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rickdugan
07-29-2013, 07:57 AM
Perhaps last night was some type of cosmic warning for me. I visited two clubs last night and came home with far too much evidence of my various crimes.

For starters, I visited my favorite at Club 1 and came to find out that she was covered in glitter. Unfortunately I did not learn this until she had transferred a fair amount of it onto my face and shirt. It was so damned dark by the bar that I did not notice it sooner. I only learned of it when another dancer commented about it, saying something to the effect of "you're gonna' get some guy divorced with that glitter you're wearing." This led me to step under some lights in another part of the club, where indeed I found that I had been infected. Imagine a grown man in the bathroom with baby wipes trying to get the glitter off of his face. The rocket scientist who covered me in it lost some money last night and will not be seeing another nickel from me in the future.

Next stop, Club 2, I was pitched OTC by an attractive girl and I bit. Now it was bad enough that she gave about the worst OTC performance that I've had in a while, but what compounded my displeasure was discovering her stripper bag in my car this morning. And, of course, my vehicle stank from one of those crappy Victoria Secrets scents that I not-so-affectionately refer to as eau du skank.

So my morning started with the disposal of both a nice shirt and this bag filled with stripper gear, and then moved on to a full service interior cleaning of my car to remove any lingering traces from that very smelly bag. As is the norm with VS eau du skank, everything it touched stank of the stuff. I felt bad about tossing the bag, which included stripper heels, her outfit and a hair iron, but I have no idea how to get in touch with this girl as I never received a phone number. Obviously I cannot just drop it at the club and I do not know when she is working again or when I will be going back. Now I might have been able to store it somewhere until the stars aligned again, but I could not take the chance given how badly the bag reeked - the scent was so strong that it would have filled up anyplace I tried to keep it with that odor and infected anything that it touched. Also, if the bag or any of its contents were discovered, how in the world would I ever explain it?

The most disturbing part, however, is that it was only good fortune that allowed me to get ahead of these issues. If a dancer had not tipped me off about the glitter, or if someone went to my car this morning before I did, then I might be having a different discussion now. I clearly need to do a better job of keeping my eyes open during these adventures.

Chili Palmer
07-29-2013, 08:07 AM
You know how there are approximately 4,512 threads by strippers on "Why not just get an escort instead of trying to get a stripper to have sex with me?" threads?

I really would like to know why strippers, knowing full well 90% of their customers are married, still insist upon wearing glitter. Is it some passive-aggressive way of "getting back" at customers? I would be really interested in reading some legitimate answers.

We've all had similar horror stories, Rick. Glad yours worked out. Remember, a bottle of Febreze in your car is your friend.

CP

LilyAnderson
07-29-2013, 08:07 AM
...O_o

Radius
07-29-2013, 11:18 AM
Hmmm, I must be uber-cautious. When I have an SO, I always plan to shower after a trip to the club, if I'm coming home to her. Always carried spare clothes, and you can join a 24-hour gym if you don't have other access to a shower at night. I could even explain the spare clothes in the car -- always carried a gym bag, with gym clothes and spare clothes, cause I'm a member of a 24-hour gym and you never know when I'm gonna go. That was a protocol I never varied from -- budget in half an hour of time to shower.

When I have an SO, I never drive the dancer in my car for OTC play, unless I know she's going easy on the perfume (that is, I texted her beforehand and asked her). I found that sometimes, she can wear a perfume so strong that the seatbelt will literally smell for *days*. If the scent is subtle, you could always blame it on a business lunch and claim that nice woman from marketing who you had lunch with just wears too much perfume. But that's not believable with some scents, obviously!

whirlerz
07-29-2013, 11:38 AM
Ugh that stinks, literally hun. Sorry couldn't resist..anyway my roomie's fond of Axe (bleh) so I keep Ozium, it's an air sanitizer spray, it has a very light mint scent, which does not linger (Fabreeze is kinda perfurmey to my allergies) made to dispell smoke odors, which I also deal with..I get it @ O'Reilley's Auto parts. It comes in a handy take with size too. Also recommending Neutrogena fragrance-free lotion cleanser, might do a better job w/the glitter. You can get a small empty bottle for a take with size to carry it with you in pocket/car. hth.

Kellydancer
07-29-2013, 11:42 AM
Speaking from the dancer point of view, I never wore glitter and wore light (if any)perfume)because of this. Granted I never did OTC and only did air dances but even then the stank could go from me to the customer. I was reminded of this because I would often kiss my regulars on the cheek (which believe it or not got me in trouble at a club)and left a lip stain. I didn't give it much thought until one of my regulars reminded me that he had a jealous wife so after that I didn't kiss him or one of us had wipes.

Dancers all know OTC is going on and has been going on forever (and yes even no contact clubs I danced at had OTC dancers). Those who provide this should be even more careful not to leave any evidence behind.

safado
07-29-2013, 02:22 PM
Perhaps last night was some type of cosmic warning for me. I visited two clubs last night and came home with far too much evidence of my various crimes.

For starters, I visited my favorite at Club 1 and came to find out that she was covered in glitter. Unfortunately I did not learn this until she had transferred a fair amount of it onto my face and shirt. It was so damned dark by the bar that I did not notice it sooner. I only learned of it when another dancer commented about it, saying something to the effect of "you're gonna' get some guy divorced with that glitter you're wearing." This led me to step under some lights in another part of the club, where indeed I found that I had been infected. Imagine a grown man in the bathroom with baby wipes trying to get the glitter off of his face. The rocket scientist who covered me in it lost some money last night and will not be seeing another nickel from me in the future.

Next stop, Club 2, I was pitched OTC by an attractive girl and I bit. Now it was bad enough that she gave about the worst OTC performance that I've had in a while, but what compounded my displeasure was discovering her stripper bag in my car this morning. And, of course, my vehicle stank from one of those crappy Victoria Secrets scents that I not-so-affectionately refer to as eau du skank.

So my morning started with the disposal of both a nice shirt and this bag filled with stripper gear, and then moved on to a full service interior cleaning of my car to remove any lingering traces from that very smelly bag. As is the norm with VS eau du skank, everything it touched stank of the stuff. I felt bad about tossing the bag, which included stripper heels, her outfit and a hair iron, but I have no idea how to get in touch with this girl as I never received a phone number. Obviously I cannot just drop it at the club and I do not know when she is working again or when I will be going back. Now I might have been able to store it somewhere until the stars aligned again, but I could not take the chance given how badly the bag reeked - the scent was so strong that it would have filled up anyplace I tried to keep it with that odor and infected anything that it touched. Also, if the bag or any of its contents were discovered, how in the world would I ever explain it?

The most disturbing part, however, is that it was only good fortune that allowed me to get ahead of these issues. If a dancer had not tipped me off about the glitter, or if someone went to my car this morning before I did, then I might be having a different discussion now. I clearly need to do a better job of keeping my eyes open during these adventures.

Do you think that she may have left it there on purpose to mess with you?

shanna dior
07-29-2013, 03:57 PM
I really would like to know why strippers, knowing full well 90% of their customers are married, still insist upon wearing glitter. Is it some passive-aggressive way of "getting back" at customers? I would be really interested in reading some legitimate answers.

The dancers who wear glitter aren't thinking about the possibility that the glitter will come off onto their customers, their wives will see it, and they will get in trouble. They just think it's cute. The dancers who think about it realize that the customer getting into trouble means he probably won't be back in the club anytime soon, and so they forego the glitter. Pretty simple!

rickdugan
07-29-2013, 06:03 PM
The dancers who wear glitter aren't thinking about the possibility that the glitter will come off onto their customers, their wives will see it, and they will get in trouble. They just think it's cute. The dancers who think about it realize that the customer getting into trouble means he probably won't be back in the club anytime soon, and so they forego the glitter. Pretty simple!

I would have to agree. I don't see too many strippers wearing glitter anymore, but the ones that do tend to be young and the few I've spoken with over the years seemed to be genuinely clueless about the potential issues.

Though that is small consolation when I'm in a club bathroom grabbing baby wipes from the attendant because some girl didn't have enough common sense to understand that leaving stuff on club customers might not be a good idea. ;)

rickdugan
07-29-2013, 06:06 PM
Do you think that she may have left it there on purpose to mess with you?

LOL. Anything is possible I suppose, but I doubt it. She knew that I had no easy way to get back in contact with her and I'm guessing that she's missing her outfits, heels and hair iron right about now.

Golden_Rule
07-30-2013, 05:31 AM
As someone who professionally collected evidence I can tell you that there will come a time that you miss something obvious that will get you busted. The longer you do something you are trying not to get caught at the greater the probability of getting caught.

That said, I find the aforementioned Ozium to be the best at eliminating scents. Since I work long hours that usually requires travel by car for some distances so I do carry a change of clothes. Further, having that as an excuse to be away leaves me "X+" amount of hours accounted for (meaning I'm not on a specific clock).

I carry with me a very cute little flash light/laser toy (smaller than a Bic lighter) which can be used in a club to make interesting patterns on a ceiling or wall, or 60's type butterfly on dancer's tummy... "Look it even has a retro kind of blacklight thingee... Oh, look at that, all your glitter I couldn't see before just lite you up like a Christmas tree. How interesting, now go away." :D

I like the 24 hour gym idea. I'm adding that to my repertoire. Thanks.

Golden_Rule
07-30-2013, 05:39 AM
Speaking from the dancer point of view, I never wore glitter and wore light (if any)perfume)because of this. Granted I never did OTC and only did air dances but even then the stank could go from me to the customer. I was reminded of this because I would often kiss my regulars on the cheek (which believe it or not got me in trouble at a club)and left a lip stain. I didn't give it much thought until one of my regulars reminded me that he had a jealous wife so after that I didn't kiss him or one of us had wipes. Dancers all know OTC is going on and has been going on forever (and yes even no contact clubs I danced at had OTC dancers). Those who provide this should be even more careful not to leave any evidence behind.Actually it has been my experience that it's easier to find quality OTC at the higher end air dance clubs. The more prostitution that goes on in the club the less likely it is to find customers looking for OTC and dancers providing it. It logical when you think about it. From a provider perspective why take the risk of OTC if you can sell sex acts right in the club, and from the customer's why look for OTC when you can get sex in the club.

whirlerz
07-30-2013, 05:46 AM
:rotfl:I don't know why, but this thread's now cracking me up! GR loving your tight logic too Sorry end T/J

Flickdreams
07-30-2013, 05:49 AM
^ Actually, the gym bag idea is on a lot of "Is my man cheating" forums/books etc.

yoda57us
07-30-2013, 06:19 AM
I'm not married anymore but did more than my share of clubbing in high contact clubs when I was. I always had a change of clothes, or two, in my car and also made it a point to wear cologne regularly in order to help mask the scent of others. In the days when smoking in the club was allowed that odor would pretty much permeate my clothes even as a non smoker. Fortunately a lot of my work was in bars back then so I had a good cover. The glitter thing is inexcusable and is actually banned in most of the clubs in RI by management and has been for years. Yeah, some girls are stupid about this sort of thing. Not really a surprise.

rickdugan
07-30-2013, 07:26 AM
Actually it has been my experience that it's easier to find quality OTC at the higher end air dance clubs. The more prostitution that goes on in the club the less likely it is to find customers looking for OTC and dancers providing it. It logical when you think about it. From a provider perspective why take the risk of OTC if you can sell sex acts right in the club, and from the customer's why look for OTC when you can get sex in the club.

This is consistent with my experiences as well. My strong preference is to engage in dicier activities OTC, but in certain areas I've had to bend a bit on this position. Not only can it be more difficult to source OTC from girls who perform dicier activities ITC, but the cost difference can be significant as well.

But having said all of that, this was not the situation here as dicier ITC activities are not prevalent in the area in which I now reside.

Radius
07-30-2013, 10:12 AM
This is consistent with my experiences as well. My strong preference is to engage in dicier activities OTC, but in certain areas I've had to bend a bit on this position. Not only can it be more difficult to source OTC from girls who perform dicier activities ITC, but the cost difference can be significant as well.


Completely consistent with my experience also. If you want to find quality OTC at an affordable price, higher end limited-contact clubs are where you want to go.

minnow
07-30-2013, 07:37 PM
Weighing in on the grown up version of this thread (Yes rick, I read it "over there" first.) ::)

My worst "residue" wasn't glitter, but guessing spray tan, excessive rouge (sp?), or maybe "Duos" special tat coverup formula. The smear of tannish-pink smudges on my light color dress shirt got me in the habit of wearing dark shirts to the club.

Your OTC dancer also had a lapse of attention, leaving her dancer bag in your car. (You must have really rattled/distacted her, rick. :D). I assume you gave her a ride in your car one, or both ways ? Another case for choosing a dancer who has her own ride. Yet, as GR pointed out, if you do something often enough, you'll invariably make mistakes. With all the business travel some members have done, have you ever misplaced/forgotten some key item ? One time (in pre direct deposit days), I left a company expense check in my hotel dressser drawer. :O Fortunately, I called desk clerk upon arrival at my destination. Room hadn't been sold yet, he promptly mailed check to my home address.

ava$
07-30-2013, 07:47 PM
First of all, if this is a thing you do frequently and your gf is smart she will catch on nomatter what you do. But the guy who said he showers at the gym that is open 24 hours is a good idea, ive even heard of guys checking into hotels to do this, lol. NOmatter what happens you will most likely get a bit of glitter on you if your really up close and personal with a stripper cause its in bronzers and make up as well, just less noticeable but I suppose a shower should get this off along with any strong perfume smells she could get on you. Also, you spraying a lot of cologne could help as well to cover this up.

lopaw
07-30-2013, 09:31 PM
I've been at this (ITC & OTC) for awhile and I'm pretty good at covering my tracks, so so far I haven't been busted. But I've certainly had more than my share of close calls. It's a genuine thrill sport for us married folks, and it's something that you can never let your guard down about. One small slip up and you're toast.
Good news is that I haven't run across any evil glitter in a very long time. Bad news is that I constantly run across spray tan & foundation that adheres itself everywhere except on the dancer. I've had to destroy more light colored clothing than I care to admit.

rickdugan
07-31-2013, 06:55 AM
Weighing in on the grown up version of this thread (Yes rick, I read it "over there" first.) ::)

My worst "residue" wasn't glitter, but guessing spray tan, excessive rouge (sp?), or maybe "Duos" special tat coverup formula. The smear of tannish-pink smudges on my light color dress shirt got me in the habit of wearing dark shirts to the club.

Your OTC dancer also had a lapse of attention, leaving her dancer bag in your car. (You must have really rattled/distacted her, rick. :D). I assume you gave her a ride in your car one, or both ways ? Another case for choosing a dancer who has her own ride. Yet, as GR pointed out, if you do something often enough, you'll invariably make mistakes. With all the business travel some members have done, have you ever misplaced/forgotten some key item ? One time (in pre direct deposit days), I left a company expense check in my hotel dressser drawer. :O Fortunately, I called desk clerk upon arrival at my destination. Room hadn't been sold yet, he promptly mailed check to my home address.

I posted it on both sites as I thought that this was equally relevant to both. It is something that I rarely do, but I thought that a good close call story might be universally digestible.

I did indeed drive her from the club to the hotel, which is how her bag ended up in my car. Also, since I did not drive her home as she was staying about a block away from the hotel, this just sort of escaped her and I obviously did not see her bag in the dark or I could have flagged her down. I am at least thankful that she kept her purse and other valuables with her as I would have had to try to track her down otherwise.

As amazing as I always find this to be, a fair number of the strippers that I deal with do not seem to own cars. I suspect that license issues are the reason for some and for others the inability to hold onto money, but regardless of the reasons it is a reality and using it as a disqualifier would really cut into the prospect pool.

Morty the Mortal
08-21-2013, 01:26 PM
That reminds me of an anecdote about an acquaintance who came home drunk after a long night of partying and got bitched out by his wife for trying to kiss her while still covered in "slut dust".

Kellydancer
08-21-2013, 04:43 PM
Actually it has been my experience that it's easier to find quality OTC at the higher end air dance clubs. The more prostitution that goes on in the club the less likely it is to find customers looking for OTC and dancers providing it. It logical when you think about it. From a provider perspective why take the risk of OTC if you can sell sex acts right in the club, and from the customer's why look for OTC when you can get sex in the club.

Not saying it doesn't happen, but that the sleazier clubs I danced at had a bigger problem. I do know that at many clubs I danced that were air dances some of the dancers were doing OTC.

Kellydancer
08-21-2013, 06:45 PM
Actually it has been my experience that it's easier to find quality OTC at the higher end air dance clubs. The more prostitution that goes on in the club the less likely it is to find customers looking for OTC and dancers providing it. It logical when you think about it. From a provider perspective why take the risk of OTC if you can sell sex acts right in the club, and from the customer's why look for OTC when you can get sex in the club.

Not saying it doesn't happen, but that the sleazier clubs I danced at had a bigger problem. I do know that at many clubs I danced that were air dances some of the dancers were doing OTC.

simone87
08-21-2013, 06:51 PM
I really would like to know why strippers, knowing full well 90% of their customers are married, still insist upon wearing glitter. Is it some passive-aggressive way of "getting back" at customers? I would be really interested in reading some legitimate answers.

CP

i've known more than one dancer who liked glitter, and actually didn't mind if the guy was covered in "divorce dust" as they put it, and thought they probably secretly deserved it. i don't wear it, not because i give a shit about most of them getting caught but because yeah, they won't get dances. self tanner is a different matter though, i really need to start being more careful about that!

sunnyzragon
08-21-2013, 07:39 PM
I was at Hustler's in Baltimore last week. After 6 dances from 3 lovely dancers, I smelt like a Sephora store :). Way to risky to get home in that condition!!

Golden_Rule
08-22-2013, 07:20 AM
i've known more than one dancer who liked glitter, and actually didn't mind if the guy was covered in "divorce dust" as they put it, and thought they probably secretly deserved it. i don't wear it, not because i give a shit about most of them getting caught but because yeah, they won't get dances. self tanner is a different matter though, i really need to start being more careful about that!

See, that is why I love my adorable little laser, black light, toy. "Look how cute it is when I turn on the black light... look at the stuff that is illuminated... including all [insert dancer in question] "divorce dust". Er, no, I don't want a lap dance and please don't hug me. Thanks."{LOL}

8)

CFMNH44
08-29-2013, 07:25 AM
You know you could have recouped you night's expenses by selling the bag on eBay right?

"For Sale: Complete stripper kit for the beginning stripper or the fetish buyer"...

;-)


I felt bad about tossing the bag, which included stripper heels, her outfit and a hair iron

Radius
08-29-2013, 09:04 AM
That hair iron coulda been worth $150+ easy! Women don't tell us this stuff, but I cracked one of their secrets, which is: those hair irons can be crazy expensive and a prized possession, and I have heard about more than one strip club locker room fight over who may have stolen whose iron. Don't tell anyone I told you guys, or the Female Secrets Security Squad might come to my house and beaksldlkflff////..~~~~

The Snark
05-03-2014, 09:35 PM
My closest call was when I thought I'd be able to shower at home, but SO got home early. Smoking club was issue. I accidentally spilled a bit of gas on myself. Not something that can be done often, but works once.

Are you familiar with this story?

http://youtu.be/Kb5VA2QeaC8?t=2m30s

threlayer
05-29-2014, 02:18 PM
I hate lying, but I hate a jealousy-ridden, argumentive relationship more. So I blamed some of the perfume smell, if not heavy, on a perfumed hand cleaner I had used at the gas station/convenience store because of the excuse I used when I went to a club. Once I got a kiss on the cheek that left a red smudge that I didn't notice. I said on light questioning that it was from a candy I had dropped on a paper towel that I later used on my face. Those seemed to have worked. I don't need excuses/lies anymore.

Dominic.2
12-17-2015, 04:47 PM
Did anyone else read the thread title and think "disposing of the evidence" meant something else. ;)

J/K

My wife and I have a deal that that when I come home, I head straight for the shower and put my clothes by the washing machine and dispose of any other evidence (air out the car, air out my jacket, etc.). She doesn't care as long as she doesn't see it. She doesn't want it rubbed in her face. She understands that men need to be men, but, I do need to take care of business and as long as I put the family first, she DGAF. So I am pretty fortunate that she is understanding.

My evidence is mostly self tanner and body spray/lotion/perfume though. The baby stripper on my first night out was really bathed in the stuff. My most recent dancer was far more discreet. ;)