View Full Version : Confessions Thread!
baer45
12-04-2017, 10:37 PM
My new iphone retrived my old text messages from six years ago. There were things that I said based on the situation back then...now they seems thoughtless. A few people that loved me, now all drifted away. Who would have thought that you can still feel the love between lines six years later but couldn't back then? My life could be different. it could be.
xStacey
12-04-2017, 11:16 PM
Sometimes (mostly during finals) I wonder why I decided to pursue college instead of making sex work a career. It’s stressful, I don’t make money while I’m studying but I’m racking up debts, it’s stressful not being able to work and thinking about all the money I’m missing out on during my prime time, and it’s stressful not exercising, eating or sleeping and then I stress out about losing my looks and my body then not being able to return to sex work because I was pursuing college. All that hard work and stress, while I could make as much if not more if I just decided to do sex work full-time and commit myself fully. I mean if I worked 4-5 days a week or 30-40 hours a week I would be making quite a lot of money without all the stress and with a better quality of life.
Sometimes I think it would be so much easier if I just decided to make sex work a career, have time to train 3-4 times a week, eat well, sleep well and invest in plastic surgery to make myself prettier and take it easy working 40 hours a week instead of trying to juggle school, work, personal life, gym....
xStacey
12-04-2017, 11:25 PM
Sometimes (mostly during finals) I wonder why I decided to pursue college instead of making sex work a career. It’s stressful, I don’t make money while I’m studying but I’m racking up debts, it’s stressful not being able to work and thinking about all the money I’m missing out on during my prime time, and it’s stressful not exercising, eating or sleeping and then I stress out about losing my looks and my body then not being able to return to sex work because I was pursuing college. All that hard work and stress, while I could make as much if not more if I just decided to do sex work full-time and commit myself fully. I mean if I worked 4-5 days a week or 30-40 hours a week I would be making quite a lot of money without all the stress and with a better quality of life.
Sometimes I think it would be so much easier if I just decided to make sex work a career, have time to train 3-4 times a week, eat well, sleep well and invest in plastic surgery to make myself prettier and take it easy working 40 hours a week instead of trying to juggle school, work, personal life, gym....
Then I remember the insecurity of being only a sex worker without education or a back-up plan, the limited career opportunities without a degree and the ceiling of sex work, the boredom after a whole summer doing only sex work, the depressive thoughts after a slow period, shifts where i make $0 and the fact that the industry is declining every year... But when I’ve been working so little and I’m always fully booked everytime I work, it’s easy to only remember the positives and say fuck the real world.
WendiStarr
12-05-2017, 10:20 AM
I'm getting scared that I'm still bleeding. I know I'm going to have to make a doctor appointment regardless because something's not right. Either my period is lingering around for whatever reason or something else. It's triggering me to think about my last miscarriage. I still bled off and on every month like a period, despite being pregnant due to a subchorionic hematoma. I had no idea that I was even pregnant until I went to the doctor and they did blood work and an ultrasound. I'm hoping that's not the case again. Please, please, please I hope whatever this is, that the bleeding stops. I'm scared that if it is that again that if I make it to 13 weeks only to miscarry again, I won't be able to cope with that a 2nd time. Then the other part of me is worried that what if I have cancer or something awful that's causing the prolonged bleeding.
whirlerz
12-05-2017, 12:57 PM
Hope you feel better soon, hon
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2017, 08:55 PM
I wish that client that I dominate financially would call me more often. He did say I could charge whatever I wanted next time he calls }:D
Selina M
12-06-2017, 11:36 PM
I feel kind of shitty saying this but here goes.
I signed up to 'adopt a senior' this year for Christmas. The website made it seem like it was 1 or 2 items that were things they really needed (clothing, blankets, etc.) and maybe some small stocking stuffers. I signed up for 2 people thinking it'd be fun and no big deal $$$-wise. I have a VERY strict Christmas budget this year because I want to pay my tuition cash next semester without dipping into my savings.... But this shouldn't have been a huge bite out of it, I thought.
They sent me the lists and this long email explaining the 'rules'. You're supposed to buy them 3 out of 5 items on their list, AND a $35 grocery gift card AND stamps AND they encourage stocking stuffer items. That kind of rubbed me the wrong way already, cause that's pushing $100 for each person and I barely even spend that on my mom and SO... they made it sound like the grocery cards and stamps would be given to them out of general public donations so I was surprised to see I was required to get those. Oh, and it was all due a week from when the list was sent to me.
Lady #1 was really nice and wrote "Thank you for the help, God bless" and only asked for things she really needed (towels, blankets, pajamas, sheets) and wasn't picky. She I will happily buy for.
Lady # 2 asked for sheets and a robe but was very picky about materials and sizes. Then her other 3 items were expensive kitchen items - a freaking Instant Pot? An air fryer? Those are like $120-$150 a piece and definitely 'luxuries'. She even scratched out the grocery store options and wrote in her 'preferred' store. No 'thank you' note. Nothing. I got a very 'gimme' vibe from her list.
I would have only committed to 1 person had I known it was so much stuff and in such a short time frame, and that they were able to ask for ridiculous luxury items. I tried to gently tell the person in charge that Lady #2 was a bit pricey and she just said "Pick 1 of her big items then".
This is not giving me the warm fuzzies like you'd expect donating to, it's making me feel like a stingy bitch. My friend is doing an entire family for less than what 1 person costs through this program. Sigh.
seashell
12-07-2017, 12:58 AM
I’m going to Budapest this weekend, for 3 days. I’m nervous to take the time off from camming, since I’m kinda broke, but it’s an affordable city and it’s gonna be my last trip with a friend who’s moving away. Super excited to explore a new place!!
miss.a.p1600
12-08-2017, 11:03 PM
Sometimes I wish I could fuck a dude. Then fuck his dad or fuck his son (legal age of course). Like fuck two members of the same family.
And I wish Stripper webs was live on the weekends.
miss.a.p1600
12-09-2017, 01:39 PM
I just want to say "fuck it" to all my adult obligations and lay in bed drinking wine and eating honey glazed croissants
LaurenAus
12-10-2017, 11:30 PM
I want someone to make it rain in my bedroom as I sit and do nothing.
LoveyDovey
12-11-2017, 03:53 PM
I want someone to make it rain in my bedroom as I sit and do nothing.
That would be nice!
xStacey
12-19-2017, 11:08 PM
I've always been a little insecure about my skills in bed because I was never really sexually active since I didn't have stable relationships or I would have one night stand and not repeat. Since I've been dancing and doing massages, the idea was always to sell a fantasy, which I did very well, but I was always afraid that in my personal life a guy would lose interest after sleeping with me because I wasn't good enough in bed or whatever. When guys complimented me I would think it's just because they're telling me what they think I wanna hear.
I was surprised my boyfriend is sooo good in bed since we became official before we slept together. He's a really sweet, romantic big nerd and he's so perfect I thought it must be because he has a small dick or is bad in bed but boy I was so wrong. When we slept together for the first time he asked me are you sure you're really 24 and he keeps telling me i'm advanced for my age. He's 31 and I later learned he only dated girls who are a couple of years older than him or more but never a younger girl so I was a bit insecure about my lack of experience but tonight we talked and he said he's really not saying that just to be nice. He's been with much more experienced women but he says i'm nastier than all of the women he's been with and he loves it, that I suck his cock like a queen and when I will reach the age of the women he's been with before I will give him heart attacks lol ! Well it's always nice to hear such nice compliments especially when we have our own insecurities... ! The sex worker part of me sometimes wonders why I'm not commercializing my skills and banking instead of being in a relationship...
There was a really popular high-end escort in my area whose friend with one of my personal friend and I was wondering how she could leave such a successful business to become a paralegal and be with her boyfriend who's not rich or that good-looking... Well I've never been in a healthy relationship with a man who's so perfect and in love with me, but it requires a lot of sacrifice and changes in my life, which is really difficult right now. Sometimes I wonder if they're worth it, I really loved the single life, but a part of my is scared I might regret it if I leave him and might not meet someone who compares to him and could make me feel this way. I'm staying with him and trying to make the relationship work, we'll see how it goes, if it ever becomes too much... Right now it's really intense and difficult because I'm really not to used being in a normal relationship.
WendiStarr
12-20-2017, 05:02 AM
If it were not for this stupid joint custody arrangement where I am basically sharing custody with ex's mom since ex doesn't give a damn about my daughter, I would just take my daughter, disappear to somewhere out of the country, and start over somewhere far away.
JGB2009
12-21-2017, 07:01 AM
I would have a sex drive if I actually had someone worth having a sex drive with!!!!!!
xStacey
12-24-2017, 04:23 AM
I don’t know what to do. I wasn’t looking and I found the perfect boyfriend, but I loved being single, the freedom and doing whatever I want whenever I want without a care about anybody. I have to take next Saturday off because we live 2:30-3 hr away from each other and leaving on the same day on the 31 will be too last minute and we were concerned about transport, but I cannot stop thinking about all the money I will be missing out on ... It was so much easier being single, whenever I had free time it was all spent working and making bank because I can’t work much during the semester. Civilians don’t understand how much money we’re missing out on taking one night off and one girl was like what leave such a perfect guy to work?! And couldn’t understand... I don’t know what to do, I’ll keep trying and see what happens but it’s hard juggling all this. I’m afraid if I leave him, when I stop doing sex work and have my career I’ll regret letting go such a great guy I’ve honestly never met anyone with such chemistry.... but it’s rough at the moment and I was perfectly fine being single, although it sometimes felt lonely, I lived well with my choices.
Elektra Luxx
12-24-2017, 06:33 AM
From your past posts I believe we think alike in a lot ways. So here goes my two cents, I loved being single because of the freedom and independence. I'm also deathly afraid of commitment. Also, I'm always thinking that when things are going great I get worried that it can't last or I don't deserve this so something bad is going to happen or I will sabotage this myself instead of waiting for the bad to happen. I tried to sabotage my current relationship, it didn't work.
I think you know what you want to do, just don't do it for the dumb reasons I gave.
Aurora_Sunset
12-24-2017, 08:12 AM
Bf wants to come into town and stay with me tonight. I didn't want to turn him down because he's been such not as asshat for like 2 months now that I didn't want to start a fight, but I honestly really didn't want to do this today. I've been saying for weeks that I wasn't leaving town until Christmas Day, and I feel like it's pretty obvious that if I wanted to spend Christmas Eve together, I would've suggested it long ago. I was there for 4 days last week and 2 days this week already, am going to spend all week Christmas with my family, and then come back to immediately spending an entire week with him, visiting friends. Like, why is this necessary? Can I maybe have some me time, for chrissakes?
Even when he was pushing for it over the phone last night, I kept suggesting that we meet someplace for lunch/dinner between us, and I feel like he deliberately acted obtuse about the fact that I clearly was not suggesting for him to come all the way up here and spend the entire day and night with me. Just, after all the time I've spent with him the last couple weeks, and then going into a full week of traveling together right after I get home from spending a whole week with family... I just wanted tonight to relax and have my own Christmas-y time to myself. But, of course, if I say that, I'm a bitch because I "never want to spend time with him" - which isn't true. I just don't think he needs to live up my ass 24/7. Especially when I made special Thanksgiving plans, that I normally don't make, just so he could celebrate with me and my family, and then... kinda sorta stay tf out of my way during Christmas...
I'm awful
ETA: He just called to say he had to cancel cuz he forgot he was pet-sitting for friends. Now I'm relieved.
Even more awful lol
WendiStarr
12-24-2017, 10:46 AM
I ate way too many sugar and gingerbread cookies and pizza.
xStacey
12-24-2017, 11:31 AM
From your past posts I believe we think alike in a lot ways. So here goes my two cents, I loved being single because of the freedom independence. I'm also deathly afraid of commitment. Also, I'm always thinking that when things are going great I get worried that it can't last or I don't deserve this so something bad is going to happen or I will sabotage this myself instead of waiting for the bad to happen. I tried to sabotage my current relationship, it didn't work.
I think you know what you want to do, just don't do it for the dumb reasons I gave.
You sound exactly like me and guessed all my thoughts, sigh...
miss.a.p1600
12-24-2017, 01:54 PM
I know EXACTLY what you mean x stacey.
I enjoy being single, making decisions without having to consult anyone, events workaround MY schedule, can do whatever I want to do when I want to do it.
I'm dealing with that now. And that's the downside of 'traditional' dating the average man doesn't spend money (or there is nothing in it for you financially) until you marry or even after divorce (with good attorneys).
They cannot (or just do not want to) grasp the concept that time is money ....... and with you I ain't makin a dime
Last summer I associated with this narcissist that tried to get me to spend ALL my time with him - for his benefit not giving a fuck about mine. He would get pissed if I told him I had to leave or could not talk to him because I had to work. Then he was like oh, really, how much money are you losing right now?
The old dude I have right now is much more patient and understanding but I still wish he would just offer me some cash.
Like unless you are going to help me so I wont have to work as hard, then I have to work hard and I don't have a whole lot of leisure time to spend with you.
But I know I wont get a relationship unless I spend time with the dude.
It's a catch 22. Cause last thing you want to do is ditch a guy you like then regret it later but at the same time you might regret not stacking papers/losing out on financial opportunities that could help advance you towards your goals and what if the timing/person isn't right yet.
Decisions, decisions.
Pretty much similar to where I'm at now.
carmen_b
12-24-2017, 02:09 PM
Tell him in advance your work schedule ( a couple weeks ahead ) and don't bend! Trust me on it !!
I don’t know what to do. I wasn’t looking and I found the perfect boyfriend, but I loved being single, the freedom and doing whatever I want whenever I want without a care about anybody. I have to take next Saturday off because we live 2:30-3 hr away from each other and leaving on the same day on the 31 will be too last minute and we were concerned about transport, but I cannot stop thinking about all the money I will be missing out on ... It was so much easier being single, whenever I had free time it was all spent working and making bank because I can’t work much during the semester. Civilians don’t understand how much money we’re missing out on taking one night off and one girl was like what leave such a perfect guy to work?! And couldn’t understand... I don’t know what to do, I’ll keep trying and see what happens but it’s hard juggling all this. I’m afraid if I leave him, when I stop doing sex work and have my career I’ll regret letting go such a great guy I’ve honestly never met anyone with such chemistry.... but it’s rough at the moment and I was perfectly fine being single, although it sometimes felt lonely, I lived well with my choices.
Elektra Luxx
12-24-2017, 02:10 PM
I feel like he deliberately acted obtuse about the fact that I clearly was not suggesting for him to come all the way up here and spend the entire day and night with me. Just, after all the time I've spent with him the last couple weeks,...
...But, of course, if I say that, I'm a bitch because I "never want to spend time with him" - which isn't true. I just don't think he needs to live up my ass 24/7...
...I'm awful
Me too.
Message to my bf: Look!, I ....... love you and I really like our time together, BUT!, you need to give me my fucking space because you make me feel like I'm being smothered! It's just something I need for myself.
My bf gets very frustrated with me.
xStacey
12-24-2017, 04:22 PM
Tell him in advance your work schedule ( a couple weeks ahead ) and don't bend! Trust me on it !!
Yeah that’s what I usually do and was supposed to work Friday and Saturday double this week-end but he said it’s better the 30 because we live far from each other and he was concerned about transport the 31... So I work on Friday but had to cancel Saturday to change it for only Thursday night instead of double. Saturday are usually so good so it’s breaking my heart ugh... Plus I’m losing one more day to work on my 100% essay on top of that Saturday and the 4 other days we spend together it will be fun but I won’t be working or doing school research... sigh.
It would have been easier if I had the mindset of a civilian looking for love and working 40 hrs a week but I’m not and am all about goals and money lol.
xStacey
12-24-2017, 06:31 PM
Fuck this is so stressful having a boyfriend. He knows about my past as a stripper and he thinks I stopped and am bartending at a strip club. But he keeps talking about visiting me and flirting with me then take me home. He's really cute lol he doesn't have much money and was like I'll give you huge tips to make your coworkers jealous but you will have to give it back to me... He's really sweet and romantic, so unlike my previous boyfriends he might actually pop up to surprise me in a shift I'm supposedly working and might find out I don't work there at all. He's long distance (3-hour away) so it's less stressful than if he were actually living in the same city, he studied here but moved to Ottawa for work. He doesn't know I did bodyrubs in the best and still do... Tonight I had to cancel on him for Christmas since we're spending so much time together for New Year and I'm not ready to meet his family yet because I'm still not sure at all about this relationship and have my 100% essay to work on. It was weird he was always online on Facebook but wasn't talking to me at all, usually he's always texting me (which also bothers me a lot) then he posted " What a shame... " and he usually never posts anything at all. I messaged him and he wasn't replying and I was so scared he found out my secret, but it turned out to be something about politics in his country and he did his Master's thesis on the issue. Ugh.... Having a boyfriend is not at all easy in this industry fuck. I never understood girls who wanted to maintain a relationship while doing this job, it's so complicated. My past relationships were fucked up so it didn't matter as much.
JGB2009
12-28-2017, 12:49 PM
I was emailing a nude pic to myself so I could download it on my computer......my heart started racing because I thought I sent it to my daughters dad. I would have soooooo died if that had happened.
Aurora_Sunset
12-29-2017, 07:47 PM
2017 has seemed like the year of shit for most people. I was hoping 2018 would feel different, but now I just feel like I haven't even hit my lowest point yet, and I have nothing to look forward to... New Years Eve is usually my favorite my holiday because I love the idea of new beginnings, but I just feel super down about this NYE.
Elle:)
12-29-2017, 10:08 PM
I have never danced nude before and tomorrow will be my first night. I am a little nervous.
whirlerz
12-29-2017, 11:38 PM
You'll be fine, good luck! :)
ScarletKitten
12-30-2017, 12:23 PM
I don't think I have it in me to work at the club ever again. I keep thinking I'll work one Saturday a month, but I don't think I can even do that. The thought makes me sick and like I want to run away and hide....
Time to start thinking of new ways to make supplemental income.
ScarletKitten
12-30-2017, 02:31 PM
I was supposed to start this very important task today but instead I got high. I thought that if I smoked a little weed before doing what I need to do that I would enjoy it more. But instead I just don't want to do it at all. I'm going to give myself maybe 1 hour to chill then I'll take care of business.
lilylilylily
12-30-2017, 03:50 PM
I don't think I have it in me to work at the club ever again. I keep thinking I'll work one Saturday a month, but I don't think I can even do that. The thought makes me sick and like I want to run away and hide....
Time to start thinking of new ways to make supplemental income.
I'm going through the exact same thing
seashell
12-30-2017, 05:13 PM
I don't think I have it in me to work at the club ever again. I keep thinking I'll work one Saturday a month, but I don't think I can even do that. The thought makes me sick and like I want to run away and hide....
Time to start thinking of new ways to make supplemental income.
Same! I keep wanting to go back for the money, but then I remember all the reasons I hate stripping. There is no shortage of reasons.
My confession is that, since my last relationship just ended and I'm spiraling into depression, I think I'm going to go back to the US and get a dog. I would get one here, but I don't think they'll let me adopt one, as a foreigner (plus, the language barrier & paperwork). I've been wanting a dog for sooo long, and now that I'm single, I can do what I want ;D
Elektra Luxx
01-03-2018, 08:09 PM
Over New Years Eve I found out second hand that my 18 cousin is having sex with a 50 year old guy for money. She has a job, but I know she needs money because she's kind of on her own. She lives with my grandma because her home life is in turmoil. Not because anything she did, her parents are just really bad parents. I'm worried for her, but I feel like I'm being a hypocrite. I was doing the same thing at her age. I'm not really close to her, so I'm not sure what to do.
aliwonderland
01-03-2018, 08:17 PM
I get miserable whenever I stay in the same place for more than 4 months. It sucks because I've always wanted to be able to put down roots and have better connections...
But whatever.
Today I put in notice for my vanilla job and started the search for a good volunteering gig somewhere warm and happy and tropical and cheap.
Tomorrow I hope to buy a plane ticket. (assuming I've figured out where I'm going)
Over New Years Eve I found out second hand that my 18 cousin is having sex with a 50 year old guy for money. She has a job, but I know she needs money because she's kind of on her own. She lives with my grandma because her home life is in turmoil. Not because anything she did, her parents are just really bad parents. I'm worried for her, but I feel like I'm being a hypocrite. I was doing the same thing at her age. I'm not really close to her, so I'm not sure what to do.
That's rough... does she know about your past? I don't know how close you all are, but maybe you could reach out to her to go out for coffee or lunch or something? Then gently give her some advice, or tell her she can talk to you without being judged, or even just remind her that you're there for her if she needs anything.
Elektra Luxx
01-03-2018, 09:34 PM
That's rough... does she know about your past? I don't know how close you all are, but maybe you could reach out to her to go out for coffee or lunch or something? Then gently give her some advice, or tell her she can talk to you without being judged, or even just remind her that you're there for her if she needs anything.
No, she doesn't know of my past. I like the lunch idea. And I don't have to just outright tell her I did that I escorted, but just be there if she needs to talk. I just remember that when I was 18, I was very naive and got used and was taken advantage. Some guys are predators.
Selina M
01-04-2018, 12:19 AM
I'm slowly whittling down the amount of 'stuff' in the house by cleaning & reorganizing each room... I keep getting tempted to just toss a lot of SO's stuff without saying a word.
Most of it is crap he hasn't touched literally since we moved into the place 3 years ago but if I ask him it'll be like "No don't throw that out! I'm totally gonna use it again". Honey... no, you're not. He would never miss 95% of it.
Elle:)
01-04-2018, 10:26 PM
I just want money. A lots of money.
LaurenAus
01-04-2018, 10:54 PM
I just want money. A lots of money.
You just read my mind...
BarbieNYC
01-05-2018, 08:59 AM
When I'm not dancing regularly I get so out of shape. Some might call me thick but I've crossed the line into fat territory because I'm starting to get a double chin which I have never had before O_O
It is seriously a scary thought because dancing kept me in check about my body. If certain outfits started fitting weird I would be mindful about my diet and the weight would go down.
I went back to work after 2 months off and only 2 outfits fit well! Thankfully I'll have about a month to work like everyday so I'm grateful for that. But It's a scary realization to have because there's gonna be a day when I don't dance anymore and I'll be wearing scrubs all the time and won't notice myself getting bigger.
And the only thing worse is feeling so sluggish and unhealthy. If I felt great and healthy at this weight, I wouldn't mind. But I definitely feel out of shape and wanna change that. I need to make a lifestyle change.
seashell
01-05-2018, 11:46 AM
I can't stand living with my ex-boyfriend. It's driving me insane. He never leaves. I'm trying so hard to convince myself that it's worth it to stay here until the new tenant arrives, and not just move out RIGHT NOW.
Only 10 more days.....
Also, I found out that it's super easy to adopt a dog in Croatia as a foreigner, and even get an EU pet passport. Yuhs! Croatia, it is. I had a fleeting desire to go back to the US, but honestly, I really need an affordable place to live right now... so my future will involve a $600/month apartment at the beach, and a teeny tiny dog. :D
chanzep
01-05-2018, 05:15 PM
I need to stop eating like its still holiday season.
SnuffleUffleGrass
01-05-2018, 05:53 PM
Weird confession...I've been doing something with The Law Of Attraction called "Idle wishing" & it works disturbingly well. I'll have to get on a computer later to post about it because the idea is best understood with more background information and examples.
Glamourmilf
01-06-2018, 06:36 AM
Weird confession...I've been doing something with The Law Of Attraction called "Idle wishing" & it works disturbingly well. I'll have to get on a computer later to post about it because the idea is best understood with more background information and examples.
I would absolutely LOVE to hear about it!
LOA has changed my life. But, I'm always wanting to up my game with it.
Waiting on you with bated breath.........:listen2:
A million thanks in advance.
aliwonderland
01-06-2018, 11:10 AM
Weird confession...I've been doing something with The Law Of Attraction called "Idle wishing" & it works disturbingly well. I'll have to get on a computer later to post about it because the idea is best understood with more background information and examples.
I wanna hear more about it, too!
SnuffleUffleGrass
01-06-2018, 06:27 PM
Regarding "Idle Wishing" & The Law Of Attraction....I know there are LOA exercises on focusing and meditation.
"Idle wishing" to me is keeping an emotional/behavioral wish in the back of your head and thinking about it when you have times of peace & quiet + when you are feeling mentally balanced. I think you can ruin the intention if you lump the wishes in with times you are feeling anxiety, stress or frustration.
The drawback is because you reserve your best times for Idle wishing, there is no set timetable for it to work. Lucky for me a particular wish became reality within in a few months because the framework was already there to make it happen.
And the second part of wishing for positive changes for yourself is working on becoming a better person so you essentially earn the things you are seeking by growing towards them.
A thought that has given me peace in the past couple years is "only I know what is going on in my head." When I'm feeling manic or emotional it helps me avoid getting carried away/doing stupid things.
& I did want to mention something I noticed over the past several years.....it's very easy to plant thoughts in your own mind. Your mind is like a garden & if you keep sticking the same "seeds" in there they will pop up eventually. I noticed sometimes all it takes for me to dream about a long forgotten person or place is having conscious thoughts about the person or place for seconds or even a literal minute. I would definitely recommend mental exercises to prevent triggering sights or sounds from having a "hangover" effect on your mind. Once you block certain things out the power these things have disappears.
Aurora_Sunset
01-06-2018, 09:22 PM
Sometimes I get freaked out about aging, but honestly, more than anything, I look forward to being older. Like, I'm totally convinced I'm gonna be a badass old lady. I'm done with youth and all the bullshit insecurity and uncertainty that comes with it. I can't wait to be on the other side of it, all wise and don't-give-a-fuck.
Ifyouseekamy
01-07-2018, 04:57 AM
Sometimes I get freaked out about aging, but honestly, more than anything, I look forward to being older. Like, I'm totally convinced I'm gonna be a badass old lady. I'm done with youth and all the bullshit insecurity and uncertainty that comes with it. I can't wait to be on the other side of it, all wise and don't-give-a-fuck.
I heard 40’s are the fuck it years. Bring it on. I want to be a hot mature dancer. I’ve spent a lot of money on health and beauty so...
Also, I know I Have a lot of time and talent that could be used to better humanity, but I just like grinding on cock and making money. Maybe I’m fucked up for making that my life’s ambition, but I spent my young adult life taking care of everyone else. I will not get married again, so I might as well spend what years I have left on having fun and making money. My family is so disappointed...lol.
Grace108
01-09-2018, 05:23 PM
Hello! Had a break from the site. Honestly I was shocked for the way I got fired ( because of Owner bad mood) with no reasons after 1,5 year. I needed time to digest. The good thing is that i explored different clubs ;-) which I didn’t before... at the moment I am in a club where the money are decent but the vibes the management, stage do not feel right... but I make some money so it’s worthy ... I am not sure if I will move or when.. Thinking about boobs btw ... and the idea of traveling around while dancing intrigued me a lot :-)
Can’t be bothered by Control freak managers anymore lol for what than?!
carmen_b
01-10-2018, 12:48 AM
I have done it ( thrown out / sold a few of his things on the sly). He probably won't notice at all. My BF didn't notice. He knows I'm a minimalist though and probably knew stuff would go moving in with me.
I'm slowly whittling down the amount of 'stuff' in the house by cleaning & reorganizing each room... I keep getting tempted to just toss a lot of SO's stuff without saying a word.
Most of it is crap he hasn't touched literally since we moved into the place 3 years ago but if I ask him it'll be like "No don't throw that out! I'm totally gonna use it again". Honey... no, you're not. He would never miss 95% of it.