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Missymissdemeanour
08-16-2013, 03:03 PM
Just a quickie:

Tip Dodger: Ass bb
Missdemeanour: Mirror bb

Tip Dodger leaves :)

Snowy0Star
08-16-2013, 03:35 PM
Just a quickie:

Tip Dodger: Ass bb
Missdemeanour: Mirror bb

Tip Dodger leaves :)

fuck yes i say this too i get this all the time on cb when ppl say show asshole i tell them go look in a mirror then ull c an asshole or ass bb yes i have an ass or yes i know ur ass what about it? i got a million of em =^y^=

fantasyin8bit
08-19-2013, 04:25 AM
Oh, how guest typos are so much fun.

Guest: Show me ur bobs bb
Me: Are you sure you don't want to see my Steves instead?


Guest: bb im hard for u can u see it
Me: Does it look like I have a microscope?


Guest: can you stand?
Me: I have no legs.
Guest: wat?
Me: I lost them in the war. *stares somewhere off camera without blinking for a good minute*

(though now I have a free loader that comes back every day insisting on seeing my "stumps")

MissSeraphim
08-21-2013, 08:58 PM
"Hit me up if yuh wanna fuk .? "
Me: Hit me up when you're old enough to grammar.

I've been doing super awesome lately being a smart ass about guys tipping for stuff and it's been working like a charm! Most the time I was just joking thinking oh nothings really going to happen.

LaceyCummings
08-23-2013, 05:09 PM
cheapassbitch: Are there enough people in here for a gold show???
ME: Is there enough money in your bank account for an exclusive show?

Before he could respond, I got a pvt. Not exclusive, but still. :)

* I know a lot of girls do gold shows, and it works for them. Personally, they are not for me, but I respect everyone's hustle.

Jade62013
08-26-2013, 07:45 PM
Some guy I've never talked to in my life sent me a message with an attachment pic of his dick saying "Do you think my cock is big or small? BE HONEST. Also do you do foot fetish in exclusive? xoxo Asshat" At first i replied that I refuse to open attachments from people I don't know. Then, I changed my mind and I decided to send him a message saying "Sorry for the message earlier bb. Turns out I'm feeling VERY frisky tonight and decided to send you MY OWN dirty naughty sexy nude! What do you think bb? AM I HOT? Be honest!" Then I attached a picture file titled, dirty sexy naughty nude.jpg. It was a picture of an elephantitis man's genitals all bloody in the middle of surgery. MWAHAHAHA

roast
08-27-2013, 08:48 AM
Webcam hobbyists (http://jennydemilo.com/2010/04/client-vrs-hobbyist/)kill me:

Msg (summarized) "If you drop your price to 1.99. Ill leave you a great review. Thanks."
My response: "Awww, this site doesnt have written reviews, but thanks for the offer :) Hope to see you soon!"
Msg reply: "Yes it does, Ive been on here for years."
My response: "Me too infact :) Glad you like my profile so much to msg me - see you soon!
Msg reply: "Great, did you drop it? Too high, youll get a great review and more business."

-no answer from me-

-hour or two later, he's in pvt-

Him: "You didnt drop your price"
Me: "Welcome, so glad youre here :)"
Him: "So log off, lower it, and Ill log back in"
Me: "Im sooo horny how about you? Mmmmm" -squeezes boobies-
Him: "Can you log off?"
Me: "Oh god, I need to cum so baddd"
Him: "Log off and drop your price so we can start over and youll get a great review"

-note: he's still in pvt. and my rate is still not lower-

Me: "Mmmmmmmm yeaaaaa" -strips- "FUCK I need to cum"
Him: "Hello? Ill call you a ripoff in your comments"
Me: "Ohhhhhhhh fuck yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaa look at my tits"
Him: "Hello?!"

-note: again this site has no written comments. and he's still in pvt. oh, and Im naked.-

Him: "No one will come see you in pvt from your bad review."
Me: "OH fuck me [screen name] Ive needed to cum all dayyyyy dont be maddddd" -dry slow golf claps of a pussy slap- "OH YEA that's it! Slap my pussy"
Him: "Why arent you signing off?"
Him: "Do as I say. Ive been a longtime member here, I can report you."
Me: "oh GOD my nipples are so hard [screen name] FUCK MEEEEEEEE"

-it goes on like this for 10mins through my porno-satirical 'orgasm'-


-he leaves. forgets to rate me.-

I laughed maniacally at my screen for a good 3minutes after he left.

justanothercamgirl
08-27-2013, 04:35 PM
Webcam hobbyists (http://jennydemilo.com/2010/04/client-vrs-hobbyist/)kill me:

Msg (summarized) "If you drop your price to 1.99. Ill leave you a great review. Thanks."
My response: "Awww, this site doesnt have written reviews, but thanks for the offer :) Hope to see you soon!"
Msg reply: "Yes it does, Ive been on here for years."
My response: "Me too infact :) Glad you like my profile so much to msg me - see you soon!
Msg reply: "Great, did you drop it? Too high, youll get a great review and more business."

-no answer from me-

-hour or two later, he's in pvt-

Him: "You didnt drop your price"
Me: "Welcome, so glad youre here :)"
Him: "So log off, lower it, and Ill log back in"
Me: "Im sooo horny how about you? Mmmmm" -squeezes boobies-
Him: "Can you log off?"
Me: "Oh god, I need to cum so baddd"
Him: "Log off and drop your price so we can start over and youll get a great review"

-note: he's still in pvt. and my rate is still not lower-

Me: "Mmmmmmmm yeaaaaa" -strips- "FUCK I need to cum"
Him: "Hello? Ill call you a ripoff in your comments"
Me: "Ohhhhhhhh fuck yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaa look at my tits"
Him: "Hello?!"

-note: again this site has no written comments. and he's still in pvt. oh, and Im naked.-

Him: "No one will come see you in pvt from your bad review."
Me: "OH fuck me [screen name] Ive needed to cum all dayyyyy dont be maddddd" -dry slow golf claps of a pussy slap- "OH YEA that's it! Slap my pussy"
Him: "Why arent you signing off?"
Him: "Do as I say. Ive been a longtime member here, I can report you."
Me: "oh GOD my nipples are so hard [screen name] FUCK MEEEEEEEE"

-it goes on like this for 10mins through my porno-satirical 'orgasm'-


-he leaves. forgets to rate me.-

I laughed maniacally at my screen for a good 3minutes after he left.

34837

justanothercamgirl
08-27-2013, 04:40 PM
I've been enjoying the end of my MFC shifts lately when no one has tipped me.

I spent the last 2 minutes of my shift telling them all how they are all cruel because they are murdering my camscore by just sitting there staring at me. Then I go through all the bad things I hope that will happen to thing during their day because karma bit them in the ass for not tipping that nice MFC camgirl.

Some of my favourites:

- I hope rats try our your eyes after you fall to sleep tonight.

- I hope that you meet a really pretty girl and right when you get naked and are going to have sex with her she realizes you have the worst skid marks in your underwear that she's ever seen and leaves you with blue balls.

- I hope that you slam your cock in your car door by accident on your way to work today.

Thymian
08-29-2013, 07:18 AM
Big moment of triumph for me this week: banned the jackoff loser who left me the ONLY bad comment on my SM profile. Apparently his 56-second show was a total rip-off and waste of time!

The fact that I was able to do it from within a private just made it even more satisfying and delicious. I hope it felt like being smited by an angry god!

PrincessLavender
09-12-2013, 05:48 AM
It wasn't something I did but it was awesome:

Him: Do you have sound?
Me: No
*Get taken pvt by someone else*
Him: (while I'm in pvt) You going to need to get sound if you're going to charge so much. Get real.

Lmao.

maryjaynexo
09-12-2013, 08:52 AM
I hope that you slam your cock in your car door by accident on your way to work today.

ahahahaha I laughed for a good 5 minutes :)

justanothercamgirl
09-16-2013, 01:42 PM
Meanwhile in the $1 GS

*BestCustie has pledged $1.00 toward your GOLD Show*

BestCustie: hi there goddess

JAC: Please read Gold Show description. This is your $1 preview. No requests or interaction. Want to direct your own personal show? Exclusive $12.99/min | Group $14.99/min

*BestCustie has successfully sent you $10.00 of GOLD*

BestCustie: i love that i cant say anything to you
the way it should be

JAC: ....


BestCustie: would you like more tip

JAC: ....

*BestCustie has successfully sent you $20.00 of GOLD*

JAC: ....

*BestCustie has successfully sent you $20.00 of GOLD*

BestCustie: i should be taking you exclusive goddess

JAC: Please read Gold Show description. This is your $1 preview. No requests or interaction. Want to direct your own personal show? Exclusive $12.99/min | Group $14.99/min

BestCustie: feels like those tits keep demaning tips from me

JAC: ;-)

BestCustie: do i wait till this is done for exclusive

JAC: No privates till October

BestCustie: oh wow
you are amazing

BestCustie: i want to be devout to you

*BestCustie has successfully sent you $20.00 of GOLD*

-- JAC waves hello after receiving a total of $91.00 --

BestCustie: wow did i just earn a wave

justanothercamgirl
09-19-2013, 11:24 AM
AwesomeCustie: ... just saw your number one tag is "bratty"... i have to say that is so hot!... I love bratty girls with a little attitude... never stop

SillyCamgirl
09-19-2013, 12:34 PM
Guest: can you stand?
Me: I have no legs.
Guest: wat?
Me: I lost them in the war. *stares somewhere off camera without blinking for a good minute*

(though now I have a free loader that comes back every day insisting on seeing my "stumps")

AHAHA oh man, I've been fake crying and telling guys I'm in a chair and I can't stand. They freak out.

ChainsawWhore
09-19-2013, 03:27 PM
This is my first post on CC so I'd like to first say THANK YOU for all the honest and helpful advice I've been searching through.

So as far as comebacks here's my fav: This guy said "your pussy looks like my brother's Halloween mask". I replied "Good for him. It's the closest to a pussy that's not your mother's either of you will ever get.".

BluJ
09-19-2013, 07:44 PM
idiot: WHAT STATE ARE IN?
Me: I'm not sure how to answer that.... Most would say that I am in the solid state, but the human body is about 70% water, which would indicated that I am in the liquid state. I, however, like to think of myself as a non-neutonian fluid.

A million times better than my answer! The state of ecstasy, south of the state of confusion, east of a state of emergency and north of a state of the art, ect. ect.

~Carmen~
09-21-2013, 06:49 PM
Asshat: "Aren't you a little old to be doing this?"

Me: "Yes!!! I am way too old to be on here. What was I thinking?"

I usually ignore trolls like this but was in a sarcastic mood today ;)

Sunnylexie
09-27-2013, 08:57 AM
Freebie seeker: You look overdressed
Me: You probably wanted to say I look underpaid?

JaneBurgess
09-27-2013, 05:20 PM
idiot - bb sho me you titts

me - bb show me your wallet

justanothercamgirl
09-28-2013, 09:30 AM
iamajekrbecauseyoudonotdorequestsforfree: Omg your tits are nasty

*iamajekrbecauseyoudonotdorequestsforfree has logged off*

onlytellsthetruth: nope, ive seen nasty, those are lovely

JAC: ;)

seller317
10-19-2013, 01:27 PM
[4:16:06 PM] conor.wild: Mmm
[4:16:29 PM] Holly Fire: hello
[4:17:05 PM] conor.wild: Hi
[4:18:59 PM] Holly Fire: hey
[4:20:34 PM] conor.wild: What can you do for me today :D
[4:20:53 PM] Holly Fire: Depends on what your paying for ;)
[4:21:22 PM] conor.wild: Mmm
[4:21:47 PM] conor.wild: What haven't you done today
[4:22:02 PM] Holly Fire: A free show :D
[4:22:36 PM] conor.wild: Witty
[4:22:41 PM] conor.wild: I like it
[4:23:20 PM] conor.wild: No time like the present

End of conversation lol

Lady Mondegreen
10-19-2013, 02:35 PM
Accidental comeback, sort of, a couple days ago:


SomeAsshole: are u a tranny?
Me: No hun, I think you're in the wrong section if you're looking for a transwoman. I have a strap-on we could play with in exclusive though!
SomeAsshole: eww
SomeAsshole logs off.
Me: *blinkblink* but... OOOOOHHHHH! He wasn't looking for girlcock, he was trying to insult me!



Seriously, I was just trying to be helpful and possibly make a sale :(

AmethystLily
10-19-2013, 02:49 PM
I've definitely shown my cat to losers who want to see my pussy. Taken "can" to mean "able to," explained that I did show people something after having danced, not yet topless. Lifted up my top, but not nearly enough to show my tits. (Hey, I read Ella Enchanted. I know how to go by exact words.)

I have this dildo that's pink and cock-shaped. It's pretty big, and one of the toys I keep near the camera for easy access. It's one of my favourites for many reasons. Anyway, next time someone tries to impress me with their cock size, I'm going to say, "Unless it's bigger than this, I'm not going to be impressed."

Thanks for this thread. I may refer to it from time to time when I'm having a shitty night.

Sunnylexie
10-21-2013, 12:11 AM
Dick: wanna fuck suka*?
Me: wanna suck fuka? *BAN*

Russian for "bitch" but more insulting. He possibly meant "sucker", though - whatever, he sucks anyway))

HaydenBlue
10-24-2013, 02:29 AM
tweedledum: do a 5 sec sample demo
i like samples, just like costco

me: Yeah, well you need a membership to get into Costco, so you still need to pay for it

he left :D

Renton
10-24-2013, 05:25 AM
idiot - bb sho me you titts

me - bb show me your wallet

haha I've done plenty of variations on that one :D "show me your tits" usually gets "show me your money"

AmethystLily
10-26-2013, 07:43 PM
After probably the 137th time I was asked if I wanted to see someone's penis:

Me: "I know what a penis looks like, and I have access to one that's probably bigger than yours."

Snowy0Star
10-26-2013, 07:46 PM
After probably the 137th time I was asked if I wanted to see someone's penis:

Me: "I know what a penis looks like, and I have access to one that's probably bigger than yours."

35290

islandsoutherngirl
11-01-2013, 01:40 PM
I love when a guy says "wow thats expensive" "your prices are way too high" etc, and then I get taken private before I can even reply to him. Guess my prices aren't too high for other guys! Ha!

I always love that one

PinkGeisha
11-07-2013, 12:20 PM
So this wasn't whilst camming, but on my "Vanilla" Facebook... I have a vanilla friend (VF) that doesn't know that I cam, but posted a FB post on his wall asking if anyone knew anything about webcams and streaming on a mac. Being the idiot that I am, I blabbered, "Logitech C920 + Adobe Encoder", and we started talking. Our Facebook chat went a little something like this:

Me: Yeah, if it comes down to it, you can buy my C920 from me, I'm looking to eventually upgrade my camera.
VF: More expensive than C920? Are you looking for production grade cams to shoot film...?!?!
Me: Oh, nah, just a camera that has zoom, pan, and tilt.... WITH A REMOTE!
VF: Ahh, I see, you're a performer!

::This is where I almost choke on my water I was sipping on, like ohshitohshitohshit... I don't need this cute guy I just met to know that, especially since I wanna get into his pants... hold up, wait a second, he doesn't know shit... don't have geo-blocking on, and a shit ton of my custies come from my neighborhood, but not a single fuckin one is a "friend" in real life... LA is too big, shoot.... Damn! Dirty bastard! I wonder how much porn he watches to know that the pro PRO camgirls use those types of cameras... you dirty bastard!!!!::

And then I calmly and nochantly reply....

Me: Hmm? Performer? Wait, what's that?!?! Did I miss something....?!?!
VF: ..... You're more innocent than I thought!


HA! If you only knew! XD
35391

AlexisCam
11-07-2013, 01:51 PM
Tits?
Yes I have two tits.

What does your ass look like?
2 cheeks and a crack.

AmethystLily
11-11-2013, 01:07 AM
Whenever someone orders me to stand/show my feet, I've started saying that I've cut off my legs/feet, even if I was standing, moving around, or had my feet in view of the camera.

AmethystLily
11-11-2013, 09:02 PM
This could have easily been a "stupid annoying thing," if not for the "Brina's Magic App." Along with blocking two spellings of a nickname that makes me want to reach through the user's computer and strangle them for using it, I put another spelling people have tried with me into the aforementioned bot, and the a conversation from tonight went like this:

Ihavejustbeenpwned: Hi, I'm a stupid moron with nothing relevant to say. Are you shaved or hairy?"
Me: "I see that you're a moron." *ban*

MissMorvahna
11-12-2013, 12:30 PM
douche- get up
me- what do you mean get up? i am up! I'm wide awake right now!


douche- how big is the biggest dick you've sucked? I wanna see you suck a white cock. how big is the biggest dicked friend u got? (okay what?)
me- not sure. I have the biggest cock of all of them. wanna choke on my big white cock bb? *douche leaves*


douche- bb do you do karate? what kinda of holds can you do on me? tell me about them.
me- seems like you'd be getting off on that. i don't give away free boners.
douche- what holds can you do? tell me. plzzzzz bb.
me- okay you wanna know a hold i can do?
douche- ???
me- its called the block and kick out of my room hold! *kicks douche out* FATALITY Angelina wins!

Vlodina
11-12-2013, 01:54 PM
"What are you working with bb?"

Me: Clearly I'm working with cheap freeloaders today.

;)

Camigirl
11-12-2013, 02:39 PM
I love them all!
I thought of two that bother the hell out of me and I always say this back.

Him: Show me your tits and ass baby
Me: Huh? I signed up with a dating site, this is a dating site isn't it?

OMG they look so confused and try to explain to ME I am not on porn site. My regulars laugh.

Oh this too
Him: Why don't you get a real job?
Me: Do I bother you when you are mopping floors at Burger King?

LOL There are more but I can't remember right off.

islandsoutherngirl
11-12-2013, 06:55 PM
I love them all!
I thought of two that bother the hell out of me and I always say this back.

Him: Show me your tits and ass baby
Me: Huh? I signed up with a dating site, this is a dating site isn't it?


OMG they look so confused and try to explain to ME I am not on porn site. My regulars laugh.

Oh this too
Him: Why don't you get a real job?
Me: Do I bother you when you are mopping floors at Burger King?

LOL There are more but I can't remember right off.

Hilarious!!!!

RubyTheSexPixie
11-12-2013, 07:20 PM
A guy on Mgf messaged me and asked if I was wearing the outfit in my profile pic when I said I wasn't he said it was deceiving him. His profile picture was a cartoon dog so I asked him if he was a cartoon dog right now. He said yes all the time, I still closed the chat though. And I crack myself up.

audritwo
11-12-2013, 08:09 PM
Some guy was swearing up and down today in SM that he had a 12.5 inch cock.
It's not everyday you see one of those. Asked him to send me a picture to prove it. I reminded him I'm gonna do a reverse image search on it as well.
This fool sent me a photo with a FUCKING WATERMARK across it. Sure enough there was thousands of hits on the Googles.
I was in no mood and quite bored.... Called him out on it.

"BB, that is me! The internet just loves me."
"I happen to be on the internet, and I think you are a dirty liar."
"BB, you can trust me!"
"Yeah because no one the internet ever lies... like my age."
BANS

SluttyLittlePrincess
11-13-2013, 11:52 AM
omg I'm totally using this one, I get guys going on allll the time, where are you from, then I say london, oh here abouts in london, then i say east, oh I'm in east to, gaaaah FUC9 OFF2 lool

sophiesecrets
11-13-2013, 12:20 PM
Oh this too
Him: Why don't you get a real job?
Me: Do I bother you when you are mopping floors at Burger King?

LOL There are more but I can't remember right off.

ha ha, im so guna use that!

Rina
11-13-2013, 06:32 PM
douche- get up
me- what do you mean get up? i am up! I'm wide awake right now!


douche- how big is the biggest dick you've sucked? I wanna see you suck a white cock. how big is the biggest dicked friend u got? (okay what?)
me- not sure. I have the biggest cock of all of them. wanna choke on my big white cock bb? *douche leaves*


douche- bb do you do karate? what kinda of holds can you do on me? tell me about them.
me- seems like you'd be getting off on that. i don't give away free boners.
douche- what holds can you do? tell me. plzzzzz bb.
me- okay you wanna know a hold i can do?
douche- ???
me- its called the block and kick out of my room hold! *kicks douche out* FATALITY Angelina wins!
35466

VictoriaChaos
11-19-2013, 12:26 PM
NoCreditCardLand: Will you flash me?

Me: Yeah, for five gold.

NoCreditCardLand: Will you do it because I'm funny?

Me: Last time I checked my electric company didn't take funny as payment.

AwesomeGuyWithMoney: That's funny, I actually work at the electric company.

Me: Oh really? Do tell me, do you guys take funny as payment?

AwesomeGuyWithMoney: NOPE

Me: How about compliments? Do you take compliments as payment?

AwesomeGuyWithMoney: Can't say we do.

Me: Alright, guys it's just been confirmed, they don't take funny or compliments as payment! Hear that guys? I can't pay my bills with funny!

Then AwesomeGuyWithMoney takes me for a long exclusive.

#WINNING!

Busygirl
11-19-2013, 12:43 PM
(I'm showing on cam my big stash of dildos and toys laid out neatly for cam shows.)
Member: What are you using for DP?
Me: Carrots! (rolls eyes)

VictoriaChaos
11-24-2013, 04:24 PM
FeedingYouLines: What city do you live in?

Me: I live in Washington State, you don't need to know what city I live in.

FeedingYouLines: Fuck you ass hole

Me: I do and I get paid for it. *Wink && block*

VictoriaChaos
11-27-2013, 09:19 AM
Edited so others don't get in trouble.

Snowy0Star
11-27-2013, 11:07 AM
^ arent we weren't supposed to not tell them how much we get and if they find out were telling the viewers we can get in trouble with SM?

VictoriaChaos
11-27-2013, 12:13 PM
^ arent we weren't supposed to not tell them how much we get and if they find out were telling the viewers we can get in trouble with SM?

Where did you get that information?

laurielegs
11-27-2013, 12:27 PM
Where did you get that information?

Snowy is correct. I believe it's in the rules somewhere and also in gold shows and in our room topics we are never supposed to mention a dollar amount or percentages we get.

I do sometimes tell them to keep in mind that the site takes most of the money and that I only get a "small percentage" without mentioning numbers.