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benic
05-02-2011, 04:20 PM
Wow read this whole thread. This was intense. I just got through part 1 will be listening to part 2. I agree she fits the typical drug addicted , drop out, no dad, mom addicted mom a hooker stereotype. I was even shocked to hear that she's been sleeping with two of her mother's ex boyfriends. I think that bothered me the most. I also wonder how the grandmother feels that her daughter actually got her own child addicted to drugs and taught her how to be a whore. I will say that I was glad that she did get her GED and has even written a book about her experiences. I found that was why the interviewer may have contacted her to tell more about her story.

Even though she seemed all smiles for the first half of the interview, I have to wonder if she had some horror stories of meeting people that weren't so nice and normal. Her addiction may have made her able to ignore these moments or perhaps she may add some to Part 2.

I have to say I'm glad this interview was done and look forward to more in the future.

Interestingly, it was Ashly who reached out to us and asked if we would be interested in interviewing her. It was until I started researching her that I realized how crazy her life was... Again it wasn't to sensationalize her life or serve as an example or warning to others. Really it was just so she could tell her story...how people interpret is up to each of the viewers.

Reading her book there's stuff I wish I knew ahead of time before our interview. Stuff like how she was almost on the Jerry Springer show. It was going to be her, her mom, and her mom's boyfriend at the time. It was all scheduled for taping, but at the last moment Ashly decided to pull out.

I still think it's amazing after her whole experience she's able to smile... I don't think I could do that...

Thanks also for the kind words about our interview. I'm glad you liked it. The main reason we wanted to do these interviews were for people in the industry who would have an interest watching it. If you guys aren't watching...then we aren't doing a good job.

arielbriel
05-02-2011, 05:43 PM
Interesting.

leyla2
05-02-2011, 06:21 PM
it's unfortunate that we still have cases like Ashly
I'm an escort who just finished her school term and is now vacationing in Mexico for a week, all with escorting money. So yes there's all kinds of us, although the media seems to always focus on the 'victims'.
I don't like judging girls like Ashly though. Who are we to judge anyway.. If I see a girl like her I'll try my best to help

ashlylorenzana
05-03-2011, 02:51 AM
Wow. I don't know what to say to these chicks, other than wake up! You think that putting on a suit and sugarcoating the truth makes you appear classy? Well, it does. The keyword there being APPEAR. Does it, in fact, make you classy? No way! Sorry, but you will just come across as another fake bitch who is probably keeping all sorts of things hush-hush if you try to play the part of a lawyer when what you do is sex work. While this doesn't mean that you can't be professional, it does mean that your style should reflect your area of expertise. Sorry that some of you were uncomfortable with my reality, but quite honestly it doesn't matter at all whether an escort charges $20 or $5,000 to see a client, since this has nothing to do with their worth as a human being. Some here seem to disagree with that sentiment, which is unfortunate. It's actually sad that we still have cases like some of you, I will continue to count myself as refreshing and rare. When you have the courage to stand up without blurring your face or living in fear of persecution because of what you do, then we can talk. Until then, I think it's safe to say that your fear outweighs your conviction for the way in which you live your life. You may claim to not be ashamed, but if that were true you would not be so private when others go unpunished while exposing themselves to the public on a far greater level than any of you.

Would like to thank you again, Benic. You seem to be one of the only people on here that has a truly open mind and isn't chomping at the bit to judge others. Appreciate your empathy and profound understanding.

Also, at no point in the interview did I refer to my mother as "a dirty ho" or whatever it said. No one was asking for you to be a fan of my drug use, nor condone it, so not sure why that is automatically categorized as a derogatory statement.

ashlylorenzana
05-03-2011, 02:59 AM
Oh yes. And since a lot of you seem to put weight into TheEroticReveiw (which is really quite stupid, to be honest) please feel free to check out my reviews there at the following link:

TouringGirlfriend
05-03-2011, 08:31 AM
Ashly you were seeing men for $100 an hour. What kind of men did you think you were going to attract exactly? NO disrespect really? No one was judging you. I was shocked when I read the story that someone actually charged that low and expected it to be glitz and glamour. You want to come in here and insult people (Calling us fakes and liars) like we are the reason you found yourself in those circumstances. Welcome to sw.

Ashamed? We cover our faces for privacy reasons not because we are ashamed of what we do. It is just common sense. I once showed my face (and got more business because of it) and stopped showing my face because of a stalker client. I have never been ashamed of being a sex worker. I have met some of the ladies here on this site. They know my REAL identity. I have always embraced being an escort/hooker/whatever you want to call me. If anyone is rare here it's me. I entered this business at a 19 and did not fall into drugs, alchohol, did not fall into the hands of a pimp all while making a good living and keeping sane. Your story is what we usually see in the movies/read in books. I don't remember disrespecting your mom and if I did I am truly sorry. However, a wise woman once told me that charity begins at home.

You said...


When you have the courage to stand up without blurring your face or living in fear of persecution because of what you do, then we can talk. Until then, I think it's safe to say that your fear outweighs your conviction for the way in which you live your life. You may claim to not be ashamed, but if that were true you would not be so private when others go unpunished while exposing themselves to the public on a far greater level than any of you.


Like I said before I have showed my face in the past and met people revealing my true identity to them. Ladies with sense don't show their face for several reasons and I'll explain them to you. 1.) They don't want their families to know about their work as a hooker. To explain in detail: Not everyone's mom is ok with hooking. Your mom might be ok with it but I know mine is not. I come from a very proud family who will not understand this work. 2.) Cops/Le: It is no secret that cops print out ads/pictures of escorts and hand it over to hotels so they can alert them when the girl arrives. Showing you face can end you in jail or worse.. you didn't know that? 3.) Stalker clients and their ability to track you. That is that. However, If YOU ever find yourself in North Carolina and would like to meet me in person let me know. We can have on dinner on Lake Norman :beer:.

Anyways....

The ladies that charge $250-$500 don't share the same experience as you. I know I didn't. I'm sorry if you think you think we are sugarcoating it but we're not. You have your experiences and we have ours. The day I have a horrible experience in this industry I will post it on sw. I post everything here :rotfl:. I have also helped ladies get into the industry and some that charged higher than you did and were able to retire within a year with their earnings. You catered to a totally different market. One that I really don't understand. That is why you don't understand that $500 and up market. You have never really been there. Take care.

Again, Welcome to sw.

ashlylorenzana
05-03-2011, 08:52 AM
I have charged $200-$300 per hour (depending on the services involved) for the last four years. $100 was short-lived in the beginning of my career, thank you. I could easily charge more, but I choose not to. I am not looking to entertain snobby billionaires, I'll leave those to you. My clients are well-respected lawyers, doctors and other professionals. I have formed some very close friendships with them over the years and have the utmost respect for them, both as clients and as people.

I don't recall ever complaining about the type of clients I attracted, so I'm not sure why you are acting as if I did. Nor do I recall claiming that my expectations of escorting were "glitz and glamor" or anything of the sort. Where exactly are you getting all this? It certainly wasn't from my interview, so maybe you should specify where these statements are coming from, just to clarify.

I do not have a pimp either, for the record. Also, I was a drug addict BEFORE I began escorting. Anyhow. Not sure if you could possibly make any more ridiculous assumptions in a single posting, but I'm guessing you probably could.

TouringGirlfriend
05-03-2011, 08:57 AM
I have charged $200-$300 per hour (depending on the services involved) for the last four years. $100 was short-lived in the beginning of my career, thank you. I could easily charge more, but I choose not to. I am not looking to entertain snobby billionaires, I'll leave those to you. My clients are well-respected lawyers, doctors and other professionals. I have formed some very close friendships with them over the years and have the utmost respect for them, both as clients and as people.

I don't recall ever complaining about the type of clients I attracted, so I'm not sure why you are acting as if I did. Nor do I recall claiming that my expectations of escorting were "glitz and glamor" or anything of the sort. Where exactly are you getting all this? It certainly wasn't from my interview, so maybe you should specify where these statements are coming from, just to clarify.

I do not have a pimp either, for the record. Also, I was a drug addict BEFORE I began escorting. Anyhow. Not sure if you could possibly make any more ridiculous assumptions in a single posting, but I'm guessing you probably could.

At the end of the day, Our Job description is still the same. The only difference between a girl that charges $100 and the girl that charges $300 an hour is the packaging and sometimes they are even the same depending on the way the girl chooses to represent/market herself. You said you did not wish to cater to snobby billionaires... you know from my experience those men are really sweet and buy me lots of gifts and they usually have better things to do than to sit and post on an escort review board (You have many reviews on TER. Most of my clients prefered not to post reviews). At the end of the day it is about the dollar. I don't care about anything else. Do you agree? I did not mean to disrespect you but I do want you to understand that most of us did not experience what you went though. Calling us liars/Fakes does not help your case. I didn't believe the 1000 an hour hype until I became good friends with a HDH. You see.. we knock what we don't understand.

You will have to reread my post again. I never said you made any claims about the kind of men you attracted, or being pimped. I remember talking about me not you in that posting saying that I have never been pimped, been a drug user.. etc. Sorry about the "glitz and glamour" comment. You are correct.

I really do wish you the best. I hope you do take me up on my offer. I would love to meet you.

roast
05-03-2011, 10:16 AM
I am not confident everyone who is criticizing this interview actually sat through it. It is well over an hour. A lot of it has to do with the ins and outs of basic escorting stuff (how-tos, advertising, customer retention, her books) and then personal stuff (her relationship with her mom, her sister, her future, confidence, etc). No offense to the women in who use or have to work off the streets, but Ive seen 100x worse on Hookers and Johns

She seems like a quirky unpretentious intelligent person who haphazardly came into the sex industry and is making the best of it as an impulsive and creative person. That's the story of a lot girls, except she's transforming this experience by turning it into a story

Sometimes on this board escorting is talked about like people are swinging tens of thousands daily, effortlessly, have always been, purely on being beautiful magical waternymphs ... and if you aren't then there is something wrong with your business practice and your rates. Having done IRL sex work for years before camming I know that's not true and that kind of hype is misleading to those who are naive or just starting out in this industry.

I thought it was honest. Id rather hear real than bullshit like Alexa DiCarlo. She said she barely even advertises now, which is the goal of many. Sex workers will always be depicted by others completely wrong - so I appreciate when actual sex workers are doing the talking to show the full spectrum of what we can be like. I know I can't be out so Ill take whatever is out there

One escort blog that is consistent and no bullshit is Jenny De Milo, highly recommended: http://jennydemilo.com/

TouringGirlfriend
05-03-2011, 11:00 AM
I think most fail to realize that all our experiences differ in the adult industry as a whole. People that do this are only kidding themselves. For example: As a camgirl, I am not a top earner. I do not make 500-$1000 a day though there are girls that do make that and even $50k a month. I'm sure their lifestyles are more glamourous than the girl that makes less.. right? As a stripper, I was never a top earner though some would say I was. I was not making $1000 a day but there were girls in my old club that did.

No, I was/ am not one of the escorts that hate their job. I tried to see the good in my job than most girls. A lot of escorts hate the fact that they have to fuck men for money. I did not. The men did not disgust me/bother me/whatever.

I have always said if you don't like something then why do it? When you do something just because of the money it affects you mentally and you become JADED. Dancing was something I could have done for quick cash for a looong time but there was something about everyone staring at me half naked that didn't rub me wll. It wasn't something I saw myself doing for a long time so I stopped.

When you have someone saying that they make so much more or charge so much more they are calling "fake" and "pretentious". I bet if those $50k a month camgirls and $1000 a day strippers stated how much they made most of the girls that make less will roll their eyes because they have never been there. They cannot relate.

Ashly told the truth about HER experience as an escort. However, I do not relate to her. When one escort shares her bad experience she's being "real" ::). I am sure there are thousands of girls that do relate to Ashly but I am not one of them. I am actually glad that benic showed that side of escorting. Escorting is not a glamous job and it is what you make out of it. For me, I try to make the job as glamourous as I can from posting ads to knocking on the door of the client's hotel room. I'm not one of the girls that get into this and think gloom and doom and feel like shit because of what I do. If you feel like shit doing anything then don't do it. I am proud to be a hooker/sexworker/escort/temporary girlfriend/whatever. That is just me. Some may say it's snooby or bitchy or "pretentious" oh well. Those that have met me know that it's the truth. The escorts that I surround myself with are happy doing what they do. There really is such thing as loving what you do.

Want to read commentary from a REAL/non bitter/ blunt/ geniuine escort that LOVES what she does?

ashlylorenzana
05-03-2011, 01:59 PM
I have always said if you don't like something then why do it? When you do something just because of the money it affects you mentally and you become JADED. Dancing was something I could have done for quick cash for a looong time but there was something about everyone staring at me half naked that didn't rub me wll. It wasn't something I saw myself doing for a long time so I stopped.

When you have someone saying that they make so much more or charge so much more they are calling "fake" and "pretentious". I bet if those $50k a month camgirls and $1000 a day strippers stated how much they made most of the girls that make less will roll their eyes because they have never been there. They cannot relate.

Amen to the statement: "if you don't like something then why do it?" Couldn't agree more with that. The road to becoming jaded is not so pretty, you're right. I can also relate to your feelings about being stared at half naked, not my cup of tea either!


Ashly told the truth about HER experience as an escort. However, I do not relate to her. When one escort shares her bad experience she's being "real" ::). I am sure there are thousands of girls that do relate to Ashly but I am not one of them. I am actually glad that benic showed that side of escorting. Escorting is not a glamous job and it is what you make out of it. For me, I try to make the job as glamourous as I can from posting ads to knocking on the door of the client's hotel room. I'm not one of the girls that get into this and think gloom and doom and feel like shit because of what I do. If you feel like shit doing anything then don't do it. I am proud to be a hooker/sexworker/escort/temporary girlfriend/whatever. That is just me. Some may say it's snooby or bitchy or "pretentious" oh well. Those that have met me know that it's the truth. The escorts that I surround myself with are happy doing what they do. There really is such thing as loving what you do.



Yes, that's exactly what I did. Just shared my own experience with the things I have done. I didn't do so with the expectation of anyone being able to relate to my experiences. In fact, I pretty much count on the fact that no one ever will. I'm pretty lonely in that way, I've always had lots of difficulty finding others who can relate to me on any level. So it's okay that you don't, maybe that's a good thing! But I wish everyone wouldn't think of my situation as "bad" or "negative" because I don't think that it is. At least not totally. I am fairly content with myself, believe it or not...

Roast, just wanted to thank you for the things you said. I kind of felt like everyone was ganging up against me on here before I had a chance to speak for myself. I appreciate the points you made, I won't feel so bad for the rest of the day because of your comments. Thanks.

Thank you also for the welcome, TouringGirlfriend. Forgot to say that.

benic
05-03-2011, 03:02 PM
Yes, that's exactly what I did. Just shared my own experience with the things I have done. I didn't do so with the expectation of anyone being able to relate to my experiences. In fact, I pretty much count on the fact that no one ever will. I'm pretty lonely in that way, I've always had lots of difficulty finding others who can relate to me on any level. So it's okay that you don't, maybe that's a good thing! But I wish everyone wouldn't think of my situation as "bad" or "negative" because I don't think that it is. At least not totally. I am fairly content with myself, believe it or not...

Roast, just wanted to thank you for the things you said. I kind of felt like everyone was ganging up against me on here before I had a chance to speak for myself. I appreciate the points you made, I won't feel so bad for the rest of the day because of your comments. Thanks.

Thank you also for the welcome, TouringGirlfriend. Forgot to say that.

Very well said. There have been some people that might have been "ganging up" on you, but luckily there are some pretty rational and articulate users on here. Who try to present another perspective for the other users (especially TouringGirlfriend and Roast as examples). I've been pretty impressed with this board as a whole.

It's a like a lot of things in life where it's easy to make a snap judgement about something before you really understand the situation (more so in the adult industry). For me that's why I'm glad you wrote your book...it helps me get a better understanding of your world...a world that's so different than mine, but the feelings of happiness, sadness, excitement...I can empathize with

I think the quote goes..."seek first to understand then to be understood"

leyla2
05-04-2011, 08:43 PM
"ganging up" on her? What a childish comment. This is not high school!

It's just that your interview portrayed her as a "victim", which is pretty much always the case with inteviews regarding sex workers.

Yes it's not ALL glamour, but it CAN be quite glamorous and fun actually.

Personally I don't judge girls like Ashly. If I started at 17 I'd probably be dead by now so she must be a strong character.

No one was ganging up on her. It's just that WE did not have the same experience that she had.

benic
05-04-2011, 09:28 PM
"ganging up" on her? What a childish comment. This is not high school!

It's just that your interview portrayed her as a "victim", which is pretty much always the case with inteviews regarding sex workers.

Yes it's not ALL glamour, but it CAN be quite glamorous and fun actually.

Personally I don't judge girls like Ashly. If I started at 17 I'd probably be dead by now so she must be a strong character.

No one was ganging up on her. It's just that WE did not have the same experience that she had.

How do you see I portrayed he as victim? I'm not saying that to defend myself, just want to know what I said to give you that impression. It wasn't my intent to make out to be a victim, but if you see that way, apparently I failed.

SwanSongs
05-05-2011, 03:05 AM
I appreciated the candor and sincerity in Ashly's story. Obviously, other women have different experiences (some better, some worse), but as was stated in some of the comments, this was just ONE person's story, and I feel that it has an important message. I understand that ELM is just starting out, and I am sure that they will be providing us with many insightful interviews, from a healthy range of subjects, who can offer different perspectives to further illuminate all aspects (including the good) of the Adult industry. It's something that I personally am very interested in, as I'm a Psych graduate AND sex worker (cam model). Ashly seems like someone I would like to get to know better; she seems like the type of person I'd be friends with.

ashlylorenzana
05-05-2011, 04:55 AM
SwanSongs, thank you for what you said. It means a lot to me. I've had the hardest time finding other women who will even consider being friends with me or getting to know me. It would be nice to have at least one genuine female friend, seriously. Thanks for having an open mind, really helped me smile today.

Benic, I don't think you portrayed me as a victim at all, for whatever that is worth. I thought you were very professional and stuck to the focus of the interview, which was mainly to talk about my experience as an escort. I think you did an excellent job and believe that the true message of the interview was delivered quite well. Please don't think of it as a failure, because it wasn't.

benic
05-06-2011, 02:16 AM
SwanSongs, thank you for what you said. It means a lot to me. I've had the hardest time finding other women who will even consider being friends with me or getting to know me. It would be nice to have at least one genuine female friend, seriously. Thanks for having an open mind, really helped me smile today.

Benic, I don't think you portrayed me as a victim at all, for whatever that is worth. I thought you were very professional and stuck to the focus of the interview, which was mainly to talk about my experience as an escort. I think you did an excellent job and believe that the true message of the interview was delivered quite well. Please don't think of it as a failure, because it wasn't.

It's surprising to me how women won't be friends with you. I mean if you didn't tell me your occupation I wouldn't think you were any different than most other girls. It's sad how once labels are added to someone how immediately people's impression of you changes...when you in fact haven't changed.

Thanks for the kind words about the interview. I think this kind of learning is great for me personally. You were the first escort I've ever chatted with. I love how open about it you are.

TouringGirlfriend
05-06-2011, 02:28 AM
It's surprising to me how women won't be friends with you. I mean if you didn't tell me your occupation I wouldn't think you were any different than most other girls. It's sad how once labels are added to someone how immediately people's impression of you changes...when you in fact haven't changed.


I don't go around telling people that I'm an escort. It's just not wise. To the average person, Ashly is just another girl UNLESS she went around telling people she was an escort WHICH believe it or NOT a lot of people do. I don't know why they do that, I don't understand it but that's not something you go around telling everyone.

Ashly, Why won't the girls be your friend? I find that I spend too much time online/working to actually go out and make friends so I become friends with people IN the business and it make it all so easier.