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roast
09-01-2012, 11:16 AM
OP, my opinion on this has already been expressed but I wanted to throw out that kinky things and fantasy are OK just if you transition it from fantasy to reality ensure it is: safe, sane, and consensual.

If any of those elements are missing - then the plan needs to be altered.

Just because something is kinky and sexy doesnt mean it should be fully pursued in its original state. Also, if a couple has a sexual fantasy - both parties should extend the same amount of energy and effort into the research and details of it as well, you know?

Just throwing that out there to dispel the kind of implied notion that bc kink is kinky it is all good. IDK if your husband has ill intentioned motivations at all and that isnt for me to speculate but people often get carried away with the thrill of a fantasy that thinking about the rational details of it (and the context, plus if it is the best situation for their partner at that time) can often be overshadowed. It doesnt mean ill intent it just means 'wooo fantasy'. Which is why it is good youre getting a diversity of opinion and weighing what makes sense.

Ive seen scenarios where guys LOVE the idea of cuckolding (which is all this is) but in application the reality of it drives them nuts (resentment, jealousy, feels cheated on), particularly if you both have no prior history of consensual extramarital relations. Just throwing that out there as a factor to consider as sometimes guys into cuckolding just tunnel vision focus on the salaciousness of it but havent seriously considered how theyll feel after it occurs.

Just throwing that out there as a critical conversation topic to have about indulging in this fantasy. If that's been covered, cool. If it hasnt, definitely talk that out. If you both just like the idea of you being his slutty slutty mcslut - there are so many other ministeps to take before taking this leap. Building up to a climax makes the climax so much better instead of just leaping off of a cliff.... bc there is no way to top yourself. Plus pros/cons conversations can be had while building up the fantasy and taking it further and further. By then itll be a logical thought through enterprise.... that is safe, sane, and consensual.

yoda57us
09-01-2012, 11:19 AM
Game, set, match....

All Good Things
09-01-2012, 11:23 AM
^ Well, forgive me if I'm reading this the wrong way, and I may very well be, but it appears that he did give his input, early on, and then got jumped on. Again, not defending his outrage. But there you are.

Today's posts -- including most prominently yours -- backed him into a corner by lecturing him about how none of us really knows anything about this woman's life at all.

But he does know about her life. He's talked to her about it right here on SW. A lot. He lives that lifestyle.

I have no corner on the truth by any means, but I thought his insight was more valuable from that sharing with the OP. Let's at least keep the tent as open as possible.

Djoser
09-01-2012, 11:23 AM
Ill be bummed if someone seeking feedback (that she led in with asking 'is this a bad idea', that she sought further info from outside of a very public group chat situation) from people actually in this profession turn into a pissing match between a bunch of dudes not in this profession.

:shrug:

I've been working in the adult industry for more than a dozen years. More than that if you want to consider all the couple hundred or so Wet-T shirt contests lol.

Though I have not dealt directly with the process of escorting in terms of the actual business transactions, I have worked in more than one club where prostitution was going on in a major way, quite openly. I have also worked in numerous clubs (probably 7 out of ten that I knew of for sure) in which many of the dancers were also very active escorts. I knew who they were, I knew many of their customers, I knew their husbands and boyfriends

In two out of the three first clubs I worked in, crooked cops dropped by almost every night and hung out for several hours. They knew all about the prostitution/escorting going on, trust me--because they were involved in it. In the second club, there had to have been police payoffs, due to the fact that 65-80% of the dancers were sucking dick in VIP. Lola, the 54 year old hooker, had the taxi drivers bringing cabloads of guys to get blown for kickbacks. I am quite sure the local cops weren't unaware of all this shit going on.

I used to go to grab a glass of water when I was doing the bodypainting there, and she'd be hiding behind the partition in the dressing room, furtively draining the cum out of her pussy. She literally had holes in the knees of her stockings onstage.

I worked in another club in which the manager used to love to watch the dancers (who were mostly prostitutes) kick the shit out of each other. He would sic his favorites on new girls occasionally.

Since I knew that prostitution was going on inside two of these clubs, I was literally a pimp when I tried as hard as I could to get guys to take advantage of the 2-4-1s to get their dicks sucked.

So I think I know quite a bit about the business of selling sex, the underhand involvement of the law, and the pimp mentality.

But of course I know a lot less than the escorts. Which is why I moved the thread here.

Aether
09-01-2012, 11:32 AM
I used to go to grab a glass of water when I was doing the bodypainting there, and she'd be hiding behind the partition in the dressing room, furtively draining the cum out of her pussy. She literally had holes in the knees of her stockings onstage.

Small aside: Ahahahaa, that sounds kind of gross. No condoms? And draining it onto what, the floor? Gaaah. How are these guys not afraid of a pro that doesn't use condoms?

roast
09-01-2012, 11:34 AM
It isnt have a penis - no vote, if male escorts were posting Id be more gender neutral --- he has made his opinion very well known, he isnt being silenced or cant vote or anything even remotely dramatic like that. Just that the baiting is getting silly and is obvious (aka the urine, omg the piss, the goldenshowers ahhh). The whole 'unemotional' thing while still being super emotional is what (some) men use in arguments among women so I focused on that. But youre right, not just penis wildin out in this thread - so I apologize, I misspoke.... but Ive thanked djoser and yoda several times for their feedback so I didnt mean my comment to overshadow contributions Ive agreed with. Just that there have been a few threads that are simple conversations that go irrational really quickly between people insisting on attention redirects and threads need to be shut down or deleted because of it. it gets real tedious esp if ppl insist it isnt what it obviously is.

A number of people who live this lifestyle (every role) have answered.

Eye has been very receptive to all kinds of advice. She spoke to AJ in chat but extended the conversation to the forum... so she wanted more opinions. She has thanked people who have contributed. The white knight thing of defending her with such vitriol when she seems fine & hasnt asked for it is bizarre, The cursing, name calling, victim cum internet tough guy stuff, and urine spraying is silly. I dont get the controversy.

Djoser
09-01-2012, 11:42 AM
Small aside: Ahahahaa, that sounds kind of gross. No condoms? And draining it onto what, the floor? Gaaah. How are these guys not afraid of a pro that doesn't use condoms?

It was literally surreal, working in that club. Fortunately, there wasn't any golden shower shit going on there, but everything else under the sun was.

Sorry, threadjack. I'm just ducking the copious streams of piss being sprayed around.

:rotfl:

Almost Jaded
09-01-2012, 12:19 PM
Thank you for a good post, Roast.

The OP has posted several times explaining what's really up and what she's after. It has been clarified and explained.

And yet there is STILL this kind of attitude floating around that this is some kind of money-making venture that her husband is out to profit from, and that he's somehow behind this fantasy and there's something wrong with him for that, and something wrong with Eye for not seeing the forest for teh trees and OMG her husbands a PIMP!!!

And I'M the crazy one?

EYE HAS A FANTASY THAT INVOLVES GETTING PAID TO HAVE SEX. Newsflash everyone - this isn't all that uncommon with women.

Eye's husband supports her and is involved with her evolving sexuality. He helps her realize fantasies that she has, and probably vice-versa though we're not discussing that here. THAT'S A GOOD THING FOLKS. Not many relationships can say the same.

And that is it. The OP has stated that her husband works full time and supports them just fine. She has stated that her husband isn't pushing her into anything. She has stated that this is about fulfilling a sexual fantasy, not about starting a life as an escort or a prostitute.

And still the BS continues, and somehow I'm the bad guy for standing up and saying that you people have this wrong. :shakehead:

yoda57us
09-01-2012, 12:55 PM
^ Well, forgive me if I'm reading this the wrong way, and I may very well be, but it appears that he did give his input, early on, and then got jumped on. Again, not defending his outrage. But there you are.

His initial "input" on post #18 of the thread was to bash pretty much everything that was posted previously by other members, none of whom had bashed anyone to that point. That may have something to do with why he got jumped on.


Today's posts -- including most prominently yours -- backed him into a corner by lecturing him about how none of us really knows anything about this woman's life at all.

Actually, what I said was that none of us needs to know anything about the woman's life to have an opinion on the words that she chose to post in post #1 of the thread.


But he does know about her life. He's talked to her about it right here on SW. A lot. He lives that lifestyle.

Well, that's just fine and dandy. It sounds like he would be qualified to give her advice on the topic. That does not however, make the rest of SW's membership unqualified to express opinions in the thread without being berated by AJ or anyone else for that matter.


I have no corner on the truth by any means, but I thought his insight was more valuable from that sharing with the OP. Let's at least keep the tent as open as possible.

Agreed, so, in the interest of keeping the tent open and inclusive, I entered this thread to remind AJ, and anyone one else who cares to read my words, that we all have a right to express an opinion here on whatever topics get posted and we don't have to follow chat, read the entire contents of all SW threads, PM OP's or read minds to do it...

yoda57us
09-01-2012, 01:05 PM
And I'M the crazy one?


And still the BS continues, and somehow I'm the bad guy for standing up and saying that you people have this wrong. :shakehead:

Speaking for only myself AJ the only thing I take issue with is your apparent disregard for the fact that we all have a right to express an opinion based solely on what people post here in a particular thread. I don't think you are crazy and I don't think your advice, what little you've offered here between accusatory rants, is bad. I do think that, for whatever reason, you are taking this all too personally.

jannisary
09-01-2012, 01:53 PM
Eye, I noticed you're location is somewhere in MO. If this is something you seriously want to experience, you can fairly easily stick your toe in the waters to try it out at several of the "Eastside" clubs near St. Louis. These are clubs were "extras" are the norm so you wouldn't be hurting any "legit" dancer business and services range from HJ to FS depending on the club and what each individual girl is willing to do. If this is just a "fantasy" thing you want to try for a little bit that might be your best option. If you truly want to escort and do it safely you need to do a lot of reading and studying here and the boards specifically tailored to that industry.

Joanna_Kaary
09-01-2012, 05:36 PM
I just remembered an article I read... I think it was in Playboy but I can't remember because it was like 3 years ago. It was about a woman who had a fantasy about prostituting herself. She got an older man with disposable income that she already knew to be her "trick" and agree to pay for sex. It was safe because she already knew him... maybe you could get someone you and your husband already know through swinging to do this sort of role-playing with you, Eye?

On an unrelated note, Djoser, I don't think you are a pimp for trying to make customers buy 2-4-1 that involved extras, and I mean that as a good thing because I think pimps are pretty low human beings. A pimp, to me, is a man that makes money off of the sex industry by manipulating a female. Sure, he may also be manipulating males, but it's the control of a woman's body and more importantly her mind that make him a pimp. I would call what you were doing promoting. Unless a man is systematically breaking down a woman's psyche, turning her out, and then collecting all or most of the money she makes, he's no more of a pimp than most of the rappers that portray themselves as such.

Djoser
09-01-2012, 07:10 PM
Now there's a constructive reply, and a great suggestion for a safe way to act out a prostitution fantasy. Thank you J_K.

Kellydancer
09-01-2012, 09:51 PM
I've been working in the adult industry for more than a dozen years. More than that if you want to consider all the couple hundred or so Wet-T shirt contests lol.

Though I have not dealt directly with the process of escorting in terms of the actual business transactions, I have worked in more than one club where prostitution was going on in a major way, quite openly. I have also worked in numerous clubs (probably 7 out of ten that I knew of for sure) in which many of the dancers were also very active escorts. I knew who they were, I knew many of their customers, I knew their husbands and boyfriends

In two out of the three first clubs I worked in, crooked cops dropped by almost every night and hung out for several hours. They knew all about the prostitution/escorting going on, trust me--because they were involved in it. In the second club, there had to have been police payoffs, due to the fact that 65-80% of the dancers were sucking dick in VIP. Lola, the 54 year old hooker, had the taxi drivers bringing cabloads of guys to get blown for kickbacks. I am quite sure the local cops weren't unaware of all this shit going on.

I used to go to grab a glass of water when I was doing the bodypainting there, and she'd be hiding behind the partition in the dressing room, furtively draining the cum out of her pussy. She literally had holes in the knees of her stockings onstage.

I worked in another club in which the manager used to love to watch the dancers (who were mostly prostitutes) kick the shit out of each other. He would sic his favorites on new girls occasionally.

Since I knew that prostitution was going on inside two of these clubs, I was literally a pimp when I tried as hard as I could to get guys to take advantage of the 2-4-1s to get their dicks sucked.

So I think I know quite a bit about the business of selling sex, the underhand involvement of the law, and the pimp mentality.

But of course I know a lot less than the escorts. Which is why I moved the thread here.

Not to change the subject but were any of these clubs near Chicago? one club (the one with the crooked cops)sounds like a club I danced at. This club as far as I know didn't have prostitution inside the club but did pimp out the girls. I didn't know this at the time but years later a DJ told me this and I was stunned that this was happening. Even though I danced for years in clubs I was pretty naive about the prostitution going on in any club because I was never involved.

Djoser
09-01-2012, 10:17 PM
No, I lived in Chicago for 5 years, 4 to finish college and a little extra to wait for my girlfriend at the time to do the same. But that was long before I ever dreamed I would become a pimp whoops stripclub DJ.

Don't feel bad, I was completely oblivious to the prostitution going on in my first club, and have been relatively naive about what was really going on in most of the others. But eventually it started to sink in.

I will never forget having to track down the next girls & plan carefully what music to play in one club, because the dancers were skipped for privates and they could go in 5 seconds before you called their name, or even as you were doing so. I went looking in the private dance room to see if the next girl was already in there, so I would know...there she was along with the two after her, all three of them down on their knees, heads bobbing away.

:D

Eye
09-02-2012, 08:23 AM
Go ahead and escort yourself out. Just know that with your attitude and being as ditzy as you are - you WILL be busted. If your husband just wants to see you fuck other guys, go to a sex club. You don't need to engage in the illegal activity of prostitution for that. About your husband having a full time job and not wanting to pimp you out - I've heard that from escorts that are currently being pimped out by their husbands and they're too delusional to realize it. The most dumbest thing one can do is to become an escort and not do any research. And asking a cop? Good luck with that. I've been escorting for 3 plus years on and off. We have wayyy too many clueless women in the business - we don't need one more.

Well, THAT was a bit rude and uncalled for.

The whole reason for this post was to get advice from professionals that have done this before. How is that "Ditzy"? I want to discuss the possibilities of this before I go about it. IF I ever go about it. Seems pretty smart to me!

As to the rest of you, I appreciate all the advice, opinions and whatnot. Contrary to popular belief. My husband IS NOT A PIMP! We have been married for 19 years, and have been talking about this for about 5 years now. We started swinging about 6 years ago. We enjoy sex, fantasy, all that jazz. We also go to nudist resorts and have tons of friends even Vanilla ones that know what we do. We are very open about our relationship to anyone that asks. In AJ's defense, I think he's taking it personally because his relationship is similar to mine with my husband. While I appreciate the advice, I'm getting a little bit pissed personally about the attacks on my husband being a pimp. I can't believe one single post has turned into such crazy talk. We will decide AS A COUPLE whether or not to go through with this. We are NOT tight on money. Well, every little bit helps. We just didn't have extra money for my grandson's funeral! Thankfully my parents and many friends sent us money to help pay for it.

That being said, ya'll need to chilax a bit! Life is short, live to love, and be free!

Obenta
09-02-2012, 10:53 AM
OP, you must be realistic and weigh ALL of the risks and potential outcomes and decide if your "fantasy" is really worth pursuing.

Sometimes civillian women who think being a hooker is "all fun and sex games" needs a reality check about the risks. Professional escorts do this work every day, are aware of the risks and know how to reduce their risks. You do not which makes this "fun idea" (sex for money) more dangerous for you than it is for a pro.

Sure, you could meet a stranger for sex, and everything will be great. Your hubby will drive you to meet the guy and wait for you to return. You'll both furiously masterbate while you tell him all about it. Yay!

Or...

- The whole experience is disgusting. The client's hygeine is bad and he is disrespectful. He has a shitty personality and suddenly things aren't fun anymore, but you can't get out of the situation now. You're alone, behind locked doors with a stranger who isn't nice. You agreed to a $250 fee, but he only gives you $100.

- You get arrested for prostitution. Your name and photo are in the news for friends, neighbors, family, future employers (yours and your husband's) and all of your children's friends and teachers to see. You now have a criminal record. Your lawyer costs your family thousands, and your reputation is destroyed, whether you are actually convicted or not.

- If you later divorce, it WILL be used against you, regardless of whether hubby wanted it at the time.

- You get robbed or stalked by your client. He finds out where you live and begins blackmailing your family.

- You get beat up and raped. What if he raped you bareback and you get pregnant? Abortion? Can you imagine the guilt your husband would feel having encouraged you to do this? Now, instead of you and your husband living out a fun sexual fantasy, you're living a sexual nightmare.

- You are murdered.

I don't care how good a buddy your cop friend is, you have to remember that his career is law enforcement. He might be fine with swinging because that's not illegal. If you think he will help you with an illegal endeavor, you are probably very wrong. If you ask him to help you with this, you will probably ruin the friendship. Friends don't ask friends to compromise themselves. He would be risking his career, reputation and possibly his family. That's a pretty fucked up thing to ask your friend to do for something as silly as your little sex fantasy. Have some respect.

Asking a cop to advise you on how to break the law is pretty stupid (and naive). LE is very active busting prostitutes in parts of MO. (Another thing a pro would know, but you did not!)

Yes, there are ways to act out this fantasy safely. Some have already given you some suggestions. I strongly suggest you try them.


I want to get paid to have sex. It's been a mission of ours for years. but I can't afford to get caught! So my plan is to call up a friend of ours that is a local sheriff's deputy and ask him if he would be willing to hook me up. Is that a bad ides? Or do you think the local popo does more than they're willing to let on?

kortneykay
09-02-2012, 01:23 PM
My opinion is, if you can't afford to get caught, don't do it because you probably will.

rickdugan
09-02-2012, 07:38 PM
Eye's husband supports her and is involved with her evolving sexuality. He helps her realize fantasies that she has, and probably vice-versa though we're not discussing that here. THAT'S A GOOD THING FOLKS. Not many relationships can say the same.

Maybe some of us on here cannot understand why her husband would not try to talk her out of it or, at the very least, demonstrate serious misgivings. Maybe some of us cannot help but think that his being supportive of it, so much so that Eye billed it as "our fantasy", is troubling on its face. Maybe some of us wished that he was as concerned with her safety and well-being as he is with helping her fulfill this fantasy.

Sorry to say it this way, but I cannot help but be depressed when I read that a guy can sit blithely by, and even actively facilitate, the selling of sex for money by the mother of his children.

Almost Jaded
09-02-2012, 08:15 PM
The same way the women here respond respectfully to male members who openly admit to cheating on their spouse with paid escorts despite thinking it's a bad thing, I suppose.

rickdugan
09-02-2012, 08:34 PM
The same way the women here respond respectfully to male members who openly admit to cheating on their spouse with paid escorts despite thinking it's a bad thing, I suppose.

Well, I'm not really sure how that is relevant.

The girls on here have been respectful to a lot of guys. Yes, they have been respectful to cheating dogs. They have also been respectful to older guys who pick up young dancers with Daddy issues and then live off of their earnings, all the while claiming to be too disabled to get a job. They have even been respectful to people who dumped their children upon others, all the while claiming that it was in the child's best interest to be separated from both parents.

But again, I'm not sure how all of that us pertinent here. My only point was that many people would expect a married man to have misgivings about his wife selling herself for money. The fact that this guy does not seem to have those misgivings gives rise to certain concerns.

Anyway, just my two cents.

yoda57us
09-02-2012, 08:40 PM
LOL, now this is just getting silly. There are plenty glass houses to go around among the members of StripperWeb. So now we are going to judge who's brand of morality is more moral? Oh please....

rickdugan
09-02-2012, 08:50 PM
LOL, now this is just getting silly. There are plenty glass houses to go around among the members of StripperWeb. So now we are going to judge who's brand of morality is more moral? Oh please....

LOL. I don't disagree. For some reason AJ seems to be taking this personally, which I guess is why he decided to take a cheap shot rather than respond to the comment. My response was designed to question the relevance of that cheap shot while also highlighting the prevalence of glass houses. ;)

Almost Jaded
09-02-2012, 08:56 PM
There are plenty glass houses to go around among the members of StripperWeb. So now we are going to judge who's brand of morality is more moral? Oh please....

Precisely.

Lovelyme
09-03-2012, 03:19 AM
OP, you must be realistic and weigh ALL of the risks and potential outcomes and decide if your "fantasy" is really worth pursuing.

Sometimes civillian women who think being a hooker is "all fun and sex games" needs a reality check about the risks. Professional escorts do this work every day, are aware of the risks and know how to reduce their risks. You do not which makes this "fun idea" (sex for money) more dangerous for you than it is for a pro.

Sure, you could meet a stranger for sex, and everything will be great. Your hubby will drive you to meet the guy and wait for you to return. You'll both furiously masterbate while you tell him all about it. Yay!

Or...

- The whole experience is disgusting. The client's hygeine is bad and he is disrespectful. He has a shitty personality and suddenly things aren't fun anymore, but you can't get out of the situation now. You're alone, behind locked doors with a stranger who isn't nice. You agreed to a $250 fee, but he only gives you $100.

- You get arrested for prostitution. Your name and photo are in the news for friends, neighbors, family, future employers (yours and your husband's) and all of your children's friends and teachers to see. You now have a criminal record. Your lawyer costs your family thousands, and your reputation is destroyed, whether you are actually convicted or not.

- If you later divorce, it WILL be used against you, regardless of whether hubby wanted it at the time.

- You get robbed or stalked by your client. He finds out where you live and begins blackmailing your family.

- You get beat up and raped. What if he raped you bareback and you get pregnant? Abortion? Can you imagine the guilt your husband would feel having encouraged you to do this? Now, instead of you and your husband living out a fun sexual fantasy, you're living a sexual nightmare.

- You are murdered.

I don't care how good a buddy your cop friend is, you have to remember that his career is law enforcement. He might be fine with swinging because that's not illegal. If you think he will help you with an illegal endeavor, you are probably very wrong. If you ask him to help you with this, you will probably ruin the friendship. Friends don't ask friends to compromise themselves. He would be risking his career, reputation and possibly his family. That's a pretty fucked up thing to ask your friend to do for something as silly as your little sex fantasy. Have some respect.

Asking a cop to advise you on how to break the law is pretty stupid (and naive). LE is very active busting prostitutes in parts of MO. (Another thing a pro would know, but you did not!)

Yes, there are ways to act out this fantasy safely. Some have already given you some suggestions. I strongly suggest you try them.
Best post in this thread. Hopefully she takes the advice.

Lovelyme
09-03-2012, 03:40 AM
Well, THAT was a bit rude and uncalled for.

The whole reason for this post was to get advice from professionals that have done this before. How is that "Ditzy"? I want to discuss the possibilities of this before I go about it. IF I ever go about it. Seems pretty smart to me!

As to the rest of you, I appreciate all the advice, opinions and whatnot. Contrary to popular belief. My husband IS NOT A PIMP! We have been married for 19 years, and have been talking about this for about 5 years now. We started swinging about 6 years ago. We enjoy sex, fantasy, all that jazz. We also go to nudist resorts and have tons of friends even Vanilla ones that know what we do. We are very open about our relationship to anyone that asks. In AJ's defense, I think he's taking it personally because his relationship is similar to mine with my husband. While I appreciate the advice, I'm getting a little bit pissed personally about the attacks on my husband being a pimp. I can't believe one single post has turned into such crazy talk. We will decide AS A COUPLE whether or not to go through with this. We are NOT tight on money. Well, every little bit helps. We just didn't have extra money for my grandson's funeral! Thankfully my parents and many friends sent us money to help pay for it.

That being said, ya'll need to chilax a bit! Life is short, live to love, and be free!

Well, Eye, I'm a professional. But unlike a lot of others, I actually researched the business before I got in it.
I didn't just post and ad and start fucking for money the next day. That is how girls get arrested or worse, lose their life.

My reply to you was the truth. Wanting to get into escorting without doing research is a ditzy and stupid thing to do. It IS.
There ARE way too many dumb/clueless women in the escort business. Join the TER community, read the general discussion boards and you will see a lot of them posting. You do not need a degree to become an escort so the escort business attracts ALL sorts of women from ALL walks of life. We see them posting on the boards and most of us just sit back and shake our heads. When you've been in the business for years and some girl comes and says "Hi I want to be an escort" and haven't done her research it's unsettling because we know what can happen. We see girls come and go. It only takes one client to hurt you. I know escorts that can't construct a simple sentence but they are in TER top 100 because they can suck a good dick and take a size 13 cock up their ass - great. I know girls that don't screen and see anyone and everyone and their idea of screening is asking "Are you a cop?" over the phone. It's a freak show. What I was telling you is - if it's something you want to do, even for ONE day, be smart about it.

A really good friend of mine who is a very popular escort in New York once told me - "escorting is a numbers game - eventually you will meet that one client that will fuck with you and make you hate men forever or you will be busted". Well I haven't met either but you never know when you your time will come. Be careful. A lot of people will tell you to go for it but they've never been on our side of the fence NOR are they hobbyists. Yoda is a hobbyist so he can give you great advice. The others, not sure. Just be careful in whatever you do when it comes to the escort business.

Obenta was right. It only takes one client to mess with your head. You could be killed, raped, beaten..etc.
So entertingsuch profession knowing those things can happen and not trying to educate yourself, isn't really a smart thing to do.
I honestly don't know why the blues are posting here as if they know what happens in this industry.
Yoda is a hobbyists from what I understand and can give you great advice but I don't know about the others.

Jenny Demillo wrote a blog post about ladies like you wanting to get into the business. It was NOT nice but it was true.
Read her blog and you will see why I was short with you about getting into the business and not doing research. I've seen so many posts like yours and half of those girls have been arrested at least twice. If you came here hoping for us (the professionals in this thread) to tell you that escorts is all fairies and unicorns, you came to the wrong place. It's not. It is what you make of it. Be careful. Be paranoid but have fun. I know contradicting but once you start you'll know what I mean :D.

Obenta
09-03-2012, 04:14 AM
Thank you LovelyMe. I hope she shows my posts to her husband. If he is encouraging her, I don't think he is taking the risks seriously. Hopefully that will change.

Women, especially civillians, need to understand the seriousness of the situation and not approach it so flippantly. Everyone thinks "It won't happen to me!", especially newbies and civillians. As you well know, the scenarios I detailed happen many times, every single day to escorts all around the country. Pros know how to reduce their risks. Newbies and civillians don't.

Here is an example from just this week:

http://forum.myredbook.com/dcforum2/street/25111.html#1

If you read through the thread, the woman was murdered.

Everyone thinks "It won't happen to me!" - until they become a news story. It's not just streetwalkers that this sort of thing happens to. I know it may sound cliche, but the Craigslist killer met women in hotels. I know of a highly reviewed escort whose back was broken by a "client" at her incall. I've received 4 email alerts just this month about violent clients in my area. One of those clients forced BBFS and another choked and punched a woman at an agency incall. (Another woman was in the apartment, but didn't hear anything because the woman was being choked). Newbies and non-pros don't get those emails. Not being connected to the safety network of pros makes newbies and civillians much more vulnerable to predators. Predators take advantage of that.

Newbies and Civillians think this is all just fun & games. It is, but only when you know how to be safe.

Obenta
09-03-2012, 04:42 AM
Well, THAT was a bit rude and uncalled for.

The whole reason for this post was to get advice from professionals that have done this before. How is that "Ditzy"? I want to discuss the possibilities of this before I go about it. IF I ever go about it. Seems pretty smart to me!

As to the rest of you, I appreciate all the advice, opinions and whatnot. Contrary to popular belief. My husband IS NOT A PIMP! We have been married for 19 years, and have been talking about this for about 5 years now. We started swinging about 6 years ago. We enjoy sex, fantasy, all that jazz. We also go to nudist resorts and have tons of friends even Vanilla ones that know what we do. We are very open about our relationship to anyone that asks. In AJ's defense, I think he's taking it personally because his relationship is similar to mine with my husband. While I appreciate the advice, I'm getting a little bit pissed personally about the attacks on my husband being a pimp. I can't believe one single post has turned into such crazy talk. We will decide AS A COUPLE whether or not to go through with this. We are NOT tight on money. Well, every little bit helps. We just didn't have extra money for my grandson's funeral! Thankfully my parents and many friends sent us money to help pay for it.

That being said, ya'll need to chilax a bit! Life is short, live to love, and be free!

To "Almost Jaded" - While some of your advice is sound, and I understand you're defending her hubby as a good guy... You are not an escort. You may not fully appreciate the risks involved, as a professional would. You have repeatedly posted in defense of her husband. That is enough. We are now back on the topic of her original question and post. You do not need to continually defend her husband. You already have. It is possible that he does not truly understand the risks he is encouraging his wife to take, even if he does have good intentions. You may also not fully understand the risks. Please leave this to the actual professional escorts to advise her now.

To the OP - Your husband may not be a "pimp", but he is not fully aware of the risks to you, himself and your family. These risks are very real. These risks should be fully considered before moving forward with this idea. You and hubby can imagine all day that "It won't happen to us!" - because that way of thinking is more "fun" and feeds your fantasy. You both need a reality check.

Lovelyme
09-03-2012, 04:44 AM
Here is an example from just this week:



If you read through the thread, the woman was murdered.


You're welcome, Obenta.

Great example btw! A provider was looking for her friend, she hadn't heard from her for hours and later found out that she had been murdered. The last time she was spoke to her friend, she was with a client and she was pleading for her life. This is not a game. It is serious. You have to be smart to be survive. You have to know how to think quick. Not only do we screen to avoid LE, but we screen to avoid psychos and don't forget std risks. Eye, you were taking this thing way too lightly and that is why my initial response was what it was. You and your husband are better off sticking to your swinger community. Less risks, safer..etc

You're also spot on about "AJ".

Kellydancer
09-03-2012, 10:18 AM
Obenta, and LovelyMe, great posts. I'm not an escort or ever was but did bachelor parties and even with those I screened the guys because I have heard horror stories. Luckily I have one horrible experience out of hundreds but many dancers I know had several bad ones. These I always had a bouncer though most of the time he wasn't needed. There were a few times I went and did a one on one private party for a customer (basically I danced for him, nothing else)and sometimes I went without a bouncer but these times were long time regulars. Even so, with doing this I was taking a risk because while I knew these guys for years, sometimes people get weird.

Honestly the idea of going to a strange man's location for sex to me seems like too high of a risk. Not judging escorts at all, but it seems like something that would require keeping one's eyes open for any dangerous situations. The escorts I knew all met guys at high class hotels only because if there was a problem they figured it was easier to escape. A few times I went with them to the hotel but I sat outside and waited with the driver.

jannisary
09-03-2012, 10:22 AM
This is not a game. It is serious. You have to be smart to be survive. You have to know how to think quick. Not only do we screen to avoid LE, but we screen to avoid psychos and don't forget std risks.

And sometimes even with careful screening you still might wind up in a bad situation. Off the top of my head I can think of four escorts in IN, IL, and MO that have been seriously hurt and traumatized by screened clients they have seen before and several others who wound up in stalker type situations. Now, there may have been warning signs they missed or ignored, I don't know, but the four are all seasoned escorts with years of experience. This is a serious "hobby" and shit can go wrong quick.

Eye
09-03-2012, 06:55 PM
You guys are amazing!

Thanks again for all of your advice and posts. This is exactly what I needed to figure all this out. If we decide to go this route I'll let you know. But at this time, we're still thinking about it. I'm so glad this was moved to the right forum so that other people can read all the great advice!

Thank guys!

E

Almost Jaded
09-03-2012, 09:37 PM
To "Almost Jaded" - While some of your advice is sound, and I understand you're defending her hubby as a good guy... You are not an escort. You may not fully appreciate the risks involved, as a professional would. You have repeatedly posted in defense of her husband. That is enough. We are now back on the topic of her original question and post. You do not need to continually defend her husband. You already have. It is possible that he does not truly understand the risks he is encouraging his wife to take, even if he does have good intentions. You may also not fully understand the risks. Please leave this to the actual professional escorts to advise her now.

I never claimed to have any advice regarding your industry. And I know it was enough - notice how I stopped when the attacks on her hubby did?

Thank you ladies for your level-headed and sound advice. While not necessarily what the OP was watning to hear, it has given her something to think about and make a decision - which is both perfect, and what this thread should have been full of all along.

CupCake
09-04-2012, 08:46 AM
I'm going to jump in on this post one more time...AlmostJaded, since you have no advice why don't you stop berating other members about their opinions?

How do you know what the OP wants to hear btw, since you know what this thread should have been full of all along maybe you should have contributed something to do with the original topic.

Also- let's keep things civil, if you don’t like me block me, but please quite going around different threads on the site to post about people it's rude, uncalled for, and very catty.

Lovelyme
09-04-2012, 09:03 AM
I never claimed to have any advice regarding your industry. And I know it was enough - notice how I stopped when the attacks on her hubby did?

Thank you ladies for your level-headed and sound advice. While not necessarily what the OP was watning to hear, it has given her something to think about and make a decision - which is both perfect, and what this thread should have been full of all along.

Did you read her post at all? That's not what she said. It was what she needed to hear.


You guys are amazing!

Thanks again for all of your advice and posts. This is exactly what I needed to figure all this out. If we decide to go this route I'll let you know. But at this time, we're still thinking about it. I'm so glad this was moved to the right forum so that other people can read all the great advice!

Thank guys!

E

rickdugan
09-04-2012, 09:32 AM
I never claimed to have any advice regarding your industry. And I know it was enough - notice how I stopped when the attacks on her hubby did?

Sorry AJ, but from my vantage point the only person who attacked anyone else in this thread is you.

Other posters can only respond to what is printed. When they see a girl who is considering selling sex for money and presents the idea as "our fantasy" and "my husband's and my idea", they are naturally skeptical of the husband's role in it. Eye certainly seemed more than capable of addressing comments and questions regarding her husband's involvement and did so in a very level headed manner. She also obtained some other thoughts and insights that were probably good for her to read. Remember, this is a support site for Eye, not for the husband per se.

I don't know why you seemed so emotionally invested in this and, frankly, I probably don't want to know. But this place exists to serve as a support tool for sex industry workers like Eye, not to coddle the mysterious hypersensitivities of one dancer's boyfriend. IMHO the ladies should be able to exchange their ideas freely without feeling like they are being attacked or berated. If you did not like how the husband's role was being called into question, you certainly could have offered alternative thoughts without all of the over-the-top drama and hyperbole.

Djoser
09-04-2012, 11:05 AM
You guys are amazing!

Thanks again for all of your advice and posts. This is exactly what I needed to figure all this out. If we decide to go this route I'll let you know. But at this time, we're still thinking about it. I'm so glad this was moved to the right forum so that other people can read all the great advice!

Thank guys!

E

Well then I am very glad indeed I moved it here, where actual practicing escorts could advise you--I was given the entirely erroneous impression that my moving it to "Other Work" was somehow insulting to you, since it was a supposedly just a conversation about a sexual fantasy, not a thread about escorting or prostitution. So it is very satisfying to see that supposition was way off base. Not that I was convinced for one moment of the contrary, since you were considering the actual performance of prostitution.

About your husband--I said before that I sincerely hoped that my skepticism was entirely unfounded. I can know no more about the man's true motivation than anyone else who has never once actually met him.

So now that Eye has gotten what she wanted out of this thread, maybe we should let it rest...

Almost Jaded
09-04-2012, 01:35 PM
if you don’t like me block me, but please quite going around different threads on the site to post about people it's rude, uncalled for, and very catty.

Bahaha - don't flatter yourself sweetheart. I made ONE comment in ONE thread in a general sort of way, and it sure as shit wasn't about YOU.

Lovely - I said it probably wasn't what she WANTED to hear, not that it wasn't what she NEEDED to hear. In fact, in a post previous to the one you quoted, she said so, too.

Rick - My first post wasn't over the top. The posts got nastier, so did my replies.

Good point DJ, and good call.

Looks like it worked out in the end. Since apparently it's just going to be back and forth bullshit about my posts now, this should probably be closed.