Almost Jaded
11-06-2011, 05:30 PM
Kelly - not counting the times I am INTENTIONALLY an asshole looking to offend, I have managed, at different times, both on SW and IRL (not to mention other boards, lol), to horribly offend friends, strangers, family members, significant others, and probably God - by trying to be lighthearted and popping off with my version of humor, or by being the "all business get-r-done" person I can tend to be when something needs handled. It happens.
I once offended Mediocrity to tears and hurt her feelings horribly in chat one day and damn near got myself ostracized from one of my fave circles on this site by making a comment that was intended to be a back-handed compliment. A few months ago I offended another SW who was visiting Vegas with her SO because my demeanor over the phone while trying to set something up came off as harsh when I was merely in a hurry - and then her SO started texting me and I overreacted and it escalated into something really awful and ruined everyone's night for no good reason. I alienated one of my best friends of years by being honest, and we haven't spoken in almost 5 years now as a result (though in all fairness to myself, he handled that whole situation about as insanely badly as possible). It goes on and on.
We all do it, speaking to the unintentional times, and as much as we'd like to take things back or "undo", the onus is also on the other parties to not instantly assume something is meant to offend - something else that I know I am sometimes guilty of as well.
This is especially true on an internet board or via text, etc, where nuance can be hard to detect.
:shrug:
I once offended Mediocrity to tears and hurt her feelings horribly in chat one day and damn near got myself ostracized from one of my fave circles on this site by making a comment that was intended to be a back-handed compliment. A few months ago I offended another SW who was visiting Vegas with her SO because my demeanor over the phone while trying to set something up came off as harsh when I was merely in a hurry - and then her SO started texting me and I overreacted and it escalated into something really awful and ruined everyone's night for no good reason. I alienated one of my best friends of years by being honest, and we haven't spoken in almost 5 years now as a result (though in all fairness to myself, he handled that whole situation about as insanely badly as possible). It goes on and on.
We all do it, speaking to the unintentional times, and as much as we'd like to take things back or "undo", the onus is also on the other parties to not instantly assume something is meant to offend - something else that I know I am sometimes guilty of as well.
This is especially true on an internet board or via text, etc, where nuance can be hard to detect.
:shrug: