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View Full Version : How far into a relationship do you tell someone you're camming?



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anonymous camgirl
04-21-2012, 05:47 PM
I agree that is EXACTLY what happens to me.. and it really doesn't matter how much of a good boy he is with women.. soon as he gets wind of you and your job.. you are his dream fuck girl.. cuz the other women he respects, and he doesn't have to respect you.. Men automatically think just because you do this sorta job you don't respect yourself and you are open for business 24/7 like 7 eleven.


My problem with telling men upfront about my job is that they immediately think that I am fuckable. Even when I have told them that I was an online Domme. No mention of porn. Or I have told guys I was into BDSM (no mention of my job) they think I am fuckable. I can't win with upfront disclosure - so until I am semi-serious with someone again, then I will drop the "bomb" - because I am soooo tired of dealing with:

"Send me your dirtiest picture." "Come over to my place." "So...your DTF yeah??" Or that they want to talk about my job non-stop.

It feels like camming except I'm not getting paid!

sexysusie
04-21-2012, 07:26 PM
Fortunately i was with my OH when i first discovered the world of camming, and he is the only person who knows what i do! So I don't have that issue. However, if we ever broke up, I'm just about certain i wouldn't even try to date, too much hassle. There's no way i would tell anyone new what i do, no way in hell, not even if it freezes over!! If it got to the stage we were considering moving in together (for reasons other than purely economical), I'd re-assess the situation. Good luck x

HaydenBlue
04-21-2012, 07:55 PM
I agree that is EXACTLY what happens to me.. and it really doesn't matter how much of a good boy he is with women.. soon as he gets wind of you and your job.. you are his dream fuck girl.. cuz the other women he respects, and he doesn't have to respect you.. Men automatically think just because you do this sorta job you don't respect yourself and you are open for business 24/7 like 7 eleven.

Ding ding ding!

Sorry, but like 98% percent of the guys you tell that you do camming upfront you (normally) will get throw into the "slutty/hoe/fuckable" category - no matter how you dress/act, etc. By telling them that upfront, when they know 0% else about you - you have given them a mental 'green light!'

First impressions are important. If a stranger walks up to you and says, "Hi, I'm Joe. I've been in jail for robbing a bank at gunpoint." You think, ' Whoa, joe is a bank robber - he's bad news ' And you generally want to avoid Joe.

You go up to a strange guy and say "Hi I'm Hayden! I do online porn as my job' - Guys go 'Hey, she gets PAID to do porn. Maybe I should fuck her. Or offer her $20 then fuck her.' They don't go, 'Hey cool, wow. Nice job, please let me take you out for coffee.'

The only person I've told, pretty much up front - and who accepted it without questions and sexual advances was a guy who was looking to already go into Kink.com work himself.

Regular, 'off-the-street' joe-schome all wanted some pussy.

Until it gets to the point where I think we're getting serious - I don't feel the need to tell a guy if we're just going to go out to coffee. There is such a thing as 'too much - too soon' and I think this job falls into that category.

TracyBlade
04-21-2012, 08:25 PM
Ladies, let's be honest. No matter what most guys say, even before you tell them about your job, pussy is the top priority yes??? LOL Seriously. At least 80% if not more are looking to get LAID. You telling them you're a cam girl just gives them the idea they can be more open and honest with you. They think oh ok, maybe I can just let this one know my true intentions lol. Honest guys with "good" intentions are a rare find these days. Oh and there are always those who claim they want yada yada but just want....drum roll...PUSSY lol. I don't think it matters wtf your job is.Men want pussy. LOL. And when you find a guy that actually breaks out of this mold, you're lucky ;)

anonymous camgirl
04-22-2012, 06:41 AM
thanks!! I was going to comment about this. .. Now i don't have to.. you said it better than I would have! OMG and I used to sell insurance, underwrite and do claims.. NEVER EVER did anything in the adult industry whatsoever.. and I was treated as if i did.. So yea!! what she says totally. I felt like a whore before I even was one (not that I am .. thats just what THEY Think).. which actually spurred me to pursue this industry.. I thought well if that's what they wanna think I should capitalize on it.. FOR REAL! I could tell you so many stories of how men took advantage of me.. and then after I confronted them and how i feel about that. Sorry!! I am usually a good boy.. I don't do this to other women .. basically telling me (JUST YOU) so why am i the lucky one to get the wrath of their penis? and the funny thing is.. I don't even want sex at all.. I could care less.. I am so disgusted with the way men behave in real life.. No better than they do on cam that's for sure.. that I lost my libido and don't care if i ever get it back.. sad but true but I think i finally gave up on men.. I am going to be celebrating my 40th birthday and been banging my head against the wall since i was 27 looking for a good man.. never found one.


Ladies, let's be honest. No matter what most guys say, even before you tell them about your job, pussy is the top priority yes??? LOL Seriously. At least 80% if not more are looking to get LAID. You telling them you're a cam girl just gives them the idea they can be more open and honest with you. They think oh ok, maybe I can just let this one know my true intentions lol. Honest guys with "good" intentions are a rare find these days. Oh and there are always those who claim they want yada yada but just want....drum roll...PUSSY lol. I don't think it matters wtf your job is.Men want pussy. LOL. And when you find a guy that actually breaks out of this mold, you're lucky ;)

TracyBlade
04-23-2012, 12:06 AM
I'll also be the first to admit that I find sex fun, and if that makes me "slutty" go fuck yourself I don't care! LOL

moonjade6
04-25-2012, 07:55 AM
Just another update, as it turns out he was a selfish piece of shit who was leading me on.

I noticed that, instead of the "relationship" naturally progressing, he was showing me less and less affection. On my side, I was doing most of the work: inviting him over for dinner several nights a week, making sure I looked nice and WASTING all of my makeup and perfume on him >:(

When I pressed him, he finally admitted to me that he wasn't physically attracted to me, and that he knew that early on but we were having such a lovely time that he didn't think it was important to tell me. Instead, he reassured me that he was attracted to me, that he thought I was "perfect", and that he knew sex would happen at the right time, etc. He claimed that me camming had nothing to do with how he felt. I'm not sure if I agree or not, but does it matter? He knew what my intentions were, he knew that I liked him and that if he told me from the beginning that he was seeking friendship, I wouldn't have fed the bastard. He was getting something out of it; he was using me for my awesome cooking.

I can only imagine what life would have been like for me if I moved in with him without knowing this...disastrous. He was probably looking for a maid that would also help him out with rent! Be careful of con artists ladies :( He was a great deceiver, nothing more.

anonymous camgirl
04-25-2012, 08:08 AM
I am sorry honey.. this is more often than not the usual case of what goes on in a man's mind. That's why i have spent most of the last 12 yrs not giving men much.. to see if they really want me.. and to cook for them...uh NO.. you better cook a whole lot for me first before I ever step foot in the kitchen.. I had a boyfriend ... who cooked and cleaned.. I always bragged about how I was such a great cook but never made him anything.. It was almost a year later before i ever cooked him anything.. He thought i couldnt cook and he said my cooking was better than his dad's gourmet cookery...lol... and I said YEA!! that's what I wanted you to think because I didn't want you to expect me to do things for you.. and take me for granted.. Men do that you know!! get used to it... My favorite saying in regards to men.. and this works everywhere, Online or offline

' GIVE A MAN AN INCH, AND HE'LL TAKE A MILE" just remember that phrase next time and you'll be fine.


Just another update, as it turns out he was a selfish piece of shit who was leading me on.

I noticed that, instead of the "relationship" naturally progressing, he was showing me less and less affection. On my side, I was doing most of the work: inviting him over for dinner several nights a week, making sure I looked nice and WASTING all of my makeup and perfume on him >:(

When I pressed him, he finally admitted to me that he wasn't physically attracted to me, and that he knew that early on but we were having such a lovely time that he didn't think it was important to tell me. Instead, he reassured me that he was attracted to me, that he thought I was "perfect", and that he knew sex would happen at the right time, etc. He claimed that me camming had nothing to do with how he felt. I'm not sure if I agree or not, but does it matter? He knew what my intentions were, he knew that I liked him and that if he told me from the beginning that he was seeking friendship, I wouldn't have fed the bastard. He was getting something out of it; he was using me for my awesome cooking.

I can only imagine what life would have been like for me if I moved in with him without knowing this...disastrous. He was probably looking for a maid that would also help him out with rent! Be careful of con artists ladies :( He was a great deceiver, nothing more.

domino.damoiselle
04-25-2012, 10:09 AM
I'm always honest about what I do from the start. I don't want to start dating someone and find that I really like them and then have them run screaming when I tell them I dance and cam. If it bothers them, chances are they probably aren't someone I'd want to seriously date anyway. If they're ok with it, chances are they're not the possessive or jealous type, which is what I'm looking for. But yeah, I do think that being so honest about the job does make some guys think you're easy. It's just a matter of weeding out the douchebags, like anything.