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IsobelWren
07-17-2011, 10:18 PM
Cool. I'm just peopling this thread with stupid shit I've done.
So I have my laptops on tv dinner tables because my room is really small so when I'm done camming I can pack the laptops away, fold up the tables, stow them and have a floor. I just started doing this thing that (in my mind) simulates climbing up on someone's lap to start the lapdance, except instead of pushing myself up by holding the arms of the chair I put my hands in the middle of the sides of the tv table.
Now, this has worked so far because I'm pretty aware of where the middle is.
Tonight I wasn't paying as much attention and put my weight just a LIIIITLE too far to the back of the table and flipped it away from me. I caught it before it went crashing to the ground but it knocked the cam off the laptop and disconnected it. The laptop slid halfway off and I did a belly flop into the table, tangled my feet in my sheets and cracked my knee on the floor but good.
Poor guy never came back. I'm sure the last thing he saw was me from an unflattering angle with an, "Oh SHIT!" look on my face as he toppled backwards. He may think I'm dead. I wonder if...yeah, I bet you he kept jerking it.
KoyKili
07-17-2011, 11:58 PM
Cool. I'm just peopling this thread with stupid shit I've done.
So I have my laptops on tv dinner tables because my room is really small so when I'm done camming I can pack the laptops away, fold up the tables, stow them and have a floor. I just started doing this thing that (in my mind) simulates climbing up on someone's lap to start the lapdance, except instead of pushing myself up by holding the arms of the chair I put my hands in the middle of the sides of the tv table.
Now, this has worked so far because I'm pretty aware of where the middle is.
Tonight I wasn't paying as much attention and put my weight just a LIIIITLE too far to the back of the table and flipped it away from me. I caught it before it went crashing to the ground but it knocked the cam off the laptop and disconnected it. The laptop slid halfway off and I did a belly flop into the table, tangled my feet in my sheets and cracked my knee on the floor but good.
Poor guy never came back. I'm sure the last thing he saw was me from an unflattering angle with an, "Oh SHIT!" look on my face as he toppled backwards. He may think I'm dead. I wonder if...yeah, I bet you he kept jerking it.
Isobel...you just make my day! I bet you were just adorable as you toppled off the bed! :)
~Carmen~
07-18-2011, 08:04 AM
Holy crap Isobel:O I'm glad you're okay after that!
stacellia
07-18-2011, 10:06 PM
OMG I so needed this. And I can relate to all of it that's what makes it so freakin funny to read. My husband is just laughing at me saying "it wasn't that funny" Well my answer is: it's not unless your the one actually doing the camming. I laughed so hard I have tears rolling down my face and my make up is everywhere - i guess i grabbed the non waterproof mascara.
IsobelWren
07-19-2011, 05:25 PM
Holy crap Isobel:O I'm glad you're okay after that!
Yeah, I have a pretty ugly bruise on my knee but I'm taking arnica for it so it should heal soon. Thanks for the wellwishes :)
ShadySailor
07-25-2011, 04:37 PM
FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!! Ultimate cam fail! I was recording a video to sell, filmed for about 30 minutes, got super into it and it was really sexy...
After I was finished, I turned off the cam and set up on my bed to watch my new vid in all it's glory...and I get a 30 second video of me messing with my computer and putting on my clothes! I didn't record ANYTHING! I am SO pissed!
IsobelWren
07-26-2011, 07:30 AM
FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!! Ultimate cam fail! I was recording a video to sell, filmed for about 30 minutes, got super into it and it was really sexy...
After I was finished, I turned off the cam and set up on my bed to watch my new vid in all it's glory...and I get a 30 second video of me messing with my computer and putting on my clothes! I didn't record ANYTHING! I am SO pissed!
OH NO! I HATE it when that happens!
prettygreeneyes
07-26-2011, 12:44 PM
FUUUUUUUUUUCK!!! Ultimate cam fail! I was recording a video to sell, filmed for about 30 minutes, got super into it and it was really sexy...
After I was finished, I turned off the cam and set up on my bed to watch my new vid in all it's glory...and I get a 30 second video of me messing with my computer and putting on my clothes! I didn't record ANYTHING! I am SO pissed!
Ahhh I did this last week and it was an oil video so then I had to wipe all the oil off and do it again >:(
ShadySailor
07-27-2011, 10:57 PM
Ahhh I did this last week and it was an oil video so then I had to wipe all the oil off and do it again >:(
I just did a shower recording and the camera fogged up halfway through, so I had to rerecord! Balls!!!
NikitaDevine
07-28-2011, 05:31 AM
Well none of these sound as bad as this...
In an effort to move out of the anal newbie category (just hate not getting that money) I invested in a beginner butt plug. All in all pretty comfortable...only problem is its visible from the back unless of course you're going full coverage. I had decided one day to leave it in until someone wanted anal which I would discreetly take it out. Well of course I was wearing a thong and doing a sexy lil dance number. In come 13 guys straight away...we're talking, I'm dancing and here comes the "lemme see ur sexy ass bb" I turn around give a little shake...next thing I know people are clearing out and I realize oh shit the butt plug (FUCK NOT BEING ABLE TO SEE CHAT AND ENCODER AT THE SAME TIME). I slam the laptop shut so quick you have no idea!!! Completely mortified and then of course go on few mins later and I hear crickets.... Top that lol
MzStar
07-28-2011, 05:43 AM
Well none of these sound as bad as this...
In an effort to move out of the anal newbie category (just hate not getting that money) I invested in a beginner butt plug. All in all pretty comfortable...only problem is its visible from the back unless of course you're going full coverage. I had decided one day to leave it in until someone wanted anal which I would discreetly take it out. Well of course I was wearing a thong and doing a sexy lil dance number. In come 13 guys straight away...we're talking, I'm dancing and here comes the "lemme see ur sexy ass bb" I turn around give a little shake...next thing I know people are clearing out and I realize oh shit the butt plug (FUCK NOT BEING ABLE TO SEE CHAT AND ENCODER AT THE SAME TIME). I slam the laptop shut so quick you have no idea!!! Completely mortified and then of course go on few mins later and I hear crickets.... Top that lol
OMG!!!!!
MzStar
07-28-2011, 05:45 AM
I just did a shower recording and the camera fogged up halfway through, so I had to rerecord! Balls!!!
Use cold or semi cold water for showershows......never make it hot.....just room temp
Lusty Laken
07-28-2011, 07:56 AM
I forgot about my Monster drink sitting at the bottom of the bed. During a private I kicked it over without realizing it. Orange liquid ran down and suddenly appeared all around me on cam, as if I urinated on myself. He didn't say anything, but I'm sure he noticed lol.
naturalbeautyDDD
11-16-2011, 09:50 PM
OH MY GOD...the most embarrassing thing happened today on cam! It's kinda gross, I had just gone pee right before logging on, once I'm in private legs spread rubbing on my kitty I noticed I had toilet paper stuck to that area between my pussy and my ass! Holy effing shit! It was embarrassing but the guy didn't say anything even though I know he had to see it with my stuff all up in the cam..hahaha...I'm laughing while typing this...so hilarious!
CinnimonKiss
11-17-2011, 10:39 PM
lmao dont lie u know what i mean!! If uve have had the joy of this happening to u during a private/exclusive, oh god ! LMFAO i had this happen to me tonight and i couldnt believe it. jesus christ !!!! buut hey i dont think he noticed i had music playing and i was talking...plus he didnt saay anything, n i checked to see if he rated me a low star, but he didnt! ::)
Im sry i just had to post this...hhahahaha FML
tinydancer23
11-17-2011, 10:57 PM
srsly, don't worry about it! lol, most of them don't care. i actually farted in a gold show the other day because i came so hard while i was doing double penetration and none of the guys said anything, they all said it was the best gold show i'd ever done. i freaked out for a sec and almost stopped but i just played it off and none of them seemed to notice. i've queefed in shows before too. if they want me to fuck myself that hard it's just something they're gonna have to deal with, lol. but i promise they barely notice for all we freak out and get embarrassed about it, lol.
AlleysonChains
11-17-2011, 11:00 PM
This has happened to me before. More than enough times, lol. I just blame it on the cat in the other room, haha!
Tsani
11-17-2011, 11:38 PM
I can make myself queef and someone requested it once, along with a closeup of my pussy ROFL! It's hard to do while holding the cam up there cuz I have to lay back and get my stomach muscles just right to suck the air in. Ooh that reminds me, I need to make a queefing video for C4S....
MeganElise
11-17-2011, 11:40 PM
This happens to me especially in doggystyle. But the guys never say anything.
taylor_sweet
11-17-2011, 11:46 PM
this happends to me too lol so funny the guys dont say anything but i secretly laugh inside like ooommmgg did i really i just did and just keep going like nothing happend
funismymiddlename
11-18-2011, 02:00 AM
Haha it's called a queef. I learned that from south park. It has happened to me a few times. I didn't have any music playing but either they didn't notice or care. Any man with sexual experience has prob had a queef in real life so don't worry.
ClaudiaReina
11-18-2011, 05:08 AM
Lol! It happens...An escort friend of mine had a client who was so horrified by this that he left the appointment. He insisted that it was a fart and there is no such thing as pussy fart:D And how dare she fart on an appointment...Anyway, I find that when I do my Kegel type exercises, it happens a lot less.
Spinnerette
11-18-2011, 09:30 AM
Happens to me in doggy mainly. I just laugh it off. ^___^ Mature, experienced males don't care one way or another.
naughtycamgirl
11-18-2011, 12:43 PM
Same here, it happens mostly in doggy style ..I just carry on and no one told me anything about it
Khamille
11-18-2011, 12:49 PM
I've totally done this in shows, I get embarrassed even though I know that they'd only be offended if they'd never been with a woman IMO
CourtneyRaine
11-18-2011, 01:04 PM
Lmao yep, happens almost all the time when I reposition from doggy style. Luckily that's usually the only time I queef so I've learned to moan super load while I switch positions to mask the sound ;D
AngelNWings88
12-10-2011, 02:47 PM
I have done that on many occasions. I just laugh and yea doggy seems to cause it more.
ManyRoses
12-10-2011, 04:21 PM
Lol! It happens...An escort friend of mine had a client who was so horrified by this that he left the appointment. He insisted that it was a fart and there is no such thing as pussy fart:D And how dare she fart on an appointment...Anyway, I find that when I do my Kegel type exercises, it happens a lot less.
OMG that's so ridiculous!! What a moron - hope she got paid first!!!
I've actually flat out farted on cam once - but no one said a word, so I guess they didn't notice...LOL
ManyRoses
12-10-2011, 04:22 PM
^^^ Oops - re-read that and had to clarify - the CUSTOMER was a moron...not your friend!
lolabunny
12-11-2011, 04:15 AM
Lol...i queef all the time in a prv lmao!!!....smh, they usually don't notice it lol
luscious sadie
12-11-2011, 04:52 AM
I farted during a private the other day. Close up of my pussy so the cam was SO CLOSE. I was pushing the toy out of my pussy since it was so lubed up and he asked to see it again. and again. Anyway, I was pushing so hard that I straight up farted and it was sooo loud. I was really embarassed but didn't stop. I just started talking dirty about queefing and how it was so hot that he filled my pussy with air when he was fucking me.
5 stars :P
IsobelWren
01-04-2012, 07:01 PM
I now cam on a little sofa in our second bedroom. I cover it with a fitted sheet so as not to ruin the sofa with girl jizz and coconut oil.
In a gold show one I was doing a "sexy" strip tease dance. I'd moved from the floor to the couch, was up on my knees on the couch, facing away, shaking my rump. I thought it'd be cute to put the other knee up on the back of the sofa and spread it, give them a good look.
I put my knee up, but when I shifted my weight to lean forward it popped the sheet off. My knee slipped back down the couch and I faceplanted into the wall. It made this amazing hollow WHOMP noise and RP called up the stairs, "You ok?!"
The guys thought it was hilarious. One of them even tipped me, "for the blooper"
Now, however, there is a makeup/skin oil print on our wall that nothing will get off. You can see a perfect color rendition of my forehead and powdered-in eyebrows, the tip of my nose and a smeary, wince-looking pink lipstick mouth.
After trying to get it off and only making it worse I've just hung a whiteboard over it. I'll figure it out when I move!
~Carmen~
01-04-2012, 07:50 PM
Wow Isobel! I'm glad you're okay after all that. I wore high heels in a gold show today. There were about 40 seconds left when I kicked the tripod over and my cam flew across the room. I apoligized and put it back quickly. Nobody said anything.lol
lydiastardust
01-04-2012, 09:37 PM
Not exactly camgirl fail, but close enough...
My bf and I decided it would be fun to record us fucking. At some point I want to sell such videos, but we decided the first few ones will be *just for us*. So we're on my futon, about to get it on, and the futon for some reason completely falls over, I land on the floor behind it, my hair piece fell off, and I was laughing a storm. We decided to just set it back up and keep going, and I was soo excited the next day (we passed out afterward, lol) to see the fail (well, that and the sex!). Fail on fail...nothing recorded! Just a minute of me fucking around with the cam with my bf sitting on the futon lol. I think I'm going to have to try again tonight...
Gabrielle_
01-04-2012, 10:00 PM
Actually just lately except with my very favourite regulars, EVERY moment on cam seems like a fail to me. I dunno whether i gave myself too much time off/ got lazy, but it's like I've forgotten how to be sexy!! The whole thing just feels awkward atm.
On the plus side, this thread has me in stitches!! Thanks for the laughs :rotfl:
LMFAO!! I feel the same!!
Timor
01-04-2012, 10:36 PM
I now cam on a little sofa in our second bedroom. I cover it with a fitted sheet so as not to ruin the sofa with girl jizz and coconut oil.
In a gold show one I was doing a "sexy" strip tease dance. I'd moved from the floor to the couch, was up on my knees on the couch, facing away, shaking my rump. I thought it'd be cute to put the other knee up on the back of the sofa and spread it, give them a good look.
I put my knee up, but when I shifted my weight to lean forward it popped the sheet off. My knee slipped back down the couch and I faceplanted into the wall. It made this amazing hollow WHOMP noise and RP called up the stairs, "You ok?!"
The guys thought it was hilarious. One of them even tipped me, "for the blooper"
Now, however, there is a makeup/skin oil print on our wall that nothing will get off. You can see a perfect color rendition of my forehead and powdered-in eyebrows, the tip of my nose and a smeary, wince-looking pink lipstick mouth.
After trying to get it off and only making it worse I've just hung a whiteboard over it. I'll figure it out when I move!
:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:
can't.......breathe.......
LeaLovesyou
01-05-2012, 01:52 AM
A few weeks ago I was Finished Camming after making 400 I was all excited and pumped up. I ran to the living room and told my boyfriend I was finished and what a good night/morning I had. Well he goes into my room and starts grabbing all my dildos off my bed (I was running the sink to get ready to clean them) Hes half asleep grabbing dildos while talking to me from the other room hes joking being stupid and all of a sudden he comes into the kitchen and was like somethings making noise I think your cams on! I went in there horrified to see 12 guys in my room!! I was sooo embarrassed we were talking and I was telling him about all my crazy pvts that day and they saw/heard everything. So much for me having No Boyfriend....
maryjaynexo
01-05-2012, 02:30 AM
Ohmagawd, I have some hilarious ones.
Last year, during one of my first days camming, I was super nervous; and I also had my cam stacked up on some books (no tripod). Someone in free chat asked me if I liked anal and I piped up in the squeakiest fake-happy voice: "OMG! YES! I DO!" and at that exact moment, my cam fell over with a big BOOM. After I picked it back up, someone in chat said "I guess she really likes it." LMAO.
My cats have also contributed to some funny moments. For instance, a couple of weeks ago, my kitten/new kitty had taken to sleeping in the bed with me, and I didn't notice she was behind me on cam... until someone was like HEY I SEE THAT KITTY PASSED OUT BEHIND YOU. I laughed so hard.
Also, once, my cat was in heat (before she was spayed) and all the custies thought it was a baby crying! I had to keep her in with me since the boy works an at-home call centre job; and she was making that noise for a few hours. I guess everyone thought I would let a baby cry for that long ::) Gotta love neglecting your pretend baby.
I just recorded a sissification fetish clip for C4S tonight with the boy, and just as I start saying some line about how he's such a beautiful lady, the cam comes crashing down and everything on the bookshelf fell on him and buried him. I got it on film, and I must've replayed it about 10 times while laughing my ass off so hard I was crying ;D
Mayrah
01-05-2012, 09:39 AM
I now cam on a little sofa in our second bedroom. I cover it with a fitted sheet so as not to ruin the sofa with girl jizz and coconut oil.
In a gold show one I was doing a "sexy" strip tease dance. I'd moved from the floor to the couch, was up on my knees on the couch, facing away, shaking my rump. I thought it'd be cute to put the other knee up on the back of the sofa and spread it, give them a good look.
I put my knee up, but when I shifted my weight to lean forward it popped the sheet off. My knee slipped back down the couch and I faceplanted into the wall. It made this amazing hollow WHOMP noise and RP called up the stairs, "You ok?!"
The guys thought it was hilarious. One of them even tipped me, "for the blooper"
Now, however, there is a makeup/skin oil print on our wall that nothing will get off. You can see a perfect color rendition of my forehead and powdered-in eyebrows, the tip of my nose and a smeary, wince-looking pink lipstick mouth.
After trying to get it off and only making it worse I've just hung a whiteboard over it. I'll figure it out when I move!
Hahah, that really sucks. I hope your okay! (sends e-hugs from the Netherlands):D
Seductive
01-05-2012, 04:25 PM
I cam in my bedroom and one day I was just about to get off to go to bed when I got a private. My boyfriend was already in bed across the room and just smiled when I accepted the private. So I start going at it and everyone is happy, except, four minutes in, I hear a semi loud fart. I look over at boyfriend with warning eyes and he smiles and mouths "Sorry." So I go on and fifteen minutes later, the customer cums and is satisfied. He thanks me, I put on my clothes, and I blow him a kiss good night. Still in private with audio on, I see the customer bend down to type something. Suddenly, boyfriend lets out the loudest fart I've ever heard. So loud that it actually gently shakes the floor I'm on. I'm staring at him with deer in the headlights look and the customer is looking at me like he's wondering how such a big noise came out of a little person. After that, I quickly made my goodbyes and logged off for the night. I still laugh thinking about it. XD
MissJenny
01-05-2012, 04:43 PM
My story is totally tmi! Just so you know.
About a week ago I was spotting( I'm on contious birthcontrol so it happens on occasion) so an hour before cam I insert a tampon to absorb whatever is here(tmi lol).
Any way cut the strig super short as I normally do. Fastforward to cam time and I have completely forgotten about it and begin my stream. And get taken pvt. A Request for toys is made, and I comply. It feels kind of weird an I can't quite figure it out until about a minute and a half into penetration and I realize what I have done.
The most awkward five minutes of my life followed where I was constantly goin between paranoia that he knew what I had done and fighting hysterics. The session ends, and I quickly log out and spend the next ten minutes fishing and laughing my ass off. But hey I got a five star review :)
amberose
01-05-2012, 08:05 PM
I was doing a bj in private and accidentally said "I want your little dick in my mouth." (he's not an sp guy lol) I told him I switched my words around and laughed...thankfully he thought it was funny so it wasn't too bad, lol.
aleciaxxx
01-06-2012, 08:37 AM
I got twisted around in a funny position and my knee popped during a private. I yelled and got up. after taking a few seconds to compose my self I leaned over to pick up the lube and fell off the couch!!! my customer laughed at me and asked if I was hurt, my answer? just my pride! lol.
AngeXx
01-07-2012, 05:34 AM
I was in a masturbation/rub down show with one of my regulars. He wants me to "cum for him", and even though I've never done it.....he always persists that I try. Anyways....I was all excited going to town, when I thought I was going to have an orgasm. Next thing I know I'm extremely wet, which is when I realize.....I peed!
The worst part about it is that my lady parts were red so it looked like I had just gotten my period on cam! OMFG....thankfully I regained my exposure and told him that I cummed, and it was my first time and how lucky he was. OYE!
LaceyCummings
01-07-2012, 11:15 AM
[quote=BlkSharpie;2137340]
On cam...I had a guy with a smoking fetish...and I accidentally dropped the cigarette...I go flying off the bed not to get burnt, it goes flying off and Im trying to find where it landed and grab it...he watched me the whole time too...hot mess..for real."
That just happened to me yesterday! I was doing a smoking show and using a dildo when I dropped my cigarette and when I reached to grab it, the dildo popped out of me, and it took me a few frantic attempts to pick the cigarette up. It was so awkward, luckily the customer thought it was funny.
I just got over a cold, but I didn't let that stop me from camming, lol. For a few days, I was having to mute my mic and stand up when I'd be having these violent coughing fits. One time in group pvt, I got a tickle in my throat and coughed so hard it made my dildo shoot out. The worst part was that I couldn't stop coughing for like 10 seconds after that, waving my hands, like
"I'm ok!" It didn't put people off as much as I'd have thought.
I have the same problem with queefing when I'm moving out of the doggy position! I've never had a customer say anything though so I'm guessing they don't hear it.
And I totally flub up my words in my dirty talk sometimes. So glad I'm not the only one!
neliana
01-07-2012, 02:18 PM
Lol I had a coughing fit in private recently, I couldn't stop choking and coughing for like 5 minutes, and none of the guys left! I almost wanted them to leave so I could re gain my composure and drink some water. I also let out the loudest fart of all time in exclusive a few days ago...the guy was like "got some air in there,huh?" Awkward, but he stayed for awhile after that.
Oh and I forgot to add all of the dirty talk mess-ups I've had, like "mm your dick is so tight" "my pussy is hard" "jerk that pussy for me" "mmm Im a dirty boy" Lmao!!!
Gabrielle_
01-07-2012, 02:41 PM
Today: dude was going on and on about my MILFyness....how I look like his mom's friend, his parents are home, etc. We are having a great time in pvt, then I ask him how old he is (for purposes of playing up the age difference, etc.) IMMEDIATE door slam! Made me laugh out loud for reals. :)
luscious sadie
01-07-2012, 03:50 PM
I farted in free chat the other day. I said "no one is taking me to private? I FART ON YOU ALL!" I meant to fart silently but you can't always get what you want.
Cam_Model_Jess
01-07-2012, 04:32 PM
When I was really new to camming, I had a reg who was really nice to me and stayed for long shows. He convinced me to do something I wasn't completely comfortable with, but I did it anyway b/c I was still naive and felt "safe" with him.
A few weeks later, someone came in and told me that he watched my video and I immediately panicked b/c I didn't know where the video was but I knew exactly which session he was talking about because of a prop I used.
My husband told me that I had a video on the site (they posted my private session). This was a long time ago. I was so embarrassed with the video that I stopped camming on that account until the site closed it and the video went away, then I opened a new account with the same name. The thing is, I have no idea why, out of all the shows I did, they would want that video on there. It was horrible and I was extremely identifiable because of something I showed that I normally cover.
luscious sadie
01-07-2012, 04:50 PM
When I was really new to camming, I had a reg who was really nice to me and stayed for long shows. He convinced me to do something I wasn't completely comfortable with, but I did it anyway b/c I was still naive and felt "safe" with him.
A few weeks later, someone came in and told me that he watched my video and I immediately panicked b/c I didn't know where the video was but I knew exactly which session he was talking about because of a prop I used.
My husband told me that I had a video on the site (they posted my private session). This was a long time ago. I was so embarrassed with the video that I stopped camming on that account until the site closed it and the video went away, then I opened a new account with the same name. The thing is, I have no idea why, out of all the shows I did, they would want that video on there. It was horrible and I was extremely identifiable because of something I showed that I normally cover.
this happened to me too!!! It's still on my SM profile. I'm going to create a new account for DP but seriously... in the video they chose of me, my tits don't come out and I'm so new and do stuff that I normally don't do anyway. It's so stupid. I wouldn't care and it would be so much better if you were allowed to choose out of like, three clips before they put it up.. at least be okay with the show that they're letting everyone see for no money to you.