View Full Version : Younger Dancers
rickdugan
01-05-2012, 03:09 PM
Ok, first off you are really being an asshole here. And secondly you are incorrect. Where I live the clubs I work in are bikini bars. Which means #1--I WEAR A BIKINI WHICH IS THE EQUIVALENT OF WHAT EVERYONE SEES HERE AT OUR BEACHES WHICH IN FACT MEANS ESSENTIALLY PEOPLE SEE THE SAME BOOB COVERAGE ON THE RUNWAY THAT THEY DO AT THE BEACH FOR FREE-- THEREFORE I AM CAPITALIZING IN THE CLUBS #2-I DO NOT PERFORM LAPDANCES--THESE ARE NOT LAPDANCE CLUBS...Yea so I guess it IS me after all who has the upper hand;). Also not every therapist gets $300/ hour. And additionally, our shifts are 1 hour and 40 mins with only 1 hour of actual dancing/working. If on a good night I am making $500-1000 an hour, in actuality I am far surpassing most therapists.
Shift, you don't have to justify yourself to him or anyone else. It doesn't matter whether you dance in a bikini or fully nude, nor does it matter whether or not you give lapdances. He has an extremely myopic view of the world and he is in the wrong church preaching to the wrong congregation.
rickdugan
01-05-2012, 08:23 PM
As a dancer....it was REALLY irritating to hear "Too young" when I was bright eyed and bushy tailed at 18....mind you, knowing now (at the 'ripe old age' of 22) what those men probably had in mind - I'm very glad they thought I was 'too young'. It preserved that small part of my innocense for just that little bit longer.
I wish some other, much more predatorial men, had done the same.
This hits square on point for me and is exactly why I started this thread. I don't want to be a guy who contributes to stripping a barely legal young dancer of whatever innocence she might still have.
Now I want to be clear that, for the most part, I have never initiated a p4p discussion with any dancer even close to that young, but I have responded to offers.
The one exception to this was the girl in Atlanta, where I am ashamed to admit that I used my normal gentle nudging tactics to get things to the right place. Now to be clear, it was certainly not her first time at the rodeo, at least ITC, but nonetheless it has haunted me. And, given her confusion with how hotels worked, she was clearly not accustomed to doing OTC. :-\
Never again will I mess around with a girl that young.
shift_6x
01-05-2012, 10:14 PM
Then go to the ballet ::) Our hustle abilities are what makes us MONEY at our JOB. People seem to forget that this is how we make a living. Tipping me $1 for doing polework isn't going to pay my rent. Buying dances from me is. For me to get dances out of you, I'm most likely going to have to hustle you. Especially you. I don't see you being a very easy sell.
ANd in my line of dancing I make no money off poletricks. My money is purely on being personalble. ANd Im doing an amazing job. That keeps me in the business. I know my angle and I work it with extreme precision. This has been a great week thus far. The above disliked poster simply needs to piss off.
shift_6x
01-05-2012, 10:16 PM
Rick--Stick to upper 20s-early 30s..Ull have better luck if ur looking for experience. Ur smart u know whats what..
yoda57us
01-06-2012, 09:41 AM
Never again will I mess around with a girl that young.
Wise decision rick...
shift_6x
01-06-2012, 01:41 PM
Shift, you don't have to justify yourself to him or anyone else. It doesn't matter whether you dance in a bikini or fully nude, nor does it matter whether or not you give lapdances. He has an extremely myopic view of the world and he is in the wrong church preaching to the wrong congregation.
Thank u for saying that I do not have to justify myself. However, bc most of the clubs that the majority of girls on SW who dance in clubs are employed at r lapdance clubs, I wanted to inform everyone of how it works in my area. I made several intelligent points and my earlier post was purely informative. I really dont have a problem standing up for myself or what I believe in.
bem401
01-06-2012, 07:51 PM
As someone who teaches HS and some college age girls, I have never been comfortable around girls looking like they are that young. Running into former students has also been unsettling regardless how many years ago they graduated,
rickdugan
05-28-2012, 08:21 PM
I just found out that my local club fav lied about her age. She is actually a bit younger than she originally claimed. Now she is still old enough to drink, but not my much. She explained to me that she did so because people used to call her a baby when she told them the truth, so she added a couple of years on to the total.
When I expressed my surprise and perhaps a slight touch of dismay, she said to me, "Well, it's too late now." As is well chronicled on here, she is right, for the obvious reasons.
*sigh*
yoda57us
05-29-2012, 01:51 PM
Fifteen or twenty years ago I may have been in the same boat as you rick. Back in my early days of clubing and seeing escorts...okay, they were street walkers back then...I was pretty indiscriminate about age. I had a dancer ATF back in the 80's who got hired at a club that required girls to be 21 even though she was only seventeen. It was actually pretty common back then. There was no such thing as contact and any girl who could produce an I.D showing she was of age could get hired. With the streetwalkers it was a bit different. When you are driving around watching all of these gorgeous woman strut their stuff (and yes, in Boston in the 80 and early 90's some the hookers were drop-dead gorgeous)it becomes far to easy to find a dark alley or a hotel room with a girl who may not be of legal age. Ultimately it was one of the reasons I stopped picking up hookers and going to massage parlors back then...
Jay12
05-29-2012, 02:04 PM
Not a big fan of the big meat curtains so I do enjoy the younger gals now and again. I used to go to a place in Providence. Every gal in the place except for the Bar maid had a C-section scar and what I call Watoosie tits. Their tits looked like a baseball in the end of a toob sock
.
.
Hey I guess I do support single moms..............
How do you know they are single? There are several dancers who are actually married. Some do tell customers, some don't.
rickdugan
05-29-2012, 06:50 PM
Fifteen or twenty years ago I may have been in the same boat as you rick. Back in my early days of clubing and seeing escorts...okay, they were street walkers back then...I was pretty indiscriminate about age..
But the issue for me is that I DO care and have for some months now. I didn't want to be messing around with a girl this young. I thought that I had a legit mid-20s hottie, which was perfect to me. I no longer want to fuck around with girls in their late teens and early 20s - it is fucking up my head. The situation I now find myself in simply sucks.
yoda57us
05-29-2012, 07:36 PM
But the issue for me is that I DO care and have for some months now. I didn't want to be messing around with a girl this young. I thought that I had a legit mid-20s hottie, which was perfect to me. I no longer want to fuck around with girls in their late teens and early 20s - it is fucking up my head. The situation I now find myself in simply sucks.
Well, I'm not saying that you don't care rick but what can you really do about it now? If you are still seeing her you can of course stop but that won't change what's already happened. The fact is girls lie about their age all the time. The older ones lie about being younger and, yes, the younger ones lie about being older. There is no foolproof system other than trust and, clearly, that doesn't always work. It's not that I'm unsympathetic but maybe I've just been doing this longer. At any rate, your story doesn't surprise me nearly as much as it appears to have surprised you.
lopaw
05-29-2012, 09:32 PM
I just found out that my local club fav lied about her age. She is actually a bit younger than she originally claimed. Now she is still old enough to drink, but not my much. She explained to me that she did so because people used to call her a baby when she told them the truth, so she added a couple of years on to the total.
When I expressed my surprise and perhaps a slight touch of dismay, she said to me, "Well, it's too late now." As is well chronicled on here, she is right, for the obvious reasons.
*sigh*
Oh sweet jeebus how I have also walked in those shoes.
I had a dancer tell me that she was 23 when in fact she had just turned 18 a month before I met her. I happened to see her DL when she took it out while being carded at a club that she was auditioning for. I was FURIOUS. We had been meeting OTC for months and the thought that she was BARELY 18 when we started doing naughty stuff really bothered me. I broke it off immediately, but she couldn't understand what the problem was. Tsk. Children :no:.
But like in your situation, rick - it's too late now. What's done is done. Lessons learned, I guess.
rickdugan
05-31-2012, 04:45 AM
Well, I'm not saying that you don't care rick but what can you really do about it now? If you are still seeing her you can of course stop but that won't change what's already happened. The fact is girls lie about their age all the time. The older ones lie about being younger and, yes, the younger ones lie about being older. There is no foolproof system other than trust and, clearly, that doesn't always work. It's not that I'm unsympathetic but maybe I've just been doing this longer. At any rate, your story doesn't surprise me nearly as much as it appears to have surprised you.
LOL and fair enough. I don't have your years under my belt, but by most standards I've been doing this for a long time. I think the reason that this is all so fresh for me is that, until recently, I really didn't care about the age as long as she was legal. Now I have used age as a filtering tool for OTC prospects, but I never really probed too deeply and, if a hot younger dancer made the offer or otherwise came across as willing, then my "filtering processes" went out the window.
Shit, I remember one of my early exchanges with you on this site where I mentioned having two twenty year olds in their hotel room for 2 girl OTC, even gloating that "20+20 does NOT = 40." Fast forward a couple of years and I just don't think that I would do that now with girls that young.
yoda57us
05-31-2012, 02:49 PM
We all go through changes in what we are looking for. Part of it for me is maturity and wanting to be with women that I can carry on a conversation. When I was younger I just wanted the dances or the sex. As I got older and my marriage started to disintegrate I began to spend more time in clubs and with escorts and also began to develop friendships with them. I'll still see women in their mid 20's but I'm most comfortable with women who are over 30. At some point five or six years ago the creep factor started to set in for me as I realized that I had been with women who were only a few years older than my kid and her friends from college. No thanks....
Toe Tag
06-01-2012, 08:49 AM
Good point on the "creep" factor. Its hard to have a good time when your telling yourself, why yes she is the same age as my daughter.
kdogg247
06-01-2012, 10:13 AM
All the young chicks tell me that age is just a number.
yoda57us
06-01-2012, 04:49 PM
All the young chicks tell me that age is just a number.
Yeah, they always say that to old guys....
kdogg247
06-03-2012, 12:17 PM
Yeah, they always say that to old guys....
It beats "Wow, you're old."
lestat1
06-04-2012, 07:59 PM
I'm 33 and I haven't yet hit the point where a young dancer seems too young, although I've historically gravitated towards dancers who've been doing it for at least a few years. The newbies don't know how to flirt and be seductive and I'm too introverted to carry the conversation by myself so me + young/newbie dancer usually fizzles out on its own pretty quickly. As far as extras go, reading SW is pretty much the only time I'm made aware that they exist.
fallyn_love
06-04-2012, 08:21 PM
a stripper is a stripper
like im confused...wtf do you want other than a dance?
As I sit here and think of the various dicey activities that I engaged in with dancers during 2011, one thing that sticks out in my mind is the downtrending in the ages of the girls that are offering up alternative services.
I am not sure how to feel about this. For many years, the girls that I engaged in edgier activities with were at least in their mid to late 20s and, since I was 40 and under myself, I didn't think much of it. However, I am now getting older while, at the same time, the girls offering these things are getting younger. Shit, some of the girls that made offers to me in 2011 were not old enough to drink, while I am 41.
This changing dynamic is starting to give me pause. If I was 50 and they were 30, then I doubt that I would care so much, but at 19 or 20 most girls know so little about life and their options that it makes me wonder how informed their choices really are. The sad aspect to this is that many of them have never seen this business any other way than it is today. It is quite conceivable that the young ones that work in dirtier clubs may very well just assume that this is the way that these things work.
Anyway, in 2012 I think that I will need to set a higher minimum age standard for my dicier activities. I simply no longer feel comfortable messing around with a girl who is not only young enough to be my daughter (albeit I would have needed to have her at 21 or 22), but is also too young to make decisions with her eyes wide open. :-\
Anyway, just my :twocents: fwiw.
fallyn_love
06-04-2012, 08:27 PM
its an art, a learned skill. some girls are naturals and some arent. it has nothing to do with age.
younger women shouldnt be dancing, maybe old ass men shouldnt be in the club.
you dont want a dance from a girl young enough to be your daughter, maybe nobody wants to dance for a lonely ass man.
its kinda bad to say they dont know what they want in life yet, everyones not the same.
dont judge because of age.
thats like me saying everyold man in the club is here because he's lonely, is wifes dead, snd he just needs someone to talk to. who said we wanted to here that sad ass convo, or boring shit that you THINK we want to hear.
rickdugan
06-05-2012, 05:08 AM
a stripper is a stripper
like im confused...wtf do you want other than a dance?
LOL fallyn. I see that you are 19 and have only been dancing for a couple of weeks. As you get a little more experience under your belt, what you are going to learn is that there are a certain number of dancers who engage in edgier activities with customers for negotiated amounts.
In some of the dicier clubs, this stuff may even happen inside the club, but there are also some dancers who make additional income through dealings with customers outside of the club, such as in hotel rooms. In fact, it is not uncommon and I would bet that there are at least a couple of girls at your own club who have either done this or are still actively doing so.
its an art, a learned skill. some girls are naturals and some arent. it has nothing to do with age.
younger women shouldnt be dancing, maybe old ass men shouldnt be in the club.
you dont want a dance from a girl young enough to be your daughter, maybe nobody wants to dance for a lonely ass man.
its kinda bad to say they dont know what they want in life yet, everyones not the same.
dont judge because of age.
thats like me saying everyold man in the club is here because he's lonely, is wifes dead, snd he just needs someone to talk to. who said we wanted to here that sad ass convo, or boring shit that you THINK we want to hear.
Relax fallyn. :) All I was trying to say is that I feel like a bit of a creep by messing around with girls that young. It was no shot at younger dancers and there are plenty of guys who do not share my particular scruples.
And I have no doubt that anything I have to say would seem quite boring to a 19 year old girl. ;)
tempest666
06-05-2012, 06:28 AM
I have a dancer friend that is 22, has 3 kids and has her head on straight better than me. I have a friend in her mid 30's who's snorting coke and got her kids taken away. I'm more interested in life experience. That's my :twocents:
rickdugan
06-05-2012, 06:06 PM
I have a dancer friend that is 22, has 3 kids and has her head on straight better than me. I have a friend in her mid 30's who's snorting coke and got her kids taken away. I'm more interested in life experience. That's my :twocents:
Tempest, I hear what you are saying and I can certainly see those types of situations. On the whole though, I find that dancers in the 21 and younger category tend to be much less sophisticated or mature than their older counterparts.
Imagine this scene. A kind looking 40 something year old guy, in a nice suit, is sitting at the bar of a club in some small city down south. He is relaxed and has a friendly expression on his face. She of course approaches and asks to sit, which he agrees to with a gentle and kind smile. They chat for a while, during which she learns that he travels the country for work and has an important sounding job while he learns that she is a 19 year old local kid who got knocked up at 17, has never been on a plane, doesn't own a car and has a questionable baby Daddy situation going on. The discussion affirms her belief that he has money to spend and his belief that she really needs it. He gives her a taste from his bankroll, but sadly declines dances as it is "just not his gig", during which point he gives her a wistful smile. Remembering the bankroll in his pocket, how kind he has been to her and just how low her cash is, she makes the OTC offer - believing the whole time that it was her own idea. ;)
Now I didn't mention the little things that happened during their conversation, like his boyish grins when she made a joke, how calm and gentle he seemed throughout or how she learned that he was staying in a very nice hotel close by, but you get the picture.
I don't imagine for one second that I don't have the advantage over a 19 year old kid or that I cannot manipulate at least some of them. This is why I no longer mess around with girls that young.
fallyn_love
06-08-2012, 09:26 PM
i kinda see what u guys are sayinh but then again its just about her mind set aka maturity
tempest666
06-09-2012, 01:33 AM
One of the things I have noticed in my other club is most of the more mature dancers (I hate saying "older") look wayyyy better than the lumpy little 18 year old doughballs. I hope when I hit 30+ I look like them. If I could drag my ass outta bed I would totally work Cougartown shift. :D
Toe Tag
06-11-2012, 10:06 AM
Cougartown, hehe I like that.
Kessler
06-15-2012, 02:08 AM
Late to the party, but Rick, in your mind, she was the age she told you - that was your reality, so your 'standards' were still intact, so to speak. You didn't and couldn't have known differently unless she told you the truth.
But now you know. And you feel skeezy, you ol' dog. Kidding. Kinda. So if you continue OTC activities with your new knowledge... well, now you have something to feel bad about. Because you're breaking your own self-imposed rule.
Alllllll that being said, only you know how self-aware she is of the situation and your agreement - whether she's fully aware or whether she's fully naive. After a certain point, age isn't the only requirement for maturity, as you know. I'm not saying she fully knows what she's getting into, nor am I saying she doesn't. Only you can decide that since you're the only one who knows her.
Don't worry about the past - you can be mad she lied, but don't be mad at yourself. How were you supposed to know, really? But if you continue, knowing what you know now, and you still feel bad... well, yeah, then maybe you should stop and find another, slightly older fav?
Just my penny's worth.
skylight
04-17-2013, 03:05 AM
I don't think anyone in her 30s should be called a cougar. 40s minumum.
AmyLynne
04-17-2013, 09:49 AM
As Ive grown up as a person and as a dancer my limits and what Im willing to do have changed quite a bit. I used to be dead set against extras or OTC and now that's all I seem to do. Things evolve and morals and values evolve with them.
whirlerz
04-22-2013, 07:58 PM
As an old bee-otch, I think I look pretty damn good:)
simone87
04-22-2013, 08:13 PM
wow i've always loved how much younger i look and get told im " naive, innocent and young looking" all my life.. but after reading this im starting to think maybe i should try and look a bit older! never thought that was unattractive but now hmmm..
Golden_Rule
04-26-2013, 12:15 PM
Hmm, where to take this since all the dancers are all younger in my mind. I've got two decades on mid-thirty's dancers. So I'd have to say younger and much younger.
Since much of my now limited S-C cavorting is aimed at engaging the dancer in question to see me outside the club over an extended period I do tend to gravitate toward women closer to my own age. As pointed out above this still means they are considerably younger than I am.
The reason for this is that the resulting "dating" that takes place involves considerable time in the vertical plane, not simply horizontal. To spend time with someone you are actually involved with in prolonged conversation requires someone with something to talk about. I find the much younger dancers to have a rather limited range of topics to discuss. Not because they can't speak to a multitude of issues, but more precisely they tend to only have a few subjects they are actually interested in discussing. Most of which have something to do with some mundane matter of their existence. They can't last on a topic that has something to do with anything taking place more than 10 feet beyond their pretty noses. The level of self-absorption is mind numbing.
I can deal with it for awhile, but not long.
I find older dancers more interested in speaking about things outside the boundaries of what is taking place immediately around them. Therefore their company is more interesting. The sex is better too. 8)