View Full Version : Question to dancers..
JPalace
12-12-2010, 02:17 PM
Once I asked a waitress to ask the dancer if she could be able to dance for me when she had finished with the current dude and it worked, and at least for me didn't seem something rude.
I like the waitress bring notice of your interest.
Here's a simple scene. Wait for a lull in the conversation before approaching. "Excuse me. I dont mean to interrupt, but for only a second. When it's convenient, I'd like a dance with you." Smile, excuse youself again and turn and walk off. Then wait and see. If you have to leave before she she comes, no big deal.
Interrupted for five seconds. I agree on the waitress thing...what she may whisper to the dancer sitting with me is none of my business. But a guy stopping by is an interruption and frankly disrespectful. He has no idea if I have paid her handsomely to sit there and talk to me or what. Those 5 seconds belong to me. Most dancers wind up on stage.That is the time for guys let the dancers know you are in the house and interested, not disrupting a fellow customers' game.
FBR
jester214
12-12-2010, 03:23 PM
Ehh...
I can understand the feelings of the dancer, the guy getting interupted and the interuptee. In certain situations almost anything is acceptable. It just has to be done properly.
That said if I can't get a Dancer's attention without going up to her, then there's a decent chance I probably do not want her attention.
lopaw
12-12-2010, 07:56 PM
This very scenario happened to me yesterday, but I was on the other side of it, for once.
On a club visit yesterday, a dancer that I have not gotten dances from in awhile (and I miss terribly) stopped by my table on her way to the stage to say hi and give me a hug. After wiping the drool away, I mumbled something incoherantly & watched her dance on stage. Tipped her, as usual. Afterwards, she came back out and headed right over to another customer. No prob, I thought....I'll wait it out. The club was very dead - 3 dancers and about a dozen PL's. After giving the guy what seemed like a million dances, she strutted over to a table nearby and planted herself down to chat with the two guys sitting there. This thread popped into my head for a second, and I thought "what would happen if I turned the tables and grabbed her from those two guys?". Well, of course I didn't. I was a bit disappointed that I didn't get any dances from her, and left. I have her phone number, so I texted her from my car to say that perhaps we'll visit some other time. She immediately texted back and was astonished that I didn't come over to that table and take her away - that those two guys were friends of hers and it would have been fun for me to come over. Geez!
You can't win.
FWIW - it was definitely my bad for not telling her when she stopped by for a hug that I didn't have much time and would she please dance for me. It's worth noting that I often become a stammering chowderhead when gorgeous half-naked women hug me ;D.
yoda57us
12-12-2010, 08:11 PM
FWIW - It's worth noting that I often become a stammering chowderhead when gorgeous half-naked women hug me ;D.
I can relate....;)
countedcrow
12-13-2010, 02:56 AM
This happened to me as well Saturday night. I was sitting with my fav girl and I saw this guy walking towards us with a goofy smile on his face. He went right up to her and started talking about getting dances, didn't even say "excuse me". It kind of annoyed me, but the truth of the matter was I was getting ready to leave soon anyway. I had already gotten some dances myself, and we were just hanging out. She pointed him to an area to wait for her and then turned to me and said "Well, I have some business to attend to if that's OK with you." Certainly she didn't need for me to say it was OK, but that definitely made me feel better.
It's worth noting that I often become a stammering chowderhead when gorgeous half-naked women hug me ;D.
I'm the same way, and on top of that I'm painfully shy when I first meet ANY person anywhere. To offset this in the club I tell dancers "I'm sorry I'm not good talking to fully clothed ugly girls, so the only thing I can add to a conversation with a half-naked beautiful one is a stutter."
Hopper
12-13-2010, 05:23 AM
I agree on the waitress thing...what she may whisper to the dancer sitting with me is none of my business. But a guy stopping by is an interruption and frankly disrespectful. He has no idea if I have paid her handsomely to sit there and talk to me or what. Those 5 seconds belong to me. Most dancers wind up on stage.That is the time for guys let the dancers know you are in the house and interested, not disrupting a fellow customers' game.
FBR
Usually I would not ask a dancer about an LD in front of other customers with her. It's confronting and there are staff for that. But nor would I wait for her to go on stage. That could be hours, because of the length of each set, or never for some dancers who feel they don't need to go on or miss their set because of other business. Often enough, they are walking the floor by themselves, looking for their next mark.
In some cases the customer with the dancer is fucking over the other customers. I'm not knocking paying for convo (the dancers definitely like it), but the focus of SCs is naked girls. Customers paying for convo are keeping other customers from buying LDs. You can buy a group of pretty girls in a regular club drinks so they talk to you.
If we are talking about consideration for other customers, then even though you are paying, shouldn't you equally be considering other customers and avoiding pissing them off? If it's only who's paying that counts, then a customer wanting to buy an LD has as much right of way as one just sitting talking, even if he's paying too. This thread is not about the money, it's about consideration for other customers.
yoda57us
12-13-2010, 09:16 AM
^ OK, why on earth would I have any interest in consideration for other customers? Their good time in the club is not my responsibility or my concern. I go to the club to have a good time. I bring money with me in pursuit of that. I don't handcuff any dancer to my table or in any way prevent them from pursuing any guy in the club that they think may be a potential customer. I know there are needy, whiny guys who piss and moan when a dancer tries to move on but I'm not one of them. my concern is for my entertainment and the dancer's ability to earn a living. The needs of other customers are not on my radar.
The bottom line for me is that, IMHO, it is the dancer's responsibility to control all situations in the club that effect her money. My favs do and, to be honest, it's one of the reasons I never interrupt a dancer and a customer. It's rude and it is also something that I learned not to do years ago when I first started going to clubs.
I understand that girls will sometimes sit with guys who don't spend just to look busy but there has to be a limit. My favs do this all the time but they are also constantly aware of what is going on in the club. When they see a target they go after it. If they don't, quite frankly, it often means they aren't interested in the guy.
I understand that ladies have to take some time with guys to work them and figure out if they are going to spend or not but, honestly, if a gal is sitting with a guy for so long that other guys think it's time to cut in then she has probably spent too long trying...and yes, I know that is ultimately her call.
Lastly, I don't pay for conversation but I do buy dances in bulk or do VIP. Part of my time with my favs includes table time. That's part of our deal. That's one of the reasons that she is a fav. As I said in a previous post I visit to relax, not just grope a hot naked woman. I don't go in at peak times and I always spend well. When the lady I am sitting with thinks it's time for her to go work the floor she knows full well that she is welcome to do so with no whiny attitude from me. As I said, it's her call.
bem401
12-13-2010, 11:17 AM
Quite frankly, I think any dancer with her radar up will notice virtually every guy who notices her (particularly when its slow). A good dancer realizes that, unless she is doing a private dance, she is on display and pays attention to the reactions she gets not just from the guy she is presently sitting with.
If you want a dance from her, I'd suggest you make a point of letting her know you're noticing her. Eye contact and a smile should send the message. Odds are, she interpret that as an interest in buying a dance. On the rare occasions I bother going into the clubs these days, I try to avoid eye contact for that very reason. It was the method I used when I was interested in dances.
Djoser
12-13-2010, 03:49 PM
In some cases the customer with the dancer is fucking over the other customers. I'm not knocking paying for convo (the dancers definitely like it), but the focus of SCs is naked girls. Customers paying for convo are keeping other customers from buying LDs.
No he's not. The other customers have the option to pay women to sat and talk to them as well. The women are being paid to entertain the individual customer. It doesn't matter whether they are talking or dancing.
The stage is for the entire club's clientele--that's where the dancers get naked for all to see, all night long. The women are free agents once they are offstage.
The customers have no moral obligation to any other customers, so long as they are following the rules, and being polite if they bump into them, etc. The grey area is this question of approaching another guy's table, which needs to be done with extreme discretion if at all, IMO.
I would never do it. But then I don't get dances.
KS_Stevia
12-14-2010, 08:58 AM
Quite frankly, I think any dancer with her radar up will notice virtually every guy who notices her (particularly when its slow). A good dancer realizes that, unless she is doing a private dance, she is on display and pays attention to the reactions she gets not just from the guy she is presently sitting with.
.
Not always. It depends on how the club is laid out. Some clubs have a lot of dark, hidden corners. And if dancer has made her rounds, sits with a club reg to look busy, and some slimy PL slithers into one of those dark corner booths, she very well may not have a vantage point.
Here's the thing...if you want a dance from a girl; 1. if she's at the bar, or otherwise in a standing up type place talking to a custy, go up to her and ask politely for her company when she is ready.
2. If she is sitting down with custies, send your waitress over. What's the worst that can happen? If she's getting paid for her time, then she just won't leave. Another girl will come around.
This isn't really that difficult a concept people. I know that everyone wants to be "seduced" at the club. But if you are dead set on the hottest chick in the club, chances are she's going to be in demand and you need to do something to announce your intentions. Otherwise, you may just end up with another naked girl squirming in your lap. Oh, the horror of it all! :P
rickdugan
12-14-2010, 09:14 PM
In some cases the customer with the dancer is fucking over the other customers. I'm not knocking paying for convo (the dancers definitely like it), but the focus of SCs is naked girls. Customers paying for convo are keeping other customers from buying LDs. You can buy a group of pretty girls in a regular club drinks so they talk to you.
Really? Who is another customer to tell me what I should be focusing on or how I should spend my money in the club? And do you really believe that many dancers would burn loads of time with one guy, foregoing other opportunities, if she did not believe that it was to her benefit?
When I visit my local club my fav sits for hours at a time with me, no doubt depriving others. This also happens with a couple of "friends" sprinkled around clubs that I frequent during road trips. Now why do they do this? Because they make good money from my visits.
Now my local club fav knows that she can accomodate VIP and LD requests if she wants without fear of income loss, but she usually does so judiciously. My road friends usually stay very close for fear that another girl might catch my fancy - perhaps well justified as I have little loyalty to a girl I see 2-3 times per year.
Now in all of this do I ever stop to consider, even for a nanosecond, how other customers might feel? Why the hell should I? Also, while I never barge over to a girl while she is talking with someone else, I have used eye signals and, one of my favorites, the bartender message method. Nothing makes a girl move faster than having the words "VIP room" whispered in her ear. ;)
Another customer that is being deprived of a girl that is spending time with me should feel free to: (1) outgun me with $$$ for her attention (it happens from time to time); (2) find another girl; or (3) wait until I'm finished, though of course he runs the risk that she will never free up. :D
Djoser
12-14-2010, 10:18 PM
Yeah, I see a lot of the guys looking at me sitting on my big velvet couch, with a bunch of dancers hanging around enjoying themselves, drinking the drinks I bought them, and going up to tip the girls onstage for me--and never, ever, ever buying a single dance. Fuck 'em if they don't like it.
The girls are very happy to be tipped well and kept in drinks, and have a comfortable spot to chill without some douchebag trying to stick his finger up their ass, or adjusting his cock so that she can rub it better with her ass, or asking them for dates. If guys want dances the girls figure it out (from who has tipped them, or seeing their regulars walk in the door, etc.), and go get them.
Those guys could rent their own couch (there are several in this club), could tip the onstage girls lavishly, could buy them drinks, and could have what I have quite easily. But a lot of them just sit there watching everyone else having fun, instead. That's not my problem, and it's not the club's problem, and it's not the girls' problem.
Hopper
12-15-2010, 12:33 AM
Now in all of this do I ever stop to consider, even for a nanosecond, how other customers might feel? Why the hell should I?
Another customer that is being deprived of a girl that is spending time with me should feel free to: (1) outgun me with $$$ for her attention (it happens from time to time); (2) find another girl; or (3) wait until I'm finished, though of course he runs the risk that she will never free up. :D
Exactly - and why also should the person interrupting care? A couple of people said that interrupting a convo to ask about a LD is rude and inconsiderate of the other customer. My point was merely that if that's the case, then hogging a dancer is inconsiderate; and as you say, why should you consider other customers? Well, you don't have to The dancer decides who's money she takes for what.
I agree with most of what yoda, djoser (though not his last post) and rick said in their responses to me, some of it is even partly my own point. This thread is about whether it's okay to interrupt a convo or a hustle to ask about a dance. I am saying, it is just as okay to interrupt as it is okay for the customer being interrupted to sit and chat, whether or not he is paying to do so, and that neither customer is obliged to have any consideration for the other.
That all said, I do get annoyed when some fuckhead waltzes into the club like he owns the joint, during a busy time, goes straight over to a popular dancer bear-hugs her for a minute of "intimate" greeting like they are sweethearts, or making some deal, takes her to his table to buy her drinks and chat about God knows what for some indefinite period before going for one or two LDs with her. Technically if she's with it he's in the right, but these guys always look to me like they are marking out territory and giving all the other customers the big finger, though I doubt they are sparing much conscious thought for them.
Hopper
12-15-2010, 12:48 AM
Yeah, I see a lot of the guys looking at me sitting on my big velvet couch, with a bunch of dancers hanging around enjoying themselves, drinking the drinks I bought them, and going up to tip the girls onstage for me--and never, ever, ever buying a single dance. Fuck 'em if they don't like it.
The girls are very happy to be tipped well and kept in drinks, and have a comfortable spot to chill without some douchebag trying to stick his finger up their ass, or adjusting his cock so that she can rub it better with her ass, or asking them for dates. If guys want dances the girls figure it out (from who has tipped them, or seeing their regulars walk in the door, etc.), and go get them.
Those guys could rent their own couch (there are several in this club), could tip the onstage girls lavishly, could buy them drinks, and could have what I have quite easily. But a lot of them just sit there watching everyone else having fun, instead. That's not my problem, and it's not the club's problem, and it's not the girls' problem.
You may be tipping them for their time, but they can make more money in that time from LDs (I doubt you are tipping them all at the same rate as for dances) and all the stuff they have to put up with during LDs comes with the job unfortunately, though it's not in the description or included in the price.
Really, SCs are a lot less fun when the dancers are sitting about drinking and talking with the same guy the whole time I'm in it.
As for me being able to do what you do, I don't see the point. I don't go to a SC just to talk to girls or buy them drinks. Girls will talk to me if I buy them drinks in any regular club. I meet and talk with pretty girls in places where drinks are not being served. I tip girls on stage I like a decent amount (not every one of them), I buy girls drinks if I want to drink with them, I tip them for convo if I like talking to them and they stay beyond their hustle time, and I don't try to finger dancers during LDs, though grinding is okay by me if they choose to do that. What you do is probably fun but it's not the kind of fun I go to SCs for.
True it's not your problem, or the girl's obviously if they stay, but we are not talking in this thread about our own problems, we are talking about causing other people problems. If all the girls are hired out over in one guy's corner, then I have wasted the high cost of the entry fee and that is a problem. FBR called interrupting another customer talking to a dancer "fucko"-ing and you said "fuck 'em" if customers don't like what you are doing. Neither is wrong from a purely business POV, but that doesn't necessarily make it okay. I like to think that society is not all about business.
Kellydancer
12-15-2010, 01:37 AM
I've had customers come up when I was with another customer and tell me they wanted a dance with me when I was done. In many cases I told them not for awhile, since I was with a regular, so they waited. Other times the customer told me to take care of the other customer (in other words "not interested") and some cases they would be "let's get a dance now". I don't remember another customer getting mad about this.
Usually I would not ask a dancer about an LD in front of other customers with her. It's confronting and there are staff for that. But nor would I wait for her to go on stage. That could be hours, because of the length of each set, or never for some dancers who feel they don't need to go on or miss their set because of other business. Often enough, they are walking the floor by themselves, looking for their next mark.
In some cases the customer with the dancer is fucking over the other customers. I'm not knocking paying for convo (the dancers definitely like it), but the focus of SCs is naked girls. Customers paying for convo are keeping other customers from buying LDs. You can buy a group of pretty girls in a regular club drinks so they talk to you.
If we are talking about consideration for other customers, then even though you are paying, shouldn't you equally be considering other customers and avoiding pissing them off? If it's only who's paying that counts, then a customer wanting to buy an LD has as much right of way as one just sitting talking, even if he's paying too. This thread is not about the money, it's about consideration for other customers.
Actually, I've had many customers who paid me to talk with them. Their money is just as valid as a guy who wants a dance.
If I ever get married, I want my future wife to be the entertainment at the bachelor party. And any friend of mine who attempts to humiliate me with any of those infantile rituals will no longer be my friend
This is an interesting comment and I remember an ex boyfriend asking me to dance for him if we married. I think the only way I would dance at my would- be husband's bachelor party is if I remain clothed and it was more of a joke. As strange as this sounds I never felt comfortable dancing at bachelor parties for friends or relatives. If by chance I was to marry the guy I like he'd be more interested in a Star Wars party for a bachelor party than having strippers (though we met in a club). If it was a guy I married who wanted a stripper to be honest I would feel uncomfortable, though I've been a party stripper. I think it's because I know how many other bachelor party dancers act.
rickdugan
12-15-2010, 05:09 AM
Hopper, to make my previous comments clear, I don't really care about what other customers think. Having said this, IMHO there is an etiquette to how this is done and barging up while two people are talking is rude and inconsiderate. You don't know the situation you are interrupting and you could be putting the dancer in a difficult position. There are other ways that you can let her know that you are interested and she can decide if and when to act on your interest.
Now I mentioned eye signals or using the bartender to let her know that I'm interested, but I also should have mentioned that this is infrequent for me and only done in certain unique situations. As a matter of policy I never chase after a girl. I'll make sure that she knows that I'm interested, but IMHO barging in on her while she's dealing with someone else comes off as a little desperate. :O
Rookie2010
12-15-2010, 05:13 AM
barging in on her while she's dealing with someone else comes off as a little desperate. :O
I don't think one should worry about looking desperate when in the SC looking for lap dances...
Just my :twocents:
rickdugan
12-15-2010, 05:40 AM
I don't think one should worry about looking desperate when in the SC looking for lap dances...
Just my :twocents:
Really? And does the lioness treat a wolf the same way that she does a frightened gazelle? ::)
Now in the end we are all food, but whether at a club or in any other setting how one is perceived will impact how one is treated. These girls are doing a job, but they are still human. In fact, there are a fair number of dancers that do a very good job of preying on weakness, and others that will treat you very differently depending upon how they size you up, so it most certainly does matter.
yoda57us
12-15-2010, 05:49 AM
I don't think one should worry about looking desperate when in the SC looking for lap dances...
Just my :twocents:
I don't think "looking desperate" is a good way to approach much of anything in life. Spending money in a strip club included.
Hopper
12-15-2010, 06:03 AM
Hopper, to make my previous comments clear, I don't really care about what other customers think. Having said this, IMHO there is an etiquette to how this is done and barging up while two people are talking is rude and inconsiderate. You don't know the situation you are interrupting and you could be putting the dancer in a difficult position. There are other ways that you can let her know that you are interested and she can decide if and when to act on your interest.
Now I mentioned eye signals or using the bartender to let her know that I'm interested, but I also should have mentioned that this is infrequent for me and only done in certain unique situations. As a matter of policy I never chase after a girl. I'll make sure that she knows that I'm interested, but IMHO barging in on her while she's dealing with someone else comes off as a little desperate. :O
First, I can't remember ever actually interrupting a dancer talking to another customer. I would avoid doing so if I can - I'd ask another dancer, waitress or other staff to handle it. I agree that it could appear rude and desperate. However, if the customer looks like he's not interested after a reasonable amount of hustling, or if he's being a dick, it's probably okay for me to walk over myself.
You never chase after a girl, even through a bartender? You could be waiting all night for her to come to you, or even within range of your eye signals. The way I see it, it's just business and if I want a dancer I need to tell her as soon as I decide I do. No point in wasting time with games - I'm not interested in them. I just want a LD. There is no ego involved. There's time enough for interaction with the dancer during the LD. More fun too.
Hopper
12-15-2010, 06:17 AM
Really? And does the lioness treat a wolf the same way that she does a frightened gazelle? ::)
Now in the end we are all food, but whether at a club or in any other setting how one is perceived will impact how one is treated. These girls are doing a job, but they are still human. In fact, there are a fair number of dancers that do a very good job of preying on weakness, and others that will treat you very differently depending upon how they size you up, so it most certainly does matter.
So don't be weak. Pay your money and make sure you get what you want for it. Deal with her. Then she will perceive you how you wish. I see your point that a dancer approaching a customer is psychologically at less of an advantage than one who is requested by the customer. But I look like a loser sitting in a SC all night waiting for the dancer I like to approach me anyway. And I don't want to waste time playing hard-to-sell once she does. I don't look like a push-over just because I'm doing the asking.
yoda57us
12-15-2010, 08:06 AM
I don't think asking a dancer for a dance means that you are desperate or that you appear desperate to the lady in question. Under this scenario simply becoming a regular customer of a dancer would also make you desperate in her eyes. That simply isn't reality most of the time...though it certainly may be some of the time. Yes, there are dancers who take advantage of guys but they will do that regardless of who does the asking.
I also don't really thinks it's possible for a guy sitting across the room to have a realistic idea of what sort of interaction is taking place between a dancer and customer sitting together. If a guy decides to "move in" he is doing it out of impatience, not out if some great concern for the dancer that she is wasting her time with a guy.
AmyLynne
12-15-2010, 10:09 AM
its better to just not interupt. if you really want to see me then go through the waitress and get a note to me. I dont come to your work and interupt you when youre with your customers dont do it to me.
rickdugan
12-15-2010, 10:43 AM
You never chase after a girl, even through a bartender? You could be waiting all night for her to come to you, or even within range of your eye signals. The way I see it, it's just business and if I want a dancer I need to tell her as soon as I decide I do. No point in wasting time with games - I'm not interested in them. I just want a LD. There is no ego involved. There's time enough for interaction with the dancer during the LD. More fun too.
And if I am then so what? IMO it is better that I wait, or choose another girl if I can't wait, then chase after a dancer that is sitting with another customer. As yoda pointed out, you have no idea what's happening over there and you could be putting the dancer in a bad spot.
I've used the bartender a few times over the years, but that has almost always been in unique circumstances. Sometimes it resulted in the girl coming over and sometimes not. C'est la vie. But under no circumstances would I go to her directly and interrupt.
And label it as impatient, desperate, or whatever, but someone who needs a dance so much with that particular dancer at that moment that he is willing to bust in while she is dealing with another customer does come off as needy. Opinions may differ, but with some of the girls that I deal with that perception would hinder me a great deal in some of my activities. Now if your one and only interest is a couple of lapdances then you may not care, but there it is.
Djoser
12-15-2010, 12:32 PM
If it was a guy I married who wanted a stripper to be honest I would feel uncomfortable, though I've been a party stripper. I think it's because I know how many other bachelor party dancers act.
She'd be dancing for me and me alone. There would be other dancers for the other guys at the party. But it's all kind of a joking fantasy anyway, a kind of 'Anti-bachelor Party', if you will. If and when I ever get married, I doubt there will be a bachelor party of any kind.
But if I did, the only woman I'd want dancing for me would be the one I was going to marry the next day. Maybe this makes it a little more clear as to what I meant.
Kellydancer
12-15-2010, 12:47 PM
She'd be dancing for me and me alone. There would be other dancers for the other guys at the party. But it's all kind of a joking fantasy anyway, a kind of 'Anti-bachelor Party', if you will. If and when I ever get married, I doubt there will be a bachelor party of any kind.
But if I did, the only woman I'd want dancing for me would be the one I was going to marry the next day. Maybe this makes it a little more clear as to what I meant.
I had a feeling that's what you meant (and I saw your other post). I was talking to a friend and they asked me if I would have a bachelorette party when I marry with a male stripper and I said probably not. Been there, done that. Besides, I've sown my wild oats and am not a 20 something. I'd probably just go out and drink and to a club (though this doesn't interest me anymore either).
I don't think asking a dancer for a dance means that you are desperate or that you appear desperate to the lady in question. Under this scenario simply becoming a regular customer of a dancer would also make you desperate in her eyes. That simply isn't reality most of the time...though it certainly may be some of the time. Yes, there are dancers who take advantage of guys but they will do that regardless of who does the asking.
I also don't really thinks it's possible for a guy sitting across the room to have a realistic idea of what sort of interaction is taking place between a dancer and customer sitting together. If a guy decides to "move in" he is doing it out of impatience, not out if some great concern for the dancer that she is wasting her time with a guy.
Agreed with what you posted. I've heard the silly desperate comments and I don't think being a customer or a regular automatically makes one "desperate". What says desperate is guys not dating other women because he thinks he has a chance with me.
Interestingly, I've had guys wait hours to get a dance with me. I often had a line of men waiting for me but they were all patient.
Djoser
12-15-2010, 12:56 PM
You may be tipping them for their time, but they can make more money in that time from LDs (I doubt you are tipping them all at the same rate as for dances) and all the stuff they have to put up with during LDs comes with the job unfortunately, though it's not in the description or included in the price.
Really, SCs are a lot less fun when the dancers are sitting about drinking and talking with the same guy the whole time I'm in it.
As for me being able to do what you do, I don't see the point. I don't go to a SC just to talk to girls or buy them drinks. Girls will talk to me if I buy them drinks in any regular club. I meet and talk with pretty girls in places where drinks are not being served. I tip girls on stage I like a decent amount (not every one of them), I buy girls drinks if I want to drink with them, I tip them for convo if I like talking to them and they stay beyond their hustle time, and I don't try to finger dancers during LDs, though grinding is okay by me if they choose to do that. What you do is probably fun but it's not the kind of fun I go to SCs for.
True it's not your problem, or the girl's obviously if they stay, but we are not talking in this thread about our own problems, we are talking about causing other people problems. If all the girls are hired out over in one guy's corner, then I have wasted the high cost of the entry fee and that is a problem. FBR called interrupting another customer talking to a dancer "fucko"-ing and you said "fuck 'em" if customers don't like what you are doing. Neither is wrong from a purely business POV, but that doesn't necessarily make it okay. I like to think that society is not all about business.
Right, it's not all about business.
I go there to relax and unwind from my weekly three night work ordeal, it's like therapy, I swear. I love that couch. And the girls who sit with me are getting a break from the grind, for as long as they want it, and a cool drink while they are there. If they want to tip the girl onstage for me, they know it'll come back to them, plus it makes them look good to the guys (quite often they will get taken into private dance from this). They know I am also in the business and am not there to get dances but to chill out. Everything is out in the open, no games.
They can go do dances and come back when they are done, if they feel like it. I am NOT keeping them from making money from other guys--in fact I will point out guys entering the club 'Incoming' 'Attack!', etc.
While it's true this might irritate some customers, I don't care. They could do exactly what I am doing and have the girls sitting with them in a couch as well.
In fact, last night after posting that, I went in there and two of the couches were taken, and the guys had girls with them. I have no idea who was getting paid what, nor did I care. I got another one and relaxed as usual. The girls who knew me, and wanted a break, took it.
KS_Stevia
12-15-2010, 08:51 PM
do so, and that neither customer is obliged to have any consideration for the other.
That all said, I do get annoyed when some fuckhead waltzes into the club like he owns the joint, during a busy time, goes straight over to a popular dancer bear-hugs her for a minute of "intimate" greeting like they are sweethearts, or making some deal, takes her to his table to buy her drinks and chat about God knows what for some indefinite period before going for one or two LDs with her. Technically if she's with it he's in the right, but these guys always look to me like they are marking out territory and giving all the other customers the big finger, though I doubt they are sparing much conscious thought for them.
So fucking what. Its her choice. If she doesn't want to make money and wants to hang out in the "cool spot" with Djoser, there are plenty of girls who are hustling to earn your business. Case in point, myself. I was never a groupie for the Djoser type (bless his heart, my friend). But if I had been working 6 days straight and I wanted to chill for a while without hustling with a friend like Djoser, then who the fuck is going to tell me to do otherwise, even at the expense of more income?
Seriously dude, you're barking up the stump of a tree. Its all up to the dancer. And if the dancer you want is with Djoser...well get out of your oneism state and choose another dancer..or take your money home with you.
Djoser
12-17-2010, 03:15 AM
So fucking what. Its her choice. If she doesn't want to make money and wants to hang out in the "cool spot" with Djoser, there are plenty of girls who are hustling to earn your business. Case in point, myself. I was never a groupie for the Djoser type (bless his heart, my friend). But if I had been working 6 days straight and I wanted to chill for a while without hustling with a friend like Djoser, then who the fuck is going to tell me to do otherwise, even at the expense of more income?
It's mutual, you are more like a sister/most excellent friend, I wouldn't want it to be a groupie thing anyway. The dancers sitting with me aren't necessarily groupie types, as you say (though there is chemistry with some of them it is true). They are there to chill, for the most part. They know that's why I am there too. If one of them and happen to click, well that's even better. But basically I am there for the couch and the company, not to try and pick up. Usually I have worked with one or more of them in another club anyway; generally the way we relate is not as customer/dancer.
They will make more money in the long run if they are happy and comfortable at work. Sometimes that means taking a break. I have always thought that the typical dancer will make more money in the long run working 4 nights a week than 5, and taking a break once in a while during the night as well.
And as I said, if I see guys who look like prospects I will tell the dancers. Like if a guy is staring at one of them a lot and she isn't picking up on it, I'll tell her she maybe ought to try talking to him. I literally can't count the times I have done this.
But getting back to the topic, strictly defined, I think there could be some situations where approaching a table (or at the bar, more likely) where a customer is with a dancer would be OK. But it's not something I would ever do, and it's something that should be handled with extreme discretion. Especially in the rougher clubs!
Hopper
12-17-2010, 05:23 AM
And if I am then so what? IMO it is better that I wait, or choose another girl if I can't wait, then chase after a dancer that is sitting with another customer. As yoda pointed out, you have no idea what's happening over there and you could be putting the dancer in a bad spot.
LIke I said, I wouldn't ordinarily go over there myself and interrupt. Certainly not just a couple of minutes after the dancer sat down. I don't know how it would be putting the dancer in a "spot" though - I'm just asking, and she can say no. Most dancers here have commented that they would welcome it.
So I'm not "chasing" the dancer, I am just relaying my interest. As you say, I have no idea what the situation is, so I have to ask. (I'm talking about doing it through staff here, not in person.)
I've used the bartender a few times over the years, but that has almost always been in unique circumstances. Sometimes it resulted in the girl coming over and sometimes not. C'est la vie. But under no circumstances would I go to her directly and interrupt.
And label it as impatient, desperate, or whatever, but someone who needs a dance so much with that particular dancer at that moment that he is willing to bust in while she is dealing with another customer does come off as needy. Opinions may differ, but with some of the girls that I deal with that perception would hinder me a great deal in some of my activities. Now if your one and only interest is a couple of lapdances then you may not care, but there it is.
It's not that I need a dance right at that moment, it's that ten other customers could book her if I wait and then I'll be "needing a dance" with her for the rest of the night. I don't want to hang around in a SC for hours waiting for a girl - that might look bad too. I want to go there, get what I want and leave.
I don't care what the dancer thinks of it. I don't see why she would think anything of it. It's a strip club and I want a LD - what is there to think about? I don't see why she would care about anything but my money. I'm not a pushover or a sap, so that's how she'll size me up. She's doing business and I want her business - not later, not tomorrow night, not after some petty "sizing up" or pretend GF b/s - right away or within a reasonable time. If I were to act interested in anything besides LDs in a strip club, such as what she thinks about me, then I should worry about her perception of me. Ironic isn't it.
Hopper
12-17-2010, 05:38 AM
Right, it's not all about business.
I go there to relax and unwind from my weekly three night work ordeal, it's like therapy, I swear. I love that couch. And the girls who sit with me are getting a break from the grind, for as long as they want it, and a cool drink while they are there. If they want to tip the girl onstage for me, they know it'll come back to them, plus it makes them look good to the guys (quite often they will get taken into private dance from this). They know I am also in the business and am not there to get dances but to chill out. Everything is out in the open, no games.
By "not all about business" I meant customers don't have to think only of what interests themselves and what they are entitled to. I am entitled to go over and interrupt a conversation between a dancer and a customer, but others here say that's being a fuckhead and although I wouldn't go that far, I would avoid doing it myself. But from a purely business POV, it's okay.
They can go do dances and come back when they are done, if they feel like it. I am NOT keeping them from making money from other guys--in fact I will point out guys entering the club 'Incoming' 'Attack!', etc.
Okay so you are not keeping them from doing LDs and you even said earlier customers can come over to ask for LDs. But I can still understand other customers being irritated because while they are sitting on your couch, they are not actively mingling, i.e. working the room. I can't necessarily decide from across the room whether I like one of the dancers on your couch and not all of them are going to do a stage show in the time I am in the club, so I won't necessarily see them there either (or be able to tip them there to let them know I'm interested).
Ironically, this whole topic came up because some customers want to "mingle" uninterrupted instead of going straight for dances, or even going at all.
I suppose it depends on how long each dancer is spending over at your couch relative to how long the other customers are in the club for. Irritating other customers is bad for business - for the dancers and the club. They need breaks like all of us do at work. If the dancers are at your couch for just the average length of time they might spend with other customers then maybe it isn't an issue. But customers are going to see one guy with a bunch of girls all to himself.
While it's true this might irritate some customers, I don't care. They could do exactly what I am doing and have the girls sitting with them in a couch as well.
In fact, last night after posting that, I went in there and two of the couches were taken, and the guys had girls with them. I have no idea who was getting paid what, nor did I care. I got another one and relaxed as usual. The girls who knew me, and wanted a break, took it.
That's not why I go.
Hopper
12-17-2010, 05:54 AM
So fucking what. Its her choice. If she doesn't want to make money and wants to hang out in the "cool spot" with Djoser, there are plenty of girls who are hustling to earn your business. Case in point, myself. I was never a groupie for the Djoser type (bless his heart, my friend). But if I had been working 6 days straight and I wanted to chill for a while without hustling with a friend like Djoser, then who the fuck is going to tell me to do otherwise, even at the expense of more income?
Seriously dude, you're barking up the stump of a tree. Its all up to the dancer. And if the dancer you want is with Djoser...well get out of your oneism state and choose another dancer..or take your money home with you.
That passage you quoted wasn't aimed at djoser, nor was the post it is from a response to one of djoser's posts. I don't know why you are connecting the two, dude.
We weren't talking about what the dancers should do, we were talking about consideration for the other customer. Some customers here think interrupting a conversation between a dancer and another customer is fucking over the other guy. I'm just saying to them that I also don't go to SCs to watch dancers sit and talk to other customers. So if those customers don't like me interrupting that, TFB.
I don't choose the dancers you like, I choose the ones I like. Even if I've already had LDs from ten other dancers that night, I won't like it if another dancer I like is "chilling" over at some other guy's table for half an hour instead of mingling so I don't get to meet her. It's not "oneism".
I don't expect to get everything I like, obviously somebody always has to miss out. I'm not demanding everything be my way. But I'm entitled to do what I can to get my way, like everyone else. I took some of my time to come to the club and also paid at the door just to get in. I also don't have all night. If there are too many dancers "chilling" with customers it's going to hold me up or cause me to go without.
I'm not speaking against paid conversation, I'm just saying that if you do take the cheap route and pay her to talk to you at your table instead of in the LD area, which means you can go for a lot longer, then cut the rest of us a break and let us get LDs. There doesn't need to be a conflict between the two.
None of this is aimed at djoser, because he doesn't stop customers from asking for LDs from the dancers with him. Except I wouldn't be happy with dancers just sitting with one guy for any great length of time, since it means I don't get to meet them so that I can decide whether I do want them.
I have had dancers sit and talk to me way past their hustle time. Sometimes they weren't hustling at all, just taking time out and looking busy. One time I had the hottest dancer in the club sit and talk to me for almost two hours because she didn't want to work that night. I tipped her well for it anyway (because I was enjoying it) and offered her drinks (she declined). I also bought an LD from her, so she eventually did start working. If other customers had approached her while she was with me, I wouldn't have wet my pants over it. She doesn't belong to me and nor am I that needy.
Hopper
12-17-2010, 06:04 AM
...
They will make more money in the long run if they are happy and comfortable at work. Sometimes that means taking a break. I have always thought that the typical dancer will make more money in the long run working 4 nights a week than 5, and taking a break once in a while during the night as well.
Everyone needs work breaks but in the case of strippers there are quiet and busy times in each shift, and the breaks should be during the quiet times. I don't know what dancers do for breaks in my clubs, but it seems they usually do it by sitting and chatting to a customer, who might buy her a drink. Sometimes they head off to the dressing room or outside of the club for a meal. I've had dancers sit with me for this reason and I use it to talk to them about their work and the club, because it helps me to know this stuff. In return I buy them drinks and tip them for their time, regardless of whether I am interested in them for LDs.
And as I said, if I see guys who look like prospects I will tell the dancers. Like if a guy is staring at one of them a lot and she isn't picking up on it, I'll tell her she maybe ought to try talking to him. I literally can't count the times I have done this.
This would creep me out a little. I don't want some other guy watching me in the club and directing the dancers. I want to interact directly with the dancers. I know all the dancers and other staff are going to be watching me, but another customer? A bit disconcerting.
But getting back to the topic, strictly defined, I think there could be some situations where approaching a table (or at the bar, more likely) where a customer is with a dancer would be OK. But it's not something I would ever do, and it's something that should be handled with extreme discretion. Especially in the rougher clubs!
Agreed.
Djoser
12-17-2010, 02:57 PM
Everyone needs work breaks but in the case of strippers there are quiet and busy times in each shift, and the breaks should be during the quiet times.
The breaks should be when they need a break. ;D
Once in a while the shit will get to me so much I have to go sit down for literally 30 seconds in the dressing room, or better yet go outside for a minute--just to clear my head. It doesn't matter how busy it is, I need it right then. I'd love to take longer than that, but the songs are 3 minutes or less and I can't.
I did that last night, in fact (went outside for about 30 seconds).
In return I buy them drinks and tip them for their time, regardless of whether I am interested in them for LDs.
Aha! You are doing the same thing that I am, pretty much--except I do it on a big comfortable couch, which helps them stay longer I suspect. They will like you for this, trust me.
This would creep me out a little. I don't want some other guy watching me in the club and directing the dancers. I want to interact directly with the dancers. I know all the dancers and other staff are going to be watching me, but another customer? A bit disconcerting.
Oh it's not like I am watching the customers nonstop, not with a bunch of dancers sitting around me. :D
But I do watch the club to some extent. The guys I tell them to go talk to have no clue I mentioned it to the girl. You also have to remember I am in the business. I do that when I am DJing as well. It's good for the dancers, it's good for the customers (provided it wasn't a false alarm, or the guy was just staring but didn't want a dance). Everybody's happy!
You are over analyzing this, I think. But you seem like a good guy.
KS_Stevia
12-17-2010, 11:27 PM
This would creep me out a little. I don't want some other guy watching me in the club and directing the dancers. I want to interact directly with the dancers. I know all the dancers and other staff are going to be watching me, but another customer? A bit disconcerting.
When you work in the industry a while, noticing potential prey is almost second nature. I am always seeing ripe PL's drooling over the strippers that spend time with me when I go in as a custy. Djoser has been working this industry a while, it doesn't take much effort to take note of a tongue hanging down to the ground when doing a casual crowd scan.
Not all strippers are workaholics, or even hard workers. Lots enjoy the easy come, easy go party lifestyle. They love working in the nightlife. They aren't thinking about maximizing their income on a busy night with lots of prospective buyers. They just made their month's bills the night before. Hence, a stripper will take a break when she feels like it. And she'll sometimes come to work and not feel like hustling. Burn out can cause this too.
There are no rules and requirements for strippers to constantly mingle, or do anything really...unless its a very small club, or a show club, or has micro managers.
Maybe that helps Hopper. Ultimately I do agree with you, nothing really wrong with interrupting a custy and dancer as long as you do it politely and not when they are in the middle of a dance or in a private champ room type environment.
Montrealais
04-04-2011, 10:23 AM
you may interupt me at anytime ;-)
you could always send over your waitress (any other employee really)
wish there were more customers like you!!!
This. If I'm interested and she's seemingly stuck with someone more interested in chatting I'll send the waitress (and tip her accordingly). It just seems a civilized way to go about it, and if the other guy is feeling territorial it makes it less likely I'm going to have to fend him off with chair and bullwhip until the bouncer steps in.
Plus, if he's a regular or her boyfriend, chances are the waitress may clue me in.