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PleasureVictim
06-07-2013, 08:32 AM
I've had that same feeling for a few years now. Only way to replace good old memories, is with new better ones. Unfortunately, if the bar is set really high, its HARD as fuck to find a better replacement. I would pay for selective parts of my memory to be erased.

It's going to be tough. I met someone who embodied so much of what I wanted in a partner. I'm not even a woman who has some long checklist of wants in a person, but this guy had what I wanted and needed. The ones in the past I've dated were all temporary types I couldn't see myself with, even if I was crazy about them- and I knew that. Before I met him, I told myself no more dating these lukewarm types just to past time.

Then he comes in my life, says all the right things (we have history as friends, so I know he is a stand-up guy who takes care of his business and on the surface is great in a relationship) I get hooked and suddenly his contact dies down. And I'm stuck with the after effects.

LexyNYC
06-07-2013, 01:17 PM
Work has been so slow lately. Like 3 months ago, I was making money hand over fist at my current club. Now, it's so hit or miss and my hits are half of what I used to make on a regular night and my misses are fucking awful. Back when I was raking in the doe, I made a bunch of plans like buying a new car among other things but now that I'm realizing how incredibly inconsistent money is in this business, I've pretty much ruled out getting the car that I want. I feel like stripping is a dying industry. I've seen the decline over the 3 years that I've been dancing but I was still doing great a few months ago, then all of a sudden, idk what happened. People keep telling me that summer is the slow season but this is my third summer and my first two weren't slow. I don't like this "season" crap. It's really discouraging. I'm trying to get back into school so I can finish off my degree and get a vanilla job. I haven't been accepted yet by the school so I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. All that I want is a consistent pay check. I want to be able to make plans like buying the car I want and not be derailed because suddenly customers stop throwing money.

I don't have any other options but to keep stripping and work more often to make up for the bad nights. Really, I still make money but not what I used to and it's not worth it. $200 to be groped for 8 hours is not ok with me when three months ago, I was making $1,500 on any given day. I keep trying to remind myself that back when I was working retail, I got paid $10 an hour so I' should be happy with the $200. But when I was working retail, I was fully clothed, not being groped, not having to listen to a bunch of cheap morons selling me a dream, etc. I'm sooooo over this. I'm supposed to go audition at this club in a few hours but I think I'm going to stay home. I'm in no mood. -___-

charlie61
06-07-2013, 01:59 PM
Work has been so slow lately. Like 3 months ago, I was making money hand over fist at my current club. Now, it's so hit or miss and my hits are half of what I used to make on a regular night and my misses are fucking awful. Back when I was raking in the doe, I made a bunch of plans like buying a new car among other things but now that I'm realizing how incredibly inconsistent money is in this business, I've pretty much ruled out getting the car that I want. I feel like stripping is a dying industry. I've seen the decline over the 3 years that I've been dancing but I was still doing great a few months ago, then all of a sudden, idk what happened. People keep telling me that summer is the slow season but this is my third summer and my first two weren't slow. I don't like this "season" crap. It's really discouraging. I'm trying to get back into school so I can finish off my degree and get a vanilla job. I haven't been accepted yet by the school so I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel. All that I want is a consistent pay check. I want to be able to make plans like buying the car I want and not be derailed because suddenly customers stop throwing money.

I don't have any other options but to keep stripping and work more often to make up for the bad nights. Really, I still make money but not what I used to and it's not worth it. $200 to be groped for 8 hours is not ok with me when three months ago, I was making $1,500 on any given day. I keep trying to remind myself that back when I was working retail, I got paid $10 an hour so I' should be happy with the $200. But when I was working retail, I was fully clothed, not being groped, not having to listen to a bunch of cheap morons selling me a dream, etc. I'm sooooo over this. I'm supposed to go audition at this club in a few hours but I think I'm going to stay home. I'm in no mood. -___-

I hear ya girl. I am chronically burnt out of this industry. I may manage to drag my ass into the club a few times a year, but I think my days of being able to work 2-3x/week are loooong gone. And I'm only 24!

PleasureVictim
06-07-2013, 05:13 PM
I know how you feel Lexy. When I started in '06 I remember dancers complaining how bad things were getting even then. It's definitely going down the tubes even more. Unless a dancer is one of the chosen ones who happen upon the top club on a great night- this lifestyle is going to be very tough unless she has another hustle or little to no bills. I'm seeing dancers happy with bullshit money. I can only assume they live with family or friends, don't have to pay rent- or some shit like that to be able to survive.

I witnessed a cat fight on another popular site, a dancer bragged that she was making $100,000 a year, and that was a bad year if she made on that. She claimed only the best dancers made that much and everyone else should quit, it was pretty amusing, because I have a suspicion she was lying. I know there are dancers making that amount, but where she was dancing at (city/club) I doubt she made that much. Civilians see things like that and in this economy they want a piece. Making stripping popular was a terrible, terrible mistake. I feel that when it gets uncool again, things will be better for dancers. I won't be working long enough to see it.

I'll rather deal with consistent money myself and keep my clothes on. I was saving for a car myself, but I've decided to just pay my tuition and go back to school. I'm done with this shit.

charlie61
06-07-2013, 05:32 PM
I'm in the same boat as you two ladies! I was about to buy a nice hybrid and decided to go back to school instead.

tuesdaymarie
06-12-2013, 11:03 PM
I hate trying to be healthy-fit-thin. Can't I just get a stomach virus for like a week..?

smeca
06-23-2013, 11:28 AM
bf and i had some violent, degrading sex and enacted a rape fantasy this week, and it was glorious. had to not giggle when his younger really-into-feminism sister was chatting with friends about this nigella lawson-choking-pictures thing. fucking choking, ugh yes.
omg does this mean i'm a bad woman and our sex is unfeminist :sarcastic

OliveJardin
06-26-2013, 08:11 PM
Every time I watch the news lately, my heart sinks, stories about violence against women (from all walks of life, from young girls, to women, to the elderly) is getting more and more common here. So, being impulsive, I went online and ordered pepper spray! It's illegal here ::)!

smeca
06-28-2013, 12:04 PM
^oh dear our posts really don't go well together olive

there's a fit man on this course i'm on. i dont actively fancy him but i am defo looking at him a lot. it's a fitness course too soo damn those arms and seeing how strong he is lol

tuesdaymarie
06-28-2013, 01:38 PM
I am going into a new club tonight after putting it off for two weeks and I kind of want to puke a little. I hate anxiety, and I also hate people. Okay, that was my last negative statement for today. Yay work and money and customers, etc?

OliveJardin
06-28-2013, 02:25 PM
^oh dear our posts really don't go well together olive

^Lol...they don't do they! I didn't notice that before I posted.

Addison
07-03-2013, 05:57 AM
I'm pretty sure I called my vibrator "baby" as I was cumming... How sad is that? lol Where did I go wrong in life?

ava$
07-03-2013, 09:20 AM
I am going into a new club tonight after putting it off for two weeks and I kind of want to puke a little. I hate anxiety, and I also hate people. Okay, that was my last negative statement for today. Yay work and money and customers, etc?

I am always going into new clubs cause I travel so much and I am always a bit nervous cause you never know what could happen. I am going to a new club tonight as well and maybe two. *nerves*

tuesdaymarie
07-03-2013, 06:26 PM
^Good luck! My night ended up going well enough. You're brave for being the new girl so often.

ToeOfTheCamel
07-03-2013, 09:09 PM
Today, I told my boyfriend, fulltime father of two, that I don't think I want to have kids anymore. He said, "It's because of my kids, isn't it?" Awkward silence. "Nooo...."
Yes. Yes it is.

ava$
07-04-2013, 01:37 AM
^Good luck! My night ended up going well enough. You're brave for being the new girl so often.

Thanks, my night sucked, kinda except one guy who tipped me like 160 just to sit and do shots w him, he didnt even wanna c me naked, ha that was a very welcomed change. I gotta be the new girl all the time if I wanna travel, no choice and dont love it but I think its getting easier the more I do it.

ava$
07-04-2013, 04:23 PM
I am confessing that I miss my ex bf really bad today but I know hes not for me and we can never be together. Too much has happened in our relationship through the years and hes just not for me even though I loved him a lot and apparently still do(but not enough to want to be with him, I tried that again last year and it just wasnt the same, it didnt feel right and I feel Ive grown past him). I fell for him while I was only 19&now im 25 and he taught me so much, he is basically my daddy.lol.(sounds weird) but I cannot seem to fall for absolutely anyone else, I am scared I am going be loveless forever.

Kellydancer
07-05-2013, 04:22 PM
Today, I told my boyfriend, fulltime father of two, that I don't think I want to have kids anymore. He said, "It's because of my kids, isn't it?" Awkward silence. "Nooo...."
Yes. Yes it is.

Run, run like HELL from a man with kids, especially if the mother is in the picture. The funny thing is this is my one absolute dealbreaker and so many people tell me I'll end up alone to which I reply "oh well".

DonaDiabla
07-05-2013, 05:07 PM
Since I was a little girl, I always wanted to marry for profit and have a nice rich life. This is because I grew up kinda of poor and went to poor public schools. All the preppies at my school had tons of money while I was raised in a single parent household, I was often mad for not having money and wanted to get rich. I still want to become rich by getting married for profit.

DonaDiabla
07-05-2013, 05:08 PM
Another confession....I was going to marry this Indian guy for profit and he bought me a new apartment but he died before I got the rest of his money. Sad but true....he was the best sugar daddy I ever had.

Artema
07-05-2013, 05:30 PM
I wish I could be a better friend. I really haven't. I have slight social anxiety and perfectionism, and I let it ruin my life at times. 4th of July last night was terrible.

charlie61
07-05-2013, 05:50 PM
Run, run like HELL from a man with kids, especially if the mother is in the picture. The funny thing is this is my one absolute dealbreaker and so many people tell me I'll end up alone to which I reply "oh well".

That's fine if you have that as a personal rule, but lots of women can handle dating men with children.

LaurenAus
07-05-2013, 08:51 PM
Another confession....I was going to marry this Indian guy for profit and he bought me a new apartment but he died before I got the rest of his money. Sad but true....he was the best sugar daddy I ever had.



wow some of the girls on here have done well with sugar daddies...I've never gotten anything CLOSE to an apartment ugh

Kellydancer
07-05-2013, 10:21 PM
That's fine if you have that as a personal rule, but lots of women can handle dating men with children.

But all childless people (men and women)need to know that it will change their lives. Some don't care if it means they take a backseat in their SO's lives or hand over a part of their money and some do. However they need to be aware of everything when getting involved with a single dad.

GlamourRouge
07-06-2013, 07:26 AM
But all childless people (men and women)need to know that it will change their lives. Some don't care if it means they take a backseat in their SO's lives or hand over a part of their money and some do. However they need to be aware of everything when getting involved with a single dad.

For a lot of men, you will always take a backseat to other things in their life (whether they do or do not have children), such as his career, his family, his hobbies, etc etc etc.

Kellydancer
07-06-2013, 11:08 AM
Of course, but when it comes to kids it will always be a backseat and can result in a loss of money as well. I am fine taking a backseat when it comes to jobs and things like that but kids? hell no. Any man that would put a hobby over a girlfriend isn't someone I would date either because that would prove he just wasn't into me.

charlie61
07-06-2013, 11:48 AM
Sorry I threadjacked. Back to confessions! :)

lovelydancer
07-07-2013, 06:21 AM
Sometimes when friends or acquaintances wanna hang out, ill say I'm too busy with errands/chores...when in fact I just wanna stay home on Pinterest the entire day. :)

ToeOfTheCamel
07-07-2013, 03:23 PM
^I do the same thing, but with amazon instant video :)

Kellydancer
07-07-2013, 04:19 PM
Apparently I am old fashioned as I enjoy YouTube. I watch a lot of cheesy made for tv movies on YouTube.

PleasureVictim
07-07-2013, 07:36 PM
I had a g-spot orgasm over the weekend. It has been YEARS since that has happened. I'm not broken anymore! LOL

PleasureVictim
07-07-2013, 07:41 PM
That's fine if you have that as a personal rule, but lots of women can handle dating men with children.

Yup! The best thing is to go in with eyes open, and see how the family dynamic works. I have 0 interest in who my ex dates as long as our daughter is not mistreated. I know I'm not the only woman who stays in her role as a co-parent and is not a meddlesome ex.

PleasureVictim
07-07-2013, 07:44 PM
But all childless people (men and women)need to know that it will change their lives. Some don't care if it means they take a backseat in their SO's lives or hand over a part of their money and some do. However they need to be aware of everything when getting involved with a single dad.

Wait- who is handing over money? The Dad or the girlfriend? If the dad is doing his part, he's already paying child support or whatever is agreed to before anyone starts dating him. If that is the case- who is losing money?

BlasianBytch
07-07-2013, 07:49 PM
The last time I masturbated was to gay porn... I think I like it better.

sophiesecrets
07-07-2013, 07:52 PM
My husband was watching these graphic unrated clips that are banned almost everywhere on the net (hes not like into it or anything, but he was bored surfing or whatever, usually broken bones from bike accidents or car accidents, that type of thing)

Except this one...

i walked into the room and happened to see a woman getting her head cut off with a box cutter. Now i see it every time i close my eyes to sleep. Its almost as bad as when the animals u love die in documentaries, and it sticks with you, except much worse... they were speaking in Spanish and it seemed like a drug cartel type clip, like maybe she stole something.

I cant stop wondering about her =( And the graphic image left behind is like seared on my eyelids. lol. STAY AWAY FROM THOSE TYPES OF SITES. My husbands still in trouble over that shit. i know its sad and it happens everyday, but it doesn't have to in my living room =/

ava$
07-07-2013, 08:03 PM
My husband was watching these graphic unrated clips that are banned almost everywhere on the net (hes not like into it or anything, but he was bored surfing or whatever, usually broken bones from bike accidents or car accidents, that type of thing)

Except this one...

i walked into the room and happened to see a woman getting her head cut off with a box cutter. Now i see it every time i close my eyes to sleep. Its almost as bad as when the animals u love die in documentaries, and it sticks with you, except much worse... they were speaking in Spanish and it seemed like a drug cartel type clip, like maybe she stole something.

I cant stop wondering about her =( And the graphic image left behind is like seared on my eyelids. lol. STAY AWAY FROM THOSE TYPES OF SITES. My husbands still in trouble over that shit. i know its sad and it happens everyday, but it doesn't have to in my living room =/

I know what it like to see a scaring incident also you will never forget seeing someone die, I saw someone dead I was close to after they shot themselves in the head, I will never forget it, its been 2 years now but for about the 1st year I never stopped thinking about it, its horrible, something about seeing a death..But ugh who voluntarily watches stuff like that, ugh..

LilyAnderson
07-07-2013, 08:16 PM
Confession: I wish I could get up, and just runaway from this life up north.

Kellydancer
07-07-2013, 08:30 PM
Wait- who is handing over money? The Dad or the girlfriend? If the dad is doing his part, he's already paying child support or whatever is agreed to before anyone starts dating him. If that is the case- who is losing money?

The new girlfriend. If he marries her she can be forced to pay child support (such as he loses his job) or he can be forced to pay more if the new wife makes a lot. The new wife may end up supporting the household because the dad has to pay child support, and often alimony if the ex-wife is lazy. There is no way I am going to support someone else's kids and definitely not supporting some lazy ex-wife (and this happened to a guy I dated where his ex was too lazy to work). Not to mention if he is spending most of his check on his kids and ex then he doesn't have much money to spend on the new girlfriend unless he makes a lot of money and most guys don't.

When I did online dating one of these guys admitted to me Applebees was a fancy date for a special occasion. No way, that's what I consider a normal dinner date. I once dated a dad when I was younger who could only afford budget movies and McDonalds and it got lame fast.

takiaya
07-07-2013, 08:41 PM
I had a miscarriage at the beginning of last month, today is the first day of my first period since then...I think I would have a breakdown if I had to deal with assholes at work today so Im not working live tonight

charlie61
07-07-2013, 08:49 PM
I had a miscarriage at the beginning of last month, today is the first day of my first period since then...I think I would have a breakdown if I had to deal with assholes at work today so Im not working live tonight

:grouphug:

simone87
07-07-2013, 09:21 PM
i really want to force my friend to read " why men love bitches " along with " he's just not that into you". like tie her town and tape her eyelids open! look, i like listening and helping out my friends and being there for them..but when you have me on the phone for 3 hours everyday sobbing about how he would't kiss you after the third date, he turned you down when you invited him to you house, he isn't texting you...i just want to scream " HE ISN"T INTO YOU!! what other signs do you need? you need him to make a public statement??!!"
im almost just hoping he tells her straight out to go away so i don't have to hear this for ANOTHER two weeks! i have a life!
why do girls try and make excuses for behaviour that's unacceptable? " oooh, maybe he's busy, maybe he's just shy" or an even better one - " if i don't text him he'll think im rejecting him and men don't like that!!" i just want to pound my head against the wall. can't...do...this..anymore

DonaDiabla
07-08-2013, 12:38 AM
Gay porn is beautiful :)

charlie61
07-08-2013, 12:41 AM
^Right there with ya, sister. There's something about the power dynamic being equal that makes it way sexier than straight porn IMO.

Artema
07-08-2013, 08:38 AM
I saw 3D model porn and it is less than graceful. This for example (http://www.pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=1665145795) /:O :rotfl:

I seriously wonder what it is about it that turns people on.

Kellydancer
07-08-2013, 11:23 AM
i really want to force my friend to read " why men love bitches " along with " he's just not that into you". like tie her town and tape her eyelids open! look, i like listening and helping out my friends and being there for them..but when you have me on the phone for 3 hours everyday sobbing about how he would't kiss you after the third date, he turned you down when you invited him to you house, he isn't texting you...i just want to scream " HE ISN"T INTO YOU!! what other signs do you need? you need him to make a public statement??!!"
im almost just hoping he tells her straight out to go away so i don't have to hear this for ANOTHER two weeks! i have a life!
why do girls try and make excuses for behaviour that's unacceptable? " oooh, maybe he's busy, maybe he's just shy" or an even better one - " if i don't text him he'll think im rejecting him and men don't like that!!" i just want to pound my head against the wall. can't...do...this..anymore

Why Men Love Bitches is a good book to read because it helps women be assertive. He's just Not That Into You is a piece of trash written by an alcoholic comedian with no relationship experience.

Maybe it's me but while I'm not clingy or anything like that but when I play hard to get or ignore men they go on to the next woman. The only guys who ever then pursued me were the creeps I didn't want to begin with. That's why I tell women have your own life but don't play games because unless you're hot and the guy doesn't have options he will move on. I don't think it's weird not to kiss after the third date because I have waited even longer than that.

Related to this but I have a couple of dates set up with men I rejected the first time I did online but kept in touch with. I'm not attracted to them at all (one is way too big for my taste)but figure who knows, maybe they can buy me things and maybe I'll fall for them. Maybe not but they are desperate for a girlfriend so that makes a difference. Since I can't seem to attract men I like I will date men who find me attractive.

tuesdaymarie
07-08-2013, 07:14 PM
Idk if it's anxiety or what, but I genuinely need a medication or technique (gah, meditation, I know, I just... can't right now) to make my inner dialogue stfu sometimes. I am trying to decide whether to sell my car, and it is turning into thousands of branching thoughts in my head about credit scores, my SO's job, differences in house fees, SOB laws in the two counties I'm near, mileage, and what the fuck I would even buy if I were to get a new car. And I just... I need some quiet time, brain.

simone87
07-08-2013, 07:18 PM
ehh i've never read he's just not that into you, but i feel like saying exactly that to her! i don't think anybody should play games, you SHOULD be a smart, independent woman who doesn't need a man and who isn't clingy..but on the other hand she is very clingy/obsessive/way too over the top with this so im trying to get her to at least calm down or fake it til she makes it. this guy has some serious issues.. she found him online ( not a fan of online dating), and just seems to be very rude to her ( maybe he's just an idiot who doesn't know wtf he's doing). i just want to stop hearing about it!!!! does that make me a bad friend? im just fed up. hours and hours of it everyday
im sorry but my rule is, if a man doesn't let you know he likes you, doesn't treat you like a queen, doesn't make you feel loved and beautiful--onto the next!! period. you don't need to call your damn friends and analyze it

Kellydancer
07-08-2013, 09:26 PM
I think the important thing to remember is put one's self before a relationship. Yes it might be selfish but you will have yourself forever don't do stupid things. Years ago I would do stupid things for guys and it never paid off. Now I don't do that at all. Clingy people to be honest scare me and when I did online dating came across a lot of clingy men. NEXT! I don't want to spend time dealing with that because clingy often become controlling and the fact is I have my own life.

No that doesn't make you a bad friend I had a friend like that wouldn't listen to me when I would tell her not to chase a guy. She would buy presents, sleep with them right away then wonder why he never committed. I would tell her you can't do that at all.

PleasureVictim
07-09-2013, 11:00 AM
The last time I masturbated was to gay porn... I think I like it better.

That's 90% of what I watch and get off to.

I knew it was over for my ex when he would be going down and nothing was happening- but as soon as I started thinking about 2 men- here comes the O.

ava$
07-10-2013, 04:07 AM
Sometimes i wish I could just stab stupid people especially customers that say fucked up shit "can I pay you 100 for fuck?" BIIIIItch no! *stab* I seriously wanna hurt these fucks some nights! Or some stupid new chick giving it all away for free ruining our game *stab*. this needs to become legal/ok asap. Or run over people who walk infront of me when they see I am driving, I mean really why are we wrong if we hit some stupid fuck who decides there not gunna stop for traffic, annoying, yield bitches I know u see me! Or a cheap fuck sitting at a stage show and doesnt tip, I wanna shove my heal in their eye. I secretly love to be violent when I can, like I look for the opportunity and if it presents itself I go from 0-60 right away, but I never do it for no reason or if not justified, ever, I am always attacked 1st but I go there. when I have sex w someone i think will like it, I choke them as hard as I can and I fuckin love it. I choked one guy so hard he said he almost passed out, haha, it was great, I wonder if beating them would be even more fun...hmmm.lol