View Full Version : Does She Like Me?
mediocrity
02-17-2010, 01:33 PM
^^ Poses the question: why DO guys want to dissect and pare down all of our actions instead of just enjoying it? Enigmas are fun.
lopaw
02-17-2010, 01:45 PM
^^ Poses the question: why DO guys want to dissect and pare down all of our actions instead of just enjoying it? Enigmas are fun.
Damned if I know.
Being an engineer, I'm about as analytical and detail-oriented as you can get, so it's folks like me that you would expect that kind of dissection from. But the more I think about it....maybe it's because of my work that I prefer to leave that kind of thinking "at the office" and enjoy the fantasy and mystery in a SC.
Or am I over thinking the whole thing? ;)
WestCoast101
02-17-2010, 01:54 PM
man you've got it bad, actually contemplating and anxoiusly awaiting your next meeting, that is classic. I bet when you are with her, its like you and her and no one else is in the room, the rest of the world just stops. You don't sound like a high money guy, but if you could, the best strategy is finding another very hot dancer ASAP, and kicking things up with this 2nd dancer, to balance it out and keep control of the situation. Its always a bit risky moving dancers from the commodity category to something unique and special.
yoda57us
02-17-2010, 02:02 PM
...while its true the basic equation is and always will be "PL spends money, dancer takes money, end of story", sometimes its a bit more complicated than that.
Yeah, I said that too in another post. The difference is that guys like you and Everyman live for the complications-that makes you PL's. I like to look at boobies and flirt with hot women. That makes me a customer.
Aside from shaking their tails and doing whatever else we enjoy, its this X factor that makes clubs interesting to many SC connoseurs.
Oh please, it's tits, ass and personality that makes it interesting. The rest of it is all head games. If you fancy yourself a player then I guess it's a thrill but please don't throw around elitist words like connoisseur. And if you must at least spell it right....::)
yoda57us
02-17-2010, 02:03 PM
^^ Poses the question: why DO guys want to dissect and pare down all of our actions instead of just enjoying it? Enigmas are fun.
I used to but then I realized that I had enough angst in my personal life and didn't need to create more of it inside the strip club.
yoda57us
02-17-2010, 02:09 PM
I get yoda's point, if I had just left well enough alone and lived life without dissecting it, I COULD go out there tomorrow with the giddy excitement of a schoolgirl.
Bingo dude, see, you have learned something. I love this site but fortunately for me I was already a reformed PL/RIL by the time I found it. I may come off like a smart ass know-it-all but I come by it honestly. I am a graduate of the strip club college of hard knocks. There are still a few dancers out there that I crashed and burned with years ago and I honestly can't even stand being in the same club with them most of the time-and it's not even their fault!
Everyman
02-17-2010, 02:10 PM
I hate this mentality, and some of the similar posts that followed. Why is every male who accepts his attraction to younger women immediately some kind of pedophile and every younger woman who likes older men has daddy issues? You do realize that it's only the last couple of generations and almost exclusively western society that takes issue with this, right? Whenever a teen girl likes a guy more than 5 years older than her, the whole online invariably explodes with "you have daddy issues and if he likes you back he's sick", when neither is necessarily or in fact the case. And heaven forbid a middle aged man be honest in stating his attraction to these girls - he's a predator! :rolleyes:
I haven't even addressed this part of the responses because I find the idea that I somehow SHOULDN'T like 19 year olds completely silly. I don't apologize for liking 18-25 year olds PHYSICALLY (mentally, I find some of them vacant and hard to talk to, but not others).
Saying I shouldn't is like saying, "you shouldn't like pizza!! You should like salad!!! You're a grown man after all!!" Well yeah, I guess I should like salad, but I like pizza, and I'm not going to apologize for it.
Put another way, Willie Sutton was asked why he robbed banks, and he said "cause that's where the money is." Why do I like 19 year old strippers? Cause that's where the sexiness is.
^^ Poses the question: why DO guys want to dissect and pare down all of our actions instead of just enjoying it? Enigmas are fun.
Because they are men and what's what men do.
FYI to those who wrote, mental update...I normally see her on Thursdays and Fridays, and after last weeks visits and the weekend call/fb activities I was pretty juiced about seeing her again.
Then I did this thread, and all the responses have cooled me a lot. I'll go out there tomorrow, but it won't be with the giddy excitement of a schoolgirl (pun intended).
I get yoda's point, if I had just left well enough alone and lived life without dissecting it, I COULD go out there tomorrow with the giddy excitement of a schoolgirl.
I know how you feel. Last Friday I was out a SC and saw this chick there that put a spell on me (no it wasn't the girl from the "Conversations with strippers ITC" thread I was talking about). There was quite a battle between the logical part of my brain that knew it was all just an in club fantasy and the other part of me that wanted everything to be real. After speaking to a few people about it, including my buddy who I was in the club with I managed to get over it. It feels good to be able to enjoy a a fantasy for what it is.
Everyman
02-17-2010, 02:35 PM
The difference is that guys like you and Everyman live for the complications-that makes you PL's. I like to look at boobies and flirt with hot women. That makes me a customer.
Actually, in the few years I've been doing this, I've almost always been just a T&A consumer and a good, no-strings-attached customer. Remember, I said I've had dances from hundreds of girls, and this is only the 2nd girl where it seems like bells are going off and "fuck, is something more going on here?" (No, the first one was not the first kisser -- different girl).
I don't go looking for this...usually, I'm in and out and happy, but this chick just seems different. I'm thinking it's a socioeconomic thing, she works (her 2nd job), literally at my corner restaurant (no, I haven't gone in there looking for her), grew up in my neighborhood, she could quite literally be the "girl next door". I think that explains a lot of this. As much fun as I might have with a hot-bodied latina from the hood, I'm just never gonna connect with her on that "you're like me" level.
WestCoast101
02-17-2010, 03:01 PM
Yeah, I said that too in another post. The difference is that guys like you and Everyman live for the complications-that makes you PL's. I like to look at boobies and flirt with hot women. That makes me a customer. Oh please, it's tits, ass and personality that makes it interesting. The rest of it is all head games. If you fancy yourself a player then I guess it's a thrill but please don't throw around elitist words like connoisseur. And if you must at least spell it right....::)
There is nothing elitist about the term "connoisseur" in the context I've used it and it simply describes having a passion for something beyond the ordinary, often backed with time, effort, and money in pursuit of that particular passion, and I could name maybe like 5 other interests in life that I might describe in a similar fashion, a couple being considerably more expensive than visiting strip clubs.
Now as for claiming to be a "player" that would not be accurate, as I'm not in clubs looking for sex, or dates, and I even avoid anything even leading to that situation. Yes, in Fresno back in 01 I got sidetracked for a time, but I corrected the situation. In fact it is the no strings attached, self contained , no hassle nature of strip clubs that make them interesting to me. I will comment in here because (as odd at first glance to others as it might sound) there is in fact a considerable amount of intellectual firepower on this site, but strip clubs are certainly not the essence of my real life per se.
yoda57us
02-17-2010, 05:24 PM
...strip clubs are certainly not the essence of my real life per se.
I don't think anyone is saying that they are. Certainly not me. LOL, I just don't happen to agree with you most of the time. That is the beauty about message boards and particularly this one.
lopaw
02-17-2010, 09:17 PM
Because they are men and what's what men do.
LOL
Funny.....I always attributed those types of characteristics to females.
I am a veteran as are several others here. I am convinced there was at least one stripper who truly liked me. I will check my notes.
FBR
lopaw
02-17-2010, 10:13 PM
I am a veteran as are several others here. I am convinced there was at least one stripper who truly liked me. I will check my notes.
FBR
LOL
I have no doubt they genuinely do,FBR, since you seem to be a very likable fellow.
I know for a fact that many strippers like me.
I pay them damn good money to do so!
Michigan
02-17-2010, 10:42 PM
Everyman,
Do you ever wonder if the gas station attendant likes you when you're paying for gas?
Do you ever wonder if the cashier at the super market likes you when she's ringing up your grociers?
They are providing a real life service and the stripper is providing a service of boosting your ego.
They all expect to be paid and like the stripper, the gas station attendant and the cashier will think it very weird if you started hanging out at their place of employment and not spend any money.
If you THINK the stripper likes you, ALL it means she's damn good at her job. If you act on thinking she likes you, that's what the bouncers, the pepper spray and the personal protection orders are for.
Your "friend" sees you as a walking ATM the same way a used car dealer sees someone walking onto his lot. A customer. Nothing more, nothing less.
You have a job? What would you think if one of your clients or your company's customers took a liking to you? Everyday, 10-15 of them wanting to "rescue" from your job that, if done with just a LITTLE financial responsibility could set you up for life? And what if they were not even your type in the least? Phillis Diller types who think they have power over you because they think their money makes you their wage slave and therefore they feel entitled to more than just the time they pay for you to do your job?
Strippers care about:
Taking money out of your wallet.
Making you a regular until your money runs out or you cross their line.
Making you a whale until your money runs out or you cross their line.
Making you a sugar daddy until your money runs out or you cross their line.
Yes, their are strippers who will do extras, go out with you, have sex in a hotel or in the parking lot across the street from the club as strippers have different lines to be crossed.
She'll give you attention because you're paying for it.
She'll be nice to you because, like most people, she wants an enjoyable work place.
She will never give you her heart because that is already allocated to either her lesbian lover, boyfriend, husband or baby or babies.
Don't get mad at her. You came there wanting to be liked, understood and ego boosted. She did those things for a fee. She's already stated very plainly that she wants to fuck the bouncer. When a woman is interested in a guy, if a guy says (to her face) that he wants to fuck the waitress, any self-respecting woman would lose interest in the guy and dump him.
It sounds like you're going through a mid-life crisis. Try watching the Dudley Moore movie 10. You'll probably see yourself plain and clear. If you're honest.
Strippers are like pro athletes. You can admire them but most of the people/fans who try to get serious with them are big time PLs.
Everyone keeps telling you these things in so many words. But you KEEP responding because you're holding out for that one person who is going to tell you want you want to hear:
SHE LOVES YOU AND ONLY YOU.
That's true. Only IF, by YOU, we mean your wallet.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 12:01 AM
Great post.
The OP has never precisely described how hot this dancer is, or how much money he is paying her, both of which would help in understanding what is going on.
Someone ITC may have explained to the dancer how to handle potential RILs, and that may explain the kissing part, such kissing considered by the OP as he states as having some significance.
Note that the (mistaken I believe) consensus view point on this site among dancers is that ITC (makeout style) kissing is very very rare in clubs, and when it happens the girl is either a slut, desperate, or both OR with the few that have admitted to kissing ITC, its only with guys they would otherwise date in the real world, or at least have some attraction toward. Its possible the OP buys that analysis.
True, having a dancer say she wants to fuck the bouncer is a definite red flag for RIL types.
Hopper
02-18-2010, 12:21 AM
I think the real question is... why are YOU a 40 + something man, even remotely think that it is acceptable to have a relationship beyond a friendship with a 19 year old girl.
Why is it unacceptable?
mediocrity
02-18-2010, 12:27 AM
WTF is "RIL"?
Hopper
02-18-2010, 12:35 AM
OK, and I'm asking why does there have to be an explanation? Strip clubs are really very simple places. Beautiful women take their clothes off and we as customers pay to watch them do that. The more we pay the longer we get to watch. Anything, and I do mean anything beyond that just complicates things.
More complicated than a SC still isn't very complicated - or bad.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 12:40 AM
regular in love
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 01:04 AM
Classic RIL situation with a minor variation, he is conscious of what is occuring and a heavily experienced strip club customer, and that is exactly why he is posting the question. He did say she was like some (high school) Pom Pom girl, but i was hoping something more extreme like she is like hotter than all get out, like the hottest girl on the USC cheerleader squad, the 3rd girl from the left, something lke that, then I could point out that unless he's a regular (50 something California billionaire) Ron Burkle type who has a reputation for flying incredibly hot 19 yr old hotties around the country on his personal 757 (complete with bedroom) so he can can fuck them before he goes to his feminists fundraisers and other libbie causes,, then the OP might just as well forget it..
Then again maybe she gets horny, and she will fuck anything within reach. However I planned to leave that part out.
Hopper
02-18-2010, 01:11 AM
you've really nailed it, plus no one gives a crap when guys like 50 plus something yr old shopping store magnate Ron Burkle, the billionaire from CAL and owner of the Pittsburgh Penguins is flying around on his personal Boeing 757 with his ( what 19 yr old?) girlfriend, and having fundraisers for all the libs and feminist groups out here, and hanging with Clintons all the time, "well, yes, he's entitled to it"
Right on AJ and WC. Billy Joel (55) married a girl over 32 years his junior (23) in 2004 and Bill Wyman was dating a 13-yo model in the early 1980s. It's like people think men should be castrated after 40. Yet every stripper here obviously thinks it's okay for a girl "young enough to be his daughter" to dance naked for a guy over 40. It's so hypocritical coming from them.
chris91
02-18-2010, 01:15 AM
I haven't even addressed this part of the responses because I find the idea that I somehow SHOULDN'T like 19 year olds completely silly. I don't apologize for liking 18-25 year olds PHYSICALLY (mentally, I find some of them vacant and hard to talk to, but not others).
Saying I shouldn't is like saying, "you shouldn't like pizza!! You should like salad!!! You're a grown man after all!!" Well yeah, I guess I should like salad, but I like pizza, and I'm not going to apologize for it.
Put another way, Willie Sutton was asked why he robbed banks, and he said "cause that's where the money is." Why do I like 19 year old strippers? Cause that's where the sexiness is.
Being attracted to a 19 year old is different from acting on that attraction. 19 year old girls are children. Their brains aren't even finished developing. It's not like you're 50 and she's 30. She's a child, and you are an adult. You are making out with a child. Rationalize it all you want, but it will still be what it is.
What makes it worse is that this particular girl is clearly a little slow, or she would have figured out on her own that it's not ok to make out with customers. I think there is another thread somewhere where we discussed this subject to death.
chris91
02-18-2010, 01:17 AM
Yet every stripper here obviously thinks it's okay for a girl "young enough to be his daughter" to dance naked for a guy over 40.
I don't think it's ok, but I don't blame the girl, because she's a kid and doesn't know any better.
Hopper
02-18-2010, 01:31 AM
Hasn't it been about a month?
Ok I'm not really asking the question. I'm a veteran both here and in the clubs and can analyze a situation as well as anyone else. *See my answer below.* But I would be interested in any reaction anyone has to the following scenario.
19 y/o new dancer (20+ years younger than me), I met her 2 weeks after she started, quickly became my fave and been seeing her 2x/week for about a month. First dance she did for me, she said "I'm new, tell me what to do", I did and she followed it step by step. Later she said she did it for another guy and he paid her double price. She was excited about that.
Our "dances" have gradually evolved into make-out sessions, that's what do mostly. The other day she gave me her number, said call her at midnight after she got off work. I did, but she was pretty stoned and the conversation was not very coherent and lasted only a few minutes.
Couple of days later she adds me to facebook (her personal site -- we know each other's real data), sends me a msg saying "sorry about the other night, call me anytime!"
Money facts: I don't give her extra PL money; even if I tip her extra for dances she says "you gave me 85 instead of 75...did you mean to?" Never lets me buy her a drink, says they're too expensive, she'll buy her own. Other day she had made a few hundred, turned a guy down for a dance, came and sat with me, told me about it and said "but you don't have to buy a dance to make up for it."
Has told me about her boyfriend, says she wants to break up with him, but also tells me all about and points out the bouncer she wants to fuck.
*My answer*: she does like me, in a personal sense, sees me as both a good potential regular and someone she can be friends with IRL -- and the making out, phone calls, personal contact, are intended to maintain both. But, extremely unlikely she actually likes me "romantically," you generally don't tell someone like that about others you want to fuck, plus our age/life difference is just too great for me to think there is anything romantic going on here.
Any better analysis?
Get to know her better and you'll find out. Talk to her on Facebook.
Hopper
02-18-2010, 01:34 AM
I don't think it's ok, but I don't blame the girl, because she's a kid and doesn't know any better.
Not okay for 18-yo strippers to have 40-yo customers?
Hopper
02-18-2010, 01:37 AM
Being attracted to a 19 year old is different from acting on that attraction. 19 year old girls are children. Their brains aren't even finished developing. It's not like you're 50 and she's 30. She's a child, and you are an adult. You are making out with a child. Rationalize it all you want, but it will still be what it is.
...
A 19-yo girl is denfinitely not a child. People marry younger than that.
chris91
02-18-2010, 01:48 AM
Not okay for 18-yo strippers to have 40-yo customers?
I don't think it's ok for 18 year old girls to have customers of any age. They should not be stripping.
A 19-yo girl is denfinitely not a child. People get married younger than that.
You don't get to decide when a person becomes an adult, and neither do the lawmakers. Mother nature makes that decision. Human brains do not finish developing until the early twenties. Teenagers are not capable of making rational decisions. It's science, brah.
Just because I'm curious, how young is too young for you? 13? 8?
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 01:50 AM
Being attracted to a 19 year old is different from acting on that attraction. 19 year old girls are children. Their brains aren't even finished developing. It's not like you're 50 and she's 30. She's a child, and you are an adult. You are making out with a child. Rationalize it all you want, but it will still be what it is.
What makes it worse is that this particular girl is clearly a little slow, or she would have figured out on her own that it's not ok to make out with customers. I think there is another thread somewhere where we discussed this subject to death.
She is 18 or over, not a minor and as for being slow? well maybe certain dancers in here have been a bit "slow" about finally figuring out that make out style kissing is going on all the place in clubs, and kissing for some girls just isn't a big deal. Of course 19 year olds are too young in my opinion for such things, because its true 19 yr olds are very different than 22 year olds, but I wouldn't assume she is slow. Girls of her generation often start having sex in middle school, which is sad, but it was the end stage (one can hope) of the 30 yr sex revolution starting circa 1965. and its apparently hit a wall because you just cannot go any lower, unless the pervs take total control of modern culture..
chris91
02-18-2010, 02:07 AM
She is 18 or over, not a minor and as for being slow? well maybe certain dancers in here have been a bit "slow" about finally figuring out that make out style kissing is going on all the place in clubs, and kissing for some girls just isn't a big deal. Of course 19 year olds are too young in my opinion for such things, because its true 19 yr olds are very different than 22 year olds, but I wouldn't assume she is slow. Girls of her generation often start having sex in middle school, which is sad, but it was the end stage (one can hope) of the 30 yr sex revolution starting circa 1965. and its apparently hit a wall because you just cannot go any lower, unless the pervs take total control of modern culture..
1. Being a minor is a matter of law, not biology. The law is flawed in that it defines some children as adults and provides justification for pedophiles to act on their urges.
2. I will not discuss kissing in clubs with you anymore. It's like talking to a very stupid brick wall.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 02:26 AM
Ok, no need to debate it further, but admit you were wrong, and I will drop by your club, and kiss you, and not charge you a nickel..
Hopper
02-18-2010, 02:26 AM
I don't think it's ok for 18 year old girls to have customers of any age. They should not be stripping.
You don't get to decide when a person becomes an adult, and neither do the lawmakers. Mother nature makes that decision. Human brains do not finish developing until the early twenties. Teenagers are not capable of making rational decisions. It's science, brah.
Your argument doesn't sound very scientific to me. Just because her brain hasn't stopped devoping doesn't mean she can't use it at all. By age 19, it must be a long way to being fully developed. The worst years are duiring puberty. Are you saying that one is not an adult until age 25?
Just because I'm curious, how young is too young for you? 13? 8?
We are talking about a 19-yo, way above 8 and 13 yrs. I can't generalise about how young is "too young". I can say I am generally only attracted to girls 18 and over.
We have had this topic before and it was a total wreck. Ironically it was begun by a stripper declaring her belief that the older men get the more they like to screw underage girls. Then customers who responded and discussed it were accused of pedophilia by a number of other strippers.
mediocrity
02-18-2010, 02:39 AM
Ok, no need to debate it further, but admit you were wrong, and I will drop by your club, and kiss you, and not charge you a nickel..
Shame this isn't real life because that is something that a woman should slap the shit out of a man for saying.
You should be ashamed. Pig.
chris91
02-18-2010, 03:37 AM
Your argument doesn't sound very scientific to me. Just because her brain hasn't stopped devoping doesn't mean she can't use it at all. By age 19, it must be a long way to being fully developed. The worst years are duiring puberty. Are you saying that one is not an adult until age 25?
If I remember correctly, then it isn't until between 21 and 23 that the human brain has finished making all the connections necessary for a person to make rational decisions. That would be when one becomes an adult.
The idea that anyone thinks it's ok for a 40 year old man to mess around with a 19 year old girl is just heart breaking. There's a reason why we don't call them 19 year old women.
Anyway, I don't expect to change anyone's mind here. It's like arguing about religion. Logic is no match for faith.
mediocrity
02-18-2010, 03:39 AM
If I remember correctly, then it isn't until between 21 and 23 that the human brain has finished making all the connections necessary for a person to make rational decisions. That would be when one becomes an adult.
The idea that anyone thinks it's ok for a 40 year old man to mess around with a 19 year old girl is just heart breaking. There's a reason why we don't call them 19 year old women.
Anyway, I don't expect to change anyone's mind here. It's like arguing about religion. Logic is no match for faith.
23 and 25, but I am so on Team Chris for this one.
Hopper
02-18-2010, 04:01 AM
If I remember correctly, then it isn't until between 21 and 23 that the human brain has finished making all the connections necessary for a person to make rational decisions. That would be when one becomes an adult.
I still don't think that's a sound conclusion. Many people aren't rational their whole lives, not just until their connections are finished. I know plenty of rational people under 19. I've met rational 8-yo's. A lot of things come into it other than biology.
The idea that anyone thinks it's ok for a 40 year old man to mess around with a 19 year old girl is just heart breaking. There's a reason why we don't call them 19 year old women.
Anyway, I don't expect to change anyone's mind here. It's like arguing about religion. Logic is no match for faith.
I didn't say it's okay for 40 yo men to mess around with 19 yo girls as a matter of routine. It probably isn't okay. All I object to is someone saying it is "unacceptable", like there is an absolute rule against it for all instances. That's a stupid rule to make. A twenty year age gap is not an unbreachable barrier to sexual relations and I don't agree that 19 yo's are children.
Everyman
02-18-2010, 06:20 AM
I'll try to respond to various things, forgive me if I forget something.
19 isn't a "child". Maybe she's not completely an adult, but she's far from a "child". All the personal examples from my own life show otherwise. I was living on my own at 17. My mom got married at 18. My sister got married at 18. Hell, my aunt got married at 15. As long as the law (based on what society says an "adult" is) has the age of consent at 18, that's good enough for me. I'm not a neuropsychologist, and no one on this board is either. If you are, speak up.
I'm not a RIL. I was, once, years ago, and it will only happen once. I learned my lesson. I'm a regular seeking explanation for different behavior than I've gotten from any other stripper I've seen. Behavior like, we're in a secluded corner of the club, she orders a coffee drink with a ton of whipped cream, she puts a little cream on her nipple and has me lick it off. Say "ewww" all you want, that'll bring a guy back spending more. (Speaking of spending, about $100 a trip, all stage money plus a couple of dances, no "extra" money for time or extras.)
But, the girl does not have the mental match-up for me to fall in love with, and yes, the age gap is a large part of that. It would be the rare mature 19-year-old, indeed, for me to fall in love with. I haven't met one yet, in fact.
How hot is she? Always eye of the beholder. She's a 10 in body if you like a tall, slim, perfect skin B-cup type with a perfectly formed, still-tight pussy. (Sorry, just being blunt). About an 8 in face, not particularly beautiful, but still attractive. Not the hottest dancer I've ever seen, but certainly in the top 10.
However, the largest attraction is her background, that she could literally be the "girl next door" in my neighborhood. I'm surprised no one has picked up on this, as I think about it, it is more and more the largest factor creating my attraction.
Fucking the bouncer...yeah huge red flag. She has the game to do all these things with me, but not enough game yet to know what NOT to do. Speaking of the bouncer, he must be some kind of super-stud. I was sitting with my girl and another stripper, the HOTTEST girl in the club, this other girl said she'd fucked him even before she started working there. Also talked about his huge dick. Talk about TMI, but I guess that goes along with being a club regular.
pussyinboots
02-18-2010, 07:13 AM
Shes young and stupid, you don't need to be "ghetto" or drug addicted to suffer from that. You on the other hand are old and stupid and that's far less forgivable.
Well - she may be stupid - but not THAT stupid. She's bright enough to know that if she pays a 40 year old club regular enough attention - he'll spend his money on her - not the others.
So - yes - she likes you. For your money.
And only for as long as it lasts.
princessjas
02-18-2010, 08:13 AM
Actually, in the few years I've been doing this, I've almost always been just a T&A consumer and a good, no-strings-attached customer. Remember, I said I've had dances from hundreds of girls, and this is only the 2nd girl where it seems like bells are going off and "fuck, is something more going on here?" (No, the first one was not the first kisser -- different girl).
I don't go looking for this...usually, I'm in and out and happy, but this chick just seems different. I'm thinking it's a socioeconomic thing, she works (her 2nd job), literally at my corner restaurant (no, I haven't gone in there looking for her), grew up in my neighborhood, she could quite literally be the "girl next door". I think that explains a lot of this. As much fun as I might have with a hot-bodied latina from the hood, I'm just never gonna connect with her on that "you're like me" level.
Don't creep her out by focusing on this. I always did the upscale stripper thing (my bread and butter was rich businessmen in their 40's-60's), and since I'm educated and worked as first a researcher then an accountant while dancing...well I got more of the obsessive stalker types. It doesn't matter that she's not a hood-rat. Many of us aren't. You'll still scare the crap outta her if you get obsessive. Sadly, the rougher girls seem to deal with that kinda thing better, although from what I've seen they get it much less.
Everyman
02-18-2010, 09:48 AM
Don't creep her out by focusing on this. I always did the upscale stripper thing (my bread and butter was rich businessmen in their 40's-60's), and since I'm educated and worked as first a researcher then an accountant while dancing...well I got more of the obsessive stalker types. It doesn't matter that she's not a hood-rat. Many of us aren't. You'll still scare the crap outta her if you get obsessive. Sadly, the rougher girls seem to deal with that kinda thing better, although from what I've seen they get it much less.
So you're saying don't be a creepy, obsessive stalker. Hm, I'll have to think about that one, it was the direction I was planning to go.
But if you're saying it won't work......
Likethis
02-18-2010, 10:25 AM
19 isn't a "child". Maybe she's not completely an adult, but she's far from a "child". All the personal examples from my own life show otherwise. I was living on my own at 17. My mom got married at 18. My sister got married at 18. Hell, my aunt got married at 15. As long as the law (based on what society says an "adult" is) has the age of consent at 18, that's good enough for me. I'm not a neuropsychologist, and no one on this board is either. If you are, speak up.
To get married is not a rational decision.
And you don't know what it takes to dance at a SC so don't pretend it's like getting married or living on your own.
I'm a regular seeking explanation for different behavior than I've gotten from any other stripper I've seen. Behavior like, we're in a secluded corner of the club, she orders a coffee drink with a ton of whipped cream, she puts a little cream on her nipple and has me lick it off. Say "ewww" all you want, that'll bring a guy back spending more.
What's so nonstripper about that?
Seems like a typical piece of extra attention to keep you hooked.
I was sitting with my girl and another stripper
She's not your girl. You're getting very sentimentally attached to her for no good reason.
But, the girl does not have the mental match-up for me to fall in love with, and yes, the age gap is a large part of that. It would be the rare mature 19-year-old, indeed, for me to fall in love with. I haven't met one yet, in fact.
To me it looks like she's outsmarting you. Even though her brain is not fully developed yet.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 10:27 AM
Shame this isn't real life because that is something that a woman should slap the shit out of a man for saying.
You should be ashamed. Pig.
Because of my profound shame, I've actually reported myself to Gloria Steinem to beg her forgiveness.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 10:31 AM
man you are in denial, this has RIL written all over it. Watch out you could be RIJ if it turns out she is really 15.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 10:40 AM
but otherwise an interesting thread and an interesting set of facts, but it has a number of classic piss-off- SW dancer issues including 1. kissing 2. a borderline underage dancer 3. an RIL factor at some level, which to most dancers (except those explicitly working the guy for big dollars)- is a "creepy thing"
you've violated many unwritten rules, and probably should also be reported to Gloria Steinem.
Likethis
02-18-2010, 10:46 AM
bla... RIL... bla bla... RIJ... bla
I'm not familiar with this, what does it mean? (RIL and RIJ)
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 10:48 AM
Mediocrity, but you however have been reported to Sean Connery, who once threatened to give MoneyPenny "the goooodd slap she deserves" but has since became a crusader against such violence.
WestCoast101
02-18-2010, 10:49 AM
"regular in love"
"regular in jail"
Likethis
02-18-2010, 10:51 AM
Oh that was just too obvious.
chris91
02-18-2010, 01:51 PM
I still don't think that's a sound conclusion. Many people aren't rational their whole lives, not just until their connections are finished. I know plenty of rational people under 19. I've met rational 8-yo's. A lot of things come into it other than biology.
What comes into it other than biology? If a person's brain is incapable of making rational decisions, then how will that person make rational decisions?
I didn't say it's okay for 40 yo men to mess around with 19 yo girls as a matter of routine. It probably isn't okay. All I object to is someone saying it is "unacceptable", like there is an absolute rule against it for all instances. That's a stupid rule to make. A twenty year age gap is not an unbreachable barrier to sexual relations and...
Sure, I can't say that nowhere in the history of time and space has it ever been ok for a 40 year old to mess around with a 19 year old. If the 40 year old were developmentally challenged and the 19 year old had a bionic brain, then maybe it would be okay. There are always exceptions to the rule; however, the rule is: 40 year olds should not mess around with 19 year olds.
I don't agree that 19 yo's are children.
It's not a matter of opinion. You cannot agree or disagree with facts.