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View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....



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hyori
04-09-2015, 07:13 PM
This is not uncommon among the middle-aged or older men who are biased against sex industry. They come to a camming/escort site thinking: "Since she's a whore, noone probably wants to date leave alone marry her. I'm in my 40's/50's/60's and she sleeps with rich old men all the time so she might think I'm rich too - and all whores dream of marrying rich. She'll be kissing my ass when I tell I want to make her my wifey! Also, she definitely knows how to fuck and will be fucking me like crazy out of gratitude for giving her a chance and to make sure I don't change my mind. Flawless strategy!"

LMAO!!!! My tummy muscles hurt from laughing so hard at this...fuck I am still in snort mode.

audritwo
04-09-2015, 08:44 PM
Lowballer: Will you shave your pussy for me?
Me: Do you have $5,000 for me to do so?
Lowballer: Really?
Me: Dead serious, I got to make up for lost revenue.
Lowballer: How about 30?
Me: $30,000? Well of course, I like the way you barter. You are so generous!
He left.

bbwbrianna
04-09-2015, 11:03 PM
I really regret giving MFC another chance. More begging and stupidity. Morons telling me I would make more money if I would just sit topless in free chat. I managed to squeeze 50 tokens out of some old guy to look watch him jack off on cam but even that was a struggle. I watched him for 7 minutes, he was shoving a cucumber up his ass. I lost out on making money because he wouldn't cum so I got bored and left. No more of this shit. No more PW shows on Chaturbate, no more viewing cams, I always lose money because these cock jockeys expect me to stay with them all day for shitty pay. Take me private twat socks! Meanwhile in the land of StreamMate:

BuffaloBillwannabe: It puts the lotion on it's skin, it does this when it is told
BuffaloBillwannabe: It places the lotion in the basket
BuffaloBillwannabe: PUT THE FUCKING LOTION IN THE BASKET
BuffaloBillwannabe: precioussss
Me: 0_0

lollydollie
04-09-2015, 11:53 PM
this was all in free chat, which I never have opened while streaming.

Quantumm: hey baby
good how are you
why are you stripping on a webcam? Ill pick you up and you can live in my mansion.
Jesus, thats no way for a lady to live.

and then we have his guy;

Bonobos: how the fuck
are you looking at the camera
when i go in
does no one want to look at your ugly ass
thats why you feel special when someone joins
you stupid cunt
if you can read this stand on the bed
flip me off
u stupid cunt
Bonobos: your a fucking dirty cunt put the middle finger at me
you little disgusting whore
u fucking dike


haha -_____- dumbass.

Marina Starr
04-10-2015, 07:26 AM
Funny as fuck!

Happy Jack: is that an alien tattoo on your arm?
Marina: It's SURE is.
Happy Jack: reminded me of my ex-wife.
41351


http://i158.photobucket.com/albums/t94/tsmelania/2q9w80j_zps264a8555.gif (http://s158.photobucket.com/user/tsmelania/media/2q9w80j_zps264a8555.gif.html)

SimoneGray
04-10-2015, 07:32 AM
^^ I just burst out laughing, that is funny AF. Day made, thank you!

Marina Starr
04-10-2015, 07:38 AM
Made mine too! I still can't stop laughing when I think of it!
http://i158.photobucket.com/albums/t94/tsmelania/k32kd2_zps6ab6701f.gif (http://s158.photobucket.com/user/tsmelania/media/k32kd2_zps6ab6701f.gif.html)

^^ I just burst out laughing, that is funny AF. Day made, thank you!

CatBBW
04-10-2015, 07:42 AM
Lowballer: Will you shave your pussy for me?
Me: Do you have $5,000 for me to do so?
Lowballer: Really?
Me: Dead serious, I got to make up for lost revenue.
Lowballer: How about 30?
Me: $30,000? Well of course, I like the way you barter. You are so generous!
He left.

Yep, I do this too! But the bartering made yours extra-special :D

AngelicaFox
04-10-2015, 03:47 PM
him: you the girl very cat my love

he just keeps repeating this. I told him the translation doesn't improve with repetition but whatevs...

LaLaLaLazer
04-10-2015, 03:59 PM
My MFC profile says something to the effect of "If you need me to be bossy, I can do that, for a price." I was making a face at one of the freeloading "bb" guys, when this smartie rolls in and immediately begins…

Smartie: She looks bored.
Me: Yeah, thanks for talking about me in third person…
Smartie: Well, you're the boss, I'm the narrator.
Me: (smirk)
Smartie: She's not even that bossy.
Me: You have to pay for that.
Smartie: You're mean.
Smartie: Bitch. (leaves)

Kitcatt
04-10-2015, 04:38 PM
*Using a rabbit in a pvt*
Him: Stick it all in
Me: It is all in
Him: No, down to base, put the thing that goes on clit in pussy

ummm, yeah, no...

SweetJulia
04-10-2015, 06:13 PM
going to a cam/escort site for dating demonstrates a failure to grasp reality on par with thinking that if you have a consultation for a kidney transplant that the Doctor is going to give you his own kidney.

So gonna use this for a signature!

justanothercamgirl
04-11-2015, 04:30 AM
This is not uncommon among the middle-aged or older men who are biased against sex industry. They come to a camming/escort site thinking: "Since she's a whore, noone probably wants to date leave alone marry her. I'm in my 40's/50's/60's and she sleeps with rich old men all the time so she might think I'm rich too - and all whores dream of marrying rich. She'll be kissing my ass when I tell I want to make her my wifey! Also, she definitely knows how to fuck and will be fucking me like crazy out of gratitude for giving her a chance and to make sure I don't change my mind. Flawless strategy!"

Strangely enough it isn't just middle-aged and older men. I had a young solider once write me this long and heart-felt message about how that he and I were perfect for each other because our 'career choices' made it hard for other people to get close to us and love us.

But hey, it is all part and parcel of the fantasy that makes us money.....right?

Sunnylexie
04-11-2015, 07:11 AM
Strangely enough it isn't just middle-aged and older men. I had a young solider once write me this long and heart-felt message about how that he and I were perfect for each other because our 'career choices' made it hard for other people to get close to us and love us.

But hey, it is all part and parcel of the fantasy that makes us money.....right?

Too bad these broken-hearted guys who want to get close end up spamming us with their contacts far more often than buying private time to get to know us.

@snowdahlia These guys who pretend they have a fatal desease to get pity sex are full of shit. I saw people with actual cancer, and believe me maintaining erection was the last thing they'd care about.
The worst thing about it that they make us biased against everyone who says to have some sort of severe condition while the actual disabled people are a pleasure to work with (maybe it's my luck but I've never had issues with any of my disabled or terminally ill customers)

DancesWithSloths
04-11-2015, 12:20 PM
I've just transferred to daily pay, so I have the new girl status for now. I hopped on for an hour while the coast was clear from house guests this afternoon, and it was like a crate of dicks broke open over my head.

One specimen, I'm sure we've all experienced his like:

41390

I didn't ban him because I was busy doing an oily flash; just as I was finished with that, I got whisked off into pvt. About a minute in he pops into pvt, sees that I'm still fully dressed and pops back out again. Fine, I thought, I'll write to support to get him banned for abusing the preview.

But I didn't have to! As soon as I'm back into free chat, he's back: "He bb, do you remember my request? Make me hard for pvt."

LOL *ban*

I don't recall being actually new was so annoying, maybe my fuse has become shorter.

caramelDip
04-11-2015, 01:26 PM
Shout out to the dudes that don't wanna tip for ass/boobs.... so they TRY to take you private for under 30 secs...but their dumbasses don't know how to estimate and ends up staying 31-40 seconds because we wait to show ANYTHING

Gotta be smarter than that.

lailianasahara
04-11-2015, 02:10 PM
Idiot: Did you used to be a man?
Me: Heh what? No, why would you ask that?
Idiot: Well your tits are too big to be real.

Please tell me where this logic comes from? I'm on the smaller end of the big tit spectrum, but yes they are real. SMH.

Also has anyone gotten "worhipful holy of holiest cock" yet? I should have screenied that one.

Tsepmet1
04-11-2015, 05:16 PM
^ I got him!

DancesWithSloths
04-11-2015, 05:41 PM
Idiot: Did you used to be a man?
Me: Heh what? No, why would you ask that?
Idiot: Well your tits are too big to be real.

Please tell me where this logic comes from?

He was probably trying to neg you - textbook example: pick a feature you must be proud of and put you down for it. Pick-up artists are the scum if the earth.

miss_sub
04-12-2015, 09:36 AM
milkyboy88:hi do u slap ur tits hard

miss_submisv:yep

miss_submisv:25 tokens a slap

milkyboy88:sorry mam i don have that im realy liitle boy with less tokens

miss_submisv:then get lost.

milkyboy88:thank u

miss_sub
04-12-2015, 10:32 AM
why dont we do a passworf pvt
miss_submisv:
that way i am allowed to fist and piss
miss_submisv:
and enema
backatitagain69:
pvt on 12
backatitagain69:
n we do all those
backatitagain69:
?
miss_submisv:
no thank you that is way too low. I do extreme anal. have a good day. I am not interested in doing all of those things on a regular private because I will get banned.


backatitagain69:
y
miss_submisv:
Leave me alone. It is too cheap and I am not interested in getting banned so that you can get a cheap show. Get lost.


backatitagain69:
so
backatitagain69:
in pass show?
miss_submisv:
yes a password show. 800 tokens for a half hour. unlimited anal stretching gaping fisting enema, piss play, ass to mouth, anything goes that is legal man.

leaves

Smurfette
04-12-2015, 03:15 PM
dude: can i see your belly button
dude: can you show me your sexy belly button
dude: can i see your belly button
dude: can you show me your belly button
dude: can i see your sexy belly button now
me: no
dude: ok can i see your belly button soon

LOL.

miss_sub
04-12-2015, 06:25 PM
miss_submisv:what ru into for tonight?

omega_titan tipped 50 tokens -- this is because i like your face !

miss_submisv:thanks hub

miss_submisv:hun

omega_titan:i gave u one :)

miss_submisv:u tipped me 50 tokens

miss_submisv:u didnt give me an offer

omega_titan:the 50 was i like your face. i voted u a thumbs up 4 your satisfied percentage

omega_titan:u do have great tits btw :)

omega_titan:so my 50 meant nothing?

miss_submisv:well i do 1000 tiken shows

miss_submisv:token shows

miss_submisv:im not taking requests for two dollars and fifty cents



omega_titan:your not understanding. i tipped you 50 JUST for your face. Meaning i wanted to see nothing else 4 the 50. it was me just paying u a compliment.

omega_titan:thats all..

omega_titan:You're*

omega_titan:you have a beautiful face ...heres 50 tokens

miss_submisv:Ok thanks for the 50 tokens.

Vlodina
04-13-2015, 07:35 AM
nice boobs
can you show your pussy to i see it is fake??

DancesWithSloths
04-13-2015, 07:59 AM
can you show your pussy to i see it is fake??

OMG, I'm crying. What, are you meant to have a blow-up doll contraption in your pants to fool men on camsites?

Violet_Z
04-13-2015, 09:18 AM
If I buy your panties can I get them today?

Vlodina
04-13-2015, 10:03 AM
OMG, I'm crying. What, are you meant to have a blow-up doll contraption in your pants to fool men on camsites?

Maybe one of these?? http://www.stockroom.com/Original-Vee-String-Vagina-Prosthesis-P2849.aspx

DancesWithSloths
04-13-2015, 10:38 AM
^^Huh, that looks pretty tasteful! Though I don't see them coming into vogue on SM :)

SimoneGray
04-13-2015, 12:00 PM
"you should date me bb, you will get a big dick everyday."

Why oh why do these pitiful men think that their cocks are such a gift!?

Prussia
04-13-2015, 12:08 PM
"you should date me bb, you will get a big dick everyday."

Why oh why do these pitiful men think that their cocks are such a gift!?

Because they literally have nothing else to offer. That's why they offer their dick, and when doing so they only describe the size. Aside from being pathetic in attempt to impress you with their penis, they all think that a dick needs to be to be impressive is the size and nothing more; incapable of grasping the basic concept that it's the "sighs" not "size" that matter.

Sunnylexie
04-13-2015, 07:37 PM
Idiot: you need a bigger toy
will satisfy you better

FFS if most my toys are in a certain size it means it's the size I prefer not that bigger toys are unavailable in my area.

caramelDip
04-13-2015, 08:39 PM
Two different guys on the same day:


1. I don't pay for nothing in the blind sorry not a trick. *Then get tf off the site*

2. So this how this works? U just sit there like a fish in a bowl? *Yes, its in my job description*

Violet_Z
04-14-2015, 07:51 AM
Idiot in free chat:"Oh bb! OH BB! you're so hot sitting there that just looking at you made me cum!"

*kicks*

I bet guy is just great in bed if looking at a fully couthed woman is too much.

Smurfette
04-14-2015, 11:22 AM
if you have a nice ass
we can go exclu
face and tits are good
dont be a whore

*ban*

seicento
04-15-2015, 04:53 PM
sm premium chat just now :
JayDaos has logged on
JayDaos: MMM.... LAY BACK AND SHOW ME YOUR VAGINA
OK SORRY YOU DONT SHOW ME WHAT I ASK
that all lasted 1m 2s
seriously ?

bbwbrianna
04-15-2015, 08:19 PM
Ughhhh. This fuckhead on CB claims I'm not responding to his PM's when I AM. This has happened twice, I don't know if hes fucking with me, or if he accidentally put me on ignore. Either way he gets pissy if I don't respond within two seconds of him tipping me. And I wish these fuckheads with no credits would stop entering my room on ImLive. The whole purpose of free chat is so that paying members can see what they're buying. Stop abusing it and stop asking me to get my tits out. Why even go on a cam site if you're broke? My time is valuable so stop wasting it fuckheads! And the purples on CB need to stop staring at me and get the fuck out of my room if they're not gonna tip me. Way to be an asshole.

Serena-Shields
04-15-2015, 09:55 PM
[12:47:42 AM] idiot: your age?
[12:47:47 AM] Serena Shields: 20
[12:48:01 AM]idiot: lets cam show?
[12:48:10 AM] Serena Shields: Sorry, not available right now
[12:48:14 AM] Serena Shields: My rate is3/min
[12:48:36 AM] idiot: i'm sri lanka smart boy..
[12:48:43 AM] idiot: 20 years old
[12:48:53 AM] Serena Shields: My rate is 3$ a minute
[12:49:38 AM] idiot: -video-
[12:50:25 AM] Serena Shields: Are you going to pay 3$ a minute?
[12:50:38 AM] idiot.: i'm free
[12:51:03 AM] Serena Shields: Are you going to pay me?
[12:51:19 AM] idiot.: free
[12:51:25 AM] Serena Shields: No.
[12:51:27 AM] Serena Shields: Fuck off
[12:51:39 AM] idiot.: pleze
[12:51:51 AM] Serena Shields: NO
[12:51:56 AM] Serena Shields: THREE DOLLARS A MINUTE
[12:52:58 AM] idiot.: my dick is most beautiful in city..
[12:53:13 AM] Serena Shields: And money is more beautiful.

Jesus Christ.

miss_sub
04-16-2015, 12:07 AM
wealthyn20:I'm really interested in you

wealthyn20:Are you single?

miss_submisv:yup

miss_submisv:Are you interested in a show

wealthyn20:I'm interested in making this a real life thing

wealthyn20:Yes

wealthyn20:I wanna make you mine give you real money

miss_submisv:i dont want a real life thing sorry have a great night

wealthyn20:I wanna give you real money not tokens wher you only get so much of it

miss_submisv:sorry hun not interested in stealing from chaturbate. only want to do shows for tokens. goodbye.

bbwbrianna
04-16-2015, 12:12 AM
wealthyn20:I'm really interested in you

wealthyn20:Are you single?

miss_submisv:yup

miss_submisv:Are you interested in a show

wealthyn20:I'm interested in making this a real life thing

wealthyn20:Yes

wealthyn20:I wanna make you mine give you real money

miss_submisv:i dont want a real life thing sorry have a great night

wealthyn20:I wanna give you real money not tokens wher you only get so much of it

miss_submisv:sorry hun not interested in stealing from chaturbate. only want to do shows for tokens. goodbye.


Gotta love the greys who claim they can afford you in real life when they can't even buy a damn token package which costs $10 minimum. I always direct these guys to match.com if they want to talk to a woman without spending a dime.

Sunnylexie
04-16-2015, 05:49 AM
A semi reg asks if I have a wishlist. I direct him there, he leaves to return after like 10 minutes.
The dude: You have a great taste in clothing!
Me: Thanks)
The dude: I really loved that nun outfit
Me ... *seriously expecting him to tell he's ordered it because it's like $25*
The dude: hope someone buys it for you, I'd love to see you wearing it!

hyori
04-16-2015, 07:33 AM
A semi reg asks if I have a wishlist. I direct him there, he leaves to return after like 10 minutes.
The dude: You have a great taste in clothing!
Me: Thanks)
The dude: I really loved that nun outfit
Me ... *seriously expecting him to tell he's ordered it because it's like $25*
The dude: hope someone buys it for you, I'd love to see you wearing it!

I don't understand why they even ask for your wishlist if they have no intention of buying anything. Is it because they think we're stupid enough to have our address out in plain view?

I find that guys who do buy stuff actually never even ask where your list is in the first place.

HurricaneRed
04-16-2015, 10:19 AM
So this dude waltzes into my room and immediately, first thing he says in guest is 'damn, when i was here two years ago girls were only charging 2 and 3 dollars a minute. Have pussy and tits become that much better in two years?'

Me: Well, I wasn't here two years ago and I can't speak for other girls, but I'm definitely worth what I charge.

Dude: Didn't say you weren't! Why did you get all defensive and take it personally, I was just talking in general.

Me: I didn't take it personally. It was a really bad attempt at a neg, btw.

Dude: Yes you did!

Me: Well, let me ask you this. Why come into MY room and start talking shit about girls' prices if it has nothing to do with me? I don't understand why you're here. Doesn't sound like you want to have fun. Here, let me help you with that not-having-fun thing. (*KICK!*)

Sunnylexie
04-16-2015, 10:21 AM
I don't understand why they even ask for your wishlist if they have no intention of buying anything. Is it because they think we're stupid enough to have our address out in plain view?

I find that guys who do buy stuff actually never even ask where your list is in the first place.

They see it as a sort of "coming soon" advertisement. You know, "Stuff Daddy's gonna buy me so I can have even more fun with my horny fans!"

Smurfette
04-16-2015, 02:26 PM
are you a good little slut
i want you take bend over so i can see your ass
and slip thos panties off
and tough yourself. slow
im not paying if i dont get to look first
no used cars

...What?

Issabelle
04-16-2015, 03:18 PM
Justified: why american women rates are so hugh, do you have a pusssy made of fucking gold
Me: no, we just hate cheap bastards who can't spell.
Justified has been blocked.

QueenBitch
04-16-2015, 11:50 PM
Idiot: you need a bigger toy
will satisfy you better

FFS if most my toys are in a certain size it means it's the size I prefer not that bigger toys are unavailable in my area.

they are so obsessed with big toys and it's almost always the guys who aren't very polite. I don't get the obsession. Your dick is not that big.

god if only I'd get sph guys all day long.

stormi
04-17-2015, 01:49 PM
I was super fortunate to have a streamate "manager" come into my room the other night!41424 http://i.imgur.com/512wLDx.jpg?1

He went on to tell me exactly what I was doing wrong and said he'd be back later. I'm so lucky to have this kind of guidance from higher ups;D

QueenBitch
04-17-2015, 02:37 PM
I was super fortunate to have a streamate "manager" come into my room the other night!41424 http://i.imgur.com/512wLDx.jpg?1

He went on to tell me exactly what I was doing wrong and said he'd be back later. I'm so lucky to have this kind of guidance from higher ups;D

lol how stupid do they think we are? like anyone from support would write skyyppee

Procrasturbator
04-17-2015, 07:46 PM
(He asked for a preview, I told him my terms)

[7:32:08 PM] Him: ah
[7:32:16 PM] Him: i always like ot check it
[7:32:37 PM] Him: just because a couple of times, i paid for a show,a nd the it didn't work, and i never got my money back
[7:32:55 PM] Him: and they got all my personal into because of my paypal (lol, no shit)
[7:33:07 PM] Me: That's why I offer a $3 preview. If it doesn't work then you've only lost out on $3. I also don't take paypal, so.
[7:33:39 PM] Him: nevermind then :) but thank you anyway...maybe another time if circumstances change? x
[7:35:05 PM] Me: Ok, I can only keep paying clients on my list but feel free to add me again in the future if you can pay through the site :)
[7:35:39 PM] Him: just keep me on
[7:35:52 PM] Him: i won't message you unless i want a show
[7:35:59 PM] Him: i will forget you otherwise!
[7:36:12 PM] Him: and someone else will get my buesiness instead of you

You know, if it wasn't for that last part I might have considered it (even with the free preview/Paypal bs--I've been able to talk enough of those guys into doing things my way that I'm pretty lenient with them.) But that manipulative, "work for my money" bullshit doesn't fucking fly with me, especially from a guy who's oh so worried about losing out on $3.

hyori
04-17-2015, 07:58 PM
^^ wow you are patient. I just ban at any mention of Paypal. I even set my Skyprivate limit at $20 and I got one today. Wish so bad I could kick them in both heads.