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_Avery_
08-30-2010, 04:08 PM
Delete.

Glamgirl
08-30-2010, 05:00 PM
Got chatting to an old fuck buddy/friend tonight with his new gf and felt kinda good about myself! She was clearly just a little pawn who did what she was told and doted on every word of his, he had gaind lots of weight and asked for my number to "keep in touch over films i should see" haha

Tasha_xoxo
08-31-2010, 12:52 AM
I still love her, but sometimes I find myself not "liking" her you know? I'm tired of the calls that she doesn't know what to do with herself when she's not working / that she doesn't know how to be happy ect. I do my best to extend invites (I believe you create your own life and you are responsible for your happiness ), but she is always difficult. I don't have the patience anymore for difficult.

thats pretty much the problem,,she always makes herself feel bad about everything,,and is always depressed,,i cant be around people like that,,it totally brings my mood down and i very much agree with what you said about creating your own happiness.

Tasha_xoxo
08-31-2010, 12:58 AM
also, I honestly get jealous sometimes. Like, some girls at work don't even have to try. There's a girl who TURNS down lap dances sometimes. A lot of times, she'll just be sitting there, tired/sad/bored/uninterested, and guys will still come up to her. While, it's like pulling teeth for me to sometimes get a dance. She is a beautiful girl, and I guess I get jealous because I just wish it was that easy for me.
That probably sounds bad, I know, but those are my confessions for the day. <3

i know what you mean i get jealous of a lot of girls too,,and the girl who TURNS down dances well she must not need the money as bad as the girls who bust their asses tryin to get one. thats sucks,,i would get annoyed if there were girls who didnt even have to try to get a dance,,id take advantage of them coming up to me.

Tasha_xoxo
08-31-2010, 12:59 AM
Even the most boring person in the world goes through a lot of changes in 11 years. We can't be expected to keep these people in our lives until we die. Try to put less pressure on yourself to keep this friendship. Maybe it's time to just start gently drifting away from her...

yeah i think your right.

Firewall
08-31-2010, 02:59 AM
I'm so much happier now that I've left my husband, but I still get emotional and stressed about everything, and that makes me feel terrible cause I don't want to let what he and I had make me upset anymore. This is especially true since I'm seeing a boy I went to highschool with and he's better for me than my husband ever was, and I don't want to let my ex get me down!

pixierocksonthepole
08-31-2010, 09:25 AM
I confess I'm working in a haunted house this Halloween and the first night I had nightmares the little bit of sleep I got. I am claustrophobic, so bad that I can't even sleep in a bunk bed without crying. But after yesterday going back again, I'm feeling better about it because I got one of the biggest rooms. ;D

_Avery_
08-31-2010, 01:11 PM
Delete.

hot4ablackchick
08-31-2010, 02:53 PM
I confess:
I had a dirty dream about my DJ!
It's gonna be awkward at work. :l

So did I!!!

Confession: I cheated on my husband. I made out with and fooled around with a guy. I went to his house after work. We didn't have any sort of sex, but I don't feel guilty at all. My hubby is also a really great hubby, and our marriage is wonderful. He is not an asshole and treats me great. He trusts me, and I love him, BUT I am bored. I am not a monogomous type of person. I really wanna fuck this new guy. The new guy also does NOT know that I'm married. I'm a terrible wife :-[

charlie61
08-31-2010, 02:57 PM
^ Well, everyone does what they do for a reason.

Even though you say you have a wonderful marriage, maybe it's not your ideal marriage. Bored living isn't living. Not that I condone cheating, but...yeah.

Jessie_tinydancer
08-31-2010, 05:45 PM
So did I!!!

Confession: I cheated on my husband. I made out with and fooled around with a guy. I went to his house after work. We didn't have any sort of sex, but I don't feel guilty at all. My hubby is also a really great hubby, and our marriage is wonderful. He is not an asshole and treats me great. He trusts me, and I love him, BUT I am bored. I am not a monogomous type of person. I really wanna fuck this new guy. The new guy also does NOT know that I'm married. I'm a terrible wife :-[

You are not a terrible wife. Im a believer in everything happens for a reason. For whatever reason you needed that. Sounds like hubby is a great guy though so make sure you keep him happy too. LOL You will be a busy girl! }:D

hot4ablackchick
08-31-2010, 10:24 PM
^ Well, everyone does what they do for a reason.

Even though you say you have a wonderful marriage, maybe it's not your ideal marriage. Bored living isn't living. Not that I condone cheating, but...yeah.

Maybe. I don't think monogomy is ideal for me. I wish I could say something *bad* about my hubby. He's very attentive and great. We still have good sex. Just no amount of "spice" is going to change how I feel. I can't imagine living without him, but I absolutely cannot just fuck him for the rest of my life either. He would be devastated if he found out. I don't want to hurt him, I just have needs that he could never meet or probably understand. I've been talking to him about an open marriage for the past year now, but I don't think it would go over well if he knew I was with other men. We also have 6 kids involved. So I wouldn't feel right just calling it quits, and I love him. I know I should NOT be cheating. It isn't right and I am putting my family in jeopardy. It just felt sooooooo good.

carmen_b
09-01-2010, 08:40 PM
I broke a dancer promise to myself. I tried to work on day 1 of cycle which is a no no anyway ( day before+ day one are club free days for my emotional health ). So I made myself go anyway ... showed up in town too late to get fingerprinted ( the club didn't tell me about that part, just to go get licensed at city hall ). I'm still fucking furious. I'm back where I was but I'm so pissed at myself. It's part the place ( they didn't tell to go earlier ) but part my fault too because I didn't research it and just tore off. I should know better than to trust anything someone on the phone at a club says and to double/triple check... but instead I just wasted 7 hours and $38 in gas money. And I ate a bunch of shitty food too. Fuck. Day one of cycle = stay home in jammies and try not to kill anyone. Why can't I fucking learn?

carmen_b
09-01-2010, 08:43 PM
Hot4 :
How about a solo vacation ? You may see that you miss him......

velvet
09-01-2010, 08:47 PM
My confession today:

I don't know how to multi-quote.

Aaaaah!! I know! Don't judge meeeee!!! :D

see the tab that says m-quote? just press that on each post you want to quote. at the end hit post reply and all of the posts you hit m-quote on will come up.

hot4ablackchick
09-01-2010, 09:10 PM
Hot4 :
How about a solo vacation ? You may see that you miss him......

Nah. I'm sure I would miss him, but I don't have the time or money for any sort of vacation. I wouldn't want to go on a vacation without him. Shit, I would really do some serious cheatin on a solo vacation. :( I am terrible

jennsweet
09-02-2010, 06:13 AM
Nah. I'm sure I would miss him, but I don't have the time or money for any sort of vacation. I wouldn't want to go on a vacation without him. Shit, I would really do some serious cheatin on a solo vacation. :( I am terrible

how would you feel if you caught him cheating on you?

pixierocksonthepole
09-02-2010, 06:52 AM
^^^That's ingenious lol I couldn't figure it out myself either.

hot4ablackchick
09-02-2010, 01:32 PM
how would you feel if you caught him cheating on you?

Terrible :( However, I don't think having sex with someone else is necessarily "cheating." He KNOWS he CAN have sex with other women. The thought of him being with someone else really turns me on, which is why I want an open marriage. But if he was sneaking around behind my back I would feel hurt. The fact that he isn't communicating with me would dissapoint me.

The thought of me with another man does NOT turn him on. He can't really stomach the idea of it. I've tried talking to him about it, but it doesn't do any good. It just makes him feel inadequate and jealous. I understand his pov, but he sure doesn't mind the idea of getting some on the side for himself. He doesn't mind participating in 'dirty' lapdances, even though he would be upset if I gave a lapdance like that. Yes, I am hypocrite and wrong.

I know this isn't the right thing to do, but he just blows it off if I talk to him about it. I really don't think monogomy is for me. But I do think its wrong for me to be dishonest and sneak around.

Honesty just doesn't feel like an option right now.

malayataylor
09-02-2010, 01:36 PM
.................................................. ..............*sigh*

_Avery_
09-02-2010, 02:41 PM
Deleted.

Harleigh HellKat
09-02-2010, 04:27 PM
definitely talk to a professional! i am seeking help for similar problems... paranoia, anxiety, depression, and mood swings. i am tired of these issues holding me back.

_Avery_
09-02-2010, 05:09 PM
Delete.

Pure
09-02-2010, 07:17 PM
^^^ hugs

charlie61
09-02-2010, 07:54 PM
definitely talk to a professional! i am seeking help for similar problems... paranoia, anxiety, depression, and mood swings. i am tired of these issues holding me back.

Girl, I don't know what you're talking about. All of those so-called 'symptoms' are standard stuff for a Recession Stripper.

Kellydancer
09-02-2010, 09:39 PM
definitely talk to a professional! i am seeking help for similar problems... paranoia, anxiety, depression, and mood swings. i am tired of these issues holding me back.

I can relate. I don't have the paranoia but have developed bad depression and a little bit of anxiety. My life is a mess between having a hard time finding a non adult entertainment job, the guy I love being a jerk (I gave him an ultimatum so we'll see how that works) and now my aunt just died (she just became my aunt because she had been my uncle's long time live in girlfriend and her last request was to marry him). On top of that the last few days have been gloomy from rain and these days make me very tired and even more sad.

pixierocksonthepole
09-03-2010, 07:48 AM
Last night all hell broke loose between my mom and the sperm donor. not dad but maybe just Father is better. He didn't raise me. But anyways they spent a good hour screaming at each other over the phone since he lives outta state. and not once did they stop to ask me how i wanted to deal with the situation. it was about me. and it hurts a lot. i just wish they would have listened to me. they do this and it makes me feel like a child again.

_Avery_
09-03-2010, 10:24 AM
Delete.

Jessie_tinydancer
09-03-2010, 12:19 PM
drunk and high... asking myself why I did it. Disappointed and dreading how this is going to feel tomorrow.

Sia
09-03-2010, 12:40 PM
I'm kind of freaking out right now. I'm supposed to be starting school next week to finish my undergrad in Biology. But I don't want to. I feel like I'm doing it partly to justify dancing.....like, "well, I'm dancing to put myself through school." I thought that I wanted to get my Masters after, but I can't picture myself in the academic world anymore.....sitting in a lab all day long. Plus, so many people get grad degrees and still can't find good work in their field.

At the same time, I don't want to keep dancing forever. I'm about to turn 30 and while I still look very young, there are only so many good dancing years left in me. I guess I could take dancing seriously for a year, actually make good money then see how I feel about things.

Sigh, why is life so tricky sometimes?

Harleigh HellKat
09-03-2010, 12:41 PM
writing this may make me a little vulnerable, but whatever... I'm going to the behavioral services place today. I'm through the worst of my depression, but I have anxiety attacks every day still. This is a big thing for me and I feel that my mental health has always held me back and I'm tired of it. I want to move forward and it took hitting rock bottom (if you guys only knew the story...) to realize that I needed help.

Avery... I think the health dept offers free help for stuff like this. I'm going to a place that's associated with them.

_Avery_
09-03-2010, 01:00 PM
Delete.

_Avery_
09-03-2010, 01:03 PM
Delete.

Glamgirl
09-04-2010, 08:23 AM
So i feel likea bitch again! Why is it if i like a guy and as soon as hes into me it puts me off? Like if a guy txts and gets keen on me i tend to get annoyed by them! It is not fair!!!

carmen_b
09-04-2010, 08:33 AM
^ Give them a chance at least! ;)

Glamgirl
09-04-2010, 08:38 AM
I know! Its funny cos this guy i found really sweet and cute(totally not my usual, hes short and chubby and he doesnt drive lol) but now hes txting all the time its like im not as interested! It is like i enjoy the thrill and chase :(

charlie61
09-04-2010, 08:58 AM
So i feel likea bitch again! Why is it if i like a guy and as soon as hes into me it puts me off? Like if a guy txts and gets keen on me i tend to get annoyed by them! It is not fair!!!

This used to happen to me all of the time until I started dating older men.

_Avery_
09-04-2010, 10:48 AM
I confess:
I had a dream about temptess and malaya!
Malaya wanted me to wear some jeans, but they wouldn't fit me, so temptess made me jump out the window. Then some dogs were chasing us....it was weird....
Sorry, nothing dirty (dammit), but was just weird...lol

malayataylor
09-04-2010, 10:58 AM
i confess:
I had a dream about temptess and malaya!
Malaya wanted me to wear some jeans, but they wouldn't fit me, so temptess made me jump out the window. Then some dogs were chasing us....it was weird....
Sorry, nothing dirty (dammit), but was just weird...lol

:rotfl: :)

Pure
09-04-2010, 06:25 PM
I feel guilty.... Im so tired and I have been letting spongebob, Olivia, Dora and the berenstain bears entertain my child for the majority of the day.

_Avery_
09-05-2010, 01:18 AM
I confess:
tonight was slow, but I did okay.
EVEN THOUGH.......DRAMA!!!
I know I'm not personally involved, but I'm so sick of hearing bitches bitch about stupid petty shit in the back. Bitching about money getting stolen...LOCK YOUR SHIT UP!!............then bitching about other stupid shit......and maybe I'm just paranoid, but it always feels like they're bitching when I'm in the back and it's funny at first, then it just gets fucking annoying. I'll fix my hair/makeup and get my ass on the floor because I seriously can't take it anymore!

I keep to myself, will keep my mouth shut because I'm the "new girl", but I think I'm gonna explode soon!!! FUCKING DRAMA!!!!!!

Tasha_xoxo
09-05-2010, 02:47 AM
im really fed up with my friend talkin bout killing herself,,
or about how she loves someone who makes her feel like shit.
idk about yall but would yall love someone who make you feel so terrible that youd wanna kill yourself?

i just cant stand when people are like that.
then she complains about how she hates when people step all over her.
there only stepin all over you because you let them,,thats her problem,,shes too damn nice,,and i cant stand that!

i just wanna back slap her or something like wtf,,come on what is she thinkin.

>:(

charlie61
09-05-2010, 09:06 AM
I confess:
tonight was slow, but I did okay.
EVEN THOUGH.......DRAMA!!!
I know I'm not personally involved, but I'm so sick of hearing bitches bitch about stupid petty shit in the back. Bitching about money getting stolen...LOCK YOUR SHIT UP!!............then bitching about other stupid shit......and maybe I'm just paranoid, but it always feels like they're bitching when I'm in the back and it's funny at first, then it just gets fucking annoying. I'll fix my hair/makeup and get my ass on the floor because I seriously can't take it anymore!

I keep to myself, will keep my mouth shut because I'm the "new girl", but I think I'm gonna explode soon!!! FUCKING DRAMA!!!!!!

I like drama because...more money for me!!

J.D.
09-06-2010, 09:33 AM
3 guys in 3 days.... It was a productive weekend! Especially the one last night, he was a one night stand from 6 years ago that I always remembered, I looked him up on facebook and sent him a message, he still remembered me too.... I feel like a guy trapped in a girl's body!

_Avery_
09-06-2010, 02:11 PM
Delete.

hot4ablackchick
09-06-2010, 08:47 PM
3 guys in 3 days.... It was a productive weekend! Especially the one last night, he was a one night stand from 6 years ago that I always remembered, I looked him up on facebook and sent him a message, he still remembered me too.... I feel like a guy trapped in a girl's body!

Mmmmmmm......How was it?

J.D.
09-06-2010, 09:18 PM
Mmmmmmm......How was it?

Does this answer your question? His dick was almost too big, too long and too thick, but I had fun :) I hadn't seen him in six years, and he just rolled up to my place and picked me up like it was nothing! He is very successful now though, so I am kind of intimidated to call him again.....

J.D.
09-06-2010, 09:22 PM
Mmmmmmm......How was it?

The other one, the first one on Friday, has a HUGE dick also, but isn't very passionate and can't last AT ALL!!! But he's the one I'm sprung on for some reason, so he left town and I hooked up with the other two to try to get my mind off the Guy A. The second one was okay, his dick was kind of small but he did know how to use it, and really appreciated me sexually. He had a vibrator next to his bed too, so we got kind of crazy. If only I could add on the dick of the last guy, the one I posted pics of, onto the second guy, that would be perfect!

Tasha_xoxo
09-06-2010, 09:25 PM
Does this answer your question? His dick was almost too big, too long and too thick, but I had fun :) I hadn't seen him in six years, and he just rolled up to my place and picked me up like it was nothing! He is very successful now though, so I am kind of intimidated to call him again.....

um yummy!

Jessie_tinydancer
09-06-2010, 09:35 PM
Does this answer your question? His dick was almost too big, too long and too thick, but I had fun :) I hadn't seen him in six years, and he just rolled up to my place and picked me up like it was nothing! He is very successful now though, so I am kind of intimidated to call him again.....

Oh god... intimidated? I'd have that on speed dial. Addiction potential for sure! Nice work!