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Kellydancer
04-25-2011, 01:31 PM
I feel the same way. I've really let myself go in the last several months due to stress about my last guy. I didn't realize it until I saw a photo and I looked horrible. I had crappy clothes, my hair was messy, no make up, and looking heavier than I normally am. I am getting my life back on track and taking care of myself.

DesuvsDeath
04-25-2011, 02:35 PM
I confess... I REALLY want restalyne under my eyes and nasolabial folds... however I worry that I will spend the money (I'd LOVE to know how much that would run me, I haven't got the slightest idea)... and will still be completely unattractive and therefore MORE dissatisfied with my appearance.

firemaiden04
04-25-2011, 05:22 PM
I confess:

I go to websites and pretend like I'm rich and am going to buy everything I want, and fill up the online shopping carts with all the stuff I would buy if I had money to burn.

Mindy Bares All
04-25-2011, 06:46 PM
I feel the same way. I've really let myself go in the last several months due to stress about my last guy. I didn't realize it until I saw a photo and I looked horrible. I had crappy clothes, my hair was messy, no make up, and looking heavier than I normally am. I am getting my life back on track and taking care of myself.

Good! I'm proud of you! ;D

Mindy Bares All
04-25-2011, 06:46 PM
I confess:

I keep posting like crazy because I really want to be a featured member already.

Kellydancer
04-26-2011, 01:23 PM
Good! I'm proud of you! ;D

Thanks. I feel I am starting a new part of my life and it feels good.

PleasureVictim
04-26-2011, 05:50 PM
I'm back in an obsessive infatuation stage that feels like love. I'm tired of thinking and fantasizing about this person, especially since i know they're no good for me. I hope my mind gives up on this problem soon and I can focus on something else.

Amareth
04-26-2011, 06:24 PM
after a 3 month dry spell I finally broke it the other night with a guy who I was worried would be a bit vanilla.

There is currently a pair of police-grade handcuffs on my bedside table, slight bruising on my wrists, a stack of porn near the TV and lots of dirty texts on my phone }:D

Kellydancer
04-26-2011, 09:46 PM
I'm back in an obsessive infatuation stage that feels like love. I'm tired of thinking and fantasizing about this person, especially since i know they're no good for me. I hope my mind gives up on this problem soon and I can focus on something else.

I know how this feels. I've given up on being with the last guy but then when I see guys online I think of him again. I know he's not a good choice, I know he's not coming back, he's got way too many issues, but a little part of me wishes he would come back. So I bounce between wanting to find a man just to have sex with, to a man I want to date but not marry, to finding a man to marry just to marry to spite the man I wanted (who in reality would likely never find out). I am obsessing about this whole thing. Then when I look at my profiles on free sites I see guys responding who state they are looking for marriage or relationships. I then back away from them though I want marriage. My most common fantasy is that I marry a guy I don't love and tell him on the wedding night. I doubt I'd do this but I get thrilled at this and no idea why. The odd thing is I wasn't even with this last guy long at all, yet I had this obsession longer than guys I dated for years. I need to meet a great guy who has everything I want so I can give up on this bizarre fantasy with a man who doesn't want to be with me.

Mindy Bares All
04-26-2011, 10:45 PM
I'm back in an obsessive infatuation stage that feels like love. I'm tired of thinking and fantasizing about this person, especially since i know they're no good for me. I hope my mind gives up on this problem soon and I can focus on something else.

Ugh. I know this feeling.

We know this feeling, don't we Kellydancer? ;)

Kellydancer
04-26-2011, 11:02 PM
Ugh. I know this feeling.

We know this feeling, don't we Kellydancer? ;)

Definitely. It is a hard feeling because sometimes we can imagine things are great then we are woken from our delusions and realize it's a mess.

Mindy Bares All
04-26-2011, 11:06 PM
^^^ So true. So true. :(

PleasureVictim
04-27-2011, 02:52 PM
Definitely. It is a hard feeling because sometimes we can imagine things are great then we are woken from our delusions and realize it's a mess.

:( I have all kind of red flags waving alerting me to the huge possibility that if I got with this guy, I will end up hurt. I just want him so badly- it's hard to put into words. I rarely get crushes on anyone, but when I do, watch out. It's a yearning that takes over me. I gave him a shot at a relationship, then he just stops calling me. Just like that. I've been over it for a while, but when I saw him again just in passing, the feelings came back. Now I'm moving closer to him and the fantasies start again. He's like freaking kryptonite to me.

Anyway, today is a bit better- I came across this on someone's blog. It hit really close to home for me and I am trying to cultivate this attitude toward how I feel.

There are people who can walk away from you. Hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: “Let them walk.”

I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you,
loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying
attached to you.

Just let them go.

MistyRose
04-27-2011, 07:01 PM
I confess... I REALLY want restalyne under my eyes and nasolabial folds... however I worry that I will spend the money (I'd LOVE to know how much that would run me, I haven't got the slightest idea)... and will still be completely unattractive and therefore MORE dissatisfied with my appearance.

Excuse me? Completey unattractive?


You sent me pics of you looking gorgeous.
You say you're unattractive.
--------------------------------
You sent me pictures of someone else?


I aced my logics in high school, so I'm going to say that conclusion is inaccurate. :P You look lovely, lady!

DesuvsDeath
04-27-2011, 07:11 PM
^Idk. There are good days and bad.
I think it's the fact that I used to look really interesting... and now I'm just sort of bland and UGH.

It's like a lose-lose situation.
I don't want to be one of those people in the later half of their twenties with dyed hair, piercings, and CLEARLY no real job... but I hate looking so damn boring. I feel sooo ugly all the time.

MistyRose
04-27-2011, 07:20 PM
I find that when I don't feel my best I usually think I look horrible, dreadful and that people hurt just from seeing me. :D So maybe some good fun would make you see how pretty you really are? :)

About the alt look...I used to LOVE having hair in crazy colors, usually highlights or chunks...pink, purple, that unnatural fire red, blue... These days I'm the happiest with my natural brown hair discreetly cut, no jewelry, no clothes that make me stand out in any way. My goal these days is mostly to be as mousy and unnoticeable as I possibly can be. :D

DesuvsDeath
04-27-2011, 09:07 PM
Idk. I WANT to go unnoticed... but I also don't want to look BORING.
Any time I try to dress and look more normal I feel frumpy and disgusting... but out here... no one ever looks nice... so whenever I go out and I'm dressed the way I like to look... I'm completely out of place and uncomfortable because EVERYONE is staring.

Kellydancer
04-27-2011, 09:45 PM
:( I have all kind of red flags waving alerting me to the huge possibility that if I got with this guy, I will end up hurt. I just want him so badly- it's hard to put into words. I rarely get crushes on anyone, but when I do, watch out. It's a yearning that takes over me. I gave him a shot at a relationship, then he just stops calling me. Just like that. I've been over it for a while, but when I saw him again just in passing, the feelings came back. Now I'm moving closer to him and the fantasies start again. He's like freaking kryptonite to me.

Anyway, today is a bit better- I came across this on someone's blog. It hit really close to home for me and I am trying to cultivate this attitude toward how I feel.

There are people who can walk away from you. Hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: “Let them walk.”

I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you,
loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying
attached to you.

Just let them go.

My sister in law always says to get someone go and if they are a soulmate they return. I believe this. Way too often they believe they can change someone and they can't. I normally act normal but when I get into a guy I can act crazy at times.

noelle
04-27-2011, 09:51 PM
Well... after weeks of the company calling me all the time and basically leading me and everyone around me to conclude I got the job, I didn't get it. I have been sobbing for the last seven hours and I feel like such a fucking loser. I wanted to it so badly. And it wouldn't hurt so much if they hadn't led me on like this.

sananeko
04-27-2011, 10:46 PM
I confess i really don't know how I feel.. I seem to be at a bore with him... I told everyone months ago we broke up and it seems today he finally decided today was the day he would break up with me.. I'm not sad or upset at this.. I'm alittle annoyed that he did it over a IM than a phone call.. but also I believe he wanted to fight.. He really didn't know how much he was not in my life and he was talking about how we need to plan for this and oh we need to tell people this.. Umm it was done a long time ago.. Everyone knows and they all have my back cause I made the effort to be nice and not walk off the minute you got bored..

Well now that is one less problem for me now on to the next one.

Kellydancer
04-27-2011, 11:21 PM
I confess that I've developed a bad habit: scratching until I bleed. I have psoriasis, which has been acting up and does in the winter. I've been taking medicine to clear it up but the skin has been peeling. It itches bad so I sit and scratch. However, sometimes I scratch hard and I bleed. I have been bleeding a lot and my bed sheets are blood stained. I think I am itching far heavier than I should. As a result I am peeling even more skin and have been cold, probably the result of this. I wish this would go into remission like it does when it gets warm.

kaiarose
04-28-2011, 08:20 AM
I confess that I've developed a bad habit: scratching until I bleed. I have psoriasis, which has been acting up and does in the winter. I've been taking medicine to clear it up but the skin has been peeling. It itches bad so I sit and scratch. However, sometimes I scratch hard and I bleed. I have been bleeding a lot and my bed sheets are blood stained. I think I am itching far heavier than I should. As a result I am peeling even more skin and have been cold, probably the result of this. I wish this would go into remission like it does when it gets warm.

My husband has psoriasis... it was getting so bad that he finally went to the dermatologist. They prescribed him Taclonex Ointment. It's like $800 a tube (100g) but even our shitty insurance covered it. He has cleared up 95%.. he still has some dry white patches on his shins but it's not even close to what it was..

kaiarose
04-28-2011, 08:23 AM
Last night I had dreams about my 2 ex boyfriends. One of the bf I was engaged to when I was 16 and we were together for 4 years. The other bf I dreamt about, I was in absolute lust over for many years. Unfortunately I cheated with him on the bf I was engaged to and my now hubby before we got married :/ (like waaaay before, 6 or 7 yrs ago) *sigh* I hate these kinds of dreams because you wake up thinking about these guys and now I feel a bit guilty..

Mindy Bares All
04-28-2011, 12:37 PM
It seems like I don't dream anymore. I mean, I know I have them, I just don't remember any of them.

Kellydancer
04-28-2011, 01:49 PM
My husband has psoriasis... it was getting so bad that he finally went to the dermatologist. They prescribed him Taclonex Ointment. It's like $800 a tube (100g) but even our shitty insurance covered it. He has cleared up 95%.. he still has some dry white patches on his shins but it's not even close to what it was..

I'll have to check that out. I still have some medicine so I'm hoping that it works. It looks like the skin is clearing so who knows.

Mindy Bares All
04-29-2011, 12:27 PM
OMG. He's just so perfect to me. :)

LuckyLane
04-29-2011, 04:09 PM
Well... after weeks of the company calling me all the time and basically leading me and everyone around me to conclude I got the job, I didn't get it. I have been sobbing for the last seven hours and I feel like such a fucking loser. I wanted to it so badly. And it wouldn't hurt so much if they hadn't led me on like this.

I'm so sorry to hear this! It really sucks when you want something so bad and are led to believe it is going to happen :(

firemaiden04
04-29-2011, 10:00 PM
I confess...

I feel quite boring on this site a lot of the time, because my relationship is perfectly healthy and normal, and I don't have any huge drama to post about daily.

Mindy Bares All
04-30-2011, 01:04 PM
I confess: I post on this thread entirely TOO MUCH.

And.

Damn! That boy is naughty! ;) Those racy texts still have me a little hot. :)

4everresolutions
04-30-2011, 01:09 PM
I confess...

I feel quite boring on this site a lot of the time, because my relationship is perfectly healthy and normal, and I don't have any huge drama to post about daily.

Yup!:P

sananeko
04-30-2011, 01:19 PM
I confess I'm going to try to have fun tonight. I think I'm alittle too uptight when it comes to fun..

kaiarose
04-30-2011, 01:23 PM
I confess I'm going to try to have fun tonight. I think I'm alittle too uptight when it comes to fun..

I'm the same way... which is why I like to have a couple drinks at work.. let's me relax and b a bit more sociable than I would normally be.
I could've made bank last night but something mentally was holding me back.. It's like I have this awesome boobs and I wasn't using them to my advantage. I was in the mind frame of the flat chested (not that's theres anything wrong with being flat chested!) girl I was. It was weird and I'm disappointed in myself :( I do think I'm putting alot of pressure on myself as well.. *sigh*

Mindy Bares All
04-30-2011, 01:39 PM
^^^^You're still you regardless of your boobs. And you just need to love yourself, and relax.

You're not there for confirmation that you're beautiful/hot/sexy. You're there to take advantage of that and exploit lonely men for ridiculous sums of money. ;)

Methinks maybe not drink at work? But that's a dead horse...

sananeko
04-30-2011, 01:42 PM
I'm the same way... which is why I like to have a couple drinks at work.. let's me relax and b a bit more sociable than I would normally be.
I could've made bank last night but something mentally was holding me back.. It's like I have this awesome boobs and I wasn't using them to my advantage. I was in the mind frame of the flat chested (not that's theres anything wrong with being flat chested!) girl I was. It was weird and I'm disappointed in myself :( I do think I'm putting alot of pressure on myself as well.. *sigh*
I don't drink. It doesn't do the same thing for as it does for everyone else.

kaiarose
04-30-2011, 01:42 PM
Yeah, the no drinking thing ain't gonna happen...LOL.. It's like my anxiety medicine. I don't get trashed I just like a glass of wine or 3...
But other than that, thank you :) I need to relax for sure... going in with a different mindset tonight :)

PleasureVictim
04-30-2011, 04:00 PM
I remember popping Ativan before going in, and waiting for it to kick in when I tried not drinkin at work. A few times I was still too anxious to work effectively, so I just went home. One night I actually went in and drank after taking the ativan. Yeah, that wasn't a good idea at all.

I'm not wound up over being naked, dancing, or myself (that much)- I have no idea what has me so petrified about being in the club at times. So I have to drink. I am doing better about drinking less though, I'm waiting in between drinks.

Ativan didn't work for me, so it's back to Goose.

PleasureVictim
04-30-2011, 04:04 PM
My sister in law always says to get someone go and if they are a soulmate they return. I believe this. Way too often they believe they can change someone and they can't. I normally act normal but when I get into a guy I can act crazy at times.

She's completely correct. I just know people who when one option falls through and they get lonely, they start going down the list to find who will be the next 'one'. I don't want to be that person. Then again, maybe that's how it works much of the time? You never really know how the person you are with might be feeling about some one else.

After I write about how I'm getting over my obsessive fantasy lover, he emails me to apologize. Sigh. Just can't move on.....::):(

Kellydancer
04-30-2011, 10:45 PM
She's completely correct. I just know people who when one option falls through and they get lonely, they start going down the list to find who will be the next 'one'. I don't want to be that person. Then again, maybe that's how it works much of the time? You never really know how the person you are with might be feeling about some one else.

After I write about how I'm getting over my obsessive fantasy lover, he emails me to apologize. Sigh. Just can't move on.....::):(

I think too many people just settle with the first person they can get and that scares me. I could mention all the people who married someone they settled with because they couldn't be with the one they loved. I know for me I still think of my last ex though he had warning signs galore. I know next guy I meet I will not play that game again.

Glamgirl
05-01-2011, 03:13 AM
Just deleted ex's number and stopped following him on twitter. He defriended me on fb last night so i thought "fuck it". Im just annoyed he did it before i did.
Why give me all the bullshit about us meeting up to give me my stuff and be friends if you had no intention of doing that! Dickhead! I am so better off!

luscious sadie
05-01-2011, 03:50 AM
I love having a boyfriend.

SexyLyric
05-01-2011, 05:09 AM
I hate when men say "Spunk"... I just think of funk and that's not a good association... Use another verb please!

_Avery_
05-01-2011, 11:28 AM
deleted.

noelle
05-01-2011, 11:29 AM
Okay, I am feeling a lot better about not getting that job. There are so may more opportunities better suited to me, and if all else fails, I'm fucking hot and can take my clothes off for $ again.

Kisca
05-01-2011, 11:36 AM
I feel bad for putting off a guy on a dating site, that keeps on asking me... He seems nice and all but he msgs me TOO much. I like my alone time, that and Im also nervous.

We were suppose to meet today.. but Im tired. Im not morning/day person, I told him this and that I rather do another day.. He keeps on pressuring me like 4 times... I dont like that at all.. I dont think I want to meet with him at all!

Kellydancer
05-01-2011, 12:49 PM
Kisca, I have had that same problem. Maybe it's me but when a guy contacts me all the time on online dating sites I get freaked out. I want a boyfriend and want to get married as soon as possible, but on the other hand when I guy who I haven't met yet messages me 4 times a day I get warning vibes.

Kisca
05-01-2011, 01:08 PM
Kisca, I have had that same problem. Maybe it's me but when a guy contacts me all the time on online dating sites I get freaked out. I want a boyfriend and want to get married as soon as possible, but on the other hand when I guy who I haven't met yet messages me 4 times a day I get warning vibes.

Yeah. I told him 10 times already today wouldnt be good, and now he is asking to meet tomorrow and such. He is nice but whatever happened to being respectful.. Esp since its online why do you want to meet me so badly? I find that odd. I lost hope in men already ugh. I get enough of them working as a stripper/ I hope your singles group and online dating is doing better! :)

Kellydancer
05-01-2011, 01:13 PM
Yeah. I told him 10 times already today wouldnt be good, and now he is asking to meet tomorrow and such. He is nice but whatever happened to being respectful.. Esp since its online why do you want to meet me so badly? I find that odd. I lost hope in men already ugh. I get enough of them working as a stripper/ I hope your singles group and online dating is doing better! :)

I haven't gone to the singles group yet (supposed to this week) but I will. I'm getting more responses online but still not what I'd like. Way too many losers online. I'm not going to give up though because I have goals and finding a quality man is one of them. Maybe it's me but seems most of the guys I met anxious to meet me were not guys I wanted. Many of them seemed desperate to meet anyone.

BBrigitte
05-01-2011, 01:15 PM
I 'm really not into kids, although I'm great with them most of it's fake and I get more joy out of playing with a dog.


hah ! Same here

Mindy Bares All
05-01-2011, 05:50 PM
I can't stop looking at the pictures of his dick he texted me. :)

Arianna419
05-01-2011, 07:03 PM
Mother in law is coming out for 10 DAYS in August or September....I am already getting anxiety about this.
She said she's not going to be here the entire time, that she's gonna visit some friends too, but I hate not having my house to myself.

That sounds selfish, I know, but 10 DAYS?! 10 DAYS of clutter in my son's room, 10 Days of being forced to make small talk...just...ugh.
I don't like people touching my laundry (I know a lot would appreciate it), but I do my own laundry. I do my own dishes. I do my own cooking. I do my own cleaning.

It's a few months away still, but it's already in my mind and getting to me. I'll only be more anxious at the time approaches.

I'm the same way. After I had a c-section with my son, and after my BA, people were constantly here. I know people are trying to help, but they're still the guest and I feel like I have to be hospitable and be the little hostess... And then I feel guilty if they're cleaning my house and I just don't like my stuff being touched. I'd rather my house stay a mess and be left alone to sleep and recover.