View Full Version : The 'Sick Girls' Camming Club
JaneBurgess
09-24-2014, 06:42 PM
I have PTSD with anxiety, panic attacks and OCD. Have you tried sites where you can opt out of free chat?
Who here has PTSD?? god it's so hard trying to do cam shows or even talk to men when you have PTSD due to men.. .. yes I was officially diagnosed by a psychiatrist to appease the masses .. lol... but yea.. I think that's the hardest thing for me to do this.. every lil nuance and bullshit triggers me.. maybe I should dance around and tell them I don't like chitchat like you do JAC....lol... cuz they bring me to tears most days.
anonymous camgirl
09-24-2014, 07:05 PM
^^ Yea I do lots of sites that don't have free chat, but they aren't money makers per se...
SweetJulia
09-24-2014, 07:29 PM
^I have PTSD after a rape at 14 and one at 19.
SweetJulia
09-25-2014, 05:27 AM
Awesome, got my period early. Painful as fuck and at least I can keep water down today, unlike yesterday, when I had to resort to, um, less than traditional way to take pain meds. Day damn two, everyone, day damn two.
Berry
09-25-2014, 06:25 AM
Okay! I'm posting because I want to read this entire thread and because i belong here!!!! I'm going blind (it's so hard to put on makeup!) I can't afford contact lenses yet to even see if they work! I have a few disabilities I don't want to mention at the moment because it probably requires a lot of typing and im in a hurry! ;/ ... My teeth are super bad right now so camming is super hard! I'm constantly trying not to show teeth, smile with mouth closed, no talking!!! ugh. plus my back kills! hm, crazy headaches and migraines, severe muscle spasms... PTSD, social anxiety, anxiety attacks, horrific living conditions, also, ive lost my voice for some reason, probably muscle spasms. I sound like a really old frog who smokes a lot!!!!! (so no talking) I'm also severely underweight and malnourished at this time, it's been this way since before 2009. or well it's been getting worse, in general.... anyways, love you all and so happy to see this thread!!!!! :)
justanothercamgirl
09-25-2014, 01:19 PM
I was too sick to make it to my scheduled doctor's appointment this morning. That is never a good sign. :/
http://media.giphy.com/media/bPEzqPWRVZKpO/giphy.gif
JaneBurgess
09-25-2014, 06:01 PM
I wish my period would just start. Its been 5 days of severe PMS and I swear I have PMDD or whatever thats callled.
sweetgapeach
09-26-2014, 04:56 AM
I just wanted to give the largest thank you to anonymous camgirl!! You literally saved me yesterday. I have not had any success with my hands healing yet and the doctors keep adding more and more medicine. I am now on a pill to help with the itch of the hands called Hydroxyzine and another pill called Methotextrate (horribly dangerous chemotherapy pill). Anyway the combination of the two had me AWFULLY constipated for some days. But I cant take laxatives. In a hurry to provide myself relief yesterday I tried an enema. IMMEDIATELY began to vomit like crazy. No bathroom usage though. So I read your post about the coconut oil. I did not have the money for the herbal remedies, like I said STUPIDLY behind on my rent and about to lose our house. So I just melted the coconut oil and drunk about four tablespoons. I woke up to relief this morning, used the bathroom ALOT!! Thank you, in my mind you saved me this morning!!
justanothercamgirl
09-26-2014, 05:33 AM
http://media.giphy.com/media/48c6Ky52T6HcI/giphy.gif
anonymous camgirl
09-26-2014, 06:35 AM
Wow! thanks.. finally someone listens to me around here haha.. j/k.. I didn't know you would poop though?? I am doing it for liver flushing.. I hope you are not melting it in the microwave though... What I do is heat up water in the micro and then I stick the jar of coconut oil in the mug of hot water and stir.. and then I add my juice and drink with the straw because it solidifies to fast...lol.. and the liver/gb tonic!... but if you wanna poop a very quick fix is magnesium citrate at the grocery store or drug store and it's cheap!
p.s. what I mean by jar is I use a mason jar with the amount of coconut oil I want.. NOT the actual jar of coconut oil and make sure it's EXTRA VIRGIN organic good stuff!
I just wanted to give the largest thank you to anonymous camgirl!! You literally saved me yesterday. I have not had any success with my hands healing yet and the doctors keep adding more and more medicine. I am now on a pill to help with the itch of the hands called Hydroxyzine and another pill called Methotextrate (horribly dangerous chemotherapy pill). Anyway the combination of the two had me AWFULLY constipated for some days. But I cant take laxatives. In a hurry to provide myself relief yesterday I tried an enema. IMMEDIATELY began to vomit like crazy. No bathroom usage though. So I read your post about the coconut oil. I did not have the money for the herbal remedies, like I said STUPIDLY behind on my rent and about to lose our house. So I just melted the coconut oil and drunk about four tablespoons. I woke up to relief this morning, used the bathroom ALOT!! Thank you, in my mind you saved me this morning!!
sweetgapeach
09-26-2014, 06:44 AM
LOL, silly me, yeah it was the organic extra virgin, i mixed it with a little orange juice, it was cold juice so it solidified with the pulp, little crumbles...but I drank it. And pooped lots!! Cant do magnesium citrate, it goes against the medication that I am taking. But anyway, you helped me, even though I did it all wrong
JaneBurgess
09-26-2014, 11:37 PM
So my period finally started. Tonight, in a cam show. Yep that's the kind of luck I've had this week. :(
justanothercamgirl
09-27-2014, 09:48 AM
Meanwhile at JAC's apartment.....
*JAC wakes up exhausted and doesn't want to get out of bed*
JAC: I need to work.
JAC'S BRAIN: Sleep.
JAC: Seriously, I need to work.
JAC'S BRAIN: Sleeeeeeeeeeeep.
JAC: Fuck off brain, I need to work.
JAC'S BRAIN: Tell you what, if you just let me rest here with my eyes closed for 5 minutes then we will get up and work. That sounds like a fair deal, right?
JAC: Okay brain, as long as you promise me.
JAC'S BRAIN: I promise.
*JAC wakes up three hours later and has almost no time left to cam*
JAC: Dammit!
anonymous camgirl
09-27-2014, 10:00 AM
^^ LOL sounds familiar!.. I cannot get up at 5am to save my life these days.. been sleeping in til 7 or 8 am everyday uggh
Glamourmilf
09-28-2014, 09:46 AM
39113Taking some time off from camming, and I'm just doing PSO, because the mask is starting to come off, and guys can see how unhappy and sad I am.... Time to regroup, refresh, and restart my engine another day.
audritwo
09-28-2014, 11:54 AM
First thing is first, I AM NOT ANOREXIC. I do not have any eating disorder. I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.
My depression has been coming back with a vengeance. When I get in my little hole, I tend not to eat. I honestly believe I do not deserve food. My husband noticed that I haven't been eating or finishing meals. Usually I eat like a horse, I never pick and push my food around. I will go without meals then when I get too hungry, I'll finally eat. Usually this meal is in the evening when my husband is home where I can't hide it.
I recently came out to him about this. It's kinda embarrassing, almost 30 and I have to have my husband monitor my eating habits.
I don't feel fat, I don't think I need to lose weight at all. I'm perfectly happy with my body tone.
justanothercamgirl
09-28-2014, 12:17 PM
First thing is first, I AM NOT ANOREXIC. I do not have any eating disorder. I've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder.
My depression has been coming back with a vengeance. When I get in my little hole, I tend not to eat. I honestly believe I do not deserve food. My husband noticed that I haven't been eating or finishing meals. Usually I eat like a horse, I never pick and push my food around. I will go without meals then when I get too hungry, I'll finally eat. Usually this meal is in the evening when my husband is home where I can't hide it.
I recently came out to him about this. It's kinda embarrassing, almost 30 and I have to have my husband monitor my eating habits.
I don't feel fat, I don't think I need to lose weight at all. I'm perfectly happy with my body tone.
When I become depressed it is near impossible to get me to eat. I am just not interested in any way. My theory is that since the pleasure center of our brain is rewarded to get us to eat in the first place then if something is interrupting it from working (such as depression) that it would be completely natural to feel a disconnection to food or feel as if you don't deserve it.
anonymous camgirl
09-28-2014, 04:25 PM
I am sad to hear this, I went through a period of a few years where I couldn't smile.. it was absolutely physically impossible.. I tried... It's actually a physical thing to be so depleted you cannot smile.. I hope one day you can smile again.. I am sorry.. I think it's so hard for us old gals.. this is definitely a young woman's game.. us old ladies.. are disheartened, sad, disappointed.. physically or mentally ill.. it's a sad lot.. and so hard to keep up with..haha..
39113Taking some time off from camming, and I'm just doing PSO, because the mask is starting to come off, and guys can see how unhappy and sad I am.... Time to regroup, refresh, and restart my engine another day.
justanothercamgirl
09-29-2014, 04:46 AM
Stupid Red Dragon......bleeding like a stuck pig, exhaustion and cramps has me stuck in bed today. I might as well just try to work on clips because I am not going to get any camming done.
http://media2.giphy.com/media/OUryBN7dqHqMg/giphy.gif
SoloDesire
09-29-2014, 05:14 AM
^ Same here. I doubt I'll do much of anything today though...I don't even feel up to making clips :(
anonymous camgirl
09-29-2014, 07:33 AM
oh I just got off my period.. i'll carry the torch for ya guys while you recover...LOL
SweetJulia
09-29-2014, 07:43 AM
I am terrified to add up how much Tylenol I've taken over the weekend. I just know 4 grams in 24 hours is when it causes liver damage. My milk thistle came in, but my cramps are too bad for me to keep those huge gelcaps down. Ironic, huh?
justanothercamgirl
09-29-2014, 07:44 AM
oh I just got off my period.. i'll carry the torch for ya guys while you recover...LOL
https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/6511635712/hAD5A2321/
anonymous camgirl
09-29-2014, 07:59 AM
^^ LOL you are so funny!
If it wasn't for you girls, I would surely go INSANE!
SoloDesire
09-29-2014, 08:08 AM
^^ Ditto!! You ladies keep me going some days <3
Glamourmilf
09-29-2014, 08:12 AM
^^To answer your question from before, I also have P.T.S.D. I'm not going to say why here in an open forum, but only that I understand how You feel. 39119
anonymous camgirl
09-29-2014, 10:29 AM
Having PTSD.. is simply fucking exhausting.. I wish I could just relax.., speaking of nitemares I will often wake up out of a sound sleep for no reason whatsoever other than maybe I was dreaming that I am ALONE and will be forever...lol... Hypervigilance... yes always on alert ready to attack.. someone rings your doorbell... jump up and heart starts racing immediately... Something needs repair and breaks.. complete meltdown and anxiety.. NEED A DRINK to calm down.. I often have to talk to myself constantly and reassure myself it will be ok.. everything is going to be ok.. Just keep on doing what you are doing , stay on budget and calm down...LOL.. everything will work out. Well those are just a few of this insipidious disorder...
AliceFun
09-30-2014, 08:10 AM
Please, can u give me some input here ladies? On friday i need to go for a magnetic resonance/ scanner test for my back, the pain is unbearable for me by now, in case they'll have to inject me that contrast solution to see better, will that make me feel sick after? cause i just dont know if i should go alone or take my son with me but he is working & having classes and has to make some arrangements at work & uni to be able to come with me at hospital. And if that thing makes me feel sick, how long that will last, the sickness? Anyone who can relate pls? Thank you!
reversecowgirl
09-30-2014, 08:45 AM
Please, can u give me some input here ladies? On friday i need to go for a magnetic resonance/ scanner test for my back, the pain is unbearable for me by now, in case they'll have to inject me that contrast solution to see better, will that make me feel sick after? cause i just dont know if i should go alone or take my son with me but he is working & having classes and has to make some arrangements at work & uni to be able to come with me at hospital. And if that thing makes me feel sick, how long that will last, the sickness? Anyone who can relate pls? Thank you!
I've had this done. The dye doesn't cause anything. When they first inject it, you'll feel like you're peeing your pants, it's a weird warmth sensation but it's normal and the nurse will tell you that beforehand, and you don't actually pee or anything lol. No side effects at all from the dye tho. I hope you get relief very soon.
Glamourmilf
09-30-2014, 08:49 AM
Anon, I know exactly what You mean. I don't have any peace when I sleep, either, because I astral travel.. I always have. It started when I was a child, and the reason for having ptsd started then also,.. no coincidence there.
I've seen numerous Drs., sought out the therapy from numerous metaphysical practitioners, and nothing helps.
It has gotten worse since I started camming though, which worries me. only because I'm going to way darker places, and I'm scared that I won't come back.
A knock at my door, can send me through the roof with fear, and anxiety. That's why I try to do al home repaires myself, because having someone come in here, is torture for me as well.
kortneykay
09-30-2014, 10:18 AM
Hi ladies. I'm starting to get sick but I'm keeping it at bay and I'm working through it. I've been taking Emergen C and it's been working wonderfully. I also take a shot of dayquil when I have to, lol. I need $$$ a little more this month than usual as I'm moving in 3 weeks so my cold will just have to take a back seat :) Hope you are all doing well!
SweetJulia
09-30-2014, 10:42 AM
^I hope you're taking a multivitamin and washing your hands a bunch as well?
kortneykay
09-30-2014, 10:48 AM
No multivitamins yet but I do wash my hands religiously! :D So far I've only experienced stuffy nose and dry throat in the AM when I wake up. Once I drink my emergen c in a hot cup of tea, I'm fine for the rest of the day. I have been fine until this morning as I had a runny nose but that's about all. It's like on the brink of trying to take over but I'm keeping it at bay so far if that's possible, lol.
justanothercamgirl
09-30-2014, 11:38 AM
^I hope you're taking a multivitamin and washing your hands a bunch as well?
Emergen-C actually is a multi-vitamin.
caramelcraze
09-30-2014, 12:27 PM
Anyone else on lexapro and have 12 hour headaches as a side effect? I've been MIA for almost 2 weeks due to the change in medication and headaches. It's like 12 hours after I take it that I get one for 12 hours. ugh... I hate side effects.
JaneBurgess
09-30-2014, 05:23 PM
I had that with Paxil and it took about a month to actually start to feel better. I hope you feel better soon.
Anyone else on lexapro and have 12 hour headaches as a side effect? I've been MIA for almost 2 weeks due to the change in medication and headaches. It's like 12 hours after I take it that I get one for 12 hours. ugh... I hate side effects.
SweetJulia
10-01-2014, 08:41 AM
Eighth day of period. Yeah, you read that right. *Losing mind*
justanothercamgirl
10-01-2014, 08:56 AM
Dear Body,
I know you are super sick today but I *really* need you to work today. We just can't afford another day off if we would like keep from being homeless.
http://media.giphy.com/media/2mppNcumiCnZK/giphy.gif
You can do this! I have faith in you.
Love,
JAC
RoseWaits1983
10-01-2014, 10:32 AM
Does ADD count as an Illness? LOL I am totally kidding but I find it EXTREMELY hard to hang online for long periods of time especially when my ADD is at an all time high. Here are some tricks I try to implement when I am double camming or working 4+ hours straight.
* I don't drink any caffeine before my shift.
* I find something to keep my hands busy. Like a stress ball or play a background game that requires hand on mouse like online tetris etc.
* I talk to my free users more on days I am completely through the roof.
Just a couple of things I have tried. Anyone have any other suggestions?
anonymous camgirl
10-02-2014, 12:47 PM
I am so fucking depressed and sad .. I have been crying on and off trying to buck up today.. I feel like I can't do anything right .. I am not good at anything.. I am so frustrated that I cant make anything in this life work for me.. and why people are just so against me all the time.. NO really they are.. that's why I named myself anonymous camgirl because I didn't want anyone to hate me... I just want to be happy and it doesn't seem like i'll ever get it.. I feel so confined, frustrated, restricted and limited in this world... I am getting really tired and want to give up... I feel so alone and have no one to talk to.. just my 24 yr old son and he is sick of hearing about my camgirl problems or any other problems I have.
anonymous camgirl
10-02-2014, 03:02 PM
You know what I hate about PTSD?? .. first you get it from people abusing you etc etc etc.. and then you get triggered and start yelling at people or something and then you get in fucking trouble... It's a double whammy.. I can't ever promise I'll be a good girl forever.. you can't expect people to be that way.. not with PTSD.. .. It's so hard to control something that is mentally challenging such as this.. I cannot control it.. so hard for me .. I can't ever say I can behave all the time.. I just can't promise it.
MiaFaye
10-02-2014, 03:42 PM
I really need some motivation and support to get back on cam... I found out yesterday that a friend who also struggled with depression and eating disorders committed suicide in the early hours whilst on a psychiatric ward. It's shaken me quite a bit, I'm struggling to get out of bed, but I really need to in order to make rent. I'm £55 short, and have other financial responsibilities. I don't know what to do. This sucks.
anonymous camgirl
10-02-2014, 04:28 PM
I had a friend who committed suicide after she turned 40.. it was a year ago I think? 2012 or 13... I still cry for her .. ... I tried to commit suicide in 2010.. I spent 6 days at the psych ward.. and boy was I treated badly by everyone who knew.. I received no compassion and support... Only by my oldest sister .. everyone else was just mad at me and kicked me.. and I regret everyday so far that I am still alive..../.. now I know what people really think of me.. .. so I get it!..
Renton
10-02-2014, 11:52 PM
Having PTSD.. is simply fucking exhausting.. I wish I could just relax.., speaking of nitemares I will often wake up out of a sound sleep for no reason whatsoever other than maybe I was dreaming that I am ALONE and will be forever...lol... Hypervigilance... yes always on alert ready to attack.. someone rings your doorbell... jump up and heart starts racing immediately... Something needs repair and breaks.. complete meltdown and anxiety.. NEED A DRINK to calm down.. I often have to talk to myself constantly and reassure myself it will be ok.. everything is going to be ok.. Just keep on doing what you are doing , stay on budget and calm down...LOL.. everything will work out. Well those are just a few of this insipidious disorder...
I feel you <3 I have PTSD and rapid cycling Bipolar... so you can imagine how exhausting that can be :/ 2 days ago I was depressed, yesterday morning I was fine and by evening I was hypomanic. And then of course the nightmares from my PTSD and all of the other symptoms just trigger my moodswings. oh the joy -_-
AliceFun
10-03-2014, 12:48 AM
just my 24 yr old son and he is sick of hearing about my camgirl problems or any other problems I have.
I feel you & know how it is, they get tired of us unloading our problems on them, mine is the same but i cant help it myself, he's the only one i have to talk to, we sacrifice ourselves to raise & educate them on our own but we sometimes feel they dont appreciate & take everything we do for them for granted. I get soo pissed on him sometimes but i know is also difficult for them to handle all these situations & problems. My son has a job now so i am in a way relieved he brings some money in the house too, even the salary is not that much we can use the money for his uni fees or emergency situations. He even transferred to learning at distance classes this 2nd uni year because he wanna keep the job, i cant handle it all on my own already considering i have severe back problems/ pain that makes work very difficult for me. Good luck & dont give up, i hope one day us devoted moms will find our path & the right person for us, there is always hope.
justanothercamgirl
10-03-2014, 04:45 AM
I had a friend who committed suicide after she turned 40.. it was a year ago I think? 2012 or 13... I still cry for her .. ... I tried to commit suicide in 2010.. I spent 6 days at the psych ward.. and boy was I treated badly by everyone who knew.. I received no compassion and support... Only by my oldest sister .. everyone else was just mad at me and kicked me.. and I regret everyday so far that I am still alive..../.. now I know what people really think of me.. .. so I get it!..
http://media.giphy.com/media/Y6uhhPPB5DYT6/giphy.gif
justanothercamgirl
10-03-2014, 04:46 AM
I have to go to the doctor's in a few hours. I am so anxious about the appointment I hardly slept at all last night.
I truly hate when I am my own worse enemy and make things harder on myself then they have to be.
justanothercamgirl
10-03-2014, 04:50 AM
I really need some motivation and support to get back on cam... I found out yesterday that a friend who also struggled with depression and eating disorders committed suicide in the early hours whilst on a psychiatric ward. It's shaken me quite a bit, I'm struggling to get out of bed, but I really need to in order to make rent. I'm £55 short, and have other financial responsibilities. I don't know what to do. This sucks.
Just try to make it one breath at a time. We are here for you. <3
pinkpink
10-04-2014, 02:48 AM
The ugly beast depression has stolen weeks from me. Maybe even months. I just know that my earnings haven't been the same at all since I got bad news the last week of August. It took 10+ days to get back on cam and I never really found my groove again. Well, end of September came and something else bad happened (apartment flooded) and that threw me off for 2 days (legitimately) and then 7 days just because I haven't been coping with stress well. So now I'm standing at the crossroads of Fucked and You're Screwed. I feel like it's not a good thing to be such a desperate cam girl. No good can come of that. I don't really have any choice but to buck up and pull myself up from boot straps and shit. The other option? Hopelessness & despair. Well let's be real, I'm already there. I'm hopeful that I will get out of bed tomorrow and get on cam and try to make SOMETHING on SM before cutoff.
reversecowgirl
10-04-2014, 05:07 AM
Depression is a horribly ugly beast. I've been battling it since about June. It got to the point where I didn't give two shits about anything, I even closed both of my camming accounts. Now I have to start all over again, somewhere. I don't want to go back to iml or sm. Iml tanked for me after about 6 months, and I never did make shit on sm. I have to figure out how to get my head clear, and refresh/reboot. I don't get excited about anything anymore, I hardly ever get out of my pajamas, and I am confused because normally this is my favorite time of year with the weather getting cooler and the crisp fresh air. I'm stuck in this funky fog and I can't see the way out, and most days I'm too fucking tired to bother looking for a map.