View Full Version : Dear customers
Elvia
12-18-2009, 10:16 PM
I don't think someone who came to the U.S. when they were three would likely still have an accent. I know people who immigrated when they were older children than that that have no accent at all.
Just sayin.'
Golden_Rule
12-18-2009, 11:58 PM
^^^^^ Exactly. I will charge the maximum amount that I think I can get away with.
Nothing wrong with that. Finding a maximum profit potential of the commodity you are selling is pretty much standard in any sales game
Most guys are total clueless suckers.
Underestimating the intelligence of your customers though can, I didn't say always, equate to shooting yourself in the foot from a business perspective.
I know, sometimes the truth hurts. :'(
I try to remember that is a sword that can cut both ways.
Earl_the_Pearl
12-19-2009, 03:30 AM
I don't think someone who came to the U.S. when they were three would likely still have an accent. I know people who immigrated when they were older children than that that have no accent at all.
Just sayin.'
Don't even start; read my post again and remain silent.
Earl_the_Pearl
12-19-2009, 03:34 AM
I try to remember that is a sword that can cut both ways.
Well it depends on how sharp and stiff the sword iz.
Side note; are you going to be in Central Jersey for Valentines Day?
mediocrity
12-19-2009, 02:41 PM
So when you tell me your are from Brazil and I say hola como estas you can answer me in Spanish?
I could, but I'd correct you and say "sim, mas em Brasil, nos falamos o portugues."
Admittedly Portuguese is not one of the seven I can effectively swear in. I had several Brazilian friends in Atlanta who taught me several actual phrases.
Elvia
12-19-2009, 09:26 PM
Don't even start; read my post again and remain silent.
No, I read your post. I just don't understand why you said "and she didn't have an accent." When there's no reason she would.
Earl_the_Pearl
12-19-2009, 09:46 PM
No, I read your post. I just don't understand why you said "and she didn't have an accent." When there's no reason she would.
It was way more than not having an accent. I know people that came here when they were in their 20s and don't have an accent. She thought they spoke Spanish in Brazil and then did not know a word of Spanish.
Funny thing the same night a Brazilian dancer pretended she could not speak a word of English that does happen often though. She indicated she wanted a drink; I asked her if she would rather have the $10 and suddenly she spoke English.
chris91
12-20-2009, 12:50 AM
It was way more than not having an accent. I know people that came here when they were in their 20s and don't have an accent. She thought they spoke Spanish in Brazil and then did not know a word of Spanish.
don't pretend like you don't know what elvia is saying. You may be kind of a jackass, but you're not stupid.
Hopper
12-20-2009, 02:50 AM
^Where were you when I needed you?
Elvia
12-20-2009, 02:52 AM
This obviously Jersey Girl told me she was borne in Brazil and adopted when she was three by an American family. She had no accent
I am not saying that the girl wasn't lying. It did seem to me that Earl thought she should have an accent, or else, why mention the fact that she doesn't?
This probably doesn't warrant all this attention.
chris91
12-20-2009, 11:42 PM
^Where were you when I needed you?
I couldn't read all that stuff. It was too boring. Plus, when I don't feel like reading something, I just assume that Elvia is right. She seems to always agree with me.
Hopper
12-21-2009, 04:16 AM
^You didn't wait for this one to get boring.
anouk.oui
12-21-2009, 05:57 AM
on the note on pennys starting question and FUCKING MANNERS, someone please explain to me the thought process of this prized loser:
was doin a private dance [on a small stage in the private room] for a dude who looked like he jus turned legal who needed constant reminding no u cant touch me, no i wont date you etc
for the brief times i way dancing with my legs apart he would lean forward enough to almost rub me with his nose. he does this about 4 times each time i warn him, he does it again
im fed up so i softly put my heel on his chest and push him back to the upright position
he thinks it would be funny for him to shove his dirty sneaker in my lady box. and giggles like its some great mutual joke. i fine him and kick his as out
but really. in the real world you wouldnt do it, on the beach, to ur gf, etc so what suddenly makes it acceptable to shove a foot in a dancers vagina????? it is beeeeyond bad manners and really pissed me off.
really. really.
Pretty_Penny
12-21-2009, 10:11 AM
^really, there's no other answer than:
He doesn't view you as a person and he thinks the way he's behaving is acceptable and hilarious.
Golden_Rule
12-21-2009, 03:57 PM
Well it depends on how sharp and stiff the sword iz.
Side note; are you going to be in Central Jersey for Valentines Day?
Could be. Why, what's up?
anouk.oui
12-21-2009, 09:10 PM
^really, there's no other answer than:
He doesn't view you as a person and he thinks the way he's behaving is acceptable and hilarious.
no im probably just portable $80 naked foot cosy.
i hate men who think theyre funny..... they never are
Hopper
12-22-2009, 01:32 AM
^When some people are out on the town, in a SC or regular club, they aren't worried about acceptable or unacceptable. They just like to do stupid things for fun, the stupider the more fun. They feel anonymous in a crowd or away from their own turf and they don't mind pissing on someone else's. They think of other people around them as less like people and more like part of the scenery. Most people have this tendency to some degree, at least when they are younger. Your problem is compounded by the erotic nature of your job, which means that's the kind of attention you are going to get from these people.
Don't look for a reason.
Pretty_Penny
12-22-2009, 10:41 PM
That's really fucking sad. Also, I think a lot less of the population is like that than you think. My friends never treat people like "part of the scenery" because they need to "let loose".
Hopper
12-23-2009, 12:42 AM
^Only the real jerks do stuff as bad as the kind of thing you are complaining about, and do it frequently. They would also be more likely to do it in SCs where there is more opportunity and it's an explicitly sexual environment. The kind of things other people might do would be relatively harmless and not routinely.
Christyismyalias
12-23-2009, 01:51 AM
The more guys push me, or test me, the less I give them. You get a much better experience the nicer you treat me, and it sounds like many of the girls on here work in the same way.
Unfortunately, many girls at the clubs don't work this way and let these guys get away with whatever, even succumbing to these men and their forceful ways. I've been in rooms with girls where the guy basically manhandles them and they just take it. When a guy manhandles me, I back off and keep my distance, if it continues and I give a warning and then I leave. It is never appropriate for a man to be rough on a women. I don't get why they do it, but it is becoming more common and it is disturbing.
We just have to take a stand against these men.. Not allow them to get away with this bullshit. Hopefully other girls will get it together.
anouk.oui
12-24-2009, 02:00 AM
yeah like if its a slap on the boob or ass or other areas i can handle that. but a foot? in a pussy? do u not see how ridiculous that sounds? people probably dont do that to thai hookers then why me. its completely stupid, cop a feel with your hand instead
gameover
12-30-2009, 09:09 PM
I don't think the guys who grope us realize that they are doing anything wrong. We're not people to them. The dancer is like a vending machine, and the sex act is like the candy bar stuck inside. They feel they've paid for the candy bar, and they will shake the machine until it comes out. If they break the machine, it's no big deal, because objects don't have feelings.
I'm not excusing when they do that.
But let's face it, they call it "strip tease', and a lot of dancers try to sell a dance that promises more than are actually planning to do. the guy wanted the candy bar. You'd probably be pretty upset if you thought you had paid for the candy bar, but the candy bar got stuck on on one of those spiral metal things and didn't drop out of the machine. Maybe you shouldn't oversell the candy bar, and set VIP expectations realistically.
chris91
12-31-2009, 02:07 AM
I'm not excusing when they do that.
But let's face it, they call it "strip tease', and a lot of dancers try to sell a dance that promises more than are actually planning to do. the guy wanted the candy bar. You'd probably be pretty upset if you thought you had paid for the candy bar, but the candy bar got stuck on on one of those spiral metal things and didn't drop out of the machine. Maybe you shouldn't oversell the candy bar, and set VIP expectations realistically.
I think you're missing the point, which is that these customers see us as inanimate objects. They think we are vending machines, but we are not.
We are different from vending machines in that we are alive, and in that we do not sell candy bars. I don't have a sign on me that says, "Insert $40 to purchase ass fingering". I do not walk up to guys and say, "Are you ready for a grope fest?" I ask if they are ready for a lapdance. They assume that they are paying for a grope fest. They don't ask, they just assume.
In any other situation where they were purchasing something from a person, they would ask for a refund, complain about it, or resolve to become a better informed shopper. With us, they try to forcibly take what they think they've paid for, because we are objects.
Yes, some girls do make promises they have no intention of keeping. Most don't, but even the ones that do don't deserve to be assaulted. Being ripped off for a few bucks is not a good reason to rape someone. Buyer beware.
Hopper
12-31-2009, 05:37 AM
^Most men know the difference between a SC and a brothel, which is the only place they could expect to pay to finger a girl. Most men know that strippers tease as part of an act, not to actually offer sex.
However, some men also think that strippers are really whores who are willing play along with their fantasies. Some strippers actually do.
Phil-W
12-31-2009, 06:56 AM
...these customers see us as inanimate objects. They think we are vending machines, but we are not...
Because a lot of customers have difficulty in distinguishing fantasy from reality.
I have (for a fair few years now) given a number of dancers lifts home from venues. You don't have to be Sherlock Holmes to see the dancers know and trust me, and every now and then someone starts a conversation on the subject. Tends to run on the lines of:
"Do you know X_____?"
"Yes, I've come to give her a lift home."
Customer looks up at the stage where X_____ is whizzing round the pole....
"Lucky bast*rd - she's horny as hell. How can you handle having her in the car with you?"
The customers are definitely not stupid, but they seem incapable of understanding that behavior in the venue does not equate to behavior outside of it.
And hence part of the answer to Pretty Penny's original question: because a proportion of customers assume a dancer's ITC behavior is the way she behaves outside of it, they assume she's sexually free and easy and won't object to (or will even like) being the subject of a gropefest.
And thence part of the problem: take away the illusion that dancer's ITC behavior is the way she behaves OTC, and you've taken away a significant motivation from a good percentage of the customers that come into venues. I'm sure a significant number of customers fantasize about dancers giving them similar lap dances outside of work, and thence onto having sex with the dancer.
Wiser/more realistic customers will realize it is exactly that - a fantasy. Less realistic (or more predatory) customers will try to turn fantasy into reality, either by importuning for extras or by trying to force the dancer to physically comply with their fantasy.
...the blame does need to be shifted a bit, but not onto either the dancers or, completely, on the customers who are insisting on this contact.
Part of the blame; in fact a decent-sized part of it; falls (in this order) on the owners, managers and bouncers/floormen in an establishment where this happens. If the club's policy is no touch/no grind; then the owners->managers->floorman's job is to uphold and enforce that.
Exactly right - there will always be a percentage of dancers who (rightly or wrongly) tolerate a gropefest. And there will always be idiot or predatory customers who will try to start one.
But ultimately it comes down to the people that run the venues. I know venue owners who encourage high degrees of contact because they believe it pushes up their profits. And I know venue owners who play strictly by the rules.
And, on average, I'd say the cleaner, better run establishments are doing better these days. That's because they have more customers than the venues that are run like sleaze pits.
So, if you're an owner you have the choice as to whether to run a clean establishment or not. High contact does not equal high profits.
And low contact means less customers coming in with the expectation of a gropefest....
Phil.
Pretty_Penny
12-31-2009, 09:18 AM
And hence part of the answer to Pretty Penny's original question: because a proportion of customers assume a dancer's ITC behavior is the way she behaves outside of it, they assume she's sexually free and easy and won't object to (or will even like) being the subject of a gropefest.
That still doesn't explain why they KEEP trying to manhandle you after you push them away or tell them to stop. What you're saying only explains why they try in the first place.
Also, on the theory of low contact clubs bringing in less of these people, I work in a very low contact club and I deal with this constantly. I don't lead guys to believe anything is going to happen, either.
Phil-W
12-31-2009, 11:05 AM
That still doesn't explain why they KEEP trying to manhandle you after you push them away or tell them to stop. What you're saying only explains why they try in the first place.
True - to keep on trying after a firm NO indicates a total lack of respect for a dancer. (And even to try in the first place speaks volumes about the personal ethics of that customer....)
Unfortunately there are a significant minority of SC customers that are misogynists. And those are the douchebags that keep on trying. Beyond that, I don't have a better explanation.
Sorry....
Also, on the theory of low contact clubs bringing in less of these people, I work in a very low contact club and I deal with this constantly. I don't lead guys to believe anything is going to happen, either.
I'll defer to your experience on this, but in the best run low contact club in my area this does not just happen. The owner just will not tolerate mistreatment of his dancers.
The last time I was in the place, a dancer came out of one of the private dance booths and complained to one of the bouncers she had been bitten on the boob. The customer was frogmarched out of the place within a minute.
And when it's known that's what'll happen, guys don't even try.
Phil.
gameover
12-31-2009, 04:02 PM
I think you're missing the point, which is that these customers see us as inanimate objects. They think we are vending machines, but we are not.
We are different from vending machines in that we are alive, and in that we do not sell candy bars. I don't have a sign on me that says, "Insert $40 to purchase ass fingering". I do not walk up to guys and say, "Are you ready for a grope fest?" I ask if they are ready for a lapdance. They assume that they are paying for a grope fest. They don't ask, they just assume.
In any other situation where they were purchasing something from a person, they would ask for a refund, complain about it, or resolve to become a better informed shopper. With us, they try to forcibly take what they think they've paid for, because we are objects.
Yes, some girls do make promises they have no intention of keeping. Most don't, but even the ones that do don't deserve to be assaulted. Being ripped off for a few bucks is not a good reason to rape someone. Buyer beware.
Outside the club, you are a person. Inside the club, you kinda are an object. How much are we supposed to get to know the "person" after a brief "wanna dance" variant?
But, I'm all for refunds on dances I don't like :)
Of course I'm not saying that anyone deserves to be assaulted. i'm always careful to make sure a dancer and I expect the same level of contact. But I can tell you that a lot of dancers over-promise on the dances, especially in areas with lots of tourist traffic, like Vegas.
And i think part of the problem is that what a "lap dance" means can vary quite a bit. Some dancers are very hands on, while others don't like contact. the problem is, if the guy had a hands on girl previously, his understanding of what "lap dance" means may be very different from yours, and you're probably not providing what "lap dance" previously meant to him, based on previous dances, so he may still feel ripped off.
Phil-W
01-01-2010, 01:27 AM
And i think part of the problem is that what a "lap dance" means can vary quite a bit. Some dancers are very hands on, while others don't like contact. the problem is, if the guy had a hands on girl previously, his understanding of what "lap dance" means may be very different from yours, and you're probably not providing what "lap dance" previously meant to him, based on previous dances, so he may still feel ripped off.
Yeah, but to pick up on Pretty Penny's point, that explains the first attempt to make an inappropriate degree of contact, but not subsequent attempts after the dancer has made it clear what's being attempted is outside her comfort zone.
It all comes back to predatory customers who are going to continually try to touch/assault the dancer despite the dancer making it clear it's unwelcome.
And that makes that type of customer a pretty unpleasant individual....
Phil.
chris91
01-02-2010, 12:07 AM
Outside the club, you are a person. Inside the club, you kinda are an object. How much are we supposed to get to know the "person" after a brief "wanna dance" variant?
I am most certainly not an object. Now, I do expect to be objectified at work, but only to a certain degree. You don't have to get to know a woman at all to know that she doesn't want to be treated like a blow up doll. It's safe to assume that nobody wants to be treated that way.
But, I'm all for refunds on dances I don't like :)
Of course I'm not saying that anyone deserves to be assaulted. i'm always careful to make sure a dancer and I expect the same level of contact. But I can tell you that a lot of dancers over-promise on the dances, especially in areas with lots of tourist traffic, like Vegas.
And i think part of the problem is that what a "lap dance" means can vary quite a bit. Some dancers are very hands on, while others don't like contact. the problem is, if the guy had a hands on girl previously, his understanding of what "lap dance" means may be very different from yours, and you're probably not providing what "lap dance" previously meant to him, based on previous dances, so he may still feel ripped off.
We are talking about guys who continue to grab after being told no. It doesn't matter what other girls do or promise. I am not those other girls. You can tell that I am not, because I look and sound different from other girls.
If one bartender makes you a really strong drink, do you go to other bartenders expecting them to over-pour too? When they don't, do you get pissed off and start grabbing bottles from behind the bar? Of course not. If you buy a used car and find out later that it's a lemon, do you go back to the dealership and punch the salesman in the face? Of course not. In any other setting, this kind of behavior is clearly unacceptable.
There is absolutely no excuse for touching me after I have told you to stop. None. You feel ripped off, you want to get your moneys worth, you think I was deceptive, whatever. When I say, "You can't touch me.", you stop touching me. If you don't, then you are a scumbag. If you feel that you are being ripped off by a lot of dancers, then you may want to examine whether or not you are a scumbag. Scumbag customers will attract scumbag dancers.
mediocrity
01-02-2010, 03:05 AM
I am most certainly not an object. Now, I do expect to be objectified at work, but only to a certain degree. You don't have to get to know a woman at all to know that she doesn't want to be treated like a blow up doll. It's safe to assume that nobody wants to be treated that way.
We are talking about guys who continue to grab after being told no. It doesn't matter what other girls do or promise. I am not those other girls. You can tell that I am not, because I look and sound different from other girls.
If one bartender makes you a really strong drink, do you go to other bartenders expecting them to over-pour too? When they don't, do you get pissed off and start grabbing bottles from behind the bar? Of course not. If you buy a used car and find out later that it's a lemon, do you go back to the dealership and punch the salesman in the face? Of course not. In any other setting, this kind of behavior is clearly unacceptable.
There is absolutely no excuse for touching me after I have told you to stop. None. You feel ripped off, you want to get your moneys worth, you think I was deceptive, whatever. When I say, "You can't touch me.", you stop touching me. If you don't, then you are a scumbag. If you feel that you are being ripped off by a lot of dancers, then you may want to examine whether or not you are a scumbag. Scumbag customers will attract scumbag dancers.
This happened to me for the first time in a long time last Sunday, of all places, at the stage.
Guy comes up with a dollar and proceeds to grab me. I tell him to stop, he can't do that. You know what he says to me? "Yes I can. I know what the rules are here and what girls do." I tell him no AGAIN, and he rolls his eyes and snatches at me again. He was a lot stronger than I, and I had to try and yank his hands off me no less than six times, while I pleaded with my eyes at the DJ (who is also the man I am in love with), who was watching with a mixture of shock, disgust and anger. He cut the song short.
My club is usually really good about this, but the manager was in the back at the time and didn't see it.
I was walking in VIP, the same guy beckons me over. I went over to tell him what was what, and he shoved his hands up my dress saying "I just want to touch your ass, come on!" My bad for going over there, but I did end up ripping him a new asshole and threatening to kick him out.
So what did he do? Apologised profusely, and then asked me to find him some blow.
What a class act. I got him tossed out.
gameover
01-02-2010, 09:16 AM
I am most certainly not an object. Now, I do expect to be objectified at work, but only to a certain degree. You don't have to get to know a woman at all to know that she doesn't want to be treated like a blow up doll. It's safe to assume that nobody wants to be treated that way.
We are talking about guys who continue to grab after being told no. It doesn't matter what other girls do or promise. I am not those other girls. You can tell that I am not, because I look and sound different from other girls.
If one bartender makes you a really strong drink, do you go to other bartenders expecting them to over-pour too? When they don't, do you get pissed off and start grabbing bottles from behind the bar? Of course not. If you buy a used car and find out later that it's a lemon, do you go back to the dealership and punch the salesman in the face? Of course not. In any other setting, this kind of behavior is clearly unacceptable.
There is absolutely no excuse for touching me after I have told you to stop. None. You feel ripped off, you want to get your moneys worth, you think I was deceptive, whatever. When I say, "You can't touch me.", you stop touching me. If you don't, then you are a scumbag. If you feel that you are being ripped off by a lot of dancers, then you may want to examine whether or not you are a scumbag. Scumbag customers will attract scumbag dancers.
I agree that there is no excuse for him touching you after you said no. What I was trying to say was that at least part of what leads to that type of customer behavior, is the behavior of other dancers with customers.
If the dancers and/or club adhered to the same standards for a lap dance, there would be less of that behavior from customers.
I say less, because I also think that you'll still see this behavior because some customers are using dancers to take out their issues/hostilities with women. I think clubs will always attract a certain number of those, no matter what.
Oh, and to respond to your analogies. If someone bought a used car that was a lemon, would you go punch the dealer? No, but you aren't factoring in alcohol. If the guy was drunk, he might.
Similarly, in the club, a guy whose been drinking can have wildly different behavior than when sober. I've known people that were as nice as could be when sober that were mean as heck when drunk.
So, when you approach the guy whose had too much to drink, you are approaching a two-headed serpent. On the one hand, his judgment is lowered/impaired and he may spend more than he should. On the other, he may try to maul you.
chris91
01-02-2010, 05:11 PM
I agree that there is no excuse for him touching you after you said no. What I was trying to say was that at least part of what leads to that type of customer behavior, is the behavior of other dancers with customers.
I think that what leads to that kind of behavior is growing up with a mother who never taught you any manners, being born stupid, or being generally an asshole. There are plenty of guys who don't turn into sociopaths in the clubs, and they have been exposed to the same dirty dancers as the dudes who do.
If the dancers and/or club adhered to the same standards for a lap dance, there would be less of that behavior from customers.
That's true, but there would still be some, and we'd still be talking about it.
I say less, because I also think that you'll still see this behavior because some customers are using dancers to take out their issues/hostilities with women. I think clubs will always attract a certain number of those, no matter what.
Oh, and to respond to your analogies. If someone bought a used car that was a lemon, would you go punch the dealer? No, but you aren't factoring in alcohol. If the guy was drunk, he might.
Similarly, in the club, a guy whose been drinking can have wildly different behavior than when sober. I've known people that were as nice as could be when sober that were mean as heck when drunk.
So, when you approach the guy whose had too much to drink, you are approaching a two-headed serpent. On the one hand, his judgment is lowered/impaired and he may spend more than he should. On the other, he may try to maul you.
Excuses, excuses. Booze doesn't temporarily turn people into dicks. It exposes them for what they've really been all along.
starz86
01-03-2010, 01:38 PM
if u are a peice of shit guy and acts semi normal when he is sober then he will be a dick when he is drunk.they show the real them when they are drunk so screw them!
There are true colors on both sides of the aisle ::)
FBR
Elvia
01-03-2010, 07:25 PM
Excuses, excuses. Booze doesn't temporarily turn people into dicks. It exposes them for what they've really been all along.
Thank you. Just what I was going to say. If alcohol turns someone into a sexual predator, I tend to believe they had some element of that in them already. If someone really loses control so much when they drink that they feel they can't control an urge to assault people, they need to stop drinking and probably need to get some serious psychological help as well.
Also, I've heard that alcohol intoxication has long since been ruled out as a legal defense for sexual assault, among other crimes.
chris91
01-03-2010, 11:30 PM
Also, I've heard that alcohol intoxication has long since been ruled as a legal defense for sexual assault, among other crimes.
Please tell me you meant to say ruled out as a defense.
All I know is that I've been shitface drunk many times, and I never broke a bottle over a customers head. Not even when he clearly deserved it. Now, I have been known to say some bitchy stuff to people when I'm drunk, but that's because I'm naturally bitchy.
Elvia
01-04-2010, 02:00 AM
^^^ whoops, yes. I meant ruled out. typo corrected.
gameover
01-04-2010, 07:56 PM
All I know is that I've been shitface drunk many times, and I never broke a bottle over a customers head. Not even when he clearly deserved it. Now, I have been known to say some bitchy stuff to people when I'm drunk, but that's because I'm naturally bitchy.
That's good to know. All I was saying is that people react to alcohol in different ways. I was in a frat, and I saw plenty of Jeckyl and Hyde behavior at parties before and after people had been drinking. Just because you don't become violent, doesn't mean others don't.
I'm not saying being drunk is a legal defense. I am saying that it impairs judgment, and that one should approach someone who has had too much to drink with caution, and not be surprised when they behave inappropriately during a lap dance.
chris91
01-04-2010, 11:08 PM
That's good to know. All I was saying is that people react to alcohol in different ways. I was in a frat, and I saw plenty of Jeckyl and Hyde behavior at parties before and after people had been drinking. Just because you don't become violent, doesn't mean others don't.
I'm not saying being drunk is a legal defense. I am saying that it impairs judgment, and that one should approach someone who has had too much to drink with caution, and not be surprised when they behave inappropriately during a lap dance.
Yeah that's a great idea, except that my crystal ball doesn't really fit in the purse that I carry at work, so I have no way of knowing that someone has had too much to drink until it is too late.
Are you drunk right now? Is your judgment impaired? Is that why you think it's appropriate to say "Well, what did you expect?" to women who are complaining about being sexually assaulted?
gameover
01-05-2010, 04:39 PM
Yeah that's a great idea, except that my crystal ball doesn't really fit in the purse that I carry at work, so I have no way of knowing that someone has had too much to drink until it is too late.
Are you drunk right now? Is your judgment impaired? Is that why you think it's appropriate to say "Well, what did you expect?" to women who are complaining about being sexually assaulted?
I don't think I ever suggested "Well, what did you expect?".
But it is the most I think I've ever been insulted on a single thread. Let's see, scumback, drunk, judgment impaired.... But ladies, there are still plenty available. You can still accuse me of kicking puppies, being a communist, and not liking apple pie. :O
And in the meantime, you can keep selling dances to drunk guys, and wonder why you are getting mauled. And no, I don't think it requires a crystal ball. You tell me you work in a bar, and you can't tell when a guy is drunk?
chris91
01-05-2010, 04:59 PM
I don't think I ever suggested "Well, what did you expect?".
But it is the most I think I've ever been insulted on a single thread. Let's see, scumback, drunk, judgment impaired.... But ladies, there are still plenty available. You can still accuse me of kicking puppies, being a communist, and not liking apple pie. :O
I never called you anything. You're just being dramatic.
And in the meantime, you can keep selling dances to drunk guys, and wonder why you are getting mauled.
That sounds an awful lot like "well, what did you expect?" to me.
And no, I don't think it requires a crystal ball. You tell me you work in a bar, and you can't tell when a guy is drunk?
Sure I can tell when a guy is drunk, if he is slurring or stumbling, but not all drunk guys do those things. Even then, I can't tell if he is the kind of guy who gets drunk and becomes a groper until it's too late.
Even if I could always tell when a guy is drunk, I can't just stop selling dances to drunk guys. It's a ridiculous thing to suggest. Should I also stop selling to sober guys? Sober guys can get gropey too, you know.
gameover
01-05-2010, 05:14 PM
Sure I can tell when a guy is drunk, if he is slurring or stumbling, but not all drunk guys do those things. Even then, I can't tell if he is the kind of guy who gets drunk and becomes a groper until it's too late.
Even if I could always tell when a guy is drunk, I can't just stop selling dances to drunk guys. It's a ridiculous thing to suggest. Should I also stop selling to sober guys? Sober guys can get gropey too, you know.
Or, you could change jobs. Maybe librarian? I've heard that's pretty low on the gropage scale. How does your hair look in a bun? :P
mediocrity
01-05-2010, 08:46 PM
Or, you could change jobs. Maybe librarian? I've heard that's pretty low on the gropage scale. How does your hair look in a bun? :P
Duuuuude. For real?
You Know Me
01-05-2010, 09:15 PM
Or, you could change jobs. Maybe librarian? I've heard that's pretty low on the gropage scale. How does your hair look in a bun? :P
"Sitting at her desk with her back very straight, she asks the young man very politely, the one who always comes into the library to check out bestsellers, asks him when it was he last got laid. He lets out a weird sound and she says shhh, this is a library. She has her hair back and the glasses on but everyone has a librarian fantasy, and she is truly a babe beneath.
I have a fantasy, he says, of a librarian." (57-58)
Elvia
01-05-2010, 09:18 PM
Or, you could change jobs. Maybe librarian? I've heard that's pretty low on the gropage scale. How does your hair look in a bun? :P
You still want to insist you're not basically saying "what do you expect?"
gameover
01-05-2010, 09:33 PM
You still want to insist you're not basically saying "what do you expect?"
No, I just started getting annoyed and decided to be a smart a**
1st_samurai
01-05-2010, 10:08 PM
Guys will pay for girls time, and girls will pay for guys time. I'm sure there are girls drooling over the chippendales and the same thing is happening there, although guys paying for girls attention significantly outweighs the opposite situation.
hot4ablackchick
01-05-2010, 11:00 PM
I don't think I ever suggested "Well, what did you expect?".
But it is the most I think I've ever been insulted on a single thread. Let's see, scumback, drunk, judgment impaired.... But ladies, there are still plenty available. You can still accuse me of kicking puppies, being a communist, and not liking apple pie. :O
And in the meantime, you can keep selling dances to drunk guys, and wonder why you are getting mauled. And no, I don't think it requires a crystal ball. You tell me you work in a bar, and you can't tell when a guy is drunk?
If a guy is stumbling all over the place and is obviously phucked up on something, I personally will avoid this type of person. There have been times where I didn't realize at the initial 'wannadance' that this custy was sooo wasted, and there are those few kinds of people who never seem to be as phucked up as they are.
Anyway the issue is not drunk guys who had too much to drink and get gropey. This is blatant disregard for a dancer's rules. Nearly every night I work there is at least one custy who just doesn't seem to give a fuck when I tell him the rules. They are not drunk, wasted guys either. Some are men who are not even drinking alcohol. I have accepted that there will be those kind of men no matter what we do or don't do. There will never be an answer as to why someone would think it is ok and I really don't care to understand it. If a guy sucks, I'll collect and move on. While I know that this is an 'occupational hazard' it still makes a guy a degenerate-asshole-loser-chauvinist pig, with little respect for women if I tell him "Do not touch my boobs," and he grabs them anyway. Yes it will happen and I accept that it will, but it doesn't make it okay because we chose this job.
Hopper
01-06-2010, 02:02 AM
It is not justified, but you really can't avoid it. As for why it happens, all the dancers seem to be arguing that it is because the offenders are assholes. So why are you still speculating about it? Are you curious about the psychology of assholes?