View Full Version : Why are Women Attracted to Married Men
WestCoast101
02-20-2010, 11:28 PM
Its simply a logical (though nonpolitically correct) extension of what Richard Dawkins and others have been saying for years., and far more promising than the traditional and often nonsensical theories of "female low self esteem" to explain such matters. Obviously its an opinion but based upon reason and common sense. Evolutionary psychology nearly always has an element of speculation and conjecture as one is dealing with 3 to 5 million yrs of man's development.
WestCoast101
02-20-2010, 11:46 PM
By the way traditional explanations in regards to the above matters generally have as an implicit core belief the idea that the bulk of modern women are for the most part products of dysfunctional backgrounds wallowing in a sea of low self esteem and condemned forever to relive over and over again issues arising from poor parenting, nearly always focused on the paternal (Bad Daddy) side of the equation.
Primordial based explanations of female desire though usually shouted down by feminists (because they purportedly give license to nonmonogamous male behavior) actually are a bit more enlightened.
Jessie_tinydancer
02-21-2010, 12:36 AM
I'd love you know which university apparently got your degree in biology from there, westcoast.
I'm interested to know who gave westcoast a thesaurus. I was hoping perhaps the same person could teach him how to use it or at least punctuation if he is insistent on using them big ol' words to make his posts look all smart and whatnots. Pssss... westcoast... your posts stop making sense..literally.
yoda57us
02-21-2010, 12:52 AM
Pssss... westcoast... your posts stop making sense..literally.
I agree...but that doesn't seem to stop him from posting them.
WestCoast101
02-21-2010, 10:25 AM
^^ Because you're touting all this as fact like you're the Grand Pubah of Popular Science.
Ps. I went over this with Marv. Either's mediocrity or it's the stage name. Pick one. Even my man doesn't call me baby.
FYI the term "baby" is very frequently used as a point of emphasis, having nothing to do with calling a woman "baby."
One of 1000's of examples, 2 male skydivers just landed after a freefall jump.
A says to B "man you cut that close, what 2"?
B "1800 baby"
chris91
02-22-2010, 04:01 PM
FYI the term "baby" is very frequently used as a point of emphasis, having nothing to do with calling a woman "baby."
One of 1000's of examples, 2 male skydivers just landed after a freefall jump.
A says to B "man you cut that close, what 2"?
B "1800 baby"
FYI, most women do not like to be called baby by strange men, regardless of how the word is used in other situations. If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that.
DesuvsDeath
02-22-2010, 04:04 PM
What sort of idiot wants to date someone who is clearly a cheating whore?
"Hello. I am willing to cheat on my current wife. Would you like to be my girlfriend so I can cheat on you?"
No. No thanks.
Kellydancer
03-01-2010, 12:10 PM
I am irritated that guys are trying to say what women want. Btw, I am not attracted to alpha males. Never have been. Many women are the same way. Sure, when I was younger I wanted the hot guy who maybe was a player because I wasn't looking for anything serious. However, once I got older and looked for serious relationships I wanted the guy who will be monogamous. I personally don't know any women who want a married guy as a partner except for maybe an affair or in the event where they find out he's married. I briefly dated a guy who was married and once I found out I ditched him. Luckily it was only two dates and it's why I don't do online dating anymore.
FYI, most women do not like to be called baby by strange men, regardless of how the word is used in other situations. If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know that.
When I did online dating years ago I automatically deleted guys who called me "baby", "babe", "broad" "chick" or anything else like that. If a guy says that, I've found that he doesn't think too highly of women to begin with.
Almost Jaded
03-01-2010, 12:54 PM
While I believe that the members here who have taken offense at the term "baby" are to a larger extent justified, I will, in the interests of fairness all around, point out 2 things:
1. - WestCoast explained his use of the term as that of the common slang; somehow several members have overlooked this even when quoting his explanation. There is a use of the term "baby" that isn't pejorative or demeaning to women, that is common in American and English slang. Examples (and for teh sake of making the point, the person addressing the hypothetical me here is male) - "Hey AJ, where do you live?" "Vegas, baby!" Or another example that I've used several times in real context at autocross events - "Hey AJ, I just ran a 42.385 that last lap, I'm going to catch you! What's your best clean run of the day so far?" "42.286 baby!" or "42.286 - you better find your braking points 'cuz I'm only gonna get faster baby!" WC indicated that his use of the term was in this context. Let us all lament the limits of a textual format where the nuance of intonation are unavailable. ;)
2. - In a related but unrelated subtext, I personally find it VERY amusing that dancers would take umbrage at this term. A dead giveaway that a girl I'm meeting for the first time is or has been a dancer is the consistent use and overuse of "baby", "sweety", "sugar", "honey", and the like in normal conversation. Some people do this anyway, but because conversations ITC rarely use first names, I find that a girl who spends a lot of time in said clubs as a dancer tends to carry this over OTC a LOT. It was actually my most recent exes pet peeve, and is something MM and I joke about all the time. Bartenders or cocktail waitresses are also guilty, lol.
Kellydancer
03-01-2010, 01:21 PM
While I believe that the members here who have taken offense at the term "baby" are to a larger extent justified, I will, in the interests of fairness all around, point out 2 things:
1. - WestCoast explained his use of the term as that of the common slang; somehow several members have overlooked this even when quoting his explanation. There is a use of the term "baby" that isn't pejorative or demeaning to women, that is common in American and English slang. Examples (and for teh sake of making the point, the person addressing the hypothetical me here is male) - "Hey AJ, where do you live?" "Vegas, baby!" Or another example that I've used several times in real context at autocross events - "Hey AJ, I just ran a 42.385 that last lap, I'm going to catch you! What's your best clean run of the day so far?" "42.286 baby!" or "42.286 - you better find your braking points 'cuz I'm only gonna get faster baby!" WC indicated that his use of the term was in this context. Let us all lament the limits of a textual format where the nuance of intonation are unavailable. ;)
2. - In a related but unrelated subtext, I personally find it VERY amusing that dancers would take umbrage at this term. A dead giveaway that a girl I'm meeting for the first time who knows where is or has been a dancer is the consistent use and overuse of "baby", "sweety", "sugar", "honey", and the like in normal conversation. Some people do this anyway, but because conversations ITC rarely use first names, I find that a girl who spends a lot of time in said clubs as a dancer tends to carry this over OTC a LOT. It was actually my most recent exes pet peeve, and is something MM and I joke about all the time. Bartenders or cocktail waitresses are also guilty, lol.
In the first instance you mentioned, I don't find that offensive at all. If someone said that in that context I wouldn't be offended at all. The second case reminds me of places here where the waitress will call female customers "honey", "sugar" or something like that. That doesn't bother me at all, and it's common when I've met people from the South. They don't mean it as demeaning. Now when I was dancing, I didn't like to be called those names, but for the most part ignored it if the guy was tipping. It's strange because in a club if a guy called me a broad, I just brushed it off, but if a guy called me a broad in a non club setting (just to use one word) I'd either walk out or tell him not to. I think it's because I expect that as a dancer, as a regular woman I find it demeaning.
jack0177057
03-01-2010, 02:11 PM
^^^ While we're on the topic of political correctness -
(1) Is "hot babe" also offensive? What about "hotty"?
(2) Is calling a woman a "girl" offensive?
(3) Is calling women "guys" offensive? (As in - "What are you guys up to?" - When said to a group of women.)
I usually adopt the dancer's terms - if she calls me "sweety" (most common term in the SC), then I'll call her "sweety"... etc.
Kellydancer
03-01-2010, 02:28 PM
^^^ While we're on the topic of political correctness -
(1) Is "hot babe" also offensive? What about "hotty"?
(2) Is calling a woman a "girl" offensive?
(3) Is calling women "guys" offensive? (As in - "What are you guys up to?" - When said to a group of women.)
I usually adopt the dancer's terms - if she calls me "sweety" (most common term in the SC), then I'll call her "sweety"... etc.
1) Depends on the context. If someone called me a hot babe (though not likely now that I am older) in an environment not dancing, then yes. I don't appreciate being called a babe. Am I offended being called a hottie? Once again depends. If it was by a guy I liked I wouldn't be offended. If it was at a non dancing job? I'd be offended.
2) Depends on the situation. I don't care if I am called a girl, but if someone then calls males "men" then yes it offends me. Now if someone calls me a girl but then calls males boys, then I see nothing wrong. Some people do call women girls to demean them. Others just use it as common use so this doesn't bother me. My family often calls me a girl because to them I'll always be one.
3) Not offended by that at all. I use guys like that often. Much easier than saying "hey you men and women".
jack0177057
03-01-2010, 07:19 PM
^^^ Thanks... I forgot to ask about calling a girl "dude"... I've sometimes gotten the reply, "I am not a dude!" To which, I respond, "Sorry, dudette."
Kellydancer
03-01-2010, 09:03 PM
^^^ Thanks... I forgot to ask about calling a girl "dude"... I've sometimes gotten the reply, "I am not a dude!" To which, I respond, "Sorry, dudette."
I'm not bothered being called a dude or dudette because to me neither one is offensive. I might laugh actually if called either.
chris91
03-01-2010, 09:28 PM
1. - WestCoast explained his use of the term ...
WC's explanation and your examples are all about men calling other men baby. Not the same thing. Anyway, when a woman says "Don't call me baby", you say, "Sorry, I didn't mean it that way."
2. - In a related but unrelated subtext, I personally find it VERY amusing that...
It's ok for us to call dudes baby. Dudes don't generally care about that shit. Women do, so it's not ok for men to call women baby.
lopaw
03-01-2010, 09:28 PM
^^^ Thanks... I forgot to ask about calling a girl "dude"... I've sometimes gotten the reply, "I am not a dude!" To which, I respond, "Sorry, dudette."
The younger the dancer, the more likely that I'll be called "dude" at some point during our conversation in the club. Especially true of 18-20yo's that I've gotten to know fairly well - our conversations are usually peppered with "dudes" (and plenty of other slang not suitable for youngins' !) ;)
Almost Jaded
03-01-2010, 11:57 PM
WC's explanation and your examples are all about men calling other men baby. Not the same thing. Anyway, when a woman says "Don't call me baby", you say, "Sorry, I didn't mean it that way."
But, no. It doesn't matter if it's a guy or a girl; it's all context. In one context, I'm calling you baby, in the other, I'm simply using the term baby. My whole point was that written on a message board, it's hard to tell.
As for the rest - it varies so much from person to person and situation to situation, that frankly a book could be written on the use of those terms. Literally (how's that for a pun, LMAO). I think that it's a bit much for anyone to take offense unless the intent to be pejorative is/was pretty obvious.
Most people find the use of the term "slut" or "whore" to be pretty damn pejorative, wouldn't we agree? Yet MM shrugs it off so easily - frankly answers to it openly - that it's to the point where I have a problem getting upset if a strange guy calls her that in public, LOL. Frankly, I should get bent out of shape and break his nose - but really, I just kinda want to shrug and say "well, she's not mad, and frankly she kind of IS..." So what are you supposed to do? :shrug:
WestCoast101
03-02-2010, 12:38 AM
Almost Jaded is correct.
The term "baby" is often used at the end of a phrase or sentence as a form of dramatic emphasis in regard to the preceding word, and the gender of the audience is completely irrelevant.
"now where did you say you were going'?
"Vegas baby!"
"Wow, what kind of car is that?"
"a Lamborghini baby!"
directed at a male or female, no difference in its plain meaning.
chris91
03-02-2010, 01:33 AM
But, no. It doesn't matter if it's a guy or a girl; it's all context. In one context, I'm calling you baby, in the other, I'm simply using the term baby. My whole point was that written on a message board, it's hard to tell.
That's basically what I was getting at. It is hard to tell the difference on the internet. I thought WC's response to her saying "don't call me baby", was snotty in that it assumed that she was too stupid to know that the word "baby" can be used in different contexts. In reality, shejust misunderstood him. Understandable, given that fact that most of his posts include at least one insult directed at women.
As for the rest - it varies so much from person to person and situation to situation, that frankly a book could be written on the use of those terms. Literally (how's that for a pun, LMAO). I think that it's a bit much for anyone to take offense unless the intent to be pejorative is/was pretty obvious.
Most people find the use of the term "slut" or "whore" to be pretty damn pejorative, wouldn't we agree? Yet MM shrugs it off so easily - frankly answers to it openly - that it's to the point where I have a problem getting upset if a strange guy calls her that in public, LOL. Frankly, I should get bent out of shape and break his nose - but really, I just kinda want to shrug and say "well, she's not mad, and frankly she kind of IS..." So what are you supposed to do? :shrug:
I see what you're saying, but the guy who calls your girl a slut is still a huge dick.
chris91
03-02-2010, 01:37 AM
Almost Jaded is correct.
The term "baby" is often used at the end of a phrase or sentence as a form of dramatic emphasis in regard to the preceding word, and the gender of the audience is completely irrelevant.
"now where did you say you were going'?
"Vegas baby!"
"Wow, what kind of car is that?"
"a Lamborghini baby!"
directed at a male or female, no difference in its plain meaning.
REALLY?! Oh my god, thank you SO much for explaining that! If only Golden Rule were here, you guys could fuck each other and make the world's most condescending baby!
I'm putting you on ignore. Congrats, you're my first.
Almost Jaded
03-02-2010, 02:46 PM
Yeah, thus I am torn in those situations between decking the guy or laughing it off. Only because she owns those terms so flagrantly. Hard to get mad at someone for calling her what she calls herself, even if he DID mean it as an insult.
And don't take so much offense at WC's post, he wasn't meaning to be condescending, he was just trying to reiterate that that's what he meant. He and a couple other guys here suffer from a pretty bad case of foot-in-mouth, and manage to piss you ladies off consistently and most of the time unintentionally. :lol: