Log in

View Full Version : whats the craziest thing you've done/seen at a strip club?



Pages : 1 [2]

Kellydancer
12-19-2009, 01:10 PM
These are extremely funny. Outside of the random dancer pissing in a garbage can, I haven't seen this much excitement.

The craziest thing I've ever seen (which pales to all these stories) is this. I briefly danced at a skanky club that hired anyone. I only took it because they paid all dancers and I needed money fast. When I say they hired anyone, I mean it. There was an overweight 50something woman, a really skinny crack dancer (who swung her arms and walked around the stage) and this one girl on the surface who looked normal. That is until she went to the stage. She went onstage with a joint in one hand, and a bag of booze in the other. So she gets on stage and proceeds to drink and smoke. Then she loses balance and falls off the stage. Second time she does this, same thing. But then she gets bored (I'm guessing) so she joins crack dancer on stage. Crack dancer was throwing her arms around and smacks this other dancer and she falls unto stage. Instead of dancing, she sits on the stage and drinks. Eventually she falls off the stage again. I asked the bouncer about her, and he said she had previously thrown up and gone to the bathroom on stage (luckily I missed this one). I left this club within a few weeks because it was a club more on selling drinks than selling dances. Though they paid me in cash, I was making less than I had at other clubs. With these kind of dancers, can you see why they were never packed?

PLAYAGIRL
12-20-2009, 03:48 PM
funniest thread:):)

anouk.oui
12-21-2009, 07:51 AM
I was on my back with my legs in a V in the air when a guy decided to lean over the stage (we have a 3 foot rule in my club) with me a foot off the 3 foot barrier and slap a dollar on my pussy.
.

i was doing the sam thing when the loser decided to poke my pussy with his sneaker so i fined and chucked him out.

had a guys pass out and throw up on himself on his bucks night and had all his friends come up to me saying its not your fault youre so gorgeous blah blah

freaky sub guy bought a private dance then asked if i could slap him and shove my gstring down his throat n choke him.

i was drunk n smoking outside when dude burnt me on the leg with his ciggie and though it was funny so i slapped him hard

saw a fight break out for awhile between some bikies that the dancers broke up sooner than lazy ass security stumbled in from outside

firemaiden04
12-21-2009, 11:25 AM
A girl at my club pissed herself while on the pole...

Saw a girl (wearing white) get her period onstage, like BAD, blood dripping down her leg and splattering on the stage, and she was just like, "*giggle* oops!" and FINISHED HER SET. She was on the tip rail shoving her blood soaked vag into guys' faces, seemingly totally oblivious. Then she finished her two songs and nonchalantly walks offstage without cleaning anything up. It was like a Monday night, there was no reason she couldn't have cut her set short.

Saw a girl whose "wanna dance" hustle was walking around to every guy in there on her first night and asking if they wanted a $30 blowjob.

Recently, saw one of our resident druggies burst into tears (like hysterically sobbing, really loud) at the bar because a customer who had tipped me and another dancer incredible money in the back didn't want a dance from her.

Years ago (I never work amateur night, for this very reason) had an amateur show up who I knew. She had this ugly home-dyed purple hair, and she was like, "Look, I dyed my armpit hair to match!" Everyone was like, "You can't go onstage like that," so she takes the pair of DR scissors and starts cutting her armpit hair off, and she keeps cutting herself and she's bleeding all over the place, and doesn't seem to care. Then she went onstage, and her set consisted of her crawling around acting like a dog in heat. Literally. Like making whimpering noises and pretending to hump stuff really fast, etc.

nicole84
12-21-2009, 11:45 AM
saw a couple fights, saw one girl go down on another in the dressing room, and i used to work with oen girl who came to work with her house arrest ankle bracelet on, lol. she tried to make it pretty by putting little crystals on in the shape of a heart. God she was trash.

DesuvsDeath
12-23-2009, 01:52 PM
saw a couple fights, saw one girl go down on another in the dressing room, and i used to work with oen girl who came to work with her house arrest ankle bracelet on, lol. she tried to make it pretty by putting little crystals on in the shape of a heart. God she was trash.
One of the clubs I've worked at off and on for a few years normally hires... at least decent girls...
But one summer... there were like 3-4 girls who all got in trouble around the same time walking around with these on. Our dayshift must've looked SO trashy. /fail.

MackenzieD
12-23-2009, 05:51 PM
OMG these stories are insane! Name another profession where head and shooting are just part of the daily drama.

I first started going to the one club in our city because my BF was the DJ, so when I'd hang out on a Saturday night I was generally out of harm's way, but got to see a lot of the action both during and outside business hours. The things that stick out in my mind are:

A girl setting her hair on fire by accidentally lying down on a lit candle during a pageant.

The same girl falling off the pole one night and getting carried away on a stretcher.

During another pagent a girl who didn't even work at the club, bent over a customer's lap during her set, and we were like "uuuhhh, where is this headed?" and she came back up with his leather belt and started flogging audience members

A custy getting kicked out, then ramming his car into the doors of the club. (that really helped his cause, as you can imagine)

A guy asking me to have a lap dance with him, BF was cool, I agreed, but only if my two friends would come as well (I was friends with the dancer and wanted to help her hustle a little, LOL), and he agreed and paid her for all three of us and him for several dances.

A small-time celebrity coming into the club, thinking he's top shit and insistenly banging on to one of the dancers, engaged and with a child, that he's really into oriental women so she should go home with him.

During a buck's show, where the girls sometimes spray the buck with glitter spray, a guy started having an asthma attack and stopped breathing.

Two dancers in the space of a year dancing until they were at least 8 months pregnant. In a club where on even the busiest night there were only 7 or 8 dancers.

Twice I saw (not-even-good-looking) random drunk chicks brought up on stage to strip...ugh.

After the renovation of the club and some highly unflattering UV strobe lights put in, a girl who everyone pretty much despised going on stage with some newly UV glowing TP stuck to her bits.

And the usual tables thrown during fights, coke on the bar (and rubbed on chick's pussies), girls doing a triple dump of e's before shifts (swallow snort shove..yes up there...), finding e's/speed on the floor, having joints in the carpark after work, sex in the toilets, etc etc et al.

Oh those were the days! I love drama where I can watch from a safe distance!

and my one self-caused drama, getting maggoted on vodka and giving my bf head in the DJ booth (the booth is not even private at all in retrospect, it sits on a kind of mezzanine and doesn't really have a door or wall), having a huge fight with him and falling down the stairs next to the stage in lucite heels, screaming to the point that the dancer on stage actually stopped to watch me and him because none of the customers were watching her anyway...ohh shame.

Corey
12-25-2009, 02:34 AM
anonymous man takes shit in club parking lot.
somehow, this happened without any one seeing (on a bright summer afternoon).
mound of shit eventually begins to attract staff attention.
i arrive at work early and drive directly into shit.
entire staff watches in shock as i open my door.
i am confused as to why the entire staff is standing outside watching me with open mouths.
i see the mound.
i begin to cry.

I'm so sorry that happened to you, but I just can't stop laughing:eek::rotfl::rotfl:

This is a strange holiday for me, but your little story lifted my spirits. Just sorry it had to be you.

tinydancer85
01-18-2010, 06:39 PM
-I wear glasses in normal everyday life (I'm nearsighted) but when I work at the club I go without because honestly what the hell do I need to see far away for? lol ANYWAYS one night I'm up in VIP and there's a girl dancing across from me for a woman and man, the woman is wearing a long skirt but she keeps pulling it up to expose her dark panties. Well I'm looking at them while I'm grinding on my customers lap and the girl is like rubbing herself on the woman's crotch, and I'm thinking well at least she's wearing underwear. Well I go to get up and I realize that the woman isn't wearing underwear that dark underwear I *thought* she was wearing is actually her overgrown bush :O :no: Soooo gross!!!

-There was this girl who was wearing two blood soaked g-strings on stage, who was clearly on something. This was the 3RD TIME she was fired, its like why rehire someone who is so f-ed up all the time back???

-I had a customer request I walk on his face (I didn't wear my heels for this) I just made him lay on the ground while I squished his face/nose with my foot and just walked all over him. Weirdo.

-Watched a girl in the dressing room searching in her bag only to pull out a huge gold dildo and say "You never know when this will come in handy" uhhhh okay???

-Seen a group of ppl get maced by bouncers, that was brutual!!! A lot of them were just innocent bystanders.

-I wasn't at the club for this, but a customer had a heart attach in the bar and ended up dying in the dressing room. He was getting a lap dance prior and just started clutching his chest, they rushed him to the DR but no one knew what to do, went into cardiac arrest and no one administered CPR so he died.

-Gave a little person lap dances because all the girls in the club wouldn't touch him because he was a dwarf and had small limbs and hands...I ended up dancing for him and he was really nice and gave me $100 for 3 dances, so he tipped me a extra $25. I will say it was strange to see a child size hand kinda caress my boob lol

-I've seen too much sucking, fucking, eatting out, finger banging, jerking off to last me a life time.

-A girl in the dressing room bends over for everyone to see her fui fui and asks "Can you see the string?" I so did not want to see her cookie that up close and personal...:P

-Saw a dancer do a back roll right off the stage, funniest shit EVER!!

-Had a sub customer who enjoyed being called FIFI, and loved to be smacked, also I should add he was fat, and balding...and a very powerful attorney lol

Harleigh HellKat
01-23-2010, 05:17 PM
OMFG... I'll have to add my own stories to this once I'm sure that prying eyes are no longer prying. (BF's parents made a profile on here. YEAH)

I'll just say that I have fond memories every time I think about tater tots and Twilight lunchboxes.

Austinrox
09-15-2010, 12:41 AM
I dressed as a nun once and danced to "down with the sickness" :D I thought it was freakin GENIUS, but I am silly like that sometimes

Daniela87
09-21-2010, 05:15 AM
I'd not been working long at my current club, maybe a few weeks and I don't think most of the dancers liked me that much. Anyway, there's this girl who works there who's always getting customers to buy her drinks - its not uncommon for her to be paralytic by the end of the night. So she goes on stage to do her set and stumbles a bit as she starts. Two minutes in and she's using the pole like there's no tomorrow - and then suddenly she's not, she's flown off the stage nearly into a customer's lap, crumpled face down in a heap on the floor and not moving. And neither is anyone else.

Now I'd not been at the club long, I didn't really know what is supposed to happen in a situation like this. But I'm certainly not gonna stand there like a lemming. So I leap off the customer I'd been talking to and run towards the slowly assembling crowd around this poor girl screaming for them to give her some space.

Kneeling beside her I gently open her mouth with the tips of my fingers and look inside under the club's dim lights. No obstruction - but there is alot of blood. Hold my cheek to her lips and look down her chest. Her breathing is laboroured but there.

"Hey sweetie", I say to the nearest customer to her, "Today you're gonna save someone's life. You're gonna take your mobile and leave the club and call 112. You're gonna tell them you need an ambulance, and you're gonna give them the address of the club. Then you're gonna ask them how long its gonna be until they arrive and you're gonna come back and tell me. You got it? Good." Customer looks completely boggled by this prospect but nods, takes out his mobile and nearly runs to the door.

By this time one of the doormen had worked out that something wasn't right and come over to investigate, narrowly avoiding being run over by the fleeing customer. I told him to keep me and the dancer from being overwhelmed by the mob of people who had begun to assemble around us and began the secondary survey. Luckily, she seemed fine - unconscious, but no broken or twisted bones, and she wasn't bleeding apart from her tongue and some minor cuts on her arms and legs where she'd broken a glass.

I ask one of the other customers to tell the d.j. to turn down or off the music and, with the help of the bouncer and another dancer who was supposed to be doing her set, manage to get the girl into the recovery position without getting too much blood everywhere. She came to a few minutes later, and a few minutes after that the emergency services arrived.

The girl didn't work at the club much after that. But once everyone realised I knew my shit about first aid, I never had any trouble making friends. :-)

4everresolutions
09-21-2010, 08:53 PM
Well, last night I'm walking out of the VIP and I see a guy on the couch completely bound by duct tape. I discovered this the same time as the manager. Manager wasn't pleased. Apparently the dancer just walked away when the songs he paid for was up, and he was stuck there.......

I was LOLing inside.

MissLucy
11-24-2010, 11:06 AM
1. Guy complaining to bouncer about a shit smear on his white shirt;
2. Guy eats out stripper onstage, up & leaves. Ten mins later another guy comes in, sits down & eats the SAME stripper. Onstage. Not even a courtesy wipe. That'll leave a bad taste in your mouth...
3. Toilet paper particles on the ass/coochie of a stripper "pussy poppin' on a headstand"

Fucking eew. :ill:

Hahahaha, I know its gross but I cannot stop laughing. This truly made my week!

I wish I could have seen something comparable to that. Too funny!

JenniKat
11-24-2010, 11:53 AM
saw a couple fights, saw one girl go down on another in the dressing room, and i used to work with oen girl who came to work with her house arrest ankle bracelet on, lol. she tried to make it pretty by putting little crystals on in the shape of a heart. God she was trash.


Sorry, I thought the heart made it kind of pretty. Didn't know it bothered you so much ::)

LexyNYC
12-07-2010, 02:43 AM
- I have been paid for a lock of my hair when I was a redhead; same guy came in a few days later and offered me $200 to spit into a film canister. I declined.


I almost cried reading that. That is too friggin funny.

AmyLynne
12-10-2010, 11:22 AM
I took X before a pole dancing competition- not a good thing to do!

pixierocksonthepole
12-10-2010, 09:02 PM
^^Uhhh no lol I would think not. what a display that must've been lol