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miamia4me
05-15-2012, 07:47 AM
I still find it surprising how easily people are offended on the internet especially in the camming biz.

Rina
05-15-2012, 08:30 AM
You're in the minority. Some women absolutely CAN orgasm vaginally but the huge misconception is that ALL women can "learn" to do it. That's simply not true. Some will never ever be able to no matter what they 'try'. It's just in the plumbing.

I am aware that I am in the minority as I spent a good portion of my college years being told what I was experiencing was impossible. So for me the huge misconception was that you can't. I have never thought a woman could learn to do it and it wasn't implied in anything that I wrote.

I was in no way saying that other women should do what I do. I think both misconceptions are equally huge, but depending on where you are you only see one side of it.

I think it's rather pointless to to say one misconception is more prevalent than the other, because they both end up invalidating people's experiences.

Aurora_Sunset
05-15-2012, 10:15 AM
I'm personally on the side of the fence where I have never been able to orgasm vaginally, and have always been told by everyone I talk to about it that I can "learn." I don't even think I've encountered anyone who tried to seriously tell me that vaginal orgasms are a myth :O - it seems so silly that anyone would think that. But that's been covered, so I'll just focus on the myth on the other side.

I hate it when people (guys mostly) assume that ALL women can orgasm from pounding away at their pussies with absolutely no clitoral stimulation. Can't even recall the number of guys I've slept with who, once they realized I wasn't gonna cum from insertion, proceeded to tell me "Well, every other girl I've been with could - and she could cum multiple times with me barely touching her!" I will admit those are times where I've snapped back "She was probably faking it." They could have been, they may not have been, I'll never know - I never met them. It's also possible the guy's statement isn't even true and they're just trying to save their poor, bruised little egos from feeling emasculated that they couldn't "make" me cum. (And my statement is mostly just me saving face from being made to feel "broken").

I have no doubts that vaginal orgasms exist, but I hate being made to feel like I'm "defunct" by the number of guys out there who think that every woman can cum at the mere touch of their cock to a pussy. Or who then turn into scientists and tell me to go home and practice, because "all women can learn." Thanks, jackass. I've tried, multiple times, multiple techniques. Shit just doesn't do it for me. I do get envious of the girls who can have orgasms that way, but overall, what should it matter as long as I know what feels good to me? It breaks my heart (and enrages me a little) every time I hear a woman say she fakes it because she feels like she "should" be able to orgasm that way and doesn't want to make her guy feel bad... How will they ever learn "different strokes for different folks" if some women are faking all the time instead of learning their own bodies and accepting the different ways it brings them pleasure? :(

vanillamist
05-15-2012, 10:29 AM
I've heard this too. I think they're assuming a light pink labia is more innocent and youthful while darker tones are from years of promiscuity.

Sociologically people are trained to associate "dark" with "bad". It's a racially driven thing too. Women with dark labia tend to be darker skinned, and because they're not white they must be lacking morals and total dirty whores!

It's probably not an EXPLICIT thought process but there's no denying that people are trained to associate traits with race, and it disgusts me.

ClaudiaReina
05-15-2012, 10:49 AM
What a good thread!
First of all I wanted to recommend a great book on anal sex: Tristan Taormino The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women. It helped me a lot to understand and practice anal sex better:) I don't offer it on cam yet but I'm thinking about it. I need time warming up and that isn't a short time and I'm not sure guys would wait for it. When I escorted I found out the hard way that at least 80% of the guys think that an unlubricated finger up the bum with the speed of light is the ultimate pleasure for women and I had partners in RL who had to be taught that it's not like in the movies, you can't start it like that, I need time, patience, LOTS of lube, and THEN you can do your thing. In my experience women need a bit more warming up than men when it comes to anal (passive) (or I met with girls who like to take it slow and men who want it right now and enjoy it from minute 1, idk).

I don't squirt on cam because it's not in direct correlation with orgasm for me. When it happens, it happens way before that and I have to be really aroused. I don't want to fake it, no offense to those who do, it's just my preference.

As far as I know, you don't end up in diapers from anal sex but if someone had different experiences, I can believe that too. We're all different.:)

MissSeraphim
05-15-2012, 11:57 AM
Anal sex always does the opposite for me...nothing bigger than a fart is getting out of there for a day or two lol TMI my bad.
This is why I up my price for anal. It's private only and they need to tip a certain amount once in private for me to do it.
Yeah my squirting is in no way sign of an orgasm..just that I'm getting into it and hitting the right spot.

I've been having sex about 6 years now and honestly only one guy has made me orgasm vaginally and made me squirt..he's my babydaddy lol and even with him it was a here and there thing. It's soo much easier to do on your own.

On the note of stretching vaginas...I've had two kids within one year all naturally. No drugs, cutting, etc. my pussy is still as tight. It looks a bit longer from my second splitting it a bit (try all the way to my urethra >.>) but it's really not a huge difference since it's had time to heal.
Vaginas are meant to do amazing things and they do it well.

I heard someone saying once that every time a girl sleeps with a guy there is a permanent indentation in her vagina from him. ... WTF??
I was like wait what? That makes no sense

prettygreeneyes
05-15-2012, 10:28 PM
Wow, this statement doesn't support deeply racist beliefs at all. ::)

(not directed at you, prettygreeneyes. :) )


Sociologically people are trained to associate "dark" with "bad". It's a racially driven thing too. Women with dark labia tend to be darker skinned, and because they're not white they must be lacking morals and total dirty whores!

It's probably not an EXPLICIT thought process but there's no denying that people are trained to associate traits with race, and it disgusts me.

Yeah I guess that's where the belief comes from. I would love to hear someone who believes this try to explain themselves because there is absolutely no fact to back it up, just racist rhetoric. Ugh, so messed up :(

TeenageAnnie
05-16-2012, 06:57 AM
i dont care if it is real or not. i cannot do it. and therefore it is good for MY business that I tell guys its fake. so I will continue to tell guys them other girls are just peeing... Because I am a business woman. End of story.

TheBrownFox
05-16-2012, 07:14 AM
i dont care if it is real or not. i cannot do it. and therefore it is good for MY business that I tell guys its fake. so I will continue to tell guys them other girls are just peeing... Because I am a business woman. End of story.




Yeah, if a guy comes into my chat and tries to make me feel bad for NOT being able to squirt (*rolls eyes*), I'm probably gonna be like "Um...you DO know half the time they're just peeing, right?" LOL. I don't put any models on blast or anything like that. But if a guy is gonna act all stupid, assuming that ALL cam girls must have the same abilities, I'm gonna set him straight. Don't be in my room tryna give me grief just 'cuz I can't squirt all over the camera like Jada Fire does (check out the 'Talk about a happy birthday' video on YouPorn). :P

Oh, and them assuming that we're always wet...lol. Are you wet, baby?" :P

Sorry, I know it's supposed to be a thread about misconceptions women have.

vanillamist
05-16-2012, 10:03 AM
i dont care if it is real or not. i cannot do it. and therefore it is good for MY business that I tell guys its fake. so I will continue to tell guys them other girls are just peeing... Because I am a business woman. End of story.


Especially considering there are MULTIPLE threads on this board all about how to "squirt" simply by peeing. These so called "squirters" are 100% giving tips on how to "pee clear". I know some women TRULY CAN squirt, but I don't believe for one second that the cam girls who claim to "squirt" are in the majority. It's definitely a majority of urine.

MissSeraphim
05-16-2012, 11:07 AM
i dont care if it is real or not. i cannot do it. and therefore it is good for MY business that I tell guys its fake. so I will continue to tell guys them other girls are just peeing... Because I am a business woman. End of story.

Spreading ignorance. Thanks so much!
I'd probably be more bothered if guys actually listened..
If I were in your position I'd watch how I worded it. Tell them it's flat out fake is well dumb seeing as if they ask about it they believe it is real. How many times have people said god is fake yet people believe?
(Yes, I just compared squirting to god...so sue me :P it was the first thing I thought of)
As myself, I'd say something about how a lot of girls fake it, not that it's just flat out fake.
All I think of is just one guy believes you then sleeps with a girl and manages to make her squirt then he goes, "You nasty ho you peed on me!"Now you were just indirectly responsible for mortifying some poor girl.
Maybe I just care to much about the truth and other humans.
And just a side note about the business aspect...if you sold product A which is similar to product B but your product lacks a function product B has and you were lieing to people telling them that the function is just propaganda. When enough people find out you're a liar, it will probably be bad for business.

TeenageAnnie
05-16-2012, 11:14 AM
I think I worded it wrong.. what I meant was I tell guys its "faked on webcam" not that it isn't possible. Having been a sales woman before camming I know all about how to convince guys my stuff is better than what other girl is selling, and I don't really care if I am spreading ignorance or whatever because there are things I do that are completely fake. And guys who pay for webcam girls are stupid and ignorant in the first place, but what do I care as long as my kids are fed. So what I am saying is.. so what if you saw a girl in HER OWN ROOM telling HER CUSTOMERS things YOU dont believe, it's her room, it's her customers get over it.

Rina
05-16-2012, 11:37 AM
. . .

TeenageAnnie
05-16-2012, 11:40 AM
. . .

I'm sure even the people who serve you food at the restaurant every week don't think much nice of you either, welcome to the world of retail.

Rina
05-16-2012, 12:22 PM
I'm sure even the people who serve you food at the restaurant every week don't think much nice of you either, welcome to the world of retail.

I've worked retail, and I just never held a particular disdain for my customers as a whole. To each their own. It's not worth derailing the thread over.

MissSeraphim
05-16-2012, 12:44 PM
Ok you worded it wrong and that was basically my point.
If I saw a girl in HER room telling HER customers that I probably wouldn't do anything but snicker and think she's ignorant as well.

ANYWHO
on the misconception that girls with darker vaginas are whores..
I just read a random fact that more masturbation makes a mans penis darker. Maybe this has correlation to that?

Vlodina
05-16-2012, 12:49 PM
ANYWHO
on the misconception that girls with darker vaginas are whores..
I just read a random fact that more masturbation makes a mans penis darker. Maybe this has correlation to that?

Lol! Maybe the constant friction causes scar tissue. Joking here...

cvarga
05-16-2012, 12:57 PM
Erm.....

I'm going to take this one piece by piece....

"Fisting WILL TEAR the area between vagina and anus". Not if done properly. ANYTHING can tear this skin if it is rammed in improperly - most rape victims end up with some tearing because the area is not relaxed or lubed, but no one would suggest that a penis WILL rip that skin.

And when you do tear, you do not change the SHAPE of your vagina. IN fact, you grow scar tissue (same as when you rip any other part of your body/skin). Scar tissue is far less flexible than normal tissue, so there is actually LESS give after small tears. Really huge tears (such as many women experience during childbirth, often being CUT open by the doctor/midwife) have a bigger impact, but you wouldn't do this kind of tearing with a toy/fist. You would have to be seriously high to keep going with something that started to tear, because it HURTS. Its not like you suddenly look down after a fisting session and go "oh heeey...look at that! I managed to tear myself open from my v to my a without even noticing!".

"There is definitely no exercise for the rectum". Again...uuuum....the rectum is a sphincter, i.e., a muscle that is designed to expand and contract. You CAN do exercises similar to keigels - you just clench and relax the muscle, just like you do when working on your vagina. Obviously, there is only so much that this can do, but you CAN do them.

"As we age we lose muscle". As we age, it is definitely harder to maintain muscle, in the same way that it is harder to lose weight after hormonal changes from menopause. However, I would love to refer you to all those ageing bodybuilders and athletes....they may have slightly less muscle than they used to, and it is probably much harder for them to maintain it, but its not like suddenly all your muscles start to dissolve in your body. You can maintain them up to a very, very old age - its just harder. And at the age where you start to lose all muscle tone, it goes whether you stuck a bottle of cola up there or not - go chat to all the old geezers in nursing homes wearing diapers - see if they ALL had some extreme insertion fun!

I second Hyaden's comments on variances in size of vagina - and would like to add that differences in bone structure (how far apart your hips are) and internal arrangement (tilted cervix etc) can make a difference too.

On top of that - we all have different rates of healing, skin flexibility, etc etc.

The things that you describe are definitely POSSIBLE - of course! Absolutely! But they are not definite, not forgone conclusions. Every woman who fists is NOT going to start prolapsing all over the place.

Again - to refer to Hayden's post - women are BUILT to have their uterus and vagina stretched out!! We are supposed to push CHILDREN through there for christ's sake!! And it was only fairly recently that women stopped popping out kids as fast as they could - it used to be the case that you would be popping one out a year....but women were not having hysterectomies left right and centre! Lets not forget what we evolved to do here ladies - do it right, and you are not going to have your uterus drop out because of insertion.

I haven't read all of the posts but to my knowledge no one has questioned the ability for the vaginal canal to expand. The vaginal canal expands to push out and down, not up or sideways. What I am referring to is the high risk for damage to the cervix, the cervix ligaments and the uterus. Damage to these areas leads to uncorrectable weakening that leads to prolapse. Also unmentioned is that many women are unaware of uterine fibroids and cysts they may have. This isn't a human anatomy class so I'll leave it with this; once you start opening or dislodging these into the uterus it becomes dangerous (Google is your friend).

On top of this, when you start placing items so high up (as mentioned with the bed post) not only are you risking damage to the above mentioned but you are also introducing bacterial, fungal or viral organisms into the the uterus which often goes unnoticed until well after PID has rendered you infertile. I would never say it happens to everyone, what I am saying is the risk for damage is so high that one who does these should have a very good relationship with their gynecologist because at some point you have to consider the weight of a dollar to your health.

The rectum is not a sphincter. It is a tube between two sphincters that expands to collect fecal material. Once it expands enough we get the signal to defecate. If this muscle is weakened you will get that signal but because you have lost peristaltic movement the only thing the rectum can do is continue to expand, creating an impaction. Those waves can't move the fecal matter downward if they are stretched beyond the point the original signal is set off. Also, regarding the sphincter which leads to the actual colon, if this is damaged, (in the same way the cervix ligament and cervix may be damaged), the procedure used to correct it is called a colostomy.

If anyone is considering doing these kinds of shows I strongly recommend you have regular check ups because as stated, IMHO, the risks of destroying your body is something to take into consideration. You MUST be educated on what your body can handle, this risks, the signs and symptoms and the treatments.

And just a short note about tearing. Yes, this is something that happens over time. It does lead to scarring. Ask yourself this, whats more appealing? The soft environment or the scarred, enlarged environment. This is part of the reason women who have given birth sometimes feel bad about themselves, unreasonably so, it's a natural part of life, but yeah. The difference though is after giving birth this cut is tended to by medical professionals after being repaired. If you are at home alone using toys it's not the same. Neither is the tearing.

There are so many things to consider. Just be smart about what you are doing, be informed and have good relationships with your care providers.

I forgot something I wanted to say so I'm editing it in after post but please also remember that not everyone is well informed, some people may be in denial and others don't always tell the truth. Just because someone SAYS their body can handle it doesn't not make it true. It's an exception and not a rule. Also remember it's not our business to pry, to assume or to believe it is OK for US simply because someone says it's OK, it's safe, the body can handle it or whatever statement they may make. Only individuals know their own truths and it's not without medical supervision and due care that actually makes it true.

Incantatious
05-16-2012, 08:05 PM
Spreading ignorance. Thanks so much!
]I'd probably be more bothered if guys actually listened..
If I were in your position I'd watch how I worded it. Tell them it's flat out fake is well dumb seeing as if they ask about it they believe it is real. How many times have people said god is fake yet people believe?
(Yes, I just compared squirting to god...so sue me :P it was the first thing I thought of)
As myself, I'd say something about how a lot of girls fake it, not that it's just flat out fake.
All I think of is just one guy believes you then sleeps with a girl and manages to make her squirt then he goes, "You nasty ho you peed on me!"Now you were just indirectly responsible for mortifying some poor girl.
Maybe I just care to much about the truth and other humans.
And just a side note about the business aspect...if you sold product A which is similar to product B but your product lacks a function product B has and you were lieing to people telling them that the function is just propaganda. When enough people find out you're a liar, it will probably be bad for business.

She doesn't have a responsibility to spread knowledge. Nor is she in any way responsible for other people's personal sexual experiences. She has a responsibility to keep guys in her room and keeping paid traffic.
This definitely isn't the kind of job which gets you fired if you lie about something unless you disobey your contract. Even if people "find out she's a liar!", which they probably won't even bother giving a crap about, if she is raking traffic in, it won't matter to her business one bit.

sammii
05-16-2012, 08:36 PM
All I think of is just one guy believes you then sleeps with a girl and manages to make her squirt then he goes, "You nasty ho you peed on me!"Now you were just indirectly responsible for mortifying some poor girl.

LOL!! Are you for real?

PrincessLuna
05-16-2012, 08:47 PM
LOL!! Are you for real?

I've watched a documentary where this happened to a couple. They had to seek medical help because they thought she wasn't able to control her bladder. Turns out they were just awesome in bed together.

Incantatious
05-16-2012, 08:56 PM
I've watched a documentary where this happened to a couple. They had to seek medical help because they thought she wasn't able to control her bladder. Turns out they were just awesome in bed together.

What, the guy once asked a camgirl to squirt, camgirl told him it was fake / dirty pee, he believed her, he got with a girl, she naturally squirted, he thought it was dirty pee because of Camgirl, they sought medical help, turned up in a documentary and lived happily ever after? ;D

PrincessLuna
05-16-2012, 09:04 PM
What, the guy once asked a camgirl to squirt, camgirl told him it was fake / dirty pee, he believed her, he got with a girl, she naturally squirted, he thought it was dirty pee because of Camgirl, they sought medical help, turned up in a documentary and lived happily ever after? ;D

Haha that wouldn't surprise me! It was a medical show (not documentary) about women and odd sexual health problems. The first one she squirted and they thought she peed, later in the show there was one who really DID pee during sex. If I remember correctly the walls of her vagina had collapsed and caused some sort of sudden problem during sex. She had to have the walls surgically reattached and they went about their humping ways.

It was actually a really good show, I wish I could remember the name of it. I didn't get to watch too much of it because I saw it at my mom's house and watching medical shows about sex freaks her out (but sex scenes in movies don't, go figure lol)

ManyRoses
05-16-2012, 10:59 PM
LOL!! Are you for real?

May I direct you to my original post...this happens A LOT!! It is easy for us to forget, because we work in the sex industry, that the vast majority of people are very ignorant about a LOT of sexual things - fetishes, biology...you name it!! I can't count the number of "vanilla" people that I talk about my job to (apologies for grammar!) who are SHOCKED that people have foot fetishes....which is something that none of us would ever blink at!

I think that there are better ways to be a business woman and sell yourself to your customers than to make a blanket statement that can do real damage. For example, there is nothing wrong with saying "lots of the girls that squirt aren't actually cumming - they have just trained themselves to squirt on demand! But I actually cum for you - wouldn't you rather see me REAL orgasm?" etc etc etc.

ManyRoses
05-16-2012, 11:02 PM
Haha that wouldn't surprise me! It was a medical show (not documentary) about women and odd sexual health problems. The first one she squirted and they thought she peed, later in the show there was one who really DID pee during sex. If I remember correctly the walls of her vagina had collapsed and caused some sort of sudden problem during sex. She had to have the walls surgically reattached and they went about their humping ways.

It was actually a really good show, I wish I could remember the name of it. I didn't get to watch too much of it because I saw it at my mom's house and watching medical shows about sex freaks her out (but sex scenes in movies don't, go figure lol)

Interesting....I wish you could remember the name too!!

Especially interesting because of the woman who had to have a surgical intervention, when I am assuming that she hasn't been doing anything out of the ordinary! Goes to show - it is all about the individual body - some women can handle more or different things than others can, and it doesn't mean that one thing will necessarily be damaging to everyone...

Charlotteslut
05-17-2012, 01:31 AM
One misconception I think often hear is that fisting/large toys are fine because women give birth. I think this is a rather poor argument because women can and do tear during childbirth and lots of time/lubrication/hormones are involved in the birthing process.

I think we should stress instead that the vagina is elastic and you can't be "ruined" by a fist (lol @ the idea that being ruined is equated with tightness) because the vagina expands and contracts naturally.

Another misconception I hear from women (although not exclusive to women) is that losing your virginity= the hymen being broken by a penis, or that sex=penetration. Heteronormative much? :D

PrincessLuna
05-17-2012, 10:29 AM
when I am assuming that she hasn't been doing anything out of the ordinary! Goes to show - it is all about the individual body

She birthed a few kids and had a vigorous sex life. The walls can become detached after child birth, add on to the fact that she was overly active (they were boys) and her healthy sex life, they just kinda... fell down lol. She was fine though, it wasn't a prolapse, they just gave her vaginal implants and she went on her merry fucking (literally) way.

PrincessLuna
05-17-2012, 10:35 AM
I really wish I could find the show. But when I google it, it just gives me sites selling sex aids and Dr. Quinn episodes :D

ManyRoses
05-17-2012, 12:50 PM
She birthed a few kids and had a vigorous sex life. The walls can become detached after child birth, add on to the fact that she was overly active (they were boys) and her healthy sex life, they just kinda... fell down lol. She was fine though, it wasn't a prolapse, they just gave her vaginal implants and she went on her merry fucking (literally) way.

Well, depending on what we mean by "vigorous"....I would consider that pretty ordinary! Woman pops out a couple kids and has a bunch of sex...how strange!! LOL

ManyRoses
05-17-2012, 12:54 PM
Another misconception I hear from women (although not exclusive to women) is that losing your virginity= the hymen being broken by a penis, or that sex=penetration. Heteronormative much? :D

THIS!!! And not just women...

I remember in high school, there were a few kids in particular that were "waiting until marriage to have sex"....but in the meantime, engaged in seriously heavy petting, including some boob-sucking, ass grabbing etc...as well as oral sex, and in one case, even anal!!!

Um...its called oral "sex" for a reason kids...

There was one guy who was "saving his first kiss for his wife" but had no problems getting his dick sucked...which was actually almost impressive! That man is a helluva salesman, convincing a girl to suck his dick without kissing her...

Jessica1001
05-17-2012, 08:10 PM
She birthed a few kids and had a vigorous sex life. The walls can become detached after child birth, add on to the fact that she was overly active (they were boys) and her healthy sex life, they just kinda... fell down lol. She was fine though, it wasn't a prolapse, they just gave her vaginal implants and she went on her merry fucking (literally) way.

What's a vaginal implant? Any relation to a pessary?

Thx.

PrincessLuna
05-18-2012, 09:46 AM
Yeah, that sounds about right. It was just something inserted in to help reattach her vaginal walls to prevent future prolapse. Like I said, I don't really remember the episode too terrible well.