View Full Version : STUPID annoying shit I've heard on cam....
DancesWithSloths
12-01-2016, 04:55 PM
Do you want to see a BBC dildo, a butt plug, a riding crop, a strap on, a toy car?
LMAO Believe it or not, I had somebody ask about a toy car once. (It was for a giantess role-play.) He was most put out that I didn't have one ready and waiting.
Magical_Hoohah
12-01-2016, 05:35 PM
I have three lovely toy cars for giantess roleplay, but I pretty much never get to use them. They are, however, one of my favorite "sex toys" when it comes to confusing the vanilla guys. I like to let them ponder how, where, and why I might be using them, and inevitably ask whether the wheels hurt, and what I do if it gets stuck up there. LMAO!
At a family gathering, one person who is an ER doctor mentioned the stupidest case he'd seen - an adult who managed to get one of those little green army man figurines stuck up his/her ass. It took everything I had not to wave my hand and yell "Pick me, pick me, I know the answer! I know exactly how that happened!"
LoraDoll
12-01-2016, 06:17 PM
he comes in
- how u like to play?
-- what is the question right now?
- do u like dirty games?
-- like what?
- are u a good girl, or a bad one?
-- ???
- what u prefer?
-- u telling me wtf u want maybe?!
idiot leaves.
Lizzie Borden
12-01-2016, 06:36 PM
If you ladies get "goatmonkey" in your rooms, you might want to keep tabs on him. He had been popping in and out of my room for four months, no tips, crashes pvts and quickly leaves before the 30 seconds is up. I finally was fast enough to click on him and block today. Fucker.
So true. Yeah, "what's your favorite roleplay" might be the most annoying of all. In cases when they say they don't know what roleplay they want, I'm usually like "Well, if you have no idea what you want, then obviously you're not looking for anything that's against the site rules. We can sort the rest out together in exclusive!" I don't recall it ever working out, but at least they usually shut up or leave.
IME those guys always want something taboo, they just want you to say it first... I get so impatient with these guys sometimes, weaseling around their kinks. I want to just say "look, I am a sex worker. I will not be shocked at anything you say, just spit it out so I can tell you no and we'll move on with our lives."
CreativeName
12-02-2016, 07:35 AM
I had a guy on SM today ask me if I could cry while shaming him... like dude no and if i could i'd charge $50 a minute for that shit.
Mazikeen
12-02-2016, 07:56 AM
I a guy on SM today ask me if I could cry while shaming him... like dude no and if i could i'd charge $50 a minute for that shit.
I think they ask those request just to fool around with us, no way he is serious about that, plus, who can cry at demand?
AnotherLily
12-02-2016, 10:30 AM
Guys asks for address
I give address for a police station in city & state I don't live in.
~Carmen~
12-03-2016, 07:30 AM
"I am really bored and your show are expensive so can we just chat?"
AnotherLily
12-03-2016, 01:09 PM
On SM:
JLeviBColek: Dey need to create a web cam for men so we can charge yall women lol nbs fr, ima b da first to start it
If only such a place existed...
I told him if he signs up tell 'em I sent him. I want my model referral cut.
Sunnylexie
12-03-2016, 01:47 PM
Guys asks for address
I give address for a police station in city & state I don't live in.
I recently started giving them the address/phone of a car repair station in the ass of the world.
Sunnylexie
12-03-2016, 01:54 PM
^^^Yes!! That one has been getting to me lately. Usually I get "Do you have any sexy outfits?" Um... well... you can see that I'm wearing clothes, and people keep saying how sexy I look, so.... I'm guessing that's a yes.
Similarly, "Do you have any costumes?" Now, I have a bunch of clothing items and things that can be put together into costumes, but nothing like a full Halloween costume that's sold as a unit. So I tell them that there outfits I can probably do, but I need to know what they're looking for. And the answer is always "I don't know. What do you have?" I know they're probably fishing for me to run to my closet and change into a bunch of different "costumes" so they can see, but I wish they would listen to how stupid they sound. If you don't have any idea what kind of costume you want, you obviously don't want one very badly.
"Do you have any toys? Can I see them?" also pisses me off lately. I understand that some girls don't use any toys, so the first question is valid, but when I reply "Yes, I have a lot of toys," that should be a clue that you can't see them all. When they ask to see, I usually say that it could take me upwards of an hour to show off all my toys, so I need to know what kind of toy they like. The answer is always (again) "I don't know. What do you have?" Seriously?! Do you want to see a BBC dildo, a butt plug, a riding crop, a strap on, a toy car? Or what? From now on, I think this question is going to get the toy car every time.
That's what freaks me out. They ask if I have toys, I say I do, they ask what toys those are. I tell them I have over 30 toys and ask what exactly they'd like to see, and then they leave like I just told them to fuck off because I'm too good for toys. SMH.
AnotherLily
12-03-2016, 02:16 PM
"I am really bored and your show are expensive so can we just chat?"
Idk why they think " just chatting" = I don't have to pay.
bbwbrianna
12-04-2016, 10:49 AM
Here is just some of the things from the wonderful guests of IMlive that I'm supposed to work hard to convert in free chat:
idiot1: Fart just once
idiot2: can we exchange numbers?
idiot3: show boobs for pvt
idiot4: its jabba the huts sister
idiot5: show belly
idiot5 again: no belly is free
idiot6: can u do me a favor?
idiot6 again: cant go private
idiot7: shit right now SHIT
Genoveve
12-05-2016, 05:46 PM
I had some weirdo tell me that I'm busted because my chin is fucked up. I've been trolled for a lot of things but my chin is a definite first. I honestly feel like I must be looking extra good if that's the only insult he could come up with. 8)
Chelseastevens
12-05-2016, 10:53 PM
Idk why they think " just chatting" = I don't have to pay.
Lmao, or the famous, It's my birthday BS.
Bridgetxo
12-05-2016, 11:10 PM
Him: We don't live far from each other! Do you want to hook up? (Note: I tell people a fake state)
Me: lol I don't even know what you look like
Him: True
Me: Send me a pic
Him: Okay *leaves*
Guess he was shy :D
Semyonovna
12-06-2016, 11:30 AM
during public show while i'm in action
put something in bb
damn put something in
please put something in dear god
he typed similar shit for 30min like he's insane
he really wanted me to "put something in"
Bananabunny
12-06-2016, 03:38 PM
This isn't anything specific but don't you ladies get sick of these wannabe sugar daddies or guys looking for escorts on these sites yet they are too broke to pay you your cam rate... you can't even pay for a private show and u want an escort or sugar baby????????? Fuck is wrong with ur head.
OMG YES!! I mean do you think I would go out with a broke ass guy who I barely know from the internet but can't even tip like my regulars?? Some men are such retards. I told one of these guys one day to fuck off and that I would never meet up with anyone from Chaturbate. His reply: ,,Oh but it's just like we met in a bar." HAHAHAHAHA WHAAAT ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME?? OMGGG xD
I'm glad my real life sugar daddy is better than any of these men who barely pay me on cam. Whenever he takes me to trips I can forget about my loser cam life and live the life I have always wanted }:D
LaceyCummings
12-06-2016, 05:31 PM
I want pump
I have the horny fuck
are you too sexy, I'm doing a saw you help me, want to help my dick
Let me horny
Clearly ESL, but the phrasing cracked me up
Bridgetxo
12-06-2016, 06:46 PM
I had someone who wanted to "exchange numbers" so we could keep in touch. I said sorry, the site does not allow outside contact. I can't risk having my account banned.
His reply? "They will never find out. And if they do, I am worth it."
Sometimes I really wish I could punch people through the internet.
Violethollywood
12-06-2016, 07:46 PM
I had someone who wanted to "exchange numbers" so we could keep in touch. I said sorry, the site does not allow outside contact. I can't risk having my account banned.
His reply? "They will never find out. And if they do, I am worth it."
Sometimes I really wish I could punch people through the internet.
i get these all the time.
AnotherLily
12-07-2016, 12:39 PM
* me typing to other members*
Fuckbitches: Same to as ur dad
Fuckbitches: If u got one
me: ?
*gets taken private*
Fuckbitches has logged off (reason: user left)
LOL these trolls are getting lamer and lamer.
evaeva
12-09-2016, 11:10 AM
When you repeatedly tell a customer what time you will be online and explain that you can do a pvt show in between 10-3 and then they get upset at you for not being online at 6pm to do a pvt show with them. Like...how many times can I explain this to you.
SoloDesire
12-09-2016, 11:25 AM
bsblackburn27: Go in doggy style for a tip?
Me: I perform in Private or Exclusive Chat. I don't do requested positions in free chat.
bsblackburn27: Wow
You are officially the lamest woman on this site congrats
http://i.giphy.com/QswW1yARiewa4.gif
~Carmen~
12-09-2016, 11:33 AM
bsblackburn27: Go in doggy style for a tip?
Me: I perform in Private or Exclusive Chat. I don't do requested positions in free chat.
bsblackburn27: Wow
You are officially the lamest woman on this site congrats
http://i.giphy.com/QswW1yARiewa4.gif
I thought I was the lamest! Congrats :D
livroyale
12-09-2016, 12:01 PM
I thought I was the lamest! Congrats :D
Same! I once got tagged with THE WORST. :D
Genoveve
12-09-2016, 08:01 PM
bsblackburn27: Go in doggy style for a tip?
Me: I perform in Private or Exclusive Chat. I don't do requested positions in free chat.
bsblackburn27: Wow
You are officially the lamest woman on this site congrats
I woulda said "Yeah? And how does it feel to be begging the lamest woman on the site and still getting rejected?" LOL.
MissAdriana
12-10-2016, 10:05 AM
stupid idiot *begs*
me: this is a pay to play site bb. let's go pvt!
stupid idiot: why?
OMF
This idiot requested me to bring something on camera for him to see i have that item & i asked for a tip to get up & look for the thing, previously he asked for a pair of socks i showed him cause they were handy but for this pair of specific shoes i had to dig deeper in my wardrobe in some shoe boxes & this would have taken me away cam view for a while, the idiot said i am begging for money, WHAT??!! he was begging, i was asking for a tip for his request, it's written in my room topic u moron! I blocked his sorry lame ass right away and showed middle finger on cam. Hate them beggars with attitude!
KittyCurious
12-10-2016, 04:51 PM
Flirt4Free, after a failure of an insanely cheap group
Nacho(something, I forgot the rest of the nickname): how are you baby
Me: disappointed actually
Nacho: oh why
Me: bc the group didn't gather despite the 10 cpm rate you all would get if pledged
Nacho: oh really
Me: (calculates, as if he was a primary schooler)
Nacho: I would go bb
Me: what the fuck stopped you twice when you ignored the group call?
Nacho: I didn't call it bb
Me (calls group)
nothing, WHAT A FUCKIN SURPRIZE, happens
Me: So what the hell is stopping you now, Mr I Would Pledge lol?
Nacho: lol
Nacho logs off
DAMN I HATE THEM I HATE MY STUPIDITY JUST GO AND DIE ALREADY!!!
How, HOW can they be THIS stupid, annoying, hopeless fucks?!
What is even worse, I believed that piece of a shit covered vomit!!!
GGGROARRRRR
heyho
12-11-2016, 03:41 PM
I can handle "Where are you originally from?". "What ethnicity are you?" is fine. "Which country were your parents from?" even.
But for some reason, "What type of asian are you?", like I'm some sort of geological rock feature, makes me want to punch eye sockets.
Genoveve
12-11-2016, 03:58 PM
I can handle "Where are you originally from?". "What ethnicity are you?" is fine. "Which country were your parents from?" even.
But for some reason, "What type of asian are you?", like I'm some sort of geological rock feature, makes me want to punch eye sockets.
That annoys me too and I'm not even Asian. I think it's because you can tell by how they pose the question that they have no concept of Asia to begin with, it reminds me of the guys who immediately have to know your cup size. You can tell they have no concept of bra sizing so it's like 'Why the fuck do you care so much?' Like I'm sure the guys who ask you that question couldn't even point to Cambodia on a map, let alone have probably ever even heard of Laos or Kyrgyzstan or Bhutan......
persianprincess
12-11-2016, 04:03 PM
Guy types into my chat
"****Blahrandomscreenname just tipped $10.00****
Really dude. Just really.
MissAdriana
12-11-2016, 05:13 PM
STUPID annoying shit used to be like trolling insults and remarks or newbies to the sites that don't get it yet.... but now stupid annoying shit is literally ANY QUESTION. "How are you?"* he's not a payiing custie... "will you do X in private?" Also not a paying custie. I am 1" away from not even trying to sell anymore or communicate with the fucks at all
victoriavein
12-11-2016, 07:07 PM
I was offered 5 whole tokens to not only look at, but draw a penis. That's when i decided it was time to log off cb for the day.
BadBitch
12-11-2016, 07:10 PM
I had someone who wanted to "exchange numbers" so we could keep in touch. I said sorry, the site does not allow outside contact. I can't risk having my account banned.
His reply? "They will never find out. And if they do, I am worth it."
Sometimes I really wish I could punch people through the internet.
They just don't get that cam sites are not dating sites.
BadBitch
12-11-2016, 07:15 PM
Him: Can I see your panties?
Me: For $3 Gold, I'll stand.
Him: Do you like black dick?
Me: Just staring at the screen.
Him: I have no sound. Type.
Me: Shaking my head no. I don't like this guy. I'm not typing to him.
Him: You look like a man.
Good comeback. My issue is not the comment he wrote, but that he should have come in and told me that he didn't have sound from the get-go. Don't ask me questions then when you see my mouth moving, tell me to type. First of all, I don't do anything when you bark orders at me. So..........fuck off. PS, I may look like a man, but I bet my dick is way bigger than his.
Magical_Hoohah
12-11-2016, 11:28 PM
My issue is not the comment he wrote, but that he should have come in and told me that he didn't have sound from the get-go. Don't ask me questions then when you see my mouth moving, tell me to type.
That mystifies me, too. It always goes:
Him: [question 1]
Me: [I answer out loud]
Him: [question 2]
Me: [I answer out loud]
Him: What are you saying, bb? I don't have sound.
Or worse...
Him: [question 1]
Me: [I answer out loud]
Him: bb, [question 1]
Me: [I answer out loud, again]
Him: bb, please answer me. [question 1] please type, no sound.
OMGWTF, why...? When you come in my room, it should be obvious that I'm talking out loud, and my hands are playing with my hair or my tits or something other than my keyboard, and I haven't typed a damn thing to anyone. Does he think I have psychic powers and know the status of his sound? Someday I'll stop being polite and start asking each and every one of these guys why they don't have headphones.
SoloDesire
12-12-2016, 12:43 PM
Waiting for a show on SM...
bigvic has logged on
bigvic: start doing something please
bigvic has been blocked.
http://i.giphy.com/11YdnfyG6qvuWk.gif
Bananabunny
12-12-2016, 03:27 PM
frankjones195: (tips me 1 token) can u say "hey stinky butt" and wink for me? would be cute
Me: *No reaction*
10 seconds later: (tips again 1 token) Can you hold your nose and wave with your hand in front of your face as if you smelled my stinky?
*kick and bans him*
Definitely the biggest wtf moment of this year in my cam career....Not even for 10k tokens i would do such an embarassing shit...omg I can't wait to be offline from wednesday on, go on my family trip and spend my cam money for christmas shopping and literally spoiling myself.
drearea
12-12-2016, 08:29 PM
STUPID annoying shit used to be like trolling insults and remarks or newbies to the sites that don't get it yet.... but now stupid annoying shit is literally ANY QUESTION. "How are you?"* he's not a payiing custie... "will you do X in private?" Also not a paying custie. I am 1" away from not even trying to sell anymore or communicate with the fucks at all
DUDE YESSSSSSSSSSSS
I don't give a fuck right this second, my anxiety is too damn high and I just can fucking NOT answer "how are you" for a fucking loser ass "customer" (customers consume in exchange for money, these are not those) one more time until after the new year.
I refuse. I'll let you all know how my "hru bb" strike goes.
pippapippa
12-12-2016, 10:27 PM
I want to eat your ass and make sugar cookies (hilarious rather than annoying)
I want to pour hot sauce on your ass and make chili (aghhh)
MissAdriana
12-13-2016, 09:34 AM
Hi
*I smile and say hi back*
dude leaves
Hi baby
*i type hi*
dude leaves
Hello how are you?
*ignore*
dude leaves
whats up bb?
*stare into cam and smile*
dude leaves
omf I've banned like 20 freeloading linger-ers today that I thought I could squeeze a tip out of so I've been playing nice and letting them hang out..but lately they can't even keep the chat going. GTFOH BEAT IT!
Bananabunny
12-13-2016, 05:01 PM
Dude: Hey you have beautiful hair, a beautiful nose, beautiful eyes and a beautiful body!! You're just perfect!!
Me: Thanks!
Dude: Pm? :)
I knew that after so many compliments there's going to be a big disappointment. I banned him afterwards because one of my rules is "pm = 20 tokens". I don't wanna waste my time for free on such losers. And if I am not even worth 20 tokens they can fuck off.
AnotherLily
12-15-2016, 10:43 AM
On IM
Casualoo42: dammn u even have my dog horny over here
Me: Lovely, you greet me by segueing to bestiality. Hate to inform you but it's not that type of party.
Casualoo42 flees.
evaeva
12-15-2016, 10:56 AM
This guy keeps emailing me as soon as I log on to MFC asking if we can Skype. I have already explained to him that I don't do Skype while I am logged on to MFC unless otherwise specified as that is time I have set aside to be on cam and to build a fan base etc and asked him to give me some times that he would be available to do a show so that I can set something up with him, and he emails me back in a really condescending tone,
"im asking to pay u for a long show and good money ahead of time. at some point ull have to give me priority over camming as im a paying customer with legit session while camming is just tips based."
Actually I don't have to give you priority over anything and I won't give you priority over my regulars because you've never tipped or done anything to prove you are worthy of my time so like hell am I going to leave my room with people tipping to do an hour long Skype show that you already tried to have discounted. Bye.
LaceyCummings
12-16-2016, 09:01 AM
tampaguy: get naked off the cam for me
ill go pvt
CreativeName
12-16-2016, 09:09 AM
^^ I might add pretty much 100% of guys that say "if you _________ bb i'll go pvt"
LoraDoll
12-16-2016, 01:24 PM
neptunelive : I am looking for a very very intense session
neptunelive : almost sex
A***: sounds horrible.
Almost wtf...