View Full Version : How do I Become a Financial Domme???
Nikki_Fox
09-26-2012, 12:08 PM
You should have had him buy you a years supply of tampons - maybe that would be girly enough for him - lol -then if he is a sissy boy he could keep a box and make him use them every month on himself - lol - those guys are the WORST at trying to take up your time for free - they always think their THING (fetish) is so unique blah blah that they want to discuss it with you and be sure you are what they are looking for - some domme's have an application that ask alot of up front questions to gauge if the clients interest are a match for you and to put you in control of the contact - having a standard routine for your initial contact may help you sort through the time waster's - the Niteflirt account was a good idea
but that site is a pain in the ass to figure out when you first start - once you get the hang of it though it is very handy -
Nikki_Fox
09-26-2012, 12:17 PM
double post
athenalovelace
09-27-2012, 10:07 PM
I have a question (sorry if I'm derailing this, wasn't sure whether to add in here or start a new thread), I got a message on Fetlife about being a foot slave, pay piggy, blackmail slave for me. I've never really done online domination like that and am not sure if I'm comfortable actually going through with it even though the odds of it actually being serious anyway are meh.
Is it still ok, even if I'm only considering and not officially taking him on to get some sort of compensation? I don't want things to go sour if I get some one time payment but then decide it's not something I'm ready to go through with.
Nikki_Fox
09-28-2012, 04:22 AM
If you are investing your time then receiving compensation is a must, even if you are just learning the art. If he pays you for time and you don't follow through then he should be entitled to a refund. You would probably get more feedback in the camming connection thread. There are several ladies there who are online domme's. Most of the ladies here probably have more real time experience.
Ethine
03-21-2013, 05:48 PM
I just stumbled upon Findoms, and I was wondering if any of you ladies have tried it out? How does that whole thing work?Did you guys have any luck with it, or similar sites?
GlamourRouge
03-21-2013, 06:01 PM
You can't seek them out online or in the club. The real ones will find you. There are far too many fakes who get off on the idea of giving you money, and waste your time talking about it til they get off, then giving you nothing.
FasaCorp
03-23-2013, 11:12 AM
You can't seek them out online or in the club. The real ones will find you. There are far too many fakes who get off on the idea of giving you money, and waste your time talking about it til they get off, then giving you nothing.
First of all, it takes a certain kind of woman to have the right attitude with regards to this fetish. You have to be Dominant pretty much naturally, because if you are not, a submissive man can read that in a very short time. Also, if you have done nothing but "vanilla" work (solo masturbation on cam, etc) for years/months, then true submissive men will not find you. You will be waiting pretty much forever, as financial subs tend not to frequent vanilla sites. You have to advertise yourself as a Domme all the way, even build a personal website around this theme (you can't rely on "CamSite" customers for this type of thing, believe me. That clientele is inherently cheap).
Second, you have to realize that the door swings both ways. When a submissive man is scammed financially (as is obviously the case with findom) he has the potential to lose far, FAR more than mere wasted time. A Domme only loses time. A sub loses both time and money.
This fetish can get pretty complicated because it deals directly with money. Because of that, it lends itself to more scammers, fakes, and overall scumbags (both men and women) than any other fetish. It's basically a conman's "dream" fetish in the Online world where nobody ever meets face to face and identities remain secret on both ends.
Anyway, to the OP: I hope my input helps. All I can tell you is read as much on the subject as you can, from both subs and Dommes perspectives, before you get your feet wet.
Deaddolly
03-23-2013, 11:40 AM
Don't join that Findoms website it's just a waste of time and a bunch of drama. You can easily make money without it. Set up an ignore line on NF maybe a C4S and a website and you're all set.
Like mentioned before unless you're really dedicated I don't think it'd be worth your time unless you are already a natural dominant or into BDSM (understand the way of thinking regarding power exchange). Yes it can be learned but its much more easier when it comes naturally.
I've never tried the FD thing until recently but I've been into BDSM for some time (I'm a domme) so it wasn't a stretch. It's extremely over-saturated right now. But you never know until you give it a shot. So many teenagers 18/19 who just want money and know NOTHING about BDSM or the psychological aspect that will keep subs coming back.
Yes they're there to serve you but they have to enjoy it as well. You have to create the experience.And at the same time these girls don't know how to interact with them properly. And it leaves the true financial slaves wary of Findoms in general. I think it'd much easier to FD in real time. Although that is a bit risky.
(In my personal life I believe it's the sub that is truly in control since they give consent to be controlled. I have the attitude in that I don't let people top from the bottom but I don't use it as an excuse to be a bully I pick things I solely like but also pick things the sub would enjoy as well.) So I think that is something to think about.
Deaddolly
03-23-2013, 11:49 AM
Also if you don't make at least $1,000 dollars in 3 months I'd call it quits.
FasaCorp
03-23-2013, 11:49 AM
I think it'd much easier to FD in real time. Although that is a bit risky.
A big part of the reason why I began visiting Strip Clubs was because I came to the same conclusion, after getting burned out online. If I discover a naturally dominant dancer, then the context is pretty much already set up (she is there to take my money and dominant to boot). The VIP session practically unfolds on its own.
Deaddolly
03-23-2013, 12:47 PM
A big part of the reason why I began visiting Strip Clubs was because I came to the same conclusion, after getting burned out online. If I discover a naturally dominant dancer, then the context is pretty much already set up (she is there to take my money and dominant to boot). The VIP session practically unfolds on its own.
I think the SC would be the best environment to find potential subs since it's controlled. And you mentioned the scene is already set. Navigating the BDSM world for someone new isn't the best thing. It's full of scammers, timewasters and people that want to take advantage and abuse under the guise of BDSM. Even people with references sometime turn out :\ However in time its easy to avoid.
FasaCorp
03-24-2013, 07:06 AM
(In my personal life I believe it's the sub that is truly in control since they give consent to be controlled. I have the attitude in that I don't let people top from the bottom but I don't use it as an excuse to be a bully I pick things I solely like but also pick things the sub would enjoy as well.) So I think that is something to think about.
I believe that the term "Financial Domination" needs to be changed to "Financial Submission", as it is ultimately up to the sub to decide whether or not to take the plunge and submit his finances. If you think about it, the Sugar Daddy/Baby relationship is not too different from this fetish at least where wealthy men are concerned. They can afford to lose a great deal and "pretend" that it was a large percentage of their income.
A man that makes only 24k a year who submits a full 50 percent of that income to a Domme, I believe, is far more valuable than a man who makes 240k a year and only submits 5 percent of that (they both work out to 12k a year submitted). Even though they are the same amount, one is sacrificing far more and therefore places more value on the Domme/sub relationship.
I suppose one of the problems Dommes face is the uncertainty of that value-placement, as it is difficult to ascertain.
Ethine
03-24-2013, 09:46 PM
(In my personal life I believe it's the sub that is truly in control since they give consent to be controlled. I have the attitude in that I don't let people top from the bottom but I don't use it as an excuse to be a bully I pick things I solely like but also pick things the sub would enjoy as well.) So I think that is something to think about.
Absolutely, the sub in a relationship is always the one calling the shots! Ultimately, nobody would be having any kind of scene without the bottom player consenting and participating, and it's always a joy to have someone submit to you.
Ethine
03-24-2013, 10:01 PM
Thank you all for the awesome advice and insight!
I'm not terribly new to BDSM, as it's something I'm into myself. That said, I only have a tiny bit of experience with findomme'ing. I met this guy on OkCupid, of all places, and while he doesn't do tributes, he's into small gifts and all that jazz. It's been pretty rad, and he seems to be having a pretty good time, so hopefully I'm not the worst fintop in the whole wide world. *fingers crossed*
It's been a bit of a bummer trying to meet other submissive men in the club, since so many more dudes are into submissive Ethine, rather than dominant Ethine. :/
But yeah, it would be kinda nice to be able to make money with kink, just because it's a personal interest and honestly just pretty fun to do.
Deaddolly
03-26-2013, 12:29 AM
Thank you all for the awesome advice and insight!
I'm not terribly new to BDSM, as it's something I'm into myself. That said, I only have a tiny bit of experience with findomme'ing. I met this guy on OkCupid, of all places, and while he doesn't do tributes, he's into small gifts and all that jazz. It's been pretty rad, and he seems to be having a pretty good time, so hopefully I'm not the worst fintop in the whole wide world. *fingers crossed*
It's been a bit of a bummer trying to meet other submissive men in the club, since so many more dudes are into submissive Ethine, rather than dominant Ethine. :/
But yeah, it would be kinda nice to be able to make money with kink, just because it's a personal interest and honestly just pretty fun to do.
Awesome that you're BDSM. It'll be natural then. Too bad the SC isn't working for you. Most guys there are into subs but you might run into a few guys here and there.
That's cool about finding the guy on OKC. I think that's just fine :) (potential guys are everywhere)
I hope that you're majorly successful.
I think one should enjoy the experience/gifts that come every now and then along the way when a sub is found. Just as you are. Thinking about all the money and gifts other girls are getting will drive you crazy.
Don't feel bad about yourself if things aren't going as well. It has nothing to do with you. It's very saturated, there's lots of fakes, and also girls that cater to their subs/give cam shows.
LicentiousLibertine
06-07-2013, 09:14 AM
Thank you all for the awesome advice and insight!
I'm not terribly new to BDSM, as it's something I'm into myself. That said, I only have a tiny bit of experience with findomme'ing. I met this guy on OkCupid, of all places, and while he doesn't do tributes, he's into small gifts and all that jazz. It's been pretty rad, and he seems to be having a pretty good time, so hopefully I'm not the worst fintop in the whole wide world. *fingers crossed*
It's been a bit of a bummer trying to meet other submissive men in the club, since so many more dudes are into submissive Ethine, rather than dominant Ethine. :/
But yeah, it would be kinda nice to be able to make money with kink, just because it's a personal interest and honestly just pretty fun to do.
I am also not new to BDSM, being a Mistress myself. The one thing I've noticed is that BDSM-oriented people seem to get a great deal more fakes, timewasters and general riff-raff than straight up vanilla people. Guys will think nothing of doing the "Hi Mistress" shtick and wasting your time. The people who have said the true subs will find you are correct. But it takes time. This entire fetish and lifestyle takes time. If a guy tells you that he " doesn't have any money until next Friday" just ban him now. Findoms.com is pointless because it seems to be filled with nothing but annoying eighteen-year old girls who don't understand that this fetish is about a great deal more than just saying "Give me money loser". These girls make the rest of us look bad and should be piled onto a pyre and covered with dollar bills as fake as they are.
My advice is get your own website as it is the only way in which guys looking for it will take you seriously. Also, try Niteflirt.
PS- Good to see others that are into BDSM for more than just a way to make money.
LolaBohemia
04-16-2014, 11:38 AM
oh christ.
If you don't understand what is behind D/s or TPE then don't call anything you do domination or yourself a Domme. Period.
Just don't.
That's like saying you are a professor and you are illiterate.
Practicing any sort of BDSM and not knowing what you are doing can be harmful to those on the other end and also give a bad name to those who are actually experienced and legit.
To me it's the same thing as catching a girl who says she is doing live shows and is just playing a looped video.
It's dishonest.
Educate yourself.
GlamourRouge
04-16-2014, 01:27 PM
oh christ.
If you don't understand what is behind D/s or TPE then don't call anything you do domination or yourself a Domme. Period.
Just don't.
That's like saying you are a professor and you are illiterate.
Practicing any sort of BDSM and not knowing what you are doing can be harmful to those on the other end and also give a bad name to those who are actually experienced and legit.
To me it's the same thing as catching a girl who says she is doing live shows and is just playing a looped video.
It's dishonest.
Educate yourself.
But at the same time, just because you don't do things a certain way that everyone else does them, doesn't mean AT ALL, that you are uneducated about how to do things. It just means that you prefer to carve your own path rather than follow in the footsteps of thousands before you. And honestly, carving your own path is often far more lucrative.
There is absolutely no way to look at a girl and know if she knows what she's doing or not. She might be using a different technique than your own. You can't know if she is an ~*insta-domme*~ or a real fetishist who leads that kind of life in private. And honestly, its her choice to do either anyway. But not everyone is interested in putting their entire personal life on the internet for someone to be able to tell how they really live their life.
That being said, this thread is two years old so I would think it would have run its course. Findom guys will come to you OP once you set the bait for them and exude yourself a certain way. Total psychology thing. You can't really go out and find them, more like you have to wait for them to come to you, and they will if you play your cards right and set yourself apart from others.
GlamourRouge
04-16-2014, 02:28 PM
I don't understand why some dommes get so huffy over 'real dommes' vs 'fake dommes.' It's webcamming, it's all roleplay. If a guy wants me to dance during a show and I do it am I misleading him because I am not that big of a dancer irl? If a guy wants me to roleplay as his mother am I misleading him because I have not actually been a mother irl and therefor can't correctly mother him? The majority of domme customers do not take it as dead seriously as so many of these dommes do I swear. And like Glamour Rouge said it's all subjective anyway, there is no one right way to do anything.
Tooooootally agree.
Unfortunately, and this has happened more than once, I have had cam girls (ones who tell me who they are, too!) come into my room and tell me how I'm domming is ~*wrong*~ and that I don't know what I'm doing. When, I actually know exactly what I'm doing and have studied psych at an undergrad and grad level, as well as in my personal life, I lead a more fetishist lifestyle off the camera, and have had clients IRL. I lived in SF, a fetish capital, and I literally ONLY hang out with sexworkers and fetishist. That is my life. So how do I not know what I'm doing?! My income and majority repeat shows should show that I do know what I'm doing.
Yet somehow, because I bleach my black hair blonde and my energy/aura is super feminine instead of harsh, suddenly I ~*am a product of 50 shades of grey*~. A book I have never even read and don't care about. No. I'm dressing how I want, acting how I want, confident in who I am and what I'm doing. Not only am I happy, happy men flock to me and spend.
And really, do you think I'd really attract a bunch of sissies and adult babies if I didn't look this feminine? Hellllll no. And those ar like 2 of the 4 types of best spender regulars I have. What's so wrong with being a feminine pinup domme? Nothing.
But still, I've had multiple cam girl dommes come into my room and do this to me at different times. Especially this year. Is it jealousy? Like what do they care so much about ME? Do they want to work with me or be my friend? Lol just tell me that then or something. Like I do not get it. If I didn't like something SOMEONE ELSE was doing, I would laugh and not care anymore, or never care to begin with.
Sorry, I'm passionate about this because it has happened so much to me recently.
GlamourRouge
04-16-2014, 03:37 PM
I have a very Barbie look and the majority of my clients are subs. I feel like for them it is actually more embarrassing to be able to be dominated by someone who looks as non-threatening and girly as I do.
Same. The dommes with the black or bright hair, harsh vocal tones, who are always wearing black latex... that type, well they need to realize that dommes can come in many flavors. I was that kind of domme in my teens, back when I was gothy, but I'm not that kind of girl now.
Subs LOVE the blonde hair big tits thing, I'm happier with that look, and it makes me the most money. Not all subs like it, but many and maybe even most do. Especially sissies and adult babies. Cuckolds too, since they always have some weird thing about black guys, and they fetishize black guys with blondes. I capitalize off these things. Those type of subs (sissies, adult babies, cuckolds) often want someone who looks extra feminine because that is what they idolize.
I don't why this thread was even revived?
It's just silly. One of the most awesome real life dommes I ever had the pleasure to know topped in pink overalls. I am into D/s in real life have been since my teen years. Real life and online are so different. I mean even among in person professionals there are some who are not dominant in their personal lives there is nothing wrong with that at all.
Online and real time are very different things. yes I keep it safe and sane online but many online guys are looking for a fantasy of D/s not real TPE, and that's okay. As long as everyone in consenting and nobody is hurt, fine.
There are many dommes who do things differently than I and many who I am different than. As long as we are hurting nobody what is the problem. Most of my friends in D/s world and I do things differently, it does not prevent us from getting along.
As to looks I will look anyway I damned well please. I have gone on cam in a fucking Batman t-shirt, why because I fucking can, and it suited my mood. I still did sessions. There are days when I feel like corsets and days when I don't. I mostly don't. Again so what? My subs are satisfied. A client will choose a domme who suits him same as IRL. Oh and IRL somtimes this shit is worse. I won't even talk about the BS I used to encounter a black domme, because it's off topic and we don't even have the time.
The one thing that I think does piss people off is that subs expect all dommes to be the same. So a sub will say well Mistress so and so do x for me, why won't you? This isn't the fault of the domme for being different this the fault of the sub for being silly enough to think there is only one way. It's easily handled and shit it happens IRL.
As to "insta-dommes" to me an insta is someone who know nothing refuses to learns and then goes off willy-nilly doing whatever. It's someone who doesn't know what a sissy or sph is but says she does it all. There are a bad shitty vanilla cam girls too. There will always be people who suck and half-ass it. Not my concern, until they steal my text and put it on their site and try to be me. I shut that shit down but it happens quite a bit and it build resentment but we were all new and had to learn once.
I have explored many types of domination in the last 20 years. There was a time when I was all about the fetish gear and I still enjoy it once in a while, but now I enjoy just dressing up and being hot and indulging my forced femme and bi fetishes.
Seriously why are we arguing? Dommes come in all shapes and sizes and styles.
I know that was rambly but it just bugs the fuck out of me to see this tired as debate time and time again.
Can't we all just sip some wine and rule world?
SexyForMe17
04-21-2014, 02:39 AM
There are definitely guides for amateurs. The first book you need is called Dance World How to Make it Yours by Carmen Monique. It has comebacks to all of those questions guys ask over and over again, how to counter their excuses And it is very entertaining. The second book also by Carmen Monique is called Entice Me Get the Look That Will Enchant Him. This book is a guide on how to look expensive, do your make up properly and which looks attract what type of customers. The first book can also tell you how to tell if a guy will spend money in literally one sentence! U can get both books for $6. These are ebooks on Amazon.
DonaDiabla
04-21-2014, 03:39 AM
SexyForMe17, I am sorry but those books are for girls who are mainly erotic dancers who need help with their hustle...it would not really help someone to become a Professional Financial Domme. Do you know there are many different forms of adult work, right? Ladies and gentlemen, would have to study and learn thru trial and error in order to become good in the adult industry. Domme work is some of the hardest forms of adult work because you are really exploring a man's mind. Plus real-life training and online training of subs are two different animals. Frankly, findom is one of the fetishes that one develop along with another fetish. There are many different domme books out there for people looking to study on how to become a good domme. Just like there are many different books on how to become a better erotic dancer, pole dancer, burlesque dancer, pso, adult affiliate marketer, and so forth. Also to become great you need trial and error in order to become better.
There are definitely guides for amateurs. The first book you need is called Dance World How to Make it Yours by Carmen Monique. It has comebacks to all of those questions guys ask over and over again, how to counter their excuses And it is very entertaining. The second book also by Carmen Monique is called Entice Me Get the Look That Will Enchant Him. This book is a guide on how to look expensive, do your make up properly and which looks attract what type of customers. The first book can also tell you how to tell if a guy will spend money in literally one sentence! U can get both books for $6. These are ebooks on Amazon.
SexyForMe17
04-23-2014, 01:35 AM
Very true. I was just thinking dancing. I forget there are cam girls and stuff on here.
xXMamiXx
09-18-2014, 12:20 PM
Hello Ladies
slightly off topic but struggling to find answers
I hope you are all well and feeling good and productive : ) ...I havent' been here on a while...
I wondered if anyone could perhaps give advice on being a Pro-Domina in the states...
I'm in the UK and have been taking sessions (online and also in and out calls for now (hotels, rented dungeons) - haven't had 'authentic' dungeon experience just practiced in my own way and curiosity).
Regardless of that, i'm visiting LA for three months, and I'm wondering, where do I advertise in the states?
Here I use AdultWork and that gives me paid for featuring advertising, and i'm generating clients nicely out of it. Shame, since i'm upping and leaving !! (I fly next month - in massive need of a total break and separation from my life recently here)
Are there any preferential sites to advertise on ? I know Craigslist is a thing but that equates to what we used to have here called Gumtree - which was slightly sketchy ? AdultWork obiously has the escort feature and that's what i use to be found as a Pro-Domina, and feature in whatever area i choose... anything like that?
Would love some advice on this if you have any ! I have a twitter following and website that i'm launching, also some webcam accounts... so just need to work out where to plant it all..
Many thanks in advance for anything and my best wishes as always x x
LolaBohemia
09-18-2014, 12:53 PM
There is a HUGE reason why I am passionate about this matter and it really boils down to one thing.
Safety.
For both parties. However it is namely the sub that is at risk by a younger inexperienced (and utilizing the term) "insta-dommes" doing an online session and not having training, experiencing, basic coaching or mentorship to back up her claim to being 1. a Domme and 2. a Professional. This is why I care...I want people to be safe. Of course, I've been met with the argument of "Well, these are grown men and they should be responsible for themselves." True. they should. They should also be encouraged to do their research on picking out a proper Domme whether as a good match or one that really represents what she stands for and claims as her expertise.
Financial Domination is simply one facet of Domination at large. Going right into trying to do this without understanding what Domination is at it's core will make it near impossible to actually truly represent the fetish. Based on my personal experience those that have spent time researching, learning, asking questions, and being real to themselves have generally made a larger income than those who dove right into it as well as lasting longer in this field. FinDom is supplementary to whatever Power Play sessions I may offer and in the end I tend to walk away with a large lump sum as opposed to a few amazon GC's as well as a client or sub that feels they truly got something out of the session.
I speak of this and it's not like I keep information secret. I continually put myself out there as a mentor, someone to use as a resource, and a possible coach. I want you ladies to have legit information to be able to offer sessions and experiences that are more enjoyable to you and to the person who sought it out. Having a truly Dominant personality also makes a world of difference because THEY CAN TELL. If you are assuming a role, it's obvious.
If you want to get into the fetish of FinDom know that it's important to offer and understand other ways to utilize power exchange as well as how your unique style of Dominance makes those sessions memorable and real.
I may add more later.
LolaBohemia
09-18-2014, 01:07 PM
But at the same time, just because you don't do things a certain way that everyone else does them, doesn't mean AT ALL, that you are uneducated about how to do things. It just means that you prefer to carve your own path rather than follow in the footsteps of thousands before you. And honestly, carving your own path is often far more lucrative.
There is absolutely no way to look at a girl and know if she knows what she's doing or not. She might be using a different technique than your own. You can't know if she is an ~*insta-domme*~ or a real fetishist who leads that kind of life in private. And honestly, its her choice to do either anyway. But not everyone is interested in putting their entire personal life on the internet for someone to be able to tell how they really live their life.
That being said, this thread is two years old so I would think it would have run its course. Findom guys will come to you OP once you set the bait for them and exude yourself a certain way. Total psychology thing. You can't really go out and find them, more like you have to wait for them to come to you, and they will if you play your cards right and set yourself apart from others.
I never once spoke of appearance. What I wear on cam is really what I'd wear out at night but perhaps a little more provocative. I know my appearance on cam is irrelevant because what I offer is mostly very mental/cerebral.
I would hope someone wouldn't put their whole personal life on the internet. I do tell people that I am Pro and Lifestyle because there are some subs out there who want a Lifestyle Domme. Someone who has done this in their personal life to some degree and thus has a different experience. This can also encourage those subs who want to explore themselves more to do so guided by a Domme that participates in the lifestyle herself.
Personally, I feel that a Domme, over the years, through learning, observing, education, and mentorship, carves her own path. It naturally happens. Especially with the passion to learn more and really build on that which is natural within her. Again, more lifestyle than Pro but I feel it's crucial for a Pro to at least understand the lifestyle even if they aren't a part of it.
MissConceited
09-18-2014, 01:31 PM
I would agree with Lola. Being a Domme is not something someone can just one day say they are. It is a craft and financial domination is just a single aspect. Too many people jump in and ruin vulnerable guys because they are not educated and make us all look bad. In real time I hardly even mention findom because it scares guys away. A lot of ladies claiming to be "findoms" are borderline psychopaths who don't care about whether or not a boy has a safeword or what SSC even means. If you are playing SSC(safe, sane, and consensually), you wouldn't chop off a guy's dick because he asks you too. Guys say ridiculous things when they are in sub space, and when a guy is there he may want to do things that aren't necessarily safe nor sane. It's up to the Domme to take control and not just give in to what the guy wants because it may not be good for him. Being a Findom also requires a TON of self control, and draining a guy until he's broke shows you have absolutely no remorse. It has nothing to do with real or fake, but the fact that lots of ladies jump in uneducated while guys are putting their livelihoods in their hands. Would you want to go to a surgeon who never went to med school? Have fun with that.
xXMamiXx
09-18-2014, 01:32 PM
Hi La Bohemia
Not sure if your post was a response to me or not ? If it was, thank you for the prompt response. A lot of what you are saying is for a complete newbie so I'm not sure It is for me. I am passionate about my craft and my website and following are pretty grass roots. I absolutely adore the karma in action that Female Supremacy brings, and my subs have thus far received my persona and the work I do very well. I have sampled being sub in various situations, also with a Pro-Domina. I am also in total agreement with you, that risk aware, consensual play, is of prime importance.
Would it be better if I start a new thread for this Q ? It's quite a serious question for me in the next stage of my journey !
Thanks
Z x
xXMamiXx
09-18-2014, 02:03 PM
...Laaaarda mercy
I will take it those posts weren't for me. I have come up with some ideas and am happy for anyone to contact me if they want to know what info I got back in response to my question. May or may not post it as a separate thread later on.
Peace x
MissConceited
09-18-2014, 02:12 PM
I'll just say that right now I'm in the 95th percentile on nf, and you won't believe how many guys are glad that 1. I'm not acting my dominance and I am an actual pro and 2. I play safe. If you have to fake it to be into it you're not gonna have a good time. Demanding princesses are a dime a dozen.
xXMamiXx
09-18-2014, 02:20 PM
I'm a going for a sado-maternal-goddess vibe, generally. But a lot of it depends on what my clients fantasize when they see me and me nurturing them through their kinks and how they feel about them. I love it. I'm going more for Real Time than Online, however... my website will allow for online play, but that's not really what I'm going for. My website is just for gravy money.
I've looked for what escorts and similar advertise, much in the way they do here, to see if Pro-Domina's use the same sites. Some look good, others less. Equally, I have already found potential customers I'm engaging for when I land through target-marketting.
Super excited about the next levels as I have a 5 year plan I can't wait to smash !!
Best and thanks x
LolaBohemia
09-18-2014, 02:53 PM
I'm a going for a sado-maternal-goddess vibe, generally. But a lot of it depends on what my clients fantasize when they see me and me nurturing them through their kinks and how they feel about them. I love it. I'm going more for Real Time than Online, however... my website will allow for online play, but that's not really what I'm going for. My website is just for gravy money.
I've looked for what escorts and similar advertise, much in the way they do here, to see if Pro-Domina's use the same sites. Some look good, others less. Equally, I have already found potential customers I'm engaging for when I land through target-marketting.
Super excited about the next levels as I have a 5 year plan I can't wait to smash !!
Best and thanks x
Sado-maternal just put "Mommy Dearest" in my head. Make them prune the hedges at 2am.
I'm so fucking with you. ;p
xXMamiXx
09-18-2014, 03:37 PM
mahahaha it's the boobies and these subs are just so greedy and needy so they all seem like little boys to me ! it works insofar as playing with the tempo goes but i just try to cater to their fetishes and have a good time... for me it's a deeper spiritual thing the power exchange and even as Pro-Domina : )
WintersKiss
11-18-2014, 05:59 PM
I guess thread revival is in order...
I feel like a lot of flack got passed around here and a few (frustrated, but helpful) ladies did touch a bit on the answer... As someone who's been interested in and studied BDSM from a mostly submissive side, I'd say that I'm definitely lost when it comes to thinking about being a Domme. I know it's in me, I honestly think there's a sexy, controlling dominatrix in all women, but I'm rather unsure about how to go about both educating myself and putting myself out there as one who can be dominant. I sniffled a bit reading through because I do more identify with the spoiled princess, sort of "bratty or demanding" type. I'd probably fall into the category, but I don't think there's such a term as "FinSub". lol
So... I suppose my question to you experienced ladies is: What do you do if you want to break into being a Domme, specializing in Findom, but you don't really know where to start? So many places here say that when trying something new you'll never know how it goes until you just do it... but, being dominant (whether in person or online) is such a delicate subject... if you don't know what you're doing, you can really screw yourself or someone else over. Mentors that actually want to be helpful/know how to help a person are hard to come by. I for one, wish i knew someone that could walk me through some things.
And furthermore... isn't it a little unfair to harp on "newbs" and "instadoms"? If someone wants to do something for the first time, does that automatically make them a poser or not genuine? Just because you don't know anything about a certain subject doesn't make a person any less interested. All of you were first time domme's or even first time camgirls at some point. I don't think its right to call someone out on their ignorance if they're putting forth the effort to change it.
DonaDiabla
11-18-2014, 11:20 PM
WintersKiss, if you want to get started as a online findom...then you should join http://findoms.net/ and they will help learn something about financial domination. You could also start on second life as findom. You can talk to Dee Kass about becoming a findom at Jinxies. I am a findom on Second Life among other things. Actually, you never know if there is a finsub :) Many people do not know there are professional submissives out there. Now, becoming a in person findom is a totally different animal than online findoms. Just like being a virtual findom is different than being an online findom. Many dominatrixes and male doms do all three forms of findom including virtual financial domination in virtual worlds such as Imvu and second Life. I like Second life ten times better than IMVU when starting your virtual findom career. IMVU allows for people more freedom but they have more freeloaders there as well. You can also try rinsing on Twitter as well. I learned that some British chicks on facebook. I did some rinsing and receive some good gifts this year :)
I guess thread revival is in order...
I feel like a lot of flack got passed around here and a few (frustrated, but helpful) ladies did touch a bit on the answer... As someone who's been interested in and studied BDSM from a mostly submissive side, I'd say that I'm definitely lost when it comes to thinking about being a Domme. I know it's in me, I honestly think there's a sexy, controlling dominatrix in all women, but I'm rather unsure about how to go about both educating myself and putting myself out there as one who can be dominant. I sniffled a bit reading through because I do more identify with the spoiled princess, sort of "bratty or demanding" type. I'd probably fall into the category, but I don't think there's such a term as "FinSub". lol
So... I suppose my question to you experienced ladies is: What do you do if you want to break into being a Domme, specializing in Findom, but you don't really know where to start? So many places here say that when trying something new you'll never know how it goes until you just do it... but, being dominant (whether in person or online) is such a delicate subject... if you don't know what you're doing, you can really screw yourself or someone else over. Mentors that actually want to be helpful/know how to help a person are hard to come by. I for one, wish i knew someone that could walk me through some things.
And furthermore... isn't it a little unfair to harp on "newbs" and "instadoms"? If someone wants to do something for the first time, does that automatically make them a poser or not genuine? Just because you don't know anything about a certain subject doesn't make a person any less interested. All of you were first time domme's or even first time camgirls at some point. I don't think its right to call someone out on their ignorance if they're putting forth the effort to change it.
WintersKiss
11-19-2014, 09:09 AM
WintersKiss, if you want to get started as a online findom...then you should join http://findoms.net/ and they will help learn something about financial domination. You could also start on second life as findom. You can talk to Dee Kass about becoming a findom at Jinxies. I am a findom on Second Life among other things. Actually, you never know if there is a finsub :) Many people do not know there are professional submissives out there. Now, becoming a in person findom is a totally different animal than online findoms. Just like being a virtual findom is different than being an online findom. Many dominatrixes and male doms do all three forms of findom including virtual financial domination in virtual worlds such as Imvu and second Life. I like Second life ten times better than IMVU when starting your virtual findom career. IMVU allows for people more freedom but they have more freeloaders there as well. You can also try rinsing on Twitter as well. I learned that some British chicks on facebook. I did some rinsing and receive some good gifts this year :)
Thank you so much. :D I'll have to check that site out. I'd love to start doing findom in SL, but ahem... as I stated in one of my more recent posts (different thread) I'm not on exactly good terms with Miss Dee. Though I did work at Jinxies for over a year. ;)
SL is near and dear to my heart, I've been there for almost 5 years now. I was a text only escort for a very long time and in the past year I've been doing mostly voice. Dee Kass is the woman with a plan if you really want to make money, but after working for/with her for over a year... let me just tell you, she isn't all tits and giggles to deal with. Her rules are strict and her patience is thin, at least for her in-club girls.. i can't really say I know how she treats her cam models, I was never on that side of room. If you want the potential to make good money, she's your best bet... but most women/girls can't handle her for more than a few weeks. She is a tough person to get along with. I'm a pretty easy going person, but our differences were too great and I don't work with her anymore despite the fact that I still count her as a role model.
Other than that, SL is fun and a pretty awesome place to explore. My laptop s pretty crap lately, so it's hard for me to be active. But, if you find some regulars and get yourself out there the money will come.
If you'd like to chat in world or maybe just need to be shown around, send me a PM. I love new friends. :D
Oooh, whats rinsing? lol I feel a google coming on. xD Can't wait to do more research when i get home tomorrow morning. Ugh, why shall this day be so long...
Thank you so much Dona, you rock my socks. :D
lady_footsie
11-20-2014, 10:20 PM
I've been skirting around this kind of industry since about 2009 or so, when I got into fetish clips on C4S. To be entirely honest, I got too bored and lazy to make enough consistent money from this after about three years, so looked elsewhere and stumbled completely by accident into findom. I was SO baffled by this guy who kept begging me to step on him and taking his money. lol. I started small and with guilt whenever I took his money. $50. Then another $50. Then $150. Then $300, all in an hour. I became addicted but...it's NOT easy. I joined collarme (now collarspace) and I'd say about 90% of the so-called finsubs on there are all talk. I also found the ones who don't mention anything about money in their profiles turned out to be the ones who actually were GOOD finsubs! I got $1,300 out of one particular guy in three days before he vanished. That's the other thing to keep in mind - they generally don't hang around. They'd go broke if they did.
I don't consider online findomming a viable long term stable income earner. I've done it on and off for 18 months and every now and then I go around various websites (locanto, craigslist, collarspace, various forums) and milk some of the more "I am a pathetic loser" guys for a few weeks before they dry up and I get bored again.
I wouldn't know how to go about being a real time / in person findomme. I don't quite understand what you'd do! Just take them shopping? Walk around with them on a leash and their wallet in their mouth? lol Unless there's some other BDSM aspect going on that they're doing to get more of their humiliation / loser needs satisfied AND the paying for the honour of it, I don't really see the point for them.
Also, for every genuine finsub, there are probably about 50 hungry findommes out there. ;) Including me. But I don't try very hard. Heheh.
DonaDiabla
11-21-2014, 12:06 AM
Actually, I would like to comment on you saying that online findomming is not a viable long term stable income earner. Many of women earn a great income from online findomming. But that should not be the only thing in your skill set as domme. Many dommes and subs take this fetish very seriously. First, collarme and craigslist not are great websites for long term findom subs. Secondly, it seems like you do not understand the psychological aspect of financial domination for your subs. Being an in-person findom is about a lot more than just being a bratty princess and demanding money.In fact, that is not good long-term online findomming as well because you are casting yourself in the instant domme light even if you are not. Being a stereotypical domme character might work on newbie subs or jaded older subs. But it is not a real ticket for long-term success in most cases. I look towards great courtesans such as La Belle Otero and La Paiva who had tons of great findom qualities. They developed a great formula about getting into a man's mind by breaking his wallet. For example, La Paiva became both the greatest courtesan with findom qualities ever just by having her iron well and being a money succubus. In addition, most dommes who do findom also have different fetishes as well like foot fetishes and so forth. As far as your comments about real-time findomming. :) Just because you do not know what in real life does mean that other girls do not know. For example,I know have do findom sessions both in real time and online. If I was you, I would look at Miss FOXX UK because she does online and real-time financial domination. She used to have a great youtube channel. Here is her website: http://missfoxx.co.uk
I've been skirting around this kind of industry since about 2009 or so, when I got into fetish clips on C4S. To be entirely honest, I got too bored and lazy to make enough consistent money from this after about three years, so looked elsewhere and stumbled completely by accident into findom. I was SO baffled by this guy who kept begging me to step on him and taking his money. lol. I started small and with guilt whenever I took his money. $50. Then another $50. Then $150. Then $300, all in an hour. I became addicted but...it's NOT easy. I joined collarme (now collarspace) and I'd say about 90% of the so-called finsubs on there are all talk. I also found the ones who don't mention anything about money in their profiles turned out to be the ones who actually were GOOD finsubs! I got $1,300 out of one particular guy in three days before he vanished. That's the other thing to keep in mind - they generally don't hang around. They'd go broke if they did.
I don't consider online findomming a viable long term stable income earner. I've done it on and off for 18 months and every now and then I go around various websites (locanto, craigslist, collarspace, various forums) and milk some of the more "I am a pathetic loser" guys for a few weeks before they dry up and I get bored again.
I wouldn't know how to go about being a real time / in person findomme. I don't quite understand what you'd do! Just take them shopping? Walk around with them on a leash and their wallet in their mouth? lol Unless there's some other BDSM aspect going on that they're doing to get more of their humiliation / loser needs satisfied AND the paying for the honour of it, I don't really see the point for them.
Also, for every genuine finsub, there are probably about 50 hungry findommes out there. ;) Including me. But I don't try very hard. Heheh.
DonaDiabla
11-21-2014, 12:08 AM
Here is a great newbie site to teach you about Rinsing:
http://rinsing.org.uk/
Thank you so much. :D I'll have to check that site out. I'd love to start doing findom in SL, but ahem... as I stated in one of my more recent posts (different thread) I'm not on exactly good terms with Miss Dee. Though I did work at Jinxies for over a year. ;)
Oooh, whats rinsing? lol I feel a google coming on. xD Can't wait to do more research when i get home tomorrow morning. Ugh, why shall this day be so long...
Thank you so much Dona, you rock my socks. :D
lady_footsie
11-21-2014, 12:16 AM
Thank you so much Donna Diabla! I will definitely be looking at those dommes. :) I really should have made more clear that I myself have had problems making findom a viable reliable form of income, but many obviously have succeeded greatly.
DonaDiabla
11-21-2014, 12:20 AM
Actually, Lady Footsie, you call always start your career over as findom :)
Here are some websites:
http://rinsing.org.uk/
http://missfoxx.co.uk
Thank you so much Donna Diabla! I will definitely be looking at those dommes. :) I really should have made more clear that I myself have had problems making findom a viable reliable form of income, but many obviously have succeeded greatly.
lady_footsie
11-21-2014, 12:32 AM
I did really enjoy aspects of it, yes :)
WintersKiss
11-21-2014, 09:22 PM
Here is a great newbie site to teach you about Rinsing:
http://rinsing.org.uk/
Thanks so much, I hadn't heard of that before. UK always so informative. :D
Amata
04-19-2016, 09:50 AM
Hi girls,
I would like to know if somebody has experiences with financial domination and where could be good place to "appear" as findomme.
Does anybody know hepays website? Is it serious or scam?
thank you in advance for help.
Amata
beauvoir
04-19-2016, 10:22 AM
Don't - that's my advice.
It's a fantasy, and one which wastes your time at that.
TrifilinCamHo
04-19-2016, 10:35 AM
I agree w/ beau. In my experience like 98% of self-proclaimed cash pigs are time wasters with no intention of ever following through. I have encountered approximately one real one in almost 3 years of camming. They're out there but they're few and far between and the fin domme market is very saturated.
CatBBW
04-19-2016, 10:51 AM
And the 'real' ones are SOOOOOOO needy. It's actually easier to go suck cock for £££/$$$ than have a needy whiner contacting you all the time cos they paid you a paltry few pence.
SylvySinclair
04-19-2016, 10:52 AM
I agree w/ beau. In my experience like 98% of self-proclaimed cash pigs are time wasters with no intention of ever following through. I have encountered approximately one real one in almost 3 years of camming. They're out there but they're few and far between and the fin domme market is very saturated.I am a domme and i do hve few good money slaves, but yes, they are just few. Most of the sites wont take dommes into financial slavery, they find it gross, so i advise you to not post in real domme sites like fetlife.
audritwo
04-19-2016, 11:35 AM
Don't focus 100% on findomination. Fimsubs aren't reliable. Eventually they will spend all their money, max out all their credit cards. Then either they a disappear, freeload, or start committing fraud (like chargebacks).