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View Full Version : Has your ATF ever "jumped the shark"?



jbviper4
01-12-2012, 11:12 AM
and what was the event that caused you to move on?I have had a great ATF for the past 4 months. Local dive bar, she is a 10 all around...great body, beautiful face, sexy outfits and the ability to completely engage me in chat and LDs every time. Shes smart, hot and never gave me any hustle whatsoever. I drop about $400 a week (which evidently makes me a high roller in this dump) across 2 - 3 visits and don't regret a dime of it. I buy drinks and tip $2-5 for every 2 song set for all the ladies. Always a good time. About a month into her ATF status, she mentioned about having to miss a friend's wedding out of state due to lack of funds. As it happened, I had a free flight which was about to expire and I gave it to her. She went, had a great time, and we resumed our iTC activities at the usual spend rate. At the end of one of our visits, she handed me a paper she was writing for grad school and asked if I would read it and give her my opinion. I said to myself, "This is some unusually interesting SS" and I said sure (I'm a prof at another college). It was really good, and I told her so when we "celebrated" Xmas in the club. I gave her (and all of the other BTs and ladies) a little "bonus" (I had a good year). ATF's bonus was double the others. She took off for a week (not because of the bonus alone...lol)While shes gone (see Trip Report, I had a good time), I visit her place once and three different dancers, all of whom I know pretty well, ask me what they needed to do to get ATFs bank while she's away. Now, I know stripperdrama when I hear it, so I ignore it until one of my better acquaintances tells me pretty much exactly how much and what I spend on ATF. I hate Dressing Room accounting. Tell other girls what I spend on you = jump the shark.She and I spent our last lovely evening together last night...and she pretty much confirmed that my recon was correct when she told me she was moving as soon as she could raise $X....and that her phone was going to get turned off...and she needed something else....I bought two ovepriced LDs and walked away. Too bad. It was great while it lasted. Good thing I found some good candidates last week!

kaiarose
01-12-2012, 11:22 AM
All good things must come to an end. You were a great reg while it lasted :) There will be many more ATF's I'm sure.

jbviper4
01-12-2012, 11:30 AM
All good things must come to an end. You were a great reg while it lasted :) There will be many more ATF's I'm sure.She said she wants to head back to WI....watch out! She's a great girl in all other respects...really great pole dancer!

kaiarose
01-12-2012, 11:34 AM
WI really?! That's cool :) I work in a little town that has no pole onstage so I ain't worried ;)

jbviper4
01-12-2012, 11:51 AM
According to her backstory, thats home for her.

In any event, she just shot me a text (first time since a thanks for the plane ticket three months ago) and told me to come in today for my "Xmas present."

My big head says move on, but my little one says "free LD?" LOL.

kaiarose
01-12-2012, 12:11 PM
LOL!! It's cool that all you're expecting is a free LD.. it's refreshing :)

jbviper4
01-12-2012, 12:27 PM
Actually, I'm only expecting to go in and pay for an expensive boner that no one gets to use but me (and probably more tales of fiscal woe). She'll probably give me a card and another paper to read in my free time.

Raider
01-12-2012, 01:37 PM
Actually, smart move on her part to have you come in for a 'present'. Unless you can duck in and out real fast it is probably anticipated that you will at minimum get a couple of dances from her and buy her a drink. Plus, there is the chance she could entice you to stay longer.....all for what cost her a bottle of cologne or a shirt / tie.

jbviper4
01-12-2012, 02:03 PM
Actually, smart move on her part to have you come in for a 'present'. Unless you can duck in and out real fast it is probably anticipated that you will at minimum get a couple of dances from her and buy her a drink. Plus, there is the chance she could entice you to stay longer.....all for what cost her a bottle of cologne or a shirt / tie.

It's a classic move. She's an earner, no doubt about that.

I just object to having my tuition contributions (personal "gifts" included) tallied in the DR like its a telethon or something.

I'll TOFTT and go all in to see what the "present" is!

Raider
01-12-2012, 02:11 PM
Can certainly understand the frustration with the dressing room conversations about your contributions. I am certain she wouldn't appreciate you discussing her approach with you during dances to other customers and giving specifics.

Let us know what the 'present' is. I had similar situation where a semi-regular asked prior to holidays when I would be back because she had gifts for her better customers. Obviously, I felt obligated then to bring her a gift....turned out she was too busy with family to go shopping and get anything for 'us better customers'. No real shock there !!!! Hell...I would have been happy with a hug and her buying me a drink. I just made sure I was busy with someone else so it actually cost her in the long run. Ha.....

jbviper4
01-12-2012, 02:17 PM
Can certainly understand the frustration with the dressing room conversations about your contributions. I am certain she wouldn't appreciate you discussing her approach with you during dances to other customers and giving specifics.

Let us know what the 'present' is. I had similar situation where a semi-regular asked prior to holidays when I would be back because she had gifts for her better customers. Obviously, I felt obligated then to bring her a gift....turned out she was too busy with family to go shopping and get anything for 'us better customers'. No real shock there !!!! Hell...I would have been happy with a hug and her buying me a drink. I just made sure I was busy with someone else so it actually cost her in the long run. Ha.....

I will def go in tonight or tomorrow.

I truly expect nothing...I think she has simply "jumped the shark" and has decided to turn up the heat on my $$$ to maximize ROI before her planned escape. Which would be completely cool if she kept it to herself...I am certain that she has an MO to her hustle...just took so long to get to this point... I thought I was really "special" to her LOL...

lopaw
01-12-2012, 08:27 PM
Actually I think it's pretty naive to not expect that much of what happens ITC (good & bad) is greatly detailed in the DR, especially amongst dancer buddies. Monetary transactions, as well as who's buying and who isn't, is probably at the top of the list of things that are shared. It's just that most of the time we as PL's don't ever get to find out about it.

FWIW, I totally agree that it's not in our best interest and I would not be pleased were I to discover it firsthand. But it's not a show-stopper for me....it's just a part of doing business in a stripclub.

jbviper4
01-13-2012, 06:40 AM
Well, I swung by last night and she was just coming down from the stage. I ordered our usual drinks and asked "whats the present?". She smiled and said she would get dressed and go grab it from the car. She did, and I was surprised to see that it was actually a thoughtful gift...

I had totally forgotten about this, but when I read her paper (on the Japanese form of poetry, Haiku) she texted and asked for some feedback. I hadn't finished reading it, so I responded to her in (terribly amateurish) haiku. We shared a laugh about it the next time I visited and moved on.

During her week away, she attended a writing seminar and it made her think of my (bad) haiku. She bought me a book on haiku.

I thanked her for the genuinely thoughtful gift, made my typical (non-LD) contribution for her beauty and had to go. I feel a little bad for designating her as a "shark jumping hustler", but then again, "the force is strong with this one..." LOL

rickdugan
01-13-2012, 07:04 AM
Everything that lopaw said. Dancing is an emotionally hard job and many of these girls develop support networks inside the clubs. You simply need to accept that, as a regular in the club, girls with whom your fav interacts are going to have a handle on what you do there. This can be both good and bad, depending upon the type of customer you are, but IME there is not much to be done about it.

Now it was terribly bad form the another dancer to shoot her mouth off, but human beings don't always do the smartest things. :)

jbviper4
01-13-2012, 07:39 AM
Everything that lopaw said. Dancing is an emotionally hard job and many of these girls develop support networks inside the clubs. You simply need to accept that, as a regular in the club, girls with whom your fav interacts are going to have a handle on what you do there. This can be both good and bad, depending upon the type of customer you are, but IME there is not much to be done about it.

Now it was terribly bad form the another dancer to shoot her mouth off, but human beings don't always do the smartest things. :)

Yep. I know I'm an ATM to every ATF.

But, I don't need dancers who I have known for years (in some cases) getting too much intel on my generosity (esp. of the OTC variety). I figure everyone saw me and ATF heading to the rooms, the $20s in the garter, etc and one thing I know all dancers are good at is doing the math. But I didn't necessarily want other girls to know about the flight, "bonuses", and other tokens of my appreciation that I delivered in a more private setting.

Oh well. It frees me to pursue other hobbies and I really like the haiku book.

She's a cool chick who's really good at her job. And it was nice to know she thought of me OTC at least once, and I told her so. It was actually a nice, if quick, visit. As she made her way to me to give me the book, I saw two other gents inquire about her company. She passed and came over, and I had already ordered her drink. We chatted for a minute or two, and I told her straight up that I was in and out so she could spend time working instead of chatting. She thanked me for saying so, but she wanted to hang with me until she finished her drink. Nice.

yoda57us
01-13-2012, 08:04 AM
Every strip club relationship has a shelf life. ATFs and Customers can both manage to screw up a good thing if given enough time. If it's not money it's unrealistic expectations or jealousy. One of the reasons I started going to multiple clubs and having multiple favs was because of the way things ended with one of my first ATFs about ten years ago. The BS that went down, while a deception on her part, only happened because of naivety on my part. Live and learn...

jbviper4
01-13-2012, 08:13 AM
Every strip club relationship has a shelf life. ATFs and Customers can both manage to screw up a good thing if given enough time. If it's not money it's unrealistic expectations or jealousy. One of the reasons I started going to multiple clubs and having multiple favs was because of the way things ended with one of my first ATFs about ten years ago. The BS that went down, while a deception on her part, only happened because of naivety on my part. Live and learn...


True. It's all good. I have met and walked away from several ATFs in my "career"...and perhaps it's on me that this situation bugged me enough to post on it. I always find that when I find myself thinking about SCs (or ATFs) before noon on the day following a visit, then its time to take a (short) break and move on to other pastures for a while.

What was the event where your ATF jumped the shark? Is it post-worthy or has it been covered elsewhere?

rickdugan
01-13-2012, 08:14 AM
Obviously it is your call, but I do believe that you are being a little hard on her. You can be both a customer AND someone that she truly likes.

I have also had this sort of thing happen twice to me recently. In one instance, about a month back at one of my favorite road clubs, it helped me tremendously as a girl that I had previously had an OTC encounter with was leaving the club as I arrived, but was kind enough to bring over a very hot friend. The friend was already prepped on what I did with the other girl the last time and what I contributed, which saved me a lot of wasted time and effort in lining up my fun for the night.

In the second recent incident, a friend of my local fav walked up while we were sitting together and said 'Have a good time on monday night." For a second I just stared, and then I turned to my fav and she said "I tell Karina (not her name of course) everything. I also told Sasha and Marina, who are also my good friends." I was a little nonplussed by this, particularly given the fact that this girl is normally very discreet and was fiendishly difficult to get OTC, but it also made sense as she and these other Russian girls live in the same area, travel to the club together and have worked with each other for years. Also, I have no doubt that my fav wanted somebody to know where she ws and who she was with in the event that I turned out to be a serial killer. ;)

Having said all of that, I do agree that you might be better off taking a break. It sounds like your feelings were hurt and that you somehow felt less special, which makes me wonder if you weren't getting a little too emotionally caught up in this.

Anyway, just my :twocents: fwiw.

jbviper4
01-13-2012, 08:24 AM
Obviously it is your call, but I do believe that you are being a little hard on her. You can be both a customer AND someone that she truly likes.

Having said all of that, I do agree that you might be better off taking a break. It sounds like your feelings were hurt and that you somehow felt less special, which makes me wonder if you weren't getting a little too emotionally caught up in this.

Anyway, just my :twocents: fwiw.

Thats exactly what I was getting at. While sticking to my rules of no personal OTC contact, I was certainly getting a little too infatuated with what was on her mind when I was OTC. Time to move on.

No worries. According to my handy dandy smartphone, both of my new ATF candidates are scheduled at another club this afternoon, and I just happen to have the afternoon off. Let the games begin!

yoda57us
01-13-2012, 08:56 AM
What was the event where your ATF jumped the shark? Is it post-worthy or has it been covered elsewhere?

Eh, it's not that big of a deal...which is kinda my point.

jbviper4
01-13-2012, 10:08 AM
Eh, it's not that big of a deal...which is kinda my point.

I let this turn into a TR when it was an honest question in my OP - trying to see if my SS rader is calibrated the same as other SCJs. No biggie...I've been at it long enough to trust my instincts and act accordingly.

Kessler
01-13-2012, 08:32 PM
Fwiw, I'm probably more touchy about certain things, but dancer gossip in the back never bothers me. Like lopaw said, I expect it - how much I'm spending, my mood, frequency, manners, conversation, etc. In fact, my fav regularly tells me what a girl said about me in the back. I think the only thing that would bother me is if I heard that a girl was talking shit about me since I try to spend a fair amount and be mutually respectful. It's just like non-SC environments - I wouldn't want to hang/pay anyone like that outside the club either.

lopaw
01-13-2012, 11:07 PM
A perfect example of this just happened to me tonight. I set up a "date" with "dancer XYZ" for tomorrow. I like to do "date" nights at one particular club because there are just too many dancers vying for attention. Alot of the girls know that I do this, and seem to accept it. Anyway - "dancer ABC" texts that she would like to set up a date with me. Fine, I think. Before I get a chance to text back that tomorrow is booked already, she texts back "would you like to have our date tomorrow night after "dancer XYZ", or next week instead?".

Jesus.
Is nothing sacred?

Obviously they are sharing intel.
I'm not thrilled, and also hardly surprised.

yoda57us
01-14-2012, 07:20 AM
"dancer ABC" texts that she would like to set up a date with me. Fine, I think. Before I get a chance to text back that tomorrow is booked already, she texts back "would you like to have our date tomorrow night after "dancer XYZ", or next week instead?".

Jesus.
Is nothing sacred?

Obviously they are sharing intel.
I'm not thrilled, and also hardly surprised.

I'll never forget my first night at one of my favorite clubs after my then-ATF had suddenly quit. She was Brazilian and, for two years, all of the other Brazilian dancers at her club had maintained a "hands-off" policy towards me. Well, I show up, sit down at the bar and you would have thought I was wearing a coat made out of $100 bills! Within minutes I had about six different South Americans hitting on me for attention and dances as they all jockeyed for position as my new ATF.

I felt like a piece of meat with a wallet...

Funny thing is, I wanted nothing to do with any of them. I ended up going to the stage, tipping the cutest and quietest Brazilian in the club-and the one girl who did not approach me looking for my business. We did a dance, then five, then ten and I was hooked! She was my ATF until she retired a few years later and we remain friends to this day.

Raider
01-14-2012, 07:53 AM
I don't mind talk about how many dances are done as at the club I frequent it is real easy for the ladies to check the clip board where dances are marked and see how many were done by each dancer. I don't like talk about tipping as it may not be consistent from one night to the next let alone from one dancer to the next. Nor do I like chat about details of time spent dancing and what went on (not extras). Not going to get specific but when a lady that has never danced with you, walks up....sits down and starts doing little things that you like done then it is obvious there is talk going on. I guess that can be a good thing though because if I am interested in dances then I don't have to sit there and say....I like this...I like that...etc , etc. I like the ladies that keep things to themselves yet how would you really know if they do or not??? On the flip side, I am sure the ladies realize we might describe a dance as fair, good or great yet don't think they would like us giving detailed explanations of what made it that way.

lopaw
01-14-2012, 08:26 PM
....I felt like a piece of meat with a wallet...


lol!
Man, if that expression isn't apropos!
I should have that phrase made into a button, and wear it while clubbing next week ;D

rockie
01-15-2012, 04:44 PM
My experience is that you can never predict what is and isn't discussed about you. If she's your ATF, then what is it that she really did to change your club dynamic to a negative future experience. If you have to fend off a couple of ladies that want to hop on to the "gravy train", then kindly rebuff whatever speculation activity comes about and get over it! I certainly move on from favs who believe that our club friendliness reduces the entertainment quotient that made them a fav in the first place!

Kessler
01-16-2012, 03:15 AM
Actually, I kinda dig some of the talk backstage - I'm not getting approached nearly as much since most of the girls know I'm there to see my fav.

The other week, a new girl was chatting me up even after I told her I was waiting for someone... first time that happened. So I tried to be polite and make small talk. When my fav came out, she was laughing, saying how, in five minutes, three different girls came to the back and reported how she should hurry up and get on the floor since I was getting 'lured away'. She knew that wouldn't happen, but we both found it nice that the other girls stuck up for her.

magicrat
01-16-2012, 04:39 PM
A few years ago I as in a club for an entire afternoon and received a very very nice "dance" from one of the dancers (say Dancer A). I hang around, have a few drinks and meet a new to me dancer (Dancer B) and we head to the back. Things are progressing very nicely toward another very very nice "dance" from Dancer B and I ask about the cost for this type of "dance". Her reply "well it has to be at least $x since that's what you paid A". So I assume pretty much everything is shared with someone in the club. It didn't really bother me at all since I figured some of the dancers realized that I appreciated certain types of dances.

mariesgame
01-16-2012, 05:01 PM
What is an ATF??

yoda57us
01-16-2012, 05:57 PM
ATF= All Time Favorite

startngate
02-09-2012, 09:48 PM
I have a friend who is notorious for liking to stir things up at a club. I had an ATF at one club we frequented who was also the 'queen bee' of the club.

To have some fun (and get me in trouble) my buddy bought me a dance with another dancer while my ATF was on stage. We went to the LD area and while waiting for the next song to start my ATF shot a glaring look in our direction. The dancer handed me the money back and said 'I can't dance for you.'

ATF and I got 'divorced' 10 minutes later.

BouncerDude
02-10-2012, 02:29 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^
When your money is not yours to spend anymore, it is time to move on.

Let_It_Fly
02-22-2012, 06:21 AM
^^^ What he said...that type of situation can get awkward & unpleasant very quickly. This is one of the cons of being (for lack of a better term) "exclusive" with a dancer.

firemaiden04
03-22-2012, 08:11 PM
I guess I don't understand dancers telling each other how much guys are spending on them, because whenever I see dancers find out that one girl's reg is a big spender, they'll start swarming all over him and much drama will ensue. I had a guy who used to tip $100 for each song in the private room, and he'd buy 5-10 dances a night, and whenever nosy strippers would come up to me and ask, "How much money is he giving you?" I'd be like, "Eh, not a lot, I'm just bored and don't feel like trying to hustle anyone else in here." To me, discussing money in the DR was always a huge faux pas. I also think that it's kind of throwing your regular under the bus when you tell girls he spends, because any halfway decent regular does NOT want the vultures descending and fighting over him and refusing to leave him alone. Too much drama. Any regular who enjoys that type of attention is probably a major drama queen and I don't want to deal with that.

yoda57us
03-23-2012, 07:38 AM
I I also think that it's kind of throwing your regular under the bus when you tell girls he spends, because any halfway decent regular does NOT want the vultures descending and fighting over him and refusing to leave him alone. Too much drama. Any regular who enjoys that type of attention is probably a major drama queen and I don't want to deal with that.

Totally agree with this! Oddly enough there ARE guys who enjoy the attention (drama) either in the club or on sites like this one. I much prefer to keep a lower profile in the club. This is probably why all of my long-term favs seem to be hard working but quiet girls who don't spend a lot of time yapping with the other girls at their club. Of course, plenty of dancers "stalk" guys and count how many dances or VIP's they do with their co-workers but what they see is not always the whole story...