a girl who claims to be "25 ish", lol... She was trying to be who you wanted her to be. Maybe she's really 20 and wanted to drink.
BuxomBeauty
08-01-2009, 06:43 PM
Why does it matter, really?? No matter how much you guys want to think the stripper-customer relationship is all real, it is fantasyland, through and through. You don't need to know the stripper's real anything. Take whatever she tells you at face value and leave it at that. There is no point questioning her or anyone else about it.
As for one stripper dishing on others, don't be so sure she's telling the truth.
Just take it all for what it is: entertainment. Entertainers rarely expose the 100% truth about themselves to their audience. Why should they? It doesn't matter anyway. You enjoy the presentation they provide, so just leave it alone.
sexy_adriana
08-01-2009, 06:56 PM
I lie because I don't want the custys to know my personal info.
Earl_the_Pearl
08-01-2009, 07:29 PM
I lie because I don't want the custys to know my personal info.
In every club I’m know as Earl for the same reason; I don't want dancers or management to know my personal info. Even the people I see OTC that know my real name still call me Earl. My roommate of 14 months calls me Earl ITC.
There is no good reason a dancer has to know a PLs real information any more then a PL has to know hers.
audrey_k
08-02-2009, 07:05 AM
Most of the time, we don't lie to be malicious. Our name and other personal deets are off limits for obvious saftey reasons.
I swear it bugs me that some guys get so offended by this. We are trying to provide a FANTASY, so we tell you what we think you want to hear (we may not always guess correctly). It's not done out of meanness, we are trying to make you freakin happy!
Just get over it already.
One of my biggest pet peeves is customers who won't let the name thing go!
I now have a fake "real name." ::)
Shy_Guy
08-02-2009, 12:37 PM
^ You're cheeky ;)
BuxomBeauty
08-02-2009, 03:02 PM
I've also had a fake real name for years. But lately instead of using that I just refuse to answer and tell them it doesn't matter anyway because in reality I could tell them anything and it still wouldn't matter. Most give it up after that. The few who won't are time wasters anyway and I take my cue to move on.
Shy_Guy
08-02-2009, 03:42 PM
I really don't have an answer, but I wonder what the motivation is for wanting a dancer's real name. My two cents:
1. It's a way of getting the better of the game?
2. It's a way to get something "special." Something the other customers don't get.
3. ???
tikismall
08-02-2009, 04:13 PM
The name thing is always funny because I usually say "You wouldn't believe me anyway".
I think it makes people feel they have something more tangible from you.
I don't really lie about my age but I find it in a bad taste that men feel it's ok to ask a woman that question. I just don't respond anymore, I tell them "that's impolite" and smile a little, try to lighten the mood.
Or I say I am 69. lol!
devilkitty
08-03-2009, 11:25 AM
Oh my god so I'm almost 26 and Everyman is making me feel really old and gross.
minalynx
08-03-2009, 11:43 AM
I tell the truth but no one believes me (people always think I'm a lot younger). So I just go along with it. It's hilarious when I get carded at the front door to work. It's not a bad thing, though... ;)
audrey_k
08-04-2009, 05:11 AM
^I had a customer card me... lol....
JayATee
08-04-2009, 10:24 PM
A dancer told me she was 25. I have since learned (reliable sources) she is actually 22.
What's the point? 22 is actually more attractive to me (if age makes a difference at all) than 25. Why lie about this?
I just recently did this and it was really just for shock value. The guy thought I was 22 so to freak him out I was like "No Im waaaay older than that!" and when he asked how old I was I actually told him several years older than I really am. It was for no other reason than I wanted to fuck with his head.
Cyril
08-04-2009, 10:28 PM
I just recently did this and it was really just for shock value. The guy thought I was 22 so to freak him out I was like "No Im waaaay older than that!" and when he asked how old I was and I actually told him several years older than I really am. It was for no other reason than I wanted to fuck with his head.
Why would you want to fuck with someone's head? /:O
(Head is for thinking not ...)
JayATee
08-04-2009, 10:30 PM
^It's a vampire thing. You wouldn't understand. ::)
Earl_the_Pearl
08-04-2009, 11:48 PM
^It's a vampire thing. You wouldn't understand. ::)
I thought you were Goth.
JayATee
08-05-2009, 09:38 AM
^I am.
river
08-05-2009, 09:51 AM
why are you asking anyway? i don't get why men ask my age, does it matter? if a girl looks like she's 20something, than assume she is.
would you ask any other random woman u just met her age? probably not. Why-because it's considered rude. please extend dancers the same courtesy.
Earl_the_Pearl
08-05-2009, 01:33 PM
why are you asking anyway? i don't get why men ask my age, does it matter? if a girl looks like she's 20something, than assume she is.
would you ask any other random woman u just met her age? probably not. Why-because it's considered rude. please extend dancers the same courtesy.
Dancers and PLs are not a random man woman real world meeting. A women in a regular bar would not walk around nude expecting every man to give her money. Real world social propriety does not apply.
beautifuleve
08-05-2009, 07:23 PM
i used to work when i was 20
so i would lie about my age
so customers would by me drinks
i needed my 40% cut to help ease my bar tab fee
i refuse to tell my real name and where i'm from tho
i also lie about having a bf
it ruins the fantasy
and keeping my two lives seperate
makes things easier for me
ohiogirl26
08-05-2009, 07:34 PM
I am 29, but everybody always thinks I'm like 22,23ish. I still get carded everywhere.
I have been tempted to tell ppl that I'm 22, dunno why actually. Guess it's just trying to be younger or make ppl think I'm younger. I'm trying to avoid 30. Such a harsh number. Plus I feel old compared to the 20 yr old youngins running around.
lildreamer316
08-06-2009, 01:01 PM
Dancers and PLs are not a random man woman real world meeting. A women in a regular bar would not walk around nude expecting every man to give her money. Real world social propriety does not apply.
WOW. Just...wow.
So if you think that 'real world social propriety does not apply'; I definately do not want to be getting a dance with you.
*runs away*
Just kidding, but seriously, you need to think about that statement a bit. I'm just scared you already did.
sananeko
08-06-2009, 01:07 PM
^It's a vampire thing. You wouldn't understand. ::)
Lol I love you! I use to do that all the time. I might go back to that when I'm working again.
laurcon
08-06-2009, 01:41 PM
I understand what you're saying, but I could just as easily argue that any over-30 guy going in a club to buy naked young attention is a sleazeball...that's what most people think, anyway. But without them, the whole industry wouldn't exist. Being a particular type of sleazeball -- liking the younger and hotter ones of the dancers -- doesn't seem like much of a distinction to me. Just going in the club regularly makes us all sleazeballs, let's not split hairs.
over 30? like that's old? i can't stand when guys under 30 come into my club. although i shouldn't judge so much, my highest spender was 28. (dropped 48k in one night ::) )
i don't think its the age or income or appearance of guy that makes him sleazy, but his mindset and intentions.
Everyman
08-06-2009, 02:53 PM
WOW. Just...wow.
So if you think that 'real world social propriety does not apply'; I definately do not want to be getting a dance with you.
*runs away*
Just kidding, but seriously, you need to think about that statement a bit. I'm just scared you already did.
No, Earl is right. All kinds of socially off-limit topics are fair game in the strip club. From both parties.
Eerie this thread came up again, I was just talking to this girl today, she's now a fave, she says she started this when she was 18 because a dancer advised her to appear older. So she will often add +3 as a matter of habit.
Cyril
08-06-2009, 07:11 PM
^I am.
Just an FYI, there is a character of a goth stripper in Immaculate Love.
Pretty_Penny
08-06-2009, 11:08 PM
You know what I think is funny? I don't lie about my age. I'm 30. I say I'm 30... and while it's flattering that guys don't believe me... it's ANNOYING when they -insist- I'm lying.
So, don't let a few girls fibs make you think they all do it.
audrey_k
08-08-2009, 07:52 AM
My new favorite thing:
"take a guess!"
[in response to any number they give] "you're right! wow you're good!"
I am so sick of this damn question.
Elvia
08-08-2009, 07:35 PM
Dancers and PLs are not a random man woman real world meeting. A women in a regular bar would not walk around nude expecting every man to give her money. Real world social propriety does not apply.
Nor does it mean that there is no etiquette at all.
taylormadison
08-09-2009, 01:34 PM
I just started dancing. I tell everybody different ages when they ask. I don't ask anyone's age so why the fuck are they so concerned with mine? I tell one person one age and another person another age. It is a safety thing from customers who want to ask different people at the club personal info that is none of their business. It is difficult for someone to tell something they don't know. It is a job like anything else and it sucks when people feel like just because you're a dancer they're entitled to personal info. I wonder the last time somebody was concerned about how old the cashier at burger king was?
Elvia
08-09-2009, 01:41 PM
it sucks when people feel like just because you're a dancer they're entitled to personal info.
A-FUCKIN-MEN.
I'll repeat something I read in $pread (in an article about etiquette when interacting with sex workers)
You are buying a service, not a person. It doesn't give you the right to complete and total access to their world.
Everyman
08-09-2009, 04:21 PM
I wonder the last time somebody was concerned about how old the cashier at burger king was?
I wonder when the last time was that the cashier at burger king tried to sell anyone a sexual fantasy.
mediocrity
08-09-2009, 04:37 PM
I wonder when the last time was that the cashier at burger king tried to sell anyone a sexual fantasy.
In which case, do you care if we lie? Because I pass for 22 on a regular basis, and tell people they're right when they guess that.
Same with the "19 yr old cheerleader" girl. If she would have told you she was 19, when in fact she was 27, would that matter?
Oh and on the name thing; that's why I have a super realistic dance name. I haven't had anyone ask me that in months now. (same as my pen name)
taylormadison
08-09-2009, 06:40 PM
I wonder when the last time was that the cashier at burger king tried to sell anyone a sexual fantasy.
What does that have to do with the price of tea in China? In a sexual fantasy does the female show her birth certificate before you look at her breasts? It creeps me out that men feel entitled to know personal info about somebody who doesn't care anything about them. Do men feel like they should know the dancer's: address, phone number, social security number, date of last menstrual cycle, birth place, highest level of education completed, goals, family tree, and how many wild hairs up her ass? It is insane just because she provides a service that they of all people pay for, LMAO. It seems like more than a fantasy but an invasion of privacy. Do the porn stars get researched before one of their videos are bought or watched?
It's the entitled feeling that fuels some men to stalk dancers! If it's just a fantasy then let it be that. Once you start doing interviews with that fantasy dancer's co-worker to gather data that is none of your business you are crossing the line. If she wanted you to know she would of told you. Her reason can't be answered by anyone but her because it's her personal info not ours. Why would you not want to respect her privacy unless you don't respect her? The dancer that you interviewed probably doesn't know anything. I don't know her and I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw a pig so why would your fantasy dancer tell her anything worth knowing? It is pathetic how some dancers are so piss poor morally that they tell a custy another dancer's personal info. It is pure evil.
I would like to send a special thanks to all the dancers on SW that said,"Trust No One in the club."