View Full Version : Confessions Thread!
SnuffleUffleGrass
03-09-2015, 08:19 AM
One of my regulars told me that he knows the "real" me and how much closer we are than any of the other customers.. That I see him coz I really like him and can't help myself.
And people think I have issues...fml - self delusion much
This is good. It's way better than the days when some regs come in & "confront" you about whether you feel the same way they do, etc. Ugh ugh ugh. One of my last stripping regs was a completely crazy clinger. I felt sooo sorry for him. It paid off $$$ to put up with him but I had to roll my eyes at his level of delusion.
smeca
03-09-2015, 08:28 AM
This is gross but
thrush is back and i have every possible frickin symptom. I know you just get it sometimes but i feel grossssss :(
whirlerz
03-09-2015, 08:38 AM
This is gross but
thrush is back and i have every possible frickin symptom. I know you just get it sometimes but i feel grossssss :(
Have you tried taking garlic pills for it?
Me I've had a headache for 2 days, took ibuprophen but it's not working
SweetJulia
03-09-2015, 09:59 AM
I haven't washed my hair in way longer than I care to admit, but it looks so shiny when it's filthy.
Finally washed it today :)
carmen_b
03-09-2015, 11:08 AM
I find disappearing a few days with activities you've already scheduled is a great remedy ( or screen ) for this. If he doesn't improve / make plans in advance after he sees you aren't waiting around, you can evaluate what to do.
Sorry you squished your phone,
My boy friend only pays attention to me when he feels like it lately. When he is interested, he goes all 'I miss seeing you' BS when I refuse plans made at midnight. Last night, I gave him the cold shoulder as punishment. He spent the rest of the night at the other end of the bar I was sitting at with our friends and pretended he had no clue I was mad. As a result, I had one too many drinks, drove home, and--having found a small area on the edge of my cell phone screen shattered--proceeded to smash the screen into my sink until inoperable. Best part? He still hasn't found the balls to talk to me. And I thought I was impossible....
simone87
03-09-2015, 11:21 AM
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only female alive who hasn't figured out how to style her hair.
haha i'm learning just now how to properly style my hair, after years of bleaching and frying! it gets so confusing with all the conflicting advice out there
carmen_b
03-09-2015, 11:32 AM
I'm so grateful we have friends of his to stay with while traveling but am eager to book a hotel / have just us time a day or two!
amberlly
03-09-2015, 03:35 PM
This is good. It's way better than the days when some regs come in & "confront" you about whether you feel the same way they do, etc. Ugh ugh ugh. One of my last stripping regs was a completely crazy clinger. I felt sooo sorry for him. It paid off $$$ to put up with him but I had to roll my eyes at his level of delusion.
OOh good point! My regs all seem to buy into it atm. I hear all about our special connections and get tipped for it. :) I'll just shut up and go with it.
Elektra Luxx
03-09-2015, 04:41 PM
One of my regulars told me that he knows the "real" me and how much closer we are than any of the other customers.. That I see him coz I really like him and can't help myself.
And people think I have issues...fml - self delusion much
If it has gone beyond fantasy into delusion it's emotionally draining, but I look at it as all part the game and it's steady money.
Elektra Luxx
03-09-2015, 04:49 PM
My boyfriend (I think we are together after this weekend ) has seen me with absolutely no makeup, hair undone and fat period clothes on and he still wants to be with me.
OliveJardin
03-09-2015, 05:34 PM
This is trivial, but my ex is back in town and wants to "see our cat", who was still a kitten when he left. He's texted me every morning since he arrived asking to come over or "grab a coffee". This morning he is casually having coffee a the cafe next to my apartment.
I confess I feel mean for not letting him see our pet, but the idea of getting out of bed and making pain killer induced small talk seems more painful than my boobs! I am 4 days post op from my BA revision and I can't even dress myself properly or do my own hair-so, I don't have the energy to waste.
Selina M
03-09-2015, 06:38 PM
^ Is he actually wanting to see the cat, or is this just a ploy to see you?
OliveJardin
03-09-2015, 06:50 PM
^ Is he actually wanting to see the cat, or is this just a ploy to see you?
^...well, he had a love/hate relationship with the cat because it attacked him constantly, so I'm unsure. I confess that he rang my door bell a few times just now and I didn't answer (after offering to bring me a coffee, because I declined the invite to have one with him outside). He works at the opposite end of the city. He's probably just being nice, but I just can't be bothered with the awkwardness of seeing him.
amberlly
03-09-2015, 08:23 PM
A number of my customers are deluded. It's very draining. I'm sweet naturally so gfe comes easily to me.
I need to find a way to re ground myself and switch off the act between sessions or home.
kaninchen
03-09-2015, 11:18 PM
I had a fierce need to tan tonight, but my I threw out my self tanner mitt a while back and never replaced it. So I cut up a fleece headband and used that instead.
Adapt, improvise, and overcome.
amberlly
03-10-2015, 06:06 AM
Really embarrassing but now when I was at a course they gave me a name tag and proceeded to call me by real name. I was like WHO? Pause and realise its me.
I then went to label my food with my stage name and the date like at work. Gawd im going to out myself at this rate.
sammii
03-10-2015, 10:03 AM
I can't believe I'm posting this but I google'd it and couldn't find anything so now I'm like :O Anyway, I don't drink anymore for personal reasons but I lost my mind a little bit last week and drank pretty heavily 5 days in a row, then for 4-5 days after that my pussy and even BO smelled like liquor. I know that is totally disgusting, but I can't find anything on Google. I don't think I've ever had my pussy and body odor strongly smell of liquor for 4 days after drinking.
I know I'm gross. I feel like this would end up on Reddit or something.
Vyanka
03-10-2015, 11:31 AM
What a fucked up way to start the year...
I have an aunt who is dying in the hospital, for about a month :(
My poor cousin lost his wife over the wknd due to brain cancer. He loved her so much! He married her knowing her condition and it only lasted 5 years. That's true love. I hope he finds love again later on. He's a great guy.
An old friend of mine just had an 8 hour heart surgery.
I got sick last month, but ok now.
Omg. What else?? :-/
michele11
03-10-2015, 01:37 PM
Haha. I wanted to get exercise so I was running up and down two flights of stairs. I did it about 10 times and I saw someone peeking put the window at me. lol. And I'm obsessed with the lays thing. I fell asleep watching tv and then got in bed and couldn't go back to bed because I was thinking of all the new flavors to come up with. lol.
simone87
03-10-2015, 01:53 PM
I can't believe I'm posting this but I google'd it and couldn't find anything so now I'm like :O Anyway, I don't drink anymore for personal reasons but I lost my mind a little bit last week and drank pretty heavily 5 days in a row, then for 4-5 days after that my pussy and even BO smelled like liquor. I know that is totally disgusting, but I can't find anything on Google. I don't think I've ever had my pussy and body odor strongly smell of liquor for 4 days after drinking.
I know I'm gross. I feel like this would end up on Reddit or something.
this happened to me when i ODed..the next 5 days my hair, skin, everything smelled like the substance i ODed on. it was literally coming out of my pores and making me gag
michele11
03-10-2015, 03:07 PM
^ I can always smell when people are on drugs.
sammii
03-10-2015, 03:15 PM
this happened to me when i ODed..the next 5 days my hair, skin, everything smelled like the substance i ODed on. it was literally coming out of my pores and making me gag
That makes sense. Well I had a bunch of text messages open from people I gave my number to on Tinder. So if I was on Tinder I must've been drunk. I had 8 of those 100-Proof shooters within an hour on an empty stomach (no, I'm not saying that to sound coo,' I lost my mind after that much that fast) and I'm small so yeah, I'm not surprised my pussy and armpits smelled like booze for 5 days. Annnnd this is why I'm sober - everything I just said above.
That's interesting I can't smell drugs and I've never heard of drugs having scents on people.
OliveJardin
03-10-2015, 05:30 PM
I can't believe I'm posting this but I google'd it and couldn't find anything so now I'm like :O Anyway, I don't drink anymore for personal reasons but I lost my mind a little bit last week and drank pretty heavily 5 days in a row, then for 4-5 days after that my pussy and even BO smelled like liquor. I know that is totally disgusting, but I can't find anything on Google. I don't think I've ever had my pussy and body odor strongly smell of liquor for 4 days after drinking.
I know I'm gross. I feel like this would end up on Reddit or something.
^It's probably your body releasing the toxins, if you have a clean routine you probably notice it more than people who drink regularly. A detox might help to flush the nasty things out of your system.
I confess that I was going to save getting my hair done and topping up my botox until I was back at work, but after my boobie ordeal I feel like I deserve to treat myself! They are booked in for Friday the 13th-maybe it wasn't such a good idea ::).
xStacey
03-10-2015, 09:01 PM
I absolutely cannot stand guys who do not shave their armpits. It wouldn't be so bad if they did not wear tank tops or tee shirts with very short sleeves and put their arms behind their head. It makes me :ill: when I see so much hair, they don't even trim and it's very lengthy. :ill:
whirlerz
03-10-2015, 09:26 PM
Haha. I wanted to get exercise so I was running up and down two flights of stairs. I did it about 10 times and I saw someone peeking put the window at me. lol. And I'm obsessed with the lays thing. I fell asleep watching tv and then got in bed and couldn't go back to bed because I was thinking of all the new flavors to come up with. lol.
I'm gonna try that..I've been on the 2nd floor (got moved w/the renovation) so I think even that (normal going up/down) helps. It's gr8 exercise
I now have another spider bit, on part of my eyelid & just above..bright red/swollen. going to try 2 remember the meat tenderizer to put on it.
OliveJardin
03-11-2015, 12:39 AM
I confess that I thought about keeping the pretty, bright blue rubber bands from my asparagus for work lol.
amberlly
03-11-2015, 05:59 AM
I spent the day doing finger painting and mixing paint. No actual school work but it was awesome
Kellydancer
03-11-2015, 10:15 AM
I absolutely cannot stand guys who do not shave their armpits. It wouldn't be so bad if they did not wear tank tops or tee shirts with very short sleeves and put their arms behind their head. It makes me :ill: when I see so much hair, they don't even trim and it's very lengthy. :ill:
I thought I was the only one. I once dated a man with long stringy armpit hair and it was gross.
Tsepmet1
03-11-2015, 10:37 AM
I have a customer that pays to cuddle, and he sends me gift cards via email every so often.
So today he sent an email talking about his recovery from depression, how he's seeing the world again with optimism, yada yada. That's great for him! However, now I'm feeling guilty, because I think that he views our relationship as more than a business arrangement. I'm all for being friendly, and I'll lend him an ear if he needs someone to talk to, but I kind of want to nip this in the bud before/in case he becomes delusional.
My confession is that I'm going to miss those gift cards.
Elektra Luxx
03-11-2015, 12:10 PM
I absolutely cannot stand guys who do not shave their armpits. It wouldn't be so bad if they did not wear tank tops or tee shirts with very short sleeves and put their arms behind their head. It makes me :ill: when I see so much hair, they don't even trim and it's very lengthy. :ill:
Too funny, I really did LOL because my younger sister and I saw this guy with large tufts of hair coming from his arm pits and she said "he looks like he's hiding a couple of cats".
xStacey
03-11-2015, 01:54 PM
Being a full-time student, I don't work that many days and even when school's out, I don't ever want to spend entire weeks at the club but sometimes, I can't help myself from envying the money girls who constantly work 5-6 days weekly must make lol
michele11
03-11-2015, 02:46 PM
I'm gonna try that..I've been on the 2nd floor (got moved w/the renovation) so I think even that (normal going up/down) helps. It's gr8 exercise
I now have another spider bit, on part of my eyelid & just above..bright red/swollen. going to try 2 remember the meat tenderizer to put on it.
It's great for your ass. When I work in clubs with stairs after about a week my ass starts looking mighty fine.
kaninchen
03-11-2015, 09:06 PM
I finally made it out of the house only to be mistaken for a mannequin when I stopped to look in an antique store. This has happened to me so many times. What the fuck am I doing wrong that people think I'm a giant doll?!? Agghh!
This is a confession because it's too confusing and weird to be a petty annoyance.
zoezoebelle
03-11-2015, 09:34 PM
Could have fucked another guy tonight after my boyfriend was being a gigantic douche bag. Instead came back home early only to overhear him complaining about me to his buddies (who I've also met in person) and then saying, "At least the sex was good." Wish I'd fucked another guy so hard now. There's time. I wish I could punch him in the face.
Elektra Luxx
03-11-2015, 10:04 PM
My little brother is on spring break this week and I promised him several weeks that he could spend the night we would stay up all night playing video games. The plans were made before I got involved with my current bf. So I told my bf my plans and he said "so I guess that means no...umm...canoodling". "Afraid not" I said. He said he wanted come over anyway to meet my brother. I guess they hit it off, fast forward to now and they are still playing video games in the living room and I'm at the kitchen table reading SW.
Confession: I'm happy my 2 favorite guys are getting along great. I am SO going to give my bf some hot canoodling tomorrow.
Aurora_Sunset
03-12-2015, 10:11 AM
All my attempts to start becoming a productive "morning person" have been completely dashed by the return of nighttime anxiety attacks that make it difficult for me to fall or stay asleep, and are starting to even prevent me from trying because I'm scared to lie in bed with nothing to distract my mind. And then I wake up late, go through the day stressed about how I'm not on schedule, skipping things that I wanted to get done...and then approaching nighttime feeling lazy, stupid, and like my to-do list for the next day has just gotten longer, therefore increasing the things I have to be anxious and depressed about. It's a vicious circle. :-\
The real confession is that I know I would be able to sleep better next to someone. When I used to live with roommates who knew about this, they would let me sleep with them if I was having a bad night. But nowadays, I have no one left to really call. The last few nights, I have almost succumbed to calling up my neighbor. However, we're not that close and I would feel horribly embarrassed revealing something like that to him. I'm scared I'm gonna actually give in one of these nights just out of desperation and convenience... and then have to move across the country to escape the shame.
audrey_k
03-12-2015, 10:41 AM
All my attempts to start becoming a productive "morning person" have been completely dashed by the return of nighttime anxiety attacks that make it difficult for me to fall or stay asleep, and are starting to even prevent me from trying because I'm scared to lie in bed with nothing to distract my mind. And then I wake up late, go through the day stressed about how I'm not on schedule, skipping things that I wanted to get done...and then approaching nighttime feeling lazy, stupid, and like my to-do list for the next day has just gotten longer, therefore increasing the things I have to be anxious and depressed about. It's a vicious circle. :-\
The real confession is that I know I would be able to sleep better next to someone, but have no one left to really call. The last few nights, I have almost succumbed to calling up my neighbor. However, we're not that close and I would feel horribly embarrassed revealing something like that to him. I'm scared I'm gonna actually give in one of these nights just out of desperation and convenience... and then have to move across the country to escape the shame.
I feel your pain, I've been going through the exact same thing the last month. I've barely been surviving financially with short temp jobs (I think I may have just gotten an offer for something more long term but don't want get my hopes up) and the mental stress of applying for SO much work and getting nowhere and being alone all day doing nothing has put my anxiety into crazy levels. I don't even want to go to bed half the time because I just obsess over finding work, how much money is in my account, am I going to have to ask my boyfriend for more money, what expenses are coming through, how low is my savings now... I freaked out so much a couple weeks ago I just burst into tears out of nowhere and scared the shit out of my boyfriend who was asleep. I feel like I can't just lie there I'll go nuts, so I sit on my phone for hours until I can barely keep my eyes open and know I'll fall asleep quickly, and that means I'm sleeping in until noon and losing the morning to get anything done, returning phone calls in the afternoon which looks shitty. I've been trying to get off the sleeping pills I've been using for years, but I've had to up my dose, otherwise there's no way I'll ever sleep.
It also really doesn't help that my boyfriend has a horrible cold and is basically like sleeping next to a train at the moment he's snoring so much as his nose is completely clogged. I know it's not his fault but I seriously want to put a pillow over his face when he wakes me up after I've finally fell asleep...
Elektra Luxx
03-12-2015, 02:36 PM
I just passed on an easy 2, maybe 3 hour appointment for a regular in town tomorrow evening. I apologized that I couldn't make it due to a previous engagement, but I know someone who I know he would really like. This is the first time I have suggested this, but he's nice and pretty easy going and he agreed.
It's her first time, but I trust her and I know she won't steal my client and I told her can keep whatever she makes. She's extremely nervous, but I told her he's a real sweetheart I've known for years, some talking, some drinking, maybe room service, business for 15 to 20 minutes, cuddling and maybe a shower.
michele11
03-12-2015, 03:01 PM
I absolutely cannot stand guys who do not shave their armpits. It wouldn't be so bad if they did not wear tank tops or tee shirts with very short sleeves and put their arms behind their head. It makes me :ill: when I see so much hair, they don't even trim and it's very lengthy. :ill:
Oh shit I read this wrong. I love armpit hair. Especially when a guy has big arms. It just turns me on but I like hair down below too. Lol.
zoezoebelle
03-12-2015, 03:19 PM
Currently in that wonderful post-breakup high. Wondering if I'll end up fucking more older guys to get my kicks out, or if I'll be good for once and just not have sex for a while. Not have sex for a while? That sounds so awful, bleh. Who needs mature relationships?
kaninchen
03-12-2015, 04:54 PM
I have an OTC fetish regular who has been a financial lifeline while I've been depressed. I'm supposed to see him tonight for an hour of dinner and having my feet licked but I seriously doubt that I can do it. I would rather stay in bed and read than go make the easiest $400 ever. Lazzzyyyyy!
Selina M
03-12-2015, 10:31 PM
Today I shut my overachiever off. Gasp!
Instead of being hard on myself and taking it personally when I don't make much $$ (even when the club is empty except for lookee-loos and regular barflies), I said to hell with it and gave myself permission to be lazy. I didn't go into emotionless machine mode and force myself to approach every single person, and I spent a lot of time lounging in vacant chairs, shooting the shit with the doorman, and pretty much only approached guys who've bought from me before.
I made absolutely jack shit but I actually felt pretty cheerful when I left. Now I'm enjoying Mexican food and a margarita, gonna go take a bath and 'stripperfy', and am excited to kill it tomorrow. I guess sometimes you need to step back and just chill out and enjoy the fun parts of the job.
lynn2009
03-13-2015, 09:08 AM
Free food at vanilla job means I just had 2 donuts and a pretzel for lunch. Oops.
simone87
03-13-2015, 10:02 AM
no gym membership because i dont have a credit card, 30 degrees and windy out, shin splints and need to heal and i need to shed 10 pounds as soon as humanly possible so i can go back to work. I'm so depressed about it right now i feel like pulling the covers over my head and having a panic attack
xStacey
03-13-2015, 12:35 PM
I hate people who, not only keep bragging and bragging about themselves but also have to put other people down in order to feel good.
I went out for lunch with this civilian chick because I figured, hmmm it would be nice to have a female friend. During the whole time, she kept talking about how her major (biology) is so much more difficult than mine (social sciences). How my degree is soooo easy and unscientific, all my classes are bird courses. She even said (I am still not sure if she was joking or not) : ''hey one class for me is like 3 classes for you''. Huh, simply no. I don’t think she spends 30 hours per week per 3 credits class. She kept complaining about how her work-load is so heavy and difficult compared to mine but then says she spends 5 days with her boyfriend per week and always says has nothing to do (whereas I spend the amount of time she spends with her boyfriend at the library).
Then we talked about work (she knows about my job and once said she would never be able to do it). She was complaining (again) about how her job at the clothing store is fun but so much more stressful compared to mine because my job is SOOO EASY IT’S RIDICULOUS. Yeah okay, go put on some heels & a bikini, try working for a night at a heavy contact club being fondled by strange men all night then come back and tell me about how it’s soooo much easier than working minimum wage at a clothing store. I’d choose to sell clothes if it paid the same. Ugh.
Pretty sure she wouldn’t have liked it if I bragged about how my GPA is soooo much higher than hers, how I make soooo much more money than her and how my boobs are soooo much bigger.
amberlly
03-13-2015, 07:09 PM
I hate people who, not only keep bragging and bragging about themselves but also have to put other people down in order to feel good.
I went out for lunch with this civilian chick because I figured, hmmm it would be nice to have a female friend. During the whole time, she kept talking about how her major (biology) is so much more difficult than mine (social sciences). How my degree is soooo easy and unscientific, all my classes are bird courses. She even said (I am still not sure if she was joking or not) : ''hey one class for me is like 3 classes for you''. Huh, simply no. I don’t think she spends 30 hours per week per 3 credits class. She kept complaining about how her work-load is so heavy and difficult compared to mine but then says she spends 5 days with her boyfriend per week and always says has nothing to do (whereas I spend the amount of time she spends with her boyfriend at the library).
Then we talked about work (she knows about my job and once said she would never be able to do it). She was complaining (again) about how her job at the clothing store is fun but so much more stressful compared to mine because my job is SOOO EASY IT’S RIDICULOUS. Yeah okay, go put on some heels & a bikini, try working for a night at a heavy contact club being fondled by strange men all night then come back and tell me about how it’s soooo much easier than working minimum wage at a clothing store. I’d choose to sell clothes if it paid the same. Ugh.
Pretty sure she wouldn’t have liked it if I bragged about how my GPA is soooo much higher than hers, how I make soooo much more money than her and how my boobs are soooo much bigger.
What an insecure cow. I hate people like that. They are just scared and lashing out to prevent anyone working out they are a fraud. Scared that you have the balls to do what it takes to get ahead.
Guess she didn't count on you being smart enough to see through her. You already won that one just by being who are you are.
amberlly
03-13-2015, 07:15 PM
I just discovered cider. Never drank it before. Its actually awesome.
zoezoebelle
03-13-2015, 10:48 PM
I hate how much I want to walk down the hall, open my ex's door and hold him again. I know every time I go through a breakup it's hard to let go, and I know it's irrational and stupid. I wish I could wisen myself up. But I miss him, even though he's not right for me. I miss holding him so much. I don't know if I ever even loved him.
Selina M
03-14-2015, 04:13 PM
I've been tired of dancing full time for the last 2 weeks, and saying I want a vanilla job so I can drop dancing to part time.
Now I've found at least 3 jobs I could probably get, in the field I'm getting a 2nd degree in... but the idea of re-tooling my resume, writing a kissass-y cover letter and trying to impress someone in an interview to get a $12/hr job, makes me snort and think, yeah fucking right.
... I think I wasn't actually fully burned out. Sweet.
amberlly
03-15-2015, 04:50 AM
I've taken a break from work and just studying. Its killing me. Im gaining weight and feel disgusting. I need to go back to work ASAP.