View Full Version : Confessions Thread!
Genoveve
12-21-2016, 10:07 PM
^^^I have a section in my closet that is specifically for things that I don't want to throw away for sentimental reasons yet don't want to wear.
seashell
12-22-2016, 01:17 PM
I don't know what to do about my visa in Czech Republic. They need a bank statement stating that you have at least $4600, and I definitely don't have that. I *almost* did, a month ago, and I had intended to cam while I was here... but I was way too busy with class, and my bank account has been slowly depleting thanks to student loan payments and such. Ugh... :\
Looks like I'm going to have to leave the country once my 90 day tourist visa is up. But that's alright... I have a plane ticket to England, so I think I'm going to bide my time there, save up some money, and most likely come back to Prague.
victoriavein
12-24-2016, 09:04 AM
I confess that lately I kinda miss stripping, but I know the S.O would flip out if I ever tried to go back to it. the clubs are too raunchy now. it's just full of prostitution and drugs. I'm reliving it through the book I'm writing but damn I miss the stage! maybe I can get him to take me to the club for my birthday or something at least.
SimoneGray
12-24-2016, 02:27 PM
3rd Christmas completely on my own and somehow I'm super happy about it. Maybe I'm just meant to be that loner who has no one but is content...I mean it feels like a legit life path of late.
ScarletKitten
12-24-2016, 03:31 PM
I think stripping has turned me into somewhat of a gold digger. I don't have the time or patience for cheap or poor men. And I'll be damned if I ever have to support a man ever again. So yeah, go ahead and judge me. No fucks left to give over here. }:D
seashell
12-24-2016, 04:21 PM
3rd Christmas completely on my own and somehow I'm super happy about it. Maybe I'm just meant to be that loner who has no one but is content...I mean it feels like a legit life path of late.
I feel the same way. I'm not with my family, and even though some friends invited me out, I didn't go because I'm feeling sick. But I'm totally okay with it. It's like no other people=no stress. Kind of amazing. :D
I mean, I need to socialize in a few days before I go 100% hermit, but still. It's nice to have zero pressure on the holidays.
ScarletKitten
12-24-2016, 10:42 PM
Wow, I feel like a total bitch now, breaking up with him on Christmas Eve. :/
xStacey
12-25-2016, 04:50 AM
Wow, I feel like a total bitch now, breaking up with him on Christmas Eve. :/
I just did the same.
xStacey
12-25-2016, 04:51 AM
I feel very lonely and sad today.
whirlerz
12-25-2016, 11:04 AM
I feel very lonely and sad today.
I'm so sorry!
I'm here if uwanna talk
Sometimes I log in& out, just so u know!
baer45
12-25-2016, 07:16 PM
It's a late confession. I had a huge crush on George Michael. His voice is the most beautiful voice in pop music. Now he's dead...
Aurora_Sunset
12-26-2016, 02:09 PM
I made the effort to see my extend family for Christmas, which I haven't done for any holiday in 2 years, and when I was there, I was a total loner and didn't even really try to socialize with them... I just didn't feel like it. I was tired from work and the drive. My sister and the one cousin I'm kinda close with weren't there this year. And most of my other cousins have kids - some of them teenagers at this point - and the majority of their kids are just shitty little punks. I got sick of them running around and shooting off their mouths, and didn't feel like socializing with the dumbasses that raised them.
I've always been at a weird age in my extended family where there's the group of older cousins + sister that all bonded, and then my younger cousins that are still in undergrad and have all bonded... and then there's me. I'm not actually close in age with anyone, so it's always been hard for me to find the right group to bond with. I could have tried to just join in on everyone's activities this year since we've all finally hit an age where we can all pretty much converse as adults, but it's been so long, their kids were pissing me off, I'm the weirdo that doesn't live nearby or keep up with anyone's life anymore, and I just didn't want to... To be fair, no one called me over to the kitchen table or asked me to do anything or tried to socialize with me either. So I just sat in the living room anti-socially watching Christmas movies and playing on my phone until I was the first one to go to bed because I was exhausted.
Kind of a waste of a Christmas.
BarbieNYC
12-26-2016, 07:51 PM
^^^had the same thing happen to me this Christmas. My cousins are all significantly older and have kids. I just hung out with the elders. The 90 year old grandmother of my cousin was so awesome and when she saw me joked that we had the same hair color. It was a riot hanging out with her.
Confession: I miss working holidays. I hate missing out on money.
Vyanka
12-26-2016, 09:18 PM
It's a late confession. I had a huge crush on George Michael. His voice is the most beautiful voice in pop music. Now he's dead...
He was so sexy! Loved him in "Father Figure".... (((swoon)))
ScarletKitten
12-27-2016, 04:24 AM
I don't feel bad about breaking up with him anymore. I know the timing was kinda shit, but I'm glad I did it. I'm happy to be single again.
I haven't worked in weeks, but I'm going to work Wednesday and Friday. I will report how the shifts go. I hope to make lots of $$$. I really need it.
Elektra Luxx
12-27-2016, 10:49 AM
I've entered a particularly bad period of self loathing. I'm talking with a guy who is extremely nice and I feel like I should just break it off now before I turn his life topsy-turvy. So I'm hating myself for my inability to have normal relationships. Every relationship I've been in has gone wrong. He's not just some random guy, he's my brother in law's cousin and he's very nice and I really like him. I want to see where it goes, but my past history of relationships tells me to just end it. I'm really happy when we talk deep down I know I'm not going to break it off. I'm the most f#$ked person I know.
lynn2009
12-27-2016, 10:56 AM
So I'm hating myself for my inability to have normal relationships. Every relationship I've been in has gone wrong.
Me too! I'm going to have faith in us this time !
malika29
12-27-2016, 11:09 AM
A little late on the christmas wagon but for the past few years i have spent christmas on my own due to the fact that i cant handle my sisters alcoholism and my mothers lectures, her pretending to be supportive and showing an interest in my life but really she doesnt. This year i would of had to put up with both of those plis the fact that i would have been given a big life lecture on what i should be doing as i have just been made redundant from my vanilla work and having to listen to how proud mum is of my sister. Cannot be dealing with it. Also grandma was staying and as much as i love her i do not have the paitence to be running round after her all day and listening to her incredibly narrow minded views. She has dementia so this is part to blame for the way she is.
xStacey
12-28-2016, 07:04 PM
I really need a couple of drinks.
baer45
12-29-2016, 12:23 AM
I am having trouble to sleep at night.
http://images.8tracks.com/cover/i/009/048/418/sleep-1089.jpg?rect=0,197,480,480&q=98&fm=jpg&fit=max
PrincessfromHell
12-29-2016, 01:39 AM
I will go parent's place this January for a whole week! I have been living all over the world for the past 9 years and I feel like such a stranger there now. I had always been that black ship, and exploring the world and living away just made it worse. I'd rather stay at home and cam like crazy but I have to do that. I don't even know what to talk about with people that still live there, my ex school mates and etc. I stopped telling them about my visits and don't meet with them. Plus listening to my Dad ranting about me and my yonger sis not being married and no kids...ah phhhlease, lord, have some mercy.
Hopefully I will be able to binge sleep but I cant even sleep at parent's place quite often.
Packing my yoga matt, mantras and kindle...
amberlly
12-29-2016, 03:49 AM
I hate the "what do you do?" Questions.
It's like go away and mind your own business.
persianprincess
12-29-2016, 11:21 AM
I am having trouble to sleep at night.
http://images.8tracks.com/cover/i/009/048/418/sleep-1089.jpg?rect=0,197,480,480&q=98&fm=jpg&fit=max
Try Melatonin pills?
BarbieNYC
12-29-2016, 12:24 PM
I just cut off the "best friend" I always complained about on here. And I felt bad while I was talking to her, but now I feel so relieved. I didn't realize how much she was affecting me. She didn't put up a fight and seemed to understand where I was coming from and is leaving the house now. I'm definitely gonna miss her, but I don't need that type of negativity in my life.
seashell
12-29-2016, 02:00 PM
I don't understand why every guy I date is so proper at first. They seem to have no personality, and then I waver over whether or not they're too boring for me/can handle my stripper past/etc. Most of the time, they've turned out to be pretty fun and interesting, but good god this current guy has me confused... :\
chanzep
12-29-2016, 07:49 PM
I have been thinking about going back to the club a lot lately. I have been working in retail and hate it, this city is horrible for dancing but I could always fly to the club I used to work. grr
LegoMoney
12-29-2016, 08:18 PM
I'm watching the movie "The Player's Club" on TV and although this movie is so cheesy I am thoroughly entertained. And I identify with the main character so much. Student-stripper just trying to get to the next level while not drowning in the crazy world that is stripping. I feel oddly refocused and it came at the right time.
ScarletKitten
12-29-2016, 09:32 PM
I'm going celibate.
carmen_b
12-30-2016, 04:54 AM
He is probably just being well behaved / not wanting to blow it if you are more conservative. Give some hints that it's ok to loosen up a little.
I don't understand why every guy I date is so proper at first. They seem to have no personality, and then I waver over whether or not they're too boring for me/can handle my stripper past/etc. Most of the time, they've turned out to be pretty fun and interesting, but good god this current guy has me confused... :\
We had a rabbit like you
12-30-2016, 08:40 AM
After my baby is born (anytime now dude!!) they are already up my ass about birth control but my body does not react well to hormonal BC and I don't want the iud cause I don't fancy plastic and copper in my body for years and I've heard horror stories.
This won't sit well w them but pull out has been working for my partner and i for 4-5 years now. I understand it gets a bad rap in general but for us it works super well without flooding my body with unnecessary shit that makes me gain weight and break out and puke and not be able to orgasm. Fuck that.
He can get his ball tubes tied though if he so wishes ::)
What do I call it, family planning?? Lol
ScarletKitten
12-30-2016, 08:56 AM
After my baby is born (anytime now dude!!) they are already up my ass about birth control but my body does not react well to hormonal BC and I don't want the iud cause I don't fancy plastic and copper in my body for years and I've heard horror stories.
This won't sit well w them but pull out has been working for my partner and i for 4-5 years now. I understand it gets a bad rap in general but for us it works super well without flooding my body with unnecessary shit that makes me gain weight and break out and puke and not be able to orgasm. Fuck that.
He can get his ball tubes tied though if he so wishes ::)
What do I call it, family planning?? Lol
Yes, make him get a vasectomy. Women have to go through enough as it is. Fuck birth control pills and fuck the IUD. Both of those fuck up women's bodies. No thank you.
One of the reasons I've decided to go celibate is because of my extreme fear of pregnancy.
Aurora_Sunset
12-30-2016, 03:13 PM
I don't know how to deal with my constantly changing mindset.... I don't know if it's normal. One minute, I'm in the middle of a situation or with a certain person and feeling totally happy with it, and then when I'm on my own, my mind wanders and starts picking apart the lifestyle/person I was just with and hardcore fantasizing about other lifestyles. Either one feels totally legit. I like where I am when I'm in the midst of it, and I know that, and try to tell myself that even when I'm sitting at home alone and thinking about other things.... but it's no use. I start imagining my life as being totally different and wanting different things, and then that's all I want, and that feels just as strong as it felt when I wanted something else.
I think I've always been this way and just never committed to anything enough to really realize it, because in the midst of indecisiveness and changing moods every few hours, I would just be stagnant. Now that I was like "I need to stop being wishy-washy and commit to things!" it's really tearing at me over whether or not I actually want to do what I'm doing in all aspects of my life, or not.... It's weird that my internal drive literally changes so strongly in mere hours. It seems not normal.
seashell
12-30-2016, 03:17 PM
He is probably just being well behaved / not wanting to blow it if you are more conservative. Give some hints that it's ok to loosen up a little.
Yeah, that's probably it... I can come off as a very conservative person at first, too.
We went out again tonight, and kissed for the first time. Still not sure what to feel about this one, lol... he's cute, but still very reserved after 3 dates. Interestingly, I heard the little Tinder sound going off on his phone... haha... I don't feel too bad about throwing him back in the pond, now. He'll be fine ;)
We had a rabbit like you
12-30-2016, 04:14 PM
Yes, make him get a vasectomy. Women have to go through enough as it is. Fuck birth control pills and fuck the IUD. Both of those fuck up women's bodies. No thank you.
One of the reasons I've decided to go celibate is because of my extreme fear of pregnancy.
Girl it's scary, and my body is great at it and I have easy pregnancies and births but I'm scared of giving birth again..that's my other confession! I just want to get it over with an not think of a human ripping it's way out of a tiny hole in my body
persianprincess
12-30-2016, 06:08 PM
Girl it's scary, and my body is great at it and I have easy pregnancies and births but I'm scared of giving birth again..that's my other confession! I just want to get it over with an not think of a human ripping it's way out of a tiny hole in my body
I have a similar fear ... really want kids but really not feeling the process, except the sex part lol
malika29
12-31-2016, 12:20 PM
I have a couple from today.
Me and the OH have been talking about babies and whilst I know he will make an amazing parent and I do really want children I am also really scared about what the future would bring and my life would change completely. And once the bell has been ring it cannot be in rung.
Second I foster cats for the local charity. Yesterday I was informed my last foster baby that I recommend three weeks ago died of FIP. I still have his brother here with me as he hasn't been eating properly or growing, he still looks like an eight week old kitten instead of the eleven week old kitten he actually is. Vet today said she was also really concerned that he may well develop FIP and considering the one that died was as fit and healthy as a kitten could be before yesterday (it developed within the hour!) I am really scared that this little pumpkin will also go the same way and knowing how painful it is as a condition my heart is already broken at the thought of loosing him. I know he is going to be a long term foster atm as I won't let him be rehomed until he is eating consistently as he should be part of me thinks he will be staying permanently already, I am secretly hoping he does.
Elektra Luxx
12-31-2016, 12:36 PM
I don't know how to deal with my constantly changing mindset.... I don't know if it's normal. One minute, I'm in the middle of a situation or with a certain person and feeling totally happy with it, and then when I'm on my own, my mind wanders and starts picking apart the lifestyle/person I was just with and hardcore fantasizing about other lifestyles. Either one feels totally legit. I like where I am when I'm in the midst of it, and I know that, and try to tell myself that even when I'm sitting at home alone and thinking about other things.... but it's no use. I start imagining my life as being totally different and wanting different things, and then that's all I want, and that feels just as strong as it felt when I wanted something else.
I think I've always been this way and just never committed to anything enough to really realize it, because in the midst of indecisiveness and changing moods every few hours, I would just be stagnant. Now that I was like "I need to stop being wishy-washy and commit to things!" it's really tearing at me over whether or not I actually want to do what I'm doing in all aspects of my life, or not.... It's weird that my internal drive literally changes so strongly in mere hours. It seems not normal.
Paralysis by Analysis. Lol
That's what my therapist calls it. I have a decision to make and commit to it, but I don't make a decision because I have commitment issues. So I don't make a choice and it weighs on me. I don't know how normal it is, but I know you are not alone. Even when I make decision I'm always second guessing myself. "Did I make the right choice?" You are allowed to second guess yourself in your mind, but stay committed to your choice. I am still learning to do that.
ScarletKitten
12-31-2016, 01:06 PM
^Girl, you're not the only one with commitment issues. I have a huge problem with commitment. That's why I'm a stripper. I like going in whenever I want. I don't like schedules or bosses. It's also why I'm not getting married or having kids either. lol. Free birds unite!
I never applied this to my decision making though. Interesting point you made there. It takes me forever to make a decision sometimes. Even when I'm going shopping for clothes, I have to really think about it before buying. "Will I actually wear this? Is it worth the price? Is it good quality? Does it flatter me? What if I buy it and then have buyer's remorse?" And then I repeat the same questions in my head over and over. Kinda insane, lol.
lilylilylily
12-31-2016, 02:50 PM
^Girl, you're not the only one with commitment issues. I have a huge problem with commitment. That's why I'm a stripper. I like going in whenever I want. I don't like schedules or bosses. It's also why I'm not getting married or having kids either. lol. Free birds unite!
I never applied this to my decision making though. Interesting point you made there. It takes me forever to make a decision sometimes. Even when I'm going shopping for clothes, I have to really think about it before buying. "Will I actually wear this? Is it worth the price? Is it good quality? Does it flatter me? What if I buy it and then have buyer's remorse?" And then I repeat the same questions in my head over and over. Kinda insane, lol.
I'm exactly like that. Can't commit or make a fast decision. That's why I'll never be able to even get a tattoo, even tho id like one. Don't understand how people can decide on what to get and where, and live with it forever.
Elektra Luxx
12-31-2016, 06:45 PM
I'm exactly like that. Can't commit or make a fast decision. That's why I'll never be able to even get a tattoo, even tho id like one. Don't understand how people can decide on what to get and where, and live with it forever.
Tattoos! Yes, I'm exactly like that. It blows my mind when someone gets a tattoo with their current SO and then they break up.
chanzep
12-31-2016, 09:06 PM
I'm watching the movie "The Player's Club" on TV and although this movie is so cheesy I am thoroughly entertained. And I identify with the main character so much. Student-stripper just trying to get to the next level while not drowning in the crazy world that is stripping. I feel oddly refocused and it came at the right time.
Ha I was watching it and was on here too, I remember watching it on vhs when it first came out and was obsessed with it, never thought I would end up dancing at the time.
chanzep
12-31-2016, 09:09 PM
working in retail makes me hate people far more than dancing, dancing made me felt like I understood people more, retail makes me think wtf is wrong with people!.
amberlly
01-01-2017, 05:29 AM
Somebody said something nasty to hurt my feelings deliberately. A certain person who has decided they are 'better' than me.
Normally I get angry. I stew and feel bitter. This time I just got even and it feels so much better.
My New Years Resolution is to stop being nice. It's all about me. My goals.
So the energy vampires can go suck on someone else. Not interested. I literally blank stare now when people ask me to do things I don't want. Or say "No".
That used to be like so difficult. So scary I'd just do it to please them. Not anymore. I'd rather get mad and get even. I'd rather say no.
If you don't respect me don't talk to me. I have just been on a deleting spree. It's great. Cheaper than therapy and so satisfying!!!
Aurora_Sunset
01-01-2017, 06:59 AM
Went to bed at 9:30 last night - zero fucks given lol
I told myself that if I naturally woke up close to midnight, I'd get up and celebrate a little, but I didn't wake up until my mom tried calling at 12:03 and at that point I was like fuck it, it's past midnight. Slept a nice 8 1/2 hours. I might have been willing to go to a real party, but when my only options ended up being either sitting in and drinking with just my bf or skyping with some friends on my couch, I decided sleep was better. No offense to any of those people, but I was dead tired and just sitting around low-key until midnight wasn't worth the energy.
miss.a.p1600
01-01-2017, 07:07 AM
Same.
I was scrambling last minute trying to find somewhere to go and maybe meet some eligible men but then it was raining and cold and I was just like fuck it. I'm going to do what i do every year - nothing.
Just another day.
So boring but I slept well and saved money
Glamourmilf
01-01-2017, 07:12 AM
Somebody said something nasty to hurt my feelings deliberately. A certain person who has decided they are 'better' than me.
Normally I get angry. I stew and feel bitter. This time I just got even and it feels so much better.
My New Years Resolution is to stop being nice. It's all about me. My goals.
So the energy vampires can go suck on someone else. Not interested. I literally blank stare now when people ask me to do things I don't want. Or say "No".
That used to be like so difficult. So scary I'd just do it to please them. Not anymore. I'd rather get mad and get even. I'd rather say no.
If you don't respect me don't talk to me. I have just been on a deleting spree. It's great. Cheaper than therapy and so satisfying!!!
Amen, Amberlily, Amen!
I recently started doing the 'blank stare' thing when someone asks me to do something I don't want to. OR when they tell me that something I want to do isn't possible.
The reaction and look on THEIR face = Priceless!
It's so funny, actually.
I'm quite amused by it.
To then watch them scramble for words, and explanations. Lol!
There are no words.
They are douche bags.
xStacey
01-01-2017, 12:36 PM
Aww I'm sad, I woke up this morning to this text from a regular I've known for 5 years, he still came to see me weekly or bi-weekly after all those years, until recently. It says : " Hey. Listen. I'm presently trying to build something serious with someone I care a great deal about. Please do not contact me anymore so this part of my life can be left behind me. Thank you. "
I'm happy for him, because some girls who have been in the business for the last 10 years told me he's a regular everywhere and of plenty of girls... He's a really nice guy, so I hope it'll work out for him, but it still makes me a little sad. The last time I saw him was a week and a half ago, and he hadn't told me about it.
persianprincess
01-01-2017, 01:20 PM
This is going to sound pretty trivial ... but ... I'm getting drunk and laid tonight.
Still remaining single all year. Unless a miracle comes along. But need to start the year off with a bang lol oh god, save my soul.
DonaDiabla
01-02-2017, 07:35 AM
Frankly, I have decided to keep a steady stream of men in my life this year. I need different men to soothe my mind and my wallet. Plus, I just enjoy the company of men :DLOL! Also, I would like to have a man to eat jerk ribs and coconut cornbread with.::)
Elektra Luxx
01-02-2017, 10:40 AM
This is going to sound pretty trivial ... but ... I'm getting drunk and laid tonight.
Still remaining single all year. Unless a miracle comes along. But need to start the year off with a bang lol oh god, save my soul.
So did you? Please post all the sordid details with pics and video so I can live vicariously through you. Lol. Jk.