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~*SwanPrincess*~
05-20-2014, 05:48 PM
Dear regular who thinks they are my man,

You need to see this relationship for what it really is. Sure, I act sweet, interested, and like I actually like you. I don't. I hate the way you are so grabby with me every chance you get. I hate the way you try to grab my face in an attempt to mouth kiss me. I hate the way you act like you are giving me a massage and try and reach down and touch my pussy.
And I despise the way you think everything and all human relationships in life revolve around sex. They dont.
It grosses me out how your hands shake all excitedly when you try to touch me. Ugh.
But the worst thing is when you act like you own me. After our time is up and I am paid, I move on to the next customer. I don't need you "investigating" who else I dance for and do VIPs with. You don't need to compare yourself physically or professionally against ANY other guy. There's one reason I deal with ANY of you. Because you pay me.
You aren't my boyfriend or my husband. You have NO say in ANY of my relationships. In or outside of the club.
You are guaranteed money to me, and that is all.

Warped
05-27-2014, 05:01 AM
Dear customer,

Why do you try to entice me into your bed by explicitly describing your amazing oral sex skills, how you don't even want to cum, and how it is all about the woman? This is a horrible tactic. I know you are lying. Why else would you be paying me $25 per song to grind on you if not for your own pleasure? I don't want your nasty tongue anywhere near me. Gross

Shy2
05-27-2014, 09:01 AM
^Ugh yes, like "hey I'm sure that stripper has never slept with any man that wanted to make her cum and/or go down on her. (because every other guy has just slammed us and jizzed in our faces and left us like the whores we are) and I'm sure talking about how great I am and how much of generous lover I am will make her so horny she will have to go home with me"

audrey_k
05-27-2014, 01:05 PM
I hate those customers! I had some guy do a VIP trying to tell me how he just loves eating pussy, blah blah, and I was like oh well that's nice I guess. Then he started showing me exactly how he goes down on a girl, opening his mouth and moving his tongue, he was like "and I go right to left like this." Oh my god I couldn't keep it in I absolutely burst into laughter!

kassie
05-27-2014, 04:17 PM
I’m seriously loving this thread

To: Mr. 20 year old “pre-med student”
Why do you feel the need to tell me “what are you on?” “I can tell you are on something because you’re wired” “don’t lie to me, I’m in pre-med and I can tell you’re on something”.

Oh really? That’s so cool! Have you taken any anatomy and physiology courses yet, with cadaver? If so, pop quiz! Name one muscle that is innervated by the cranial nerve…

While I watch you slink back, you reply “I’m only in my second year”; I caught on to your bullshit. Now as I remind you that you don’t primarily learn drug symptoms in pre-med classes, you actually learn them in psychology courses; you have a STUPID written across your forehead.

Listen up you wanna-be genius, just because we’re strippers, don’t mean we are stupid. If you are going to pretend to be a genius, at least be able to back it up. Now you look ridiculous and worse part is your friend actually had the pleasure to witness it all and you better believe he’s going to tell everyone about it.

You got what was coming and what you deserved. Now you’re embarrassed and stupid while I’m feeling great for putting another twat like you in his place; exactly the opposite of what you were trying to accomplish.

PS. I wasn’t on anything so fuck you for trying to put me on the spot that way. You tried to throw me a ball but instead you threw a boomerang and it came back and hit you right on your head.

starlily
05-28-2014, 06:40 AM
I hate the "what are you on" customers. I'm a stripper so I must constantly be on drugs right?! And don't fucking say "I can tell you're high because your pupils are huge." If you were as smart as you think you are, you'd know that pupils dilate in dim lighting.

Selina M
07-23-2014, 12:26 PM
I need to revive this thread.

Dear "Oh, You're Such A Tease!" customers,

THAT'S THE POINT OF A LAP DANCE/ STRIP CLUB. I am not a machine you rub your junk on to get off. I am not going to jack you off/blow you/fuck you. If you want to get your rocks off, go get a prostitute.

mia_fey
07-23-2014, 06:36 PM
These are great.

Dear Customer that Spotted Me in Civilian Clothes at the Mall,

I get that you're shopping with your lady and she probably doesn't know that you go to the club. I'm not happy to see you either. So please don't make a big deal out of hiding from me as I have no intentions of talking to you outside of work ever and you just made a huge ass out of yourself and now made yourself look suspect for no reason.

Sincerely,
I'm here to buy makeup

mia_fey
07-23-2014, 06:46 PM
Oooh and the reverse of that.

Dear Customer that is Happy to Spot Me Outside of Work,

GO AWAY! I don't want to see you either!

Sincerely,
I just want to shop in peace

simone87
07-23-2014, 08:59 PM
^ i hate that! especially when i'm out with my child, you're really gonna walk up to me and start talking about how you saw me at the strip club??

SexedUpCat
07-24-2014, 12:22 AM
Dear drunk ass customer pretending to not know English,

I heard you fucking speaking it two seconds ago, so don't come up to me on stage and grab my boob and act all confused when I take your hand off. No, taking your hand off did NOT mean you could then rub my kitty, and no way in hell will I "go to back room to make boom boom" with you. Get your broke ass away from my stage before you let other customers think they can touch or get a free show.

Sincerely,
You can't even afford to -dream- of making boom boom with me

kassie
08-13-2014, 09:58 PM
To the customers who state " I'm going to be a good boy tonight", get the fuck out the strip club then and no I will not see your cheap disgraceful ass outside of the club. Gosh you get on my damn nerves I wish I could lift you up and throw you out of the club myself. You make me contemplate homicide.

PS: in the strip club world, I'm gonna be a good boy tonight is translation for " I'm a broke loser". We see right though that. I know damn well that if I offered you a free VIP, you would jump on that chance in a heartbeat. You can be a good boy outside of our workplace.

DorienG
08-16-2014, 02:07 AM
Dear Customer who thinks it's cute to call me "Thickums",
I'm not "thick" with "meat on my bones"! I am a fucking size 3 110 llbs! The only reason I look thick is because the other dancer is 80 llbs dripping wet!! If I do have anything on me it's muscle from BUSTING MY FUCKING ASS FOR 3 YEARS! Get it right!

Thick??! Seriously?? Dude must be into skeletors!
(Sorry, thread jack)

DorienG
08-16-2014, 02:37 AM
Dear Geeky Middle Aged Passive-Agressive Alcoholic Albino 9-5 Guy- Yes, I know you've bought many dances from me in the past and that's cool. You were never grabby, bought me a drink or two, but I did listen to a lot of whiny, boring stuff you had to say while having off- putting breath and sweat stains on your shirt. A while back I approached you but you were busy, then after you were done , you had no funds. Ok, I get that.

Fast forward to earlier today: You trot across the club to catch up with me and talk. We chat , but you quickly apologize that you can't buy dances because you're leaving. Ok, I hadn't asked you yet. Obviously, you knew you weren't buying before as you were walking up to me. However, you start to tell me whats going on with your pathetic life and your dwindling health. Guess what?? I. Don't. Give. A. Fuck.! You're not paying me now. I don't want to hear it if you're not paying me! (Actually, I don't want to hear your shit period.) Drink yourself to death for all I care. Also, use a mint every now and then. And stop sweating so much. You smell.

Sincerely,

I'm Not You're Fucking Therapist

tempest666
08-16-2014, 03:59 AM
Dear elderly pervs,
Please wear underwear underneath your golf shorts. -_-

SkyeSabrina
09-01-2014, 11:03 AM
Dear annoying dudebro from work last night,
quit throwing a fit when I don't spend time with you at my job for free. You had barely given me any money, why on Earth would I spend the last few hours of my shift talking to you for a measly five dollars? I don't care if your parents are rich or what nice cars they drive because you obviously have no place in the club, with your broke ass. I even offered to take you to the VIP room multiple times and you said no. And yet you still have the audacity to find me on Facebook through a friend's profile and send me a message about how upset I made you and how you almost cried at the club, that I must not have liked you after all since I was *gasp* actually walking around selling dances and doing stages and well, doing MY JOB.... And it's also NOT my job to pretend that I like you or spend time with you if you aren't supporting me monetarily. I'm not 'too expensive' as you so rudely stated last night, your ass just can't afford me. The strip club is not a dating site. It is not a charity. And you're not so incredibly good looking that you're getting shit for free.
PS No, strippers do NOT accept Visa gift cards as payment for VIP rooms, but thank you for insulting my intelligence by thinking I was dumb enough to fall for that shit.

wednesday86
09-01-2014, 04:18 PM
Dear Pervert McGrayBalls,

If you're going to spend the entire dance trying to suck my tits and then dry humping me like a dog when I turn my back to you, you could at least tip at the end. I saw how much cash you had. I hope you enjoyed being completely ignored by all the dancers after I told them what a creep + cheap ass you are. :)

tempest666
09-01-2014, 09:33 PM
Dear Pervert McGrayBalls,

If you're going to spend the entire dance trying to suck my tits and then dry humping me like a dog when I turn my back to you, you could at least tip at the end. I saw how much cash you had. I hope you enjoyed being completely ignored by all the dancers after I told them what a creep + cheap ass you are. :)

Omg lmao! I'm sorry you had to deal with this but I fell off the couch laughing at the nickname! So using this! I'll give you credit on fb!

wednesday86
09-02-2014, 09:12 AM
Lol I'm glad you liked it! I actually busted out laughing during that dance because it was so ridiculous. Old farts need to stop taking Viagra and just stay home.

wednesday86
09-02-2014, 09:29 AM
Dear Fugly that brags about making $15/hr and won't buy a dance after you've chatted me up for 10 minutes,

Woooow $15 an HOUR! That's amazing! You must be rich! Sorry if it looked like I was trying to keep from laughing..It's just because I was trying to keep from laughing. You see...I make twice what you make per hour in three minutes. On a slow night I make roughly $50 an hour. On a good night it's closer to $100 an hour. And you don't need to tell me to "not take it personally" that you don't want a LD from me. Trust me, honey, I don't. We both know you would shit yourself if I even talked to your ugly fat ass in any other setting. At least I don't have to try to work around your beer gut. Do you have any idea how hard it is to give a lap dance to a dude with NO lap? Haha

Sincerely,
TakeYourBrokeAssHOME

Aniela
09-02-2014, 07:10 PM
At least I don't have to try to work around your beer gut. Do you have any idea how hard it is to give a lap dance to a dude with NO lap?

Totally stealing this. :rotfl:

Selina M
09-02-2014, 07:32 PM
Dear everyone in the club today,

To quote Fergie, "If you ain't got no money, take your broke ass HOME!"

Sincerely, pissed off stripper who made $33 today


(Yeah Wednesday, I was reminded of that song by your post and it fit :D )

wednesday86
09-02-2014, 07:51 PM
^^My bestie at my first club used to always dance to that song when guys were cheap asses and we would sing it to them. Lol! Dang girl $33!! Frickin jerks! I'd be pissed too! I remember one day I made $10 because it was nothing but broke asses and I told so many guys off I'm surprised I didn't get in trouble. I think every club should have a rule that if "customers" don't buy at least one dance they cannot stay.

kirakonstantin
09-02-2014, 08:45 PM
To all the wannabe pimps:

First, if you want a potential ho to take you seriously, dress better than a ratty ass pair of fake FUBU jeans, Jordan's so old i can see your socks, etc. Also, shouting from the parking lot that your pockets are empty... that means you suck as a pimp. Bringing Crackhead and Methmouth, dressed worse than you... not working. The kicker was how you talked about how much money you could make off me. See... I already make bank and I don't have to share it with your smelly crackpocked self.

P.S. My pussy was drier than the desert we live in, thanks to you.

Dear new regular,

Thank you for being an incredible gentleman and treating me with so much respect. Thanks for considering that I might want a break after 30 minutes and giving me a sealed bottle of water when I returned from the restroom. Thank you for keeping the interaction professional, asking when I usually work, rather than if I'll go out with you. I wish every customer was as awesome!

SexxiLexxi
09-02-2014, 09:52 PM
Dear Nasty Fuck,

I do NOT care if your girlfriend slept with your step mom. I do NOT care if they had a threesome with your uncle. And I sure as fuck do NOT give a rats ass about how you feel about it! Take that nasty shit elsewhere especially if you ARE NOT paying me to read that fuckshit on my screen!

Sincerely,
Epically Grossed Out WebCamGirl

Graci
09-11-2014, 09:48 PM
Dear Asswipes who think it's funny or cute to joke about raping me,

It's not funny. I work in an industry where an extraordinary number of women are raped or abused, and whose profession ensures they will have no chance of justice. I spend my whole shift constantly on guard.

Telling me you drugged my drink, or saying if you bought a lap dance you would end up shoving me against the wall and 'pounding my ass' isn't funny, and it's not a compliment.

Fuck you,

The stripper who walked away from you

Aniela
09-11-2014, 09:55 PM
This ^^^^ is making me wish we could print out a bunch of these letters, each on their own group of cards. Keep them in a little file cabinet type thing in the DR so we can tell the customer 'I have smtg b4 you go! *big sweet grin*' run back, grab the appropriate card & send them out the door w/ it.

wednesday86
09-16-2014, 05:59 PM
Dear King of the Timewasters,
I was surprised you didn't remember me from last week. I distinctly remembered you asking me to sit and talk to you for THIRTY MINUTES, promising that we would do a half hour CR every time I tried to escape. I listened to you whine about your ex wife cheating on you, your struggles with weight loss and diabetes and god knows what else. I started tuning you out after about 5 minutes because you're boring as fuck. Anyway, when it was time for my stage set you promised we would go to the CR as soon as I was done. Then I went on stage and you disappeared.
Last night you appeared at my tip rail and didn't remember who I was...but I played along and went to sit with you like you asked. I told you I would require a shot, a screwdriver, a burger and some buffalo wings. You obliged. After you paid the server I told you "I had to go to the bathroom." I let the other (3) girls know about you so that they could avoid you. We look out for each other like that. :) then I chatted and did dances with 4 other guys in your line of vision while you sat by yourself with my food and drinks!
You see Douchebag, nothing offends me more than my time being wasted. Who knows how much money I lost that night because of you. Yes, maybe it was naïve of me to trust that you would do the CR...but in my 3 years of dancing I've NEVER had a custy promise CRs and not deliver. You're the first!

I saw that you left after about half an hour of being completely ignored by the dancers and wait staff. Hopefully you will never return...Goodbye and good riddance. :)

Wednesday xx

tempest666
09-16-2014, 06:31 PM
Dear Awesome guy from NYC,
Thanks for the dances, the conversation and how nicely you treated all of my friends.

SkyeSabrina
09-16-2014, 07:54 PM
Dear guy from South Africa that comes in twice a week and stares at me from the bar all night,
I know you come in here to talk to me, and I know that you enjoy my company enough to have given me your number. That being said, I don't want to go out to coffee and talk about dystopian literature with you. I just want you to buy a fucking VIP room off of me instead of acting like I'm 'too good to do that'. I'm at work. Pay me and stop trying to play Captain SaveAHo. Quite complicating this for both of us and just buy a VIP, you know you want to and it's the closest thing you'll ever get to a date with me.
PS if you show me any more pictures of giraffes or antelope on your parents land or talk about your family money like it's going to help you get in my pants one more time, I think I might gag. You've made it fairly obvious that you have money and very apparent that you have no intention of spending much on me. Buh-bye.

Graci
09-18-2014, 05:49 PM
Dear ass who said you would buy a spa when you got paid at midnight,

I'm glad I didn't waste an hour with you waiting for your pay to come through. At midnight when you waved at me to leave the side of a paying customer, it was just to ask for my phone number, and tell me you want to be my boyfriend.

In your dreams, loser.

Dear ass who thinks I'm "too good for this",

Apparently I'm too good to accomplish my goals in life and make a lot of money while doing it, but I'm not too good to be your housewife out in the middle of nowhere.

If you think telling customers not to tip me, because "this isn't the right life" for me is charming, you are dead wrong.

wednesday86
09-19-2014, 10:42 AM
Dear Dumbass,

What do you expect me to say when you tell me "I don't normally get dances...but when I do I need the girl to really convince me."
I'm tired, my feet are killing me, I've had a terrible night and all I want to do is go home and sleep. Are you really trying that 'hard to get' shit with me?
The look on your face was priceless when I told you that I don't have the patience for that, and honestly, I really don't want to go home reeking of whatever Walmart brand cologne you're wearing...so just forget it.
You're not worth the trouble. I hope you tried that line on a few other girls after I left and got your ass kicked. I don't think anyone was in the mood for that bullshit last night.

tempest666
09-19-2014, 02:19 PM
Dear "Dancing man",
You need a better lipstick. Last night it was all over your teeth. By the way, you have better toenails than me. ;)
Luvs,
Tittylicious

LuvlyDancer
09-19-2014, 05:50 PM
Dear Customer I Assaulted,

I remember you fondly after all these years. Ten years, to be exact. I recall how you poked my ass hole when I bent over, and the rage that spread all through me in the following 30 seconds.

How stupid of you. You were seated, and I was standing up. That made it sooo easy to punch you in your stupid f*cking pervert face.

I had never hit a man before. At first, I didn't know that I had hurt you. I was screaming "Gimme $20 you piece of shit". You may not have noticed the shooter-girl, she had been walking over to us; eyes wide in disbelief, she abruptly turned and walked away.

Thank you for paying me for the song. I went up to the dressing room to reflect on my miserable life, only to be summoned by the bouncer. "This guy wants to call the police, you need to go say sorry."

When me and the bouncer found you, your fat old idiot golf buddies looked extremely uncomfortable. I'm sure they realized you did something completely fuck*d up to get a bloody eye, from a girl, in a stripclub.

You sounded so pathetic and stupid, I can still hear your voice after all these years: "I think you broke my eye".

There is no such thing as a broken eye.

I'm still not sorry, like I told you that night.

Also the coat check girl told me you forgot your coat. And never went back to find it.

Burn in hell you bastard mother-fuker.

kassie
09-19-2014, 06:54 PM
Dear the stinky guy I avoid.

I know you have an ostomy bag I smelled it on you during our 15 minute VIP. I'm sorry I cannot stomach dancing for you anymore. You disgust me in a way that money can't make up for. Please stop coming in the days I work. I know it's not a coincidence considering the dancers schedule gets posted online weekly. You are ruining my hustle because every time I make my rounds and see you I have to turn the other way; thus I can't approach the customers nearby you.

Remember when I approached you and you asked me to wait for you while you went to the bathroom so we can go to the VIP and when you went out I was long gone? Yes about that I approached you by accident and was only trying to be polite but I took the opportunity that you was away to escape. This happened a couple of times luckily I got smarter in avoiding you altogether. And stop moving around in hopes to "run into me" cuz I sure as hell ain't falling for that one again.

It's been a couple of months and till this day you still come the days I work. Get the hint already.

Graci
09-20-2014, 11:04 AM
Dear I feel bad I've forgotten your name,

You were the perfect customer. Respectful, charming, and most importantly you tipped generously for my time.

Thank you

KikiGem
09-23-2014, 06:32 PM
To customers:

Dear Assholes,

Cough up the cash or GTFO. If you don't tip, especially after a piddly ass 5 minute dance, I just might snap and stab everyone in this club.

Dear White Trash Princesses (AKA the bitches in my club)

SHUT THE FUCK UP.

kassie
11-14-2014, 06:06 PM
To the guys posting rude comments on stripclublist, tuscl etc...

Why don't you come say that shit to my face?

tempest666
11-14-2014, 06:10 PM
Dear random customer,
No you cannot kiss me on the cheek for $5. That's just creepy and weird.

LimaRitz
11-14-2014, 09:09 PM
Dear White or those of more European decedent customers who have afro-fetishes,

It is not ok!...

1.) To call me any other name but my stage name:::: I don't want to hear "Coco, Mocha, Nubian queen, Sally (yeah as in Pres. Jefferson's beloved black mistress/ baby-mama of his 16 slave kids), Beyonce (as if i look like her...please find more references and I look more like Jada Pinkett if you're gona go there), Foxxy, Sasha, Shaniqua, Jungle-love, Dark Paradise, Cleopatra, Ms.Brown, Ms.Peaches, Black-love, Oreo cookie, Molasses "::::: Respect my stage name....and some of these pet names are flat out racist.

2.) To touch my fucking hair:::: I got it. Its curly, it's long, it's thick, it smells like hibiscus and coconuts, BUT not only are you not allowed to touch me in this place you can't think that, that rule doesn't extend to my hair since it's apart of me... you also can't touch it because instead of a pat I get finger combed....what!? you just fucked up my defined curl pattern and made it frizzy::::I'm not a science exhibit for curious white people! believe it or not I can function with the hair that grows on my head so long as it's untouched because even though it still may appear to be "wild" or "bedhead-like" it took me at least an hour maybe more to get it this way..try asking to touch it.

3.) To call me exceptional::::I understand that maybe you're caught off guard that I'm well spoken and can talk about intellectual topics because I'm a dancer (Still wrong but i'll at least give them that) but so to say that you're astonished because I'm a black dancer is twice the wrong. Does it really blow your mind that I can read and write like wtf is this an reenactment of Django at the dinner table with Calvin Candy? Did you really just call me an exceptional-negro? A fucking african american is running this country I would of thought the standard for black people would be alot higher than that in the 19th century.::::stop with prejudices it's fucking pathetic because that makes you easily impressed

4.) To relay your sexual history involving women of color or lack there of:::: you telling me this means nothing. we are not about to fuck so how closer are you to your 1st interracial sexual experience from throwing a dollar? how does the fact that you've been with women of color make me feels more comfortable with you?...it's a dance.::::too personal i dont want to hear sexual history how about letting me know if you ever tipped a woman of color because that's more relevant.

5.) To refer to slavery:::: it's not Jefferson times my man so you can't assume I'm ok with being your mistress because "Becky or Kattie" (yes that's racist, my bad) at home ain't fulfilling your needs and you wish you can "go back in time" (-_-) like damn it's just a dance. Just make me think sometimes do I really be putting mother fucker in a spell with my ass soooo much that they say fuck it I need to own this bitch where's my time machine?:::: owning another person is wrong stop joking about it

**** On the Opposite end....Men of color dont do this to white women!!!

~*SwanPrincess*~
11-15-2014, 08:09 AM
Dear guys who call ME over and then don't do anything,

Don't stop me when I'm walking by you. Don't tell a waitress/dancer/friend to have me come over to you. Don't tell me to come see you after Im done with my stage set.
When you do any of these things I am going to assume you want a dance or VIP.
Im not at the strip club decked out in full hair and makeup, wearing a sexy outfit and working my ass off for your amusement. Don't expect me to answer your nosy questions, have a drink with you, or "chill" with you for FREE. No, I'm not a bitch, I am trying to WORK!!!!

Prettyglitter
11-15-2014, 08:26 AM
Yes you can put money in my thong. No you cannot try to slip and touch my vagina while you're at it.

Why thank you for coming to the stage with a dollar in your hand, why are you making me do the most for this dollar?

Oh hello. I see you kindly sat at the tiprail. It's very cute that you are acting as if you don't see me... And trying to not make eye contact. I guess neither one of us knows why you're at this tip rail.

Oh... I'm too good for this place. Thank you! Thank you for also asking for cheap extras. :)

Selina M
11-18-2014, 09:27 PM
Dear Old Man Who Complimented My Boobs,

You are old enough to be my grandfather, so while it would normally be creepy for you to compliment my tits/ass/legs, I am a stripper and you are in a strip club so it's acceptable. HOWEVER, if you want to ask personal questions like "Where did I go to high school", that makes it weird again... because you're A) reminding me of your age, and B) putting yourself in stalker-question-territory.


Dear Everyone Else Who Asks Personal Questions,

Asking me where I live/how much I make/my hobbies is not "small talk". Small talk is about the weather, or the college sports team, etc. While I appreciate you maybe possibly taking a genuine interest in me.... it's very annoying and feels like an interrogation. It is especially irksome when I try to turn the convo back to you (since you are obviously here to feel special and get attention from women) and you cut across to continue forcefully asking me questions.

Please shut up, objectify me and give me your money instead

Sincerely,
This Is Still A Business Transaction

wednesday86
11-18-2014, 10:06 PM
Dear Old Man Who Complimented My Boobs,

You are old enough to be my grandfather, so while it would normally be creepy for you to compliment my tits/ass/legs, I am a stripper and you are in a strip club so it's acceptable. HOWEVER, if you want to ask personal questions like "Where did I go to high school", that makes it weird again... because you're A) reminding me of your age, and B) putting yourself in stalker-question-territory.


Dear Everyone Else Who Asks Personal Questions,

Asking me where I live/how much I make/my hobbies is not "small talk". Small talk is about the weather, or the college sports team, etc. While I appreciate you maybe possibly taking a genuine interest in me.... it's very annoying and feels like an interrogation. It is especially irksome when I try to turn the convo back to you (since you are obviously here to feel special and get attention from women) and you cut across to continue forcefully asking me questions.

Please shut up, objectify me and give me your money instead

Sincerely,
This Is Still A Business Transaction

Omg girl, I was just going to post something similar on this thread today! I just got home from work and holy shit it must be National Interrogate a Stripper Day. I swear to god and jesus I heard the same 10 questions over and over and over again..."How long have you worked here?/Where are you from?/How old are you?/WHAT'S YOUR REAL NAME (like 5x which almost never happens to me)/Where did you grow up?" and a bunch of other ANNOYING questions...Like shut the fuck up and get a goddamn dance already. I'm not here to tell you my life story and it's none of your fucking business.

Selina M
11-19-2014, 12:10 AM
^ Gah, yes, today was full of time wasters of that ilk. I got snappy at the old man who followed up his high school question with "what's the most you've ever made off one guy". He then got pissy at me, "that's not a personal question". What-EV-er, dude.

I think some of them just do NOT want to give up control of the situation so they insist on "running" the conversation. They're just terrified we'll take their money xD

wednesday86
11-19-2014, 08:50 AM
Yep usually when they start playing 20 questions they don't get dances...They just want to see how long they can get you to talk for free. It's so fucking annoying. After a while last night I just started giving smart ass answers. One guy was like "do you have kids?" and I said "Yeah I have 9 kids." Another asked me that and I said "Not yet, why do you want to have one with me?" I hate that question most of all. I do not want to talk about my family especially my CHILD to some pervert in a strip club. It's so rude to even ask about that. Oh, my other personal favorite "So you have a boyfriend in jail?" Yep. And I smoke meth and I have 15 different baby daddies. *eye roll*

Graci
12-11-2014, 10:54 PM
Dear Creep,

You'll never know how much of a douche I think you are, and how hard I hustled you last night. Giggling through your cheesy pick up lines and smiling as you told me you were teaching your friends how to pick up chicks was the hardest thing I've ever done. Paying attention while you told me about your "bitch ex wife" was almost impossible. Pretending to be turned on by your disgusting talk about eating me out made me want to puke.

You emptied your wallet on me. I made you feel good for a night. That's my job.

I don't know what you were hoping to accomplish by waiting for me outside the club, when I had already told you I wasn't going to go home with you, but I hope the horrified look on my face as I ran to the closest cab and we sped away was enough to let you know you should never come near me again.

kirakonstantin
12-12-2014, 01:29 PM
Dear blowjob seeking asshole,

When I poured a drink on you a few weeks ago, when you insulted me because I wouldn't give you a blowjob, I thought I made my feelings pretty clear. Why did you think it was a good idea to try to to me onstage? Yes, I ignored you and will continue to do so because you're really old and I'd feel bad about hitting you. Complaining to the manager didn't help. In fact, he didn't say a word to me about it.

Dear fake accent guys,

When I speak Russian to you, because you demand that I'm faking it (because no Russians have EVER left Russia,) don't repeat any words you may have picked up. They're not polite and, saying "You're a disease infected tweaker dumbfuck" is probably going to get you killed eventually.

Miss_Red
12-12-2014, 01:56 PM
Dear men who want to see/fuck me OTC,

First of all, no. No, I won't, not ever, there's not enough money in the WORLD for that to happen, fuck yourself. You've got the wrong girl.

But for a second, let's forget about that. Let's say I WAS that kind of girl. If you can't shell out $20 for a lap dance, why in the HELL would I go home with your broke ass? Oh, you have money at home. Based on my data gathered as a stripper, every cheap-ass in my city has piles of cash sitting around in their shitty apartment building. No one in this club is going home with you. GTFO.

Sincerely,
Not a prostitute

kassie
12-12-2014, 02:22 PM
Yep usually when they start playing 20 questions they don't get dances...They just want to see how long they can get you to talk for free. It's so fucking annoying. After a while last night I just started giving smart ass answers. One guy was like "do you have kids?" and I said "Yeah I have 9 kids." Another asked me that and I said "Not yet, why do you want to have one with me?" I hate that question most of all. I do not want to talk about my family especially my CHILD to some pervert in a strip club. It's so rude to even ask about that. Oh, my other personal favorite "So you have a boyfriend in jail?" Yep. And I smoke meth and I have 15 different baby daddies. *eye roll*

I call these guys stallers. I catch on to it in a matter of seconds, tell them they are stalling me and walk away while their in mid-sentence. Boy bye!