View Full Version : I totally have to share with all of you...
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Djoser
09-27-2009, 10:16 AM
^But wouldn't a king be impressive?
That's what makes it so funny! It's so far off. :D
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:40 PM
(518): i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:41 PM
(858) Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:42 PM
(602) hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:42 PM
In line with another thread:
(717) Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:44 PM
(815) So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:44 PM
(843) By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
D'oh!
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:46 PM
(360) Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 10:55 PM
(909) so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 11:01 PM
Today, I learned to check inside the oven before you preheat it. Sometimes children hide their pet rabbit in there. FML
vmurphy252
09-28-2009, 11:02 PM
Today, after coming home from hanging out with a few friends, my mom told me that I shouldn't hang out with them any more. Why? Because "they are way hotter than I am and I'll never get a boyfriend if I'm always the ugly one in my group." FML
thecoffeeguy
10-04-2009, 02:13 AM
Can it get any weirder? Fox is going to make a series out of textsfromlastnight:
JayATee
10-04-2009, 12:23 PM
^Id like to know exactly how they're going to do this since most of the texts aren't what you would call prime time friendly.
xdamage
10-04-2009, 06:53 PM
^Id like to know exactly how they're going to do this since most of the texts aren't what you would call prime time friendly.
(843) By the way, your roommate is right. His BLEEP is much bigger than yours.
D'oh!
See? Works good! ;D
JayATee
10-04-2009, 07:20 PM
^LoL. Yah...
JayATee
10-04-2009, 10:17 PM
(225): He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
LoveSimone
10-04-2009, 10:35 PM
Wow, both these sites are great. Exactly what I needed to cheer me up, LOL. Thanks for posting them!
vmurphy252
10-05-2009, 09:03 AM
(313) No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
JayATee
10-05-2009, 09:23 AM
^ :rotfl: !!
vmurphy252
10-05-2009, 10:20 AM
Seemed fitting.
Laurisa
10-07-2009, 12:15 PM
www.lamebook.com
JayATee
02-26-2010, 12:51 PM
I'm reviving this to share this gem with all of you. I've never laughed so hard in my life.
(323):
You got in a fight last night?
(818):
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
(323):
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
JayATee
03-01-2010, 11:57 PM
(401):
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'