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Optimist
07-13-2015, 02:14 PM
Here are the 13 Steps to Flashback Management from Pete Walker: http://www.pete-walker.com/13StepsManageFlashbacks.htm

13 Steps for Managing Flashbacks

Say to yourself: "I am having a flashback". Flashbacks take us into a timeless part of the psyche that feels as helpless, hopeless and surrounded by danger as we were in childhood. The feelings and sensations you are experiencing are past memories that cannot hurt you now.

Remind yourself: "I feel afraid but I am not in danger! I am safe now, here in the present." Remember you are now in the safety of the present, far from the danger of the past.

Own your right/need to have boundaries. Remind yourself that you do not have to allow anyone to mistreat you; you are free to leave dangerous situations and protest unfair behavior.

Speak reassuringly to the Inner Child. The child needs to know that you love her unconditionally- that she can come to you for comfort and protection when she feels lost and scared.

Deconstruct eternity thinking: in childhood, fear and abandonment felt endless - a safer future was unimaginable. Remember the flashback will pass as it has many times before.

Remind yourself that you are in an adult body with allies, skills and resources to protect you that you never had as a child. [Feeling small and little is a sure sign of a flashback]

Ease back into your body. Fear launches us into 'heady' worrying, or numbing and spacing out.
[a] Gently ask your body to Relax: feel each of your major muscle groups and softly encourage them to relax. (Tightened musculature sends unnecessary danger signals to the brain)
[b] Breathe deeply and slowly. (Holding the breath also signals danger).
[c] Slow down: rushing presses the psyche's panic button.
[d] Find a safe place to unwind and soothe yourself: wrap yourself in a blanket, hold a stuffed animal, lie down in a closet or a bath, take a nap.
[e] Feel the fear in your body without reacting to it. Fear is just an energy in your body that cannot hurt you if you do not run from it or react self-destructively to it.

Resist the Inner Critic's Drasticizing and Catastrophizing: [a] Use thought-stopping to halt its endless exaggeration of danger and constant planning to control the uncontrollable. Refuse to shame, hate or abandon yourself. Channel the anger of self-attack into saying NO to unfair self-criticism. [b] Use thought-substitution to replace negative thinking with a memorized list of your qualities and accomplishments

Allow yourself to grieve. Flashbacks are opportunities to release old, unexpressed feelings of fear, hurt, and abandonment, and to validate - and then soothe - the child's past experience of helplessness and hopelessness. Healthy grieving can turn our tears into self-compassion and our anger into self-protection.

Cultivate safe relationships and seek support. Take time alone when you need it, but don't let shame isolate you. Feeling shame doesn't mean you are shameful. Educate your intimates about flashbacks and ask them to help you talk and feel your way through them.

Learn to identify the types of triggers that lead to flashbacks. Avoid unsafe people, places, activities and triggering mental processes. Practice preventive maintenance with these steps when triggering situations are unavoidable.

Figure out what you are flashing back to. Flashbacks are opportunities to discover, validate and heal our wounds from past abuse and abandonment. They also point to our still unmet developmental needs and can provide motivation to get them met.

Be patient with a slow recovery process: it takes time in the present to become un-adrenalized, and considerable time in the future to gradually decrease the intensity, duration and frequency of flashbacks. Real recovery is a gradually progressive process [often two steps forward, one step back], not an attained salvation fantasy. Don't beat yourself up for having a flashback.

These deal with the kind of nightmare thoughts that keep anxiety high:

ENDANGERMENT ATTACKS

Drasticizing/Catastrophizing/Hypochondrisizing I feel afraid but I am not in danger. I am not “in trouble” with my parents. I will not blow things out of proportion. I refuse to scare myself with thoughts and pictures of my life deteriorating. No more home-made horror movies and disaster flicks.

Negative focus I renounce over-noticing & dwelling on what might be wrong with me or life around me. I will not minimize or discount my attributes. Right now, I notice, visualize and enumerate my accomplishments, talents and qualities, as well as the many gifts Life offers me, e.g., friends, nature, music, film, food, beauty, color, pets, etc.

Time Urgency I am not in danger. I do not need to rush. I will not hurry unless it is a true emergency. I am learning to enjoy doing my daily activities at a relaxed pace.
Disabling Performance Anxiety I reduce procrastination by reminding myself that I will not accept unfair criticism or perfectionist expectations from anyone. Even when afraid, I will defend myself from unfair criticism. I won’t let fear make my decisions.

Perseverating About Being Attacked Unless there are clear signs of danger, I will thought-stop my projection of past bully/critics onto others. The vast majority of my fellow human beings are peaceful people. I have legal authorities to aid in my protection if threatened by the few who aren’t. I invoke thoughts and images of my friends’ love and support.

Aniela
07-13-2015, 02:40 PM
SK, I realise I'm not exactly at the top of your Happy list anymore, & that's why I've stayed out of this thread so far, but I am going to put in anyway.

I am in agreement w/ Optimist here, both her initial responses & her followups ^^^^ re: side effects. Sry it's not what you want to hear right now, but she makes very good points. I am speaking here not to 'poke the hornet's nest' so to speak but from my own experience as well. As Optimist stated, anti-depressants are not Rx'd w/ the intent of being your sole, lifelong method of treatment. They are mainly meant as a tool to regulate/re-set brain chemistry, & intended to help 'get a handle' on treating the physical side of depression/mood disorders WHILE the patient works w/ a therapist to address the emotional aspects of their problem.

Unfortunately, fiddling w/ brain chemistry (even w/ the best of intentions) is not an exact science. The brain/mind is such a complex thing that it can be very difficult to nail down what will or will not work for a particular person. That's just what's up. Trial&error. I understand your frustration w/ antidepressants, bc I've had sm horrid experiences w/ them myself, to the point that I wouldn't want to go back on them. I have found other ways to deal w/ my shit (most of the time ... ::coughs nervously:: ) but it's a struggle either way & I have not been w/o setbacks. 'Other ways' have included months-long periods of outpatient therapy, the support of SW & largely just learning (slowly) to buckle down & ride-out the waves of anxiety/rage/whatever as they come, bc I deal w/ this shit too, even if it's not as recent as yours. :hug:

There's also the potential unintended consequences of dealing w/ your shit via illegal drugs. My thoughts on illicit drug use in general are no secret on this board, but again, I am trying to explain myself by my experiences rather than just coming across as 'spouting off' & being judgmental. Idk where you're located or how your area's been affected by the recent pro-pot legislations, but I will say this: just bc smtg is legal, doesn't make it safe. If it's not legal where you are, you are always going to have to contend w/ the risk of getting busted. You also may not have any better idea of what's mixed-in w/ your illicit meds than you do your legal meds. My college bf trusted his pot dealer & the bastard sold him a bag that had been laced w/ formaldehyde ... which he sorta-kinda forgot to inform him of at the time. I can assure you, that was a most un-glourious several days I spent dealing w/ him being sick like a dog, him in denial that it was 'that bad' (he was a full-on addict by then) & not even knowing wtf was wrong until his cousin came over & was like 'Oh shit bro, that asshole spiked your shit w/ embalming fluid' like it was nothing more than a very annoying prank. There are unscrupulous dealers who will cut pot w/ small amts of cocaine, meth or other hard drugs in an attempt to sneak-hook you & thus get more $$$$ when you come back round looking for the harder(pricier) high. Not to mention, the addiction factor & as Optimist further elaborated, all it does is mask what's wrong, it doesn't fix it.

It's good that you're getting out of stripping, whether temporarily or for good, if it's causing you that much dmg. When I scrolled up in this thread to double-check I saw that you mentioned not going back, but I thought I'd seen you post elsewhere abt starting again. I would agree that that's one of the worst things you could do for yourself. I would go so far as suggesting a complete break (temporary or permanent) from the adult industry if you're not already going in that direction, in order to let yourself fully heal. For me personally, it's not just the physical action of being violated that makes me crazy, it's the mentality that drives a person to commit that act of violation. If you were to stay in the industry as a camgirl for example, I would be concerned for you encountering that same mentality in your new niche, even if they can't physically harm you, & it having a further negative impact on your recovery.

miss.a.p1600
07-14-2015, 11:01 AM
I will say aniela makes a good point on the purity of black market weed. This is why, like sd's and regulars, you never rely on just one dealer. Bad dealers will have weed with mold, pesticides, and possibly hard core drugs laced in to get you hooked. I smell my weed and examine the hell out of it and if my instinct tells me it's not quality, I never buy from that person again. Only you know how to regulate your consumption to where you benefit your health and not to its detriment.

One thing I love to do on weed or not was get outside in nature. I've seen studies that showed being in nature helps ease ptsd symptoms.

Hope you're feeling better.

Flickdreams
07-19-2015, 09:19 AM
Such a great thread.

hippiechick
04-21-2017, 08:50 AM
The one thing that makes me sad about PTSD in the adult industry is that so many people outside of the industry will have this 'What are you complaining about, you signed up for this so what did you expect?' type of attitude including paid therapists which causes the person to then self-blame themselves for what is happening to them.

Signing up for a job that is taboo to the majority of societies norms does not mean that they have not given away their right for other people to treat them with the simple respect that all human beings deserve.

I know this is an old comment, but after being sexually assaulted at work on Tuesday, I needed to read this. Thank you!