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View Full Version : How to date a dancer a.k.a Why I prefer to date dancers over non-dancers.



James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 07:22 PM
First off, my background.

I've been a bouncer at several clubs and a bartender for a number of years. Because of that, I've known many dancers throughout the years and dated several and they are all wonderful women. Sometimes a little crazy, but always fun to spend time with.

Why I love strippers:

Strippers are so much more comfortable in their own skin. They don't play the victim. They know what they want and they are going to get it. They also don't have the hang-ups about sex that non-dancers girls have and they are so much fun to hang out with. Most of them are smart, motivated, well-educated and have well-developed opinions about the world.

In short, if you want to date a strong woman, go after a stripper. If you have a "daddy complex" that you need to be the power and the breadwinner, go find a shy girl.

Why I wrote this:

There are a ton of guys out there that are always trying to get a dancer as some sort of notch in their belt. Others feel they have a true connection with a girl. I give you my personal advice from someone who has had some success on this subject.

Warning:

This is a lot of work for the possibility of no reward. This is a long process and expect it to take several months as well. You have to establish and earn her trust amidst a sea of creeps and scumbags. Do not rush the process. If you're serious, you'll put in the time. If you're not, well then go play with Tindr.


Let's begin. First off:

Strippers are people too.

They have families, they have dreams and goals, they love, they get their heart broken and they like things much the same as other women who are not dancers. If you think that just because they take off their clothes for money; they are somehow less people. I will tell you straight up that you need to readjust your attitude. It's simple economics. They can make more in one night at a club than a month working at a restaurant or some 9-5's which allows them to better their life.

Strippers are hustlers:

A non-dancer has hang-ups about being naked, even around her boyfriend. A stripper on the other hand has hardened herself in ways you cannot imagine. She is quite comfortable being completely naked in front of people she has never seen before or will again. That being said, you're regular game is not going to work so well on her because she's heard it all before.

Strippers deal with creeps almost on an hourly basis:

For every guy that is respectful of the dancers, there are 30 more guys that are just trying to cop a cheap feel. When you first walk into a club, you are automatically labeled as a potential creep until you discern yourself. Advice: act normal. If you wouldn't say it in front of your grandmother, chances are that you shouldn't be saying it to her.

Strippers are there to make money:

This is a job to them. When you see a dancer at a club, do not expect that she's looking for a man to "save her". She's doing quite well on her own. If you want to date a stripper, you have to realize that she's probably dated a string of idiots that made her life miserable and wasted more of her time than he was worth. Advice: Be the fun guy, show up with a smile and a joke. Always be happy to see her, from day one. You will notice that you will stand out a lot more because the average SC customer is a miserable person who's just trying to see some free tit. Being the fun guy will also show that you're a normal person who enjoys the company of attractive women instead of coming off as being Ed Geins nerdy cousin.

Part of being a stripper is having a high confidence in their appearance:

Every stripper worth her weight in glitter believes that she is the hottest woman in the club. And why wouldn't she? She gets told she's beautiful about a thousand times a day. Saying she has a nice ass is pointless because she knows she has a nice ass. She makes her money from having a nice ass and hence your compliments are just another lame regurgitation in a long line of lame regurgitations.

Still they do like compliments, as does everyone. Compliment her on something that's unique about her. I have a large amount of tattoos so sometimes I'll make a comment about the intricacies of her tattoo work and how nice the work is. That doesn't come off as corny because I have detailed, large tattoos myself.

Make her laugh:

As I mentioned before, she's deals with a lot of creeps so it's a godsend when a regular fun guy says something funny. Being a dancer can be very stressful at times and many girls who've been dancing for long begin to develop a lower sense of self-worth from dealing with all the assholes that treat them like sex objects all the time.

Do not get dances from her at first:

I know I'm going to catch a lot of flack from this but because you are interested in her, you need to establish that you enjoy her more in the times that she's acting like a person, (ie: when she's chatting with you), by getting dances right off the bat, she's going to relegate you to "customer world" that you just like seeing her ass clap in your face than getting to know her as a person.

Be respectful and kind but only have eyes for her:

You are in a SC and the girls working have bills to pay. You will win no points by being a cheap ass with the bartender or the other dancers. However, the dancer you are after expects guys to stare at every square inch of free skin they can lay their eyes on. Make eye contact, tip and smile and go back to her. If you are talking to her at the bar and another dancer comes up, maintain eye contact with your interest but casually slide some money to the dancer like a subtle way of "I acknowledge you're working and here's a tip but I'm really interested in this woman I'm talking to."

Be good looking:

Life ain't fair but realize this, "Guys like cute girls and girls like cute guys." We all can't look like Brad Pitt but take care of yourself. Dress well, wear form flattering clothing, comb your hair and stop eating so many doughnuts. She's got her pick of the litter so you better make yourself a contender.

Make friends with everyone:

Becoming friendly with the bartender and some of the non-dancing staff can help you in many ways. Most importantly if you're friends with the staff, the chances are high that you will get invited out into the inner circle, the places where the staff hangs out after work or on off days. The more people that your interest works with that trust you, the easier the process is going to be.

Maintain an air of aloofness:

When you walk into the club, do not sprint immediately over to your interest, it's annoying and it makes you look like a creep. Instead, take a seat and watch the tv. If you are making an impression at all on your interest, she will seek you out. Smile, be happy to see her, make a little situational humor and if she's interested she'll sit down or say something like "I'm going up on stage, but I'll be back in a bit." Smile, say something like "Have fun" and go back to the tv. Advice: Always keep an air of take it or leave it. You're happy when she's there but you are by no means trying to control her.

Pass the shit tests:

One of the reasons I love strippers is because of their egos. They will bust your balls all time with such skill, you really have to stay on your toes. Even if you're not interested in dating a stripper, talking to them can really improve your game with non-dancers.

Dancers have a number of shit tests that they will pull out to see if you're the real deal and you need to be on your game when they do this. Do not EVER think that a dancer is dumber than you or that you've got her in the bag. Most dancers I know are very smart and have an intricate knowledge of how men think, (it's their job to know these things.) On top of that, she wants you to be a piece of shit. She wants you to be like every single other man she's ever met who was just all about the tits and ass and little else. She wants you to be a scumbag who's only gaming her for pussy. She wants any reason to blow you off.

What will she do to shit test you?

If you don't want a dance, she might call you gay. She'll purposely try to dance for other guys while you look at her to gauge your reaction and see if you get jealous. If you do get jealous, she's already won and she can string you along for as long as she wants. She might try hitting on you, then go cold to see if you start following her around like a little puppy dog and annoying her. Advice: Whatever she does, it's not important. If she tries to get a rise out of you, just smile and laugh it off. If she's dancing for someone near you while facing you, just look her in the eye, smile (fun smile, not creepo smile), and go back to watching tv.

Asking for her number:

You cannot ask for her number, she will have to give you hers when she feels the time is right. You have to make her basically throw herself at you over the course of time. You can speed up the process a little by inviting her to some public place, perhaps going to see the new movie you both said you're excited to see or even dumb stuff like playing mini-golf. Something that is so far removed from any romance, any hint of seduction or anything that might make her think you're trying to get her alone to possibly hurt her. (keep in mind that this is always in the back of a dancers head.) Basically you're looking to have normal fun with her. Stay away from a sit-down dinner at first, every weirdo is trying to do that and it's old. You're not looking to be her sugar daddy.

Once you have established outside contact: IE she has met you in a public place in her regular clothes:

Do not go back to the club. She knows your intentions, you have met the real person behind the dancer so that dancer is not her anymore and she is going to need some time to process whether she wants to spend more time with you or not. Again, the "take it or leave it" attitude is highly critical. You cannot text her 23 times a day then show up at her job. She is working and making her money and to show up is just going to put all your hard work on trying to become her boyfriend back into "Well that failed, let's go see her naked."

Do not ever become obsessed:

I'm sure you've all heard about Christy Mack and her royal douche of an ex beating her to a pulp. You must never get jealous of her or become obsessed with her life. Dating a stripper is lot a of work and it is not for the faint hearted. You have to have your shit together because your woman takes off her clothes and dances naked for men. If you can't handle that, then dating them is not for you.

Long term:

So you've successfully been dating your fantasy girl for a while. Now what?

Just because you are dating her, does not mean you own her. Do not tell her to stop dancing, do not harass her and FOR GOD'S SAKES, don't start thinking she's messing around behind your back. If she wants to she's going to and you are not going to stop her. In fact, you're going to push her away the more you try to control her.

I personally have never had a dancer girlfriend cheat on me because I made it a point to always be the fun guy who always made her laugh. If she's got someone in her life that makes her happy, she's going to fight like a caged animal to make sure nothing fucks that up. She'll become your Athena so don't abuse her trust.


Finally:

Don't cheat on a stripper:

Dancers are in very good shape and they are very territorial. My good friend was dating a very beautiful woman from a local club and she happened to find out that he was screwing around behind her back. She promptly picked up a cinder block and hurled it through the back window of his parked truck and the block came out of the windshield. Then she proceeded to stab his tires and physically punch the panels of his truck. She did over $12,000 of damage to his truck and basically totaled it with her bare hands.

Be straight with the dancer and break up with her in person after a long discussion. Don't lie to her.


Good Luck

Aniela
08-18-2014, 07:42 PM
I would file this author under 'Royally Full of Shit'. It's like what was mentioned in the Nice Guys thread in Pink. -- those who really are smtg, or really have done smtg, don't typically feel the need to broadcast it.

James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 07:43 PM
I don't categorize myself as 'a stripper' I categorize myself as a person. I would never be with anyone who constantly referred to me by my job title.

Btw I think you make a lot of generalizations. For instance um not all strippers are psychos and willing to ruin someone's truck....


I meant no disrespect referring to dancers as "strippers". I was simple looking for the easiest point of clarity and I would never argue that dancers are any different. It's a job, short and sweet and too many people have it in their head that just because a woman does that job, she is somehow less of a person and that's absolutely not true. Some of the most genuine women I know are dancers.

As far as the aggression part, I was simply pointing out that a dancer is an emotionally strong woman and you don't toy with a strong woman's heart. (and my friend totally deserved to have his truck ruined. He got what he deserved.)

James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 07:49 PM
I would file this author under 'Royally Full of Shit'. It's like what was mentioned in the Nice Guys thread in Pink. -- those who really are smtg, or really have done smtg, don't typically feel the need to broadcast it.

smtg? Sure I'm up to something, we're all up to something. Everyone has an agenda. My agenda? I hope some of these stalkers read this and maybe, just maybe my friends don't get harassed anymore at the club.

I spent a lot of time as a doorman. I'm by no means a "Nice Guy" or whatever the hell that is. I have my failings. I'm human.

I'm not surprised that the dancers reading this think I'm full of shit. A dancer's world is full of men who are full of shit. I know. I tossed many of them out the door in my day.

But as much shit as I may be full of, not one could argue that respecting a dancer and not treating her like a sex object would help. Hell, that's how I met my fiance.

But anyway, thanks for the reply. Much appreciated.

simone87
08-18-2014, 07:53 PM
ew, i think my skin just crawled a little bit. horrible advice, way too many ridiculous generalizations about ALL strippers being these glorious angelic hot sex kittens that play this "shit test" game * damn, why wasn't i notified about this test?*. oh god, my self worth is starting to disintegrate i need a guy to make me laugh lololol, well you just gave me a laugh thank you! i can feel my worth increasing by the minute

HallelujahHopkins
08-18-2014, 08:35 PM
How To Date a Stripper:

Ask out the sarcastic girl in the front row of you Chemistry lecture.

Have a blast bullshitting with the badass in your kickboxing class.

Make a play-date if your kids go to the same daycare or school.

Meet up with that eharmony lady.

Dance with that wild child at the rave.

Make conversation about your dogs when they entangle at the park.

Laugh with the messy haired/ no makeup/ sweatpants girl who's behind you at Starbucks or the grocery store.

Basically meet her anywhere but the place where she is forced to be a character- even when you think you know the 'real' woman. And then (boys this is the important part, so listen close) don't be a dick when she mentions her job. Rub her feet when she gets home. Don't expect her to feel so fucking confident about her body when she is constantly in competition and never good enough. When she's been sneered at and rejected, trash talked to, etc.

Saying you think strippers are stronger women is insulting to women- and it's really telling about what you think women should prioritize their struggles around-namely sexuality. Do you think the average woman is an insecure wet blanket who plays the victim- that your "shy girls" need a fucking Daddy? Should you become obsessed with and stalk your barista? Is it okay to cheat on that school teacher because she isn't "physically fit" enough to bust da windows out you car?

By your own logic if this ideal vixen is confident enough she'll ask you for your number if she wants it. BTW of all the guys I'd be likely to want to see OTC it's the one who sits with me in VIP, showing me my time is precious to them, who massages me, cuddles with me, who enjoys every moment they can get that I find attractive. That regular who comes in for hugs and chit-chat is a sad person, not very sexy at all.

Ash_kali
08-18-2014, 08:36 PM
Meh, I think it's nice he tried. At least it seems that he's got some respect which is always appreciated. If more of my customers were like that, I'd make a hell of a lot more money lol

James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 08:38 PM
Haha wow so much hate lol. Eh, it is what it is. Thanks for the comments.

James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 08:53 PM
ew, i think my skin just crawled a little bit. horrible advice, way too many ridiculous generalizations about ALL strippers being these glorious angelic hot sex kittens that play this "shit test" game * damn, why wasn't i notified about this test?*. oh god, my self worth is starting to disintegrate i need a guy to make me laugh lololol, well you just gave me a laugh thank you! i can feel my worth increasing by the minute

Wow, thank you so much for your compliments. I wasn't aware I was such a powerful speaker to elicit such a impassioned response. Maybe I should run for congress...

James_Jekyll
08-18-2014, 08:58 PM
How To Date a Stripper:

Ask out the sarcastic girl in the front row of you Chemistry lecture.

Have a blast bullshitting with the badass in your kickboxing class.

Make a play-date if your kids go to the same daycare or school.

Meet up with that eharmony lady.

Dance with that wild child at the rave.

Make conversation about your dogs when they entangle at the park.

Laugh with the messy haired/ no makeup/ sweatpants girl who's behind you at Starbucks or the grocery store.

Basically meet her anywhere but the place where she is forced to be a character- even when you think you know the 'real' woman. And then (boys this is the important part, so listen close) don't be a dick when she mentions her job. Rub her feet when she gets home. Don't expect her to feel so fucking confident about her body when she is constantly in competition and never good enough. When she's been sneered at and rejected, trash talked to, etc.

Saying you think strippers are stronger women is insulting to women- and it's really telling about what you think women should prioritize their struggles around-namely sexuality. Do you think the average woman is an insecure wet blanket who plays the victim- that your "shy girls" need a fucking Daddy? Should you become obsessed with and stalk your barista? Is it okay to cheat on that school teacher because she isn't "physically fit" enough to bust da windows out you car?

By your own logic if this ideal vixen is confident enough she'll ask you for your number if she wants it. BTW of all the guys I'd be likely to want to see OTC it's the one who sits with me in VIP, showing me my time is precious to them, who massages me, cuddles with me, who enjoys every moment they can get that I find attractive. That regular who comes in for hugs and chit-chat is a sad person, not very sexy at all.

This just cracked me up lmao. But seriously...you're on eharmony? I'm so sorry to hear that, good luck with that though.

simone87
08-18-2014, 09:06 PM
i think you *may* mean well, but you come off as very condescending, studying us like you're the crocodile hunter and lumping us all in together like we're not real people

Kellydancer
08-18-2014, 09:13 PM
At first I thought this was going to be about dating strippers one meets until I realized he meant in the club. Hell no, most dancers aren't going to date men in the club, especially men who don't spend money.

HallelujahHopkins
08-18-2014, 09:27 PM
Haha wow so much hate lol. Eh, it is what it is. Thanks for the comments.

James I think the hate is because your post is the epitome of objectifying someone. "How to date a dancer" implies the dancer is a prize and you somehow have to alter your normal "creepy" behavior in order to win this prize. You then go on to list the rules of the game. You are creating a hustle. We might seem flippant or resentful because the last thing we want in our personal life is someone trying to manipulate us, or someone who views dancers as trophies. Imagine if your post was titled "How to Date a Black" and went on to discuss the needs, qualities, and pitfalls of being a person of color. It would be loathsome piece of stereotype and dehumanization .

It's can also be offensive to be defined and desired solely for your job choice. "Yeah man, I'm hot for waitresses" or "Damn I love nurses" fetisizes you. Again you are an object existing solely for the pleasure of someone else. Personality is icing on the cake.

rainbowseven
08-18-2014, 09:44 PM
What HallelujahHopkins said is SPOT fucking on. All men that frequent strip clubs need to read and fully understand that concept.

kaninchen
08-18-2014, 10:01 PM
Hallelujah, it's so unfair that I can only thank you once per post!

kirakonstantin
08-18-2014, 10:16 PM
This read a lot like the bullshit I've read on Russian mail order bride sites. Because... all Russian women are EXACTLY the same, with the same wants, needs and values. I have two hassles, when I tried to date someone and most of the men I met had a sick sexual fetish they wanted to foist on me.

Try dating a woman for who she is, rather than what she does for a living.

kaninchen
08-18-2014, 10:29 PM
For the love of god, I cannot stand it when men say the best way to pick up a stripper is to not give her money. That's like saying the best way to make a dog or a cat like you is to not give it a bite of whatever you're eating. Do you really think that withholding our favorite thing -- cash -- is going to make us take you seriously?

How are you even going to spend the time to get to know us, at work, if you're not paying us? Would you be inclined to fuck someone who showed up at your job, day after day, wanting your attention and distracting you from banking? Please. You'd want that fool to GTFO and quit wasting your time.

Not only is this demeaning, but it's also bad advice. Terrible advice!

kirakonstantin
08-18-2014, 10:44 PM
^^Yeah. The guys who show up with no intention of spending money, but insist on my attention are annoying. If one of these guys tries to monopolize my time, I will tell them to buy a dance or piss off. I also make it a rule to never, ever date or get emotionally attached to an SC customer for any reason. One who doesn't even spend money has less than a zero chance of piquing my interest.

Date a woman you find interesting and attractive, not some ridiculous fantasy land steriotype.

PastelVixen
08-18-2014, 11:10 PM
Who girls are in the club is not at all who they are in real life. If you've only been talking to a girl in the club, I can guarantee everything she has been saying is all stuff that she considers "safe for the club." Things that aren't going to be a turn off to guys and aren't going jeopardize her safety.
On top of that, a lot of strippers already have boyfriends that they don't mention ITC for obvious reasons.

minnow
08-18-2014, 11:33 PM
This coupled with other thread by OP sure looks like a $3 bill. Post seems to be lifted from some e-book written by an ex club worker.

~*SwanPrincess*~
08-19-2014, 04:13 AM
We aren't going to pay attention to guys who don't spend money. Period. It doesn't matter if they are funny, nice, friends with the staff, etc. That all means nothing to us.

safado
08-19-2014, 05:38 AM
lmao. Did not read past "Why I wrote this:"

I feel sorry for everyone who wasted their time reading it all.

rickdugan
08-19-2014, 05:55 AM
I'm not surprised that the dancers reading this think I'm full of shit. A dancer's world is full of men who are full of shit.

No dude, they think you are full of shit because a lot of what you posted is goofy nonsense. This reads like one part PL fantasy about how strippers are in real life and one part bad PUA advice.

The quality of trolls really isn't what it used to be. There was a time when trolls knew enough about their subject matter that they could carry a thread like this for a while before it fell apart, but you couldn't even make it past the first post.

And an Ed Geins reference? Seriously? How old are you and how many people do you think even know who that is? LOL.

thatguy6673
08-24-2014, 06:55 PM
Ugh, that sounds terrible. Sit around watching tv in a strip club, don't look at boobs, kiss the asses of club management and staff for months so you can be in their 'inner circle'? Not buy lapdances and try really really hard to be funny and wait for a stripper to walk up to you to ask you on a date and give her your number when you are ignoring her and watching tv? I don't think I could fake doing so many things that are that unnatural in the strip club environment.

I always thought the coolest things about going to the strip club is you get dolled up ladies in their underwear flirting and showing you some skin without having to date them (even thought do you have to pay)and hear about their sick cat, fix their car, meet their mother, buy dinner, etc.....

azaleanola
08-24-2014, 08:21 PM
I got confused when there wasn't a link to buy his e-book.

banished avatar
08-26-2014, 08:44 PM
Some good general advice for someone who's clueless (both about dancers and women) but less so for the seasoned and those content w their status quo arrangement. Better advice (as in more applicable) would be not HOW to date a dancer but iding WHICH dancers would be up for it.

threlayer
08-29-2014, 07:21 AM
While his characterizations are very generalized of course, I realize that no one set of advisories will apply to everyone. That said, I think this is pretty good advice for those naive fools who actually want to date a dancer and who have followed bad advice or have had no advice at all. I notice that he does respect them, and advises wannabe dancer daters to show them respect. So much dancer dating advice does not.

While I have no idea why these women like to, or are willing to, display themselves naked to strangers, I am very glad they do because I love seeing it all. And believe me, my 'dating' advice is not to get any closer than that

wednesday86
09-02-2014, 01:01 AM
Yeah.....it would be really hard to get to know a dancer if you're not spending any money or buying dances. Once I realize a dude isn't going to give me money I stop talking to him and he gets the "time waster" label which is right up there with the "creep" and "captain save a ho" labels. Hell at least the creeps and scumbags PAY me. I'd say, buy dances but keep your hands to yourself, or even tell her not to dance but just sit and talk. Do not ask for her number. Come visit her, only get dances from her, always be respectful and if there's chemistry...who knows? If she likes you she'll let you know.

kirakonstantin
09-02-2014, 07:50 AM
There's a lot of talk in the "seduction" community about picking up strippers. We're this perverse Holy Grail of game to many, simply because dancers are more conventionally attractive than the average girl they'd meet in a nightclub.

This is riddled with PUA bullshit, such as the "shit test" concept. I also noticed that the poster responded to perceived shit tests (what the rest of us would consider valid criticism) with a neg.

When are these guys going to realize that this shit just doesn't work for anything more than a one night stand that may or may not be consentual.

Aurora_Sunset
09-02-2014, 08:34 AM
I can't get over the fact that the perpetual "knowledge" is to NOT buy dances. That the girl who you look at and label only as a "dancer" should not have DANCES bought from her because this somehow labels you a customer and only a customer, but if you sit like a bump on a log in the club where she's working, and not spending money on her, which means you are either not engaging with her at all or you're wasting her time, you will somehow make her.... fall for you? Where the hell does this keep coming from?

I've dated 2 customers from the industry. One was a 2 year long relationship, one was a few months fling that just kinda fizzled out. Both of these were originally customers. The only reason I had any interest in them at all is because they not only paid me, but liked me enough to only see me when they came in, and respected my time enough to generously tip when they really enjoyed the experience. I would never even consider going out with a guy who wasted my time by trying to talk to me, but not paying for my services. Why would I, in any way, be attracted to someone who clearly doesn't respect my time or my job? Or says he's into me, but seems like he obviously isn't into me enough to get a dance from me, but will from other girls? I can't believe I even keep hearing this tired "advice."

SexedUpCat2
09-02-2014, 09:26 PM
Anyone who calls me "dancer" repeatedly and only sees me as a "dancer" will not have nearly enough respect from me to even be considered dating material. You date a dancer like any other girl. You meet an attractive girl, you ask her out, and through getting to know her, you discover she's a dancer. Our work place is not the place to strike a date.

We have lives outside of the club just like real people.
Who'da thunk?

Aniela
09-02-2014, 11:07 PM
We have lives outside of the club just like real people.
Who'da thunk?


IKR? Regardless of what they might actually do for a living, any1 who actually buys into this crap is clearly not being paid to think.

amberlly
09-04-2014, 01:31 AM
Do you really want to date a dancer? All the late nights, fake tan and other drama that comes with a human relationship? Or do you just want hot company and entertainment?

If its the latter - my advice is be generous tipper and ask her when its quiet and you can come visit then. She will have more time and like seeing you and your money. Bring presents from time to time.

Have great manners and be loyal. You will have an excellent part time girlfriend who comes with the fun and half the expense. Paying upfront for her time is cheaper than dating someone long term.

wednesday86
09-04-2014, 10:01 AM
I can't get over the fact that the perpetual "knowledge" is to NOT buy dances. That the girl who you look at and label only as a "dancer" should not have DANCES bought from her because this somehow labels you a customer and only a customer, but if you sit like a bump on a log in the club where she's working, and not spending money on her, which means you are either not engaging with her at all or you're wasting her time, you will somehow make her.... fall for you? Where the hell does this keep coming from?

I've dated 2 customers from the industry. One was a 2 year long relationship, one was a few months fling that just kinda fizzled out. Both of these were originally customers. The only reason I had any interest in them at all is because they not only paid me, but liked me enough to only see me when they came in, and respected my time enough to generously tip when they really enjoyed the experience. I would never even consider going out with a guy who wasted my time by trying to talk to me, but not paying for my services. Why would I, in any way, be attracted to someone who clearly doesn't respect my time or my job? Or says he's into me, but seems like he obviously isn't into me enough to get a dance from me, but will from other girls? I can't believe I even keep hearing this tired "advice."

I actually saw the episode of the show 'The Pick Up Artist' where they talk about picking up dancers, and yep, that's the advice they give: don't buy dances. I was watching it with my husband and I was like "uhhh that would never work with a real hustler/professional stripper..."

I have also dated TWO customers before I met my husband. The first was hot, sweet, spent a lot of money on me in VIP and we just talked. I gave him my number. Turned out he was really boring when he wasn't drinking so it ended after date #1.

The second customer I dated was even hotter than the first, tipped me a $10 on stage. I found him after and gave him my number. If I had seen him OTC, say in the grocery store, I would have done the same. We dated for about a month but it just wasn't a match.

The only other guy that ever got my number was a regular that came in to see me weekly, usually dropped $300-500 on me. Never asked me to dance, but just hung out with me in the CR. Paid to have my car fixed. He was a super, super sweet guy and if he had been my type, I may have considered dating him..but he wasn't. Because I like hot, exotic looking guys and he wasn't it. I actually ended our "relationship" out of guilt because I knew he wanted more and I wasn't interested.

So my final advice to dating a stripper (that you meet ITC): Be extremely hot, be her type, be a gentleman and spend $ on her. You can't go wrong.

Vyanka
09-04-2014, 11:37 AM
What in the F? Who cares what she does for a living? Go by chemistry, not by job titles.
Strippers itc are made up fantasy characters, fyi. It's not their REAL personality. Working in the clubs, you should know this.

kirakonstantin
09-04-2014, 11:41 AM
1. This person has never worked in a club.
2. This person is unaware that dancers are normal people who wear sweats, do not always wear makeup, tbars and 7 inch heels.
3. This person believes that dancers are essentially blow up dolls with a pulse and good income.

threlayer
09-05-2014, 03:08 PM
There's a lot of talk in the "seduction" community about picking up strippers. We're this perverse Holy Grail of game to many, simply because dancers are more conventionally attractive than the average girl they'd meet in a nightclub.

....

I think it is because you are perceived as more available and sexually interested than the "average woman."

simone87
09-05-2014, 03:21 PM
^ i think its perceived that we are more Unavailable, and more sexually interested..its a bigger notch in your belt than picking up a bar fly

threlayer
09-07-2014, 01:58 PM
Available or Unavailable, depends on your perspective,

KikiGem
10-16-2014, 06:57 PM
Hmm so basically how to date a 'stripper' is to

A) waste her time and spend zero dollars on her. She will ignore you ASAP but in the meantime congrats, you've just cost her some money.
B) never shut up about the fact that she's a 'stripper.' Make it known that that is the main reason you like her. You want the 'stripper', not the person she really is.

Way to contribute to further the objectification and disrespect of strippers not just ITC, but for who they are as people!!

indyindy85
04-17-2016, 03:26 PM
This is awful sounds good in theory advice.