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shy_exhibitionist
12-10-2013, 02:18 PM
Thank you for the great advice, Ivyrose, I appreciate you taking the time to help me out.

After procrastinating for weeks, I finally told him last night. This may sound pathetic, but it was the bravest thing I've ever done. It was hard! Unfortunately despite all my planning out what to say, I started blubbering about money and didn't get all my points across. I was a little afraid that he would be angry, and I have bad habit of breaking down crying when I have to talk about something serious, so I came across as desperate for money and unhappy when I should have made it clear that camming gives me hope to get the hell out of my job and get my degree, and that it is something that will make me happy.

He was pretty shocked, and had to process it for a while. I am this mousy super shy girl who has trouble making eye contact with people, so he was kind of blown away. Unfortunately he thought it had to do with my fantasy of being watched so I had to play it down, like I didn't really want to cam, but had no other choice, which isn't true.

He didn't say I couldn't do it, but he did say he doesn't want me to. He said, I don't want you to masturbate in front of strangers. You'll love it, fuck yourself all day long and probably make a billion dollars, but what about your soul? Not in a religious way, he just thinks some things, like my pussy, should be sacred.

So I don't know. It doesn't look positive, but I'm not totally giving up. It feels good that it's out there now, so he can let the idea marinate, and we can talk about it some more.

MissQuirk
12-10-2013, 02:42 PM
:/ Well, I'm glad you spoke with him!!
That takes balls, girl :)

"you'll love it, fuck yourself all day long"
I do think he's maybe confused about that.

But if this is a good relationship you get to decide how you handle it- I'm sure it's difficult and confusing for you both.

Goooood luck <3