View Full Version : Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm
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Earl_the_Pearl
11-13-2009, 10:23 PM
I was put off by my boyfriend using the term, but he's European, and 9 years older, so I got used to it. But it really used to give me the creeps, especially after I heard a few custies using it, "asking me, "let's make love?" even though I had just me them. Gross.
I'm a European American and like to make love. I find younger women a bit shocked until they let go and let Earl. The older women know what Earl is for; it's all good. :propeller
Elvia
11-13-2009, 10:27 PM
I wish there was a better way to put it. Something between "making love" and "fucking." But not so basic and clinical as "have sex."
Earl_the_Pearl
11-13-2009, 10:35 PM
I wish there was a better way to put it. Something between "making love" and "fucking." But not so basic and clinical as "have sex."
I do all three at once with proficiency; or so I've been told. Food, flowers, massive exchange of body fluid and three children in four years. So I have been told no DNA proof as of yet.
laurcon
11-14-2009, 02:26 AM
I wish there was a better way to put it. Something between "making love" and "fucking." But not so basic and clinical as "have sex."
duh, ever heard of "making whoopie" or are you too ignorant of meaningless entertainment popular before your time?? ::)
laurcon
11-14-2009, 02:28 AM
I'm a European American and like to make love. I find younger women a bit shocked until they let go and let Earl. The older women know what Earl is for; it's all good. :propeller
is there a puke face? honestly, i can't take it when my stomach physically turns. i'm putting this poster on ignore, can we all do the same and pretend he's still banned???
:grouphug:
JayATee
11-14-2009, 04:23 PM
is there a puke face? honestly, i can't take it when my stomach physically turns. i'm putting this poster on ignore, can we all do the same and pretend he's still banned???
:grouphug:
It was Cyril that was banned (unfortunately not permanently) but I've had Earl on ignore for a long time and Im a much happier person for it. ;)
Elvia
11-14-2009, 07:22 PM
^^^ Earl was recently banned for about 3 days. I had no idea Cyril was.
Earl_the_Pearl
11-14-2009, 07:30 PM
is there a puke face?
http://msn.mess.be/data/thumbnails/21/Vomit.png
KiwiStrawberry Splenda
11-15-2009, 10:54 AM
I'm a European American and like to make love. I find younger women a bit shocked until they let go and let Earl. The older women know what Earl is for; it's all good. :propeller
Haha. I'm a European European, and in my native language, we only have two terms for it, that are pretty much equivalent to "fucking" and "making love."
Earl's posts literally make me gag, I throw up a little when I hear his 60 year old ass talk about cheap sex with young hookers. Sick.
KiwiStrawberry Splenda
11-16-2009, 10:18 AM
Cheap sex with young, dumb, disadvantaged hookers at that. I don't think the girls paying him for a van ride in lieu of saving for a car, or fucking him for $100, have had an easy life, or any self-esteem.
Earl_the_Pearl
11-16-2009, 06:28 PM
Cheap sex with young, dumb, disadvantaged hookers at that. I don't think the girls paying him for a van ride in lieu of saving for a car, or fucking him for $100, have had an easy life, or any self-esteem.
First of all none of them are "dumb" they are all independent without a handler so their self esteem is just fine; I chose my friends carefully. Every dancer I have interacted with was better for it; financially, emotionally and sexually. It is when we must part that they are sad. :'(
kittygirl
11-16-2009, 09:52 PM
Earl, show me the puke face again.
Please?
jack0177057
11-17-2009, 09:31 AM
Sorry Jack, I like you- I'm not directly picking on you or hatin' on your style.
Like I said, I'll use whatever phrase gets me laid, whether its "make-love", "nail", "fuck", "bang", "knock-boots", "screw", "impale", "discipline", "ravage", etc. I don't care what you call it, as long as you let me do it to you.
With my current GF, we alternate between "making-love" (leisurely, tender and pampering) and "fucking" (quick, rough and sleazy).
KiwiStrawberry Splenda
11-17-2009, 12:13 PM
"impale", "discipline", "ravage".
These are my faves, wish my man would use such terms. }:D
Lola_sinn
11-17-2009, 02:34 PM
Like I said, I'll use whatever phrase gets me laid, whether its "make-love", "nail", "fuck", "bang", "knock-boots", "screw", "impale", "discipline", "ravage", etc. I don't care what you call it, as long as you let me do it to you.
With my current GF, we alternate between "making-love" (leisurely, tender and pampering) and "fucking" (quick, rough and sleazy).
I like the way you think }:D
JayATee
11-17-2009, 02:47 PM
^^^ Earl was recently banned for about 3 days. I had no idea Cyril was.
Yes still as a matter of fact.
Like I said, I'll use whatever phrase gets me laid, whether its "make-love", "nail", "fuck", "bang", "knock-boots", "screw", "impale", "discipline", "ravage", etc. I don't care what you call it, as long as you let me do it to you.
With my current GF, we alternate between "making-love" (leisurely, tender and pampering) and "fucking" (quick, rough and sleazy).
Ok... so "love making" is this long drawn out process for you and "fucking" is quick rough and sleazy? Wow... we are from completely different worlds.
mediocrity
11-17-2009, 03:12 PM
Nah, Cyril is re-banned, much to my delight.
jack0177057
11-17-2009, 06:36 PM
Ok... so "love making" is this long drawn out process for you and "fucking" is quick rough and sleazy? Wow... we are from completely different worlds.
Well, "fucking" is very physically demanding and you heat-up very quickly. You can't do it more than 30-40 minutes, not the way we do it.
"Love making" can be much longer than that, because it's slow and soothing (like taking a bath or shower together, erotic massages, body kisses, etc.).
My current GF is not into "disciplining", but that would be somewhere in between, as far as duration.
mediocrity
11-17-2009, 06:39 PM
Haha. Oh man. Every dude I am with can ditch the slow and soothing. I don't have patience for that. }:)
Soothe me afterwards with a cigarette and a gory movie.
dlabtot
11-17-2009, 07:24 PM
Haha. Oh man. Every dude I am with can ditch the slow and soothing. I don't have patience for that. }:)
Soothe me afterwards with a cigarette and a gory movie.
I hear you, even if it starts slow and soothing it ain't gonna stay that way for long, lol
JayATee
11-18-2009, 12:16 AM
Well, "fucking" is very physically demanding and you heat-up very quickly. You can't do it more than 30-40 minutes, not the way we do it.
"Love making" can be much longer than that, because it's slow and soothing (like taking a bath or shower together, erotic massages, body kisses, etc.).
My current GF is not into "disciplining", but that would be somewhere in between, as far as duration.
LoL the way you do it? :rotfl:
I'll leave the "love making" to you Jack. I have less than no desire to be "soothed" during sex.
mediocrity
11-18-2009, 02:07 AM
I do all three at once with proficiency; or so I've been told. Food, flowers, massive exchange of body fluid and three children in four years. So I have been told no DNA proof as of yet.
Whoa. You are quasi-disowning your kiddos???
Intense.
Ugh...I envy women who have orgasms...im only 19,but I have lost all hope. Maybe I had a orgasm ONE time which is when I lost my virginity. And I don't like my clit touched...it seems painful and guys tend to be rough. Size matters for me...I too need to feel deep penetration. I don't really care for oral...actually I take that back I don't like it. Im more of a mentally stimulated kinda gal though. I keep telling myself I'll buy a vibrator but I haven't. I try to watch Dr.Sue for tips on having a orgasm....but hey maybe its just the guys...I like older men but have had sex with only two older men...if 27/28 counts (im 19) and it was actually really good...but I don't think I climaxed.
I read/heard (don't remember) somewhere that there are orgasms that come in little "spurts" they literally last for seconds then go away. You can have multiple "spurts" with out realizing it was a orgasm. Maybe I have felt this b4. Also I hate when men think a finger up my ass during penetration will make me orgasm or even fucking feels good.
Also I squeez my vaginal muscles during sex....should I just relax to achive a orgasm/climax? But I have also wondered why it hurts for my clit to be touched/rubbed...but if it is pressed on with my hood covering it that's feels somewhat okay?
jack0177057
11-18-2009, 09:10 AM
LoL the way you do it? :rotfl:
Yeah, like this -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K45o6hEY97Y
jack0177057
11-18-2009, 09:27 AM
Haha. Oh man. Every dude I am with can ditch the slow and soothing. I don't have patience for that. }:)
My dear Ms. Mediocrity, with a little discipline and training... you'll learn to be patient...
If you're a goth chick, replace "slow and soothing" with "slow and painful"...
carmen_b
11-18-2009, 09:40 AM
^Send the slow and soothing men to me.
mediocrity
11-18-2009, 02:21 PM
Ugh...I envy women who have orgasms...im only 19,but I have lost all hope. Maybe I had a orgasm ONE time which is when I lost my virginity. And I don't like my clit touched...it seems painful and guys tend to be rough. Size matters for me...I too need to feel deep penetration. I don't really care for oral...actually I take that back I don't like it. Im more of a mentally stimulated kinda gal though. I keep telling myself I'll buy a vibrator but I haven't. I try to watch Dr.Sue for tips on having a orgasm....but hey maybe its just the guys...I like older men but have had sex with only two older men...if 27/28 counts (im 19) and it was actually really good...but I don't think I climaxed.
I read/heard (don't remember) somewhere that there are orgasms that come in little "spurts" they literally last for seconds then go away. You can have multiple "spurts" with out realizing it was a orgasm. Maybe I have felt this b4. Also I hate when men think a finger up my ass during penetration will make me orgasm or even fucking feels good.
Also I squeez my vaginal muscles during sex....should I just relax to achive a orgasm/climax? But I have also wondered why it hurts for my clit to be touched/rubbed...but if it is pressed on with my hood covering it that's feels somewhat okay?
Chickie, everyone is different. Lube might help, along with a very light touch. Some men do tend to be rough and I'll be goddamned if a dude ever stuck his finger up my ass. I'd kill him. Sounds like you need some more caring sexual partners to be patient and experiment with you.
JayATee
11-18-2009, 03:22 PM
If you're a goth chick, replace "slow and soothing" with "slow and painful"...
Painful? Yes. Slow? No thank you. Not interested. It's boring. And if you're boring in bed Im going to look for someone who isn't. Guaranteed.
jack0177057
11-18-2009, 04:18 PM
Painful? Yes. Slow? No thank you. Not interested. It's boring. And if you're boring in bed Im going to look for someone who isn't. Guaranteed.
Got it... Fast, hard and painful... }:D I aim to please...
lestat1
11-18-2009, 09:10 PM
Please forgive what is about to be a stupid question born from my own limited experience...
So many women tend to require clitoral stimulation (mouth, tongue, and fingers I assume) as opposed to vaginal penetration to achieve orgasm. My personal experience (relying on oral sex and fingers to satisfy her first) and much of what I've read on here on the subject, however, indicate that penetration leading to orgasm is a requirement for seeing a man as sexual capable, and for the sexual encounter in general to be satisfying and acceptable. These two thoughts contradict theselves somewhat and I'm back to being clueless. Help?
carmen_b
11-19-2009, 01:51 AM
Stat: You've got it right ! Most women require clitoral stimulation. I've been drinking and can't articulate this well, but somewhere along the line there was this idea passed around that orgasms through penetration are superior. That's just silly. Stick to your plan of getting her off via the clit because there is a 70-80% chance that the clit will do it for her ( really ..... I think I read that somewhere ...I'm not just pulling it out of my ass ) . Women who don't need direct clitoral stimulation are in the minority.
carmen_b
11-19-2009, 01:57 AM
http://www.webmd.com/sex/want-better-orgasms
http://www.femaleclitoralstimulationtechniques.com
JayATee
11-19-2009, 08:27 AM
Please forgive what is about to be a stupid question born from my own limited experience...
So many women tend to require clitoral stimulation (mouth, tongue, and fingers I assume) as opposed to vaginal penetration to achieve orgasm. My personal experience (relying on oral sex and fingers to satisfy her first) and much of what I've read on here on the subject, however, indicate that penetration leading to orgasm is a requirement for seeing a man as sexual capable, and for the sexual encounter in general to be satisfying and acceptable. These two thoughts contradict theselves somewhat and I'm back to being clueless. Help?
I think the answer really is that it depends on the girl you're with. I know that's not entirely helpful but that's where communication comes into play. You have to know your woman I guess.
Doesn't sound like you're doing anything wrong though!
jack0177057
11-19-2009, 11:50 AM
Just because a girl can't climax from vaginal penetration, does not mean she doesn't enjoy it.
Also, its not all about physical pleasure, there are the psychological and emotional components. Maybe the girl can't climax with penetration, but she wants to feel "ravaged" by the guy. She wants him to take her, subdue her, penetrate and dominate her. She likes him "masculine" and rough. Or,... alternatively, she likes to use the power of her vagina to dominate him. She gets on top of him and uses her vagina to subdue him. There is a little bit of sado-masochism in everybody.
If she's in love with him, she want him inside of her,... it's biological.
I also ask myself this - If vaginal penetration is not pleasurable to women, why do they buy dildos and vibrators? The adult toy stores carry hundreds of them in all sizes, material and colors.
But, like JayATee said, it depends on the girl you're with. There's too many variations. The biggest mistake a guy can make is to assume that what one girl likes will be fun for another girl.
carmen_b
11-19-2009, 01:42 PM
^ Good thoughts.
No one is saying penetration isn't pleasureable ( and you've listed a great rundown proving that it is! ).
We were talking specifically about climaxing ( which most women can't do without getting the clit involved ) .
The whole point of this thread it that there isn't a "right" way or a superior way for a woman to come. It's unfortunate that there are STILL men running around who think it's superior to have a woman come through just penetration. It sucks for those of us whose bodies aren't wired that way.
Basically ....... just learn what work for her and give her what she needs!
Elvia
11-19-2009, 03:15 PM
I also ask myself this - If vaginal penetration is not pleasurable to women,
Did anyone say this?
jack0177057
11-19-2009, 05:05 PM
No one is saying penetration isn't pleasureable
Did anyone say this?
Okay, let me rephrase my question - If you cannot orgasm from penetration, why do girls buy 7 and 8-in dildos and vagina vibrators? Why not just a clit vibrator?
Is the non-orgasmic pleasure of penetration essential or non-essential? To make things simple, I'm specifically asking about a girl and her sex toys (leaving out the man from the equation).
JayATee
11-19-2009, 05:13 PM
Okay, let me rephrase my question - If you cannot orgasm from penetration, why do girls buy 7 and 8-in dildos and vagina vibrators? Why not just a clit vibrator?
Is the non-orgasmic pleasure of penetration essential or non-essential?
You're analyzing way too much here which is why you're having a problem. We like penetration because it feels good. Even if orgasm isn't the goal. There are lots of times I didn't cum. Doesn't mean the sex wasn't mind blowing.
You're analyzing way too much here which is why you're having a problem. We like penetration because it feels good. Even if orgasm isn't the goal. There are lots of times I didn't cum. Doesn't mean the sex wasn't mind blowing.
I agree. Orgasm and climax are so much more complex for women, not just physically but mentally as well, and they're not necessarily the main goal. I don't think men grasp this.
JayATee
11-19-2009, 05:26 PM
I agree. Orgasm and climax are so much more complex for women, not just physically but mentally as well, and they're not necessarily the main goal. I don't think men grasp this.
They don't. I can't tell you how many times my husband has been upset with himself because I didn't orgasm and I have to explain for the 100th time that I don't care lol.
I mean obviously, if it happened ALL the time there would be a problem.
jack0177057
11-19-2009, 05:45 PM
It's unfortunate that there are STILL men running around who think it's superior to have a woman come through just penetration.
Well, I pay a lot of respect and well-deserved attention to the clit and I do give my GF clitoral orgasms, but I'm also guilty of seeking the holy grail of g-spot orgasm... I gave up on this quest many years ago, but just recently picked up a couple of books that look very legit, and started this quest anew:
Female Ejaculation: Unleash the Ultimate G-Spot Orgasm (http://www.amazon.com/Female-Ejaculation-Unleash-Ultimate-G-Spot/dp/1569756791/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1258676651&sr=8-9) by Somraj Pokras and Ph.D. Jeffre Talltrees
Unleashing Her G-Spot Orgasm: A Step-by-Step Guide to Giving a Woman Ultimate Sexual Ecstasy (http://www.amazon.com/Unleashing-G-Spot-Orgasm-Step-Step/dp/1569755639/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1258676722&sr=1-7) by Donald L. Hicks
The g-spot "myth" is a very long-lived and strong myth and I don't think its been entirely refuted. You can find videos that show female ejaculation from g-spot orgasm and it does look like a more powerful orgasm. Those few women that do experience it on a regular basis swear that it is better than a clitoral orgasm.
Does it really exist - yes.
Is every woman capable of having it? - Probably not.
So, how many woman are capable of having it, but don't know it yet? - That's the six million dollar question.
There's been numerous moments during penetration that went like this -
Girl - OMG, what did you do?... That felt incredible!... You must have hit my g-spot!
Me - Okay, I'll do that again...
Girl - Waiting... Waiting... Waiting...
Me - I'm doing it,... you feel that?
Girl - No.
Me - But, that's the same thing I did a second ago!
Based on what I am reading, the penis is the wrong instrument to use. The best way to reach the g-spot and stimulate it is with the fingers.
jack0177057
11-19-2009, 05:50 PM
We like penetration because it feels good. Even if orgasm isn't the goal. There are lots of times I didn't cum. Doesn't mean the sex wasn't mind blowing.
I agree. Orgasm and climax are so much more complex for women, not just physically but mentally as well, and they're not necessarily the main goal. I don't think men grasp this.
We can't grasp that concept because, for us, climaxing is the main goal and our heads would explode if we didn't climax.
KiwiStrawberry Splenda
11-19-2009, 08:48 PM
Based on what I am reading, the penis is the wrong instrument to use. The best way to reach the g-spot and stimulate it is with the fingers.
Yup.
Also, a lot of vibrators are stealthy penis shaped because men designed them that way. Its only in the last few years that natural curve type vibes came out, and they are pretty rad.
http://www.natural-contours.com/IBS/SimpleCat/InfoPage/asp/Comp_ID/19521.html
Earl_the_Pearl
11-20-2009, 12:15 AM
Yup.
Also, a lot of vibrators are stealthy penis shaped because men designed them that way. Its only in the last few years that natural curve type vibes came out, and they are pretty rad.
OK this is a throw down; Earl has the one and true "natural curve" and challenges any and all mechanical love machines. Any dancers name the time and place. :crossfing
^^^^^ Sick. Nobody wants to see your white bush down there.
ArmySGT.
11-20-2009, 01:01 AM
I wish there was a better way to put it. Something between "making love" and "fucking." But not so basic and clinical as "have sex."
Fucking make sex?
Earl_the_Pearl
11-20-2009, 01:11 AM
^^^^^ Sick. Nobody wants to see your white bush down there.
It is shaved smooth as it makes the penis look bigger; think of a giraffe feeding on the savanna as opposed to poking its neck above bushes . My hair is a light brown and shall remain for the rest of my life; as demonstrated by my father who at 87 had brown hair.
So now we know what you are thinking about and what you have seen. :covereyes
It is shaved smooth as it makes the penis look bigger; think of a giraffe feeding on the savanna as opposed to poking its neck above bushes . My hair is a light brown and shall remain for the rest of my life; as demonstrated by my father who at 87 had brown hair.
So now we know what you are thinking about and what you have seen. :covereyes
I've never seen it, and I never will trust me. But that's how I envision it would look
Earl_the_Pearl
11-20-2009, 03:02 AM
I've never seen it, and I never will trust me. But that's how I envision it would look
If you truly look like your avatar you do not have to envision; you may vision with extreme pleasure. :wave: