View Full Version : Confessions Thread!
Aurora_Sunset
12-02-2019, 09:42 AM
I was really pumped to start being productive this week, and felt good about my goals. Now, I'm so stressed over ex-wife's manipulative, evil BS that I can't quell my anxiety. I feel like I've been trying to go 100 mph to try to improve our lives and keep up, and she just can't let us get on our feet without starting crap. I'm sick of being made to feel like we're irresponsible, selfish deadbeats just because we struggle more and have to assert boundaries, when we're the ones with multiple jobs, lower pay with higher expenses, and no days off. It feels like a hopeless hamster wheel, working so hard, just to be made to feel like a lazy piece of crap after we hand over all our money and have nothing to show for it ourselves.
I don't say this genuinely about other people often, but I hate her. I really do. She's human garbage. And I truly don't believe that she deserves her kids with all the shit she does to fuck up their lives for the sake of her selfish, childish, and short-sighed desires and decisions. I see the way she uses them for stirring up drama in her life to feel important, as a cash-grab, and as a means to be vindictive as though they're just pawns to her to shape her life to what she wants. I think she uses everyone that way. I honestly hope that by the time the kids are adults, they cut her out of their lives like the toxic, narcissistic POS she is. I won't feel bad if she dies bitter, alone, and penniless after her parents pass away and hopefully leave her absolutely nothing because they're getting sick of her crap as well.
Back to the first part of my post, I hate that I let such a low-life bully get under my skin so badly that it paralyzes me sometimes. I pump up my husband when she's making him cry with her nastiness, and remind him that 99% of what comes out of her mouth are baseless lies, but when it's just me sitting here, and I have no one to be strong for, I just want to cry too.
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 10:02 AM
^ I really feel for you in these posts. It is so obvious she is adding expenses just to be a cunt . Play Therapy ? wtf ?
Just put the kid in a sports team and hope for the best like the old days !
I wonder if mediation could help you guys ? Blah.
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 10:04 AM
So ...... there are two dicks I've been totally obsessed with the last month.
The aviator ( have not had it ) and Mr. NY ( the skinny guy with the monster c$^k ).
Anyway.... does it make me a bad person to try to get both as a December treat to myself ? Haha.
Not in a three way type of way ...... just to be clear. hahahah
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 10:12 AM
So ...... there are two dicks I've been totally obsessed with the last month.
The aviator ( have not had it ) and Mr. NY ( the skinny guy with the monster c$^k ).
Anyway.... does it make me a bad person to try to get both as a December treat to myself ? Haha.
Not in a three way type of way ...... just to be clear. hahahah
Hey a three way sounds hot IF all parties wanted it
but yeah sounds like a sexy December
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 10:23 AM
^ Yeah , I agree. It sounds really hot. ;)
WendiStarr
12-02-2019, 10:54 AM
If I wasn't pregnant I'd totally go find a man or woman's tongue to use. I'm pissed at baby's daddy and want some oral pleasure. I don't want to have to worry about some strange tongue possibly having herpes or something that could be passed on to the baby though.
KariSwitch
12-02-2019, 11:58 AM
Well, I wasn't crazy, she was def checking me out. Didn't see her again until yesterday at the gym. She was training someone, and I might have been watching her a little more than I should. Noticed she left her phone near one of the machines, so I just had to pick it up and give it to her. Ran into her as I was headed back to the locker room. She essentially said thanks, I wouldn't believe how many phones she lost/had broken at the gym, and said she owed me something. I was struggling like a deer in headlights, and mumbled something about liking coffee. Well she took that as me inviting her for coffee (there's a starbucks walking distance from gym), as in right there/right then. So she asked if i needed to get changed and said she was finishing up with a client, but would be ready to go in 20. Um, this girl got flustered... but pulled it together.
So coffee was great, sorted out that we both like girls, and talked for 45mins+. She had another client coming to the gym, so we had to walk back. She walked with me back to my car in the garage, exchanged numbers, and she asked/more kinda told me she was taking me out on a date this Sunday. Then there was a hug that lingered a few seconds longer than it should have, which led to a nice soft kiss. I'm actually excited for Sunday!!!!
Have to update this again. Best. First. Date. EVER!!! We ended up just making out for an hour in my car at the end of the date. I'm crushing harder than a high-school girl... I even invited her to Thanksgiving dinner with my family. It typically takes a lot for me to do that, in fact its been over 5 yrs since anyone I was dating made it to a family holiday with me. My dad had to blurt that one out too. That scored major brownie points though... I'm head over heels for this girl. And I don't fall like this for anyone. I'm so excited and scared bit.
carmen_b
12-02-2019, 12:05 PM
Whoa !! Hot. ^^^
Thats awesome!
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 12:29 PM
My fin domme client called in FINALLY
He should have spent more money though
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 12:33 PM
The weirdest thing I realized is that that new guy looks and acts similar to the former coworker that married one that i got head from that one time.
I kept fantasizing about him, using him for solo masturbation fantasy material, wishing I would have fucked him.
Well since he was married I didn’t feel like doing all that but I did end up running into this new guy who has a similar style and demeanor
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 12:34 PM
I need to be working right now.
I’m hungry and tired though
miss.a.p1600
12-02-2019, 09:05 PM
I’ll never forget the first time I had a guy suck my toes.
Cotdamn that felt so good.
I think I’ve only had one guy do it.
Need more toe suckers
miss.a.p1600
12-04-2019, 10:11 PM
That guy was supposed to call me tonight and he did but I couldn’t talk at the time he usually calls me cause I was grocery shopping and with family. So I text him I’d call him back.
When I called him back he didn’t answer. This is the first time he’s not answered or called me right back.
miss.a.p1600
12-04-2019, 10:28 PM
I keep going back and forth on whether I’m interested in this guy or not.
He impressed me so much during the first two weeks and now I’m still wanting him to show me something more. I want evidence hard proof (pun intended) that he is interested only in me. I want to have sex with him but only if he expresses his desire for me.
I need to complete the mission.
Aurora_Sunset
12-05-2019, 09:46 AM
I keep thinking about the one winter years ago, where I was hella depressed. I didn't work unless absolutely necessary (I had just started escorting and only had one other very part-time job), and at one point, didn't leave my apartment for a week until I ran out of cat food. It was a shitty apartment, always cold, barely had any furniture, and I existed off unhealthy amounts of alcohol and delivery food. I would take a nap after showering or washing 2 dishes because anything wiped me out. All I did was lie around all day, drink, and binge-watch TV on my laptop.
I know I would never like to be that depressed again, but a part of me... wishes I could have a few months like that again... I guess I don't so much miss the depression, but I miss the ability to check out like that and just take care of myself. The few bills I had still got paid on time, and I had very few outside responsibilities. Right now, I wish I had the ability to shut out the world and self-care like that again.
Aurora_Sunset
12-05-2019, 01:06 PM
I regret dropping out of the paramedic pre-req course I was in last summer. At the time, it seemed like the best idea because I was not in a good place mentally to focus on it, and wasn't doing as well as I wanted to in it. But if I had just powered through, I would have found a way to pay for the program in the fall, and I'd be done with it now. A lot of other things would have had to change or be different, but I'd definitely be in a better position to find a higher-paying, stable job right now.
I still want to go through the program and obtain that level of certification. But it feels like it keeps getting further and further away with other responsibilities piling up. A classic case of not using my youth, time, and freedom to my advantage... thinking I had all the time in the world and then realizing that's not true...
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 10:22 AM
This random guy walks into Starbucks, smiles at me, looks for a table next to me (they’re all full) then sits directly in my line of eyesight.
I’d rate him about a 7.2 in looks. He has nice hands that I can imagine caressing my body ... mmmmm
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 07:26 PM
Okay so I’m in process of pulling back from this guy.
I wish it didn’t have to be like this. But he leaves me no choice. Plus the way I was thinking about him all the time was not healthy at all.
Step #1 delete his number
Step #2
What else should I do to pull back
miss.a.p1600
12-06-2019, 08:25 PM
I should have pulled back 2 weeks ago after he told me he just got out of a relationship but I gave it the benefit of the doubt because he kept texting n calling me and giving me attention
It’s probably for the best. Deep down his confession (only after I was wise enough to ask) had me feeling like I was an option and I didn’t feel like I could trust him
I’m too grown to be getting emotionally invested in a dude only to have some Bertha bitch lurking and his ass can’t make up his damn mind.
I’m just glad I didn’t lose my damn mind and fuck him even though I really wanted to cause I’d probably be drunk crying in the shower rn. I guess him not responding to my text is the out I need to just disappear
As much as I wanted to keep things going I need to focus on myself and my career.
Goodbye for now dude!
Now off to rant in exes thread
Ifyouseekamy
12-07-2019, 06:12 AM
I should have pulled back 2 weeks ago after he told me he just got out of a relationship but I gave it the benefit of the doubt because he kept texting n calling me and giving me attention
It’s probably for the best. Deep down his confession (only after I was wise enough to ask) had me feeling like I was an option and I didn’t feel like I could trust him
I’m too grown to be getting emotionally invested in a dude only to have some Bertha bitch lurking and his ass can’t make up his damn mind.
I’m just glad I didn’t lose my damn mind and fuck him even though I really wanted to cause I’d probably be drunk crying in the shower rn. I guess him not responding to my text is the out I need to just disappear
As much as I wanted to keep things going I need to focus on myself and my career.
Goodbye for now dude!
Now off to rant in exes thread
I feel this a thousand times. I’m so at peace on my own. It’d be nice to have a partner, but i don’t NEED a man. I don’t need ANYBODY especially a lame as dude that doesn’t know my worth. Just focus on making that money.
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 08:45 AM
^sadly we do need them IF we want babies n marriage
But yeah I get what you’re saying like it’s nice to have that (if that’s what a lady wants) but not coming from a place of desperation is that what you mean?
Dick is distracting me....and I ain’t even had the dick yet....I need therapy lol. Maybe I am feeling too needy.
Thanks to you ladies for not reporting me for posting like a maniac on here about this guy
trustfundkiller
12-07-2019, 10:06 AM
I got out of the trip with my sugar daddy that I was dreading. I'd say he covers about 60% of my bills. I basically told him I was over my head with everything and now is not a good time for me to be doing anything, let alone going on vacation. He actually took it a lot better than I anticipated. I thought he was going to be furious and break everything off, but he was actually understanding about it. Whew. I can't begin to describe the relief I feel.
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 10:48 AM
I’m in a ski town with a sore pussy from too much attention.
Can I just put a little snow ball on it ? Would it help ? Haha
Drinking sooooo much water for UTI prevention.
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 11:30 AM
So it felt good to break the pattern and not reply to that guy even though I wanted to.
He text me at 945p and said wyd?
Those 3 letters are triggering because that’s what my former coworker who i had a crush on (who turned out to be a fuckboi) would text me. Like just no effort boring af.
And so I’m slowly just realizing as much as I’d like to keep him around and I’d like to believe my conversation is so stimulating that he must call me everyday..... I risk playing with Fire and being friend zoned by him or having him try to use me for free attention or as a backup plan till he figures out what he wants.
I waited till this afternoon to text him back. Text him that I was not feeling good (which was true) and went to sleep early (a slight twist of the truth)
I don’t care what he thinks of me anymore. I don’t care if he text me back. Because I’m tired of feeling emotional over a guy who’s emotionally unavailable and being in this state of confusion.
I’m okay with pulling back for now. It’s the best way to relieves the pressure of what I’m feeling.
I would like to tell him this but I don’t know if he can handle the truth or if this is better left unsaid
JGB2009
12-07-2019, 11:57 AM
So it felt good to break the pattern and not reply to that guy even though I wanted to.
He text me at 945p and said wyd?
Those 3 letters are triggering because that’s what my former coworker who i had a crush on (who turned out to be a fuckboi) would text me. Like just no effort boring af.
And so I’m slowly just realizing as much as I’d like to keep him around and I’d like to believe my conversation is so stimulating that he must call me everyday..... I risk playing with Fire and being friend zoned by him or having him try to use me for free attention or as a backup plan till he figures out what he wants.
I waited till this afternoon to text him back. Text him that I was not feeling good (which was true) and went to sleep early (a slight twist of the truth)
I don’t care what he thinks of me anymore. I don’t care if he text me back. Because I’m tired of feeling emotional over a guy who’s emotionally unavailable and being in this state of confusion.
I’m okay with pulling back for now. It’s the best way to relieves the pressure of what I’m feeling.
I would like to tell him this but I don’t know if he can handle the truth or if this is better left unsaid
Usually if I tell someone something it never solves anything. So I tell myself what is even the point. Its almost like it is better left unsaid.
whirlerz
12-07-2019, 12:57 PM
So.
This morning, after running out for a muffin, & getting lunch to take home, landlords daughter came by to collect rent, which I gave her, & asked how he's doing.. She said he's at the Dr., which when I last saw him he was very shaky all over, so possibly Parkinson's?
About an hour later, I get a hard knock, "Sheriff". So, I thought one of roomz playing a joke..
Then I was scared to open, cause my room's a cluster fuck.. Curiosity got me, I go out in hall to see sheriff, several responders..
The lady who lives here w/her bf (drinkers) was found on floor of her room, the guy called. He did not know how long she been on the floor. :O
There was a stroke unit huge bus thing out front, 2 fire trucks, sheriff, etc.
So, I was gonna try & visit her at hospital, I asked her bf, he said he talked to a couple nurses, they won't tell him much (since he's not fam). He let her cousin know, she has 5 grown kids.
But, she is now in ICU, so Idk.
She has jaundice, extended belly (not preg.).
We had been trying to get her to go to Dr for weeks since she'd been vomiting for that amount of time.
Needless to say, very anxious rn.
Update : just found out she has a brain tumor, they are trying to get ahold of her family
Thanks for reading.
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 01:47 PM
Good. He got up and had to go work immediately. I was worried about my pussy lol .
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 01:58 PM
Usually if I tell someone something it never solves anything. So I tell myself what is even the point. Its almost like it is better left unsaid.
Good point!!!
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 02:34 PM
Okay so I知 in process of pulling back from this guy.
I wish it didn稚 have to be like this. But he leaves me no choice. Plus the way I was thinking about him all the time was not healthy at all.
Step #1 delete his number
Step #2
What else should I do to pull back
Step #2 next time he calls me; I will end conversation 75% of the time and no calls over 30 min (which I値l gradually decrease to 15 min)
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 02:35 PM
^ Give him 10 min. max on phone !
Then segway into an in person suggestion in 1-2 days!
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 02:40 PM
My little experiment being a kept woman is going quite nicely. :)
Been talking baths in a huge tub with outside facing windows.
Working on day job stuff as I get to it ....
He is out buying me some clothes lol .... I had to block off 2-7p.m. today for my job and can't spare any time then.
He gave me the car to finish my work at a coffee house since I hate being home all day ( even in a very nice home ).
I was so bored 5 -6 days ago and I am now spoiled and filled to brim with dick lol.
Life has made a drastic improvement.
lynn2009
12-07-2019, 03:26 PM
I think I just did the worst thing in my life. Derek's brother texted me Wednesday or Thursday afternoon asking to talk on the phone that night & I ignored him because i had already talked to his wife and mother about the medium reading and their entitlement to my hour was really starting to piss me off. Then his SIL called me Friday morning and kept texting me all day. I know she was just wanting to be a good wife but them being all over me was really starting to piss me off because I don't owe them anything. By Friday afternoon I asked her to leave me alone and I would try to call over the weekend. Ok well his dad now just texted me and I'm fed up and texted the SIL about all the mean and horrible things Derek had said about his family, that his brother was just obsessed with money and elitist and his parents were so caught up with starting the company when he was little they were emotionally neglectful and abusive parents.
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 03:29 PM
^ Give him 10 min. max on phone !
Then segway into an in person suggestion in 1-2 days!
My dumb ass had been talking to him for like almost an hour a night each night then it suddenly dawned on me that like hey wtf would he invest trying to get to know me when I’ve given him so much time already ... for free
i swear if men can’t use you for your pussy they will try to take other things like your time, etc
This is what I noticed with that coworker I had a crush on. But it wasn’t until I left the job that I noticed he had reeled me in for MONTHS. Just wasting all of my time and mental energy.
At least I can say I noticed this sooner
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 04:07 PM
^ If you are really digging him just say you are interested in another date and then transitioning to his girlfriend ....... just see what he does.
Nothing to lose offering up the situation you'd *like* right ? He seems a little lost / unfocused on what to do.
If he gave you that gf link wouldn't you be down to bang ? Lol
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 04:22 PM
^thanks so much Carmen
Great suggestions
I would be able to relax *slightly* more knowing he is emotionally available
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 04:30 PM
My new dude M ( like the 3rd day we knew each other ) was just like " I'm really simple. Fuck me good and be faithful and I'm yours. "
I really liked the clarity he gave . I just have to kind of take his word and roll with that. He doesn't really have any sort of incentive to lie or fake his intentions.
I liked is his profile info he mentioned wanting to " lead to LTR " and then before we even met me he was asking qualifying questions like if I was fully single / that he was hoping to find one person to persue ect.
miss.a.p1600
12-07-2019, 04:40 PM
^its always nice when they make it easy for you to know their intentions vs concealing/being confused about/lying about their intentions
carmen_b
12-07-2019, 04:47 PM
^ I think I would have fucked him regardless which is why I don't really feel he had to lie haha
It's nice because it DOES help me relax and fully be myself around him .
Confession piece #2 ...... I still have that tendency to add up what I'm " missing " not being in the club. On this week though it's hard to do that math. I mean he has treated me so well ( basically offered a surprise vacation type of setting I would never have been able to pull off myself ). I'm kind of trading it for some experience ( at least that is what I'm telling myself ).
I do need to make a correction though and pick up more day job hours. I was intending to split my earnings 50/50 ish but it seems like I'll at the club less in December so I need to correct it / hustle day gig harder.
JGB2009
12-07-2019, 06:05 PM
So.
This morning, after running out for a muffin, & getting lunch to take home, landlords daughter came by to collect rent, which I gave her, & asked how he's doing.. She said he's at the Dr., which when I last saw him he was very shaky all over, so possibly Parkinson's?
About an hour later, I get a hard knock, "Sheriff". So, I thought one of roomz playing a joke..
Then I was scared to open, cause my room's a cluster fuck.. Curiosity got me, I go out in hall to see sheriff, several responders..
The lady who lives here w/her bf (drinkers) was found on floor of her room, the guy called. He did not know how long she been on the floor. :O
There was a stroke unit huge bus thing out front, 2 fire trucks, sheriff, etc.
So, I was gonna try & visit her at hospital, I asked her bf, he said he talked to a couple nurses, they won't tell him much (since he's not fam). He let her cousin know, she has 5 grown kids.
But, she is now in ICU, so Idk.
She has jaundice, extended belly (not preg.).
We had been trying to get her to go to Dr for weeks since she'd been vomiting for that amount of time.
Needless to say, very anxious rn.
Update : just found out she has a brain tumor, they are trying to get ahold of her family
Thanks for reading.
That's so sad :(
miss.a.p1600
12-08-2019, 12:44 PM
Part 3 of pullback - 24 ish hours since we’ve texted and I’m feeling surprisingly good.
Cleaning up my place and prepping for the date that my future husband (whoever that is) comes over.
Also I think another one of my neighbors is flirting with me? He is Always pulling up same time as me. He told me about his job and how he plans to marry again in near future. He looks decent and I’d ride his face if he made it worth my while BUT he has 2 bad assed bay bays kids and some ugly looking ex wife
yaya_cash
12-09-2019, 12:59 AM
So ready to move. However, I'm not finished with my program yet.
miss.a.p1600
12-09-2019, 07:06 AM
Just peeped my neighbor...taking his bay bay kids to school
JGB2009
12-09-2019, 06:35 PM
I do a horrible job breaking up with people............I have sucked at it since high school.
xxxGothBarbie
12-09-2019, 06:46 PM
I srsly need an intervention with breaking up with toxic people!
NitaBaby
12-09-2019, 07:04 PM
I知 at the point where I知 losing a pound a day, and I know how/why. A part of it is that I stop eating once 7pm hits, no matter what. I didn稚 google this as part of my diet plan, I just know for a fact that I eat too much at night.
But I am hungry as all god damn shit right now. I wanna grab a burger and fries so mf段ng bad. I keep thinking about Oreos and bread and tacos....I want to eat the whole kitchen and go to bed a very jolly woman. Fuck.
miss.a.p1600
12-09-2019, 07:17 PM
I do a horrible job breaking up with people............I have sucked at it since high school.
Me too! I hate being the 'bad guy' and sometimes if its a good guy I just let them do it but if its a jackass type dude then I do it.
I used to do the 'fizzle out' because its a lot less harsh than 'ghosting' ... I prefer to be honest but some people can't handle the truth
WendiStarr
12-09-2019, 08:54 PM
My daughter has some peanut butter and chocolate cereal in the cupboard. It sounds so good and I'm craving for it. I'm so damn tempted to eat some, despite my gestational diabetes. So far I keep drinking water or eating veggies whenever I get sweets craving but it's damn hard.
miss.a.p1600
12-09-2019, 09:45 PM
I thought that not having sex with this guy would keep me from feeling emotionally attached.
It did not.
I’m struggling to detach myself emotionally.
Why self. Why!!!
baer45
12-10-2019, 12:40 PM
Last week, after dancing, I found a person lying on the ground unconscious on the street where I parked my car. I knew it was an OD case. I called 911. Cops came, detective took my statement. Today, I heard back from the detective, that person did not make it. He was 29.
I wish I was there 15 mins earlier.
carmen_b
12-10-2019, 01:28 PM
^ Aw. You tried and it sounds like you responded quickly. Very hard thing emotionally though . ;(