View Full Version : "I'm a customer." Turn on or turn off?
xdamage
07-15-2009, 05:37 AM
Some interesting/funny hypocrisies in here, lol.
I understand not thinking highly of the customers who are the extremes. Like the bar owner doesn't necessarily think highly of the drunk. And like bars, SCs are generally considered vices. It is possible to both be in a vice oriented business and still see extreme users are undesirable.
Otoh I less understand the reverse extreme, the one where anyone going on rare occasion is seen as a loser. Because the obvious implication is that if nobody ever went to a bar, then bar owners would be out of business. Likewise if nobody ever went to a SC, well...
That said I do understand it too, because what is being sold is something incredibly complex which goes to the root of who/what we are by nature. From that point of view the ambivlance makes complete sense. There are exceptions as with everything, but I can rewind my mind to say, 20 something, and it's not super rocket science to recall all of the ways in which my mind would quickly sift through potential mates. I really could very quickly and easily say yes, no, no, maybe... it only takes a few or very specific negatives for it to be a no.
Being a bit older now, it is more complex for me now. No or Yes? Nope. I factor in that I really don't know people immediately, from my initial impressions only, that people are imperfect, that just because they do something once doesn't mean they always do, and much more.
So yea, it does all make sense ;)
Almost Jaded
07-15-2009, 11:16 AM
I like that post. But I was referring primarily to two things: 1. Those posts in this thread which contradict themselves within the body of said post, and 2. those posts made by members which are at odds with their stated opinions/beliefs in other threads.
Not calling anyone out or intending to start any flames, merely expressing amusement at the fact that finding ones own opinion can often be more difficult than it would seem, and succinctly stating it - under different circumstances and in the differing lights of various questions - even more so.
Thus, my comment could also be construed as an abstract "this is people watching aat it's best". :)
More than ever, my mood listing as "amused" is accurate. :)
xdamage
07-15-2009, 12:10 PM
Understood. It touches on a bit of a sensitive area.
I guess one thing I learned is to be thankful someone is willing to do it.
I've never gone much, but the few times I have, spent quite a lot. Hey, SCs are a unique experience, but it is extremely complicated by the fact that human emotions, and bodies get involved. Very different from selling a product or neutral service.
Hopefully I've grown more tolerant with age, better able to accept human ambivalence, learning that yea, if I was a dancer chances are I'd feel much the same, on the one hand needing the money, on the other not necessarily thrilled with the customers. Makes sense. It just goes along with the somewhat unusual nature of the business I think and our human nature.
Peace and all that...
Otoki
07-16-2009, 05:18 AM
Understood. It touches on a bit of a sensitive area.
I guess one thing I learned is to be thankful someone is willing to do it.
I've never gone much, but the few times I have, spent quite a lot. Hey, SCs are a unique experience, but it is extremely complicated by the fact that human emotions, and bodies get involved. Very different from selling a product or neutral service.
Hopefully I've grown more tolerant with age, better able to accept human ambivalence, learning that yea, if I was a dancer chances are I'd feel much the same, on the one hand needing the money, on the other not necessarily thrilled with the customers. Makes sense. It just goes along with the somewhat unusual nature of the business I think and our human nature.
Peace and all that...
Meh. I think if you treat the dancer with respect, she's going to respect you in turn. If she doesn't, I think there are other problems already in place, and you can't do anything about that.
Earl_the_Pearl
07-16-2009, 09:52 AM
Meh. I think if you treat the dancer with respect, she's going to respect you in turn. If she doesn't, I think there are other problems already in place, and you can't do anything about that.
I don't go to a club for respect I wish more dancers would respect that no play no pay.
xdamage
07-16-2009, 10:37 AM
Meh. I think if you treat the dancer with respect, she's going to respect you in turn. If she doesn't, I think there are other problems already in place, and you can't do anything about that.
Can't disagree (double negative) with the respect point but yea, I think the topic question (asked in partial jest, due to the popular : Stripper, turn on or turn off? topic) is... 'is it a turn on or turn off to be a customer?' I.e., does being a customer turn on or turn off dancers (essentially, would you date/have-a-relationship with one)?
Respect? Sure, as much as any other business setting. But so far I haven't heard "yes, TURN ON!" (not surprisingly) and we have heard some "TURN OFF" answers. My point is, respect or not, it is easy to put yourself in their shoes and see why men who are SC customers are a turn off as far as potential BFs/Relationships, even if they are in the business. Just another case of ambivalence as far as I can see.
bluelight
07-16-2009, 11:13 AM
I WOULD NOT. no no no no no.
Earl_the_Pearl
07-16-2009, 12:09 PM
Can't disagree (double negative) with the respect point but yea, I think the topic question (asked in partial jest, due to the popular : Stripper, turn on or turn off? topic) is... 'is it a turn on or turn off to be a customer?' I.e., does being a customer turn on or turn off dancers (essentially, would you date/have-a-relationship with one)?
"...asked in partial jest..." little grasshopper you may now leave the mountain.
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/06/word_kung_fu1.jpg
I found it interesting that dancers became very defensive when PLs said they would not want a dancer for a partner knowing that dancers feel the same way about PLs. This thread became much more than I expected; a civil informative exchange between antagonists.
xdamage
07-16-2009, 01:04 PM
"...asked in partial jest..." little grasshopper you may now leave the mountain.
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/files/2009/06/word_kung_fu1.jpg
I found it interesting that dancers became very defensive when PLs said they would not want a dancer for a partner knowing that dancers feel the same way about PLs. This thread became much more than I expected; a civil informative exchange between antagonists.
LOL.
Well, the situation is complex. Roughly us (mostly) 40 somethings are paying to see the 20-30 something hot dancers; not the other way around. To the degree age and beauty are sexual attractors, it's not an equivalent question.
A part of me still can't fully get my head around that sex-workers and sex-worker patrons are antagonists to some degree, but I do understand it too. Why, since I can put myself (reasonably) in their shoes too (if I was 20, and a 40 something was the customer, how would I feel about being touched? etc.) Pretty easy to see ya, YUCK.
Otoh yea, I guess it's equally as hard to accept that some customers can use sex workers but then at the same time not think highly of them.
Both sides throw rocks at each other about this tension yet strangely need each other too since without customers there would be no SCs and vice-versa (if no women were willing to do the job... same thing see)?
So yea, an age old SW matter of tension that repeats itself in these threads periodically.
Otoki
07-17-2009, 01:30 PM
Can't disagree (double negative) with the respect point but yea, I think the topic question (asked in partial jest, due to the popular : Stripper, turn on or turn off? topic) is... 'is it a turn on or turn off to be a customer?' I.e., does being a customer turn on or turn off dancers (essentially, would you date/have-a-relationship with one)?
Respect? Sure, as much as any other business setting. But so far I haven't heard "yes, TURN ON!" (not surprisingly) and we have heard some "TURN OFF" answers. My point is, respect or not, it is easy to put yourself in their shoes and see why men who are SC customers are a turn off as far as potential BFs/Relationships, even if they are in the business. Just another case of ambivalence as far as I can see.
Well, let me put it this way. I don't find a SC customer to be a turn-off, as far as attraction goes. Of course, I'm very picky, but I've met maybe two people in my entire dancing career that I could see myself asking out if I was single. That's two people in 3.5 years. I think when I meet people at my work, I see them as a customer above anything else, because boundaries are so important.
Of course, if I met someone outside of the club and found out they frequent SCs, I don't see why that would be a turn-off./:O Even before I was a stripper, when i found out my boyfriend (who was my customer at a coffee shop:P ) liked SCs, I wasn't turned off at all.
In the end, as we said in the stripper thread, people are people, and I base my attraction on who they are, not just what they do.
femmefatale88
07-18-2009, 06:27 AM
I wouldn't, only cuz I'm happily married. Haha