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PleasureVictim
09-14-2014, 03:50 PM
I'm in love with a guy I was dating. He broke off our plans to get into a relationship for unclear reasons. I keep blocking his number, but my stupid iphone still let's his call come through every few months or so. When I see his 'name' (sad face emoji) I can't help not to answer, and our conversations begin again.

He tells me he can't predict the future (implying we might have a shot later on, but I know he's full of shit). I really love talking to him, he's really the only person I speak to anymore. (My female friends, we usually just text) I've put our getting back together out of my mind.

But today he's shopping for furniture, sending me pictures of things to see if I like it, and I can't help thinking that it could have been us moving in together. Now I'm depressed, and instead of finishing my homework, I'm going to take a nap to keep from crying.

This is all my fault because of my lack of willpower to just ignore him. I'm still crazy in love with him.

Aurora_Sunset
09-14-2014, 05:29 PM
Aurora what's up with that? It seems like every weird, kinky "open relationship" couple I've ever met, or seen on TV, or seen come into the SC are almost always fugly! Sorry if that's mean but no....I do not want to be in your love triangle. Y'all are not cute.

Haha! I once had a friend in the kink community say, "Most of the time, the kink community looks like the Island of Misfit Toys." I laughed my ass off, cuz it sounds so mean, but it's usually so true. I'm sure not ALL of them. But... jeezus, why??

Aurora_Sunset
09-14-2014, 05:31 PM
I'm in love with a guy I was dating. He broke off our plans to get into a relationship for unclear reasons. I keep blocking his number, but my stupid iphone still let's his call come through every few months or so. When I see his 'name' (sad face emoji) I can't help not to answer, and our conversations begin again.

He tells me he can't predict the future (implying we might have a shot later on, but I know he's full of shit). I really love talking to him, he's really the only person I speak to anymore. (My female friends, we usually just text) I've put our getting back together out of my mind.

But today he's shopping for furniture, sending me pictures of things to see if I like it, and I can't help thinking that it could have been us moving in together. Now I'm depressed, and instead of finishing my homework, I'm going to take a nap to keep from crying.

This is all my fault because of my lack of willpower to just ignore him. I'm still crazy in love with him.

:( I'm so sorry. People suck.

Adrienne26
09-14-2014, 07:03 PM
I'm madly in love with my guy here but I'm getting tired of his other "life" meaning his crazy ass ex wife and his daughter whom I've never met. I knew all this going in but here we are 4 years later and I'm just fed up. Maybe I'm just having a bad day because I really do enjoy my space but sometimes I fantasize about marrying a guy that would be here all the time and be a stepdad to my son... but I know I'd get tired of that too. I'm mother and father to my son and have been since he was born. My confession is that I'm frustrated as hell and don't know what I want. It's time for another glass of pinot grigio and my favorite vibrator.

simone87
09-14-2014, 11:01 PM
Confession: Well, kinda a confession since I don't want to leave the topic of racial profiling in clubs, but definitely a confession since I kept this precious hustle secret every time I read a relevant thread because it involved rare magic at my last club.

While all my coworkers antagonized or ignored Indian guys at this club, I had a cult following. Indian customers play cheap and get grabby like everyone says at first, but when I learned to make them respect me as a human, they became my favorite customers hands down. When they would act up during floor dances, I would bop them on the nose like a bad dog, tell them to treat me how their mothers would want them to treat a lady, and ask for a "real" date outside the club noise alone in VIP so we could get to know each other. It worked almost every time if the guy had money.

VIPs mostly consisted of them telling me how they would treat me like a queen after our marriage. Elaborate meal plans since I always say how much I love Indian food, my first trip to India to meet family and see their world, the best aspects of their culture, all while cuddling with clothes on.

They're the sweetest customers when you know to switch to being a real, strong, intelligent woman they can respect and become infatuated with. Not a stripper who's just bad at her job (AKA, not allowing contact and demanding payment anyway-- we're whores in India FYI).

I cherished those customers. My favorite ever was a young software engineer who worked for Google and had recently gotten an amazing promotion. He dropped over 5 grand just to snuggle and chat and indulge my drink requests all night. We used Hindi pet names. It would have been the best date ever if I were actually attracted to him. But both of us knew we were just roleplaying.

I hope someone benefits from this angle and profits after getting VIPs with Indian (or perhaps Middle Eastern) customers.

PS -- they like to grab your belly and are more likely to want to lick your armpits than white cohorts.

so, indian guys have always loved me, and i took your advice today and got a champagne room and POSSIBLE sugar daddy!! good advice, i love SW :)

wednesday86
09-15-2014, 09:23 AM
I've been trying to not drink too much at work, but I ALWAYS make so much more $ when I do. Why is that? I'm pretty good at monitoring myself but I always have this fear in the back of my mind that I'll end up an alcoholic like my mother.

SimoneGray
09-15-2014, 12:29 PM
Confession: I was having some light hearted banter with one of my cam customers who I do GFE with, he's been with me for about 6 months now so we know each other really well and I made a comment about him coming back to see my tits etc when he stopped short. I thought I'd upset him so I apologized and he said "no need, its just I don't really come to you for that. I come because your personality has seduced me completely. You're witty, charming, funny and just the best in every situation".

I logged off and cried. I have to confess that that is the first time in three years that someone has liked me for my personality. My on again, off again person makes it very clear that I'm a shitty human being, "but at least he gets to fuck me which makes it interesting". I get so sad because my real life situation has broken me down so much adn the concept of someone actually liking me for more than the tits or pussy I can give has become foreign. Also WTF at myself for letting a cam customer get me so emotional. Problem is, I know he means what he says. Urgh, I wish I had the same level of care and compassion floating around in my real life as I do in my cam one. Damn.

michele11
09-15-2014, 04:36 PM
My Ocd is out of control and obsessions are rampant. I'm so mad, I realized I bought my cat from the wrong breeder! I really wanted another shaded silver but there are no breeders here and I'm not spending 1500 on a kitten unseen. Well before I went out of town I talked to a lady who only had flame points. If I'm going himmy i don't like flames( only blue or blue lynx or tortie point. She said she had blues that were only 5 weeks and I could come when they develop at 9-10 weeks( persians develop slower than other brreds. Any way I get back and I"m home a few weeks so I thougt I was calling the same lady, their both on the same city an hour away. Well I ended up buying a tortie seal point( not my favorite color). I love her and she was so sweet but since I went away She is not as affectionate. I also was like WTF this cat is double the price? Any way I see an add for a blue today( it's the right lady!) My moms like, why can't you just be happy with shauntal? Are you going to take her back. NO but I do want to look at this one( I was really looking forward) and she has great lineage. Oh funny note both moms are from the same breeder so they are related. Oh and I got my registration today her registered name will be " Shauntal of king Cole and Purking Miss Mandy Mack! LOl.

fishielicious
09-16-2014, 08:27 PM
Haha, Genoveve, I'm the same way. I love dogs (especially big ones) and do not at all mind them barking. It's nice that it's something that can piss off your annoying neighbor and at the same time you're totally innocent and unaffected in the whole thing. Makes me wish there'd been a dog around to harass my former super-annoying, prying, and asshole-ish neighbor.

My confession today is that I just turned in a few paragraphs to my memoir class about my stripping career. I'm in a fiction writing MFA program, and this is the first time I'm taking a nonfiction class where we're required to write autobiographical essays. I just had to turn in 250 words of the beginning of my essay to the whole class, so now I'm pretty much outed to my whole program as a stripper, and I'm really nervous about how everyone is going to react to it. But I knew it was the story I wanted to tell and the essay I wanted to write, and I told myself, what's the point of being in this class if I'm not going to be honest and write what I want to? So... hopefully I won't get laughed out of the program (or fired from my TA job).

wednesday86
09-17-2014, 06:41 AM
My husband and I went out for drinks with friends last night and, I just sat there listening to these other women go on about their 'big girl' jobs in the city and how hard they work. My confession is that I felt really sorry for them. They make so little compared to me (and think it's 'a lot') for so much work! One of them has put off having a family because she works 6-7 days a week as an assistant/nanny for a millionaire. She wanted to know all about our baby and our marriage because she wants that so much but doesn't have time. I felt so bad for her...I did not reveal my job because I had just met them and I only let close friends know that I'm a stripper...but I think that was the first time I've ever felt TRULY thankful that I found stripping. Seriously, fuck that vanilla job shit.

michele11
09-17-2014, 08:51 AM
I'm mad I'm so depressed. Confession, I haven't taken a proper shower in 2 weeks. Yes , that's what depression will do and I'm pissed I'm missing out on the last home games at my summer club because I didn't get ready or book my trip and I can't leave tomorrow. I need at least 7 days to prerpare so I can get my extensions, color my hair and get everything together. Sucks because I've been making about 3000 more each 8 shifts than last year and it's the end of the games so this month would have been great too! Ugh! Depression! It's either that or anxiety!

Aniela
09-17-2014, 01:17 PM
I am so angry w/ my mother.

She blew up at my dad last nite bc she feels he is blowing off her health concerns following a recent surgery. I understand she is anxious, but what got to me was when she told him 'It's not your health on the line here!' Two yrs ago she blew off my little boy's health 'It's not that bad' & telling me I was over-reacting. He died from the problem that I was 'over-reacting' abt.

All my dad was trying to say last nite was basically 'We can't know until we go for the follow-up, so just try to not let your imagination get away from you.' he was not blowing her off at all, but her anxiety the last month+ has her kind of irrational at times. She's not wanting to hear anything from us lately that might contradict her 'OMGOMGOMG WHAT IF IT'S [whatever the hell she thinks it might be since the damn thing has been removed]' She called him a few not-nice names, said Fk You & told him not to bother coming to the follow-up.

Of course, now when it's HER health, it is w/o question the end of the fkng world. HER tumour is all that's important, & all the ??s surrounding it, but I was over-reacting, & looking for trouble, & causing every1 else so much stress when my baby got sick.

I love my mother dearly & I am not at all happy that she is having these health problems, but fk her right now. Just fk her.

whirlerz
09-17-2014, 06:57 PM
Maybe sound silly, but. I am sooo excited to get my Amazon book, "The Price, the Rise/Fall of Natalia, NY's highest paid escort".
Ordered it yesterday, no tracking info yet, but I should get it soon, it's shipping frm not too far.

fishielicious
09-17-2014, 07:30 PM
^^Ohhh that sounds like a good book, I will have to check it out. I love books and articles about stripping and other sex work. So far I have read and loved Strip City by Lily Burana, Brothel: Mustang Ranch and Its Women by Alexa Albert, and this article by Susan Elizabeth Shepard: http://www.buzzfeed.com/susanelizabethshepard/wildcatting-a-strippers-guide-to-the-modern-american-boomtow#3m9z16x. I actually read Shepard's article while I was still looking for work and wishing I could just travel instead, and it inspired my current dream of doing a strip trip to Alaska next summer. So, I'm always looking for new reading recs!

tuesdaymarie
09-18-2014, 07:37 PM
I'm feeling depressed, hate my salaried 9-5 job, and just want to say fuck it, quit, move into the cheapest apartment I can find and finish a manuscript while working one night a week at a club and chugging bourbon on someone else's dime.




I am probably being childish and ungrateful, but fuck me double for even acknowledging that.


Also, I want to drastically change my appearance again with self-tanner, lip injections, and hair dye. And maybe a new tattoo.


K, done.

wednesday86
09-19-2014, 04:03 PM
^Girl, I don't think I can ever work a 9-5 AGAIN after stripping. It sounds like torture.

I also feel pressured to change my appearance. Last night I just didn't feel "strippery" enough. There's all these girls with fake boobs, fake lashes, fake nails and fake tans. They all look very stripper-esque...and here I am: pale, flat chested, red headed, normal lashes and nails. I feel like a plain Jane. Don't know if I should alter my appearance to look more the part, or stay with my current look to stand out? I feel like a plan "girl next door" competing with girls who looks like porn stars. :(

whirlerz
09-19-2014, 05:07 PM
yea. BUUUT, you stand out. I'm sure you're great! :)^

chanzep
09-19-2014, 08:45 PM
Sat in bed wondering if work was good!, when I should be glad for a weekend off, even if I am ill. Also dreaming about life ing alone.

simone87
09-19-2014, 08:49 PM
^Girl, I don't think I can ever work a 9-5 AGAIN after stripping. It sounds like torture.

I also feel pressured to change my appearance. Last night I just didn't feel "strippery" enough. There's all these girls with fake boobs, fake lashes, fake nails and fake tans. They all look very stripper-esque...and here I am: pale, flat chested, red headed, normal lashes and nails. I feel like a plain Jane. Don't know if I should alter my appearance to look more the part, or stay with my current look to stand out? I feel like a plan "girl next door" competing with girls who looks like porn stars. :(

if they all look like classic barbies, i think you should stay the way you are!! stand out, be different, its always better to stand apart from the competition. and not all guys like the tanned, acrylic nail/hair extension wearing, blond, fake boobied girls either! a lot of them absolutely love the cute fresh approachable girl next door. i've had great nights wearing nothing but tinted moisturizer, mascara, and a tank top.

lovelydancer
09-20-2014, 01:34 AM
I've always struggled with my depression since I was a teen. I go through periods where I feel great, and other times when I am in a dark place. As of lately, it's hit an all-time low. It feels like I'm drowning in my own head, and just being able to get through each day is a challenge. Like everyday is a fog, and while my body is moving my mind feels like it's at a standstill. All of my typical symptoms feel as though they've been amplified by 1000x. It sucks feeling like I'm in a losing battle with myself.

ava$
09-20-2014, 05:23 AM
^Girl, I don't think I can ever work a 9-5 AGAIN after stripping. It sounds like torture.

I also feel pressured to change my appearance. Last night I just didn't feel "strippery" enough. There's all these girls with fake boobs, fake lashes, fake nails and fake tans. They all look very stripper-esque...and here I am: pale, flat chested, red headed, normal lashes and nails. I feel like a plain Jane. Don't know if I should alter my appearance to look more the part, or stay with my current look to stand out? I feel like a plan "girl next door" competing with girls who looks like porn stars. :(
If you make good money I say stay the same if not, you may want to change some things about how you look if you will be happy with it, Just my 2 cents!

ava$
09-20-2014, 05:24 AM
^Girl, I don't think I can ever work a 9-5 AGAIN after stripping. It sounds like torture.

I also feel pressured to change my appearance. Last night I just didn't feel "strippery" enough. There's all these girls with fake boobs, fake lashes, fake nails and fake tans. They all look very stripper-esque...and here I am: pale, flat chested, red headed, normal lashes and nails. I feel like a plain Jane. Don't know if I should alter my appearance to look more the part, or stay with my current look to stand out? I feel like a plan "girl next door" competing with girls who looks like porn stars. :(
If you make good money I say stay the same if not, you may want to change some things about how you look if you will be happy with it, Just my 2 cents!

wednesday86
09-20-2014, 06:42 AM
Thanks ladies. <3 I was thinking about it last night..and I think I'm going to get a new hair cut and get my nails did. I make decent money but I think the stripper-y girls are making more. I only have a couple of friends there. One girl makes way more than I do but she's not the Barbie type at all. She's Italian but looks Arabic and plays that up. I think I do want to get my boobs done eventually...not just for work but since I had the baby they're flatter or something. They don't have the same bounce that they used to! lol! Maybe from breastfeeding? When I first had the baby and they were full of milk, I had to wear a D bra and they looked amazing! I just want to get them blown back up haha

michele11
09-20-2014, 06:48 AM
I've always struggled with my depression since I was a teen. I go through periods where I feel great, and other times when I am in a dark place. As of lately, it's hit an all-time low. It feels like I'm drowning in my own head, and just being able to get through each day is a challenge. Like everyday is a fog, and while my body is moving my mind feels like it's at a standstill. All of my typical symptoms feel as though they've been amplified by 1000x. It sucks feeling like I'm in a losing battle with myself.
I've been feeling like this as well and it's only getting worse. Even anti deppesants aren't helping. Here's to us feeling better soon!:)

whirlerz
09-20-2014, 07:07 AM
I've been feeling like this as well and it's only getting worse. Even anti deppesants aren't helping. Here's to us feeling better soon!:)

Yea, I'm in this club too :(.^ It's early fall here too, very cool so early as well, bleh.

michele11
09-20-2014, 07:17 AM
I swear every year about the time I got pregnant I feel just like I did. I guess it was so I wouldn't conceive again. I just remembered I have a hair color app and I almost forgot and don't wanna go but if I sit for 3hours and spend the money hopefully it'll make me get ready for a trip.

lynn2009
09-20-2014, 07:36 AM
I also feel pressured to change my appearance. Last night I just didn't feel "strippery" enough. There's all these girls with fake boobs, fake lashes, fake nails and fake tans. They all look very stripper-esque...and here I am: pale, flat chested, red headed, normal lashes and nails. I feel like a plain Jane. Don't know if I should alter my appearance to look more the part, or stay with my current look to stand out? I feel like a plan "girl next door" competing with girls who looks like porn stars. :(

Same...I've always been fairly confident in my appearance at clubs, with makeup on & the lighting but last night was my first Friday at a more upscale club whereas I have always been at dives or midtier places before and oh my god... There were some GORGEOUS women there. I really want this club to work out as I think the earnings potential is higher but it's just SO different than what I'm used to. Last night, a Friday in this upscale place it was the worst night I've ever had. Awful.

whirlerz
09-20-2014, 08:19 AM
I know you can rock it out, Lynn!^

Ok, here goes:
Please don't quote this, thanks.
I am completely humiliated, embarassed, & ashamed. I've being 'helped' by an SD (platonic). We got together thru a mutual 'business assoc.' that's now trying her damnedest to throw me under the bus..
I've had some dental surgery, with more to go I showed him the bill/prescription receipts & he totally makes fun of me & my situation..I've been also trying to get an exit strategy in place..applying for vanilla jobs, trying to shake off depression/self doubt to audition,(in all this I'm trying to rest up as much as possible to heal completely/be ready for my next upcoming surgery)
I can't really cam cause my internet/computer arent' the best, also looking into finding another SD.
I've been saving as best I can, have to live in a motel right now due to some other issues. I've also considered arbnb, roommates, & short/long term sub leases, with the latter being my 1st choice..but can't do it w/my dental work/car work coming up.
I'd seriously really rather support myself/be on my own.
Anyway, thanks for reading, sorry so long.

wednesday86
09-20-2014, 08:56 AM
Same...I've always been fairly confident in my appearance at clubs, with makeup on & the lighting but last night was my first Friday at a more upscale club whereas I have always been at dives or midtier places before and oh my god... There were some GORGEOUS women there. I really want this club to work out as I think the earnings potential is higher but it's just SO different than what I'm used to. Last night, a Friday in this upscale place it was the worst night I've ever had. Awful.

Yep I'm also in the most upscale club I've ever worked at. I'm used to being one of the prettiest girls on the roster at mid tier places. My last shift I could tell I was being very much ignored for the Barbies and it was first time I've felt like an ugly duckling there. I had a lot of guys go with the Barbies right after I talked to them. I can handle that most of the time, and always happens once in a while, but when it's all night? Ouch!

audrey_k
09-20-2014, 02:14 PM
I feel like there is something wrong with me... I am OBSESSED with finding fault in any relationship I have with a man. A few days go everything was fine, and then my flatmade made this off-hand comment about how he must come from a super wealthy/old money family because of where he went to university and what he does, and now I've flown into this insecurity mode about "I'm not good enough for him! why would someone like that want to date a sex worker? He'll never want to introduce me to his mum, that's what the hold up is here"
???
Do I have any evidence of this? None, but that hasn't stopped me from obsessing and going over it all day as I've been moving, the taxi driver was like "you seem very deep in thought" and I was, first thinking about this and then trying to think about how I can find proof of my theory from him without sounding like a psycho.
t don't understand why I do this, I felt 100% FINE about where we were on Thursday/Friday morning and now I'm flipping... even though the man is on a stag weekend and has been keeping me updated for the last two days. I don't know why I analyze shit to death? Is it an OCD thing, a very intense insecurity, or do I just not want to be happy and have to find fault in everything?
The sad thing is, my relationships always start off this way, super bumpy and up and down, and then everything fine, and then I get bored, and then I cheat on them... it's like I'm addicted to the drama.

tuesdaymarie
09-21-2014, 08:34 AM
Oh my god. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but Netflix is adding all the seasons of Gilmore Girls in October, and I am stoked. It's all I'm going to do in the cold fall weather--whip up some coffee and giggle like a little bitch about pop culture references and strong female relationships.

I will show myself out now.

whirlerz
09-21-2014, 09:36 AM
Oh my god. I'm embarrassed to admit this, but Netflix is adding all the seasons of Gilmore Girls in October, and I am stoked. It's all I'm going to do in the cold fall weather--whip up some coffee and giggle like a little bitch about pop culture references and strong female relationships.

I will show myself out now.

Nah, it's all good..this's from someone who watches "Girls Next Door"::)

I am so tired, lazy, & slothful today:( Very cool, blah & overcast out.

NikkiMonroe
09-21-2014, 09:44 AM
I had sex with someone at a bar in his truck - the sex was great and I thought he was a total douche bag, so I played it like I was using him rather than the other way around. The night after we fucked I found out he donated 300 dollars earlier that night to a cystic fibrosis benefit. Not the douche bag I thought he was after all. Now I want to get to know him better but that's impossible after a one night stand, I think. Just goes to show that you can't judge a book by its cover.

fishielicious
09-21-2014, 12:16 PM
Nah, it's all good..this's from someone who watches "Girls Next Door"::)
LOL I love Girls Next Door. Definite guilty pleasure. I wish I looked more like Holly Madison and was as cute and bubbly as Bridget.

My confessions for today: The other night I started my period while I was having sex with this guy... I had warned him beforehand that I thought I was going to start soon and told him he couldn't eat me out because of it, but he insisted he still wanted to have sex. But still, after we were done he left the room to go get a glass of water and when I saw blood on the sheets I freaked out and just made the bed real quick and got him to drive me home right then. I feel really bad for not telling him and feel like at this point I'm just gonna cut my losses and figure he's never gonna call again. Oh well. It was a really nice date beforehand, too, he took me to a really nice dinner and then to see the Evil Dead musical. Ugh I'm the worst. Really though it's probably better if he doesn't call me because I'm still suffering from an all-time low libido and am probably not much fun to date right now.

Also, I'm really struggling with whether or not to tell my family about me dancing. I'm really close with my parents and go out to see them every weekend. I hate lying to them but I also really don't want to disappoint them. I'm planning a really long strip trip for next summer and while I've told them about my plans to travel, I haven't told them how I'll be supporting myself while I do, and they're bound to ask eventually. I don't know.

Adrienne26
09-21-2014, 02:05 PM
Not serious by any means, but I just ordered NFL RedZone today. I'm fucking obsessed. I LOVE efficient things and this just gets 'er done. I have seriously thought about masturbating to how amazingly efficient and incredible this channel is.

audrey_k
09-21-2014, 03:03 PM
I feel like such a horrible person but I am considering getting rid of my kitten... he is SO damn cute and sweet and I've wanted a cat more than anything for months now, but this is more work than I thought I was signing up for. I've had cats my whole life and what I love about them is that they're independent-- I could never handle all the attention and work a dog demands which is why I have serious doubts as to my ability to ever have children. But this cat is like the NEEDIEST cat I have ever had in my life. He has so much fucking energy he just flies around the room, he can't be calm and just sit and be petted, he wants to play ALL the time and by that, he wants to bite and scratch-- he's not doing it in a malicious, want to hurt you way, he's just playing. And if he isn't with me, or I'm ignoring him, he will just MEOW MEOW MEOW. Like for HOURS. I have no idea how his lungs haven't given out, but I put him in the bathroom for an hour and he literally did not stop the entire time. He now has an entire flat to run around in-- two fucking floors!-- and all he wants to do it jump around my bed and drive me crazy. I love him and he's adorable but this is just too much. And I'm seriously worried about maybe getting noise complaints from my neighbors for the meowing or my clients getting super annoyed about it when they start coming by in a couple weeks.

LilyAnderson
09-21-2014, 03:29 PM
My mother and father divorced when I was 11. My father decided to date my mothers best friend who later became my step-mother.
I avoid her and her children as much as humanly possible..but whenever I do see her, I think about all of the ways I can light her hair on fire (because she goes through a can of hairspray a day. That is no exaggeration.)

ava$
09-21-2014, 03:33 PM
I've been feeling like this as well and it's only getting worse. Even anti deppesants aren't helping. Here's to us feeling better soon!:)

Why so sad michele? U have such a good life and your beautiful, you should be happy :) <3

ava$
09-21-2014, 03:33 PM
I've been feeling like this as well and it's only getting worse. Even anti deppesants aren't helping. Here's to us feeling better soon!:)

Why so sad michele? U have such a good life and your beautiful, you should be happy :) <3

michele11
09-21-2014, 03:50 PM
LOL I love Girls Next Door. Definite guilty pleasure. I wish I looked more like Holly Madison and was as cute and bubbly as Bridget.

My confessions for today: The other night I started my period while I was having sex with this guy... I had warned him beforehand that I thought I was going to start soon and told him he couldn't eat me out because of it, but he insisted he still wanted to have sex. But still, after we were done he left the room to go get a glass of water and when I saw blood on the sheets I freaked out and just made the bed real quick and got him to drive me home right then. I feel really bad for not telling him and feel like at this point I'm just gonna cut my losses and figure he's never gonna call again. Oh well. It was a really nice date beforehand, too, he took me to a really nice dinner and then to see the Evil Dead musical. Ugh I'm the worst. Really though it's probably better if he doesn't call me because I'm still suffering from an all-time low libido and am probably not much fun to date right now.

Also, I'm really struggling with whether or not to tell my family about me dancing. I'm really close with my parents and go out to see them every weekend. I hate lying to them but I also really don't want to disappoint them. I'm planning a really long strip trip for next summer and while I've told them about my plans to travel, I haven't told them how I'll be supporting myself while I do, and they're bound to ask eventually. I don't know.
Most guys don't get freaked out by blood. I'm sure you won't scare him away that easy. i remember years ago when I was a teenager fucking this guy on my period and he took nude pics of me. ( Haha, back then you had them developed ) and in the mall we worked together. i was appauled when I saw them it looked like I was posing naked at a crime scene. lol.

michele11
09-21-2014, 03:56 PM
I feel like such a horrible person but I am considering getting rid of my kitten... he is SO damn cute and sweet and I've wanted a cat more than anything for months now, but this is more work than I thought I was signing up for. I've had cats my whole life and what I love about them is that they're independent-- I could never handle all the attention and work a dog demands which is why I have serious doubts as to my ability to ever have children. But this cat is like the NEEDIEST cat I have ever had in my life. He has so much fucking energy he just flies around the room, he can't be calm and just sit and be petted, he wants to play ALL the time and by that, he wants to bite and scratch-- he's not doing it in a malicious, want to hurt you way, he's just playing. And if he isn't with me, or I'm ignoring him, he will just MEOW MEOW MEOW. Like for HOURS. I have no idea how his lungs haven't given out, but I put him in the bathroom for an hour and he literally did not stop the entire time. He now has an entire flat to run around in-- two fucking floors!-- and all he wants to do it jump around my bed and drive me crazy. I love him and he's adorable but this is just too much. And I'm seriously worried about maybe getting noise complaints from my neighbors for the meowing or my clients getting super annoyed about it when they start coming by in a couple weeks.

My kitten is kinda like that too. he'll grow out of it if you can wait it out. i kinda feel the same way because I didn't travel when my other was a kitten and I know my daughter doesn't take care of him like me( and he cries at her door for like half hour. Also he'll calm down when you neutered. How old is he?

michele11
09-21-2014, 03:59 PM
:-*
Why so sad michele? U have such a good life and your beautiful, you should be happy :) <3

I don't know it just happened a few weeks ago. i couldn't get out of bed and I'm so exhausted. Call when you have time.

michele11
09-21-2014, 04:01 PM
^Oh and thank you for the kind words.:)

audrey_k
09-21-2014, 04:27 PM
My confessions for today: The other night I started my period while I was having sex with this guy... I had warned him beforehand that I thought I was going to start soon and told him he couldn't eat me out because of it, but he insisted he still wanted to have sex. But still, after we were done he left the room to go get a glass of water and when I saw blood on the sheets I freaked out and just made the bed real quick and got him to drive me home right then. I feel really bad for not telling him and feel like at this point I'm just gonna cut my losses and figure he's never gonna call again. Oh well. It was a really nice date beforehand, too, he took me to a really nice dinner and then to see the Evil Dead musical. Ugh I'm the worst. Really though it's probably better if he doesn't call me because I'm still suffering from an all-time low libido and am probably not much fun to date right now.


This happened to me a couple years go, except 1000x worse... I had started dating this guy back in June, we went out on like 6 dates, and then I left for 6 weeks to go to England... I fucked up on my BC on the way back and my period stopped for a day and a half so I thought I was in clear. I was not. I bled EVERYWHERE-- omfg I have never seen that much blood, I have no idea how we didn't realize it while he was banging me, but it was all in this corner and when he was checking his emails I saw it and tried to go wash it discretely (we were at his place) and he followed me in the kitchen. I don't think I've ever been so mortified but he was just laughing at me for being so embarrassed. He seriously did not give a fuck.

We ended up dating for a year.


My kitten is kinda like that too. he'll grow out of it if you can wait it out. i kinda feel the same way because I didn't travel when my other was a kitten and I know my daughter doesn't take care of him like me( and he cries at her door for like half hour. Also he'll calm down when you neutered. How old is he?
He's probably about two months. He's really little, he probably should still be with his mum but the people who had the litter just wanted to get their money as fast as possible. I've had kittens before but they've never been this insane, I remember them just sleeping a lot. But I wasn't home all day when I had them, and I've been quite agitated all week so it's possible I'm overreacting, I'm home all day everyday recovering from surgery and I'm antsy and bored and etc etc. We've also been cooped up in a tiny room together for the last 5 days, I'm hoping now that he's got a whole flat to himself he'll be able to tire himself out running around.
The two things I absolutely cannot deal with are sleeping-- he won't leave me alone while I'm sleeping for more than 5 hours, and I have tried everything from lying completely still, giving him not response, holding him down and petting him, and pleading with him like he's a human being and NOTHING works, he has to be locked in a bathroom to which he will whine for hours and hours and at this point I can sleep through it, but I don't want my neighbors complaining about a cat whining, since he's not even supposed to be here. And the biting/scrathing playing really does me in... I've got cat scratches all over my body and I feel like nothing I do shows him he CAN'T play that that. I've tried clapping my hands, spraying him with water, and pushing his nose-- the last two will stop him for a minute, but ten minutes later he's back doing the same damn thing.

fishielicious
09-21-2014, 04:43 PM
This happened to me a couple years go, except 1000x worse... I had started dating this guy back in June, we went out on like 6 dates, and then I left for 6 weeks to go to England... I fucked up on my BC on the way back and my period stopped for a day and a half so I thought I was in clear. I was not. I bled EVERYWHERE-- omfg I have never seen that much blood, I have no idea how we didn't realize it while he was banging me, but it was all in this corner and when he was checking his emails I saw it and tried to go wash it discretely (we were at his place) and he followed me in the kitchen. I don't think I've ever been so mortified but he was just laughing at me for being so embarrassed. He seriously did not give a fuck.

HA I thought about trying to do something like that but it was like 3:00am, I was drunk and basically just thought, "Nope fuck it."


Most guys don't get freaked out by blood. I'm sure you won't scare him away that easy. i remember years ago when I was a teenager fucking this guy on my period and he took nude pics of me. ( Haha, back then you had them developed ) and in the mall we worked together. i was appauled when I saw them it looked like I was posing naked at a crime scene. lol.

At least there was no photographic evidence of me bleeding everywhere haha. Thanks for reassuring me, ladies. Honestly, knowing this guy I would not be surprised if he didn't even notice before he went to sleep and then woke up in the morning wondering where the fuck the blood came from. We didn't get in the splatter zone at the Evil Dead musical, but he still managed to get blood-splattered by the end of the night lol.

Audrey, about your kitty (posting here I feel like I need to clarify that I mean the actual animal): I would definitely try to give it another little while, anyway. It seems like there are so few cats who stay like that as adults. I mean, I have one friend who does have a crazy, wild, intermittently violent cat but I think that's because he won't get him neutered. And my sister has a very antisocial, aggressive cat but that cat also has some health problems that apparently affect her temperament. And okay my roommate has a really horrible, unsanitary, sometimes vicious cat... Which is the main reason I'm moving out of my apartment...

OK actually yeah I know a lot of horrible cats but I still believe yours will likely turn out normal! My parents' cat used to meow and yowl and nip at you all the time when she was a kitten but she has definitely gotten quieter and calmer as an adult. She still meows a lot, but at a lower volume now, and she never bites or scratches.

michele11
09-21-2014, 04:48 PM
My sister wants to come over every day now for like the last three days. I just want to be alone and watch my lifetime movie! she called me last night( she was at walmart trying on halloween masks) and wanted to come. It was like 10pm and I just wanted to eat snack and relax. She is too hyper. Do you have anything to eat, I need to go have a ciggarette, blah, blah, blah. I feel bad because she told me to look at a pic of her in this one mask that it makes you look beautiful and she looks like me in it. Oh good she just called and she's not coming. She also keeps asking if i'm going to work and I tell her no( because everytime she comes it's a nightmare or she screws me over and I don't need the stress. She wants to come tommorrow but I need to get off my ass and get stuff done and get ready for a trip. Ok Now I'm going to go watch my lifetime movie" the sorority".

tuesdaymarie
09-21-2014, 05:19 PM
I feel like such a horrible person but I am considering getting rid of my kitten... he is SO damn cute and sweet and I've wanted a cat more than anything for months now, but this is more work than I thought I was signing up for. I've had cats my whole life and what I love about them is that they're independent-- I could never handle all the attention and work a dog demands which is why I have serious doubts as to my ability to ever have children. But this cat is like the NEEDIEST cat I have ever had in my life. He has so much fucking energy he just flies around the room, he can't be calm and just sit and be petted, he wants to play ALL the time and by that, he wants to bite and scratch-- he's not doing it in a malicious, want to hurt you way, he's just playing. And if he isn't with me, or I'm ignoring him, he will just MEOW MEOW MEOW. Like for HOURS. I have no idea how his lungs haven't given out, but I put him in the bathroom for an hour and he literally did not stop the entire time. He now has an entire flat to run around in-- two fucking floors!-- and all he wants to do it jump around my bed and drive me crazy. I love him and he's adorable but this is just too much. And I'm seriously worried about maybe getting noise complaints from my neighbors for the meowing or my clients getting super annoyed about it when they start coming by in a couple weeks.

It might sound counter-intuitive, but you should consider getting a second kitten if you want to keep him. Most people don't realize it, but cats are very social creatures and become depressed when they don't have enough interaction. He might also be a particularly social breed. My bengal is extremely social, and we had to get him a friend when he was around four months old, because I just couldn't take his constant early morning energy. If you get them together young enough especially, they bond more with each other than the human. This also makes it easier to kennel them, as they will feel more calm when kenneled with or next to their friend. But if you're going to get rid of him, definitely do it asap. Cute little kittens find homes with relative ease, but not so much when they get older.



In other news, my boyfriend and I have been talking more and more about getting married, and I'm excited about that... but then I have nightmares about what a wedding with his family (and mine) would be like. With mine, they'd barely be present if they showed at all, and it'd be another "whatever" experience, in exception to my sister, who would guilt me about wanting to be in my wedding party and take every opportunity to point out how anorexic she is or something as her credentials. But with my boyfriends family... I'd probably have an anxiety attack. I've had to stay home from their family events because of how judgy and negative they and their family friends are. I love my boyfriend, and I care about his family, but we are so incompatible at a molecular level that I just can't see a traditional wedding working out.

fishielicious
09-21-2014, 05:32 PM
My sister wants to come over every day now for like the last three days. I just want to be alone and watch my lifetime movie! she called me last night( she was at walmart trying on halloween masks) and wanted to come. It was like 10pm and I just wanted to eat snack and relax. She is too hyper. Do you have anything to eat, I need to go have a ciggarette, blah, blah, blah. I feel bad because she told me to look at a pic of her in this one mask that it makes you look beautiful and she looks like me in it. Oh good she just called and she's not coming. She also keeps asking if i'm going to work and I tell her no( because everytime she comes it's a nightmare or she screws me over and I don't need the stress. She wants to come tommorrow but I need to get off my ass and get stuff done and get ready for a trip. Ok Now I'm going to go watch my lifetime movie" the sorority".
I definitely feel you on the just wanting to be alone without people bothering you thing. My roommate is very friendly and social, and she always wants to talk to me about life when we're home at the same time and tries to get me to go out with her and do things. I'm just like, "Sorry I'm really busy with netflix right now." Is your sister also a dancer, or does she just come to your club when you're working as a customer? My roommate also keeps saying she's going to come into my club to audition and I really hope she doesn't expect me to vouch for her use me as a reference or anything because I'm not putting my good relationship with management on the line for her. She is pretty out of shape, so I don't even know that she'd get hired, and I'm confident that if she does manage to work a shift, she will hate it and probably never leave the dressing room. She really needs people to like her and she will not take rejection well.

fishielicious
09-21-2014, 05:33 PM
In other news, my boyfriend and I have been talking more and more about getting married, and I'm excited about that... but then I have nightmares about what a wedding with his family (and mine) would be like. With mine, they'd barely be present if they showed at all, and it'd be another "whatever" experience, in exception to my sister, who would guilt me about wanting to be in my wedding party and take every opportunity to point out how anorexic she is or something as her credentials. But with my boyfriends family... I'd probably have an anxiety attack. I've had to stay home from their family events because of how judgy and negative they and their family friends are. I love my boyfriend, and I care about his family, but we are so incompatible at a molecular level that I just can't see a traditional wedding working out.
Congratulations on your almost-engagement (I don't know what else to call it)! I'm sorry you're worried about the families' reactions, though. I hope everything goes better than expected, but hey, if you're both okay, it's not like you have to have a traditional wedding or even marriage to have a successful relationship. It just depends on what you need to be happy.

simone87
09-21-2014, 06:28 PM
i just left work sick..i suddenly started getting HORRIBLE cramps and pains, had to walk out on a dance, barely hobbled to the bathroom and started pouring sweat from my face, neck, legs..getting dizzy..then had it come out both ends. really gross. so embarrassing..i almost called 911, it was one of the worst stomach pains i've ever had, like miscarrying cramps or something