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View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....



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justanothercamgirl
10-02-2015, 12:38 PM
Base81: Remember Jesus loves you so much. He will help you. He will guide you. Don't do this to yourself. He loves you so much.

me: I receive that. I know he does. He also loves you as well dear.

Base81: Ash Him for help. You're worth more.

So I take that as I need to raise my rates. =D

Anytime someone 'tries to save me' I end up laughing out loud because I always think back to this meme.

http://www.funnymemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/Funny-memes-Jesus-died-for-your-sins.jpg

audritwo
10-02-2015, 08:40 PM
I'm one ugly mother fucker. Shield your eyes.

http://i.imgur.com/rmEVSyf.jpg

SimoneGray
10-02-2015, 10:10 PM
^^ You are so stunning it hurts!! You look like the perfect 1950's pin up.

/fangirl moment

bbwbrianna
10-03-2015, 02:34 AM
Broke Loser: hi
Broke Loser: can you type? sound doesn't work on my phone
Me: Sure ( These guys who allegedly don't have sound always seem to cause problems for me, I usually ignore them because I've pegged them as timewasters, but I bit).
Broke Loser: are your armpits wet or dry?
Me: Come find out
Broke Loser: I like hairy armpits. if they're wet even better.
Me: I do have some hair.
Broke Loser: can you get a tissue for armpit then we go prvt?
Me: If you tip me a small amount I can get up and get the tissues, then we can go private.
Broke Loser: sorry am not gonna tip then go private
Broke Loser: either tip or private
Me: You know what? That 12 dollars you have in your account isn't worth the aggravation. You were probably only gonna stay for two minutes anyway so you're really not worth my time if you don't even wanna tip me a tiny amount to get the fucking tissue.

It has been confirmed that all guys with no sound are a waste of time. These guys annoy the shit out of me. Time is money and if you expect me to do something you'd better pay up. These dudes always want me to change outfits or get things before private. All I ever ask for is a small tip. And they act like it's a big inconvenience and cop an attitude over fucking pocket change.

coma288
10-03-2015, 03:28 AM
Audritwo, is that an Arctic tank? I've got two of em' and they are to die for! Looking gorgeous by the way :)

hyori
10-03-2015, 08:43 AM
Audritwo, gawd those EYES! Flawless, just flawless.

Fuck that ramrod guy with a rollingpin...oh wait, he'll probably enjoy that.

MyRealNameIsWeird
10-03-2015, 09:18 AM
I'm one ugly mother fucker. Shield your eyes.

http://i.imgur.com/rmEVSyf.jpg

Dear God Audri! How can you go out without a paper bag on your head? Clearly this fellow was casually browsing, drowning in his waifu- I mean girlfriend's affections and accidentally clicked on your profile and your face killed his boner flat out. He may have a lawsuit in the works, watch out!

:p

MyRealNameIsWeird
10-03-2015, 09:24 AM
As a side note, from wearing my usual makeup (goth) for coupla days, I've finally hit the "do my fetish for pennies and peanuts" goldmine. It's as though they spot an alternative looking chick and assume that "all girls that dress weird are insecure and into freaky, kinky shit, so if I bitch and moan enough I can persuade her to shit on her grandmother's chest in a 30min show for $5". It makes me wonder how that attitude's working out for them.

scarlettbelle
10-03-2015, 11:12 AM
Me: I'll open it up and we can have this talk in Exclusive Chat. I don't do fetishes for free.

micro: that ok, im not looking at fetishes, never been with a woman so i am courius for comments. and to build courage for camming.

THAT SHIT RIGHT THERE. I am so freaking done with it. "BB will you meet up with me if I pay you $3000?" Nope, I'm not an escort. "Nooooo I'm not looking for an escort." But you want to meet up with me and pay me for sex? And somehow that's NOT prostitution?!

Or even better, "I just want to be your friend!!" Sooo why do you want to be MY friend, specifically? All you know about me is that I'm wearing a bra in my skype profile picture. Fuck off. QUIT LYING TO ME I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT.

/rant

Sunnylexie
10-03-2015, 11:34 AM
As a side note, from wearing my usual makeup (goth) for coupla days, I've finally hit the "do my fetish for pennies and peanuts" goldmine. It's as though they spot an alternative looking chick and assume that "all girls that dress weird are insecure and into freaky, kinky shit, so if I bitch and moan enough I can persuade her to shit on her grandmother's chest in a 30min show for $5". It makes me wonder how that attitude's working out for them.

Well that's easy. To most men, "much makeup" = "insecurity about looks". Which is really funny because in most cases they can't even guess if makeup is there unless it's really loud. I have been complimented about my "natural, no makeup look" while literally having my face whitewashed with concealer and drawn anew.

pinklemonade0
10-03-2015, 02:37 PM
would you fart on a cat or dog in pvt?

PhatGirlDynomite!!!
10-03-2015, 03:06 PM
While in private after telling him no puke during deepthroat

NastyFucker: Can you puke for me bb?
Me: Mmm maybe if I saw what you look like i'd wanna puke. But you already said you don't have a cam sooo no
NastyFucker: Okay so if I buy a cam you puke for me bb?

A perfectly good insult wasted on an idiot.

audritwo
10-03-2015, 04:32 PM
Audritwo, is that an Arctic tank? I've got two of em' and they are to die for! Looking gorgeous by the way :)

Yes it is :D

Cutie101
10-03-2015, 05:54 PM
42776

No comment.

MissAdriana
10-03-2015, 07:04 PM
I got asked to puke & gag on cam today too. I get that 1 often, don't understand how that is a fetish at all. Some nasty fetishes out there

sexysusie
10-03-2015, 10:16 PM
Idiot: Can you do anal with your hitachi?

http://38.media.tumblr.com/466ec89a7771a5724fbdecd0767abbe3/tumblr_n6nyty8H5h1ql5yr7o1_r1_400.gif

It was a slow burner but when i got this oh man....... //crying// :D

pixiepower329
10-03-2015, 10:23 PM
I am so asking my husband to say this to me tonight! :o)

Ah well... tonight he is back with another variation of his name..and has now escalated to calling me a bitch.

Sunnylexie
10-04-2015, 01:53 AM
42776

No comment.

I will burn in hell but I'm laughing because I've just imagined like 20 sad guys huddled together around a smartphone with hope in their eyes and dicks in their hands.

I take it as the era of "baby I'm in the military" is over lol.

Issabelle
10-04-2015, 02:31 AM
I will burn in hell but I'm laughing because I've just imagined like 20 sad guys huddled together around a smartphone with hope in their eyes and dicks in their hands.

I take it as the era of "baby I'm in the military" is over lol.

Nah, had three of those in the last week. Still alive and well. Also, the "I have cancer; show me your tits please" jackasses who really just need to burn in hell. Those are monthly occurrences.

SimoneGray
10-04-2015, 04:54 AM
Idiot: what can you show me as I have no credit

Me: lol for that you're going to have to be ok with just this (gestures to clothed self)

Idiot: but I'm not ok with that

Me: Lololololol well you're going to have to be

Idiot: but I'm really not ok with it

He went on for like another 20mins like that. I just laughed, it was that pathetic

CatBBW
10-04-2015, 06:46 AM
Last night in free on AW - note how his cam miraculously only works when he's not paying:

funnymarc enters the room
CatBBW: hi marc
funnymarc: hi cat
CatBBW: hiya hows you
funnymarc: horny
CatBBW: excellent marc, me too
funnymarc: have a strap on up me arse
CatBBW: I'd love to see marc, lets go private so I can have a look
funnymarc: cam dont work
CatBBW: shame
funnymarc: skype?
CatBBW: yes I take skype bookings marc, but your cam doesn't work, shame
funnymarc: skype works
CatBBW: cool, pop in a booking
funnymarc: [his skype name]
funnymarc: [his skype name again]
CatBBW: you need to pay first
funnymarc: hows that?
CatBBW: hows what?
funnymarc: hows that i need to pay?
funnymarc: whats your skype?
CatBBW: this site is pay to play. I am not here to look at shit for free
*kicks him out*

CatBBW
10-04-2015, 08:26 AM
Just now in a show:

"I want to lick your hairy clit bb"


Hmmm. I grow hair on my clit just as much as a man grows hair on his bellend. In other words, NONE. LOL

Vlodina
10-04-2015, 11:14 AM
Guy popped into priv while I was already naked

Kieran: When Alright my love. Spoke to Al and it's bad news. He said he has rejected your leave for Christmas, because of the battalionFTRX. He said he told you he would try let you go but he still isn't sure if he will need you yet. Sorry I'll you stop cramming

MyRealNameIsWeird
10-06-2015, 07:08 AM
"I want to be dominated!"

Good, what are your limits?

"None. I have no limits at all. Abuse me and humiliate me please mistress!"

*10min of worship, begging, abuse and kinky shit*

Now, slave, I want you to bend over for me.

"Oh no, not that!" *either uses safe word or logs off*

No limits apparently means something else to some guys. Generally I can tell from the thread of the conversation, but when there's so much kink and something as simple as pegging breaks them... ¬¬

AlexiaRoss
10-06-2015, 08:55 AM
I shouldn't bitch because I actually had a really good night despite my terrible attitude and resistance to logging on last night but I was getting fed up with SM and I didn't feel in a hustling mood, so I figured I would go spend some time on MFC where I occasionally cam at. Put my topic for a cumshow and made the description "@ goal will use my 9" dildo to cum" something similar to what I would put in a GS description...I had a cunt of a man either trying to get a rise out of me or who is actually insane start rambling on about how do I expect anyone to believe a girl as little as me could fit a 9" dildo in my body and that I am lying by saying that I can. I ignore this and he persists...so i explain I have used the toy a million times and it does fit. He starts again with "A million times hey? Bullshit!" I couldn't tell if he was being sarcastic, or whatever. I ignore it again and get taken to a TruPrivate for a half hour and when I come back he has literally been bitching the whole time to my chat room about how there is no possible way I could fit that toy in me, and that I am just a silly skank trying to "pose" as a new model claiming I have used a toy that he is adamant I cannot use "a million times" and has gone on a rampage about me for an entire half hour when I am not even there... Nobody in the chat room even responded to him...

This man clearly knows my entire anatomy better than me, and of course is 100% certain that a silicone fake 9" penis will not "fit" and that I am a horrible women for making such outrageous claims. Seriously, I pushed a 7 pound baby out of me just over a year ago.. I actually cannot even believe how ridiculous that was. At 2:30AM I guess thats the crowd I draw on cam... ugh. Sorry for my long rant lol.

audritwo
10-06-2015, 09:18 AM
Him: I want raceplay.

Me: okay what's your race.

Him: brown

Me: can you tell me is there anything specific you'd like to hear. Do you want humiliation or not. Also what's brown?

Him: anything

Me: what is brown? There are so many brown colored akin tones.

Him: Indian

Me: okay, do you want me to say any slurs. I don't know any Indian slurs. Can you tell me some

Him: yes.

Waited a minute, no reply. So I just did the best I could. I spent 20 minutes calling him brown... omg.

justanothercamgirl
10-06-2015, 09:27 AM
Hello,

I saw your profile and decided to contact you, I hope it's okay?

I'm an attractive 35 year old married guy from the <city name here> area. I'm curious to know if you are open to the idea of doing some private adult video with me? It is for my own personal use and I don't want something on the net or for other to see. This is a fantasy of mine and no one other than myself will ever view it. I would be willing to arrange privacy documents if you were concerned about it, assuming you are interested.

I know this is a lot to ask of a stranger, I can assure you I'm not running a scam or attempting to take advantage of you. I'm sorry if my request has offended you, that was not my intention.

Please let me know if you are interested and we can discuss it further?

Thanks for your time,

Mr. Does Not Understand Camgirls

Sunnylexie
10-06-2015, 12:36 PM
Idiot basic: grab your b oobs to prove you're real
Me: Oh ok you've caught me. I'm actually a recorded video.
Idiot basic: please prove you're real
Idiot basic: prove please

KittieVenom
10-06-2015, 01:56 PM
My favorites have been:

"You look like a slutty Kat Von D" (I have a good amount of tattoos)
"Smoke weed for me on cam bb"
"Do you live near ___?
"If I come there to visit, we can get a house in the hills and I can eat your ass in the hot tub"
"Do slutty Suicide Girl things for me" (I don't know what a slutty suicide girl would do...)
Had a creepy pasty looking dude spank himself while yelling "Jam that thing in harder!" meaning my toy....He was blocked.

Then of course the ever-popular:
"Get me hard so we can go pvt"

Also, has anyone ever copied and pasted something like:
"____ has sent you 200 Gold!" that's obviously just typed in the chat. I even called a guy out on it the other day and asked him if he thought models were that fucking stupid. He replied "Some are lol." And it was free chat. He promptly left.

Serena-Shields
10-06-2015, 04:49 PM
42786

THIS GUY UGH. He comes in my room every month or so (after the bans lift), says something annoying and then makes another account once he gets banned.

I was done with my show so I just fucked around with him for a bit and then he got like...polite? What? He called me a cunt and then we had an actual discussion.

Like..weirdest troll ever?

audritwo
10-06-2015, 06:01 PM
42786

THIS GUY UGH. He comes in my room every month or so (after the bans lift), says something annoying and then makes another account once he gets banned.

I was done with my show so I just fucked around with him for a bit and then he got like...polite? What? He called me a cunt and then we had an actual discussion.

Like..weirdest troll ever?

They want a reaction. If you don't give them the rise, you are now worthy of politeness. I swear to god.

audritwo
10-06-2015, 06:30 PM
Are you wearing a wig?

Man my hair must be perfect tonight if you think it's fake. THANK YOU!

pixiepower329
10-06-2015, 06:59 PM
@Audritwo I'd like to lodge a complaint....

Every time I go to check my placement, I get incredibly distracted by your booty. I hereby ask that you stop having such a hot booty. That is all :D

EffyRose
10-06-2015, 07:55 PM
"Those tittes would make you good at erotic massages"

LoraDoll
10-06-2015, 09:41 PM
i use only glass toys for anal, even an idiot know that:
a: it s not flexible.
b: ^ in that case, it s not gonna go up, all the way...

idiot of course: "all the way up". Asked him, how do he imagine that - trusting, he have hazy knowledge about women anathomy.
Pathetic.

another:
him: - i m bored.
Me: - happens.
- i wanna go outside
- than go outside lol.
- but it s almost midnight here.
- (fuck cares) let s have fun here, than!
- I want u to spin around very quick, till u get dizzy
- sure after u show it how.
- no deal.
- i m sure in that. Bann.

Can t belive i started to talk to the idiot. :brow:

- can u stand up?
- why u think i can't, maybe i dont have legs or what?
- oh u funny.
very funny, yeah...

Flickdreams
10-06-2015, 10:18 PM
Just now in a show:

"I want to lick your hairy clit bb"


Hmmm. I grow hair on my clit just as much as a man grows hair on his bellend. In other words, NONE. LOL

In other news I once fucked a guy with hair growing up his shaft, right up, truly a turn off. Anyone else seen that? Amongst the thousand dick pics?

coma288
10-07-2015, 01:32 AM
Yes it is :D

That's awesome! I've made some juices that come out amazingly in my Arctic but just awfully in my Herakles. The flavour is amazing!

On topic... Idiot: hey little boobs (I'm a natural c/d)
Me: they're nice though, aren't they? Just lovely bouncy things!
Reg: you answer to 'little boobs now?'
Me: Nahhh, I just love fucking with trolls, I always imagine these little dick dudes, sitting in their moms basements, fapping furiously (cue furious fake jerking of a tiny dick), trying to get a rise out of me
Reg: I've never seen you jerk an imaginary dick
Idiot: logs off

Best part is the tips after that, apparently staying in control is sexy XD

pinklemonade0
10-07-2015, 01:54 AM
Alexia: the moment they start up with stuff that stupid I just ban now. Even after one sentence. Sometimes you just know nothing good is going to come of it.

SimoneGray
10-07-2015, 08:36 AM
"do you ever a escot be? i study shakspear am intellingent man. love tits. want urs. escort?"

Found this in my inbox...I don't even know where to begin/

justanothercamgirl
10-07-2015, 08:53 AM
"do you ever a escot be? i study shakspear am intellingent man. love tits. want urs. escort?"

Found this in my inbox...I don't even know where to begin/

I, for one would think you'd look smashing in an ascot. ;)

SimoneGray
10-07-2015, 09:44 AM
^^ why thank you :D funniest thing is that he ended off the mail spelling it correctly, so I'm not sure if it was oversight or general confusion.

QueenBitch
10-08-2015, 04:41 AM
lol no

me: hi :-) hru?

fucktard: Cute dimples

me: thanks :-)

fucktard: Welcome

me: what can I help you with today?

fucktard: Wish I was in your room with you!

me: luckily you're in my chatroom and we can have fun in private

fucktard: I know I am!

me: what would you like to do?

fucktard: What I'd like to do is fuck you hard but can't do that threw a camera lol

me: i don't even do shows like that. domination only.
and i have a boyfriend. so you can cross that off your list

fucktard: Awww lol
Can I see your tittys

me: if you tip me $5, sure

fucktard: How about I get a whole show for 5$

me: how about no

miss cleo
10-08-2015, 07:03 AM
This prick just tipped me gold to see my tits and then said "ive seen better"!! Fucking cunt

Sunnylexie
10-08-2015, 12:12 PM
This prick just tipped me gold to see my tits and then said "ive seen better"!! Fucking cunt
A special breed of trolls. Guys like him buy into GS's not to watch the show but to kill the mood and spoil it for everyone else.

Serena-Shields
10-08-2015, 03:13 PM
They want a reaction. If you don't give them the rise, you are now worthy of politeness. I swear to god.
It was so weird! Usually I just block him over and over but since I was done for the day and nobody was talking I was like...whatever. I guess he thinks he's a white knight for the greys. He kept going on about how they MIGHT tip eventually and I'm like...this isn't a layaway program. Immediate results or gtfo.

CharlieTen
10-08-2015, 04:59 PM
notveryclever: hi bb hru
notveryclever: carl 24 new york
charlieten: good thanks! how are you?
notveryclever: about to start work
notveryclever: but got $80 for a show
notveryclever: more if you do anal
charlieten: Sounds great. I don't do anal though
notveryclever: you will for a price
charlieten: no, I don't do anal
notveryclever: *leaves*

xCamLovex
10-08-2015, 10:40 PM
Are you a man?

where are your parents from? Wtffff??!

Can I buy you for the weekend/marriage?

Why are you so expensive?

Why do I have to pay? I don't want to.

SimoneGray
10-09-2015, 01:03 AM
42861

This was said to me right after the same dude proposed. apparently this was the reason I should marry him.

I can't quite figure out if it is the most romantic. stupid, or hilarious thing I have ever heard. Either way I laughed.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

RebeccaT
10-09-2015, 04:53 AM
42861

This was said to me right after the same dude proposed. apparently this was the reason I should marry him.

I can't quite figure out if it is the most romantic. stupid, or hilarious thing I have ever heard. Either way I laughed.

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Let's hope that's where he keeps his wallet.

pippapippa
10-09-2015, 09:14 AM
Guy keeps talking about shit over and over... Obviously has no intention of going private, but I try one last time because I'm having a bad week
him: I want to lick your ass
me: Maybe you should do that in private or exclusive. I'm ready whenever you are.
him: Have you ever licked a guys ass?
me (sarcastically but sweetly): If you aren't on a cam site to pay, there are some porn sites I can recommend
him: You know me so well. Which ones?


For fucking real???