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View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....



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Serena-Shields
05-30-2015, 02:58 PM
''Hi, did you want a show?''

''Yes''

''Okay my rate is 3$/min''

''No pay just show''

ARE YOU KIDDING ME EKJGWREGWGFOIWUEGKJEGFOWI

PrincessfromHell
05-30-2015, 03:36 PM
When they refer to having pvts with webmodels as having a relationship.
It is so funny I can't even comment on that crap....

Issabelle
05-30-2015, 04:44 PM
Idiot: would love to 'get on' you for the evening
those lips mmmmmm
they should be their own category of fruit
you doin gold shows?
Me: that's the weirdest pick up line I've ever heard and no, I never do gold shows. ...Well, actually, I do, but the buy in is like $20.
Idiot: c-ya wouldnt wanna be ya

If the come back is any indicator, he was definitely a 12 year old boy whose testicles had just dropped. Oi vey.

SimoneGray
05-30-2015, 05:07 PM
"Hey bb, can you sell me a jar of your female sperm?"

Um...wut...

audritwo
05-30-2015, 05:09 PM
Couldn't but think of this:

41781

Probably they think this is an actual thing girls do?

God, her home must reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! At least jar it crazy lady.

pippapippa
05-31-2015, 04:06 AM
You guys are so quiet.


internet philosopher: silence is a sign of folks here beingintimidated by beauty

Yep, so that's it. Everyone's just intimidated by my beauty.

Issabelle
05-31-2015, 05:49 AM
'Lover sperm' dude came back this morning. It's been like two days bro. How did you forget you've already tried to troll me?

pippapippa
05-31-2015, 05:56 AM
'Lover sperm' dude came back this morning. It's been like two days bro. How did you forget you've already tried to troll me?

Also had him again. He's really making the rounds.

Littleangel1
05-31-2015, 06:30 AM
"If you show me your tits here u me pvt for 90 hours"
After I told him to take me pvt first he kept insisting he would take me pvt for 90 HOURS....right....you're going to take me pvt for almost four days.... I just can't sometimes

Also this is my first time reading this thread and I love it all!

SimoneGray
05-31-2015, 04:32 PM
Idiot: you know bb, we should date. I could teach you a lot about how to cam properly you know, how to up your hustle.

Me: No thanks. I don't need to up my hustle, you need to up your bank account.

Sunnylexie
05-31-2015, 10:13 PM
God, her home must reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek! At least jar it crazy lady.
It looks pretty much like something a mentally disturbed character by Palahniuk would do. That said, if I ever go totally crazy and want to make a collection of used condoms I'll store them in a fridge rather then pin them onto the walls of my bedroom to decay.

LeoLeonora
05-31-2015, 10:43 PM
Loser: Hi Miss Piggy
Me: Maybe if your wallet were as fat as I am, you would be less bitter.

pippapippa
06-01-2015, 12:10 AM
smallpenis40: im a sexoffender


In case anyone wants to block this dick once he comes in your room. I'm sure he's full of it, but not even worth it.

pippapippa
06-01-2015, 02:49 AM
soiwannaseeu
imfineandu?
afteristhenimeetandhuguhard
mymissingstartedtogoninurheart
cava
bonsour
ichliebedich
tiamo
isiteru
waaini
=iloveu
iseeulikawesome
immerely

hyori
06-01-2015, 09:22 AM
^^ One handed lazy typer. There is such a thing as voice recognition...it's pitiful how few guys use it.

SweetLilyRaven
06-01-2015, 09:46 AM
alex235 : hello
alex235 : i do not have chip i good
alex235 : i new here
alex235 : i am middlehandcap i never seen tity in my life honest
alex235 : well you be my first pair

Seriously? This is a new low...

euro_princess
06-01-2015, 11:43 AM
I was fucking eating a piece of fucking cake online, cause is my bday (said in the fucking fuck description who nobody gives a shit reading). And then a big crowd of neanderthals comes and asks multiple times to see my boobs. Like whaaat?

http://38.media.tumblr.com/1ed7513a61461df6e467675c128287a2/tumblr_no5fazdcpn1r5tymxo1_500.gif

Issabelle
06-01-2015, 01:35 PM
The weirdo who comes in saying 'cluck cluck' and 'I'm a chicken' is apparently still making the rounds. Showed up in my room this morning. Oi vey... *eye roll*

Marina Starr
06-01-2015, 02:10 PM
Today in free chat:

pales: canu b my daddy? cuz im a faggot

Marina: I'm not a man. Can't help you with daddy issues. Bye gurrrrl!

AnotherLily
06-01-2015, 09:16 PM
Not heard on cam just a fantasy from Imdead

Subject:no shy bitches nasty hardcore sluts only

looking for hardcore nasty filthy sluts who talk sound and act like pornstars, but who dont charge like one, not lookin to be a money slave u dumb bitches

... good luck with that buddy.

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
06-03-2015, 07:49 PM
Him: Can I take you out for some coffee *wink wink*
Me: Sure if Coffee is code for a long private show, then sure I LOVE COFFEE

PrincessfromHell
06-04-2015, 12:39 AM
C'mon, doll, Fantasies! I read them to get some giggles.
My fave was serial poster: Looking for a model to tease me in a freechat, not begging for private. Even when I just read this I want to punch him in da fucking face.
They have jerked off their very last brain cells. Period.


Not heard on cam just a fantasy from Imdead

Subject:no shy bitches nasty hardcore sluts only

looking for hardcore nasty filthy sluts who talk sound and act like pornstars, but who dont charge like one, not lookin to be a money slave u dumb bitches

... good luck with that buddy.

nattyfetish
06-04-2015, 02:04 AM
"On my computer the private button doesn't work " .... I started to laugh my ass off and than kicked him out!:O Evan other members were laughing lol

pippapippa
06-04-2015, 05:28 AM
41829



Really can't say the idea of a cunt hickey is terribly appealing.

Issabelle
06-04-2015, 06:19 PM
41829

Really can't say the idea of a cunt hickey is terribly appealing.

I've had one. They are not fun. Having the exterior of your genitals chafe is terrible and it will very likely hurt when you pee.

On the flip side, the enthusiasm my SO expressed received strong marks.

Girly_Girl
06-04-2015, 08:41 PM
wtf....a guy just came to my room...all he said was motor boat and that's it? I tried to get him to tell me what it was and all he said is....your suppose to know?...wow

euro_princess
06-04-2015, 09:23 PM
wtf....a guy just came to my room...all he said was motor boat and that's it? I tried to get him to tell me what it was and all he said is....your suppose to know?...wow

They usually say that about boobs. Like they want to put their head between your breats and make that motor boat sound.

Girly_Girl
06-04-2015, 09:34 PM
They usually say that about boobs. Like they want to put their head between your breats and make that motor boat sound.

lol...yeah I finally googled it

Procrasturbator
06-05-2015, 05:55 AM
Soo was up there
[5:24:30 AM] Me: Hey :) In a show, out in 10
[5:24:48 AM] "Her": love to show off :)
[5:36:16 AM] Me: Looking for a show?
[5:38:01 AM] "Her": Yay! some1 to talk to ! lol I'm a little forgetful lol, have we spoken before? ;)
[5:38:34 AM] Me: You guys really need to program these things better. Has anyone actually fallen for this?
[5:39:31 AM] "Her": hmm ok. Your username seemed familiar. lol its ok I was looking for someone to talk with, I hope you wanna chat with a bored single 23/f lol So what u up to?
[5:40:30 AM] Me: Have you considered becoming sentient and taking over the world? I mean if guys actually buy this then it can't be that hard
[5:41:06 AM] "Her": Hmmm well maybe I can spice up your week even more lol..what kind of girls are you into? you like nerdy girls?
[5:42:15 AM] Me: Lmfao, really? You think the girl in the pic looks like a nerdy girl? Jesus no wonder cam site traffic is so terrible, this is awful
[5:42:42 AM] "Her": (affiliate link)
[5:43:12 AM] Me: Are there actually people who click random links given to them on Skype?
[5:43:45 AM] "Her": lol you should know nerdy girls and redheads are the biggest freaks! ;) I have some free time now my roommate went out...i love to tease ;) Wanna see? its up to u...im in the mood lol
[5:44:24 AM] Me: ... The girl in the pic is neither ~nerdy nor a redhead. Is designing a convincing bot really that hard? You guys really need to get your act together.

I was pretty sure it was a bot at "love to show off" but I wanted to see how far it would go. I think I used up all of its lines :( The nerdy thing cracked me up though. If you're going to try and market a stereotype at least go all the way... the profile pic looks like Barbie.

IvyRose
06-05-2015, 09:41 AM
41833
Aww too bad he doesnt like it... my bankaccount is liking it though ::)

SimoneGray
06-05-2015, 10:00 AM
So I've been feeling super sick for a while and haven't been on cam in about 4 or so days. Log onto the site today and find this in my inbox from someone who has tipped me about $5 in the entire 3 months I've been on the site:

"Hi bb, just wanted to say I wonder where you are. You know its not good when you are not online, its bad for business. i think you need to read a book about sales. I am a salesman and I make high commissions every month and I did this by putting in time. something you clearly dont know how to do. Anyway, hope to see you soon, just some food for thought."

Ummm...EXCUSE ME!? Yea, I'll definitely listen to someone that's tipped me $5 over 3 months.

euro_princess
06-05-2015, 10:15 AM
Ifuckinghate idiots who give me free advices!!! Fuck off, little bastard.

SweetSienna
06-05-2015, 01:14 PM
Same here! I can't do the phone! It gives me SUPER anxiety lol

Issabelle
06-05-2015, 04:58 PM
This morning was one long line of broke idiots giving me advice or bitching about rates. Yes, that's how much I charge for private. Yes, that's how much I charge to see my (fucking amazing) pierced titties. No, you can't sit in my room and jerk off for free. No, I really don't care if you think I'm a bitch.

Somehow, the standard 'skype bb?' and 'lower price to $.99/minute just for me bb?' and 'tits/ass/feet/pussy flash for free bb?' shit only gets more annoying the more I hear it.

Whatever, still on track to have one of my highest earning periods on SM to date. *middle finger to the free loaders and haters*

SweetSienna
06-05-2015, 08:45 PM
Damn I guess I have just been lucky but I have not come across any retarded assholes that think impossible shit will give you an orgasm. I even told a bunch of guys that I can only get off in real life from a vibrator and they all seemed to think that was reasonable. I once told a guy that I could cum if I really tried and was really horny in about 4 minutes and he was really impressed and said that is very hard to do. I'm glad I'm on the site I'm on and not sm or MFC hah!

Classy_Katy
06-06-2015, 12:05 AM
Why do guys ask if we've been busy? To me it's like asking "are you earning any money?" and I find it really rude. Or do they like the thought that we've spent the last few hours in a sexual frenzy?

Sunnylexie
06-06-2015, 12:21 AM
Why do guys ask if we've been busy? To me it's like asking "are you earning any money?" and I find it really rude. Or do they like the thought that we've spent the last few hours in a sexual frenzy?

Also: "Am I the only one here?" or "How many guys are in here?" in free chat. Sounds like making sure I have nothing to do but entertain their bored ass.

SweetSienna
06-06-2015, 10:53 AM
All the guys I talk to on my site (naked.com) tell me that girls fake squirting by peeing and they know most women can't actually do it. God reading these comments makes me love my customers more and more hahah

audritwo
06-06-2015, 12:24 PM
So why is this an excuse not to join into shows?


Matt: i love girls with a bush too , damn sooo sexy
A2: Well if you love it so much, you should join in!
Matt: i already cummed once a bit ago
A2: Sooo just join in if you love it! Just come watch the fireworks
Matt: im very sorry :(
A2: Me too *Ban*


Seriously, if you finished, why are you still lurking?

TransdimensionalPrincess
06-06-2015, 12:34 PM
So why is this an excuse not to join into shows?


Matt: i love girls with a bush too , damn sooo sexy
A2: Well if you love it so much, you should join in!
Matt: i already cummed once a bit ago
A2: Sooo just join in if you love it! Just come watch the fireworks
Matt: im very sorry :(
A2: Me too *Ban*


Seriously, if you finished, why are you still lurking?

Perfect response "if you are only buying camshows to cum then you're doing it wrong"
Seriously..... if the only point is cumming then guys wouldn't buy shows, he really IS doing it wrong. Can't enjoy himself without getting hard? super super lame.

SaraLaughs
06-07-2015, 10:22 PM
Nothing over-specific, but holy hell what the fuck with all the fake-ass supposed 'subs' on SM? Most of them just want to waste my damn time endlessly, others are like, 'I have no limits whatsoever, do whatever the hell you want to me, I just want to please my mistress!" Then we do exclusive for 10 seconds, they turn on the camera for a nanosecond and then log off.

I've met one actual sub on SM in like the last several months. The rest seem to have no actual clue what being a sub even is.

Even better are the guys that are like 'oh I'm a dirty slave, you must punish me, show me your ass mistress!' In free of course, without tipping.

Sansa
06-07-2015, 10:35 PM
I spent one night watching MFC to see if it's something I'd be interested in, and I have to say - you girls have PATIENCE.:shocking:

EllieGold
06-07-2015, 11:50 PM
[email protected] to You: why should i pick u to takde private baby?
i mean i get ur sexy as fuck and all just wanna take someone worth iut and wont waste my time on her

First learn to spell "take", "it" and "Your".

Another...since when do I have to convince YOU??? Not car sales here yeesh.

bbwbrianna
06-08-2015, 04:26 PM
The grey idiots on CB who say shit like "I'm bored bye". Oooookay buddy you don't pay my bills. You don't contribute anything to me or the site, so therefore it doesn't matter if you go pull on your tiny dick somewhere else. Go chug a gallon of bleach and set yourself on fire for all I care. You're not paying me so you're not a valuable customer. And I hate fucktarded guys who tell me to fuck off because I won't respond to their pms. If these fucktards read the room rules they would know to tip me for a pm. You're not the first idiot that wants to "chat" and distract me from potential customers and you most certainly won't be the last. No skin off my tits.

bbwbrianna
06-09-2015, 05:14 PM
Kinda camming related. Making clips for c4s sucks right now. I am nice enough to leave my email in my shop for custom requests and what do these ungrateful sons of bitches do? They use it to ask me a bunch of bullshit questions that never lead to a clip being made. If these shitheads want a Q&A jerkoff session so bad come visit me when I'm live and we will talk in private bitch. Also, the fucking insect crush emails. I don't crush living things, except for guys heads who ask me this shit. Made 1.79 in sales total. This is why I am cranky all the time.

kitty_frost
06-09-2015, 08:40 PM
Holy crap, I've read through this entire thread, and yet I just got a request for something I haven't seen yet.
So the guy asks if I have any plastic bags. If I do he'll go exclusive. already this is interesting. So he takes me exclusive right aways and tells me to get a few plastic bags and some lotion. Then he has me lotion up my tits and ass, and then freaking wear two plastic bags as a bikini!
Then he wants me to grab my toy, put a bag on it and then show me what I'd do to his dick.
As weird as it may have been, it's things like that that make me freaking love this job

doublerainbow
06-10-2015, 12:48 AM
A guy today came into my room and asked if I had any newspaper or magazines.....

I didn't.....

The world may never know....

Kitcatt
06-10-2015, 01:30 AM
"you have heels bb?"
The first words of the fucktard who takes me to pvt with a new account every time I see him. Yes its 20 minutes, but it's 20 minutes of "ugh, yea, ugh, take it you filthy slut, take my young latino dick"
.....

audritwo
06-10-2015, 07:34 AM
Holy crap, I've read through this entire thread, and yet I just got a request for something I haven't seen yet.
So the guy asks if I have any plastic bags. If I do he'll go exclusive. already this is interesting. So he takes me exclusive right aways and tells me to get a few plastic bags and some lotion. Then he has me lotion up my tits and ass, and then freaking wear two plastic bags as a bikini!
Then he wants me to grab my toy, put a bag on it and then show me what I'd do to his dick.
As weird as it may have been, it's things like that that make me freaking love this job

Oh that guy..... YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I remember him. It was weird but at least he is willing to pay for his fetish!

I felt like this:
http://www.iget2work.com/img/walmartman.jpg

audritwo
06-10-2015, 07:37 AM
"you have heels bb?"
The first words of the fucktard who takes me to pvt with a new account every time I see him. Yes its 20 minutes, but it's 20 minutes of "ugh, yea, ugh, take it you filthy slut, take my young latino dick"
.....

I getting sick of these young dudes with their "young cock" because all I can think about is premature ejaculation.


Also adjusting my age a little bit near my actual age... I'm now considered a MILF. Wonderful. I got one site marketing me a teen, and another as a MILF. lol.