View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....
MommieLongLegs
03-01-2012, 12:45 PM
I had a supposed 45-year-old woman take me private yesterday
Her: my daughters your age
Me:o well my dad's your age (:/)
Her:my daughter would love you
she's very pretty and sexual
Her: your dad would be proud of you
she just goin on and on, but I was paying attention to another guy in the room. I wish I would've blocked her (or him)
Shit like that really makes me sick
Seductive
03-01-2012, 01:24 PM
I had a supposed 45-year-old woman take me private yesterday
Her: my daughters your age
Me:o well my dad's your age (:/)
Her:my daughter would love you
she's very pretty and sexual
Her: your dad would be proud of you
she just goin on and on, but I was paying attention to another guy in the room. I wish I would've blocked her (or him)
Shit like that really makes me sick
That's one of my most hated things guys can say. "Your dad must be so proud to have a whore for a daughter." or "Glad to see your parents raised you right you slut." Oh my gosh, you mean that my job doesn't confirm to normal standards and thus I could be ostracized and there might be long term ramifications? Holy guacamole, I'll quit right now. I mean, before you mentioned these things, I had never ever ever thought that people might think differently of me for working in the sex industry.
Then again there is this: (Warning: extreme sarcasm)
Him: hey bb
Me: Hello.
Him: Are you hairy? (No, its only in my profile because I like to see the look of disappointment on guys faces when I show them my shaven pussy.)
Me: Yes, I don't shave or trim at all.
Him: How hairy is it?
I'm about to respond when I see his name and realize he's seen my show before. I double check and yep, he had a ten minute show last night. Why are you asking me how hairy it is when you've already seen it? Then he comes out with this gem.
Him: Will you fuck your ass for me? I've been watching other cam girls so I'm ready to go but I want to bust a nut to you fingering your ass. (RAWR!!! Did you not see see right in my profile where it says "I don't offer anal?!? And fuck you. You want me to put myself through pain just so I can maybe, maybe get two dollars off you because I know the second you see a dildo in my ass you'll cum and be gone. That's its, I'm pissed.)
Me: Goddamn it you fucking jackass, every question you've asked is right in my profile. It says right there: I don't do anal. Fuck! >:(
He left immediately after that but oddly enough, came back ten minutes later and we had a quick five minute show.
lissieBella
03-01-2012, 04:06 PM
I had a supposed 45-year-old woman take me private yesterday
Her: my daughters your age
Me:o well my dad's your age (:/)
Her:my daughter would love you
she's very pretty and sexual
Her: your dad would be proud of you
she just goin on and on, but I was paying attention to another guy in the room. I wish I would've blocked her (or him)
Shit like that really makes me sick
this one guy took me pvt once and he says he wants to roleplay so i said sure i do that. but then he tells me he wants me to pretend im his little sister because i look just like her. i was so upset and pissed at this rapist im sure he probably raped his sister. BAN
MommieLongLegs
03-01-2012, 04:41 PM
I swear these men were born with 1/4 of a brain. I don't understand all the sibling, parent/child roleplay requests. Like what the fuck is your fucking problem!!
ShadySailor
03-01-2012, 09:19 PM
AnnoyingIdiot: are you single now
AnnoyingIdiot: a NON SMOKER
Me: Nope I have a BF
AnnoyingIdiot: i live alone in Toronto
AnnoyingIdiot: ok dear
AnnoyingIdiot: pls stand up ty
Me: There are photos of me standing on my profile :)
AnnoyingIdiot: ok i will rate you
AnnoyingIdiot: would like to see you syanding up ty
Me: Standing pics are on my profile :)
AnnoyingIdiot: good luck with you $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ hehe
AnnoyingIdiot: no standing up NO rating
Me: LOL
AnnoyingIdiot: if you were my GF you would NOT need to work here / i would support you that what a man is for
Me: dude....you know i don't actually "GET" anything off of a rating, right
Me: it doesn't DO anything for me
Me: so why would i care if one person didn't rate me when I already have 5 stars from 400+ people
Me: LOL
Me: goodbye
To think I could have had this guy support me! What a dream come true!
Apparently even though supporting a girl is what "a man is for", this dude can't shell out one tiny tip. Typical!
Tsani
03-02-2012, 01:42 PM
I find it funny that guys think that we all do this work purely out of necessity. I have a man who supports me but I still do this because I want to! Sure I do it for the extra cash too but if I didn't like doing this I would find another way to make extra cash. Guys need to know that we're not "forced into this type of work".
Also about the "your dad would be so proud" comment, my dad IS very proud of me for taking control of my sexuality and using it to my advantage. He feels that this type of work is empowering to women, which I agree that it is. I love my sexuality and if I can make money sharing it then more power to me! This job is beneficial to me not just financially, but to my mental health. I have self esteem issues and this job helps me feel beautiful and empowered!
OK done with my little off-topic rant, just wanted to comment on some of the dumb shit that guys just don't seem to get most of the time.
MommieLongLegs
03-02-2012, 02:20 PM
Guys have been saying the "you shouldn't have to work here" or "where's your man?" or "no ring on your finger?" crap at just about every place I've worked.
Fast Food Restaurant: too pretty to be here (well at 19[at the time], on my own n little prior job experience, where do u suppose I work?)
Pharmacy 1:you're always here! (duh gotta pay rent n my live in bf [now ex] is a broke douche)
Pharmacy 2: no ring on that finger? or when I hit the lotto, we're goin to Vegas or I'd take care of you etc. (no comment)
Yes, I would love to be a housewife and cook and clean and take care of my future two kids, BUT just because that hasn't happened yet (and I'm only 23), doesn't mean I'm miserable and desperate. I'm happy that I was able to rescue myself from Pharmacy 2, and didn't wait on my knight in shining armor to tell me I don't have to work there anymore lol.
Also, I only know 2 other women who want that lifestyle (housewife).
And if these guys really wanted to "take care of me", they would tip and go Exclusive evey chance they get so I would never have to worry about money ever again ha!
AngelAuset
03-04-2012, 03:21 AM
I've been a cam girl for all of <12 hours and I have to ask. What is with the "(thing they want you to do) plz bb. that is my request" guys? I get that so often. Like, is there some ironic sign somewhere implying that I take requests in free?
Incantatious
03-04-2012, 04:23 AM
this one guy took me pvt once and he says he wants to roleplay so i said sure i do that. but then he tells me he wants me to pretend im his little sister because i look just like her. i was so upset and pissed at this rapist im sure he probably raped his sister. BAN
Okay. Fantasies do NOT = rapist.
You have exchanged a few lines with someone whose fantasies you didn't like, and assume he's a rapist. Not cool.
Incantatious
03-04-2012, 04:57 AM
I swear these men were born with 1/4 of a brain. I don't understand all the sibling, parent/child roleplay requests. Like what the fuck is your fucking problem!!
Oh dear lord. Incest fantasies = 1/4 of a brain?
You are a SEX WORKER. Fantasies are your JOB. This might mean it might be a nice idea to use some incentive at some point and brush up on your knowledge about them.
a. So you can better indulge the people whose fantasies you DO want to entertain, thus improving your expertise.
b. So you don't start assuming terrible things about people you don't know the moment someone comes along requesting something you won't / don't want to perform.
You won't because you will understand it. Accept that people have fantasies like this. And MOVE ON.
You do NOT have to indulge them, but mindlessly going off on one because you get requested them, and you don't understand them is ridiculous and offensive to those who do have those fantasies. It's a waste of your time and energy when you could better spend it on educating yourself.
For the record, the brain that indulges in incest fantasies, is the same brain I've used to harness the knowledge and compassion that I give to others.
IsobelWren
03-04-2012, 07:50 AM
I had a supposed 45-year-old woman take me private yesterday
Her: my daughters your age
Me:o well my dad's your age (:/)
Her:my daughter would love you
she's very pretty and sexual
Her: your dad would be proud of you
she just goin on and on, but I was paying attention to another guy in the room. I wish I would've blocked her (or him)
Shit like that really makes me sick
Yeah she was trying to get you to do an incest thing.
MommieLongLegs
03-04-2012, 11:10 AM
Oh dear lord. Incest fantasies = 1/4 of a brain?
You are a SEX WORKER. Fantasies are your JOB. This might mean it might be a nice idea to use some incentive at some point and brush up on your knowledge about them.
a. So you can better indulge the people whose fantasies you DO want to entertain, thus improving your expertise.
b. So you don't start assuming terrible things about people you don't know the moment someone comes along requesting something you won't / don't want to perform.
You won't because you will understand it. Accept that people have fantasies like this. And MOVE ON.
You do NOT have to indulge them, but mindlessly going off on one because you get requested them, and you don't understand them is ridiculous and offensive to those who do have those fantasies. It's a waste of your time and energy when you could better spend it on educating yourself.
For the record, the brain that indulges in incest fantasies, is the same brain I've used to harness the knowledge and compassion that I give to others.
Hmmm...yes i am a sex worker, but seeing as I've experienced some of these things, it feels more like reality than fantasy. When guys want this, I always assume that they have already done, and are not seeing it as a fantasy.
I love bondage, but I could see a girl not understanding it because she was tied up against her will before (as an example). So, I get that other girls have no problem doing this. I probably shouldn't have made the "1/4 of a brain" comment because I'm sure these guys really do just see it as a fantasy/role play, and haven't actually molested their daughters or had sex with their kid sisters/kid cousins.
But, if this has happened, then what? Is it role playing reality? I guess I just don't get it, but that's why others do it and I don't.
MommieLongLegs
03-04-2012, 11:15 AM
A guy came into my room telling me that his 9 year old daughter liked me, and that she liked when he did xyz I kicked him out.
I guess the appropriate thing to do was assume it was just a fantasy, and that involving a little girl, also his daughter, is fine.
MissEgo
03-04-2012, 11:37 AM
The more camgirls who are offended / insulted by incest roleplay, the more customers there are for those of us who do it. Same as anything else, whether it's anal or couples shows or whatever.
'Nuf said.
MommieLongLegs
03-04-2012, 11:48 AM
The more camgirls who are offended / insulted by incest roleplay, the more customers there are for those of us who do it. Same as anything else, whether it's anal or couples shows or whatever.
'Nuf said.
That is very true. We are all different.
KateSwallows
03-04-2012, 12:00 PM
I know theres a hidden psychological reason as to why incest can be a fantasy, and I also know that doesn't mean that person wants to physically act it out, but for those who have researched on this topic, can I ask why?
Just as a mother of two, I can't really bring myself to want to understand this, even though i've always seen myself as quite open minded - but anything involving kids just really disturbs me..
So what i'm saying is, those who offer age roleplay, are you mothers too? How can you seperate reality from fantasy when it comes to this?
No hidden bitching here, i'm honestly intrigued!
DaisyRose
03-04-2012, 12:02 PM
Oh dear lord. Incest fantasies = 1/4 of a brain?
You are a SEX WORKER. Fantasies are your JOB. This might mean it might be a nice idea to use some incentive at some point and brush up on your knowledge about them.
a. So you can better indulge the people whose fantasies you DO want to entertain, thus improving your expertise.
b. So you don't start assuming terrible things about people you don't know the moment someone comes along requesting something you won't / don't want to perform.
You won't because you will understand it. Accept that people have fantasies like this. And MOVE ON.
You do NOT have to indulge them, but mindlessly going off on one because you get requested them, and you don't understand them is ridiculous and offensive to those who do have those fantasies. It's a waste of your time and energy when you could better spend it on educating yourself.
For the record, the brain that indulges in incest fantasies, is the same brain I've used to harness the knowledge and compassion that I give to others.
You can't fault MommieLongLegs for her viewpoints on incestual roleplaying. Just because someone is involved in the sexual industry doesn't mean this is the wild wild west and that everything goes or should. People like that seriously need psychiatric help because there should no reason as to why one would entertain a fantasy like that; especially one that involves anything pertaining to being underage. Remember all these pedophiles who acted on those sick acts first had to have the fantasies. Although, we don't control what customers do afterwards, there is sense of decency that as camgirls we should behaves out of our duty once we are online. I don't understand nor wish to as why you would justify incest or any other roleplay that's disturbing. People like that deserve a tongue lashing because they should be ashamed of themselves. Things that are taboo and are considered shameful keeps people in line. If we baby and cuddled these people then those who would leave their thoughts solely as fantasies suddenly become embolded to act them out. That tells you a lot about these people and what they could potentially be capable of. Obviously they have a seed planted in their minds but that doesn't mean that I have to water it and make the plant grow to later become an action.
loveshooks
03-04-2012, 12:08 PM
You are a SEX WORKER. Fantasies are your JOB
I agree with you completely, and choosing to engage in occasional incest fantasy is something I don't find particularly horrifying, (it's icky but...meh) so I'll do it.
Where I personally draw a line however is any roleplay (incest or otherwise) that involves (under)age play fantasies. I'm not a psychologist, but from the material I have read pedophiles will often try to seek social acceptance of their urges in order to 'justify' acting upon them, and I don't want to enage in anything that even has a 0.1% chance of 'assuring' some sick fuck that his urges are healthy....and therefore are acceptable to act upon.
I guess ultimately I draw a distinction between fantasy (incest, etc) and roleplay scenarios that tap into an individual's sexual 'wiring' (pedophilia). The former I'm ok with, the latter I feel is highly unethical and nauseating.
It all comes down to what we're individually comfortable with, though-we each bring our personal perspectives and experiences to this job, and none of us should ever do anything that causes us discomfort.
Incantatious
03-04-2012, 02:24 PM
This is one huge-ass motherfucker of a post.. I hope you might stick with it, though. <3
A guy came into my room telling me that his 9 year old daughter liked me, and that she liked when he did xyz I kicked him out.
I guess the appropriate thing to do was assume it was just a fantasy, and that involving a little girl, also his daughter, is fine.
A few nights ago, (and maybe a page or so back in this very thread!) you'll see that I had a guy in my room ask me if I'd watch him hang himself for $5000.
I had no idea how serious he was, and it was the first guy I had whose words I genuinely couldn't shake out of my head. Upon some chat about it here with other girls, and some more thought - he may have been serious, he may not have been serious. There are girls who would have been willing to entertain him, likely being as they are much more clued up about fetishes such as asphyxiation, and / or, have this fetish themselves.
The most appropriate thing to do, in any case of disgust, especially if that particular fetish is very personal to you, is just to ban rather than make any judgements about them based purely on their sexual fantasies.
In truth, age play doesn't make the person fantasising about it, any more of a danger to others than a guy who fantasises about having conventional sex with a woman, or the guy who fantasises about hanging himself whilst a woman watches. There are guys who get jailed for horrific sexual crimes, who keep what could very easily be deemed as "conventional" man-on-woman porn on their laptops. There are also guys who go through life without laying a finger on anyone, who wouldn't dream of harming anyone, who keep much more hard-core, violent porn on their laptops. It's all a 'case by case' basis, rather than "Oh you have those fantasies? Well I can now predict that you may, or will in the future, go on to sexually violate someone". And so, you COULD assume that the guy who fantasises about having sex with a woman might well be rapist, and you still wouldn't be any closer to being right, than you would if you were assuming that the age play guys are child molesters, or not.
I know theres a hidden psychological reason as to why incest can be a fantasy, and I also know that doesn't mean that person wants to physically act it out, but for those who have researched on this topic, can I ask why?
Just as a mother of two, I can't really bring myself to want to understand this, even though i've always seen myself as quite open minded - but anything involving kids just really disturbs me..
So what i'm saying is, those who offer age roleplay, are you mothers too? How can you seperate reality from fantasy when it comes to this?
No hidden bitching here, i'm honestly intrigued!
Ohh KateSwallows.. you're about to swallow a whole ton of... uhh.. somethin', with this!
Lol... that such a shit joke... I do apologise! ;D
I end up getting caught up in a tonload of anecdotes and tangents when I'm addressing topics like this, but I promise I'll try to tie it all up and link it all together. I know that this can be a massively sensitive topic, so it deserves detailing, but I'll also try to keep it as short as the dicks of guys who brag to me about their impossibly huge dicks and never show them to me...
I have wanted to understand sex since puberty; I bought my first book on sex education at 11 because I knew that doing my own research was the only way I'd get the quality of educated I wanted. I had my first orgasm as a result of buying that book. The more I read, the more it benefited my life for the better, the more I wanted to learn. My attitude towards fantasies is likely a combination of the fact that I started learning early, was extremely open to learning early, twinned with having what societal standards might deem "fucked up", myself. Previous partners of mine had either expressed discomfort regarding my sexual fantasies, or outright advised that I seek medical help for all this shit that goes on in my mind.
The strongly taboo, "forbidden fruit" nature of these fantasies, combined with me feeling outcast and condemned for them by those closest to me, actually lead to me thinking about them more. How this kind of taboo works is a little similar to the logic of if someone says to you: "Don't think of a black cat... Don't think about them. Black cats? Yeah, those.. don't think about black cats!" - and what do you do? You think about them! On top of that, having additional, very unwanted images pop up in my mind at random times of the day. They were almost like painful flash-backs of horrific sexual instances which never actually occurred, but really haunted me. These were not even things I would get off to - they were just intrusive thoughts telling me that I like them, and would violate random people sexually at any given time.
So I attended a psychiatric assessment, (I should add to secure legitimacy to the result, that the hospital I attended was Maudsley, the largest mental health training institution in the country and one of the leading psychiatric institutes in the UK), and handed the doctor a written account of all of my fantasies. I was far too scared to say them in words; I trembled like a leaf as he read. I learned that what I was going through, with the intrusive thoughts, was a form of something called Pure OCD, and told, quite frankly, to accept my sexual fantasies about all that "fucked up" stuff, and to actually indulge in fantasising about them, and that if I did, the other, troublesome ones, as well as my guilt, would fade.
I was not deemed a danger to society, on any level whatsoever, or deemed some kind of messed up lost cause and bundled into a straight jacket and thrown right in a padded cell (like I feared.) If there was any suspicion by this doctor that I could carry out my fantasies in reality, or that I posed any danger, I could rest assured that I would quite promptly be dealt with by this institute, and given the appropriate help on the basis of my thorough assessment. But since then, I dedicated more time to focussing on understanding my fantasies for the better. In the process, I wound up learning about others too. For example, I learnt that it can actually be relatively natural for mothers to have sexual thoughts about their own children. I learnt that victims of sexual crimes can wind up fantasising about the same scenario which scarred them, but with little tweaks in the fantasy which shift the power over to them instead of the predator.
Please do not take those two above examples as definitive, one-size-fits all outcomes of the experiences which pre-date them, but purely as possible examples. There are countless, limitless ways that we harness our fantasies in different ways, to negate otherwise troublesome experiences in our lives. Trauma, stress, anxiety, real helplessness, all make it difficult for us to feel aroused, and so we can take scenarios, and twist them around to accommodate feelings of safety - safe, secure, and comfortable enough for us to feel aroused... Even with all of this explaining, this post still feels so inadequate for the importance it deserves, and I'm growing more and more aware of how long this post is. But I want to throw out a book recommendation which has also served as a great source for this post: 'Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies' by Dr Michael Bader. It is without a doubt the best, and most well-explained book I've read detailing how and why we grow to obtain the fantasies we do, and why they're so varying, so specifically arousing, and so incredibly personal.
A 'quickie' regarding age play: I would be absolutely delighted to offer age roleplay in my work, if only it were permitted by Streamate. I don't find it difficult to separate age play fantasy from reality, any harder than it would be to separate, for example, a fantasy of having sex with a celebrity. It's now as natural as anything else to me. I can't be sure of how my fantasies and fetishes will change as I grow, and have children, (I am not currently a mother), but I am certain that for as long as I remember how they work, to accept them as natural. I trust my sanity and my integrity more than enough to know that violating the rights of any other human being sickens me. You can guess that I've learned that demonisation of fantasies, (from both my peers and myself), actually lead to me having them not only more frequently, but gave me additional ones, alongside feeling like I was some kind of inhuman monster.
DaisyRose - I now levy my above response to KateSwallows almost more to you than I do her. With no due respect, your view is massively detrimental, (likely more than you can even fathom), and it frightens me to think of how many more people share your opinion, and continue in ignorance, self-righteousness and vanity, to attempt to justify it as perfectly correct and actually moral. Being the knowledge whore that I am, give me evidence for your views, sourced from credited, qualified individuals, and I will start to take you seriously.
lissieBella
03-04-2012, 02:55 PM
Okay. Fantasies do NOT = rapist.
You have exchanged a few lines with someone whose fantasies you didn't like, and assume he's a rapist. Not cool.
he admitted he had abused his little sister (i did not include in the post i know). thats not fantasies thats sick IMO. but just because you think thats a normal fantasy doesnt mean its normal to me or everyone else. we are sharing experiences we all had with members, and everyone's experience's are unique. everyone has do's and dont's and it should be respected. my dont's are no incest or rape in this case. i can respect the fact that you dont mind having a guy like this in pvt.
lets get back on topic this is a thread to vent on our experiences and share. no too agree or disagree on others point of views
SarahTime
03-04-2012, 02:59 PM
This was a really interesting post , Incantatious. I appreciate you sharing something so personal. I personally do not choose to engage in a lot of fantasies because many of them make me uncomfortable. I really don't have anything useful to add, except that just because I don't want to do age play, incest, etc. type fantasies doesn't mean that the next girl should not do them if they are comfortable with it. I honestly think that if there were some wide spread prevention put on camgirls regarding all of these fantasies that a lot of people "disagree" with, than that would only pave the way for people to ACTUALLY ACT on their fantasies, because they do not have a healthy way to indulge in them.
Incantatious
03-04-2012, 03:06 PM
he admitted he had abused his little sister (i did not include in the post i know). thats not fantasies thats sick IMO. but just because you think thats a normal fantasy doesnt mean its normal to me or everyone else. we are sharing experiences we all had with members, and everyone's experience's are unique. everyone has do's and dont's and it should be respected. my dont's are no incest or rape in this case. i can respect the fact that you dont mind having a guy like this in pvt.
lets get back on topic this is a thread to vent on our experiences and share
Oh, woah! Now wait, let's get this completely straight: I haven't, and would NEVER condone abuse.
However, similarly to the guy who outright asked me if I'd watch him hang himself, how can I be sure they're telling me the truth? Unless he switches on his cam and I see him actually committing a crime, I just can't be, no matter how much these crimes may horrify me.
If I had any evidence at all for any crime being committed, I would report it immediately: first to the police, secondly to Streamate.
MommieLongLegs
03-04-2012, 03:22 PM
The world of sex is very complex, composed of many different fantasies. I get that, and am very open minded, otherwise I would never make it as a web cam model.
Edit: I agree with lissie that this thread is turning into a debate.
KateSwallows
03-04-2012, 03:28 PM
really indepth the message you put across incantatious, thanks for that :-) has opened my mind to the flashing images within your head etc, as i can relate, so that really gave an insight with things, but i still can't understand, as mommielonglegs says, about the underage role play - probably something i never will, which is a disappointment to myself cos i thought i was open minded! d'oh!
shywebcamgirl
03-04-2012, 05:53 PM
Edit: I agree with lissie that this thread is turning into a debate.
Then again, don't all thread here do that eventually? (I kid, I kid! Well, sort of! *grins*)
MommieLongLegs
03-04-2012, 06:51 PM
Guy in Free:
do u do phone? (yes)
u gon get thi big dick hard b4 we phone sexii
See, this is is what I'm talkin about. This is what I've been getting all day. I feel like throwing my computer across the room. It's hard to stay in good spirits sometimes.
Rosemary Rabbit
03-04-2012, 07:29 PM
-----
Sabbatha
03-04-2012, 08:23 PM
Guy in Free:
do u do phone? (yes)
u gon get thi big dick hard b4 we phone sexii
See, this is is what I'm talkin about. This is what I've been getting all day. I feel like throwing my computer across the room. It's hard to stay in good spirits sometimes.
I am so sick of these shit heads. LOL I have to constantly remind myself that camming is better than having an asshole boss crack a whip at an "ordinary job"
Bigsoftandwet1
03-05-2012, 05:00 AM
You can't fault MommieLongLegs for her viewpoints on incestual roleplaying. Just because someone is involved in the sexual industry doesn't mean this is the wild wild west and that everything goes or should. People like that seriously need psychiatric help because there should no reason as to why one would entertain a fantasy like that; especially one that involves anything pertaining to being underage. Remember all these pedophiles who acted on those sick acts first had to have the fantasies. Although, we don't control what customers do afterwards, there is sense of decency that as camgirls we should behaves out of our duty once we are online. I don't understand nor wish to as why you would justify incest or any other roleplay that's disturbing. People like that deserve a tongue lashing because they should be ashamed of themselves. Things that are taboo and are considered shameful keeps people in line. If we baby and cuddled these people then those who would leave their thoughts solely as fantasies suddenly become embolded to act them out. That tells you a lot about these people and what they could potentially be capable of. Obviously they have a seed planted in their minds but that doesn't mean that I have to water it and make the plant grow to later become an action.
beautifully said... thank u so much; i agree whole heartedly
shywebcamgirl
03-05-2012, 06:35 AM
I am so sick of these shit heads. LOL I have to constantly remind myself that camming is better than having an asshole boss crack a whip at an "ordinary job"
If you are ever in my free chat you will notice that after dealing with one of these asshats you can hear me saying very silently to myself through grit teeth. "I love my job.....I am lucky to have this job.....must.not.kill.....i mean love my job."
shywebcamgirl
03-05-2012, 06:43 AM
Although, we don't control what customers do afterwards, there is sense of decency that as camgirls we should behaves out of our duty once we are online. I don't understand nor wish to as why you would justify incest or any other roleplay that's disturbing. People like that deserve a tongue lashing because they should be ashamed of themselves. Things that are taboo and are considered shameful keeps people in line. If we baby and cuddled these people then those who would leave their thoughts solely as fantasies suddenly become embolded to act them out. That tells you a lot about these people and what they could potentially be capable of. Obviously they have a seed planted in their minds but that doesn't mean that I have to water it and make the plant grow to later become an action.
Argh, can't leave this alone! Must.debate.comment
"Things that are taboo and are considered shameful keeps people in line. "
Um, having sex with a sex worker is considered taboo and shameful and so is being a sex worker. By this logic than we all should be out of a job and not be sex workers.
"Remember all these pedophiles who acted on those sick acts first had to have the fantasies."
Fantasies do not equal reality. By this logic, people who participate in BDSM activities actually wants to hurt and hold someone against their will and will eventually move on to kidnapping and torture later.
Although, we don't control what customers do afterwards, there is sense of decency that as camgirls we should behaves out of our duty once we are online."
Am I also responsible for ever man who says he is cheating on his wife when he is on cam? Every man who has bad sex with his wife because I've fake an orgasm? Where does this sense of decency start and end? That is one heck of a slippery slope there.
KateSwallows
03-05-2012, 09:58 AM
theres a debate and then theres a debate! i think this is gonna get nowhere... most fantasies in general i'm sure can be discussed openly as for example, men who like to live back in nappies and be mothered - psychologically (think thats the word) just want to be cared for... BDSM, form of being controlled are probably controlling in real life and vice versa...
But underage/incest i still haven't heard of a 'psychological' reason for it, not sure if i'm making sense here lol
So yes, it's classed as a fantasy just like any other - but i think it differs, yes as cam girls were more there to be thereaputic to their sexual needs.. but theres a reason as to why it's for over 18s....
Maybe i'm just in with the 'side' who isn't as open minded as the other 'side' but the conversation seems to be going round in circles, incantatious gave a great explanation on fantasies in general
But kids.... i dunno...
TheBrownFox
03-05-2012, 01:21 PM
NemesisThePunisher on SM cracks me up! I wish she would join this forum! :D I like the fact that she doesn't take any shit, and she'd probably have all kinds of stuff to add to this thread. :P
Getting back on topic...a guy in ImLive private chat was talking about how he loves Black women, and then he's like "I love your big nigga tits." *rolls eyes*
DaisyRose
03-05-2012, 01:42 PM
This is one huge-ass motherfucker of a post.. I hope you might stick with it, though. <3
A few nights ago, (and maybe a page or so back in this very thread!) you'll see that I had a guy in my room ask me if I'd watch him hang himself for $5000.
I had no idea how serious he was, and it was the first guy I had whose words I genuinely couldn't shake out of my head. Upon some chat about it here with other girls, and some more thought - he may have been serious, he may not have been serious. There are girls who would have been willing to entertain him, likely being as they are much more clued up about fetishes such as asphyxiation, and / or, have this fetish themselves.
The most appropriate thing to do, in any case of disgust, especially if that particular fetish is very personal to you, is just to ban rather than make any judgements about them based purely on their sexual fantasies.
In truth, age play doesn't make the person fantasising about it, any more of a danger to others than a guy who fantasises about having conventional sex with a woman, or the guy who fantasises about hanging himself whilst a woman watches. There are guys who get jailed for horrific sexual crimes, who keep what could very easily be deemed as "conventional" man-on-woman porn on their laptops. There are also guys who go through life without laying a finger on anyone, who wouldn't dream of harming anyone, who keep much more hard-core, violent porn on their laptops. It's all a 'case by case' basis, rather than "Oh you have those fantasies? Well I can now predict that you may, or will in the future, go on to sexually violate someone". And so, you COULD assume that the guy who fantasises about having sex with a woman might well be rapist, and you still wouldn't be any closer to being right, than you would if you were assuming that the age play guys are child molesters, or not.
Ohh KateSwallows.. you're about to swallow a whole ton of... uhh.. somethin', with this!
Lol... that such a shit joke... I do apologise! ;D
I end up getting caught up in a tonload of anecdotes and tangents when I'm addressing topics like this, but I promise I'll try to tie it all up and link it all together. I know that this can be a massively sensitive topic, so it deserves detailing, but I'll also try to keep it as short as the dicks of guys who brag to me about their impossibly huge dicks and never show them to me...
I have wanted to understand sex since puberty; I bought my first book on sex education at 11 because I knew that doing my own research was the only way I'd get the quality of educated I wanted. I had my first orgasm as a result of buying that book. The more I read, the more it benefited my life for the better, the more I wanted to learn. My attitude towards fantasies is likely a combination of the fact that I started learning early, was extremely open to learning early, twinned with having what societal standards might deem "fucked up", myself. Previous partners of mine had either expressed discomfort regarding my sexual fantasies, or outright advised that I seek medical help for all this shit that goes on in my mind.
The strongly taboo, "forbidden fruit" nature of these fantasies, combined with me feeling outcast and condemned for them by those closest to me, actually lead to me thinking about them more. How this kind of taboo works is a little similar to the logic of if someone says to you: "Don't think of a black cat... Don't think about them. Black cats? Yeah, those.. don't think about black cats!" - and what do you do? You think about them! On top of that, having additional, very unwanted images pop up in my mind at random times of the day. They were almost like painful flash-backs of horrific sexual instances which never actually occurred, but really haunted me. These were not even things I would get off to - they were just intrusive thoughts telling me that I like them, and would violate random people sexually at any given time.
So I attended a psychiatric assessment, (I should add to secure legitimacy to the result, that the hospital I attended was Maudsley, the largest mental health training institution in the country and one of the leading psychiatric institutes in the UK), and handed the doctor a written account of all of my fantasies. I was far too scared to say them in words; I trembled like a leaf as he read. I learned that what I was going through, with the intrusive thoughts, was a form of something called Pure OCD, and told, quite frankly, to accept my sexual fantasies about all that "fucked up" stuff, and to actually indulge in fantasising about them, and that if I did, the other, troublesome ones, as well as my guilt, would fade.
I was not deemed a danger to society, on any level whatsoever, or deemed some kind of messed up lost cause and bundled into a straight jacket and thrown right in a padded cell (like I feared.) If there was any suspicion by this doctor that I could carry out my fantasies in reality, or that I posed any danger, I could rest assured that I would quite promptly be dealt with by this institute, and given the appropriate help on the basis of my thorough assessment. But since then, I dedicated more time to focussing on understanding my fantasies for the better. In the process, I wound up learning about others too. For example, I learnt that it can actually be relatively natural for mothers to have sexual thoughts about their own children. I learnt that victims of sexual crimes can wind up fantasising about the same scenario which scarred them, but with little tweaks in the fantasy which shift the power over to them instead of the predator.
Please do not take those two above examples as definitive, one-size-fits all outcomes of the experiences which pre-date them, but purely as possible examples. There are countless, limitless ways that we harness our fantasies in different ways, to negate otherwise troublesome experiences in our lives. Trauma, stress, anxiety, real helplessness, all make it difficult for us to feel aroused, and so we can take scenarios, and twist them around to accommodate feelings of safety - safe, secure, and comfortable enough for us to feel aroused... Even with all of this explaining, this post still feels so inadequate for the importance it deserves, and I'm growing more and more aware of how long this post is. But I want to throw out a book recommendation which has also served as a great source for this post: 'Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies' by Dr Michael Bader. It is without a doubt the best, and most well-explained book I've read detailing how and why we grow to obtain the fantasies we do, and why they're so varying, so specifically arousing, and so incredibly personal.
A 'quickie' regarding age play: I would be absolutely delighted to offer age roleplay in my work, if only it were permitted by Streamate. I don't find it difficult to separate age play fantasy from reality, any harder than it would be to separate, for example, a fantasy of having sex with a celebrity. It's now as natural as anything else to me. I can't be sure of how my fantasies and fetishes will change as I grow, and have children, (I am not currently a mother), but I am certain that for as long as I remember how they work, to accept them as natural. I trust my sanity and my integrity more than enough to know that violating the rights of any other human being sickens me. You can guess that I've learned that demonisation of fantasies, (from both my peers and myself), actually lead to me having them not only more frequently, but gave me additional ones, alongside feeling like I was some kind of inhuman monster.
DaisyRose - I now levy my above response to KateSwallows almost more to you than I do her. With no due respect, your view is massively detrimental, (likely more than you can even fathom), and it frightens me to think of how many more people share your opinion,
It frightens me that they're people like you who have no limit or any kind of compass of what is acceptable as well. You mentioned you had no children; good you should keep it that way as you would do them a disservice. People like you are the reasons why certain employers whose businesses pertains to children wouldn't want to hire those of us in this industry. People like you give us all a bad name.
and continue in ignorance, self-righteousness and vanity, to attempt to justify it as perfectly correct and actually moral. Being the knowledge whore that I am, give me evidence for your views, sourced from credited, qualified individuals, and I will start to take you seriously.
I could care less on whether you take me seriously or not. I do not have to offer any credible sources because I have no desire to justify nor to learn about this. There's no important reason in my life to. The fact that you saw a psychiatric doctor displays that you felt disturbed by "your thoughts" yourself and that deep down there was shame and you were either seeking help or any validation since you mentioned being shunned by those close to you. If you truly felt secure within you wouln't feel a need to justify and vehemently think everyone should to without considering their views as "ignorant, self-righteous, and vanity". I guess my perspectives were a deja vu to your past. Oh well that's something you must deal with; it's as if you're trying to convince yourself that you're okay because you question it. I don't have to justify anything when I know I have no need to.
Cam_chick
03-05-2012, 02:21 PM
You can't fault MommieLongLegs for her viewpoints on incestual roleplaying. Just because someone is involved in the sexual industry doesn't mean this is the wild wild west and that everything goes or should. People like that seriously need psychiatric help because there should no reason as to why one would entertain a fantasy like that; especially one that involves anything pertaining to being underage.
I am only choosing to respond to this particularly because it offends me on a very personal level. As a six year old, myself and my cousin who was also 6 or 7 were curious about our bodies and explored each others in this way one night. We were caught, and it led to some very confusing feelings growing up, but it also led me to have incest fantasies about cousins.
I have never and would never molest anyone or partake in incestuous relations, and I'd say the same about my cousin, though obviously I don't know the effects the situation had on him in particular. To say there is no reason why I should entertain that fantasy is just boldly inaccurate. I entertain the fantasy in my own damn mind because it gets me off, 'nuff said. I am allowed to sexually please myself in any way I want, even if that means fantasizing about incest because I am doing nothing illegal or immoral by imagining it and simply because I have imagined it doesn't mean I'd ever act on it. In fact, the idea of actually doing anything incestuous is odd to me, but it is just a sexual fantasy that stemmed from a simple childhood instance.
I don't need to see a shrink, I know why I have this fantasy and there is nothing wrong with it.
DaisyRose
03-05-2012, 02:31 PM
Argh, can't leave this alone! Must.debate.comment
"Things that are taboo and are considered shameful keeps people in line. "
Um, having sex with a sex worker is considered taboo and shameful and so is being a sex worker. By this logic than we all should be out of a job and not be sex workers.
First of all, I don't consider myself a "sex worker" as I DON'T I repeat DON'T have any sexual contact with anyone for money. The only kinds of work in which the title are the most deserving would be porn actors and/or prostitues. Being a webcam model doesn't involve any of that unless you're involved as a couple or as a group. Anything else outside of that doesn't apply so let's get that one straight. As far as having sex with a sex worker as being "taboo" that doesn't pertain to what was previously discussed as that is a whole another topic.
"Remember all these pedophiles who acted on those sick acts first had to have the fantasies."
Fantasies do not equal reality. By this logic, people who participate in BDSM activities actually wants to hurt and hold someone against their will and will eventually move on to kidnapping and torture later.
Not all fantasies become realities but all realities were first fantansies. Any action that's done began with a thought. Some people don't have impulse control or self-constraint to not further inappropriate actions and just keep in their minds. One little inch could become a mile. You baby crawl before you walk; you dip your toes in the water before you get in it. So if one becomes comfortable in the smallest of an arena (underage roleplaying) then what's to stop them to go to the more serious, more extreme, and the highest degree (raping /fondling) children? You can't control what people do but why serve as their trigger point? You can't compare pedophilia which doesn't involve consentual adults with commiting BDSM activities which let's assume is consensual with all parties being adults. Like again, as I stated in the previous point above, this doesn't pertain to what being discussed.
Although, we don't control what customers do afterwards, there is sense of decency that as camgirls we should behaves out of our duty once we are online."
Am I also responsible for ever man who says he is cheating on his wife when he is on cam? Every man who has bad sex with his wife because I've fake an orgasm? Where does this sense of decency start and end? That is one heck of a slippery slope there.
I'm talking about "decency" as it pertains to webcamming on my part and not life in general. As with anything or type of work there are guidelines or boundaries; this shouldn't be any different. As far as customers goes, I don't personalize them or with them in any way nor do I view them as anything but dollar signs. I'm not responsible for their marriages (if they are). All life aspects are irrelevant to me but their wallets. They're the ones who have to live with their actions after all live sessions with me whether it's with their wives, kids, careers, God/deity/religion, or whatever their tied down with or connected to. I don't have to answer to nor be accountable to anyone; therefore I feel no guilt. I'm not hurting anyone, them, myself, nor is what I do encourages them to do so. I offer my expression of sensuality; nothing more or less. So I feel I'm in the gray area where I'm not in the white nor black.
CarolinaBelle
03-05-2012, 03:24 PM
I am only choosing to respond to this particularly because it offends me on a very personal level. As a six year old, myself and my cousin who was also 6 or 7 were curious about our bodies and explored each others in this way one night. We were caught, and it led to some very confusing feelings growing up, but it also led me to have incest fantasies about cousins.
I have never and would never molest anyone or partake in incestuous relations, and I'd say the same about my cousin, though obviously I don't know the effects the situation had on him in particular. To say there is no reason why I should entertain that fantasy is just boldly inaccurate. I entertain the fantasy in my own damn mind because it gets me off, 'nuff said. I am allowed to sexually please myself in any way I want, even if that means fantasizing about incest because I am doing nothing illegal or immoral by imagining it and simply because I have imagined it doesn't mean I'd ever act on it. In fact, the idea of actually doing anything incestuous is odd to me, but it is just a sexual fantasy that stemmed from a simple childhood instance.
I don't need to see a shrink, I know why I have this fantasy and there is nothing wrong with it.
I think cousins are probably pretty much a grey area. I mean hell, look at the history of European royalty...they were always marrying their cousins. ;)
But on a serious note, I also "played doctor" with some of my cousins at the same age as you. I think that for a lot of us who have cousins in the same age group this is a fairly normal occurrence.
Cam_chick
03-05-2012, 04:07 PM
Not a sex worker? Alrighty then, good luck holding onto that. And as far as the whole "what's to stop them to go to the more serious, more extreme" fear mongering... Well it just tells me we are on very different pages and there is no way we are going to be changing each others minds any time soon. It also makes me think of sex with ducks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXPcBI4CJc8
shywebcamgirl
03-05-2012, 04:13 PM
As far as having sex with a sex worker as being "taboo" that doesn't pertain to what was previously discussed as that is a whole another topic.
Your statement was that some things are taboo to keep us in line. Whether you want to call yourself a 'sex worker' or a 'kazoo' having sex with your self or someone else for money is a taboo in this society. So therefore by your line of logic we should all not work our jobs since we should all be ashamed of ourselves for doing something that society says is 'wrong'.
You can't compare pedophilia which doesn't involve consentual adults with commiting BDSM activities which let's assume is consensual with all parties being adults. Like again, as I stated in the previous point above, this doesn't pertain to what being discussed.
Oh, but it does pertain though. If someone comes to a sex worker to act out their fantasty WHATEVER that fantasy may be, than it is between to consenting adults. Just like in our BDSM example.
I'm talking about "decency" as it pertains to webcamming on my part and not life in general.
See, that is the thing. Since as sex workers/kazoos/the easter bunny whatever you want to call us are outside the morals of 'normal' society than we have to use our own personal morals to guide us. I see nothing wrong with your own personal morals. The problem happens when you choose to judge other people for theirs.
You don't want to do any sort of 'dark' role-play? Awesome, more for me! But when you become the 'thought police' and start to judge WHO I AM AS A PERSON by what I will and will not role-play, that is where I object.
I have always been amused that legally I am not allowed to do incest fantasies, but I will role-playing being a catholic nun and the other person being a catholic monk since we can call each other 'sister' and 'brother' as it isn't illegal to be sacrilegious.
I will also not play anyone under 18, but I will play a 'really mentally slow' 18 year old because that isn't illegal either.
You can say that you aren't hurting anyone but for all you know you could of broken up a marriage and caused a child to be raised by a single parent just because you decided to you own sensual self.
I am not trying to change your mind on the whole role-playing issue. I am just trying to explain to you that those of us who 'dabble in the dark' are not sick, or twisted or horrible human beings. We are just like you, and everyone else. There are a lot of twisted, horrible human beings that have kill or hurt other human beings and they didn't need webcam girls, or porn, tv, or dark fantasies to do it.
So in summary, correlation does not imply causation.
Lovelyx
03-05-2012, 05:27 PM
I was tonight on SM a bit, an a member who usually come to my room to 'only talk' came again, well he was like if I get to known you more will you visit me in US and etc etc. I answer straight no hun, Im sorry but since I had started doing this of cam I keep all cam stuff out of my life. Then he asked, and what are you here for then??? I answer is very obvious, why you think girls, guys, couples, trans, etc work on camsites??? FOR MONEY. And he started to said like, I broke his heart, and I said to him 'broke your heart??? since when I give you hope of meeting you, or becoming your gf??? get real, this is a cam site not a dating site', and he like start to say to me, why you do this? what would you think if someday you have a daughter and she get to known you did webcaming and did get naked, what example as a mother you will offer to that daugther and etc etc... I answer, if I have a daughter and she gets to know that, believe me I'm not gona be the first or the last women she will saw naked. The guy says I didn't love myself for doing cam, and that ppl wont respect me for doing that, and etc etc. I answer to him, not you, not ppl, not society paids my bills, and I told you what if a normal decent secretary girl went to an Hotel and Pamela Anderson went to the same hotel, which of the two you think people who work on the Hotel will respect more??? Pamela Anderson, yes that whore who show herself naked in public instead of the decent secretary that earn $8 per hour....
I'm so tired of society trying to make us who decide to take control over our life to judge us, the guy left my room with his 'broken' heart sayin he wouldn't return (like I care) but that really piss me off, cause he tries to judge me for working for more money than what I would be earning on a 'decent' standard job, why do we need to work for cheap just to make society talk cute stuff of us, I prefer society talking crap of me but I'm earning 3 times more per hour than those who talk bad of me.
I would have blocked him as soon as he said why are you here. Don't let these guys upset you or waste your time.
xfatrabbitx
03-05-2012, 05:50 PM
People who don't see the legitimacy in our work either disagree with the adult industry, even though its a multi-billion dollar industry, or don't see you as a person. How can someone reduce anyone down who's trying to earn money into someone who's not working, and even if i wasnt working, why the fuck do you think i would talk to you. They have no respect and believe they have the place to tell you whats wrong with your life. People with this kind of behavior are morons. I really do hate when people say, what will your daughter think? Like ew, what would YOUR daughter think. You're sitting there preaching to a stranger on the internet with your dick in your hand. I will tell my kids when they're ready how hard i worked for them. And i will also raise them not to judge people, as well as not going on to internet porn sites and antagonizing women. I used to argue with idiots like this but i realized these type of men are the type that generalize, stereotype, objectify, and belittle women. I just ban them, they don't respect my work...why should they be there.
Lovelyx
03-05-2012, 05:50 PM
He left sayin he wouldn't return for the fact that's he's looking for love on a camsite pls...come on!!!. I didn't mind about the question why are you here...cause lots of guys tend to ask the same thing, what piss me off was the part if someday you have a daughter what example as a mother you will provide when she knew you were doing this and etc etc. So, just because a women decide to cam is a bad mother??? Society loved to judge a lot woman specially those one's who take charge of their life, a women can have a 'decent' job working as secretary or customer service taking crap for lots of customer and been nicely with them, while earning $8 bucks per hour, get home after 9-12 hours and have a daughter wanting to talk or play and her tired mother annoyed for all that crap of work, scream to her daugther or dont put attention to her daugther because 'im working to give you food and im tired' ...so ppl should evaluate and consider things better before judging so much.
MissKatie
03-05-2012, 06:47 PM
Chin up. He'#s a jerk and deserved the ban button the minute he opened his mouth. He KNOW'S what cam sites are for, he was just trying to push your buttons because you didn't say what he wanted to hear x
LeahBabii
03-05-2012, 07:02 PM
Don't let people get you down hun especially guys that "just want to talk" those are the worst ones.
melissahornygirl
03-05-2012, 07:19 PM
Hi sorry for the rant , Im on adultwork camming but my god I have made 6 quid in 1 hour!! so fuming and annoyed like is there any other sites i can work on that can use dailypay Im signed with mfc but how do i ask for dailypay with that??
also can anyone give me tips like to start making better money on webcamming, anything possible ladies!! I need to save up to £800 for a new place to live in , in 1 month lol!! xxx
Fridays
03-05-2012, 07:20 PM
who cares what yet another idiot thinks........
Fridays
03-05-2012, 07:22 PM
yes.. tips... this whole forum is FULL of tips...
all u gotta do is read.. read .. read..
its that easy.
melissahornygirl
03-05-2012, 07:44 PM
how do i change my free cams to dailypay option?
shywebcamgirl
03-05-2012, 08:18 PM
Most guys all seem to have the same rejection song and dance. They do it with 'normal' girls as well as camgirls. Here is how this song and dance goes:
1. They ask you to be their girlfriend (free sex!!!)
2. When you say you won't be their girlfriend they will tell you that you broke their heart (why won't you let me love you?!? Because if I manage to manipulate your feelings of guilt....I mean romance you, then you will give me the sex0r for free!)
3. When you still say no they will either go in one of two directions. You are either rejecting them because you are a prude or you are rejecting them because you are a slut. No matter if they decided you fall into the prude or slut category you will now be deemed ugly, fat and useless.
4. Rather, rinse, repeat.
I had a guy once ask me over and over and over to go out with him. I kept saying no. In frustration, I turned to one of my male friends and asked why the hell the other guy kept asking me. He said, "Don't you know that with the majority of other girls you can just wear them down if you keep asking over and over again? Most girls will only say no so many times because they are afraid of being perceived as a bitch, so therefore you can make them feel guilty enough to say yes. You are one of the rare girls that when you say no, you mean it."
I can only take an uneducated guess that webcam models are of the breed that we can say no and mean it without worrying about looking like a bitch because we have to say it so often so guys try to step their game up when it comes to trying to get free sex from us. ;)