View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....
Issabelle
01-27-2016, 08:23 PM
^^ And since these ladies have stolen all the funny answers, I will add a practical one:
This is why I set a 10 minute minimum on all indy shows. Seriously, the 'as much as I can as cheap as I can get it' dudes tend to vanish when the prices are in the $3+/minute range and they have to pay for at least 10 minutes. I like to charge $40/10 minutes, just to run the fuckwits off.
Stevie710
01-27-2016, 09:54 PM
custy:feel like watching me cum? been 3 days
me:500 for c2c
custy:don't have that
me:okay then find someone else to watch you jerk off for free
This is a normal, everyday conversation right here folks
SweetJulia
01-27-2016, 11:23 PM
^I so want to write a book called "A Day at The Office " about all my camming adventures some day. In alphabetical order, cuz I'm so OCD . From anal with office supplies and hair gel when I was stuck in a hotel with no sex toys, to a mummy show-three rolls of tp in, I realized he was severely congested from snorting tons of drugs and meant "mommy", as in impregnation, to the one who wanted me to wrap a dildo in tin foil and pretend the Wicked Witch and Tin Man broke down on the side of the road and had a three some with the tow truck guy, played by none other than Gary Coleman.
Stevie710
01-27-2016, 11:55 PM
I would like to be on the pre-order list for this book lol
audritwo
01-27-2016, 11:58 PM
daniboy1997: im confused to how ur ass looks this way in pics but not the same in exclsuive(yes i have went exclsuive with u) waste of time
how u do that?
http://45.media.tumblr.com/5af26cbe333012d4b66381bc1d87610e/tumblr_mv6my8MtWt1rqlnsko1_500.gif
EllieGold
01-28-2016, 01:34 AM
This week I have had about 10 guys in the gold show ask "pvt" like what the hell. 99% chance they won't. I think I am getting the same dude asking over and over again.
EllieGold
01-28-2016, 01:48 AM
daniboy1997: im confused to how ur ass looks this way in pics but not the same in exclsuive(yes i have went exclsuive with u) waste of time
how u do that?
http://45.media.tumblr.com/5af26cbe333012d4b66381bc1d87610e/tumblr_mv6my8MtWt1rqlnsko1_500.gif
i got a good laugh. :)
EllieGold
01-28-2016, 03:39 AM
Lifetime12: If i pay you alot of money would you fuck a dog for me in exclusive
Lifetime12 has been blocked.
CatBBW
01-28-2016, 09:17 AM
I guess this is my "Welcome to Streamate" idiot :D
LegendaryBlackKnight: I want to pound your vagina daily like a jackhammer with my virgin penis KISSES
OpenBobsBB
01-28-2016, 11:07 AM
^^ And since these ladies have stolen all the funny answers, I will add a practical one:
This is why I set a 10 minute minimum on all indy shows. Seriously, the 'as much as I can as cheap as I can get it' dudes tend to vanish when the prices are in the $3+/minute range and they have to pay for at least 10 minutes. I like to charge $40/10 minutes, just to run the fuckwits off.
Yeah I have a $20 minimum, but I'm heavily considering bumping my rates up and I definitely will when I get a better camera but I feel like I should wait until that happens to do so since my cam is kind of ancient by tech standards. Thanks for the tip bb!
Issabelle
01-28-2016, 11:26 AM
Yeah I have a $20 minimum, but I'm heavily considering bumping my rates up and I definitely will when I get a better camera but I feel like I should wait until that happens to do so since my cam is kind of ancient by tech standards. Thanks for the tip bb!
Bump them now. Dudes know that we get a higher percentage cut on indy sites than on box sites, so they sit there and guilt us for daring to set our prices to levels that would make us more for independent sites. Example: $4 on CMD is half my SM exclusive rate, and yet dudes have the audacity to say I should only be charging $2 because I keep so much more. Go fuck yourself broski--you're still getting a fucking discount.
Feel no shame. Cam models are a luxury, not a requirement to live.
hyori
01-28-2016, 11:31 AM
Cam models are a luxury, not a requirement to live.
And that officially becomes my siggy! xoxo
sexkitten_666
01-28-2016, 01:50 PM
44121
Fucking really???
Where do these people come from??
webcamcutie
01-28-2016, 02:36 PM
I literally want to :O :shoot: when guys come in and say:
Hi bb, you look bored? :bored:
Like really, please tell me how I should look when there is nothing but constant in and outs and no one talks and no one has a sense of humor? :banghead:
I think these ones feel the wrath from me the most!
Issabelle
01-28-2016, 02:55 PM
44121
Fucking really???
Where do these people come from??
Oh yeah, he's a regular dude. He'll ask for shows, videos, and so on, but wants to haggle the price down every time. To this day, none of us can actually confirm if he's ever paid, but he's hit up plenty of women. Seems like he has figured out how to get off just on the discussion/angry yelling about ruining hair models send back.
And that officially becomes my siggy! xoxo
You've just fulfilled a minor life goal of mine Hyori. Goddess status in 3 more posts and my keyboard-warrioring winding up in somebody's siggy in the same week? Time to buy a lotto ticket--I'm on a roll! lol
innocentindian
01-28-2016, 03:17 PM
This moron was camping in my free chat today!
Sponge35 - has entered the room
Me - Hi there, Sponge!
Sponge35 - continues to sit there for 10 minutes, silent
Me - You guys are not chatty at all today, what's up?
Sponge35 - hi
Me - goes private for 20 minutes, comes back
Sponge35 - hey
Me - what's up, Sponge?
Sponge35 - sits for 15 minutes, silent
Me - Sponge, what are you doing? Are you horny? Do you even want a show? At least chat with me if you're not horny.
Sponge35 - I don't know what to say
Sponge35 has been kicked out.
Sponge35 immediately comes back
Me (in a mocking voice) - How daaare you, Sponge? Coming back right after getting kicked. Rude :)
Sponge35 sits silently for 5 minutes
Sponge35 has been kicked out again
Sponge35 comes back
Sponge35 - sorry. Can i tip you?
Me - Yeah, for being so rude.
Sponge35 - I dont know how much to tip
Me - Tip whatever you feel is polite. Is this your fetish? Getting girls mad at you?
Sponge35 - I dont know
Sponge35 banned for life
Chellyinparadise
01-28-2016, 05:06 PM
Lifetime12: If i pay you alot of money would you fuck a dog for me in exclusive
Lifetime12 has been blocked.
What a nasty bastard some guys are just sick..
Chellyinparadise
01-28-2016, 05:08 PM
This moron was camping in my free chat today!
Sponge35 - has entered the room
Me - Hi there, Sponge!
Sponge35 - continues to sit there for 10 minutes, silent
Me - You guys are not chatty at all today, what's up?
Sponge35 - hi
Me - goes private for 20 minutes, comes back
Sponge35 - hey
Me - what's up, Sponge?
Sponge35 - sits for 15 minutes, silent
Me - Sponge, what are you doing? Are you horny? Do you even want a show? At least chat with me if you're not horny.
Sponge35 - I don't know what to say
Sponge35 has been kicked out.
Sponge35 immediately comes back
Me (in a mocking voice) - How daaare you, Sponge? Coming back right after getting kicked. Rude :)
Sponge35 sits silently for 5 minutes
Sponge35 has been kicked out again
Sponge35 comes back
Sponge35 - sorry. Can i tip you?
Me - Yeah, for being so rude.
Sponge35 - I dont know how much to tip
Me - Tip whatever you feel is polite. Is this your fetish? Getting girls mad at you?
Sponge35 - I dont know
Sponge35 banned for life
haha this made me laugh so hard, he was persistent wasnt he kept coming back
Chellyinparadise
01-28-2016, 05:13 PM
I guess this is my "Welcome to Streamate" idiot :D
LegendaryBlackKnight: I want to pound your vagina daily like a jackhammer with my virgin penis KISSES
haha i cant help but to laugh at him needed a laugh today. as if we just love to be pounded like a jackhammer
Chellyinparadise
01-28-2016, 05:14 PM
44121
Fucking really???
Where do these people come from??
haha i just cant stop laughing this is too much.. sounds so damn sexy .. not.. wtf is wrong with some guys , haha he wants you to not only ruin your hair but go grocery shopping for supplies the supplies alone would cost more than anything haha wtf..
pippapippa
01-28-2016, 08:07 PM
Can you put those jeans in your picture on and bend over and fart please? Please it's my dream for you to do that
Way to dream big, dude
BadBitch
01-28-2016, 10:31 PM
Jerkoff: Can I cover your mouth?
Me: Can I bend you over and fuck you in your ass?
Jerkoff: Shit on my dick. You know you would.
Me: Aw, sweety. You're in the wrong room. Your mom's room is a few boxes over to the left on the main page.
Jerkoff: Keep talking, bitch.
(Oh, looks like I struck a nerve)
Banned.
BadBitch
01-28-2016, 10:39 PM
During my GS countdown:
Moron: Let's go pvt.
Me: Sure. But, let me wait a few more minutes in case anyone wants to pledge in. Also, my rate for pvt is 6.99.
Moron: Let's go now.
Me: Sweety, I am going to wait a few minutes. I don't want to cancel for you to run off and not take me pvt.
Moron: Good luck with your $5 pledge. Don't spend it all in one place.
Me: No worries. I won't. However, the couple grand* I made last week, I WILL spend in one place.
Moron: Yeah, great line of work. How's that 401K?
Me: Baby, in addition to this job, I also work as a paralegal, so, my 401K is great.
Ban.
*Note: I didn't make a couple grand. I embellished. Haha!
BadBitch
01-28-2016, 10:42 PM
Guy: Your beautiful
Me: My beautiful what?
...He was so confused.
44123
BadBitch
01-28-2016, 10:50 PM
Ok, one more....
During a GS countdown:
Assnugget: (Hasn't tipped in yet and I'm still at $0): Just start it. They'll join in.
Me: So, if I was your boss, I call you into work and say, "Come work and maybe I will pay you at the end of the day."
Ban.
SweetJulia
01-28-2016, 11:09 PM
I do 100% Indy shows by having them pay with Amazon or gift cards before we start. I advertise on Backpage, in the WEBSITE section, making sure to mention I do cam shows only and that this isn't an offer for prostitution.
Dumbass: You advertise all over the country, how do you escort in all those time zones every day?
Dumbass 2: Hey, you accidentally put yourself in websites instead of escorts lol-cuz yeah, if I ever decided to escort, I'd use easy to track photos with my face showing.
Dumbass 3: I don't have to pay til after a show, in case I'm not happy, right?
*Cuz yeah, I just perform, like a dildo wielding robot, hoping you're happy and just accept whatever you eventually pay me the next day. Or week. Or month.
heyho
01-28-2016, 11:18 PM
I've had it with typing multiple times a day "no Paypal, but you can easily book me through my page here: etc". And then they stop replying and never book me. If you have money for Paypal, y u no have money for proper booking bb?
KittyCurious
01-29-2016, 01:48 AM
Chaturbate
dude: would you like to have some great time in private together honey?
dude: 60 tokens a minute? Holy shit!
Ahahahha I couldn't even be angry at that one, so funny! :3
AlyssaJane
01-29-2016, 03:44 AM
joelbarraza17: dog is licking wife ass
joelbarraza17 has been blocked.
PrettyPuppet
01-29-2016, 08:27 AM
My penis ejaculated sperm for you
Thank you
My pp happy
Well that's one weird way to say you came.
Chellyinparadise
01-29-2016, 10:57 AM
During my GS countdown:
Moron: Let's go pvt.
Me: Sure. But, let me wait a few more minutes in case anyone wants to pledge in. Also, my rate for pvt is 6.99.
Moron: Let's go now.
Me: Sweety, I am going to wait a few minutes. I don't want to cancel for you to run off and not take me pvt.
Moron: Good luck with your $5 pledge. Don't spend it all in one place.
Me: No worries. I won't. However, the couple grand I made last week, I WILL spend in one place.
Moron: Yeah, great line of work. How's that 401K?
Me: Baby, in addition to this job, I also work as a paralegal, so, my 401K is great.
Ban.
Awesome reply! Love that you put him in his place. We are much smarter than some of these men think.
MissAdriana
01-29-2016, 11:54 AM
devil: woah ur perfect
*leaves*
audritwo
01-29-2016, 04:57 PM
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: do you know what freemasonry is? -yes
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: its a fraternity , im the worshipful master of an all black prince hall lodge
theres 72 of us in the lodge and 33 of us like to use the lodge after hours to do bbc bukkake rituals with white girls -tell me about the lizard men
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: lol
they have green cocks and blue cum
they are 7 -13 feet tall -well that sounds gay
you can read the bible while all 33 of us cum on you -that sounds super gay
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: do you believe in lizard men
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: donald rumsfeild
the lizard men are jewish ahahaha
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: louis ck the comedian asked him on opie and anthony if he was a lizard man
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: he didnt deny it
lmao
louis ck was trolling him hes a comedian
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster has been blocked.
I got bored with him and his "club".
MissAdriana
01-29-2016, 06:12 PM
T.N.T: Hi mom
T.N.T: How are tou mom
T.N.T has been banned from the room
BadBitch
01-29-2016, 09:54 PM
My penis ejaculated sperm for you
Thank you
My pp happy
Well that's one weird way to say you came.
What is he, 5 years old? "My pp"?
BadBitch
01-29-2016, 09:57 PM
Awesome reply! Love that you put him in his place. We are much smarter than some of these men think.
Thanks, lady. On a total side note, I didn't make a couple grand. I embellished. Haha!
audritwo
01-29-2016, 10:07 PM
BILL_COSBYS_DRINK_MAKER has been blocked.
caramelcraze
01-30-2016, 04:03 AM
After repeatedly telling him I didn't want any pictures and only wanted to see him c2c
dumbass: im jus sayin you se pic if ya like then i go pvt
me: I haven't thrown up at the sight of anyone yet, so I don't think you'll change that.
Yesterday. Crickets are full swing in just about ever room. I'm ready to gouge my own eyes out from boredom. My vagine is dry as fuck from stress of said boredom. My dildos are shriveling from lack of use. My bank account is feeling neglected. Severely.
THEN * cue inspiring music* about 5 guys come in during an hour.
Guy1: How's it going bb?
Guy2: How's it going?
Guy3: How's it going.
Guy4: How's it going babe?
Guy5: You're so beautiful. How's it going?
My head was thinking of the most fowl thoughts, but of course I was ever so sweet by saying wonderful to each and every one of them.
EllieGold
01-30-2016, 04:14 PM
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: do you know what freemasonry is? -yes
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: its a fraternity , im the worshipful master of an all black prince hall lodge
theres 72 of us in the lodge and 33 of us like to use the lodge after hours to do bbc bukkake rituals with white girls -tell me about the lizard men
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: lol
they have green cocks and blue cum
they are 7 -13 feet tall -well that sounds gay
you can read the bible while all 33 of us cum on you -that sounds super gay
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: do you believe in lizard men
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: donald rumsfeild
the lizard men are jewish ahahaha
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: louis ck the comedian asked him on opie and anthony if he was a lizard man
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster: he didnt deny it
lmao
louis ck was trolling him hes a comedian
FreemasonicWorshipfulMaster has been blocked.
I got bored with him and his "club".
Seems like a lot of people are into the masonic religion trend lately. I think I saw another one with that username before.
Procrasturbator
01-30-2016, 06:08 PM
[4:57:19 PM] EREN: hi
[4:57:21 PM] EREN: baby
[4:57:27 PM] EREN: how are you
[4:57:35 PM] EREN: ım horny
[4:57:41 PM] EREN: do you lıke sex
[4:59:01 PM] Me: Hey there
[4:59:09 PM] Me: Are you looking for a show? (I'd already figured he wasn't serious about a show but I figured I'd just be very direct and give him a chance)
[5:00:40 PM] EREN: Yes, I'm here to show you is so horny she wants
[5:01:29 PM] Me: How many minutes do you want?
[5:01:38 PM] Me: I'm $3/minute for shows 10-29 minutes
[5:02:31 PM] EREN: with the money the show no no no I just watch porn better
I'm not even mad, I laughed so hard. No no no!
AlyssaJane
01-30-2016, 08:31 PM
I was told in free chat that I didn't have very many comments for somebody who has been camming almots a year. Ummm I have 50 comments. How many does he expect me to have?
audritwo
01-30-2016, 10:46 PM
diond97: How is you and your dads relationship? -are you fishing for daddy issue shit?
No
diond97: Just answer the question honestly -ok, for $150 tip i'll answer it.
Why the hell would I want to do that -so i can give you your answer. if not, you'll never know
diond97: Thats too bad -yep
diond97 has been blocked.
KittyCurious
01-31-2016, 01:53 AM
That was the last fucking time I was nice to a guest!!!
flirt4free
Idaho_292120150: how much fot topless
le me: Well I flash boobs for 60 credit tip
le me: if you register yo get some free credits to spend, so go register and get my tits
Idaho_292120150: what about a sneak peak. so i know the registration is worth it.
FUCK WHAT?! SNEAK FUCKIN PEEK TO SEE IF FUCKIN REGISTRATION WITH FREE FUCKIN CREDITS WORTH IT!!!!!!!!
Bitch, that was the most disgusting freeloading ever.
Thanks God we don't work with Jasmin anymore!
Fuck it!
KittyCurious
01-31-2016, 03:24 AM
MFC, cumshow after countdown just ended
golf999: has she quirted yet
myroomhelper: nope she squirts in skype and pvt, says not for crowd
golf999: oh how boring
myroomhelper: oh how rude
myroomhelper: you didn't even pay a cent :D
golf999: oh well
Dude... WHAT?!
Oh yes, 40 points, zero tokens and complaints instead of kiss tippers asses for allowing him to see that.
I have no words o_O
yeah sure, banned and stuff.
But... Seriously, are they brainless?
One does not complain at the gift someone else paid for!
Vlodina
01-31-2016, 06:48 AM
member2339: Cmon one on the house it's my girlfriends birthday
SweetJulia
01-31-2016, 01:31 PM
I do 100% Indy shows for the most part. I advertise in the websites section of Backpage, under adult entertainment. I don't use the reply to function, so they have to read the whole ad to get my contact info. and I guess saying "I'm a webcam model who only does webcam shows" three times, including the in the title is read as "please send me cock pics and convince me to escort." I got thirty responses, twenty asking my rates and what I do. Was I a bad person in a past life? Is this payback for the lip gloss I stole at twelve? Sex workers are not interchangeable. You won't convince me to meet up, lower my rates, or chat for free in downtime. Oh, one guy did tell me to up my rates, so I'd have free time to chat with him. Why, why, why do they think they're special?
PrettyPuppet
02-01-2016, 01:08 AM
dumbass1: hi
Me: How are you?
dumbass1: hard sweet
Me: Lets go prvt so I can take care of that for you
dumbass1: why prvt?
Me: because I don't play for free
nor do i
Me: So you should have no problem going prvt or excl to play.
dumbass1: so u gonna pay me too?
dumbass2: you having a boy or girl?
me: Girl
dumbass2: mmmmm
she gonna be a slut too?
*congratulations, the first guy I blocked during an exclusive session*
Sunnylexie
02-01-2016, 01:14 AM
Just had a wannabe dom complain about being (quote) "depressed because so many girls on the site claim to be true submissives but can't show basic respect to a dominant man". Cry me a river "Master" lol. Am I expected to turn my sub mode on out of pity, and call you "Sir" and act all subservient in free chat just so you stop feeling depressed?
Vlodina
02-01-2016, 02:10 AM
dumbass2: you having a boy or girl?
me: Girl
dumbass2: mmmmm
she gonna be a slut too?
*congratulations, the first guy I blocked during an exclusive session*
Anticipating shit like this is why I won't tell them the sex. It's a sex site and my (unborn) child is not something I'm willing to go into detail with when they have their hands in their dicks.